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a}; Mr. Jimsmith Bepnlses an Agent. ’ Mr. Jimsmith, the lawyer, whose rame is a honsthold word in Chicago, recently mat-ed into a beautiful suburb- an home. He is highly pleased with it in a general way, but so many agents call upon him that he finds it rather a bore. The other day he opened the door to 12 agents before the afternoon was half ever, and when he was sum- moned to the door for the thirteenth time he was mad enough to fight a herd of porcupines. A tall, sadeyed man, dressed in black, confronted him and started to say something, but Mr. Jim- amith interrupted him: “You don't need to tell me what you have to sell, because I don't want it; I don't need a burglar proof clock. nor a bootjack that has a. music box in it, nor a stem winding can opener: I don't" “ My dear sir. you are mis" “Oh, you don't need to ‘dear sir’ MILLINEHY HILLINERY Jlfrs. H6810! Ila: a splendid stock of JIIzY/z'nery for Me Spring- !raa’e, to whch t/ze attenliorz of fizmzdz'ng' pur- c/tasers is invited. WALL PAPER WALL PAPER A 1 Me Lowest Prices. WINDOW PAPER ~ FANCY GOODS tro ' it won't work. 1 tell you I don’t "ATEBIALS vatit a gate that may be taken from its FOR FANCY WORK hinges and used as a folding bed; I have TOYS no u~e for a combined currycomb and mustache cup; I have a full supply of furniture polish, cough medicine and lair rcstorer. and, what's more, my wife doesn't need a recipe for preserving cod- fish or frying billiard balls." “ Really, air, this is a most extra- ordinary " ' “ Oh, of course, it's extraordinary. but I don't want it. I suppose it can be used to grate horse radish and tune the piano, but I tell you that I don't need it. Perhaps it will take the grease spots out of clothing, pare apples and chase dogs out of the yard, but you‘ll have to go somewhere else to sell it. I am surprised that a man of your age Five and aJinn-1391‘ cent- and res ectable a earance should to Parties wishina' to borrow on these terms P , PD 3 o . . around trying to sell pocket oornsl-ellera Should not delfly to make . appllcollon- when the whole neighborhood is full of Lime “moug.” 0: funds’.“ Slightly h'gh" ' 1 I'll es, flCCOI‘ Illg 0 SECIII'lIy. it most C3588 wood that oni‘hs to be “wed‘ “that S solicitor work is done at my office, insuring the use of trying to sell a man a fire I k I d speed and moderate expenses. $133; ,3"; ’°“ m m“ ° 8 “ “’ Allan s. Macdonell. “ I'm not. an agent." “ Then what are you ?" “I'm the pastor of the Orthodox Brethren church, and I came over to get acquainted, not knowing that you ware runningr a private madhouse. Good day."-â€"-Chicago Tribune. IN GREAT VARIETY STAEPIHG DONE Eggs Take}: in Exchange. MRS. FIEELEY. MONEY TO LOAN. I have recently had a considerable, though limited, suru of money placed with me for loaning on forms at LINDSAY Marble Works. R. CH'KrirBERs as is prepared to furnish the people of Lind- say and surrounding country with MONUMENTS AND HEADSTONES, both Marble and Granite. .. Waiting Was His Forte. Six months ago a clothing dealer on Jefferson avenue put a lot of summer vests in the front window and marked each one at seventy-five cents. They hadn't been on display buta day or two before a young farmer entered and looked them over and said: “I want one of them, but seventy- p, five 00028 "is tOO much. I'll give you WORKSâ€"In rear 0 the market on Cam- Sixty." bridge street, opposite Matthews‘ pa:king Estimates promptly given on all kinds of cemetery Work Marble Table Tops, Wash Tops, Mantel eces, t-tc., a specialty. Blacksmithingu nllits did‘ercnthranchee done on short notice and at the lowest living prices. Particulnrnttention paid in horse-shoeing. Give me a calland I will Iv“ guarantee satisfaction. 45-ly. HAnness m-SADDLES-m â€" ATâ€" ]OHN BERRY’S ....KENT-ST-,.... m-LINDSAY--m EVERYTHING BELONGING TO THE SADDLERY AND tl \lINI'TSS TRADE CONSTA N'I'ItY KEPT lN STUCK. His offer was refused and he walked Imus?- , l k n h ‘d not. In about a Week he returned, but Being “.I‘mcuc“ W" ""m .“ 5 W h _ k 1’.” fl R a I _I see his desrgns and compare prices before i e m‘“ 0': fuel 5 I rm'd do"! a' y purchasing elsewhere. every woe in las appeare an rcnew- _ ed his offer. Along the. end of August naT- CHAMBERS- he dropped in to observe : North of the Town Hall. It‘s orin a few days to September “ now." “ Yes." “ They all say we are to have an early ..- , Winlt‘l'.' 1:1,: . ‘ “ v n v.12: ' . l”- . . -. cAVEATSJRADE MARKS ‘ Should nt wonder if we would have COPYRIGHTS ' ' ‘I D snow by the middle of September. CAN I OBTAIN A PATENT? For a u I see." piompt answer and an honest opinion. write to ‘ , UhN&co.,wno have badueari tittyyears' “ There won t. be any sale for sum experience inthe patent business. mmunica- ,, tions strictly confidential. AHandbook orIu- mer vests after the lat. gpxégafigcpménilfontgg and hpw to on. re . a 0 echau. “ wragnamTZ." . I O i a e e “ Give you stxty cents for that striped metal nogiceinghe arg‘iggga‘iznlghmericdfifgxig - _ I n 8 are c 009 “Nth 8mm“ d bmmnsr out cost tdoiiiie lozenetdr. Tali-ii; sneleirididic magi. “Couldn‘t do it " Mnedweeklr.eiezantlyilluatrutedmasb arthe . . ' d waft gig-{wanna ostag‘n scientific mgrr in the I v n ., year. 0 00 . ' Give )0“ the c351] “gm own on Building Edition montihlnyhOBassegni-fegingle the null.” on les. '25 cents. liverynumber contains beau- _ " t.i ui plates. in colors. and hotogra he of new it No. Ht figsgs‘iggth planlsmnnpllng tullgfiI'SAfaghnw the . . 8 9 8D sec“ 9 00“ ran “ All right for youâ€"all right l There norm .. NEW YORK, 361 Bnoiggg‘y. is no great hurry about it, and I am a ' ““"' " " ' ' ‘ great band to wait. Feller wanted to D "d b ask me $3.50 for a pair of yaller shoes about two years ago, but I waited and Genera] Blacksmith, got 'cm the other day for ten shillings. _ There's a gal up our way who has bin FranCIS‘S .'., nl‘lon Falls expecting me to ask her to marry me _____ ior the last four years. I may some day, but there's no great rush. Won't take sixty cents to-day, eb ?" u N‘L“ “ All right. That's my limit. call about once a Week from now on, and along uth winter mcbbc you'll come to time. I've got the ynllcr shoes and a red necktie, and I ain't suliering the inn“! mite. I shall be drawing: sand by here all winter, and it won‘t be no trou- bio for me to step in occasionally. If you happen to be looking out of the window as [ drive up, I‘ll hold up six fingers for sixty cents. If it's a go and your bend; it not, shake. Good-day." Yesterday he got the \‘CSI.â€"-D€h‘0it Free l’rrss â€" «u --<--o-oâ€"-â€"â€"â€".â€"â€"â€" \‘lwâ€"“So you are wedded to mu~ sicl" IIcâ€"“ Oh, dear no! 1am too notch in love with it for that."â€"Life. Henml?ctâ€"â€"" I've been carrying the hub). around the floor every night for a wc~ k back." Bachelorâ€"w ('arrying the baby for a ‘ WHY GO TO LINDSAY WHEN YOU CAN DO BETTER BY DEALING AT HOME ‘-2 m ? [AM . . OFFERING A FIRSTELASS TOP BUGGY GUARANTEED BEST GRADE THROUGHOUT, WITH THE LATEST IMPROVEMENTS, FOR THE LOW PRICE OF . . . $75.00. ITS DURABILITY TURNS INFERIOR MAKES “ ABOUT FACE " TO THE REAR. INSPECTION INVITED. i The Inaproved " BUCIC-EX’E ” Phaeton Curt $30.00. NEXT DOOR TO KNUX‘S BLACK- SMITH SHOP, FENELON FALLS. S. S. GAIN EB. KERR & 00. NEW OASH STORE, OPPOSITE BENSON HOUSE. LINDSAY. New Fall and Winter Jackets, New Dress Goods, New Underwear for Ladies and Children, New Corsets and Gloves, N cw Handkerchiefs, New Trimming Braids, New Frillings and Ties, New Flannels and Flannelettes, Barrister &c., Lindsay. Ne‘v TOWGIlingS, Cottons and Shirtings, Gentlemcn’s Furnishings Complete. We cordiallyinvite you to call and examine our new Fall Stock. One price to everybody. 33 KENT-ST., LINDSAY. Opposite the Benson House. KERR dz CO. SEASONABIE SPlIliih OOOOS. at. 30!. 19. 18%. MucutIaOne-muctaalm THE HATHAWAY PATENT FENCE WIRE. Most Attractive in Design, and will stand a Test Breakage or 2,500 lbs. SHGVELS, PicKS, FORKS, FULL STOCK BUILDING HARDWARE, PAINTS, OILS, AND WHITE LEAD, A FULL ASSDBTMENT 0F TlflWARE, ALL or WHICH WILL BE $01.1) AT ROCK BOTTOM PRICES FOR c.4311. BABY CARRIAGES $5.00 AND UP. To the Patrons: Land Rageâ€"r $ .00 and $7.00 Per Ton IN OAR LOTS- Jag. HEARD. ascggcam. HENRY PEARCE respectfully informs his numcro-rs old cus- tomers and the public generally that he has returned to Fenelon Falls and resumed The Boot and Shoe Business in the store lately occupied by Mr. S. Nevi son on the east side of Colhorne street,and hopes by turning out GOOD WORK AT LOW PRICES to obluin a fair share of patronage. W Drop in, leave your measure and be convinced that be can do as well for you as any boot or shoemaker in the county. All kinds of liEl’tk allfi‘ LIX ICCU'I‘ED with amines: and despatch. J. Neelands, Dentist. Beautiful sets of Artificial Teelh inserted for Sims}? and 5H. occluding to quality of teeth and kind of plate. Imitation gold filling.r burned in artificial teeth free of charge. Gus (ritulizrd air) and local antes. thctics used with great success for painless extraction. Visits the Ichrlhur House, Fenelon Falls, the third Tuesday of every -.__....a~__..._. . NO'FICE. To the residents of Fenelon Falls. Take notice that any person or persons removing from any village or district in- fected with diphtheria to Fenelon Falls will be quarantined for a period of 14 days or longer, a the discretion of the Board of Health. The citizens of Fenelon Falls who do not wish to be so inconvenienced will govern themselves accordingly. By order oi the Board of Health. A. WILSON, M. D., [Medical Health Oflicer Fenelon Falls, Feh'y 22nd, 1893. l-t. f. The “ Fenelon Falls Gazette” is printed every Friday at the office, on the corner of May and Francis streets. SUBSCRIPTION 81 A YEAR IN ADVANCE, or one cent per week will be added as long as itrcmains unpaid. Advertising- 13:11:08. Professional or business cards, 50 cents per line per annum. Camel advertisements, 8 cents per line for the first insrrtion, and 2 cents per line for evr-ry suhsrqucnt inser-i tiou. Contracts by the year, half year or less, upon reasonable terms. J OB PRINTING- Thcre is a cat out in Colorado which has probably viewed mom scenery in the Rocky Mountain region than any other member of the feline species. It was the Special pct. of the wife of the engineer of a freight locomotive, and it accompanies him on every trip he make-I When the train umch one of its long waits at the depot the cat will go in search of fun or mice, and at some of the most used junctions it is quite a local pet. When the engine is running, the cat sits in the cab or on the coal. and as its for is jet black. its beauty is not greatly impaired by its peculiar surâ€" roundings. I’ussy must have travelled many thousand miles. for it has been doing duty many years and has never been known to miss a trip. The tirat journey or two lhcre was much difiiculty about keeping the animal from jumping off, but there is none now, nor does the owuer bother hims‘eli'about ascertaining whether his feline passenger is aboard or not. The absolute indifiercuce of cats to persons and their attachment to places and environment is seen in this inâ€" fliction, for when last year the engineer got injured in a “rock and was laid up for three months. the cat stayed around the shops until the engine was repaired and then resumed her rides with the substitute eugineer.â€"-S(. Louis Globe. -.___.â€"_... Lost Book Notes. A few days ago the Brink of England presented a return to the House of Cour mons showing that there Wore notes of theirs to the amount of nearly £10000 that wore issued more than forty yo:er ago and had never been presented for payment. Bank notes, like other slips of paper, occasionally get destroyed by accident. Tile Bank ol England has always proudly dcclim-d to take advan- ~ tage of any accidents befalling their notes, provided they can be as.~urcd ol the good faith of those who appeal to them. Among, the curiosities of Threadâ€" needlc street they have, or they had, not a great while ago, in a little glazed , frame displayed on the wall. the charred remains ofa note that had been taken out of the fire of Chicago. As a note it had been completely burned, but the material of which Bank of Eng-laud notes are made is of such a character that it was still poSsiblo to establish the fact that it really had been a bond, and the numbtr and value were still discern iblc. It was therefore cashed. ~â€"¢-o-â€"- One of the Queerest Villages. One of the most curious settlements is at McAdam Junction, near the Eastâ€" ern Maine border. Half a dozon old, condemned freight ears have been re- trieved from their trucks and are snug- gled together in a bizarre village. Fam- ilies live therein, and children play about the doors. The squat little Shan- tytowu makes Waiting at that dreary junction even more dcpressing. Another feature of the landscape is the Canadian Pacific “ boncyard." Nearly a score of crippled, condemned and partially divâ€" mountcd locomotives stand about in the field, wholly unprotected from the. ch. ments. Perhaps they're not \vorth root'- ing, but it strikes a thrifty soul rathrr queerly to see what represents probably 8500.000 of outlay nearly buried in ice and snow and utterly neglectedâ€"Lewis» (on Journal. â€"-â€"-~â€"-o + o ‘ The Bullfrog’s Stolen Dinner. Here is the quot-rest bullfrog story on record: A youth who lives at High Shoals says that his father’s cowa fre- quently came up at night with the ap- pearance of having been milked. His father got tired of it and sent him to the pasture with the cows to catch the thief. He spent the day near enough to the cows to watch them, he thought, but at night it was still evident that the cows had been milked again. He was scolded and sent back with them the next day. About 11 o'clock, he says, a cow went into the canes and lowed. 'lIe crept through the brush and caught the thief in the act, and he proved to be a bulll'rog as large as a hat. The frog was hanging on to the cow's udder and seemed to be enjoying, his dinner im- mensely.â€"â€";S'avunnuh News. -~-‘~- -«~~ â€".-oâ€". â€" _.~__. How Cigar Ashes Can Be Utilized. Cigar ashes are used for medical pur- posesâ€"as a cure for ringworm, epidemic scarlatina, etc. They are useful on ac- ctiunt ot' the lime and alcoholic proper- ties they contain. Cigar ashes have been sold under the pretentious name of “diamond dust from the sun," and the purposes to which they are chi: fly put are cleaning plate. brightening and sharpening razors. income and doctors' other delicate instruments, as an insect- icide for plants, etc., and as a tooth . powder. i don firm offered a guinea per ounce for - them for the It has been stated that :1 Lou- purpose of commending of all ordinary kinds executed neatly, cor. with other articles as a Valuable denti- rectly and at moderate prices. } A Well Travelled Colorado Ooh", I .......â€".- W.â€" rnonlh. Call in the forenoon, if possible. lfrice: Odie: in Lindsay nearly opposite the Simp~ .on How. ' C The ash is. however, so light 12,9, rum), . - that it requires a very large quantity J’ropnuor. I indeed to weigh one ounce. an: .2322: airfares R E P A l R l N G is a pcm pinata." boss on suoarssr sore-s.