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McHenry Plaindealer (McHenry, IL), 18 Mar 1885, p. 6

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" s * . ' • Hart«"< ipwaiair: , istamsfetttkltiffttatcverl kBMr. " ( * YfltlBg, 'twixt me and you, . iWhrnmtt mmi ike me, )rider, ufittadr ami free ... t«pfetlts, «$*fc f»iw?s sa - rd down, rflno a ho m m any In town, . ISiuvaitatr 'cftsssr one child in tea fcetiitc as good as lie might have been. "!niiM«Ur|Oodshowing, it seems to me, TMtOttly alrathof tfaelot g mu d be _ To lor, end tha 's what I sajr Btr mother twenty time# a dav; [tjMUrtamkehersec it in that light, e ItftMM and wait* n;ght a ter night jBoand of his st p, tili I grow so wild [SanostCurM b.th mother and child. OQjrht to "ve for the others, you know, let the tormenting vagabond go follow his ways and take the pai»-- E turn him out and 1 he <•»'s him aga n, •Mkeea hardne ss between her and me, the worst of it is that the children agree I'm in the right. You'd pity h» r then-- times I think I'm the meanest of men. "I've u|aed and scolded and coaxed withoat r Answer Is always: 'My boy has one friend i long as Hire, and your charge is untr e t my heart holds "no equai love for you I all the r *& But the one gone astray j me the most, and you'll find 'tin the way ! ail mothers to bold close to the one i huris tier the most. So Lore's work 1s done.' "•Now what can I say to such words as those? £m not convinced, as the history shows; ut I of eu wonder which one is right, As I hear her 1 ght step rii^ht after night, 9ere and there, to the w.ndow and door, As the waits with a heart that is heavy and 8're. Swish th • boy dead, wbUc she gives her life lo save him irom sin. Tttere'd husband and wife" '"Cardiff Mail. F > SEA-SIDE ROMANCE. "Bat how can I help feeling neglect­ ed and miserable, Ned? Yon scarcely lOok at me when Miss Lovel is near,and •he ia your preferred partner in all filings now. Yon walk with her,you sing with her, yon drive with her, and it Hakes me very wretched." "Now, Mollie, if von're going to be jealous!" "I'm not jealous, Ned. If I thought yon didn't care most for me; if I fan­ cied you oared at all for anyone else, I don't think I'd remonstrate with you at alL I would jnst take off this," touch­ ing the diamond on her hand, "and hand it back to yon. I am not jealous, bnt yon are not very kind to me, Ned." "My little pet, yon do not see things M I see them. One owes something to society, especially when one is at the seaside. If yon would only remember that I love you too well to find fault with anything you can do, and, if you would become a little more of a society character yourself, I would be perfect­ ly happy. Why, you scarcely take the least attention from any one bnt me, and so many are willing to offer atten­ tions to yon. New, dear, kiss me once; I must be off; I am to drive on tne beach with Miss Lovel. Not jealous, my pet?" "Not jealous, Ned, no," and she turned from him, bnt without giving Ike kiss he asked for. "She is jealous, though!" the young fellow thought, smiling as he watched the pretty, straight figure going away front the nook in which he had found ber ovt to the stretch of sand, against winch the waves rolling, receding, leav- » of seaweed on it, now , bearing it away--a very t of sn ocean, now kind and now i always fair in the sunlight. Sed Tremaine hurried away over the bsaefc. whistling as he went, and he !•--U/ gMghtnp with his aflance, n the pretty dress of cream and > with her wide sun-hat pushed a on her blonde head, was ' very beautiful and animated-- and smiling in the face of Lee fctone. fiae most incorrigible male flirt at the beach. "Where now, Tremaine?" the latter called out, as, with a nod, he pursnes las way. "For a drive on the beach; will see you later;" and Ned had gone by re­ suming his whistle. Mr. Stone smiled a little and spoke a fsw words to Mollie. She colored •lightly, followed the tall form of her lover a moment with her eyes, then gave a gracious answer, and half an hour later, when Ned and Miss Lovel net the pretty light carriage on the beach, in which Lee Stone took his daily drive, they received a pleasant nod from pretty Mollie, who was his campanion, and who looked as though •he was thoroughly enjoying his socie- "She certainly lost no time in fol­ lowing; my suggestion," Ned told him­ self, half in surprise; "and she has evi­ dently found the society of Stone any­ thing bnt boring." "What » handsome couple they make," Miss Lovel said, with a certain gleam in her steady gray eyes. Ned colored suddenly; he didn't quite know why. "Perhaps you didn't know that Miss Annes is my promised wife," he said, a "trifle coldly. Oh, but so many engagements are broken in a summer at the seaside, one never minds that very much," the lan- belle said, indifferently. That night there was a "hop at the aotel, and Ned had made up his mind while dressing to be a little more at­ tentive to Mollie; but, to his surprise, be didn't find Mollie Anues shrink­ ing under her mother's wing, as had been her custom. A number of her old friends had arrived while they were at dinner, and they were about her; be­ sides, Lee Stone was quite pronounced in his attentions to her, and while she gave him (Ned) a smile from the dis­ tance he found it quite difficult to get near her; then a light tap on his arm informed him that Miss Lovel was ask­ ing hiin whv he was so preoccupied, snd, as Mollie and Stone went circling Inr joining the waltzers, he followed them with Miss LoveL "A rather pronounced flirtation." liee laughed later, when he and Mollie stood on the hotel terrace watching the moonlight on the sea and strand and cms solitary couple pacing slowly *lonc beside the waters. Both knew •who they were, for a few moments be­ fore they had seen Ned Tremaine place that pale-pink scarf about the should- •«m of Miss Laura Lovel as he led her •matom the terrace, too much engrossed 4m his task, it would seem, to notice lloOie Or her ompauion. "Oh, everybody flirts more or less at ;a seaside hotel, one has nothing else to 'do, you know," Mollie answered Lee, with a light little ripple of laughter, •and he looked down on her pretty face to which the moonlight was so tender, Us voice sinking to almost a whisper as he spoke to her. ,"*Ji js s cowardly pastime for a man," lis said softly, "and lor a woman it is a "And you--is it pleasant to know that you are ornel or oowardly ?" she questioned. "One is tempted to be­ come personal when such remarks come from one who is said to count his conquests with a cruel pride, and to whom the world gives no higher aim than to fascinate, and--remain careless. Am I too plain ? Forgivrf me." "I forgive you freely--as I would for­ give you all things, Miss Anues; bnt neither you nor the world folly under­ stand mis. I may seem a trifler; but, were the woman I love to love me in return no smile would h& to tne so sweet h®r», no prestos half so dear." Mollie had been watching the couple on the sands, going slowly back and forth in the moonlight; now she lifted her sweet young face and looked at him with a sort of wondering pitv. "Do we all wrong you, then ?* she asked, gently. "Have you failed in your wooing? Oan you not win where you love?" His face flushed a little at her words, and she, watching it, was struck by its strength and beauty. How did it chance that she had never noticed either before? "I am not left the chance to woo or win her," he said, slowly; "she is an­ other's promised wife." "Ah," she said, pityingly; and she gave him her hand in a sweet, woman­ ly sympathy, never for an instant con­ necting his words with herself. He lifted the small hand reverently to his lips, and, drawing it through his arm, turned toward the beach. As he did so he found himself facing Ned Tre­ maine and Laura Lovel. who were com­ ing in from the moonlight, and he no­ ticed that the young man's face was quite white, while there was a half- scornful smile on the lips of the fair belle of the seaside. But the two couples passed each other in silence, the one going down to the stretch of glittering saud, the other going in to the dancers. A week later, and Mollie had jttat come in from a long honr, peaceful and calm, spent with Lee in a quiet nook among the rocks that overhung the ocean. He had been reading to her there some of t he sweetest poems given to the world by genius. Her heart had thrilled as he read, and new, strange feelings had stirred it. When he closed the book he had looked up and found her eyes filled with tears. And now in her own room she was asking herself how it was that what she had but com­ menced for the purpose of annoying Ned had in one brief week slain all her old resentment against Miss Lovel and made her thoughts turn constantly, not to Ned Tremaine, who was her affianced husband, but to Lee Stone, who was termed the greatest male flirt on the beach. What was changing in her life? When she .now met Ned and Laura it did not pain her as it used to. Was it because a handsomer face, a stronger and nobler face than Ned's was constantly near, ready to turn to her with devotion, ready to light if she smiled ? A servant broke her ponderings by bringing her two messages--one a bou­ quet of white flowers, with a few feath­ ery sprays of fern among their white­ ness, and one crimson rose gleaming red from their center; and in it was a note from Lee, asking her to' go for a drive with him by moonlight; the other was a few angry lines from Ned, asking if she remembered that she was be­ trothed to him while she allowed every gossip at the hotel to chatter of her flirtation with Lee Stone. "I have been patient, waiting an op­ portunity of speaking to you," he wrote, "but you will not give me one, so I write to ask you if you wish our en­ gagement broken; to all it would seem so." She trembled a little as she read, and her sweet face changed color; but she went to her desk, drew from it every letter he had ever sent her, formed them and his ring in a package and wrote him the following note: "It was I who was tirst taught pa­ tience, while my existence was forgotten for one^yho was what you bade me be­ come -- 'a society character.' Why should I fancy that you wished ah in­ terview with me of late ? It is not so long since you could not spare a mo­ ment for me from Miss Love!. Do I wish our engagement broken? Per­ haps we both wish it, Ned; at least let us break it, since I so displeaso you. I send yon your letters and ring." Then, although a choking sensation was in her throat, she penned a brief note to Lee: "I will be pleased to go with you;" that was all; and in the starlight--the moon rose late--she went with him out over the beach and far along the coun- "V., it strange that he noticed she no longer wore Ned's ring? Was it strange that he told her of his love, and that she listened silently, believ- ingly, with a strange flutter at her heart? Was it Strang that when they drove back, lingering beside the sob­ bing ocean, another ring should deck her finger and another bond should lie upon her life ? Well, two others walked Upon the strand, two whom the gossips called lovers; and yet when it was told that Mollie Annes was to place her happiness in the keeping of "the flirt of the beach," one man who heard it turned white as death and shrank from the eight of the beautiful woman beside him, although men called her fair, and many said she had won him from his faith; vet Mollie was too happy to re­ gret, although she still sometimes re* members.--Philadelphia Call. la Sa- Again she laughed, while arranging Ife teaeelet on iter arm. A touch of Hspftiy wsslnthc rippiing laugh. A Peeatltar Speaking of JUMMoa newspapers re­ minds me of •, something I heard a few days ago with regard to the llluetrated London Folic* known as the "Fenny ZhtadlA* years ago the ain whopromoted the venture was asked to sell by Mr. Pur- kiss, the present proprietor. "Well," he replied, "I owe £80 pound and T want ^50--so FU take £100 for if At th* time Mr. Pnrkfss wns not in­ clined to give so *nnch--ao the matter fell through; but afterward he bought the paper for about £200. Mr. Purkiss worked the paper well from a commer cial point of view, and the circulation --particularly in the provinces-- steadily increased. The blood-eurd- ling pictures on the front page ap peared to hit off the bucolic taste ex­ actly. In two or three years' time one of the various Societies for the Supres sion of Vice or Indecency came to the conclusion that the paper had a very bad effect upon the moral tone of the community, and propose! to buy up and suppress it. In order to ascertain what would be a fair price to pay an ex­ perienced accountant was called in and allowed to spend a fortnight in the of­ fice among the books. He reported to his employers that the concern would be cheap at £35,000 which was more that the society could afford to give That was over ten years ago, and I can only guess what the property is worth now--probably not far from £100,000. It has an enormous circulation in the country districts. In many of the out of-the-way villiagfs the Police News is the only paper to be obtained* for love or money, and among the class which delight in the record of deeds of blood and violence it is quite a Bible. The front page is "drawn" by one man, who is paid £20 per week for the job, and the man who arranges the letter­ press and wields the scissors and paste receives a similar salary. There is not a line of original matter in the whole paper. About 300,000 is the weekly circulation, which yields a princely in­ come from the original outlay of £200 about twelve years ago. But, for sheer impudence in jour­ nalism of the scissors-and-paste order, a* weekly paper called Tit-Bits cer­ tainly bears off the palm. Some genius discovered that English newspapers were very heavy, and that there were hosts of people whe would buy a jour­ nal which did not require much read­ ing and was free from a lot of to-bs- continued-in-our-next stories. He also found that there was a vast amount of amateur literary talent which could be "exploited" for next to nothing. Six­ teen pages of odds and ends, anecdotes, short tails, cuttings from other papers, etc., are served up for one penny. Each week a guinea prize is offered for the best "bit" sent in, the right to publish any or all being reserved. By this means Mr. Newnes, the proprietor and editor, get all his "copy" very cheaply, and at the same time interests a large clientele in his paper, which, ta tell the truth is a mighty poor specimen of a journal. But the concern is a great commercial success, and the sublime impudenee of a man who can get all his "copy" sent him by his readers cannot be too much admired. An average of about 3,000 "bits," more or less origi­ nal, pour in every week. One of these "bits" costs a guinea; the remainder costs nothing. Mr. Newnes and his of­ fice boy cut and paste up the papers, and Mr. Newnes pockets £300 a week net profit from the little venture. Oc­ casionally a bigger prize is given. Six months ago the proprietor offered a house as a prize for the best tale, orig­ inal or selected. A soldier at Canter­ bury came across something interest­ ing in a book he was reading, copied it out, and sent it to Mr. Newnes. It hap­ pened to please that gentleman's crit­ ical literary taste, and the son of Mars became the proud possessor of a seven- roomed house upon the sole condition that he called it Tit-Bits Villa. No less than 34,000 persons competed for the prize. The paper is only a year or two old, and yet there is probably only one other paper in the world, the Paris Petit Journal, which has a larger cir­ culation. Scraps is another big success. It is a kind of an illustrated Tit-Bits, but far better edited. Mr. Henderson, the proprietor, pays for sketches and con­ tributions when used, but only nomi­ nal hums, and, as much of the letter­ press goes into his other papers, the actual cost of production is absurdly small. Scraps has only been out a year. Its circulation is 220,000 per week, and it brings in £200 per week net profit. Mr. Henderson owns Fun­ ny Folks, the Weekly Budget, Young Folks, South London Press, and other journals. He was originally a reporter, and now enjoys an income from all his journalistic ventures which a Duke might envy .--London letter. A Doctor's Diary. A pocket dairy picked up in the strqpt of a neighboring city would seem to indicate, from the following choice extract, that the owner was a medical man: 'Kase 235. Old Misses Boggs. Aint got no bisnis, but has plenty of money. Sickness all a humbug. Oav her sum of my celebrated 'Dipsefloriken,' which she sed she drank like cold tee--which it was too. Must put sumthing in it so make her feel sik and bad. The Old Woman has got the roks."--Sanitari­ an. < " . . . Wakeful Sermons.* ' : A popular minister was asked h'ow ft was possible for him to preach a new sermon every Sunday year after year, and to find something new to say. "Doesn't it give -you a good deal of thought and trouble?" "Oh, no," was reply. "It ip a mere matter of hab­ it. My sermons have never kept me awake five minutes." "Ah!" said the other, "that, then, is probably the rea­ son why they don't keep other people awake either."--Boston Gazette. THE detractor may, and often does pull down others, but he never, as he seems to suppose, elevates himself to their position. The most he can do is maliciously to tear from them the blessings which he cannot himself en­ joy.--Collier. offend "«.>w w» , / US|p||g ;; Society in Leadin g*strings. The American fashions, we used to be told, come from Europe. But wlio makes the fashion there? When all English and French dandies are wear- ing high collars, who is it that turns down his collar with such authority that two continents instantly turn down their collars ? It was answered that the tailors made the changes. The tailors make the clothes, but a change in form or style by the tailor would not change the fashion. If he should change the cut of a coat for a lawyer's clerk the fashion would not change, but the lawyer's clerk would be out of fashion. The tailor as an artist may have the highest taste and the utmost sk 11, and as a tailor he may wish that a new fashion would produce a demand for new clothes. But he has no social authority. He can only serve him who has. It was Prince Hamlet who was the glass of fashion and the mould of form. If D'Orsay, amid universal white cra­ vats, should appear in a black satin scarf, all the dandies would hurry to wear black satin. Tens of thonands of loyal Britons may leave off gloves; but they are merely queer, and gloves are still essential The Prince of Wales may saunter along the streot without gloves, and immediately glove- lessness is the only good "form." This is the secret of fashion. It is the practice of a recognized social leader. The London World says that no instance can-be mentioned of a so­ cial change of fashion introduced by the Prince of Wales which has not been instantly adopted by those around him, and gradually by. the general mass of his future subjects. This is true of dress manners, and social ar­ rangements. "Society," says the World, "cannot organize itself withont the standard of propriety furnished by Marlborough House." It is some prince or other social leader, then, who low­ ered those lofty bulwarks of collars of which grandpa's wedding coat offered so extraordinacy an illustration. It was said that the dropping of a pebble in the ocean j>rodupe4 a moyeî ient whiob wss oontinued to the utqaost con- round Uwjwld. tTttuJnsdouulyeven wsre- publioans are sntyects of a kbg, snd thessvy attK stornful dafiteOffh* authority of ta# Xfcritisli crown deltas it in a 6oat whosn/W" is a doolie ac­ knowledgment of that crown's resist less power. The toflusoce of a sooial leader is shown in nothing so strongly as in his sbility to make two continents weiir clothes out as he chcosos.-- George William Curtis,, in Harper's Magazine. Health and food for School Girls. The breakfast of sohool-girls is the most important meal of the day; not only have they to replace in the blood the nutritive elements which have been assimulated during the night to meet the demands of growth and develop­ ment, but they must provide for the activity of mind and body which their daily tasks imbose upon tkem. It is an old naying that a boy is always hun­ gry ; it is equally true that if a girl is not hungry at least three times a day, she is in some wrong physical cpndi- tion. The unnatural appetites whioh sometimes prevail among girls for pickles, chalk, slate-pencils, and like queer fare, always indicate a perverted state of the system, that should be promptly investigated by the physician. Extremes of obesity and leanness, un­ less they are family characteristics, are indicative of a disturbed physical bal­ ance. Obesity may resnit from an ill- regulated diet, as well as from over­ eating. While superfluous nourish­ ment is stored up in the system in the form of fat, a similar condition may be caused by the undue excess of starch and sugar in the food, so that the ap­ pearance may seem to indicate high health, when, in fact, the needs of the body are imperfectly met. The appe­ tite of girls often incline them to the use of bread and butter and sweets rather than to a mixed diet. The remedy in this case would be an intelligent ex­ planation to them of the need of the system for this mixed diet of meat, veg­ etables, and farinaceous food, the scant use or entire avoidance of tea and cof­ fee, combined with abundant out-door exercise and aotive games, which favor the increase of appetite. Where there is a hereditary tendency to obesity, plenty of exercise should be taken per­ sistently, and the food should consist of the lean meats, poultry, game, red- blooded fish, fruit, and the succulent vegetables. The vegetables which con­ tain an excess of starch and sugar, such as potatoes, beets, parsnips, and car­ rots, should be avoided, together with fresh white bread, pastry, cakes, and sweets in general. All anti-fat reme­ dies should be strictly forbidden, as should every extreme dietetic measure. The drinking of vinegar is almost sui­ cidal. Even the comparatively moder­ ate Banting system should not be fol­ lowed except under a physician's direc­ tion. When leanness accompanies the use of an abundant and varied diet, and the general health is fair, is does not indicate any unfavorable state. On the contrary, the capacity for exercise is increased, and the physical balance is in favor of resistence to disease. When leanness is the result of an at­ tack of illness, of impaired or faulty nutrition, or of overwork, the remedy is to be sought in the use of abundance of digestible and nutritious food tit a va­ ried character, a moderate degree of exercise, and plenty of sleep.--Juliet Corson, in Harper's Bazar. " ' Satire Medical Science in Jnd|fc . Regarding the native treatment of diseases, one of the most curious things 1 ever witnessed was a half-clad native shouting through the streets of a coun­ try town: "Does any one want back his sight?-one rupee only!" as if he were hawking fruits or sweetmeats; and, to my astonishment, a patient soon presented himself to be operated on for cataract. There and then, standing in the bazaar, the itinerant oculist took out his penknife and performed the operation in a few minutes, bound up the man's eyes, and, telling him to keep in the dark for a fortnight', received his fee of one rupee, and shouted his war- cry for more patients. The operation was almost unvaryingly successful; one instance, among my servants being a woman of 80, who had charge of my fowl-house, and had for many a day been sightless, except to distinguish light lrom darkness, and who iu this way was successfully operated upon. Besides this operator are bonesetters and medical rubbers, male and female, especially represented by the heredi­ tary low-caste accoucheuse of each vil­ lage, whose skill in shampooing is such an aid in her lowly calling--as the natives regard it--as to supplant much of the useless medicine and enforced rest of more civilized countries, and save endless mischief and* suffering to her sex. What skill they have is. of course, almost purely traditional. None of the science of the world or British usage has yet altered in the slightest degree either the customs of the native or his horror of the idea of male physi­ cians for women--especially in certain ailments--and their wonder at our obtuseness and disregard of propriety on so delicate a point. To supply a vacancy so long unfilled, lady doctors have now appoared on the scene, who, it is hoped by reaching the zenanas, may reach the real source through which a higher, enlightenment in In­ dia is possible.--Chambers Journal. Couldn't Surrender to a Stretcher- Bearer. On the occasion of the Federal ad­ vance to Stone Kiver, or Murfreesboro, the Confederates drew back to a line of battle. On the retreat a young Con­ federate soldier fell and a heavy rail struck him across the thighs, but he managed to crawl up to two stacks of straw and drag himself between them for concealment. While here he was found by Jack Norris, a stalwart six- footer of the Fifth Kentucky (Federal) Infantry, who had been detailed as stretcher-bearer. Norris repeatedly ordered the young rebel to surrender, and was as often answered by the snap­ ping of a gun, which would not go off. Col. Treanor, hearing the cursing of Norris hurried to the scene, and the young soldier at once said he would surrender to a soldier, but not to an in­ fernal stretcher-bearer. The prisoner was a handsome boy of 16 years, and a nephew of the Confederate Gen. Wood. The large-hearted Yankee Colonel took the boy under his protection, conceived a great liking for him, shared his sweet- potato supper with him, spooned under the same blanket, and bade l"'"* "good­ bye" at last with regret. This incident illustrates soldierly pride, and brings to recollection the many amenities between soldiers on different sides, which had a tendency to soften the asperities of war into* questions of patriotic duty.--Southern Bivouac. : THE family and friends oi the drunk­ ard should be protected from the shams and dangers of his drunkenness. About forty years sgossveral haulers weta employed in carrying pig-iron from BrymbotoQueen's terry. Among the number was one WilHsm Griffiths, who is still alive. This man, when go­ ing down Tinkersdale one day with his load of iron, was accosted by a strang­ er, who chatted freely with ' Mm Among other questions, the stranger asked how much he got per ton for car­ rying the iron. "Six and six potice," said th® carter. Toiglit ha?o Eon on the cart?" "About a ton and a alf." "And what do you pay for gates?" "Eighteen pence.'* "Thirteen shillings a week." "How are you going to pet up this hill?" asked the Btranger. "Oh, I mun get me shuder, and push up here." "I'll help you a bit," said he, and at onoe put his shoulder to the cart, and pushed up the hill well. When they reached the top the hauler said, "You an' me's been as good as a chain horse." "Well, well," said the stranger, "don't know how the horses legs are, but mine ache very much in­ deed. I suppose you can manage now?" "Yes, thank you," said tne hauler, and, wishing him good-day, they separated. As soon as the stranger was gone, a tradesman asked Griffiths if he knew whu had been helping him. "No," said he, "he's a perfect stranger tome." "That was Mr. Gladstone," said the tradesman. "Mr. Gladstone," responded the hauler; "I dun know what he'll think o' me, then, for I never sir'd him, nor nothin', I thought he was some farmer." < Northrop, like most other important villages, has its carrier. This man visits Chester once or twice a week, and carries all manner of goods for the inhabitants of the districts through which he passes. On one occasion he brought a barrel of beer from Chester for a farmer living in Moor Lane, the entrance to which is close to one of Mr. Gladstone's lodges. Arriving at this spot, he stopped his horse, and was wondering how he could manage to get the barrel lowered, for he was to leave it by the lodge, as the farmer had agreed to fetch it from there himself. At that moment up came Mr.- Glad­ stone, with his axe upon his shoulder. "Hey, old comrade," said he, "come and give us a hand with this barrel." Without any hesitation the Premier, assisted him to lower it to the ground. Now, old fellow," said the carrier, "if thou'U come up into the village I'll pay for a pint of the best for thee." "No, thank you. You are welcome to my assistance," said Mr. Gladstone, and walked away toward the Castle, smil­ ing. A villager, who was standing a little way off, then came up to the car­ rier and asked him if he knew who had been helping him. "No," was the re­ ply. "Why," said the villager, "that was Mr. Gladstone!" "What a fool I be," said the carrier; "but he's a good old chap. He helped me, and thou knows he done it so willing like." Mr. Gladstone on one occasion visited one of his tenants with a bundle of comic papers under his arm, in which he and Mr. Disraeli were severely car­ icatured. Handing them to the tenant, he roguishly said, "Here I am, what do you think of me and my friend?" At the Hawarden Flower Show of 1884 the Premier was seen arming about the Castle grounds, where the show is annually held, a fat old carrier woman, whom he humorously intro­ duced to the visitors as "Lady Mar­ garet." This notable personage, Mar­ garet Hughes, the carrier woman, was at one of the feasts given in honor of Mr. W. H. Gladstone's marriage, and; as is usual at such gatherings, toasts were introduced. It fell to Margaret's lot to propose the Premier's health. Springing to her feet, she, in very homely, ye| appropriate terms, made her proposition. Mr. Gladstone, re­ sponding, thanked them all for their good wishes, more especially "Lady Margaret," as he called her, the men­ tion of which caused roars of laughter. The title has clung to her from that day to this, and letters are often ad­ dressed to her bearing that title. On one occasion she said to the Premier: Oh, sir, why do you not come and live with us always, where everybody thinks so much of you, instead of going up to London, and bothering yourself with those fellows who will never let you alone? Why not settle down herein your beautiful house and enjoy your­ self?" "Well." said Mr. Gladstone, let me put you a question. Why should you not sell your horse and cart, and give up troubling yourself about this going to and from Chester?" "Eh, but," she answered, "that is my work, and I think if I gave it up I should die." And the other." said Mr. Gladstone, is my work, and I must do it the best way I can." Mrs. Gladstone was going for a walk. She had got a short distance from the castle when a party of visitors met her. I say, is the old gentleman at home?" said one of them. "Yes," said Mrs. Gladstone. "We want to see him," said he. "Follow me," washer reply. "I'll take you to him." She led the way to the front door, and called out, "William you're wanted." "By golly," whispered one of them, "she must be his wiisî * Lonilori Echo. f « « What It Costs to Smoke. One of our highly respected and wealthy citizens, now over 80 years of age, has made an interesting calcula­ tion as to the cost of the cigars he has moked during his life time. He be- ?an to smoke when quite young, and 3as always used tho very best quality of cigars. The period of his smoking covers sixty-seven years. He knows the amount he has expended, and cal­ culated the sum invested in cigars every six months, and placing it at com­ pound interest at 6 per cent., on the jasis of the savings bank calculations, he. finds that the total Bum now amounts to $200,000. It seems like au enormous sum to have been wasted in smoke. But the gentleman, who* has been a successful business manager and methodical in keeping his accounts, spent a good many hours in making up this cigar account, and he is satisfied that the sum of $200,000, including the interest compounded once in six months, is correct.--Hartford Times. The Lazzaroiii Life. The great misfortune, of an Italian citizen of the middle class is that lie is a man of few wants. The lazzaroni in­ stinct runs throughout the whole race. Hoone will do a job to earn 7d. so long as he can keep soul and body together by a job of (id. The cheapness of all that constitutes life, espeqialty in a, second-rate Italian city, is 6Qtaelliing' portentious. Men still living may re­ member the time when this stipend of a professor at some of the minor uni­ versities--Parma, Modfena, Ferr£fra,eto., was 1,000 or even 950 lire (£40 or £38 a year. With nothing besides such scanty means, a man sometimes con­ trived to bring up a huge family.--- American Home. *1 observe, sir, you yourself hardly ever oome near a fire, and never sit by one." "It is beoause Intfrer feel ooldwhen I am well. Bnt men ̂are differently constituted; there are wSrm-blooded men and cold-blooded men, but I ques­ tion if the latter do much good to their constitutions by placing their feet so often on a cosey fender. Can you be­ lieve that more colds are caught at the fireside than in walking out of doors, even in tho night airt--another bug­ bear, by the way.*' "I can," replied my friend; "I can understand that it does not stand to reason to have one-half of the body exposed to the heat and the other not." "True ; let old people sit calmly by the fireside as long as they please, but let them have high-backed chairs, and a pillow behind them to protect the loins as well. And when they go out, let them wrap up well, unless they can walk fast. Let them, and let every one else, for the matter of that, learn to breathe only through the nostrils, and the air they inhale will never give them oatarrh, be it the stormiest day in winter. "Look upon cold, a certain degree of it, as a friend, and you can make it so; treat it as a bugbear, and it will be­ come your constant enemy. v "Cold, as a bugbear, causes people to shut up every nook and cranny of their bed-rooms at night, so that long before morning they are breathing their own exhaled carbonic acid; no Wonder they are heavy-headed and tired of a morn­ ing, and dawdle long over a meagre breakfast, trying to eat. "Cold, as a bugbear, causes people to over-crowd their beds with woolen stuffs, blankets, and such-like. The bedclothing, even for old people, should be light, though warm. There is nothing better than eiderdown, when you can get it. The night dresses of old people should be comfortable, and especially should they be warm be­ tween the shoulders; that is the place which coH likes, as a foe, to assail, just about three in the morning, when the morsel of fire has got low or gone out. Let them beware of it 1 "Cojd, as a bugbear, plays much mis­ chief in ^ the nursery^ Thousands of children in this country are coddled to death, and many actually stifled in bed. They call it being overlaid; it is being smothered. That is the right name for it" "But children must be kept warm?" "Bless their innocence! yes. The bed as soft as down, the clothes as soft as soft can be, but smooth withal, with­ out any tendency to rumple up, or cover mouth or face. The room, too, should be moderately warm; no more, I pray you; and the air ought to be as puife and sweet as the odor of rostis. Is it BO in most nurseries ? Nay, for your bugbear, cold, steps in and seals doors and windows. No wonder that when baby wakes up it is peevish and fret­ ful. 'Young men wear double the weight of clothing on a winter's day that they ought to. They sweat themselves in consequence, so cold, the foe, steps in nnd ends many a life. Top coats, in my opinion, should never be worn, except while riding by rail, or driving or when standing about in a draught; then they cannot bo too thick and cosy. If worn at all when walking, they should be very thin. Very light waterproofs should be worn when walking in winter, worn over the arm, I mean, and never put on the back except when it is rain­ ing. But the warmer the socks the better, and the shoes sl\ould be moder­ ately strong and thick for many an ail­ ment is caught from standing about on damp, cold ground. "Damp is much more to be dreaded than cold, but even this should not be made a bugbear of; I would rather have damp inner clothing than a damp coat; the underclothing, indeed,of every one who perspires freely and easily is seldom, if ever, free from damp. When I was newly married, the little woman who owns me, used to air my handker­ chiefs, my newspaper, and my table- napkin. She knows better now. But preserve me and you and every one from sleeping in a damp bed 1 "The bugbear cold does much harm to many a man on a winter's day, by frightening him to take refuge against it in various stimulants. It cannot be too widely known that these never did and never can keep up the animal heat. There may be times when, if judicious­ ly administered, and in moderate quan­ tity, a vinous stimulant does good." "Example, sir?" "If one is cold and wet even to the extent of a rigor, or if one has fallen into the water, or after, not during, great fatigue; but in ordinary cases the imbibition of a stimulant on a cold day causes but a momentary glow, and even that is a false one; some excite­ ment of brain to be followed soon by nervous reaction, by depression a^pd chilling of the blood" "In defending the fortress of life, then, it is wise not to make a bug­ bear of cold, far better to treat it as a friend than a foe."--An English Fam­ ily Doctor, in Cass ell's Magazine. 1 Where There is No Music. ,j It has often been remarked that there is no music in nature's solitudes of ice. Mr. W. H. Gilder, who accompanied the Bledge expedition of 1879 through Great Fish Kiver and Hayes Kiver re­ gions, alluded with some feeling to the one little scrap of living song that he met there, and the struggle it cost him to lay hands on the onlr specimen of Arctic creature that has a tuneful voice. I shot two of an apparently distinct i-pecies of snipe (he says), to preserve their skins for the Smithsonian Insti­ tution Collection. One of them was distinguished by a sweet, simple song, somewhat similar to the lark's, its Sil­ very tones gushing forth as if in per­ fect ecstacy of enjoyment of sunshine and air; at the same time rising and poising itself upon its wings. It seemed almost inhuman to kill the sweet little ; ongstress, particularly as it was the only creature I saw in the Arctic that uttered a pleasant note. All other sounds were such as the screams of the hawk and the gull, the quack of the duck, the yell of the wolf, the "ooff," "ooff !" of the walrus, or the bark of the seal--all harsh and unme- iodious, save the tones of this sweet little singer. Nothing but starvation or scientific researches could justify the slaughter of one of the-se innocents. I believe I shut my eyes when I pulled the trigger of my gun, and I know my heart gave a regretful thump when I heard the thud of its poor bleeding body on the ground.-- 'Sphw.Qika's Search. A NF.WBURG woman seceived $4,000 for a broken rib. and her husband has figured up that at this rate she is worth about $816,000. . THE bridal gift of a California man to his daughter was a spirited horse, in the first riding of which she was thrown and killed. j. ty i tW canny--the f*al " ̂ A BAD jury in THE beau monds--Ibe swiuMf/ fDr Id. THOUGH an undertaker msy Mvsr gamble he profits by the die*.--Stem* V Sifting*. THE present weather tells the farmer who has stsacs to shed to shed them now.--Somerville Journal. "WHEM were you born, little girl?" as^ed a jpliilMiikfopist of a street bog- gar. *1 m not syro, the reply, • bat I've often heard my ma say that I was born in poverty."--Scissors. PALMISTRY is socially popular. It is very essy to learn. A small, soft, baby­ like hand without a prick of a needle or the faintest suggestion of a steam burn is a sign that the fair owner will not be worth 3 cents as a wife. A PATENT medicine advertisement speaks of "the liver failing to act." We suspect the manager cut down its sal­ ary. When the liver refuses to act, the drama of "Life" can't go on very suc­ cessfully.--Norristown Herald. "OHE of the ladies has dropped her handkerchief," said aWoung. man, who had been admitted behind the eoenea for the first time, tothe stage-manager. "2' dear, no," replied that functionary. 'That is only one of the ballet-dancers' skirts. They sometimes drop o£" ,, A DAW SEXSAVKMT. Her ch-eks are flushed, her eyes are wefciyNi She heaves a gent e sigh. ' < ha!,r Is mussed, «ho toaree knows What I best--to lautrh or ery. /*,'•" wjjat makes her blush anrt tremble SO _J*Uh mingled joy nn I Iright? , J The first time in his life her beau Has kissel her sweet good-night; t --Boston Journal. To BE forewarned is to be forearmed; That's why a Somerville girl needlessly frightened her lover, as they were sit­ ting in one arm-chair and the gloam­ ing, by warning him that her father was coming. She thought that if he was four-armed she could get a more comprehensive hqg. "How MUCH do I owe you now.?" asked the customer of the milkman, as lie emptied the lacteal fluid into the man's pail. "For twelve quarts," answered the pump-handle agitator with emo­ tion. "Twelve quarts, eh? Well, just chalk this one, too." "O, no," replied the man of measure, forgetting himself; "it won't stand chalking any more." "THERE'S something I want you to read," said Fogg, laying down the pa­ per. "It's from my wife. But don't criticise the orthografy, please. Fact is, Mrs. Fogg was a school-teacher for a good many years, and therefore she never learned to spell. She always had the spelling-book when she was hearing her class. But it comes rather awakward for her now when she comes to write a letter." THE head of a large manufacturing establishment in Cincinnati lately paid a visit to Birmingham, Alabama, to see if he could better himself by a change Of location. He found a site to plesse him, but the land was held at such a stiff figure that he was discouraged. "Well, I have got to have coal and iron as well as a site," was the reply. "Coal! Iron! Here, boys (to a couple of sons), run over the place and discover two or three coal and iron mines for this gen­ tleman! I caculated to throw in at least two good mines with the site, el / course!"--Wall Street News. WHILE digging a well in Boflie, Georgia, a workman found, at the depth of sixty-four feet down in the bowels of the earth, a petrified oyster. A legend exists to the effect that a church-supper in Borne twenty-five years ago was almost a failure on ac­ count of its oyster escaping from a back window and taking to the woods. It is supposed that this petrified bivalte is the missing oyster. We suspect It was recognized by a mole between its# shoulder-blades. The oyster must have been terribly frightened to bur­ row so deep into the earth.--Norris­ town Herald. WON'T be heard from--"Tee, my friends, yes!" he thundered, as hie waved his arms around and grew red in the face. "These railroads are the leeches of the land! They are sucking the life-blood of industry 1 If elected to the Legislature, my first, and last, and greatest effort shall be directed to putting the harness on this rampant racer of monopoly!" He was elected. He started for the Capital, and a crowd was at the depot to cheer him off. "Yes, my friends, we will humble this monopoly!" he said from the rear plat­ form; and after taking a seat in the car he got his railroad pass ready to show to the inductor.--Walt Str&t' News. ^ OH, JULY--D1S LONG TIMBt (Putnam County, Ga., 1858.) Mr. Coon, Mr. Coon, lie rack mighty fag!, Mr. Coon, Mr. Coon, he 8 Ip froo Oo grass-->, , En yit Mr. Coon, frits kotcii at 'as'! Oh, Julyl Dis lonff time! - > 4 Ills long time! Oil, Juy! < Oh. Ju y! Dis long time! Dis strong time! Oh, July! Mr. Rabbit Mr. Rabbit, lie ran and 8qaot| He lit ho foot nk de trron'm ghty hot-- • En y t Mr. Rabbit lan's safe n de pat, Oh, July! Dis strong time! Dis strong time! Oh, July! Oh, July! M ghty iong t met Mighty longtime! Oh, Juiji- &je3 Mr. Fox Mr. Fox, ho git over groiflPi ; He run cross ways en he run all 'tf&un'-- • En ylt Mr. Fox will bo run down! Oh, July! Dis long time! . , Ds longtime! Oh, July! Oti, July! Dis wrong time! Dis wrong time! Oh, July! •- Mr. Mink, Mr. Mink, lie slicker dan sin, He make 'im u hole en den he s in In-- BnyltMr. Mink will losa he skin! " Ob. July! Miglity wrong tinwrl Mighty wrong time! Oh. Juljrl Oh, July! Mighty longtime! Mighty long time! Oh, Jiilyli j ; i --Joel Chandler Harris, in (JenturU' t Pious Father Pulls in the A pious father on the West Side en­ tered a Clark street saloon, and to hiS infinite surprise and unspeakable mor­ tification discovered his only son seated at a card-table indulging in the wicked game of eucher. He bounced the youth unceremoniously; then looking at the vacant chair at the table he noted that his heir left a promising hand, and so he sat right down and finished it and raked in the pot. This » virtue rewarded.--San Francises^ \' Argonaut. . OP the two Alexander Dumases,pere et fils, Edmund Yates tells the story that wheu the first successful novel of the son appeared, the older wrote to * , his son, as though to a stranger, con­ gratulating him on his book, and ad­ ding that he ought to know something about difficulties of novel-writing, as he had himself been guilty of several.! Alexander fils replied in the same spirit, thanking his correspondent for his congratulations, of which he felt especially proud, as coming from eSO of whom he had often heard his father speak in the highest terms. * THE more recent excavations at Poqi- ^ peii have revealed painted wall decor^« tions indicating that the Pompeiiaitp were a very bad lot , ,,,, > EVERY county in Washington TAND^ tory, where women vote, gave a majo#- *' ty in favor of taxing church property. ^ RHODE ISLAND is now the only State with two capitals. : • it'K I . . • . . » . •

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