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" , ft ?• s- tv.*' : 'if *' "* { '**'*•»- '< v :' - S-. > K * i -' . -^ »•#> ' ^ ^ '.n'.-V,.'. * i" . j "^.v.v N> £l&** * * $ t /*ji > • t v"1, / 4( I I $ • ' ' r : --# ,, * • ̂ r" *!f , t *<H> ** ' <* V^'V* Air ^ • ^ '*V '? f J »f * - '* {T- "'P' i'^'M h !'/<*"•: ' c " v ; • ' J ~ \ • ~ n • , - x - - " ' ; , V ! •<-• .is f !®¥SiP &• im** 8si >:» W.'"">L IMt * "S 1 ' . *' * •'*, < u 4 V*s%-'ft vii^ • v > ' • » - , < * ^ ' % , ; v - " v Oi c ^ # •; ' 3r*t ^3 . 41 -V ' ; t.?; k -A '?* ^ ,;, •? .•• - 4'\.';ti • vv^ • !, \* ^ > ^-W >. ̂ ,\, - • I ^ v> v 1' ? - / , ^ . ,1, .» »'* "i, 'hit' ,. i, *" ..'•i , J ' * is ^ tV i',"'5< .,' • Hkf *'*W> ' * • ? ' . / *> w , * i f , > 'J**' * 1 t ^ v 41 ®a; . . M ̂ -V1 t y f- •%1£t 'f *• Readers 4 jii" * »v r^y r." - ff-".. * \K- .n' <> *4 ' " ^ ^ V t : "v h // < v ( ; • - f i r v » : ?v^ ; •te^: ; : ' ' .V: * '> j.;"1VW*. >k >4. ]£ '̂\ r*"\ H V ^T> ?->r^W. ^ 5'^""; •> r*-*- + r , ; V V ' v v ! v " . ; - V ; - V " . V ' A ' ...^.,i. ' . XVji'/. v.>«.. #%..A «* ..-f..«>r . < • f.'..-. t ^ /Jk! . f ' „ •> 'y.^ .* >f~ ,v'V " ,*" ,vv *;\ < . Vi 4.* , ' f " •%h 1 S"s9tSjf rr fe# %t. 4> :••" ?'%.' '-/i: i fr i , V'r:" » i~'->y[-" ' ..>;.»..fiVs-i .-•. < 4 ; »•- kV rt^ .r,.',./- •< fa* :•'•'^' : *£*'" r" * '••• hf'T^^V ' '• <f*<?.^ i'ni*"; •-/t,\:", ,V 'ij ^ ^ * 'j •- ' ~ VJv 4 -J I K ;'.>.-^J' f4 A trial; will convince you 'V » v*^ 1 "•>*'*? ,*' "..^i;( ^ ..^1 - ^ -\/s k"s', •* 'f * ' <9%h , A / . $ * r ..WW* ' • > ' ny?:r I :• ' «&K 'IJ'A "V ' J ' *1 " THEl pj. B« Had Some I4iM «t Ucl« J«»» the Same. "Speaking of chronic touchers," said •M man about town, MI suppose there $ev«r was an easier victim for the tribe than my old boss. The colonel, is we all c&Ued hi'm, had an impedi­ ment In his speech, and he" usel to claim it was easier to go down In his pocket than to try to put up an excuse. As a mutter of fact, he had a heart as big as a hogshead and simply, couldn't resist an appeal. * "One of the numerous toucher# who marked him down as prey was a chap by the name of--well, call him Smiley,: which isn't far from the right thing. "Smiley was a brisk, plausible cuss and always did his touching on the strength of d circumstantial story, but tiie trouble was he did so much of it he used to Sometimes get his cues mixed. "The first time he tapped the colonel he rushed in, all excitement, and told him his wife had Just fallen down stairs and broken her leg. He needed a ten for unforeseen expenses, and of course he got it. Some time elapsed, and one day he turned up again. " 'Colonel,' he said in a frank, busi­ nesslike fashion, 'can you lend me $5? I owe you a little money now, but I have some sickness out at my bouse and really need this amount.' " 'What's the t-t-trouble. my b-b-boy?' stuttered the old man kindly as be handed over the Ave. '"My wife has just fractured her, an­ kle,' replied Smiley. "It requires a good deal of nerve to make a third touch at the same place, and Smiley staid away for fully six months. When he came in, it was on the run. * •"Colonel* he exclaimed breathless­ ly, 1 feel like a dog when I see you, but I've got to have a couple of dollars quick and haven't time .to go anywhere else. Can you accommodate me and just 4 make a mem. of the whole amount? I'll send it to you next week.' " 'Why, whafs the m-m-matter?' asked the colonel, startled by his man- ner. " 'My "^rife has broken her leg,' he replied, 'and I want to send a cab for a doctor.' " 'B-b-broken another I-l-leg!' echoed the colonel, amazed. 'Here's the m-m-money. Smiley. B-b-but some­ times I think,' he added grimly, 'that you m-m-must have m-m-married a c-c-centlped!' *--New Orleans Democrat. Yankee Thrift. A guest with an irascible temper at a hotel in a New England town fonnd that the dinner was not to his liking, and he had no hesitancy in telling the waiter so. Finally he threw down his knife and fork. ' "Well," he exclaimed, "there's no use in talking. I can't eat this stuff." "I'm sorry, sir," responded the wait­ er, "but you might as well, for you'll have to pay for it anyhow."--Detroit Free Press. ' MBB|, bas the ,rtfp|p:ion of """"TPiBfr liquor per^lpftija thi .any. in, the.woiwfe I fcave never seen liquor of all kind consumed In such quantities as here| but apparently there is very Mtt&t drunkenness. The dry atmosphere Mid the atoms of sand that one is conafiuat- ly inhaling excite an abnormal nq doubt, and they say that the system requires an unusual amount of stfhralant to sustain .the heat and fatigue of this climate. I am quite sure that this duty is not neglected, judging by the extraordinary excesses which are witnessed without comment daily and hourly at every club and ho­ tel. Half a dozen cocktails before break- fast--one man at Iquique Is said to require 17 to start his machinery in motion--a bottle of Scotch or Irish whisky at breakfast, another at lunch, wines and cordials at dinner, brandy and soda every now and then during the day, alternating with copious and frequent drafts of beer and the same repeated all |the evening, with a, night­ cap of whisky and a bottle beside the bed in case of a restless night--this Is considered a moderate indulgence, and the way they mix things is amazing. I have seen a party of business men around a table at a ciub drinking cock­ tails. brandy and soda, beer, cham- r pagne, sherry and vermuth at the isame sitting during business hours and return to repeat the performance sev- eral times during the day.--Chile Letr ter in Chicago Record. :j¥S A" * ^ ^ w V-^v V^ *'j - -A? f4'. ^ to pi i iiflt' "A. ' syg m*A Ki -fr> " -iiT JULIA A. STORY McHenry, HI. Rot a Hardihlf, "Do Mr. and Mrs. Wickelson, the peo­ ple who live across the hall from you, ever disturb you at night by their quar­ reling? I am told that they fight like cats and dogs." "They do fight, but we are not dis­ turbed in the least. My husband al­ ways permits me to let the transom down and listen without a protest."-- Chicago Times-Herald. . Her Sarcatm, "What branch of art does yo«i» friend prefer?" asked the young woman. "I don't know," answered Miss Cay­ enne, "but I should say he is an im­ pressionist" "Has be produced anything remark­ able in that line?" "Yes; the Impression" that he is an artist."--Washington Star. ??;f \ . Chance to Get Evenfe^;;?" Young Bridegroom--Darling, I think I should like to take your little brother with us to Niagara falls, ' Bride--How kind that would be Of you, Harry! Young Bridegroom--Yes. I should like to push him over them.--Chicago Tribune •. V*;. ,* - • "I I-- , **{.. V j-i Z1!- Cold Comfort. "Looks as though our day was done," said the dejected horse. "Oh, I don't know!" replied Opti­ mistic Dobbin. "They'll need leather for certain parts of these automobiles, and they'll probably use our hides for that"--Philadelphia Press. %Kh S- >4i. Reliable Medicine. MB>0 you believe In mind cure?**, -, • "Yes," answered Mr. Meektbn's wife. "It sometimes works with matters of habit. Every time I give Mr. Meekton a piece of my mind about smoking it cures him for several days."--Washing­ ton-Star. . - The Bnarlneer'e Story. run over a man--perhaps that^s the only thing of all that shakes me. To see him on the track within 10 or 20 feet of you. to know that you can't stop to save him, to feel the wheels of the; engine go over his body, crunching oui: his life--a man doesn't want to expert*, enge that more than once in"a lifetime/ ( "It/s^worse with a child. There was an old rtiflte of mine in tl^e west whenf I was ridltog in the Union Pacific--nev4 er mind h^s naip^: he's dead now--as? good an engtet»er as ever stood in ht box, cool, nerve like steel, had been through three wrecks, a holdup and a fire. Well, one day .Tim was a little be­ hind his schedule and made like any*? thing for the next stop. There was crossing right in front of him. He| saw that everything was clear, as h# thought, and went right ahead, when; I all at once out of a clump of trees there ran a little golden haired fairy right in front of the engine. It was all over: in one Instant, and when the train stop­ ped Jim dropped like a log. It was two; months before he crept back again to work. But he could never come to that crossing but he saw the little girl with1 her hair fluttering in the wind running; out from the trees. And one day hef Just got off his engine, turned it over tt% the second man and walked away, nev-. er to be seen again until his body wa* found in the river."--Leslie's Weekly. J I® The Unpardonable . "Glrls are getting awfully nhickf?* "What's the matter now?*' ^ "That gjrl refused me." 1,'v "Did she give any reason 7' "She says I made a pun wbHe I was proposing to her."--"Detroit Free Press. v. '<mi Hli Old Hablta Abandoned. "It was too bad about Nell Richman's husband dying so suddenly, wasn't it?" "Did he die suddenly ?" "Yes. Hadn't you heard about it?" "No. I thought he was from Philft- delphla."--Chicago Times-Herald. ' '.That Depends. ̂ "What Is the difference between a •harp man and a smooth rascal?" ^Frequently there is no difference. The term depends upon whether you profit or lose by the operations of |Jbe man in question."--Chicago Post r ., c ; Dnll Wftte*. ' ';r-: Borrowell--I can't imagine what yon see In Smithkins. He's so very dull. Wigwag--He's sharp enough t0 eot Phiifldelphifi fytyrt. Engliah Restaurants. Different countries produce different! foods. Perhaps that is the reason why, a description of a railway restaurant; in England sounds so curious to Amer­ ican ears. This terminus restaurant corresponds to the American lunch counter, where pie and coffee are the staple refreshments of the hurried hun­ gry man. Patrons crowd the English place three deep and wait for the front row to finish eating and depart One elder­ ly woman drinks hot spirit and water and eats sandwiches. Beside her a country couple devour buns and milk- how British "buns" sounds!--and a busy man eats sponge cake and drinks port wine. Can one imagine a Chicago broker • rushing into a quick lunch counter with a demand for sponge cake? He ullght as weir ask for a coach and four. In this London restaurant a mother of a family regales herself and her meek husband with ginger beer and cakes, and a nervous young clergy­ man asks for a glass of milk. Buns, sponge cake, milk and beer--the menu Is a little different from those on this side of the water.--Chicago ftews, |,W ; 7^ The Boston Boy's Diversions, ' "Emerson," said Mrs. Beaconstreet, "how did you comport yourself in the thoroughfare this morning with your new neighbors?" "I fear, ma mere," replied Emerson, "that our actions were scarcely sucfy as would much intensify our intellects. You see, he knows nothing of Auguste Comte, his parents have forbidden him Voltaire, he dislikes Mr. Shakespeare, and his familiarity with chemistry and astronomy is superficial to a weary­ ing degree. So we made mud p«pa>f*~ Boston Courier. ^ : f ' Wonders of New Hampshire. ' --The average, reader will be amazed, to learn that little New Hampshire, with less than 10,000 square miles, has no less than 406 Idkes and ponds, 154 brooks, 58 rivers and 294 mountains. This makes Iowa look small. Colorado, a big state, has 550 creeks. Texas has comparatively few rivers, lakes and creeks. Alabama has 603 creeks and 87 rivers. Iowa cannot approach that record. Minnesota has 222 lakes and 140 rivers.--New York Press. you are buying: goods come in and save * 25 cents on the dollar. ;* , v A NEW BILL OF GOODS Men's heavy winter jpnts Fine hair lined pants .. >')».»*I'VfH ifl'iH 1. 'h I' iK'imii'illViiiinii^.iii-i ' 'if. " '%>•' u'fii 9' * tjt ^ \ > Fine Cliy Gaskm&re Suife . " Heavy Clay Suits, all wttol* Blue broadcloth finished* suit B e s t O v e r s h i r t s . . . . . . . . . . . $1.90 $3.00 .00 y4rjihfr& 10.00 »95C 1- f 4 prs good Socks* Boys' Knee Pant®.. t<:, % .!f 4 " "'I.* t Q Boys Suspenders OC, IOC9 I §C Boys' $2 Shoes, beat in markefc, ior» .$1*50 B o y s ' $ 3 B o o t s , d o u b l e t a p . . ^ . $ 1 * 7 5 Men's $2.25 Boots* double mlmV 1*75 jriii E. LAWLUS, rtcHenry, 111. W W'l.K'P \ limlertiklRt 1»SpecUHy .,M ,.v $ Al' ;V ; 1 3;^;: ":V:C-/;Jmow all about it mention ot all the articles in the furniture line that constitute the immense stock in onr store. Yon Furniture prices r »* ^ave advanced during the past few , inonths, but we luckily had a good • Supply on hand at the time prices. 7 jvent up, and can still offer you bar- ^ains., Seeing ia ̂ t *nd aefcs , 4 t ^ y , V } \ ; :„f v \ ^ , J ^ x v , j r j > V - * \i! i ,%•}. •V 'V/,.-, r ^ 0*« *:•> V , *" ,. <, % # *V';- 'V ' •4 V Ills Vocation. p^Illeks4£t Is a shame the w«y Blister is bringing up that boy of his. The lad doesn't know how to read or write, and there is no indication of his ever being sent to school. Wicks--Buster knows what he is do­ ing, you can depend upon it Probably he Intends when that boy reaches man-, hood he will have all the business he can attend to as criminal court juror.-- Boston Transcript. Sharp. out your tongue, Tom- m£ Tommy--Wot on your life! I did that yesterday to my teacher. And I still ache all over for it»--Wiener Tagblatt I <? $ <5 * p ROrtOIOI HUT PlfOTtaS! ' , 5- ••• % J* la iU Unit Royal Union Mutual Life _ 't is Good Insurance Company! "~"u *. i Maine®, bu.. t" 'm* *5 ' * Jf i lOWi 4^^-^ . ^ * lhMf. ,.w. i..}• '-J ' Affords the Best] • *' • -• • - V -'x e ' " • * sKNlt •««•« ©• Pollcteg deposited ^ I f Approved Securities with the State of |owa, who acts as your Trustee. •Mb* 'V 4-ji *' Am. ̂ x!S ,\kk%z^ "t & & ' ^"3?% < t / * " ' ̂ ' *'* ̂ ̂" I ••*€••?£