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tv, - «TOO LATE, ,<V - -' J*'"1,«- «, " •' * ̂ i' ,1 -" v '» S. %«*•_ JM A* Uf/.. '• * ..•*»« CAJFJSOT XiniBB rl"4 * rJ ..-w' inr nn« s. xtxwomtK L ISP mi • '•'•; f *llf,< „yU;I > vA*»'/*>• •. 'Wm »«i * ,m 'JM* m '-: ;• -'-i \;- :' •' .'•; ifi*V A'̂ ti* * *; •**?M **** • ito 1 " .» ;V, r*f >•** 4 'i;; " ,^; ^ > « « - % * ^ \ «*#« *1) ' ' it'.. ssfr'tMt :• ' :j|i< l#. v*.:s:*f f .*'*** U .1* iw ••"' ",*W /WtMR IsMtkeUtUechfldreCf j. As 1 put the open doors, MaUf>v murrr, wtth fh«i* pUgftdaflk MtMom chairs MtfttNWa, Tlim THHnh'" *•----*---- L-;-;^:,. ' dll mf *tffi &«rt loMMnw home, L'.:; *«J the boy whe from tta th*Mt>ol<)l **€'" . Barly learned 4B si» to KNMU Ok! God knows X waa «bworthy ',;::fvir" Of the trust He nn to me. < * ft^1 fcHua&4rfrirjhai^ ftMlilrfe <V.^S UMT IPMIV]mV IBOKr vBlluIm : - *t£ fett* mil a£i ok thUr Ibm*! j.' ii :, Tail «bm ntfle.gpr^tty stortea, 1 Laugh wtth'them, apd romp and play, it 1 kept from Willie'* childhood j . t Cfctupiood'a «pjn»h*ne aU away. WhenheOrapt ilty and HeM,! *, In the twilight, to my side, j Hoping tor a naf or story, , „'f.y , , A l t , * * J » a * n i h g I d e n i e d . " i r i « - Grave end oold, my heart refused bfan rsmMbm**M**r*lnnwn. i. • *-Be ww tKivtrea wlQi» itoM. ••• MB see the mute appealing lb Me ead and wistful eyea, •ihmi his tittle he»rt was m JPcr the love that cattate, Yet Cod knows I lored Mm t I was grave Mid stern and Aad.3 qpftte tonsroi the sunshine little lives should always hold. ; •» < oltfa life wh« cold and dHio^M As the busy years weut by. Bs was cheated of his childhood; • SMttM* far a chfld should die. •'4* Starred for love, he grew to mfnhop^i . Aad the want so long <den|^L ;, ; •< Dwvfed his soul. Oh, TOT the heart I crucified. . . . , i j f late, too late, I'saw my error; All his gfe had cheerlm Man, ' AM tt* **r<d was bright and4«nptt* OB the surface of its sin. Pleasure beckoned him to follow, ;tp? i AaA h» went so faraway, liiMh Vult, it he shoal* Mat fcfWKto, -*m "SOBMII " oalkd * pleasant, lazy voioe. #f Bbe Arop^d hot nfte! and looked up. II was only Bob--her ootudn, Bob met' ; *A<\ \ '+*** V . ; #i: <*? J; ,,,' • 'it i Tit*** i • I»< v i«MMf 0- Jit B*oouM hardly and *e War. Oh, QiS stem, accosieg sonsoiwy . Ever gnawing at my heart, Wften i think of what he tok| . our pathways turned I was an pry with hie follies, - -Aid 1 told hUB'̂ f fhe shame Be^rwbriBgia«o» his mnbood 4»d<»r ' -J*®. •' ' I £ U « < i*-i) ityJI •"/A*' 1 *in- W 'W Father," said he. and a quiver . . '^'H Ban through all the words he said^ ^ Hhat lam, yrn helped to maMe mi > <*» Batter far that 1 were de&4Mv ,; n tere never had a childhooUP 'i I am old before my time; Asi my uanhoed is a failure a • > Hi what ought to he its pAfMk " ttyoa had not put me from, yoa . n When I asked you, years ago, Vtr the 1ot» my starvM heart M^ou Jioped to see it grow, I balieve to-day your honor* Jlasd not shudder at my fBetl When I needed love so aiibl** 1' *Mr rt'-snis .Mai ever, ever foftget it? ttltats me through aai ttnragh, « Ihittbitteraocusatien, * i ,v ,-r ' That I felt was all too trqh I wa» dumb befoi* my vicQm, •., , j .(i|C»»iertft ,*tboru«libotiiateguiU^"'If*' . I:. " t I am guiltier than he.* §fp5S^' '" ' j- v*? " 'wte remorse for squandered .??. 'A " remorse would not avail, "'6h,'lby boy, inmke the MSiea' -( T«ead1ng yoa vwmy from - Let me try to be the father j, - .$ • j • 1 iraf paaa&t bf God to fee£», 7 •, :fjAh,Aa© late!" *m.wnmtAaa<ji{ #4' ." f i*ra drank too deep oi sia. ^ J Oa«»e« heart refuaed me aAba»*£ •dl' ' •' *o» I dare sot e®a**wftiln." :» f '*ahallfOta^^lofiaifer,* 1" t- •'j 4 , " .e«tnvi: Baari&« a dishoaotedmadiki ii" > y 1 - kl if you had loved me sooner, j KM I wandered Into shat^ t ** MO'i.* °«cIM^preai L,*C Love them;and let them sea , . Tfcatyoiuf lisa#ts asa wwmairt #r! >. * / »*"*!! of a'hom^where love is » ;;-|V-'" Wrtiga bitter tears to ,s, ftey tel1 me my own error ; Has coat me a paradise. ' " JtatOOXOBJ Wis. ,«!-> j -j'i+t « W' •ft- % H««4 TV*. _k* t Why, Bob, how yon «ta*t!ed awian, " vv*!l/viivuB16 •eiybaay.* ' » ' ^Ch® jonng man aaoaleeed in.f 44 You're always buay it aeems to m«, Snaan, when Fm about," he said, with a sort of impndenoe. "Won't ,t.f n . tl* *»i'S .fl.09j"4«< jjousm xoiL (*** It w&b an odd-loolis^ old rife let l^ith a single opol. Hot the sort of zmg, by amy means, usually chosen for a wed- ding^rihg. ' But it had been in the Bed- fern family foe ever so many yearn, and on the bright summer morning when XN? 3faok Redfern was to make pretty Susan Vbeafclej hia wile, he brought the opal nxtg#and with it* string of old-fash- *U* ioi^dF piakiah-tinted pearls." :̂ t l. .fj have always heard that, opals are unlucky,* &a£d Sqaan. "Why didk't yoii Cpt4t/pMk;. gold band; Jack?" - ' ' ) "It was aaj mother's wedding-ring, «nd my grandmother's, and my great- gMW^mqihef s» afid vajbe even, further bade timm. that." " • - A yeaar had sped by.' In- the waning b/^theas of departing summer, Susan sat in the oid trysiing-place alone. Thp quMai ©pal ring glittered on her finger. She tottehed it caressingly, turning the atone to catch the sunlight, her pensive ; £0- -AFIA-IUU-OF «HED-TEA*% ^BENDER-SMILE , parting her lips; |s ska thought of her hmppy bridal morning, only one short jaar ago. ••g tor Jiwsk was gone! (gone off over 6. aeaa; never to return, periiaps; ^one, ^ not.i>fte wor£ or line had come to her since that terrible night of his go­ ing. Bfrt aW waited aid hoped with faith which is born of deathless ='v •. « J'X W V r-f C': •/ ,i T ^ Jack, fond and proud of her in his oiftsctiliiie fashion, had been prone to be jealous. Witliout cause, as he confessed M himself, but the miserable failing jjg'a eemed to be pirt and parcel of his H Wltwre. One afternoon Buaan had gone into liar garden to weed her. flower-beds, aiult awaiting her husband's return. : «ai • '*W, * •siH'1'- i «$ $4i you shake with a fellow, for the flftke of old times f* 1 ' f k flush rose bn fee yoting wifefa oheeks, but she gaVA Bob the ttyi df bor fingers. •• ; ' ' ' • " ** On her girlish days Smmn lad been a good deal admired--for her own sweet' face and winning ways for the most part; bnt.ina few capes the fact that aha would inherit tta old "Wheatley homestead served fc? enhanoe}ier attrac­ tions. 1 Her Coftfcin Bob was' one of her meat ateidabus admirers. *He followed her like a shadow, and even after her en­ gagement to Jack Bedfern was a little disagreeable by his marked devotion. After her fo&rrioge, on one occasion, Connin Bob had excited Jack's jpaloua anger by making himself over-attentive to Susan, and some pretty hard words had passed between them. ' 1 Bob took the finger-tips she offered, held them an instant, and then carried them to his lips. 41 How dare you? " cried Susan, snatch­ ing her band away; then picked up her rake and want on with her weeding. MLet me do that for you, Susan," he aaadi after a minute. * H you were my wife, you shouldn't drudge like a slave.". Vfiusan gave Mm a biasing glance.. "But I atn not your wife, and glad enough X am of iV aha replied. ** Gi> away. Bob; I doat want you here when Jaek is abaent." Bob laughed an fegty, provoking sort of lough. ! •" " I suppose not. You're afraid bell ioomh and find yoii here, the jealous brute. But I am not going." " Then 111 go myself," said the young wife, and left the garden. ' Bob stood irresolute a mintlte, half regretting what he had done, half in­ clined to follow his cousin, and beg her pkrdon. Something glittering in the mold at his feet caught his eye. He stooped and picked up the old opal ring, which had always been a little large for his cousin's finger. His first impulse was to.return it 'to Susan at once; his second was to l$ep it* and pay Jxer off for treating him so scornfully. «JIe slipped it in his vest pocket ju&d took his way to the village tavern. The place possessed a great charm for Bob. He ordered a bottle of wipe, and then branny and seltzer, and by sunset was npt quite himself. Lounging in ,the tavern porch he saw Jack Bedfezn com­ ing down the road, and/a wicked thought flushed through his excited brain. "He's coming in. Now, bdys," b* cried, "look out for some fun." ' . JaJdk came in to leave a message with *he tavern-keeper, and, having delivered it; was going out again, wheii a loud voice caught his eap. •Here t̂o p t̂y Susan Bedfern !* it s*id. :; 1 'Be wheeled round. Bob was just in the act of drinking his glass. "How dare you trifle with my wifefa good name? " demanded Jack. • »(Bob laughed sneeringly. ' * When a woman shows a fellow favor, he dares everything," he answered, and "held up his right hand. On the little fiun^r gleamed the opal ring. Jack, saw it, and his dark face flushed crimson. He cleared the dis­ tance between himself and the speaker with one bound, and More the bystand­ ers could interfere had felled Bob to the ground. " Stand back, neighbors," he panted, as he tore the ring from the prostrate man's S&gee. « Fll hava kit life for iif , > But the bystandere interfexad, and •Bob was got out of the way. Jack went home, with all the bright­ ness of his Hfe dashed out. His young wife met him at the door, in the silver sheen of the spring twilight. He caught her, imd held her at ami's length. " Susan,* he said, angrify, *jwhere i* your wedding ring? * * Why, Jack," flushing and speaking witii embarrassment " it was on my fin­ ger; I hope I have not lost it," Her husband threw her from .him, with a muttered exclamation, andatrode out oi the house without & word. ;AU through the night, from the rising tp the setting of the stars, Susan waited, but Jack did not return. She fopcj*d he was angry because her wedding ring was missing, and wept herself ill over his cruelty. Morning came at' last, and Mrs. Bed- fern , Jack's mother, appeared. She had the opal ring on her finger, and a letter from Jack in her hftrul, "Your husband has returned the opal to me," she said in a severe voice. u ffi« letter will explain the rest." Susan read the letter, and then, with the pathetic cry, "Oh, Jack, come back to me!" fell at Mrs. Bedfern's feet in a swoon. The tulipehadbloomed, and were with­ ering on th^ir stalks^yi the garden, when she awoke from that awful trance of death. On her white, thin finger glim­ mered the old opal. Hearing, of her illness, and bitterly remorseful for the svj! hs fesyi Bob fan? taM the troth about the ring. ,JBut. #;lRia too! late. Jack had gone. , <i "111 find him, and bring him back to bar, if it costs my life!" said Bob, in reaouorse. And, with a last look at her death-like faee, he departed. > Months came and went, and the cry of the little new-borh bab<» wad'heard in ttie collage. • • v 1 •' ' ^Jack's Kttle Mby,* said Buwta, as it Iskyon herheMrt, *ididTiA tzu^rfiever Hee it!^ , ,, i *i And now, in the eariy autumn, die sat by the old stile, waiting for the post­ man's arrival. She had waited so many, many times, bnt sarely the letter would come to-day j the letter from Jack as­ suring her that he loved her still. The -shifting sanlight fell on her fair head; a golden leaf fluttered here and thews across the greett turf at her feet. Wife and mother in one, heir bosom thrilled with tender longing. Susan looked at her wedding ring, and waited. A quick, resolute tread on the white country road below, ^o^ 'thMb be the postman'f nag? ; Susan looked up, with hqr heart in a wild flutter. It waa npt the postman but a tall, bronzed man. " Oh, Jack! oh, Jack!" : j. In a twinkling Jaak had liinr in his strong ansa, and his tatts wm on her oheek. • i " " Oh, Susan, can yon forghtttfce?" he teid, witha chokifeg5Voice. ' ' t- u ' "There is hotfting to for^fvfe," she said, clinging to him. " See, Jack, I have got my' wedding ring! Jack, you can never know how my heart has hun­ gered for you. Jack," hiding her hot face in his breast," there's some pne be­ side me to welcome yon. Can't you guess, Jack? A little wee ljtaby, Jack, with his father's own eyes. I thought once you would never .see him, Jack, but thank Heaven you have oome." . He oonld only hold her close to his heart; he had no words to answer her. "Jack, how did you know?" she asked, at last, when the first rapture of the reunion wall ovte.' #, |>id Jtm get my letter?" " No," he answered hoarsely. " It was Bob.' He followed me across the ocean, found me, and told me every­ thing. Oh, Susan, say that you do really forgive me!" ,v , " Come and lpojt ^t baty," was Susan's reply to that. MARE ON TUB STOMACH. V ft oaosaa w. wciu.-.'- J ^ """ j" Tnefe |s not a more generous, self- sacriflcing man in the world than Mr. DesForges' care for another trip, he would walk to Chioago.̂ -lfttoaufcae j | ii. W- "1-31 ... 4. .41 A .J ww* in, g£u ittruioi uuv %rs. TMM KS* OF HM»PISAtOBH DEM COLDS. fhfc mdoptis rhetim which calls out the morning cough is due to the'Changes of temperature to which the lining mem­ brane of the air passages is f kposed in cold weather. People pass rapidly from in-door temperature of 60 deg. Fahren­ heit to out-door temperatures varying from 40 deg. to 32 deg., and far belo^r that very often, and then ohanges in the vascular supply of the mucous membrane of the jwuup&fis&ges are set up. If i everybody at all times only breathed through the nqse», the inspired air would be warmed -by passing over the coils of blood-heated plates which exist in the nose for that purpose, and* would not affect the air passages placed behind the turbinated bones. Bui such ia not ^ the oase; they probably com­ mence "to talk, and in doing so drrfw in by the month cold air, which, on mix­ ing witir the residual air in the chest, lowers its temperfctrire, and then a fluxionary hyperemia follows, and, after it, in its train, a mucous rheum. The best plan for persons who thus catoh their winter cough to'adopt is to keep their mouths closed; but then humanity is not generally prepared for such self- denial, and the respirator suggests it­ self as the agent required. Ladies who take carriage drives wrapped in fun copiously and provided with foot warmers in their carriages and flasks of hot water in their muffs often catch cold when put. If they would further conserve and eoonomize their body- heat by the uae of respirators, which take up some of the heat of the expired air and give it off again to the cold, jj^pired air. then they would not only be more comfortable, but they would escape many a t oatanrh and much coughing.--Dr. FothergiU, of London. • " « 11 " '1 1 ' : f.. , UVMAX xucmx MATCK. !i'v Lighting gas with the finger ia a feat anybody may perfOTm. Let a person,; in his slippers, walk briskly1 ovef a woolen carpet, scuffling his feet there­ on, or stand upon a chair, with its fog« upon four timbers to insulate it, and be there rubbed up and down on the body a few times with a muff, fy a second individual, and he will light his gas by simply plaeing Ms finger to the ttibe. It ia only necessary to take the precau­ tion not to touch anytMng, or * be touched by anybody, during the trial of the experiment. The stock of electrici­ ty acquired by the process we have de­ scribed is discharged by contact with another object. One person must turn on the gas while the other fires il , •: . * i STREET cars manufactured in Bridge- I port, Ct., find sale in London, England. his way to aocommodate a person than anybody. He is not as demonstrative as some, but he is a very noticing man, and you dont have to take a club and beat a joke or anything into hi in. He •eems to grasp the ritnation. Npt long ago he was going to Chicago on some business, and the depot, just as the train Fas about,to start, a man rushed up to Mm with a real old female, and naked DesForges if he would aee her through all right to Chicago. He said, instinctively; "Why, certainly, of course," and took her saohel, and as they were climbing into the car the inan said,." She is my wife's unmarried sister." Mr. DesForges did .not have much time to look her over, aa she had a veil on, but he got a seat for her, and had another one turned over by the brakemsjQ, and he sat down in front of her. As she raised her veil he was somewhat astonished, as she was about 45 years oil, thin as free soup, and with talking utensil? that would make a man wdep. DesForges gazed at her with an expression that seemed to say, "Why is this thus?" He pondered over the freaks of nature that occasionally occur, and wondered why all women couldn't be beautiful, and about 17 years old. She talked incessantly, and he noticed that a couple of her false front teeth were loose and dropped down about a ^ttarter of to Mch every tiine her jaw moved, and one under tooth had an up­ ward tendency. Before the train had got out of town she began to talk about being hungry. She had left home be­ fore diftner, and had got to the dep6t too lata to eat anything, and if did seem as though she should starve. DesForges stood it out as far as Bay View, when he made up his mind it was dangerous to be there with her un­ less she got something to eat, so he chartered the train man and began loading her rp with* oranges, apples, candy, and everything eatable that hp had. By the time the train had got to Kenosha she had eaten about every- thing the train man had except his bas­ ket of vegetable ivory,, and he was about to try that on her when he thought he would stand her off till the train got to Waukegan, when he would get her a lunch. He said she had a stomach like an ostrich. At Wauke­ gan he went out and got a whole news­ paper full of stuff, baked beans, sand­ wiches, doughnuts, a couple of pies, some sausage, and everything he could .find, enough to provision a car-load of tramps. . •, Eat? He just sat and gaaed at her. He feared that she would die on his hands, explode or have congestion, and he was thinking how he Would word a dispatch to eead to her relatives, announcing her death. Then he thought it was his duty to reason with her, bilt it was a delicate matter. Hp broke ground gradually by asking her if she had ever studied the anatomy of the human body. She bit off a piece of sausage and said she had, some. He asked her if she had read many books that treated on the diseases of the digestive or­ gans. She said, as she- bit a camel's track out of a pie, that she had perused a few such works. DesForges was gaining a little, and he said: "Ma dune, excuse me for seeming to be im­ pertinent, but have you read "Hare, Upon tlie Stomach?" "Red hair upon the stummick!" said she, in horrpr, and she drew a link of sausage on him, but finally returned it to its holster. * Well, if the car had turned over eight times, there couldn't have been more of a commotion. When he propounded the question die was banking up her teeth with one of these stiff custard pies, about like the asphalt that they make sidewalks of. She stopped right in the midst of the pie, with her mouth open, turned pale, and said "You in­ sult me, sir," and, grabbing up her saohel and the remains of the meal, she fled to the rear end of the car, and, when the oonduotor came along, she had a long conversation with him. Des­ Forges thought she must be orazy, and he had half a'mind to get off and wait for the next train, when the conductor sat down by him and asked him if he didn't know any better than to insult an unprotected female. He said if buying out a grocery and a train-boy to feed a woman, and get her fat, was insulting her, then he was guilty. "But," says the conductor^ " die says you asked her if she-wore red hair for a chest protect­ or. DesForges then told the conduct­ or the circumstances of her appetite, and that he feared she was overloading her stomach, and asked her if she had read the new book by Dr. Hare, of Bos­ ton, on diseases of the stomach. * The conductor tried to explain to her that no offense was intended, but she just looked out of the window all the way to CMcago and wouldn't speak to anybody. It is safe to say that if, anybody should attempt to place an ancient woman in A TRUE HEROINES, ,jtn Tmsistent of the While tho British army had possession of Philadelphia, and Washington's army was camped about the city, the follow­ ing incident took place: t The English Adjutant General made his headquarters at the house of a man named William Darrah. This man's wife was a true friend and patriot, true to her friends and country. . ,r , The house was in • secluded part of the city, and the English officeft often held their private meetings there. On of these occasions the Adjutant8r' RRNT YOUTIG W^TORR, , . like an apple, ripe and lfanow--- Not too young and not too oli; Half inviting, half repulsive, TSom MvmiMM mu & ( • s-. * & a * ' h ii*. '• one General ordered Mrs. Daprxah to have"1 the upper back room made ready Ipr the1 reception of the officers. "And Lydia," he said, in o6ndluaion, ***; * be sure that aH yolfr laifcily 4r« in-fee# by 8 o'clock." Fearing to disobey, Mrs. Darrah had everything ready, and her entire family^ s' in bed by. fi otalock, when the'ofBeers* came.' ' " 1 - ' • As the General's order had been very emphatic, Mgher impulse than mere curiossty prompted Mrs. Dartah to be­ come a listener. Accordingly, when all was quiet, the slipped out Of hpr room into the hall. , / The room where the officers were holding their meeting was at the other end of the hall. Quickly and quietly aheran to that, part of the hall, and, placing her ear to the keyhole of the r jom door, listened. As she did so, she heard one of the officers read an order from Gen. Howe, commanding the Brit­ ish army to move against Washington's oawPt, * This waa enough. After hearing this, Mrs. Darrah hurried back to her room and entered, locking the door. Soon she heard a rap on her door. She knew what it meant, but she did not get up till after three successive knocks. Then she got up and let the Adjutant General and his friends depart. The next morning Mrs. Darrah wafi up bright and. early. Flour was need­ ed for the family, end, taking the bag, she went to the mill, three miles dis­ tant. But she did not go for the flour alone. She had a great secret wMch she intended to make known to Wash­ ington. After leaving her bag at the mill to be filled with fldur, she hurried on toward Wadiington's camp. l ( On her way she met Lieut. Craig, one of Washington's officers, to whom she told her secret. • She then huxried home, stopping at the mill for her bag of flour: On that cold, starry night she saw the English soldiers leave the pity for the attack OH Washington's camp. A few hours later aha saw the same troops return to the city. The Adjutant G«nerfel sootT Ffti6ii04t his headquarters, and, summoning MM*. Darrah to his room, he said to her: "Lydia, were all your family to bed at S o'clock last night? "They were," replied,t MRE. DarraA, quiokly. ' " ' "It's strange," mused the officer "Wye. have certainly been betrayed by somebody. You, I know, were fafttf asleep when I rapped on your door, for I knocked three times before I aroused you. When we arrived atj^ten. Wash ington's camp, we found Ms cannon all mounted and his troops underarms. So we were forced to march back to the city, without making the , attack, like a parcel of fools. Mrs. Darrah entreated Lieut. Craig not to give her name, for she feared the fury of the enemy But the English never fannd out who betrayed them on the night that they marched against WasMngton's camp. Sho has atvdisd immsn natura; ®he is aehoolfBd ia ill bar aM; f' She haSSaken her diploma ' ' . As a mistnaaoC aHfeaarls., She can teBlfasvaty moaa--fc "* % ' £! ~'wim te ijfKi ucrwuui w iMirV', ^ A Qfct • *naid is aemeWmta oharml&g; S But»widow all fee <nfcil«. ? . j* ^ , Axe yon sad? How very serious v Will her handsome faee beo6tte! j* Are you mtij ? She is wretthed, j < 1 loatty, friendless, toatfo»;iduialff Are you mirthful? How het laugh*?, Sflver-WKtadin*, will tftg HO7 5,, ^ the can lure, and citeh, ml play fm. w§ I ' I As the angler deee the trout. |f YfeoM bactfelore dt'totffs' 4 * Q *0 bold an< of twenty, Who tywe grqwn so hold and Young Americans With the love-looks In yor^eyaa' .You may practice all the IHNA . Taught by Capid since Ute fal|, ^ -V But I know a little widow • W&o could win ad tool, youttti |t IP LEAS ANTRIM8*; FIBM friends--Partners.' THE wbmen are, ot should be, home rulers, to a man.' A LADY need not be aai she jumps at an offer. A BcoLpiNO woman, like the train* conddotor, ii pretty much alway^ on tha rail. , M THBA8HnrQ Ajr JRDITO& ' ^occurred in the lobby of the United States Senate, just in the rear of the President of that august body. The thrasher waa the notorious Billy McGarrahan, who claims the ownersMp of the New Idria quicksilver niine, in California, and the thrashee was equally notorious Donn Piatt, editor of the Washington Sunday Capital. A Senate bill, referring the question to the Cottrt of Chums, was on the Senate calendar, but an objection wins made to its consideration- A few min­ utes afterwards McGarrahan met Piatt, and denounced him as having written articles personally abusing him. Words ensued, which were soon followed by blows, and Piatt was knocked down. When he rose, McGarrahan knocked him down a second time, and, seizing him by the collar with Ms left hand, gave him several heavy blows in the faee with his right fist before they ootdd be separated. Piatt was led to a wash­ room, where the blood was washed from his face. He was then placed in a ouiuge «nd drivej home. Mm. MANDL, the American citizen, who was not permitted to lecture in Ber­ lin on " Emigration," has published a pamphlet in English, French and Ger­ man, in wMch he contends that emigra­ tion to Texas and the Western States is the only remedy for the eoonomie crisis in Europe. A PRETTY girl calls one of her admirers "Poor Cloth," because he floesn't wear well. tfrice tefore you speak, es­ pecially at an auction sale of old tin- pans. • . f, . THE fellow who tumbles off the "tail­ board " of a wagon is the »»*»» who "falls • behind." . ,,, > • ( r "THB*4'B rftusio in the h«fer," says Jott^s. Jones has A brand'new baby at Ms house; DANCING has been introduced into the army. Probably you have heard of its squad-drill*. SOKE .malignant slanderer Bays: "Woman needs no enlogiat, ft»r s^tf speaks for herself." THE grocer ottered him a frozen ham, but he said he'd rather not take the cold shoulder from any one. "GEORGE, dear, don't you it's rather extravagant of you to eat butter with that delicious jam?* "No, my love, economical; samp pieoe of bread <doea for both.V J "IF you can't keep awake," said a pazson to hia1 hearers, "when drowsy, why don't you take a pinch of snuff? " " I think," was the reply, " the snuff diould be put in the sermon." . AN old man'who had been badjyhurt in a railroad collision, being advised to su6 the company for . damaged, said, "Well, no, not fpr dunages. I've had enough of theip; but III just sue 'em for repairs." # "WHY did you not admire my 4*°gh- ter? " said a laify to a gentleman. "Be- cfuse," said he, "I am actually no judge of painting.". "JBut, surety," rejoined she, "you never spw an angel that waa not painted." EVEBY once in a while we hear of a California woman killing a bear. This is all right. »But we challenge the .world to ransack the pagesof history and show us where a woman haa eyer got .away with a mouse. THEBE are two ways to settle a diffi culty in this Country. One is to fight a duel and the other to set up the drinks. ,Tho latter is now regarded aa the most fasMonablp.-->4tfanta Constitution. ( s l „ " "MAMMA, did they use to have car­ riages in Jerusalem ? " asked a very little boy just from the Sunday-school. "I don't know, dear; why?" "Because I heard the minister talking to-day about • the Hacks of*the Apostles." AN Irish Wicklow Quaker WM re­ cently replied fo by a lady listener. The Quaker was exclaiming against agitation. The lady responded: What good In tha world was ever, done without agitation? We' cannot even make butter without it." WHEN Lord B died, a parson met an old man who waB one of his most in­ timate friendB. He was pale, oonfused, awe-struck. Every one was trying to console Mm, but in vain. " His loss," he exclaimed," does not affect me so much as his horrible ingratitude* Would you believe it? he died without leaving me anything in Ms wiE--I, who have dined with him, it his own house, three times a week for thirty yeara!" OWED *0 SPRING. March on, 0 season of promise I Sure promise to iUs a score; To the aches and pains that rack us Thbr. art the open door. 1 Consumption-breeding weather. Our vitals harsh assails, While rheumatism runs riot. And croup thlce snow reign hails. Abettor of old neuralgia, Of coughs and colds the parent-- O spring, you've sprung upoa as, And are right on your slay beat! Ye busy doctors, whether land or seas on. The season bless for purses well replsaishad; Ye jolly undertakers, rejoice that things conspise To fill your oaffera through the ished. --Chicago Comntmxial irfssrfrtsr. 'v#.< "A