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by* i ,v 8'-, - •• - S'V : ir - f.,- ' u iililft ;S£j 1Gtm Story of Whjr Ha JoiMd Ua Mkd V/ Why He Ldt t« * I I t h a v i n g b e o o m e n o i s e d a b o u t t h a t ,.i "Ire were going to make a horseback trip through a portion of the cattle country, Various individuals made applications "lor situations. We needed only a cook •nd a man to take charge of the bag­ gage, but the applicants kept coming, and the day before we left a chap ap­ peared who introdnoed himself as Awful jPavis. : • "Look-a-here, fellers," he began in a • Easiness way, "I want to be counted in - #n this. Indeed, it's a slight on me that Jon hadn't applied for my services. 'oH'd have been in a pturty pickle to - .|iave gone without the undersigned." ^ * "When asked to explain what peculiar '• Tabic his services might have to us he > ;l|ttered a long whistle of surprise and leplied: "Well, von are innocents and no mis- lake. "Who's going to do your fighting . for you?" , As the Indians were at peaoe we didn't •'ittpect any trouble. ^ ;i "Oh ! you don't! Bless me, but what 9ear, good little boys! Injuns! No­ body said Injuns. It's the white men you've got to look out for. You're going among the tuffest lot in the whole world. Jfhey are right on the fight all day and all night. Any one of the gangcan turn - llimeelf loose and hammer Halifax out • of the whole Ave of you in ten minutes." ; £ He wanted to go along to do our fight- fog. He would furnish bis own mule And make the trip for a dollar a day and - Bis keep. "When asked if he had any Recommends he put on an injured air ,,|j|ad answered: "And you never heard of Awful Davis! Kever heard of the man who has fit fifty -six fights and come out on top f very time! Purtend that you want a (Certificate of character from a fellar who lights standing, kneeling, or lying on ; . lis back! This makes me weary!" *'.7 • . "We talked it over and finally engaged - ftum, and when informed of the fact he feplied: « ' - "Very well, gentlemen. From this v Jboment you are in my keeping. Just ^ |>int out the kuss you want pulverized, - and I'll do the business. I sha'nt put s limit on you. I'm to fight day or , • " flight, and to liok six men a day for the text week I Bhould feel obliged, as my ver is a leetle torpid, and I want ex- % frcise," 'f During the first day's ride we met but '<•"*[ lew people. One of these was an old • V • Indian, lame in the left leg, and Awful Jpavis halted the party and observed: ;> , "Gents, did I hear any of you tell me ;* ' |o liok this copper reptile?" )4;l I" T None of us hsid told him go. * "I beg your pordon, gents, t Witot . you to understand that I'm alius on > land. I'd like to git down and hammer <y . Jiim for the benefit of my liver; but of f « bourse I'm under orders." •\ ' We had pitched camp and were wait- f°r supper when a cowboy rode up. " -IThe greetings were friendly, and he got • k, |own to have a bite with us. He was jhardly on the ground before he saw our Awful fighter, and uttered a humph! of -XT. -- ~4lisgust. "What you got thar?" he asked. "He's our fighter." "Tour fighter! Did you bring him along to fight anybody or anything ?" "He hired to us to do our fighting, but.he's had no show yet." ^ "Well, IH give him a show! ComS out o' that you cowartly kyote!" ;; t - The Awful was skulking behind the gage. He rose up at the command, (1 the cowboy shouted at him: Bill Wheeson, I know ye, and I owe e one! Come out here and earn yer , "Is that you, Jim Phillips?" queried our Awful, as he advanced a step. "Of course it's me, you valler cur from the bottom lands!" "And you want to fights "I want to show these 'ere gents that you 'ar the biggest liar and coward in America! Come out here!" "Gents, is it your wish that I projuce a funeral here ?" qpked the Awful, as he turned to us; "shall I bang his feechura into one bloody mass--kill him deader'n a beef bone with one blow ?" We answered that it was. "Here--tie one hand behind me--tie both hands behind me--tie my feet to­ gether, and 111 lick him then!" howled the cowboy. "Jim Phillips, you havn't got too minits to exist?" solemnly announoed the Awful. "I'm oomin' fur ye like a dozen cyclones biled into one! Look eat, now!" He spit on his hands and stepped back, as if to get a running start, and next thing we heard was the thump! thump! of his feet as he fled afar into the dark- - ness. Some time during the night he returned for his mule. Next morning we found the following explanation scrawled on a piece of paper and stuck into split stick: " Seezed with a sudden yillness--good bi." Salaries of Rulers, The sole income of the President of the United States from the public treas­ ury is his salary of $50,000 a year. Ex­ perience has shown that the present sum is large enough to cover the ex­ penses of the most extravigant house­ holds, and to leave a comfortable bal­ ance in the purse of a Presidential family of moderate ideas. Yet there is not another magistrate at the head of any people exceeding the number of 10,000,000 who does not receive a larger salary than the august, potent, and toiling President of the United States. The Shall of Persia, who has nothing to do but to boss several hun­ dred wives, is in the enjoyment of an income of $30,000,000 a year. Then there is the Czar of Bussia, whose chief duty is to keep from being blown up. He is paid something like $10,000,000 yearly. The dignified King of Siam gets along with a like sum. The royal family of poor, miserable Spain receive $3,900,000 every year, and Italians sleep out of floors and eat nothing but macaroni to make up a purse of $3,000,000 and more for their royalties. Such figures as these con­ sole the British people somewhat for their annual outlay, under specific laws, of $2,915,000 on "Victoria and her brood, to say nothing of indirect extortions and perquisites. The reformed pirate of the seas, the Sultan of Morocco, is slightly compen­ sated for his self-denial by an annual . allowance of $2,500,000, and the Mikado of Japan receives $2,300,000. The im­ potent royalty of Egypt draws $1,575,- . 000 from the substance of that tax-rid- - din land, while the Hohenzollerns con- tent themselves with a yearly tribute of $1,125,000 from the Prussian Empire." Even the Sultan of cotton-clouted Zau- , zibar pockets $1,000,000 a year, and $700,000 are wrung from the Saxons of \ Saxony, no more considerable a com­ munity than Illinois in population or Massachusetts in geographical area, the gang, reigning duke ana jus purpiea [. Portugal, Sweden, and Bnutil his purpled each idom Kings. With fewer peopl than live in some New York wards, and with only two- thirds of Rhode Island's area, the pretty Princelings of Schwardsburg-Sonder- shausen are paid $150,000. On the other hand, the republic of France allows her chief magistrate only $200,- 000, but naked little Hayti gives her presidential firowd $240,000 a year. Switzerland's President comes the low­ est of all the nations of the earth. His salary is $3,000 a year. The wholly use­ less Governor General of Canada re­ ceives $50,000, and so also does the Goovernor General of Victoria, while the like functionary in Tmlia. baa $200- 000. Applied Science and the Agriculture «f the Fotnre. The average yield of wheat in the United States is about twelve bushels per acre. It is commonly sown with a drill, which deposits the seed in rows eight inches apart; eight rows are com­ monly planted at each turn; an average of one and a half bushels of «eed is used per acre; one man with team will plant eight acres per day, and this being done in September, the field has no further attention until the reaper is put in the following July io gather whatever har­ vest Providence has seen fit to send as a reward for the negligence of the hus­ bandman. Prof. Blount, of the Colorado Agri­ cultural College, having first made an elaborate study of the habits and needs of the wheat plant, conducted a series of experiments in its cultivation with the following results: First he planted upon an exact square acre seven and one-half pounds of hand- picked wheat in rows of eighteen inches apart, and at harvest threshed out sixty-seven bushels; again, upon one- fourth of an acre he planted thirty-two ounces of selected seed, and the prod­ uct was eighteen bushels; and again, upon seventy-six square feet he planted seventy-six kernels of extra fine seed, weighing forty-five grains, and the prod­ uct was ten and one-half pounds, or nearly at the rate of one hundred bush­ els per acre. These results are not more remarka­ ble in the excessive yield from a given area than in regard to the yield from a given portion of seed. Agricultural discussion too often directs attention to a result without sufficiently analyzing the means by which it is obtained. A pertinent feature of these experiments is the saving of an amount of seed which, averaged upon the entire grain acreage, would add annually a vast sum to the wealth of the nation. If we should throw into the sea annually 50,000,000 bushels of wheat and a proportionate amount of the other cereals, the world would cry out at our improvi­ dence. Yet if Prof. Blount's conclu­ sions are correct--and they are sup­ ported by much collateral evidence-- we bury this amount in the ground where it is not only thrown away, but where it actually decreases the resul­ tant crop. • The economic results that would fol­ low if we should be able to increase our production even approximately to the above ratio are too lar-reaching for the scope of this article. Our ability to sustain an> almost limitless increase of population would be assured. It may be that over-production would recoil upon ourselves, but we have already successfully encountered the lowest wheat markets of the globe, and as in­ creased production would mean de­ creased cost, we might eventually be able to make good oqr boast of "feeding the world." With a population increasing at the rate of 25 per cent, with every decade, it is hardly probable that our produc­ tion (after the final occupancy of all the public lands) will at the best more than keep pace with its needs. As before suggested, a most progressive develop­ ment will be required if we even ac­ complish that.--James K. Reeve, in Harper's Magazine. A Story of Henry Clay. A lady whose father was a United States Senator in the time of Henry Clay, tells a pleasing incident of that great statesman's kindness of heart, and of the winning way he had with •child­ ren, who felt themselves irresistibly drawn toward him. The lady was then a girl of about thirteen years and was staying at the hotel in which Mr. Clay had rooms in Washington. Her father and Mr. Clay were opposed to each other politically, and the little girl supposed that they must naturally despise each other per­ sonally. Accordingly, she took delight in saying childish unkind things about Mr. Clay. She learned many of the doggerel rhymes of which every political cam­ paign is prolific, rhymes in which can­ didates for office are held up to ridicule. These songs she sang spitefully in the presence of her young associates who were friendly to Mr. Clay. What was, therefore, her amazement when her father came walking into their little hotel parlor one evening arm in arm with Mr. -Clay. "My dear," he said to her, 'this is Mr. Clav." ^1 am always glad to make friends with the children," said Mr. Clay, as he took his unknown enemy by the hands, and sat down by her side. Her father was called from the room for a few minutes, and during that time Mr. Clay completely won his enemy over by his kindness and charm of man ner, and when he left her to talk to her father she watched him with adoring eyes. Then her conscience suddenly smote her, as she recalled all the unkind things she had said about Mr. Clay, who was now to her the personification of all that was good and great. She recalled those doggerel lines with shame and regret. Being a very, con­ scientious little girl, she felt that she must make all the reparation within her power for what she felt was a great wrong: She therefore followed him into the hall wlie# he went away, and, going shyly and tearfully forward said: "Mr. Clay--I--I--" He turned around and said kindly, "Well, my dear, what is it?" "Why--I--I've been a very--very-- naughty girl, indeed. I--I've said awful things about--about you, but I'll never, never say them agaim!" and she began to weep, while Mr. Clay said; "And what have you said?" "Oh--I've sung dreadful songs about you--that awful one that says: O Henrv Clay , You'd better go home, » And there you'd better stay. "And--" Tears choked her utterance, and to her surprise, Mr. Clay instead of smit­ ing her to the ground, bursl into laugh­ ter. From that day to the end of his life, the penitent offender, and Mr. Clay were the Warmest friends. A VBlqwrigaTe. N»wr a Mm of faihta --Hi* Krbnlui of m fttoctll. In the society of London Mr. Bright was a unique figure, says a London letter from Gov. Smalley to the New York Tribune. Needless to say he never was a man of fashion. There was a long period during which the world of fashion held aloof from him. It end­ ed before he became a cabinet minis­ ter and privy councilor. The Tribune of the People, as some of his friends used to call him, had ceased to be thought dangerous by the classes. He was asked often to ail sorts of houses and to all sorts of entertainments. While breakfasts were the fashion he went to breakfasts. He was not often, I think, to be seen at parties, but dined out rather frequently. His curiosity about the great world came late in life, but it came. He had a curious exacti­ tude, and when-he was asked to dinner --as years ago was the custom--for 7:45, used to arrive at 7:45, while his hostess was putting the last touches to her toilet. His habit had this advantage, that he could hear the names of the guests as they were announced at the door of the drawing-room. If he did not hear or if anyone came in whom he' did not know he used to interrogate the friend nearest, him, eagerly: "Who is that!" And if he failed to recognize the .name, "Who is she? Tell me some­ thing about her." To mere conven- tionalties he paid but scant respect. It was his habit to wear a black velvet waistcoat long after other people had ceased to wear them. I can not remem­ ber ever to have seen one in London except his. It did not matter what he wore. There was no truer gentleman in the company--a phrase which is de-4 testable, but has a meaning not easy to express briefly otherwise. There was no courtlier personage than this Quaker none whose manners were more perfect. He preserved his seriousness of thought in the most frivolous society. Nobody had more humor or lightness in hand, but if the subject was serious or interested him deeply he said his say seriously, or, as in the story I am going to tell you, bore his testimony un­ flinchingly. In the days of Mr. Gla<] - stone's earlier unpopularity--for society had prejudices against him long before he took home rule in hand--Mr. Bright was once dining at the same table with a certain princess. Her royal highness made a remark disparaging to thrt liberal leader. Mr. Bright turned to her gravely. "May I ask you, ma'am, have you any children ?" "Yes; why do you ask?" "Let me beg of you ma'am, to tab.; them at the first opportunity where they may see Mr. Gladstone. When they see him say to them that he is the Englishman whom God has permitted to do greater service to his own country than almost any other in his time." Too Contented by Far. Perhaps the occupation of the travel­ ing clock-mender is not entirely gone; at any rate he is seen far less frequently than he used to be seeking a job in country regions. One such wandering mechanic says that, by the aid of a per­ suasive tongue, he coul^Aisually obtain permission to exercise his skill. In one case, however, the owner of the patient proved to be so well satisfied with a bad time-keeper that she remained quite ob­ durate to his eloquence. She waB a placid-looking old lady, and she sat paring apples in her kitchen when the clock-mender arrived. "Why, ma'am," said he in a shocked tone, as he stepped up to the open door, "did you know your clock was wrong?" "Oh, yes," said she, pleasantly, glanc­ ing up at its deceptive face. "It al'ayt gains an hour or so in the mornin'." "Now, how lucky it is I happened to come along this way! I can fix that clock for you double quick." "No, I guess I won't have it meddled with," replied she, still amiably, but with decision. "I set it by the sun at noontime, and in the afternoon it don't make any great difference whether 1 know what time it is or not." '"But how are yoa going to set it on ehmdy days?" "We are not very busy when it storms, and so we dont mind if it ain't set." "I aope you are not afraid I should hurt it?** continued the repairer. "No, not exactly afraid," said the old lady, prudently, "but Hiram and me had the clock when we were married, and I guess we won't have it touched." As the traveling tinker was about to leave, he made one more effort. ""Why, ma'am," said he, "yoa won't even know when its meal times unless yoa give me a chance at that clock." The old lady looked at him with a twinkle in her eye. ""Young man," said she, "when you're as old as I be, maybe yonll have sense enough to eat when you're hungry."-- Jeweler's Weekly. The Fashionable Vice of Smoking and Tippling. The habit of smoking indaiged in by some women of to-day has beoome a fashionable viee, of which the gossipers who write them up have less to say than they have of the tippling habit, which is growing rapidly; and, as it is treated in the same connection with to­ bacco, it may be criticised as a kindred vice of women. There have been stories of resorts in New York and other large cities where women engaged in shop­ ping have found opportunities for in­ dulgence in secret in the stimulants that men find in tbe "sample-room." It is 6aid that in many shops of modistes and others wines are regularly dis­ pensed to customers. One of the re- oent"adornments" of the sex is the vin- iagrette, which too often contains essen­ tial liquids, the use of which may be called dangerous. Smoking by women may be an "unfeminine vice," but it cer­ tainly is not as bad as tippling. The habit of smoking by women may be traced to the introduction of the cigarette, which is a sort of a homeo­ pathic dose of the fascinating weed, and indulgence in it should be discounte­ nanced by both sexes on the primary principle of its great physical and men­ tal injury. The smoking of a single cigarette has little of the nauseating effect produced by a cigar, and this fact no doubt accounts for its use by the gentle sex. But the use of tobacco in any form by the woman is more dis­ gusting even than its use by men, as profanity falling from the woman's lips shocks even the most profane man. When women unsex themselves they Ioso the admiration of men which they seek. Man admires woman as nature made her-- pure, gentle, and refined. Men dislike masculinity in women or any attempt at it. Women should not smoke.--Albany Journal. She--No, air, it is impossible. I am sorry, indeed, but I can never marry you. He--And yet the encouragement yoa gave me last night in the waltz-- She--Oh that mustn't be counted; what I aaid was under pressure, ao to speak. Ike Magaifteeat Amy of the Twur. If you wish to see military Bussia in all its glory and epic luxury you must take your place in the first days of April on one of those tribunes which rise at the extremity of the Champs d$. Mars on both sides of the imperial vilion. Society meets there to at the' grand spring review. All guard is massed before us--20,000 at least, and perhaps more. O States may pride themselves on a tary force equivalent to this, but n'i can show a force so magnificent picturesque in aspect. All the and all the arms of this varied empire are about to defile before our eyes, from those noble Chevalier Guards, Who seem to have been resuscitated from the romantic Middle Ages, down to |he Kirgheez of the Asiatic steppe, who a\re still pagans. "Attention!" Thousand^ of voices have transmitted the same word of command. "Tho Emperor!" He appears yonder at the corner of the Champ de Mars. The moment he is seen all the flags flutter, all the bands join in one formidable chorus to send heavenward the sounds of the national hymn, "God save the Tsar." The Em­ peror arrives at a gentle gallop. Be­ hind him follows an escort which makes many hearts beat amongst the fair pub­ lic of the tribunes. It is a gathering of the most illustrious names and the finest horsemen of the Russian nobility. All the armies of the world have con­ tributed to form this staff. The Hun­ garian magnate rides side by side with the Japanese military attache,the French kepi salutes the fez of the Mussulman bey. The master passes along the front of his troops; the Empress follows in an open barouche. At th<i approach of their Majesties the band of each reg­ iment resumes the hymn with wild fury --a hurricane of harmony, which ac­ companies and envelops the imperial procession. The traditional salutations are exchanged between the Tsar and his soldiers: "Good-day, children." "We are happy to do well for your Imperial Majesty. The sovereign stops before the tri­ bune of the Grand-Duchesses; he gives the signal, and the march past begins. At the head are the platoons of the Asiatic escort, Eastern and wild Bussia, Mussulmans from Khiva and Bokhara, Georgian priuces, Tclierkesses, Per­ sians, Mongols, and Caucasians. These primitive warriors, armed with lances and steel maces, wear long coats of mail over their brilliant silk dresses, furs of great price, damascened helmets or Tar­ tar caps. This is the vanguard of the hordes of Attila, the concession made in the regular army to legend and fancy. Then oome the compact masses of the regular army, the infantry first of all--Preobrajensky, Finland Chas­ seurs, and soldiers of the Paul Regi­ ment, with their large copper hats in the form of mitres--such as were worn by the Grenadiers of Frederick the Great. In accordance with an old tra­ dition, all men who have flat noses are recruited for this regiment. The lines of cavalry follow the infantry like liv­ ing walla of brass and steel'. Then come the light troops--Red Hussass, Grenadiers, and Lancers; and finally swarms of Cossacks, galloping on their little ponies, sweep along from the ex­ tremity of the Champs de Mars at full Bpeed, stop and turn short at the f6ot of the imperial tribune. These troops perform the exercises of the Arab fan­ tasia--lie down on their saddles, lean over the ground without quitting their stirrups, and pick up the lance or pis­ tol that they have thrown down before them. The artillery doses the march. The batteries, admirably horsed, are carried along at full speed by black chargers as fine as the finest trotters.-- The Vicomte Eugene Melchior dt Vogue, in Harper's Magazine. Making Old Furniture. There is a great passion nowadays for anti<fne articles of furniture, and it has given birth to a world of sham antiqui­ ties, says a Paris correspondent of the Boston Transcript An army of handi­ craftsmen are busily engaged in the manufacture of these wares, which are palmed off on confiding people as being two or three hundred years old, and dated from any desired landmark in history. Old chairs,old tables, old dress­ ers, old bedsteads, and old anything, even if made last week, have great value in the eyes of many persens satis­ fied with antiquity in appearance. Worm-eaten furniture is now one of the rages. This stuff is easily pro­ duced with the aid of bird shot, which is fired into it. Old houses torn down furnish worm-eaten timber, which is turned to good account in fabricating old sets of furniture. Old -door-keys, mediaeval bellows, gilt flambeaux in Louis XIV. style, warming pans and brass fenders of the fourteenth century, candelabra, and even old snuffers, find purchasers as fast as these antique wares can be made i>y skillful artisans in out-of-the-way places of the gay cap­ ital. Old coins and regency clocks are cast by the ton every day in Paris, but they are very scarce and bring fabulous prices. Busbies*. Miss Cometothepoint--Ah ! Mr. Long- defer, you cannot tell what tcoubles' a girl ha's who is receiving the attention of a gentleman. Mr. Longdefer--Troubles ? Of what nature, pray ? Miss C.--Oh! from the inqnisitiveness of parents, for instance. They want to know everything. There's pa, now; ho is constantly asking such questions as, " Mary, what are Mr. Longfeder's inten­ tions ? What does he call upon you so regularly for, and stay so late when he does call ?" Mr. L.--And what answer do yoa make, Mary.? Miss C.--I couldn't make any answer at all, for you see you--you--hadn't said anything to -me, and--and, of course-- Then Mr. Longfeder told Mary what to tell her father.--Boston Courier. . George Wt» an Old Resident. "I was sitting in the Philadelphia depot waiting for the train," said a Philadelphian to a party of New York friends, "when a particularly old and decrepit negro came and sat down by my side. When he had gathered itt sufficient breath to insure his ability to answer, I asked him what his name was. " 'George Washington, sah,' he re­ plied. " 'George Washington?" I said, in a playful way, 'the name sounds strangly familiar, I believe I have heard of it be­ fore. ' " 'I spccs yo' has, boss,' said the old rann proudly, 'I has been around these parts er good many yeahs, I has.'" Aw "octave" dinner is the latest fash­ ionable craze. The guest sarrive after everything is ate up. \ A bulk of three--for one to like his departure. That Offer of $5,000. Ow readers will doubtless call to mind >U1« offer so widely advertised for the past van years by H. H. Warner St Co., Ike pro­ prietors of Warner's Safe Cure and War- /aer's Log Cabin Remedies, that they would pay S6.0G0 to any person who would prove to an impartial referee that they bad ever pub­ lished a testimonial that was notgenuinoso far as they knew. This offer had the ring of honesty about it, and as the matter has an especial inter­ est just now we give a copy of the offer as it appears in the Messrs. H. H. Warner St Co. 8 pamphlet «~An Oim or fB.OOOlOO.jBV Every Testimonial published bf/ us is Son* Fide, and. so far as we know, is absolutely true. To any one who will prove the contra­ ry to an impartial referee we will (five $5,000.00. H. H. WARNER St CO. Rochester, JK Y., January 2,1888. We ask the reader's careful attention to the following testimonials, as bearing on the offer, and their unbiased opinion of the same With reference to the $f>,000. Iowa Citt, la.. June 30, 1888.--Some Seeks since luy daughter had a severe at-ick'pf Kheumatism. She was persuaded to take one bottle of Warner's Bufe Cure, atid one of Warner's Safe Rheumatic Cure, and has entirely recovered. We think it wonderful, as twice before she had been confined to her bed for months with it.-- JtBs. S\lvanus Johnson. Camp Vekde, Arizona, Oot. 87. 1888.-- For nearly a year I suffered from Gravel, and was under the treatment of a doctor. I took a great deal of medicine, but It all seamed to fail. I then began with Warner's Safe Cure, and after using one bottle of it began to get hotter: got another bottle, and took half of it. Tho gravel stone left me, an i I began to mend. I am now feeling as well as I ever did in mv lite.--Mas. Doi.lt SON. 231 Myrtle Ave., Buffalo, N. Y., Nov., 188*.--In 1866 I was attacked with kidney disease, and suffered for twenty years, ap­ plying often for advice to medical men of higl standing, without any apparent relief. In 1886 I was advised to try Warner's Safe Cur*e, and after having used fifteen bottles of It I was completely cured, and am happy to state that I have never felt the disease since in any form.--P. B. McMui.i.kn. Newark. N. Y., June 20,1888. Last winter I was attacked with severe kldhey difficulty, which incapacitated me for Work, severe pains in the small of the back, attended with almost constant aching on the least exertion. I suffered much pain, the passage of water was a severe trial, ac- oompanied with much scalding and redness of the urine. I felt I was suffering from pre­ monitory symptoms of Blight's Disease. I procured a bottle of Warner's Safe Cure, and after taking the first bottle I felt so much, improved that I continued to take it to the extent of four bottles. I am now a new man. able to do a good hard day's work, with no recurrence of any trouble with the kidneys,--Mandeville W. Plass. There Is no getting away from such testi­ mony as the above. Tho offer is genuine. In fact Messrs. H. H. Warner Si Co. have always requested that doubters should write direct to persons giving testimonials (in­ closing stamp), and who are of necessity, in the great majority of oases, totally unac­ quainted with the firm. •ore Serious than He Thought. An old man was arrested on Cham- plain street the other day for kicking up a disturbance, and on the way to the station he said to the officer: "I don't want to be looked up, and 111 give jou ten cents to let me go." "No, sir--no, sir!" "Ill make it twenty." "No, sir!" "Say twenty-five," "No, sir--not for fifty." "What! Fifty cents! Say, this must be a mighty serious matter, old fellow. Bet you three to one you think you have got the fellow who stole Charlie Ross!" Detroit Free Press. Seemingly Kr»dlo»t«d With repeated and powerful dotes of qulnlna, chills and fever, in some one of its various forma, springs Into active existence again, often with­ out the slightest apparent provocation. To ex­ tinguish the smouldering embers of this ob­ stinate aad recondite malady, no leas than to subdue it when it rages fiercely in the system, Hostetter's JStomaoh Bitters is all sufficient. When every resource of the pharmacopoeia has been exhausted against it in vain, the Bitters conquer it--will remove every lingering vestige of it. Nay, more, the Bitters will protect those brought within the influence of the atinoepheric poison that begets malarial disease, from its attacks. Disorders of the stomach, liver and bowels, are among the com- plaints to be apprehended from the uae of niiUHma-taintod water. These are both cured and prevented by the Bitters. Rheumatism, consti­ pation and renal complaints yield to its action. Chicago Weather Predictions. Go put away your ulster and bring out your new spring coat, for the air's as fine a poem as a poet ever wrote; its balmy breath and soft caress creates the casual wish that you knew some quiet place to go and sit and smoke and fish; or loll upon a grassy bank and read a bonny book; or "peel" and "go in swimmin'," with no person near to look; or wander in the timberland and pluck the fragrant flowers and fill the happy, happy days with happy, happier hours; or climb a sun-kissed hay stack in the bottom-land and dream of that wondrous land of vision, of that blossom-bordered stream which poets like to picture in their rausic-haunted lines, as purling through those legend- locked and halcyon confines; or clam­ ber up an apple tree and perch upon a limb and breathe the blossoms' fra­ grance as you sing a silent hymn; or with a loved one stroll at eve and in­ spiration drink from the beauty of the landscape and the banjo's pleasant pink. Your mind insists on rioting on such a day as this--a day as full of ecstasy as" love's initial kiss. At noon the wind was from the south­ east at six miles an hour.--Chicago Mail. Catarrh Can't Be Cured With LOCAL APPLICATION, m thay eaanot reach the seat of the disease. Catarrh ia a blood or constitutional disease and in order to cure it yon have to take internal remediea. Ball's Catarrh Core ia taken internally, . and acta di­ rectly on the blood and mucus aur.'ace. Hall s Catarrh Care ia no quack medicine. It was pre­ scribed by one of the best physicians in this country for yearH. and is a regular prescription. It is composed of the best tonics known, com­ bined with the best blood purifiers, acting di- rejtly on the mucus surface. The perfect com­ bination of tiie two ingredients is what produces such wonderful results in curing catarih. Bend for testimonials free. F. J. i HENEX & CO., Props* KoMo, Ohio. Sold by Druggists, prica 75a DaatWefiry. * Of course, life is fall of caww; every one knows tftfct, and every one has cau8eto worry about something. If the children are ill, or the husband has failed in business, these are things one naturally worries about. These are the big things of life that must be borne and about which one cannot help worrying. _ But it is the many little things of. life over which people worry most-, and which are not worth worrying about. A careful housekeeper will fret about the way her servant enters the room before company, or passes a dish at the table; frowns will settle down upon her face that are seen by the guests, who have not seen the causes. The woman will worrv incessantly about her health. If she has the smallest ache in any part of her body, or the slightest languor, the whole household is upset, and for a few hours every­ thing is in the widest state of confusion, while the victim (for she certainly is a victim to her worrying disposition) imagines herself a hundred times more ill than she is, and dies many times before she dies once. Graphology. Yellowly--Do you think it possible to tell character by handwriting ? Brownly--I do. Y.--Upon what grounds do you base your belief? B.--Here's a letterTve just received. It reads: "Dear Sir--Please find check inclosed for amount due. Yours, John Smith." What do you think of that kind of writing, eh/ Y.--I should say that was a good man. B.--You bet!--Boston Courier. Consumption Surely Cured. To the Editor: Please inform your readers that I have a positive cure for Consumption. By its timely use thousands of hopeless cases have been permanently cured. I shall be glad to send two bottles of my remedy Fbee to any of your readers who have con­ sumption, if they will send me their Express and P. O. Address. Respectfully. T. A. BLOCUM. 1L C.. 181 Pearl St.. N.Y. THE WORST WRECK, PHYSICALLY Or any Man ThU Country Etst Saw, CsradL Jackson, Mich., October, 1885. Rheumatic Syrup Co. GENTLBMS.N: In November, 1884. I was cut in the wrist by a broken bottle, from which I suffered extreme pain. I called a doctor who pronounced it sciatic rheumat­ ism. He gave me a morphine injection in my right shoulder, which resulted in j paralyzing my right side. I was kept un­ der the influence of morphine until last March. My right leg and arm had become badly withered and my joints were so stiff that there was but little action in them. About that time I discontinued the use of morphine. About six weeks ago I first heard of your Rheumatic Syrup and was advised to try it. And here let me impress this fact upon your mind, that my rignt arm and leg were shrunken, para­ lyzed. and withered so much that I could hardly walk or swing along, and that but little, and attended with groat effort and ain. Since I have been taking your Syrup have left off the use of crutches entirely. PfyhrnxAND JMTHqiITI flSftimSISMI %6bsMaiinei-Bu&i WHY YOU SHOULD USE SCOTT'S EMULSION COD LIVER HYPOPHOSPHITia* It is Palatable as ICDc. It is three times as plain Cod Unr OH. It is far superior to all erthsr s»» Emulsions. It is a perfect Emulsion, dots tfl* separate or change. It is wonderfuJ as a flesh It Is the best remedy for Scrofula, Bronchitis, Wi Chronis Cough aad and only use a cane, and for the past few *ys aid. To say 1hat I am happy, and that it days I often forget it and walk without any has greatly benefited me, but poorly ex­ presses my idea of your Rheumatic byrup. Yours truly. C. D. D*nio. Dealer in General Groceries, corner Trail and Mechanic Streets. Mr. G. D. Dcnie is a man well known in this community, and was probably the worst wreok. physically, of any man this country over saw. He was paralyzed from rheumatic poison, and no one ever ex­ pected ho would «et well. He is well, and it'Is simply marvelous. The above state­ ment made by him Is true, and may be fully relied upon. I am truly yours. Frank L. Smith, Ex-member State Legislature, and pro­ prietor Hurd House. Jackson. Mleh. * ^ Uncle Epliralm's Adyiee. C® "De onliest trubble wuf de colored race," said Uncle Ephraim to his son in oae of his philosophic moods, "am dat dey don't understan' de gradual- uess ob progression. Dey wants ter trabble in live minits to whar hit takes ten v'ars ter git to, an dey am always thinkin' dey's dar befoh dey is. Dis man an' brudder business am all right, but dar's a whole lot of cases whah da ain' nigh ernuff man an' altogedder too much brudder. Yoh's jes as good as anybody else,sonny, butyolihab got to wurk for a eddieation an' respectability pe same as er white man."--Merchant Traveler. lOO ttiliM Wanted, And 100 men to call daily on any druggist Tor a free trial package of Lane's Family Meniclne. the great root and herb remedy, discovered by Dr. Silas Lane while in the Rocky Mountains. For diseases of the blood, liver and kidneys it is a positive cure. For constipation and clearing up the complexion it docs wonders. Children like it. Every one praises it. Large size pack­ age. 50 cents. At all druggists. He Knew How. The maid has gone out and Habaoa has volunteered to set,the tea-table. Mrs. Hobson--You're not going to put the white ware .ou first, are you, Hector? Mr. Hobson--Why not ? That's the way I usually drees myself.--Judge. tag diseases, Golds. M* fry «D Fteol Remedy for Cktanti It Ow l Best, lftwrtW to Use, and ObaapML C A T A R R H 8o!d by druestMs or mnt bf 90c. g. T. HatrtBne, Vw, ffc B| time to tbs bniinesa. Span A few F. JOHKHON a itably employed and cities. B. 1 -Richmond, ya. N.B.--Pmm «ejwriencs. timer mind atcut xartwtf pljr B.F.J. SCO. , Tkt OUtH Mtdicin* t» tk* trerldt* This . scrtption, century. T1 are •uojeet none, pertuuw, for which mn tried without roooeaa. For»Ue: of the ejr«* it ia an Infallible remedr. lt tions are followed It wUl never fUL. W» invite the attention of pt fcCo' TW^Y^artaWlAed m 'FHEM mwm -- -- -- i ^ M S -- -- -- f l h i W M M -- ^ HMCHILD BIRTHM IP U8«D ••PONS COWIIM--HIV BOOK TO "Mothehs'IUlILSDL- IKUriEUI RMlLATat C*. ATifMMitlt SOLD BT AU. DXtTMBR* MUR THIS PAWa mi --I !• »1i CHEAP Burlington ; Route IdoaotiMMBMray to ttte-knur study. I warn for not BOW imtTinf s P. •. \SK> | 1 The Chief Reason for the great sueeen ef Bood's Sarsaparilla la found in the fact that Her it Wins. It is the best blood purifier and actually accomplishes all that is claimed for it. Prepared only by €. I. Hood A Co.. Lowell. Mats. Al AA <-lb Family Scale, Brans Beam and Scoop, ™l«wU worth $5. Chicago Scale Co., Chicago. Dl. MENTION THIS PAPER w»» »«m»® PATENTS JSss" .j--*>-- ' Of One Mind* Writer--Sometimes I hate to xead my own printed works. Header (sympathizingly) -- I often feel that way, too. Oregon, the Psradltw of Farmtn.' Mild, equable climate, certain and abundant orope. Bert fruit, grain, grass, and stock eotia- try in the world. Full information free. Addr«as ROADCIRTSto MENTION THIS PAF Sargend tor circular. _ 940 cart for S15. Catalogue iree. < HIGA«o scale t o., Chu*r>>ui. PAPER »•» wamae ia i»umiu. WELL DRILLS FOR ALL PURPOSES. M 20 eta. fornllkt grtalogaes with tall FXAuHillfc* Iarpeirfer St Carroll Cktof, Ilk $5 AGENTS W --oocDUM rasa. UH» Brewster's Bafrtr oala- IF YOU WISH A GOOD REVOLVER purchase one of ttw -- brated SMITH * WBSBO siviSffiSffafs *le or double action. Safe*- Tarvetmodela Cons SLKrjfrya:1. . larabllttT ssiictsraer. cheap •alljuble ca areoften aofiTforthe onir unreliable, (but _ WESSON Revolrers are -- - rela with Ann a name, addMW and are tsaraileei Perfect to siet upon aaving the genuine article,! dealer cannot supply yoa wi «*"*' below will receive prompt ana Descriptive catalogue and prioaa--__ plication. SMITH & WES! iSF' Mention this paper SntacMi VSHSBHHHHRHCrilMimrii,] MS SEWiRCiSend for list of 1.000 articles at one-half tUCmRt Sill price. Chicago Scale Co., Chicago, ill. MENTION THIS PAPEa wun vairmt n itntnaiia. I Representatives wanted. I Goods new and sell on sight. necessity. No canvassing. Klite Mfg. Co., Pullman Vide, Chicago. M If 1500 lb. Platform, »ioTT,M0 lb.. «15: 1.500 lb.. Kllf I *20: SV ton Wagon Scale. $40; 5 ton,«50. Liot li.80 I FREE. Ain .Farm Scale Co., Chicago. 111. CATON'S fhemoh VITAMERS, Wnj VII M Maaly Tim. a»d th« aaly UfitiMt* ft* •asaaWatoUtv aad U«t TitaHtj kaawa- A MarvvUra* lancantor. i»ilr> WfcanaUM. »>«ail. gl. tfcrgft. Circular* fr*«. Pfc. Cli05.1 H • DETECTIVES Wanted In every eaantr. 8hrevdm«atoaetaa<erlnitnietlaa. la oar Secret 8*r*lc«, Experfsnc not seeeMarj. Srnd Sc. 6rannanOstecilveBureauCo.44Arcads. Cincinnati.0. ALMErS MAGNETIC I This Inhaler eonaists of anewtsfatl removable caps. StUfcrers are a Catarrh ia due to the preeence c i "-'-f -yin and'Ao""-* ~ | one or two simple inhalattoaa tfce TSliiiuauiaa i i Bliiiw in tbecatwriialnacaaAeaaterawaf t&ei asites which, before the Inhalations, were it in necesaarr not only to kill ttaar strengthen the mwnbrane. Tniiaia the electric force stand OB in the X in* the most powerful natural tonic cn WOILS own The world ought tc «one for me in the curt which was so bad as to U« bj the physicians Went to lie treated. One ma s copy of an adver* Swift's Specific, and 1 relief from the first few gradually forced out of Boon eurrd sound and months since I qnit tak xsvwn. know what S. S. S. hu of a m sllOTant Cancer, be .considered incurs- iu Chicago, where I of my ueiglibors sect tiseKient in regard to besjsti taking it. I got doses; the poison was mv eysiein, and I was well It is now tea inp s. s. S. and I hava had no sign of return of the dreadful disease. Mas. Ajcn Sonwiu, . An Sable, MMfa^ Dec. 29, '38. Bead for books on Blood Diseases and Canon, --"** Una, not Bwrrr Ffecifio Co. Drawer 3, Atlanfs. Qa. baler oenetioial Forwarded by mail on a a oo X fNKriha Mrf taS.Blt fi m spacflc tor thaw sjhaaswi.%. w<t tan sold Matt ta* SoWhfl WHEN WRITING TO AD1 please mmw rn mm Kl« thft« imper. ^ ' i p k ' Evsrm Don't waste roar n>oo«r magma or robber eeat tlnroBMW® : ,1 atMclutel^wnUr and vWraoor. and will " Ask lor tha rlSH koWffs. N«M gnoia* mlc**. villi tfe«' TIAP1 Mill, ! Il» "fisa