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u 1 ii"> 1 - A roundTi he Gard e c » Instructor - Ornamental Horticulture McHenry County College "I like plants as much as the next guy; but, as Charlie Brown would say, 'Good Grief! My wife has turned our home into a veritable jungle. We have reached the point,where, if she adopts me more species, I truly believe that I will be forced to start moving ' our utilitarian type objects like chairs, books, and glasses to the garage. Why, as it stands now, available floor space is practically limited to three foot wide paths running through every, room. Last year for Christmas, I, in jest, suggested that she buy me a machete so I could keep these avenues open, and free of foliage. Sounds ridiculous doesn't it? Well, let me tell you that the big knife has really' become a necessity. The denseness of foliar growth in our house, I am certain, would not be put to shame if com­ pared to the lushest tropical jungle. All we lack are a few wild animals, and a native tribe or two. "You know, I would not mind v if she limited her collection to one healthy specimen of each species, and, in .fact, have dropped strong hints along those lines. When it comes to plants, however, my words fall "on deaf ears." At last count, we, and I use the word in the loosest sense, owned twenty- seven coleus, thirty-three African violets, six aphelandra, and, at least, forty-two poin- settias. The total collection runs well over 400 individuals. "I beseech you, help me, please. My wife reads your column weekly, and faithfully follows your advice. Would you kindly drive home the idea that a three-bedroom house in a north temperate climate is not a suitable location for even a somewhat scaled down model of the Amazon jungle. By way of illustrating the excess to which her plant mania is carried, do you remember recommending the use of fish emulsion as a good all purpose house plant fertilizer? Well, I will not tell you that she made ^ her own, because that crazy she is not; but, did you know that from a certain company, the material can be purchased in fifty gallon drums. Really, we have got one, suitably screened by foliage, of course, in our basement. I will assure now that any words spoken in my behalf are greatly ap­ preciated." Truly, I sympathize with your dilemma. • The all too common syndrone you described is typical of a disease I like to call "jungleitis." Unfortunately, no vaccine or curative drugs have yet been developed. I will most certainly speak in your behalf. Let me begin by listing the uses, I feel, plants serve in the home: Basically, plants provide a means of introducing dif­ ferences in texture and shape into the decor. They are har­ monizing units, capable of tying in or unifying the various component pieces of a room, or, indeed, all the rooms of a dwelling. The latter is a reflection of the consistency plants are capable of providing. After all, there is a place for a plant in every room. Specific pieces of furniture, on the other hand, are limited in their placement. One would, for example, never consider placing a sofa, no matter how small in the kitcheiK On an even more restricted level, plants provide a reaSon to use certain pieces. A jar­ diniere, regardless how at­ tractive, always seems to look somewhat out of place when empty. Why? Because the function for which the piece was designed is not being carried out. Plant and planter are a unit. One would never consider placing a plant on a table without the clay, plastic, or styrafoam pot in which it is growing. Although admittedly extremely difficult, with special care, at least a few species could be grown in such an unnatural manner. Why, then, consider displaying a naked planter? More than any other form of life, plants provide the unique opportunity to introduce the lush touch of Nature into our homes. Although a white blanket of snow now covers the earth, and all woody plants, save the evergreens now ap­ pear as so many broomsticks, through the use of flowering and foliage plants we are able to possess a "breath of spring" year-round. Thus, though the sun has not yet reached the horizon when we wake for work, and the cold winter winds blow menacingly, we can surround ourselves with lustrous, rich green leaves, and gaily colored flowers. In order to properly serve these functions, however, the specimens used must be respectable. Remember first that no living thing, be it plant or animal, is immortal. Con­ sidering the generally less than optimum environmental or, if you will, climatic conditions characteristic of most homes, mine included, the realistic life span of a given plant does not come close to those in the wild. Only by mimicking the natural setting of a species can we hope to keep the plant growing lushly. Light, water, relative humidity, and nutrient levels are the strict variables with which we must deal. Our success, or green thumb. then depends solely on our ability to imitate the natural order. Any variance or deviation On our part is symp- tomatically displayed by growth deformities of our plants. Meeting all these requirements frequently takes more time and money than we are willing to spend. Special lights and humidifiers are, after all, quite expensive. The result is as simple as it is predictable: Lacking certain conditions under which they normaly grow, the typical house plant gradually declines. is, of course, not to say it if you purchase a plant tomorrow it will be dead within a week, or month. No statement on my part would be farther from the truth. What I am saying is that one cannot reasonably expect any given plant to prosper indefinitely indoors. (Naturally, some species are more adaptable than others, and over the next couple of weeks, we will be spending ojjr time discussing the various attributes and drawbacks of a wide range of plants.) A particular plant need not die to outlive its usefulness. Remember, a weed is simply defined as "a plant out of place." Thus, a scraggly in­ dividual growing in a highly decorative container is really not serving its function and, therefore, in essence, may legitimately be classified as a weed. I can still recall my dear late grandmother becoming extremely upset when I discarded, what I considered to be a useless individual from my collection. "Why are you throwing it PAGE 13- out? The plant is still living. Can't you save it?" In order to calm her down, I would promptly make her a present, and so, off she would go with another patient for her ever expanding flora hospital. The decision, of course, as to exactly when a particular plant does indeed become obsolete, is highly personal. Faced with severe space limitations, I, in my own mind, could not justify the continued allotment of room to specimens that were simply not responding to my tender loving care. So many TURN ONS McHENRY PLA1NPEALER - WEDNESDAY. FEBRUARY 13,1D74 interesting species are available, that why should I clutter up the place with suf­ fering individuals. By gradually adding to, and changing my plants, my collection reflected the dynamic, ever shifting equilibrium characteristic of Mother Nature. Impossible Dream? My wife had a wonderful dream last night. She dreamed that the Joneses were trying to keep up with us! YOU GOT CAUGHT IN AM ENEfaev CRUNCH? INTO THE SIPE OF A MCVirvIO TROCK. FRAN KLI N BONUS BUY! BONUS BARGAINS! REGULAR EVERYDAY BUYS! All Add Up To BONUS SAVINGS! THURS. - FRI. - SAL - SUN. SPECIALS! tt OZ. AIR FRESH NR Reg. 79c 2 KING SIZE NESTIFS BARS a Reg. ^5c Limit 3 ' LIQUID N00U1E Reg. i.n IND. & OUTDOOR RU6 RUNNER Reg. 24"x70" Reg. 3.99 » HR. 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