The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

A AA._4 .._..~..__._._.__..-.. _.... ___â€"â€"â€"â€"o. :6. HEALTH. 1, Boxing The Esra. lectc is a certain class of cases that from time to time come under the aurist's care. in which .hc serious, offensive and at times even fatal res x ts of that pernicious and objec- tiona" 1»; form of correction or amusement, boxing the ears. are forcibly illustrated ; and from what has lately come to my notice I czmnot but think that this is another item in the bill of indictment. against the present cram and over-pressure syst:m in vogue at 0.1!" c :imols. THE STUEIACH AND SUZUATI'JX. A poor. scrofulous-lm)king child, perhaps not normally too bright, from general ill- hcalth and not infrequent semivstarvation (for it often happens that from the morning breakfast of dry bread and tea to the evening mud of the same luxurious and nourishing l mats: ials these poor little atoms of humanity have to go without food) is rendered on some occzisivns incapable of fixing the attention or in any way mastering the most ordinary of tasks, iiich he would quickly learn another day, v» 3‘ n perhaps an extra meal or a rather more sznnpzuons breakfast is the moving power. '1 i c teacher. annoyed that the child Ls nu: going to pass the standard examina- llnli, :;..-l .-..iributihg to obstinacy and wilful innittcntinn that which is due really to physical inability. has recourse to the book ‘ or pointer, should he have them in his . hand: (‘2' employs the palm. should it be 1 | c:.ip:y~ with what rcsult‘.l Certainly not increasing the pupil's aptitude for acquiring knowledge, and most likely ruining the child‘s future career by rendering him deaf, or obje :tionable from a fwtid discharge, if , he do is not contribute to his early death ; for i'. is especially in these cases of half- starve l, serofulous, or phthisically dispos- ed children that a membrane ruptured or inflamed from a box on the car is liable to run into a state of chronic suppura- ti-ni, with the consequences to be presently ' . wile-d. lupture of the drum-head from i g the cars occurs, I am sure, muchl more often than is generally supposed, for, not infrequently, when these children come , for l.l'.:.Lllllt¢lll. for the “running from thcl ear," the original cause of the disease is for- gotten, and only remembered on strict cross-cxamination; while in the strong, healthy boy at one of our public Schools, ! \vcll fed, and with a good constitution, living . in purer air, and with plenty of health- giving exercise, should the membrane be ruptured from this cause, it frequently heals at once, with little or no pain ; or the pain, if "rout, only lasts for a short time, and no w thcr notice is taken of it though some ed to as high a temperature as it can be drunk or sippa‘i, above 10'" but no: to the boiling print, is of great value as a refreshing stimu- lant in cases of over greatâ€"exertion, bodily or mental. To most people who like milk, it does not taste so good hot, but that is a small matter compared with the benefit to be got from it. Its action is exceedingly prompt and grateful. and the effects much more satisfactory and far more lasting than those of any alcoholic drink whatever. It supplies real strength as well as exhiliration which alcohol never doesâ€"Good 11011;:- l‘ieping. For diphtheritic sore throat. use the fol- lowing : One teaspoonful of flour of sulphur dissolved in a wine glass of cold water. Put the sulphur into~ the glass first and pour on a very little water, add together with the finger, than fill the glass with water. Sulphur will not mix with water easily and itis necessary to use the finger in place of a spoon. (largle the throat well with this mixture, allowing some to be swallowed. Repeat very three or four hours-until the white spots disappear. If the throat is too sore to permit a gargle to be used. let some one take dry sulphur in a quill and blow it into the throat of the patient. Cripplcs are so common a sight in every- day life. says Dr. J. P. Bissell. in [hilly/loath that unless our attention is arrested by an aggravated case, we pass them dailv with our feelings would surely be aroused if we realized that most of these cases are due to the neglect of some one who had charge of them in theirearly years. A fair-amountofcare and consideration (after proper instruction, perhaps-l, on the part of mother or nurse or these maimed ones in their infancy, would, in all probability, have made the difference de- twacn a human being capable of earning , ,.. . p W m w . ~ . m 'sician tneie .' Jei. \m. -s. hardly more than a sympathetic look. 3 et, \1 society, and a miserable, decrepit, de- fenseless creature, dependent upon the counnunity for its livelihood and upon charity for existence. The greater number of deformities begin in infancy and child- hood. The most important of all the varieties of lameness, because of its fre- quency and because of the serious and even fatal results which often follow it, is that belonging to disease of the hip joint. It comes on gradually, without apparent cause, getting better or entirely disappear- ing at times, to return again later, and in a more marked form each' time, but lulling the victim and its relatives into a sense of false security, until it is too late. In this common bone intlannnation, the earlier it is discovered, the greate' are the chances of recovery without abscess or deformity. A moderate amount of knowledge on this sub- ject would have taught the mother that at the first suspicions of trouble in walking, ‘n ' .- .‘ :1 - :' in tie - l””‘ "1 lu‘uma pm"! m") Lystifinf .1 j the child ought to have been placed under ncuds bc sown of further car misc no in t 10 the Observation “f some one cumpetent ,0 future. “hen the cars are boxed it. is, I presiune. generally supposed, if any consid- eration is given at all, that the auriclcs are the only parts that suffer. No thought is "'vcn to the fact that a great concussion Q‘. of the air in the externalauditory mcatus is caused when the entrance is suddenly o .‘cltllcil, as by a blow with the palm of the irmd. This concussion forces the drum. held suddenly backwards, and thus, not- witlntamling the great resisting power of the tvniraizic membrane (Huiber‘s experiments oh .L~\ll'lllll-lltjllll which had been in spirit showed that it took a column of mercury 143 ctins. high to break it), rupture will at times occur. aild this is more especially the case awares. \thn a vent has thusbccnproduc- ed a m )l‘L‘ or less acute inflammation of the drum-held sets in, causing pain, which at times is most. severe. This inflammation and pain will quickly disappear, and the rupture heal, if prompt and proper treat- ment is employed ; and at times, as I stated meat at all. :izst'ur or NHHLHTED Till-:A’FMHS'I‘. H nut, on the other hand. if neglected, the lllilillllllldllhl‘. may spread to the tympanic cavity, and a chronic suppuration, with deafness and its other attendant miseries and fatal results. ensue. Thus adhesive b mils m-zy be. thrown across the tympanum, tightly binding down the membrane: mas ‘ hlr‘ ;;i.‘.y attack the temporal bone in any of its component parts. the brain and its mcm- brauc»: may become implicated, and mening- itis. ccrcbral and cerebellar or subdural :ibsrc.<.~'.'s, u' tpsy, or insanity may result. Facial punk . may occur and becmne permanent. 'l be large blood-vessels may lw-ozzm atl'ccted, producing phlcbitis and thrombosis of the lateral sinus, and so caus~ in}; metastatic abscesses in the lungs, liver, n‘.‘ kidney. from small pieces of the clot, ll‘.‘t‘;tl‘.il!l__’ oil‘ and being carried into the cir- «‘ ilation. blocking the small vessels. Oran ulceiaiivc process may ensue, extending to the large vessels. which may bccou e eroded, and fatal ha-morrhage result. l’ya-mia may also be caused by the absorption of putrid mit: d. The more serious and fatal of the. above have a greater tendency to develop should a chronic suppuration exist at the time the blow is received : for although this condition might go on for years without prxn uring fatal consequences. the extra stimulus of the acute attac ' brought on by the bluw is enough to start any oueof thum- lllil‘.L cranial complications which have such :5 endings. ' With such a formidable list of evils loom- ing 1le the horizon every one must ackow- bulge that the old proverb, "prevention is lu'l'u‘l‘ than cure," particularly applies to tliwe cast-s; but should a hasty temper get tip.- l:~t:~.~r of discretion. and in an unguard- l d moment the mischief be done. no time “my: be lost. and the car should be seen as 5mm as possible by a competent medical man: I lay great stress on the cmupetent~or, as on old teacher of mine used in say when he . “nod to emphasiseanything. “l'ut forty- five scratches under it"- ~and mean a man w.:o has practically studied diseasu of the ctr: for even in these enlightened days, when the knowledge of auml surgery is 'in- creasing by leaps and bounds, mulical men in large practice and mast competent in in other Iraurhes of the profession are still to l-e found who know nothing whatever of the simplest forms of ear trouble. and who even advise their patients tu do nothing to sup a discharge from that organ. mving 1223.: i: "as salutary rather than otherwise -~ .-. doctrine Du Verney disputed over 200 years ago.w-\\'.R.H. Stewart. Aural Sur- gw :. tin-at Northern Central Hospital, London. ,. duals! rw‘ The Domestic Doctor- :2r‘...~':~.:cn the eyes bylaihin; them in cold 3 w any and always press them toward tin: j :zus» when drying. , it is Wurllty of miter-stint "m not; pm: u. n... . . l when the. blow has taken the recipient un- above. it may cure itself without any treat- ‘ told disease may he not up. C'll'lES and nccro. \10 Gill-uni“); gals gully“. judge of the condition and the necessity of treating it. LIGHTED BY GAS mom WOOD. A Canadian Town That l'tinzes the Viasto Product ot’flt‘r Saw Mills. A correspondent of the N. Y. Sun thus describes the process of manufacturing gas from wood by which the darkness at Deser- onto is relieved :â€" Onc day last Week a stranger came to town and said that over in Canada he had . seen a whole town, Descronto, that was il- luminated by gas made by distilling wood instead of coal. The facts as he relatesl them are interesting. The. gas plant consists of a series of cast- iron cylinder placed like boilers in a brick furnace. Near one end of each cylinder is a big hopper. The hoppers are kept filled with sawdust brought from a bin by an end- less screw that works in a wooden trough. From the hopper the sawdust is conducted by other serevs through iron pipes into the retort. There it is taken by another Screw and pushed along to the rear end. Because of the. heat of the retort all of the volatile matters in the. sawdust are driven oil, and the wood becomes charcoal, when it is ready to be discharged through a pipe at the rear of the retort. "l‘he gas passes through pipes from the Lof: oi the retort to purifiers. such as are used in Lime is the chief constituent of the purifiers. It comes out with an odor not very much like that from bituminous coal. It smells more like smoke from an outdoor i-irc than anvthinw else. * i o The to vn of Dcscronto consumes about 9.0.000 cubic feet of gas a day. To produce, this requires the distilling of twu tons of dry sawdust. A Cord of hard vim-d furnishes sul‘iicicnt fuel to do the work. (lineman is employed to keep the fires going and do the heavier work, and one stout boy is required to assist him. The sawdust costs nothing but transportation from the mills. Tests of the lights of ordinary gas burners Show that the gas is from 1'2 to 15 candle power. varying with the sort of Wood distil- ed. Oily woods give the higher power, of course. “ It is commonly supposed," said the man from whom these facts were obtained, “that wood is inferior to coal as a gas producer. hit out of 100 pounds of coal they get 65 pounds of Coke, while from 100 pounds of dry wood they get but '20 pounds of charcoal. They get, therefore. only 35 pounds of vola- tile matter from the \‘0.ll to $0 from the Wood. There is a coal tar produced from the wood, as well as from the coal. It is burned as fuel in llcseronto, but it could be worked over into many sorts of products. llut the chief advantage of the sawdust plant is in the small amount of manual labor required. 'l'herc is no other plant of the size in the World that is run by a man and a boy. The gas does not cost to exceed 40 c ~nts a thousand feet. I am told." Thong ts on Denominationa‘ism. The subject of dcnominati:malisxn is being discussed in the religious journals. Denomi. nationalism is all right, pr wided it be kept within the limits of charity. A generous rivalry does no harm-1he rivalry of faith and good works. Mormver. each denomi- nation aets forth in a distinctive way some more or less essential featur :.~ of the truth. No one has it all, but eath t_\ pcs I311“: phase which is necdful to the synme ry of truth. It is only by correlating and ulr‘n’ctuiling to. gethcrtherepresent.“ivcdenominations. that \vcgct the whole truth. Truth is a wheel of which the Respective denominations are the spokes. One spoke doesn't make a wheelâ€"it takes all. But the trouble is that the various spokts are apt to forget their mutual depend- ence, and to set upon each one as being the entire whet-l. Ale tor Containing 339‘ .‘JCO was sin tr. in transit between Pestn am. \ act: 3.. 1: «ax-.5 "llh' lcttc? tin: never 3- 71-3." a living and a useful and happy member of ‘ CURIOUS BBLES. A mt of Strange‘ Errors That Have Crop! into Various Translations. Although the greatest care has been taken to make the various editions of the Bible perfect translations. still errors have been overlooked from time to dine. and have given rise to various mines by which the edition containing the L'Tl‘UiS has become known. The following list of these curious Bibles is extracted from an article in the Leisure Hour by \l'. \Vright, D. D. : THE unaficurs mum; “ Then the eyes of them both were open- ed, and they knew that they were naked, and they sewed tigge tree leaves together and made themselves Breeches," Gen. iii. 7. Printed inll5b'0. Tut: lira mum-1. “ that thou shalt not ncde to be afraid for any Buggas by nighte, nor for the arrow that fl'ycth by day." I’s. xci. 5. Printed in 15151. Death of the Stlé‘. A stately stag comes down to drink Beside the mountain lakclet‘sbrink Amund him towering to the skies The brown Sierras sharply rise. T his is the haunt of sil ‘nce ; here Dwellsjoneliness akin to fear, And N the stag with agile tread Crosses that ragged lava bed, The careful putting of his feet lut makes the stillness more complete. “'hat means this utter dearth of sounds? Are these the happy hunting grounds? Now gracefully the neck of him, So beautiful, so sleek. so slim. llends bowlikc, till at last he sips The crystal tide with velvet lips. One moment, and the spell is past l His antlercd head on high is cast : His thin red nostrils sniff the air, As though it said to him “ Bcwarc l" A moment thus, and then a quick And nervous sound, a warning “click”â€" Thc four hard hoofs together mct Sharp as a Spanish castanet. Away ! away I at every spring A shower of pebbles round him ring. He falls, rolls overâ€"now again Is rattling down the rocky glen. Hone like a flash, and silence now Sifts down from cliff and mountain brow. The silence grows. \Yhat ailcd the stag? No grizzly looms against you crag. Grim, clumsy, ponderous and gaunt ; Here is no mountain lion’s haunt ; No city hunter and his hound This rocky fastness yet has found. Ah, none of these ! And yet the deer Had sudden cause for dircst- fear, For yonder, up the rough ravine, A runner comes, brown, lithe and lean ; A jwrfect’athletc, trained as one \l’ho in Olympic games would run. Stark naked, save for sandals tied leneath his feet, thin strips of hide ; Unarmed, save that his fingers cl:in A long, keen knife in bony grasp. Gods, what a runner ! Deep of chest, And all his muscles at their bestâ€"- See how above the skin they rise, As every move their temper tries ! How free his action ! Slightly bent, His eyes upon the ground intent, Hc moves along with easy swing, A Mercury who needs no wing ; Yet. not too fast, but more as one “he wins the race before ’tis run. This is the primal hunter, this The man whose weapons never miss-â€" The runner of New Mexico, Clitl‘~<l\vclling Candelario. His half-starved dog before him goes, Leading the way with faithful nose. The stag is doomed, for never back Turns Uandclario from the track. All day through canyon dai and deep, 'lllirough mountain passes, rugged, steep, Up walls of rock more wild and sheer Than ever clomb Swiss mountaineer ; And over plains of scrub mesquite He follows with untiring feet. He sleeps upon the trai atfjnight] And starts again at graycst light. Vllnt one such other hunter's name In all this world is known to fame, Or c'cr was shaped of human breath, And such a one, I ween, is ]) *a’th. Hc follows so each mortal wight, So camps upon the trail at night, Sure that his game, if slow or fast, M ust weary of the flight at last. Three days are gone since first. began That. race betwvecn the deer and man, A noble course, and nobly run l The better animal has won: And now the stag, tired, hungry, weak, His hair no longer smooth and slick, But tricklin r sweat and (lasted gray, Stands came y 'aiting, brou vht to bay. His antlbred head is bonded ow, And near the ground swings to and fro : His eyes, though shot with streaks of gore, Blaze fierce defiance all the more. Not long he waits, for soon there glides Into the opening where he hides A naked runner, brown and lean, Ulntching a knife, long, wicked, keen. Then each the other quickly spies, And first the ' wage a war of eyes, The hunter, mulling at the hips, Vitli twitching hands and parth lips, Glide: waivhfully arougd and rollle The stag that turns, but holds his ground, Disdaining, though he often feels ‘he starved cur snapping at. his heels. Some moments thus, and then at last The snarling mongrel seizes fast Upon the deor’s hock ; mad with pain, The forest monarch leaps in vain ; He leaps, ho stamps, he turns his head-â€" Swift as a shaft from bowstring sped, The swarthy hunter forWard springs, His left hand to an antler clings, I-Iis right. the gleamin r weapon wields. The stag sways to and ro, he yields, He slowly shrinks to earth, his 'ore Smokes on the ground, and a l is o'er ! And all is o'er, but who would check The Indiau's joy, as on the nch Kneeling, lm swings his knife on high, And wakes the hills with one will cry? -â€"[Gr.oncn lion'rox. 'rnr. T11EA"‘1.E unl.r.. “ Is there not treacle at Gilead? Is there no physician tlicr ' 2'" Jcr. viii. '22. Print- ed in 150s. an. roux mnmz. “Is there no rosin in (iilcad ': Is there no Printed in 1609. THE i'I.ACiz-.\l.-\KHI'.'5 mum; “Blessed are the place makers ; for they shall be called the children of God.” Mat. v. 9. Printed in 1561-2. THE \‘lNEGAl: mum; “The Parable of the Vinegar," instead of “The Parable of the Vineyard," appears in the chapter-heading to Luke xx. in an Oxford edition of the authorized version which was published in 1717. THE “'ICKED BIBLE. This extraordinary name has been given to an edition of the authorized Bible, printed in London by Robert Barker and Martin Lucas in 1631. The negative was left out. of the Seventh Commandment, and \\ illiam Kilburne, writing in 1650, says that, owin to the zeal of Dr. Usher, the printer was fined £12,000 or £3,000. THE EAlis-To-rsn BIBLE. ET“ “he hath ears to car, let him hear.” Mathew xiii. 43. Printed in 1810. THE STANDING-l-‘ISill-ZS BIBLE. “ And it shall come to pass that the fishes will stand upon ” etc. Ezek. XLYH. 10. Printed in 135}. TIIE;I)ISCHAI:G£ BIBLE. “I diseharge thee before God.” I. Tim, v. '31. Printed in 1806. Tim \vIFn-im'rl-zn BIBLE. “ If any man come to me, and hate not his father . . . yea, and his own Wife also,”cto. Luke xiv. ‘26. Printed in 1310. naixnksii’scxums mum). “ And Rebekah arose, and her camcls.’ Genesis xxiv. 61. Printed in 1323. TO-lll-ZMAIS mum; “ Persecuted him that the spirit to remain, Gal. iv. '29. This typographical error, which was perpetuated in the first 8m lliblc printed for the Bible Society, iakesits chief 1m- portancc from the curious Circumstances under which it arose. A 121m) Bible was being printed at. Cambridge In 1803, and the proof-reader being in doubt as to whether or not. he should remove a comma, applied to his superior, and the reply pencilled on the margin “ to remain,” was transferred to the body of the text and repeated in the Bible Society’s Svo edition of 1805-6, and also in another l'Zmo edition of 1810. was born after cvcnso it is now. W Talking at Table. " There is no end to the modes of conduct-l ing table talk as a means of child education, says the “ Sunday School Times; and there no end to the influence of table talk in this direction, however conducted. Indeed, it may be said with ruth that table talk is quite as‘likely in be influential as, a means of child training when the pale-iii! llltYG 110 i thought. of using it to this end, as when they seek to use it accordingly. At every family table there is sure to be talking: and the talk that is heard at the family table is sure to have its part in a child’s t 'aining, whether the parents wish it to be so or not. There are fathers whose table talk is chiefly in criticism of the mother’s method in man- aging the household. There are mothers who are more uivcn to asking where on earth their children learned to talk and actas they do, than to enquiring in what part of the earth the most important archmological dis- coveries are just now in progress. And there are still more fathers and mothers whose table talk is'wholly between themselves, ex- cept as they turn aside occasionally, to say sharply to their little ones : “ll'liy dont you keep still, children, while your father and mother are talking 3" All this table talk has its influence on children. It leads them to have less respect for their parents, and less interest in the home table except as a place for satisfying their natural lmn rer. M , dm .‘ ,l I" “mth Mun. H 1., rim“ It is potent, even though it be not protita lie. in t3, _ "L1: '1 l’ 15‘s. w 1,”; r‘ fl“ 3s. f“ “m , Table talk ought to be such, in every , . .lf’v n ,"l rm ,3/1‘ , 1‘ d r j‘_~l familv, as to make the hour of home meal C‘mm’ "'lwlmw U M 3"? if!“ Tum Pun . - v _. . . V , _ _, I V to me by the late Dr. \\ aklcy, editor of the time one of the most attiactne as well as 1 , , M h . . . one of the most beneficial hours of the dov lmmz' “ho WM a firm“ U'xmmsgcm m to all the children. lint in order to make table talk valuable parents must have some- thing to talk about at the table, must- be willing to talk about it there and must have the children lovingly in mind as they do their table talking. â€"â€"â€"_.-*â€"â€"â€"-‘_ Married in Haste. A German engine-dri'.‘er had plightcd his troth to a young lady whose parents would not hear of the ex ' gcmcnt. The lovch concerted a scheme for the attainment of their wishes. It was arranged that she should accompany her parents on a holiday trip, and, during the journey, she left the carriage under some pretext or other, and made her way to the engine where her sweetheart was waiting for her. The driver at once backed the train into a siding, un- cou fled the engine, and the lovers, together with the stokcr, ran on at full speed to the next station, where a clergyman, who had been duly notified, married the pair, and the new couple retumed as quickly as they had come, to the spot where the impatient travellers had been shunted. The engine was again coupled to the train which pro- ceeded on its way as if nothing had hopper» ed. Meantime the news spread like wild- fire among the passengers ; they congrat- ulated the parents on the happy event. and the latter wisely decided t-i pick" their feelings anl look pleaanz. l _â€"â€"â€"-â€"â€"â€"â€"- A Pu: oanins. (logs. lie is devotcdly attached to my baby, and always iicconipaliics no i 1 my morning visit to the nursery. (in one occas- ion thc child (who is just as fond of him as he is of her) was Very ill, and for three weeks was unvarmscious. As soon as this was the cane, the dog ceased to go near the nursery as if by instinct he knew he would not be noticed. Mr. \anters. from Rowling. was attending the baby, and the «log soon not to know the time he paid his visits. 1' c would watch him upstairs, and when he came down listen most attentively to his report. At len th the child was pronounCcdout of danger. he very next morning up Went Master “Sam,” made his way straight to the child's cot, and stood rm his hind legs to be caressed. Although she had taken no notice of any- one for some time, she seemed to know the do 1, and tried to move her hand toward him Ulfiw licked. He quite understood the ac- tion, licked the little hand lovin ly, and then trotted contentcdly away. A tcr this he went up to she her regularly, as he had been accustomed to do. S ring millinery will be profusely ornate with) gold and silver and other metallic braids. einbroiilerics and ornaments. ‘vhnltfiillqgrj gopdn; men my a,“ jibe Southern turn 5! mcrmsing, and will soon rival that of tho “'cst. In a Tiger‘s Jaws. Russian hunters are said to look upon a combat single-handed with a bear as onl an ordinary experience. It is doubtf ho waver, if many instances of a man attack- ing a ti on, armed with a sword only. canbe voucher for, but Colonel Seaton relates the following : One morning, just as we were leaving the arade grount , a man came rushing u reathless, looking as scared as if his 1' were in danger. “ Get your guns, men,” he said in termr. “there is a tiger in the hollow by the fakir‘s but and no one dares go by 2" This was an intimation not to be sli vhtcd, so in all haste we got. our guns am two elephants and hurried to the spot, where, in truth, a terrible scene presented itself. The tiger, bleeding frbm a cut. in the head. was on the edge of the hollow, growling fiercely, with a man mangled and apparently dead lying beneath his iaws. The unfortun- ate man was the fakirs son, a fine swords- man and firstvrate wrestler, one of the cham- pions of his regiment. He had come home only that morniu . Some pco 1e w 10 went to draw water at. the well but disturbed the tiger and on his rising they fled in terror. The brave but. rash soldier, who happened to be near at the moment, on learning the cause of the commo- tion, iuuucdiatcly advanced to attack the tiger, and with his sword ave him a tremen- dous cut over the head, w \ich, however, did not materially injure the powerful brute. The tiger rushed at the man, stripped the arm down to the elbow and, dashing him to the ground, held him beneath his paws. \Vhen we came up we were at first at a loss how to act, for the man was as much exposed to our fire as the tiger. However, it was not a time for lengthened considera- tionâ€"â€"we fired and a lucky shot finished the an! ial. â€"_â€".â€"â€"-.â€"-â€"â€"â€"I A Forty-Dollar Joke. If a prominent physician over in the north- west. hasn’t 'at. even with one practical joker then it. ( oesn't lie in the telling. The physician lives in a very modern establishâ€" ment. Not only is there a special night. hell, but a speaking tube con- nects the doorstcps with the head of his bed. The practical joker has had fun with this. He has been coming along about 1.30 a. m. and standing on the op )osite corner and laughing until his sides aclied thinking how funny he was and what. a good time he was having. Then he would cross over and ring the night hell and howl up the speak- ing tube as if a whole regiment of mothers- in-law on the next. block had ton-minute cholera and were dying by the wagon load. And the poor, tired doctor would rouse out. of his first. sweet. sleep and “ hello ” down the tube. Then the funny man would say ; “ Docs Dr. Jâ€"livc here ‘2" “ Yes.” “ Have you lived here long?” “ For twenty years. \Vlio are you? \Vhat. the blazes do you want '2” “ J est want to know why you don’t. move- That‘s all. Ta! in l” ' And then the funny man bounces down into the street and scoots home, where he laughs for half an hour straight. He didn‘t laugh half so much the other night. The doctor was loaded for him. He knew that laugh and that yell and he stuck a funnel in the tube and poured in two quarts of aquafortis, Stafl'ord’a indelible ink, liquid lyc and a few chemical wliill's of torment. It gurgled and gurgch for one second and then struck Dofunny in the mug just. as he opened his mouth for another howl. It came with a thirty foot fall and a ten pound pressure to the square inch. He sv allowed a pint before he could get. his mouth shut and the impromptu hose played all over his face and silk hat and shirt front and dress suit. It. was a roof- ~aiser and curled him like a cockroach on a. hot shovel. I T‘ It will cost the doctor $10 for dumbing, l but he grins ovary time be thin s of it.â€" [ll'aahington Pout. â€"â€"â€"â€"â€"--â€".-â€"â€"-â€"â€"-â€" 110 Faslfionnble God. \Vc find the following lines in the Afar-- chant ’j'rm-eller. They contain more truth i than poetry : j A fashionable Woman In a fashionable pew ; A fashionable bonnet ()f a fashionable hue ; A fzushionriblo mantle And a fashionable gown ; A fashionable Christian 0 In a, fashionable town ; A fashionable prayer book And a fashionable choir ; A fashionable chapel \l'ith a fashionable spire ; A fashionable preacher ll'ith a fashionable speech ; A fashionable sermon With a fashionable reach ; A fashionable welcome , At the fashionable door; Afashionable pcnn ' For the fashionable poor; A fashionable heaven And a fashionable hell ; A fashionable lliblc For this fashionable belle; A fashionable kneeling And a fashionable nod; A fashionable everything; lut no fashionable God, __-â€"â€".â€"â€"-â€"â€" Her Majesty's Turtle. Among the delicacies which graced Queen Victoria’s table at Christmas was a turtle 100 years of age, which had been brought from the Ascension Island a week previously by the Government cruiser “'ye. So thoroughly did her Majcst enjoy the Hon 1 produced from the fat of t it: reptile that the Wye it“ just been despitchcd to Aaccnsiou-w a dis- tance of many thousand miles ~~for a further sup )ly of turtles. It is not everyone who is t us able to make use of a man-of-war for the purpose of gratifying an inordiiutt: cmv- ng for turtle soup. A Hard Question. “ Mamma," said Johnny, “can anybody hear with their mouth 2" “ No, child, I don't. think they can," re- plied the ungmmmatioal mother. “ Then, mamma, what made M r. Jones tell sister he wanted to tell her something. and put his lips to her mouth, 1: tend of her ears ‘3" ' Tl 0 mother didn't question Johnny, but tprned her attention to Mr. Joace, and that Worthy made it all right by the proper ex- yhmanona. .45: . .N‘...» . W ‘ .“vu~n -inaa'r" «I»; 3‘85"