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McHenry Plaindealer (McHenry, IL), 25 Oct 1882, p. 7

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"IWlEN THE FROST IS OW THK WHtlUW. " When the frost is on the ponkin and the fod­ der's in the shock, Aha yon hear the kyoaok and gobble of the fltruttln' turkey oock, And the claokin of the giiineys and the dncUa' of the hens, And the rooster's hallyooyer h he tiptoes on the fence, 0, ltv then the time* a ftlWi a feelin' at his very best. With the rMn' eon to greet him from a night of jrracious rest, As be leaves the ho as© bareheaded and goes oat to the ft ck, When the frost is on the ponkin and the tod* der'a in the shock. They's wmethin' kind o' hearty-like abont the atmosphere When the he»* of rammer's over and the oooHn" Fall is here-- *® Of course we in ins the flowers and the blossom on the trees. And the mumble of the hnmmln' birds and bu«- afn'of the bees; Bnt the air's co appetizin'; and the landscape , through the hue Of a crivji and sunny morning of the early aa- tumn dayn . • Mi picture that no painter has no oolorin' to ; i mock-- When the frost is on the pnnkin and the fod- der's in the shock. The husky, rusty rustle of the tnssels of the corn, And the r&^pin' of the tangled leaves, as golden ' us the morn; The stubfo e in the tarries, kind o' lonesome like, but sti 1 A preachin' sermons to na of the barns they jrrowed to fill: ?. The strawstack in the medder and the reaper in the shed; The bosses in their stalls below, the clover overhead; O it sets my heart a clidrin', like the tfcUn' of a clock, When the frost in on the punldn and the fod­ der's in the shock. - v --Indianavolis Journal. &ESSRS. JONES & CO. 1 guess pa and ma were pretty rich one time, for when they "came to Cali­ fornia it was on their wedding tour, and cost lots--came by the way of New York and Washington and Panama City, in a steamboat; and ma brought a maid to wait on her, and pa had a servant named Jim; and when we got to California--I Bay we; I'm only 14 now, but I was not born then, though that don't matter--I guess pa had lots of money. I was born at the Lick House, and you ought to see my- bal y clot lies. Jones & Co. haven't the kind of goods those were be­ cause M.iud has dragcled them all to pieces. Maul is the baby. Six years old Maud is, and it won't be long before she will be a clerk for Jones & Co. First babies always have the nicest things. Ma says first babies are like second wives. 1 Well, I am of the opinion that after pa \£ent into his house on Van -Ness avenue he went into stock--, whatever that means. Going into stocks must be a curious business: and sometimes C .me home looking splendid, and wanted to buy everything, and laughed at me for being so me in and not getting better clothes; und 1hen lie wanted to drive in the park and go to the theater. One day he came home with a brand- new carriage and a span of long tail horses and a coachman and a footman. Then sometimes pa came home and looked very blue* and talked about stocks, and I began to watch pa, and noticed that f-ometLines when he laughed the loudest he looked as if he wanted to cry. and then he sold the horses and •hen the house, and the furniture was sent to the auction, and ma felt very bad, and pa wasn't like himself any more, and never told me stories nor kissed me; and once when Maud was asleep in his arms he kissed her and cried, and when" I told ma she guessed pa did not feel very well, and then she cried. After this we went to a board- ing-houR"--i na^-tv, musty boardiug- house. Everything was weir enough, but a bo rding-house ain't like home. Then the baby came, and it died, and ma almost died; and I heard pa say to the man that kept the boarding house ttut he was pretty tight up, but it was all coming out right; and the next day pa didn't have' anv watch or sleeve-but­ tons. I didn't seem to notice, it, because I saw that may Iks he had sold them to pay board; and I heard pa and ma talk aw*y into the nii'ht, and sometimes ma cried, and pa would look in the morn­ ing just as if he hadn't slept a wink, and I don't believe he had. Once it was dreadful. Pa came home tipsy; pud I never saw ma feel so bad, never; and then they talked it over, and finally jna went home to grandpa's in New York, with Maud, and I stayed with pa to go to school. Then pa kept getting worse and worse, and went to live in ^ooms and eat in restaurants; and pa staved out lafe nights, ancl I guess he drank more thim w as good for him, and I thought something had got to be done. Bo I said to pa one day: "Pa, let's go into business, and open afitore." "1 "'^ftnd he laughed and said: "What kifld of store'?" ; And I said: "Oh! a candy store, or a stationery store or a thread and needle store, just such as women keep and little girls hefp in." And pa laughed and said he would tliink of it, and when he came heme tint uicrht I asked him if he had thought about it, and he si idJie had not; and I said he had betferNjind he s tid he would: and that morning^ he didrf't go out. but, stayed at home and wrote me a long letter. So next day I went into a store on Polk street, kept by a nice old l«uly who had a bad husband, where they s ld everything, and she said in French they called it lingerie. I did not know what she meint, because it was French, and I asked her if she did not Dr&nt to sell her store, and she said: v "D<> you wunt to buy a store, little girlV" And I said: "My pa does." And she smiled and said she guessed- the Sheriff won d have a store to sell in a few days. I said I would tell pa, be­ cause lie knew Mr. Nunan, the Sheriff. It \y-as one of Mr. Nunan's men that sold pa's house and furniture for him. i. And the next day I told pa about the store, aud what a nice one it was, and he had been a dry-goods man once, and Had had a large store, and sold silk • diress goods, and velvets and furs, and laces worth more than $1,000 'apiece. I don't exactly know what pa did, but I tliink something "turned up" a few days afterward, for I heard him say he had made a "r.iise," and lieu,showed me'more than $1,000 in gold and notes, and for a day or two he carried them in a side pocket, and mostly kept his hand over them, for fear they would jump out and fly away; and pa bought toe some shoes and a hat and stuff for aprons, and I made them myself, and I never saw pa look so happy since ma -#ent away, and one day he said to me: " Ycvie, I have l>ought the store on Polk street, and you arie to be my sales­ woman and partner." ^And, sure enough, in a few days we ipent into the stove, and over the door -was a great big sigh of "Jones & Co.," and pa said I was the "Co." And when I said, "And so, pa, you are Jones," he blushed, and I guess he didn't like his old friends to know that he was selling needles and thread and tape and things. .We had two snug little rooms in the took of the store to sleep in, and I made pa's bed and swept oat the room and tidied things. At first pa shut "ftp the store when he had to go down town on business, but after* a little while I tended it, and when there were two cus­ tomers in the store I waited on one, and it wasn't long before I, could make change and sell things almost as good aa pa could; and by and by when he went down town I tended store, and we had splendid times. We went out to a nice place across the street for our meals; I tended store when pa went, and pa tended store when I went. One day pa came in and looked dread­ fully troubled, and then I said : "Pa, ain't I a partner, and don't partners have a right to know everything, and ain't you hiding something about Jones & Co. ?" And then I found out that pa had bought too many things for tlie-i store, •and that a note for $1,000 had to be paid,* and that's what made pa feel bad. And then I thought and wondered how I could get $1,000; and I kept on think­ ing over everybody that I guessed had $1,000, and every one that I guessed had it I guessed would not lend it to pa. And then I thought about the rich Mr. Flood, and said: " I will go down to his bank and get it, for he's got more than $1,000,000,000; and down to the Bank of Nevada the cellar is full of g©h|, arid, of course, he doesn't use it all the time; and before Mr. Flood wants it I'll take it back and pay the interest." Arid then I jumped up and hurrahed for Jo ics & Co., took my best bonnet and on my gloves, took oil mv store apron and combed my hair, and got into a car; went to the Nevada Bank, told the clerk I wanted to borrow SI ,000; and lie laughed and said I had better see Mr. McLane. I asked who Mr. McLane was, and the clerk said Mr. McLane was the P: esident and was in the backroom, and I went in the back room, and Mr. McLaro said: " Well, little girl, yfh&t can I do for you?" . . . ' And I said: * I want to borrow $1,000." » Mr. McLane opened his eyes and turned his chair around and looked at me and said: " A thousand dollars." with as much surprise as though $1,000 was all the money lie had in the bank. Then I began to get scared and cried, and then I told Mr. McLane all alto^ pa "and " Jones Co.," and what we wanted to do with the money, and that I would pay it back to him; and he looked kinder puzzled, and he asked me what pa's name was, and I told him and where the store was, and all about ma and Maud, and how the baby died. I guess that was not very much like busi­ ness, and I don't know what Mr. Mc­ Lane waated to know all that for. Then he looked at me again, and I guess he wasn't gping to let me have the money, when a gentleman at the other desk came Tip to where I wds sitting on a chair, and Mr. McLane said: "Well, Flood, what do you think of this young merchant ? " And then I knew it was the rich Mr. Flood, and I looked into his eyes, and he said: ° „ " Let-her have the money; I will in­ dorse her note." Then I jumped, up and kissed him, and he kissed me; and Mr. McLane made a note for qjaety days and I signed "Jones & Co^* and Mr. Flood wrote his name on the back of it. I took the money away in a canvas bag, that. Mr. McLane said I must bring back, and I took the money to pa; and didn't he look surprised when I poured out the great big $20 gold pieces on the counter? Then I told him what had happened at the bank, and when I asked him if he didn't think I was a pretty good business woman after all, I guess he felt real ashamed. After this I never see anything like i!v--such lots of carriages and such nice ladies kept coming everj day, and most all of them traded with me, and pa Was just as happy as he could be. Jon<^§ & Co. was making lots of money. When' I took Mr. Flood's money back 4 just marched right through the bank, past the big counters, into Mr. McLane's room, and I took very good care to let the clerk that 1 tuorhed at me before see the bag. Mr. Flood came lfp and laughed, and Mr. McLane laughed, and I heard Mr. • Flood tell Mr. McLane they would have the lunch to-day. And then Mr. Flood told me if I wanted to bor­ row money again not to go to any other banks, but to come to his, and I thanked him, and l\fr. McLane brought mo my notes, canceled by a great blue "Paid" stamped across the face, right over where I wrote "Jones & Co." Then I told Mr. Flood that when we felt able to send for ma I should come over and borrow Rome more money, be­ cause I wanted to buv a house for ma and Maud, so that they wouldn't have to go into any more nasty boarding- houses, and Mr. Flood said I should have all the money I wanted. When we sent for ma and Maud, gravdpa gave ma the money to come, an 1 so we didn't have to borrow any money; and we took a nice cottage not very near the store,for pa didn't want ma to know about Jones & Co., though I was. just crazy to tell her. For several days we fooled her. She thought pa had a store down town and I was going to school. I told lots of fibs about being detailed at school, going down town* and all sorts of stories to account for be­ ing home late. One day who should I Bee coming into the store but ma? "Have you any pearl sliirt-buttons, litt'e girl?" said ma. - '• Yes, ma'am," said *1, looking her right square in the face. * Goodness gracious! " said ma. " Is that yon, Vevie ? " I said, " Beg pardon, ma'am, wh&t did you want? " And then ma looked at me again. - . I hod a store apron on and a small cap like a French girl; and because I wasn't very high pa bought me a pair of wooden brogans, with felt buttons, into which I slipped my feet, and they made me four or five inches taller; and ma stared at me and than laughed and said: " Oh, I- beg your pardon, l ttle girl; you look so much like my daughte-, Genevieve, that I thought you were her." Then I heard pa snicker down l>ehind the counter. He had seen ma come in .ind he h d. Just as soon ><s ma'wont out pa jumped up aud laughed and «aid : " Snatch off your apron and cap, Vevie, and run round the block and got home before your mother." I did so, and when ma got home she was the most surprised person you ever saw. We knew this thing wouldn't last, ami so that night we told ma all about the house of "Jones & Co.," and ma kissed pa and said he^was a noble fel­ low, and "just as good as gold." and she "never was so proud of him in all her life," and fell to kissing him and crying and taking on. I never saw ma act so foolish in all het life, and pa said she was "making love to him over again." Well, now, the story is about over. Ma came down to the store to help. At first she looked kinder Bheepish, espe­ cially when some lady came in she had known at the Lick House; but she soon got over all that and began to make bonnets, and we had a milliner store, and then she insisted upon saving the expense of a separate house, and we jnoved to a larger store next door, with nice rooms fixed to live in and a nice show window for bonnets; and little Maudie is beginning to be handy abont, and all of us work, and we are just as happy as the days, are long, and we have lots of money. _ I have never seen Mr. Flood but once since, when I went down to the bank unbeknown to pa, and told Mr. Flood and Mr. MeLane that any time they wanted to borrow $1,000 "Jones & Co," would lend it to them; ^nd they laughed and said, "Couldn't tell-- sttK-ks might go down." And then Mr. Flood said: "If all the people he had given money to would pay it back as I had he didn't think he would get busted in a long time." And then I saw the clerk that laughed at me, and I smiled at him and bowed; and since then he has been buying all his gloves at the store. I told him I thought he used a great many pairs of gloves, and he said they wore out very fast counting money. He is dreadful particular about his gloves, and if there is nobody in the store but me he is sometimes half an hour picking out just the kind he wants. Pa has bought a splendid gold watch ---a real stem-winder; and we--"Jones & Co."--have bought a nice large lot out on Gov. Stanford's new cable raiiroad, and paid for it; and if the times are good this summer, as pa thinks they will be, we shall have a house of our own again.--Sa n Fmnrisro CaXL Perfectly Amazed. In the San Francisco Evening Bulletin, we observe that Mr. Botenthal, of the well- known printing firm, Rosenthal & Roesch, 538 California street, tlnft city, said to one of their lejiorters: "We all know of St. Ja­ cobs Oil,, and are perfectly amazed at the suddenness of the relief it affords. If you know of any one who is suffering with rheumatism, bruise or sprain, tell them to use St. Jacobs Oil. . -jf Craig SKiDMone,^of Stanford, Ky. was charged with forging the license under which he was^iecently Quarried, I&jit the trial resulted in his acquittal. It calW out that the paper he offered as a marriage license was not inspected by either the bride's father or the offi­ ciating clergyman, and as it had disap­ peared there was no proof that a for­ gery had been committed. It is also stated that the woman is already the mother of an illegitimate child, and that the preacher who tied the knot got a half gallon of whisky for the job. He is said to have skipped out to avoid testifying in the case. Certainly an elegant remedy for all aches and pains is St. Jacobs Oil, says Dr. J. Turner, of Shirrell's Ford, N. C., in the , Ravenswood, W. Va., News. Maiik Twain's residence at Hartford is pointed out as one of the most taste­ ful as well as comfortable houses in that city. His study", wherein he performs expertly on a tvpe*writer, is in the rear of the. houSse, and screened by vines and evergreens. To deter the large number of sight-seekers who invade the place; Mr. Twain has posted on the study door this sign: "Step softly! Keep away! Do not disturb the remains!" In the center of the study is a table covered with l>ooks, pamphlets, newspapers, manuscripts, etc., etc., Intelligent minds can quickly learn a verse by heart. Stu-h knowledge may prove u-eful at some future time. Then learn this verse by heart: "Dr Guysott's Yellow Dock and Kai^aparilla contains Yellow Dock, Nar- Fnp oiia, Juniper, Iron, Buchn, Celery an ! Ca isaya, anil is the tin> st st- engci.ening me<li<'ine and blood puriti»-r ever compound-' ed from a physic;uu's proscription." Ask jour druggist to get it for you. Wh«n a landlord enters upon the premises he has leased, and does acts which render the building unsafe anil, unlit for use, and the tenant in conse­ quence thereof abandons the house, there is in law an eviction; and the court will not submit the question to the jury of what was the intention of the.landlord in doing what he did, in the opinion of the Supreme Judicial Court»of Massachusetts, in Skully vs. Shuts, decided in March. Rev. A. N. Ford, of W:ir>aw, Ky , writes: "I have used Dr Guy ho' t's Yellow Dock and Sarsaparilla with great ben- tit I think it beats the world as a medicine to pive str n<rtli and purify the blood. It has cur-d me of bad blood, weak k.dneya and poor di­ gestion. " An Irish antiquarian has reconstruct­ ed from old title deeds and surveys the fact that Dublin once had its Thing, or popular assembly of Scandinavian free­ holders; its Tliingmouut, or hill on which the assembly met, had its hang­ man's hill close by. The Scandinavians settled Dublin in force. The late Mr. Charles Haliday showed in his recently published book that the , old names stood as testimony to that fact up to a comparatively late date. . - " The Itrxt In the Market" •* Fond I)u Lac, Wis., Aup. 3,1881. H. H. Wabneb A Co. : .v?>*--I repard yonr Safe Kidney and Liver Cure the best r emedy m the market for kidney and liver diseases. John D. Gilbert, 24 West Piviiiion St "Whatdoes 'in memoriain' mean, pa?" asked Billy. " Oh," said pa, behind liis news- par er, " "it's* nothing. It's something you write on the tombstone of a man you are go ing to forget in a week."--Hnrlitigton Hawk- Eu*. APVICE TO COlfSUXra VES. On the oppMiaaoe of the first symptoms--u " general debility, low of appetite, pallor, chilly sensations, followed by night sweats and cough --prompt measures for relief should be taken. Consumption is twrofnkWH disease of the lnngs --therefore use the great anti-ecrofula, or blood %mrifier and strength restorer, Dr. Pierce's • •' Golden Medical Discovery." (Superior to cod , liver oil as a nutritive, and tmsurpftssed as a pectoral. For weak lungs, spitting of blood and kindred affections it has no equal. Sold by k druggists the world over. For Dr. Pierce's treatise on Consumption, send two stump-i to World s Dispkkka&x Msdical. Association, Buffalo, N. Y. "Hold up vour hands, " Yel.cd the Western outlaw, a he b arued a paiace-c.r anl showed up his | is-ols. "Are you a road agent*" a ked a frightened pas caper. "Yea" "Th ink Heave .! I feared you were a n o t h e r p o i t e r . " -- . W w * . WOMAN AND HER DISFAMfiS is the t itle of a large illustrated treatise by Dr. R. V. Pierce, Buffalo, N. Y., sent to any ad­ dress for tiiree stamps. It teaches suoeessfid •elf-treatment. A Cambridge (Mass:) man arrived in a frentie village, just as a gang of cowboys had taken the town." His iirst exc amati 'n was: "Have you folks a college here al­ ready?" * _ "Sinn wo noHE, ladies," for Dr. Pierce's " Favorite Prei-cription " is a prompt aud certain remedy for the painful dis­ orders peculiar to your sex. By all druggists. A Jersey (Trr woman was arreste l for smashing her husband across the nose with a red a dyi o\v worsted ni Hto bearing the words fcGod bless our home." , (ttiia engraving represents tiie Long? in a hcttthjr Rtatr.] A 6008 FAMILY REMEDY I STRICTLY PURE. Hannlea* li the Most Deiicat^! ' Corn*! Corns! Corn*'!. ..Everv one suffering from painful corns v.-ill'^j be triad to learn that there is a new and pain- : less remedy discovered by Which the very worst class of corns niay be removed entire­ ly, in a short time and 'without pain. Put­ nam's Paikixss Corn Extractor has already been used by thousands, and each person who hats given it a trial becomes anxious to recommend it to others. It is the only sure, prompt and painless cure for corns known. Putnam's Painless Corn Extractor is sold every where. Wholesale, Lord, Stoutenburgh ft Co., Chicago. Fritz's boy told his ,ather that he knew where the rain c irne from " t here were faucets up in the sky, and the aiurels tumei 'em on " Personal!--To Men Only! The Voltaic Belt Co., Marshall, Mich., wiH send Dr. Dye's Celebrate! Electro-Voltaic Belts and Electric Appliances on trial for thirty davs to men (voting or old) who are afflicted with nervous debility, lost vitality and kindred troubles, puarantoeinfr speedy and complete restoration of health amfin-m- ly vigor. Address as above. K. 11.--No risk "is incurred, as thirty days' trial is allowed. By Its faithful »N<> COBrSTTOPTIOX has been CI'IIKD when other rciiiocllM and Ptiywiclan* ltnve failed " . t* effect a cure. WnxtAN C. Pioof.k. merchant of Bowling Oreen, va., Writra April 4.1SS1. that he wants tin to know that Uie Lrs., Halsam )HIX rurett hi* mother of Conxttmit- J/oM. Hfter tlie lihvsieinn liail siven her lip as incura­ ble. He «avs. others knowing her case have taken the Balaam ami been eurtxi; he thinks all bo afflicted sliohM irive it a trial. Wu.: iam A. (tuium k Co.. wholesale dnimriots, Znni'svillc. Ohio, write u« of the cure of Mathiav Fbkkman. a weli-known citizen, who had been afflicted with Itnmc lntis in its worst form lor twelve years. The I.vni; Hai.sam cured him, as it has many others, of Bronchitis. As an Expectorant it has No Equal. For Sale by nil Medicine Dralcn. . MHOMAS ECLECTRIC Saving the CMM. < A few years ago a steamer was com­ ing from California. The cry of "Fire! fire!" suddenly thrilled every heart. Every effort was made to stay the flames; but in vain. It soon became evident tliat the ship must be lost. The only thought now was self-preserva­ tion. The burning mass was headed for the shore, which was not far off. A passenger was seen buckling his belt of ®old around his waist, ready to plunge into the waves. Just then a pleading voice arrested him: "Please, sir. can you swim?" -A child's blue eyes were piercing into his deepest soul as lie looked down upon her. - "Yes, child, I can swim." - * "Well, sir, won't you please to save me ?" "I cannot do both," he thought; "I must save the cliiltf and lose the gold. But a moment ago I was anxious for this whole ship's company; now I am doubting whether I shall exchange a human life for paltry gold." Unbuck­ ling the belt, he cast it from him, and said: "Yes, little girl; I will try to save you." Stc.oping down, he bade her clasp her arms around his neok, "Thus, 1 childnot so tight as to choke to me. There, hang on now, and I will try to make laud." ' The child bowed herself on hisl>road | shoulders, and clung to her deliverer, t With a heart thrice strengthened, and j an arm thrice nerved, he struck out- for I the shore, Wave after wave washed I over tlieni: still the brave man held out, land the dear child held on, until ft I mighty mountain billow swept the j sweet treasure from his embrace, and cast him Senseless on the rocks. Kind hands ministered to him. Recovering his consciousness, the form of the dear : child met his earnest gaze, bending ' over him with more titan angel minis* | trations, and blessing him with mute I but eloquent benedictions. A Postal Card to Ci.arkk Bros., Bible ; UI*Vr House, Ne\» York, the New Puhlwhers i ef line. (Iwap Subscription B >ok», for Uu-ir "/Vit-.i't I CircuJar tu AyeM*." It will puttie and asiosish you. (OtiKklt RHEUMATISM,: Neuralgia, Sciatica, Lumbago, Backache, Soreness of the Chest* Gout, Quinsy, Sore Throat, Sweff» ^ i inas and Sprains, Burns and v? Scalds, General Bodily ^ pains ' loaB, tar and Headache, Frosfef ; I Feet and Ears, and all other Pains and Aches. Wo Preparation on earth equal* Sr. Jaoom On. • a aafe, #wre, simple and cheup External Bemcdy A trial «ntai!s but th* OOBjpaimdTeljr > trifling outlay of SO Crate, and every on* aaffiNrisg with pain can hare cheap and poaitiVa proof of : •la: int. « Direction* In Hairan language*. * •OLD BT ALL DRUGGI8T8 AJTD IB MEDICIIE. A.VOGELER CO., - JBotMmor* JM.. lT.lt.jL / ' CANCER "I want to pass away treutly while prench- hip," says Evangelist ilnrnes," of Kentucky. Mhuy oi his audience are in open sympathy with the lemai k. <C_, ry • Free to All Ministers of Churches. I will Bend one bottle of White Wine of Tar Syrup, (grat is, to any minister. hut will recom­ mend it to his friends utter giving- it a fuir test, and it proves saiistjietory tor coughs, colds, tnroat or lung diseases. - Dr. C. D. Wakngb. Heading, Mich. The young woman who sneerin j ly remarks that men are -all allsc generally shows her sincerity by taking the first m-in that.oilers himself to her. --Boston Tratmrript Cures Rheumatism, Lum­ bago, Lame Back., Sprains and Bruises, Asthma, Catarrh, Coughs, Colds, Sore Throat, Diphtheria, Burns, Frost Bites, Tooth, Ear, and Head­ ache, and all pains and aches. Tht bett Internal and external remedy la the world. Every bottle guaranteed. Sold by medicine dealers everywhere* Directions^ eight language** Wet 50 cents and %xjo*. • FOSTER, MILBUl^N & CO., Prop'ra, BUFFALO, N. Y-. U. S A. MtSlt. F»IAISI O S icci ami terms. Hl-'.KIVS TKHI'I.F, OF ;t« SUitt- SUwt, CHICAGO. CURES WHERE ALL tLSt fAILS. BestConeh Syrup. Taatesgood. Use In time. t»old by drupgtats. A1Sl=MI«=MISinl INSTITtTT mi': KsmUliiihi it. ST!: Imorponrt* " isvi. Fit THE Cure ofCnneea. Tumors, tlctra, ScreMi and Skin Diskasrs. wlthont tlL » of blooo. and little pain Fo ENFOKXATION, C'th-rLARS AND BBFSRKNCCS, add UK. F. L. POBD, Aurera, Bjib* w., Uf "Ijt P A V flLv use ot kmie ur 10- KvIIh to B« Avoided. - Over-eatinjr is, in one seme, as productive .of evil as intemperance 111 drinkinvr. Avoid both, and Keep the blood purified with Mur­ doch I'.lood Hitters, and you will be re­ warded with xobust health and an iuvigor- ated system. Trice $1.00. Science teaches us that the whale is really not a fish. Vet som • of the tno-t trisrhttul lies on re.-ord have been told about whales. In Hot Wtttrr. Orpfe M Hodjre, Battle Creek, Mich., wri es: "I nrset a t a ket sle of boiling hot wat"r on my hand. I at one- applied Thom­ as' Eci.ectric On., and the effect was to im- m- diutt lv allay the pain. I was cured m Uiree davs." AOKNT8 Wanted. Rennor Mfg. Oo„ Pittsburg, Pa, llfiTPUCO 1 Jicwtfi-ttT, S11.VFRWare, retailed WE I liHrA I at wluilwalorutew. 1'rieu-liHt tree. If ft 1 HI IUU I T. W. Kennedy. P. O. Box *0. N. Y. IF YOU P1-X1RK A «OOI» FA KM IN IOWA, address U. M. MeQUlJi, Norway, Iowa. U A I D no»>tal for IH'«t'd Oitalcwr. HI'IX'S • • t\ I R« Hair Store, 38 & 40 Monnw Cuicaeo. ACiKNTS \VAVn:i> for the Best and Faste«t-8<ai-invr Hetoriitl Hooks and Bibkvs. Mim mluoixi ifi) |»r cent. Katiomal Publishing Co., CHICAGO, 111. AOOftA MONTH--I6CKTS \/ maelllriKartlcleatn the world;I MTnple (yWW'J Addrega J. JL. Broaun, Detroit. Mich. FIVE-TON VMM SHIES SSI All Iran fend Steel, DoabU Brau Tare ft Jnu he p*tb thm (r*l(bt. All alaea aqoally ftr free booh, aUdreas , JUKI OF BIMHAMTOR, jlitfiMiitai, X. T. ALL FARMERS CAN ^ WE DRESS THI8 CARD IN MOURNING, Bocnu'e there are ao many thousand* of oar I wllm mortals aufferinK and iljin* wbo misbt I | be cured by tuing \ | Dr. Sykes' Sure Cure for Ca^rrli." | Ask druggists for it, or write to | .OF*.. O. R. 169 MADISON ST., CHICAGO. ILL, or fnD information, testimonials, ate., | <'ut this oat now, for tkii Cant will | be of vntue to jrmn &,)' Name Uxi« i>ai>er when writing. Make Money ii« H ALL'S Consumption Can Be Cured. DR. WM. FA KMKKS* KFVIKW (weekly), Uie tx'st and cheap­ est Fariuers' pajwr in tlie world (fUV) a yesrl. If you don't believe it. TRY IT and SKIi. Si-nd ei«ht :i-eent ataiupa uud you will tret it till IVivnilR-r ;ii, 1SSJ FAllMlillS' ItEVIKW CO., Cluawo. HI. Hani.ak is not interested in ininirig- opera- ; tions, notwithstaudiu^ he has made bo much money out of his oar Dr. Wnfchelij'b Tebthwo Stkup to Just the medicine for mothers to have in the house for the children. It will cure colds, coughs, sore throat, and refrulate tile bowels. Do uot fail to give it a trial, you will be Sleased with its charming ell'ect. Sold by all rugirista Int.eksoix Bavs that no such man as Noah ever existed. I'he mischief he dldu't. After whom, then, was Noah Webster, the diction- | ary man, namcdY--Sijhui Texim. j Nattual petroleum, deprived of its color and ! disagree able odor without distillatiou and the ! aid ol aeids ur alkalies, is what the (Jarboluic in made from. As uow improved and i>erfected it ( is a beautiful preparation, and perloruis all ' that is claimed for it an a hair restorer. an IV HIHalaWtgiuiPrlwiiiita IHS AULTHAH A TATIOK CO., Mansflald. Obia. (TirS BRAKlf CMX1R .. . ,rl Ffcfi ^ > wwrk. W).| prwt H m* ' . ?.T S*lTtti~ Airt'ft, l alaUM-. IU. •iieieiii SB laiaftTT. rr#f. •A«Tt* I IIU I n Ur«at HpAni^ Hcer, AMveli wil.!, fa? *1 vmx*. wiiii aa4 l*k «t hair, » CORRECT t TCRK«/ Jt<u rutuf^ bai'zf* ar "ft. with mi, I «f mfung, and ^aw xarnfcft. payrbaWf* |Mllf andiMfd. Mm; NUirMJ to *11 Ml iimIm. liiiin "r " -- " * Mma FOR THK LUNGS, ^ This NaTs Singer, $20 ' Cures CMiumpUon, M^JPntamgal ^ withtuct .if • «uza,Rroncliiail)ilfr AltieisBnHiclUtfA ^ \\ithfSM't-or Atta«ument« Yree. i AHtliina. nmnn. Whmwiln^ Warranto*! |-crlt rl i nuuui^ qiiU't.lijimlMHiK' nnddurable. Sent on test trial-plan' wlu-n arsirvil Happy Hm« Or|[nni I 4 KvtH ktu*i' swells, with t:i stool an-1 iil Rnok.onlv S7S. Alj-o wik ihi trst li'liil nl.'in if dr- isiixti. I' l trrtJiT cas*>, mn^tiitlt-ent tono, dui .iliU- insidi and out. Cir­ cular. with rcstim(tnio!s. fiw. Ask G.l'aynt- A- Co. Thin! ri\ < hica^O" nes»_, Anthma, Croup, WluM»i>fzi& ali IMwawaotthe Kr***t:^'I.»cOrirai >, andpewaUu) nompanr It. ContampUvn Is Mt «•>. lncarable mmlady. HAIX'S BALSAM wtKcwS* Ton, even ftwurnprofewlonal »ltl lall*. ••Bnchnpalb«.n Quick, complete cure, all annoying- Kidney, Bladder and Urinary Diseases. #1. Drujr- pist*. Send for pamphlet to E. S. WELLS, Jersey City. N. J. Nonnurt annoys the keeper of a railroad restaurant more than t o have one customer ask in n rather loud tone of another: " Have you ever tried plating war ships with this Wind of sandwichesV Klv«* TIiohhumiI Letter* Have been received by proprietor of tin White Wine of Tar Syrup, from parties claim­ ing1 to be cured of consumption by its use. K curate on e asked a little girl in the Sundav-sc ooi: "Who made your vUe botlvy'^ "Mother made t;-e botlv," qui kly retorted the child; "I only made the skirt" "Mv teeth are full of sand," said the fnir- rst bather in the surf. "All ripit, hind them out," sail 1^1 a.inirer, "anu I'l rinse them < it' foe vou." And now she regards him only as a brother. Unct.e Ram's Condition Powdkks should he used bv every one owninp or having the c:ue of horses, cattle, hogs or poultry. It improves the appetite, promotes the i r RTowtli, and restores the siclL Sold by all druggista " ' " It is said that if a bear is undisturbed he ts as harmless as a woodchuck. \Tiie state­ ment is easy I o prove, in fact e* knows a bear is all right if you don't go too near hiTn.--PWayiuu. The Fruzer Axle Grease received medals at the Centennial, North Carolina State Fair, Pari* Exposition, American Institute, New York, and others. When a man's feelings are so great that he cannot express them, had he better send them by freight? , oIer 'JW.OOO Howe Scales have been sold, and the demand increasing continually. Bor­ den, Selleck & Co., Agents, Chicago, I1L Beauty and bashfulness are often united, Yet the pretest maiden is admired for her cheek. _J w THE CALICRAPHI The On/i/ I'erlert Wriiuuj SliK'luut. The upi>er and lower ra>ie inaehme has ail independent key for every charaeter. Every Ijearitit; in adjustable te wear. Si-nd for cireulare and six^-inienn of work to FA1HITELU (i XAYLOR, corner State and Van Buren 8te.. L'tueaKoUUl. WIII I'NElf Jfi HOI.MES R C A N S 1> «-« l All Otkrrt In Tone and Da- rali llty. lllv-hMt Plr«t I li>»» K«|i uiiitlon. KatablUh^d 15 Year*. Nvml for «atal<icnr of arw itylra. Whitnajr AHolmaaOnranOn.. Qnlm v III. and ARREARS of PAT ti IMO.N M>J.I>IKltS . Reported on KOI.I..S M IIKSKKTIOIO. ACT OF AUGUST Till, 1KIM. Apply to MAGNETIC BOUNTY ACT OF AUGUST MILO B. STEVENS & CO. OFFICES: Tie Droit Buildinir, Washino 1 UN. D. O.; Case Biiildint-'. Clf-vki anI), ouioHAbatriu-t Uuildtlg, Dktkoit, Mk jj. ; Metivpubtan Block. Cuicauo, WELL AUSERS, ~ ROCK DRILLS And Una But Machinkkt la the I WORLD ior •ORINa lid DfllLUNQ WELLS by I Hor«* *r Itiin Pawar I Book Fbb*. Adorcti LOOMIS 4 NVMAN. TIFFIN. OHIO WiSSliDDTlOH Discorm: A6ENTSj«?!W WANTED' SubscripiiopSaokt. titioj^ of a remedy based on Kin-HV theory, a, rational nienuaof Noi HbAe; othtno is uglier than a crooked boot or traighten them with Lyon's Heel Htiff- Sold by Shoe and Hardware Dealers. THE first round danoe originated with Adam when he sat down on a hornet. Better go nt once, voi-.rur man. while you have the time, to IL B. Bryant's Chicago Business Col.egie. Cork) Insoles: What They Dol The Maunetic ItiHolea contain a series of .Matmeta, edentiiH allv arranged, that form tninute batterie-s, re- cliaivniL.' the blood with m.-Hnictimu, and exerting a tranqiuli/.iin: intluenee upon the entire system through ; the consei|in-nt impiwed cin-ulatiou. ! lnnilaU- «lie teet from the eold and damp earth, and ! thu« prevent the abstraction ot the positive force from i the body. ~ , , j Generate by their magnetic action an agreeable I warmth and seeait' lierfeet circulation in the feet and | lower e\treiuitieM. ! Cuti' Chilblains and remove all unnatural heat, per- 1 apiraUou. sw»-llititi of the feet aud ankles. Prevent, relieve, and in some cagea cure rheumatism, i neuralgia ami kindrwl (Unease*. , ! In all forms of ehrouie and nervous disease ana d»- bihtj ur<' invaluable. i Are a (rreat wnnerver and direct promoter of general : health, and <-.m be wi >rn at all seasons of the year: being ! made verv thin, take up very little room in the shoe. ! Om- pair of the Magnetic Insoles will demonstrate I the truth of these claims. Price, *1.00 iicr pair. FU tv thousainl men. women and children ot the city I of Oi'icatro and tlie West are wcJirini' them. The Maimetic Insoles will omviiMi- tlie wearer of the powv mddiUK ill our other Mn»nieti<' Appliances. Bemittanees can lie made in one-cent postage stampa I or currency sent in lett<-r at our risk. Sent bv mail on receipt of price, and the size of shoe • nsuallv worn, by the Magnetic Appliance Co.. 218 State i Street. Cliicag<i, 111., aole manufacturers of Uie United ! ^or full instruction in the new rtagnetic Treatment , for ncrvoiiH and chronic diseases send for the " new i departure" in healing and physical culture, containing i testimonials of the marvelous cures obtained from 1 wearing Magnetic Appliances without the taking of drugs and medicines. ° g discovery of the parasitic nature of was promptly ' followed liv the more linportan:, W-aSSrlRH TRIAL :s o.iei-ed to ail afflicted with symptoms of lung dis- jasc. Ad ress Box 78S, N. Y. City. AGENTS W*HTED THE FINEST IN THE, WORLD, «n.l the •M selilits Accurately wi-iUun.eleaily p: inud on tin* pajwr, elegantly i:lustrated aiul beautifully t*<«;:i<l. _ J##' ether looks tlu-ir equal. A'.l new uik. no eonijietlti Ti i ritoi vi lt'i\r. TIu'v s.iti»ly ;:n' A-r-• p11 ticeauae they fast, the people os account of their value. "Newman's Amerisa." from theWomnl BwlWers to «l«ly w * The onl v book covering the pubjtct, ^ | Ths Lives of the James Brother^. The only eomplete aoeount of tho Mlmmmmrl Oallaw^ "The Jeannaite." E«plnrttUon%« ilictudincp KAlW BIAlEii* HALL and UE LOXGa "notorial Family BIUo."p% s?.; tninlnp: bosh vmlMii of^the %>w T^tlumenl. . IV.ittirra and Illustrations than any otiier edition. Tlie most I.IBI !I4L TEMJK grantiil !'V any V BOLSE. PHOSt'l DE.lLiS-i. BM-H'S. „ . , Writeouickly for circulars audi terms. Temmiy IS. j® •*. laoidly ls-iug Taken. • _ C03UKN & COOK PTOLISHIKQ CO., ^ ... •6, 98, 99 & 100 SSetropoUtan Block, CHICAGO, JIX* FOR or SEW KOO PROPESSIOWA- ^ READY I0W (A 1MSKEU TuS. --v 4 0jUftl«m of btsitlost i tmafka!-k% thniiin^ iml ou* f. >->m privute t-cor«iK. ami WRVKE UEKOKK I'l il- LISHFD Profusely M low in Q| AVQ THF DETECTIVES. pn.v anl M-lls very " ,u )nc . , ..v., rapidly. so»nl i«»r ai*<recirriilaronu special terras.. Aoor'l A. G. NETTI.IITON 4 CO. a. Wi&ri£G»(. IK THK AC&NOULEDCiU) u';u m«W I'liriiittlv*' !*«' I» makf» New Rk.«n Bl<Ntd iin \ wili e mplnt^ly change tho blood in the ent r» t4»m in r*>r»fe months. Any foreon wtio w'll tAk© om piu •ncn i-iK »t m 1 to 12 wenks m «y be re^tiir^d sound b«»lth. il vnch'ii *bwg b« Sold everywhere, or •t'nt by n>Aii for h lettor Hinmpe. I, M. <t CO., tcna^rly i.unyor. Me* Common oolds neglected cause one- half the deaths. Consumption lurkfl In every coutrh often usin? as a mask the ruddy cheek ami pparklinfr eye till its deadly seeds are deeplv planted' in the system. Eilebt's Exthact of Tab and Wild Chebbt will eurelv cure colds, coujrhs, croup, catarrh, bronchial complaints, aud ward off consump­ tion. : , The wife of a Harlem man who is very fond of simrinjr San key's revival hymns has named their baby Fort," bo that he would wunt to hold it. Fob dthpkphia, indigestion, depression of spirits and greneral debility in their various forms; also as a preventive against fever and acne and other intermittent fevers, the ^erro -Phosphorated Elixir of Cplisaya," made by Caswell, Hazard A Co., New York, and sola by all druggists, is the best tonio; and for patients recovering from fever or other sickness It has no equal "I ouess I'U push along," in what the man with the wheelbarrow said. Tx* Um Mir brand. Spring Totwooo. Pabtnkhs in the butcher business are a joint concern TWTTNTY-Font HOICKS TO LIVE. From John Knhn. lAfayetto. Ind., who announo«fl (tut he ix now in "perfect he-slth," we have the follow­ ing : " One year «ko I wain to all al>i>earanoe, iu tlie last stajres of CotiKuiniition. Chir be«t pU.vniclan<( ^ave my cue up. I finally (rot «o low that our doctor said I could >ot live twenty-four hour*. My friends then pnrclmw-d a IwitUe of DR. WM. HALL'S BALSAM FOR THK H'N'< which considerably beuefited me. I con­ tinued until I took nine bottles. I un now in perfect health, having used no other medicine." DR. Di.WITT C. KELLINUER'S LINIMENT in an in­ fallible cure tor Rli<-uniati.<mi, Sprains, Lamenctw and Diwnso* of the bcalp, and for promoting jttie crowth ol the Hair. LEADING AGRICULTHRAI| A27S FA1CL7 KVSSid. OF AKESI5A. It is THE OLDEST and BESTP^' THREE MONTHS FREE? To all Ni 'v SubHcril-etN wo will s»>nd THK PUAIRUt FAHMKK rom uow uiiu^ January 1st. tur or the rt>inii tider of thi- veai |or ill (VllU. Saiuple und I'tvuii.iin Ij-<t - cut irve. Adilr 'att I'KAIltlK FAKMKK I'l*B. t O., Chk« • - > " $10 CORN-HIKERS' SOAP! Designed for Oora-Huskeru and farint-rv, whone h;mdK roughen aud eraok, to kt cp then, ill a smooth hc^Jtliy condition, uaui IP T1|C TIIIC to use it. No farmer should NULF ID IHU I IMC be without it. A*k your Druggist or Grocer to _ _ _ iggist send - or it, or send us 15c.jyid we will forward by mail. Manufactured by the Clinton M'r'o Co., Clinton CL Are You Nervous, and Lfcek Vital { Energy? I In all diseases of a nervou* or muscular type, such ! as Nervous Debility. Paralysis. Overworked Brain, Kx- i haustion, or Loss of Vital K ieryy, We.ak B ick. Kidney ! Disease, mir Mairnetic ISe!t or Iteiienerator is mtule ex- ! nresslv for the cure of ileraiurenientN ot the prtx-rcabve oiKans. Wlienevcr any debility ot the puierative or- I irans oci-urs, from whatever cause, tlie continuous ; Stream of Masrneti^m iiermeatiiw throuiih the parts ! niust restore tliem txi healthy action. Them is no mis- i fake about this appliance. Yearn of use have tested it, and thouKanils of cures are testified to. Weakness from ! Indiscretion, Incapacity, Lack of Vicor, Sterility--in ' tact, anv troubles of these organs is cure<l. Do not con­ found this with electric belts advertised to cure all ills from head to toe. This in for the one sjiecific purpose. ' Price ot Belt, $10. Sent by express upon receipt of price and. if uot lound as represented, money retund- ad In ordering.send measure of waist. Remittance* m be niad* iu currency, sent in letter at our risk. UAUXETON ATPLIANCK COMPANY, 218 State Street. Chicago. INCREASE YOUR CAPITA!* InvMtort of «m*U and "w®! •tnosnti in Grain, Xiuetta m fully protected aa n»t» • utonai ve and infill®utial op«r*tora Our Buccespfui ftillv tried, tebliabsd plan. ITy It. _He*xirt« WHEAT weekiy, dividends " ly. Send at once far explain. <<rj BircularB and past vt cord, i nn Dividends paid during ;>a«ttnirt«e» •yinthi on this fund $06.71 pet Address FLEMMLNQ I _ MVKRIAM, 141 & 1*8 USdW STOCKS St.. Chicaco, 111. . . OiVuiVO 4^ We want a local s$ea4 Ife . every town. .Excellent mdtio* PIAA ments. Good pay to a rcspocjU- hln. entarnriailis ITHJ1. ^4:. • >: £ s'&t* $50 Fine Mustac he and Whiskers in live weeks. Send !£*• for re< ipe; JL iNHPifnotsatisfactory,money refund­ ed. Ad'r'ss Mart-kens, Anderson & Co., Lockridge, Iowa. VflllilO llCki K yon want to ion Telacraphy la • I UUraO RICH f«w months, and b« oart«ln of a •ation. sddrsas VALIlNTINK BROS . JaaMville. Wte. at Sbc OM«t & Bed rilegc. Oirsulwfr®*. .TXiUss, Dubuque, la. NOT FAIL i to sacd for oar fall price llist for 1881 ft-« to lany address upon appli- f eatlon. Contains descrip­ tions of requir­ ed for Personal or Family use. with over MOO OurtraUons. We seli isll goodsst iriioleeale prfcSi to qauitities to sort the purchaser. The only institution who 555b ZmL UU\ TCSO.HKKY WARD A X2t Wakaak Araut llllssli. DO nu with over MOOil Sustratioi MASON ft HAMLIN MUM A |l(l are certainly best, havine been IiIkC A Mm sodecreedatEA K.R\ (ilU^AT unanno wo.km»s lmusiklu. COMPETITION for SIXTKEN" V K V UN. no other AmericanOrvans having been f«mnd at juxv AI«o CHKAFKST. Style ifo: ortaves : surtirient ivm- pass and power, with best ([iKiiity, for acd seotilar music in schools or taniu.v;.-^ at ou.y « ONK HIMMtl ll OIIIKKS^I y ^ #57, *«>«>. »7a, #78. »!».'{, W108, »J 14, to I^JOO and upward. The Uiroer st;,U* are vhoUu unrtr<W%»» any other Organ*. Also tor easy t1- JULlVSTIlATKIJ CATALOG I K HtKK. _ -- -j-kk, Comjiany have commenced Uie m:mutiu ture of 1' I'KIt. IIT (iltAMI 1'IAMIS. intrvHluciug {tupcT'Ula' itHjtrorenietitit, adding to p<iwer and beauty of tone and durability. Will m>! rmjiii/y Qi/'ii'tt t a* much a* other /*l</"'•-• 11-Ll M t r.11 I'lKCIXAKS, with full particulars, t uek. THK MASON *HAM1JUS OlMiAN AMD PIANO CO.. 164 Tremonl St., Boston; fc. 14tb St.. N. York; 149 Wabsjh Ave., thka*o. Ls unfailinc and infall% We iu curing Epiieptw- ., Fib.. Spasms, Couvu|» 5 ions, St. Vitus' l>uiio«j, .UooholiMn.i>pium Fa# in*:. Seminal Weaknony lniiKiteucy. Scroful% and all Nervous aa# Blood Diseases. Tip tieiyymeu. La' Literary Men. chants. Bankers, and all w'nose s 8r employment cause* ervou* FroxtratktQi Irregularities of thft blood, stomach, bowel* or kidneys, or who ra» quire a nerve tonic, ap­ petizer or stimulaat* Samaritwn Nel mil is invaluable. sauds prtH'laim it iiust wonderful vijtorant that ever .aaned the sinking e tem. ItfT For sale Driuqrista. THK. DK. S. A. Kit'IT mono hIojicajl {Sole- lYoprii-tois, St. Joseph, Mo. ORAT'M SPBCIP1U MBMCIMB. V»"' WM "«0SS0SSSS:™12^:' 5 V NXVH FA1CV. TOT inimii irr-- nm. BperaMtor rhea, Iapot«M}, and all Diaeuea that follow aa a i ef Saif- . ja lees nt Maootj. Cbmv 1 4 ssBJfdi atare Grave. UXl'STUATKl) i PIANOS ZTw'lode^ m tbe Back, Dim BEFBRE TAKIR8.0-*»' Tiuot^ matiir Ou AjW. and maay other di U»-n IT or Consumption and a Preaatare Hr"Fu'l particulars in our piiaphle*. which to send free by mail to e»erjr one. wm itM Medicine is sold by ail dru*B'sta at «1 pee paekM^ •ix P'cknt^* to? $5, or w It b« s»n% by oeipt ofclhe money, by adUre«ftui< THE GRAY MEDICINE CO., MFOL* M ^ On ^eoonnt of w• idnjM tfcft 1^4^ law W rappw-; Ute enir cMkiuBeb C.N.O. Mo. 4S. ' *, IIKN WEITliW TO .APT K«tTlKKR% 1/ . pleaM aajr mm.tr Ik* «4tnWhln<l Iks • -

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