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_noosunono. Ber Exalted Station- I used to think it an easy hing, As easy as any one asksz _ To keep a family ncut am: prim, And manage the household tasks. It seemed to me in my foolish pride That the heft of'a woman's toil \‘l’as simply to sit by the door inside, And wait for the dinner to boil. While out in the summer's scorching hca. We men were sweating away, \Vith aching shoulders and jaded feet, From dawn to the close of day. But, sir. I would have you be assured That thoroughly, one by one, My notions of housework have all been cured And this is the way it was done. My wife suggested a day’s exchange, {L3 she dropped a kiss on my browâ€" _ “’l‘is hard." she said, "holding on to the reins, And riding the sulky plow. “You better stay in the house, my dear, And wash a few of the things, And churn and sweep where it needs it here And read till the dinner-bell rings. “The horses are gentle, and pretty true; I guess Ican drive them straight; I’ll try and turn a furrow or two, For the season is getting late." So off she rode on the sulky plough, \Ylbll hcrjaunty hat and blouse, \‘Vhilc I was inwardly vowing a vow How I would manage a house. But somehow, I found the morning chores Were not in my usual line. Like those I had finished out of doors .At least for a thousandth time. Against the stove my fingers I hit, And- blzstcred them stinging sore; In trying to scrub the clothes a bit I scrubbed my nucklcs the more. The churning acted ’spccially mean: The butter would almost come, And then go back to frothy cream, As if I bad Just bigun. The fire went out, as a fire will do Ithn the wood is not put in; And, as I thought of a meal for two, 1 did not know where to begin. But while I was fixmg potatoes and pork Notilt for a dog to eat, My wife returned from her forenoon‘s work As fresh as a rose. and as 5 Neck. ‘With a mortified air I quit the room, And bctook me to thcshed. IVhilc she got a dinner exactly at noom As good as ever was spread. We sat at the table opposite-wise, As always we did before, " W hen she asked with a smile in herswect blue eyes, If I would exchange some more? Then, sir, I confessed my faults and said} ' "My dear, you’re as good as a_quccn. i‘hc woman who keeps the family fed ls running a big“ machine." ‘ ' ‘. That Baby- It was 'a wee mite of a thing. in pink and white, delicate as a. newborn violet and buried within a. world of softest white stuff that rose up around its tiny face like billows ' of a frozen sea caught in a ground swell. It l was, to tell the truth, a funny looking little creatureâ€"this little baby, with its soft silky hair lying in fluffy patches over its pulsating head and its fat little check all excavated with pristine dimples that as yet were uh- I acquainted with the expanding properities g of a baby laugh. Its little eyes were round and wondering, and the liliputian mouth seemed made only to pucker up for a mourn- ful wail every time some mistaken old lady would try to spread a demonstrative kiss all over the little face. . Father and mother gazed upon this little newcomer into V their household with all that pride and joy that can come from no fount save that of the love born of instinct.- He would take the petite bundle of infin- itesimal baby and innumerable skirts up in 3 a gingerly, awkward sort of a way and look l I at it for a moment, and then he would lay it down gently upon the soft pillow again as if he feared it would break if it should by any chance he jostled against anything so tangible even as a strong current of air. Then, when all the rest had gone, the mother in whose eyes now dwelt that new light hitherto unknown within their depths, would gather up With a. confident grasp the little thing that was all in all to them both, and would insist upon calling the father’s attention, for the four hundredth and odd 1 time, to the many and fast multiplying beauties of the little creature and Would then be highly indignant if he did not re- peat twonty times in succession the admis- sion that he was confident that it was the most beautiful and wonderful baby the world had ever produced. She would catch the' infant up to her bosom and kiss its littlel face until it scarcely had a fair chance to breathe, and then she would lay it down again and, moving slightly away, feast- her eycs upon the litt‘e oue’s varied charms when shrouded in the iichlitencd enchant- 'ment borrowed from distance. 't was a common enough sort of a baby: after all, 'out then it was their baby, andl they thought there had never been a baby in l the world that could boast one-half the l charms that were embodied in the little piece l of humanity they called their own. There 5 might be many babies who could lip the beam of the grocer’s scales a pound or two more than theirs, and there might be thousmd parents who thought they hadi babicsmore beautiful than thisllittle fellow, : but this mother and father were not yet’ ready to admit the possibility of the up. proximate correctness, even, of such a line 3 of reasoning, This was their baby, their: only baby, and it was therefore the only‘ baby on earth for them and, besides, it was â€"thcir Valentine. 5 â€"â€" ’ i A Tale of Bricks! E Five clean. new, perfectly plain bricks lay on the floor, and the girl who had ' brought ~them in surveyed them with ap-l proval. . “I suppose,” said the scofi‘cr, “you are going to wind them with ribbons and put them on the parlor table.” ' “ Not exactly, but come around a week from to-day and see these bricks, and you’ll wish you had them. They are all to be useful, and some of them oranamental.” Seven days later the scofl'er was introduc- ed to a group of articles which she failed to recognize. . “ Brick No. 1,” said the showwoman proudly, “ is a paperweight. I never had a more satisfactory one.” The largest sur- faces of the brick were painted dark blue. one of them forming a background for a Spray of delicate white flowers. The sides were left the orginal color, and the whole was Covered with a coat of transparent varnish, through which the blue showed like tli; pli ‘ wr' fel wi f ri , sp bu- st: ho' on~ ors w h 1 her ple; in g. D nor ed ; prox prcc A ness hours ; never laughs ethic own jokes, or "oarseiiess, profanity or indelicacy fro. 1%; never intentionally wounds the feelings of another, or brings a. blush to the check of modesty. rin not Halk “ shop” or business outside of busi- Amcng the (looks- IIAn Toastâ€"One pint of milk, one full teaspoonde of flour, half cup of chopped ham, four slices of buttered toast. Boil the milk and thicken it wit-11 the flour. Add the ham, boil three minutes, take from the fire and add the beaten egg, stir well and pour over the toast on a hot platter. This is a nice dish, when there is only the rem- nant of a ltam in the house, or it is nice for an emergency dish, since it can be made from canned ham. Momsscs Omanâ€"One cup of butter or other shortening, two cups sugar, one cup molasses, one cup sour. milk, one teaspoon- ful ginger, one teaspoonful cloves, one tea- spoonful soda,~four and one half cups of flour, three eggs. Stir butter, sugar, inc- lasses and spices together, then add the soda. dissolve-.1 in the milk, then the flour, lastly the milk. This is very excellent molasses cake, but the quantities given make a very large cake, so that for a small family it will be necessary to divide the quantities. GIS(‘:I§BBI’. ..‘\D.-â€"Ollc cupful of scurcream, one cupful of molassos, pinch of salt, tea- spoonful soda, two teaspoonfuls of mixed spices (cinnamon, ginger and allspice), flour to make a. batter which will fall readily from the spoon. Luxcunox Canesâ€"Melt one pound of maple sugar and set in a warm place. Mold prepared bread-dough (raised yeast dough preferred) into smooth loaves. Cut off small portions, roll thin, and mark out into‘ long strips. Twist into fanciful shapes, fry in hot lard to a light brown, drain each cake, and dip into hot maple-sugar until well glazed. The cakes may be cut into rounds and their centers cut out with a small baking-powder can, if preferred. APPLE-SAUCJ". Dummixus.-â€"Pare and core eight large sour applesrstew soft in a syrup made of one cup of sugar, one cup of water, one teaspoonful of butter, and one fourth of grated nutmeg. Mix one quart of flour, two tcaspoonfuls of baking-powder, half a cup of butter, a little salt, and water enough to make a soft dough. Roll thin, out into diamonds or rounds, place them upon the surface of the boiling apple sauce, cover, and cook twenty minutes. Serve in sauce- plates. These conveniently and speedil ' manufactured dumplings are light and dc- lieious. ' - SPONGE C.\Kt:.-â€"lireak two eggs in a cup, with sour cream, turn out in your mixing dish, beat well, add one cupful of sugar, beat, sift half a teaspoonful ofvsoda and a pinch of salt in one and one-half cupfuls of flour, beat this in, and spice to taste. Sweet cream may be used in place of sour, only, in this case, remember to sift in with the llour one teaspoonful of cream of tartar. ARICiI Rotv-l’or.v.â€"-To one quart of water, two cups of granulated sugar add any flavoring preferred and let it boil until it forms a syrup. Make a dough of a pint of flour, pinch of salt, tnblespoonful lard. two teaspoonfuls baking powder. Mix with sweet milk or water. toll out thin and spread with cooked fruit of any kind ; roll up intoa roll, pinching the ends so as to retain the fruit. Lay the pudding carefully in the hot syrup, basting it with it and place it at once in a hot oven to bake. Basie l I l l I .A RAILROAD TO UGANDA- “Sod uciivc Prospects Before the "lish Invasionâ€"M‘tesa and M'wanga ~11! Kings. ‘ ; M’tesa of Uganda. was a very great )ut for all that no one in Europa mything about him pntil btanley dis- 1 him in 1875. Then missionarydom hocked and the Church Missionary ' sent out five missionaries, two of reached Uganda in 1877. M’tesa lthcm kindly, and for nearly two .1 went fairly well. In 1879, however, such priests sent out by Cardinal .‘ie, arrived in the country, and from ae there wastrouble. Heated argu- )ok place between the Roman :and Protestant missionaries, and lercation became so bitter that. exclaimed, “Has every nation of :ien, then, a different religion? I they were all brothers l” 2y were in theory. But that was nning of a great and very unbroiher- .al which has just ended in a. charac- ;lly British land grab. M’tesa wasa great king. Once when as at his court the King strolled no capital clad in e. frock coat and he wasn’t just like a European “ Yes,” said Emin, “you walk just 2 Emperor of Germany.” You see, 'as so far from Berlin that he could tried for “lesc majeste.” M’tesa died in 1884, and his son ga, a boy of 18, succeeded to the and soon began a series of persecu- t-he native Christians. His cruelty unbearable, and all parties combined ose him, and place his brother ‘1 ON THE THRONl-Z. just as bad and was in turn deposed Protestant and Roman Catholic par- 0 made common cause against him, y managed to reinstate M’wuuga. l 1889, the Mahommedan party, y liabarega, King of Unyoro, sent iguinst him and M’wanga appealed Imperial British Africa Company‘s aver such call on Britons go unan- .’ Capt. Lugard was dispatched as strator to Uganda, where he arrived mber, 1800. For eighteen months red to bring these rival fractions iething like order, and by listening brought comparative peace once on the country. wasn’t until after thousands of roots had been cut and a few White (1 it was only comparative peace, , for Kabarcga, King of Unyoro, clue, as obstinate an old central chump as ever slit 8. weazand. ‘ega, says Mountency J epthn in line, is amen who has done even ischicf than M’tesa. or M’wanga. vc king, I suppose, in Central Af- created more widespread ruin and ban be. He had managed to collect I from the Arabs who trade with me 5,000 guns of various descrip- om old muzzle-loaders t’o Snider's iingtons. With these be has armed ' t scouts whom he sends on raiding su'm cur-"HUS as mesa; - expcuunons into every country round. Al- The quality of courage possessed by the most wherever you go, north, south or west hunting-dogs appears in a marked (lifl'erence of Unyoyo, the \Varasura bandits are the of habit from that noticeable in all other scourge and terror of the country. Gordon, carnivorous beasts. As a rule, each fero- I who established stations in Unyoro as far as eious animal has its natural and favor- |M’ruli, made war upon Kabarega, and tried ite prey, which may vary in dill'crent locali- to capture him, but the Unyoro would only ties,but is in each case the ca. icst and most carry on c. guerilla warfare and always rc- PI‘Olll-able Victim Tigers, fOI'insmnce. are tired before Gordon’s advance, taking their cattle-Slayers or deer-killers, just as cattle king With them. There are numbers of ‘ or deer happen to be most abundant in their WOXDERFUL GAVES district Leopards prey on Goats slice ‘ b 1 k P, . 1 . a . and when they can get them, on tame dogs ; m, Elle FOLkS “nil‘lnollnthFIgGS m [gnyom wolves, on sheep and cattle ; steals, on rab- “ “Ch am cal)“- “0 0‘ fiOanndlg grail Hum" bers of people and cattle ; these are known bits and hares ; weasels, on rats and mice. 1 _1 ._ But though the jungles which thcv visit oflly t0 me People Of the _C<?l1l1t-11Y. W 10 7J! time of war use them aslndlngpiaces. Dn- abound in dcfenceless animals, the wild dog _ yore, therefore, being a very broken country, does not limit his attacks to these. The . . packs deliberate-1y pursue and destrov both would be difficult to subdue, out I have ' " frequent'y heard both Emui Pasha and Mac- ' the black and Himalayan bears and the . . . , tigers, affording, p6,.haps,‘the only instance bay say that. it 13 unperptivc for the peace in which one carnivorous species deliberate- 0f central Ame“ that kabarega‘ Should be ly sets itself to hunt down and destroy an- sul’l’ressed' other. From their rarity, the uninhabited nature of the jungles which they haunt, and their habit of hunting at nightâ€"which a probable suggestion makes the basis of the early legends of the demon hunter and the “ IIellcquin ” at a time when the “ red dogs” still remained in Europeâ€"observa- tions of their habits are rare. But the general belief of the wild tribes of India is borne out by two stories told by Col. Baldwin of their attacking the bcurand the tiger, which put the fact beyond doubt. A bear was found by an English cflicer standing at bay before the dogs. He had killed one ; but his hide and body were torn in strips by the bites of the pack. In the other case, the fresh bones of the tiger were found, from which theIllesh was eaten ; one paw still remained whole, and close by_ lay the freshlyzkilled bodies of three wild dogs, which had fallen in the fight. Remember- ing not only the strength and activity of the tiger, but the astonishing pluck with which, even when wounded, it will con- stantly charge a. line of elephants, and en- deavor to scale the howduhâ€"which is, in fact, a fort with an armed garrisonâ€"it is difficult to overestimate the courage of the wild dogs in meeting and destroying such an antagonist. W'c think it extremely prob- able that future observations of the cour- age of the wild dog may justify a statement once made, perhaps without sufficient evi~ dencc, that they have “ an inherent hostil- ity to the larger l'elincc,and are incessantly on the watch to destroy their whelps, so wan. VJ Heard in the Chen Loft. The congregation raised its eyes to the organ left. There was a grand burst of melody from the great pipesand the chorr song. The alto began. Directing her glance toward the gremed roof, she sounded, aloud the notes of praise. “As, the hart pantsâ€"the hart paâ€" â€" ants â€"'-" It was a joyful noise, and the congrega- tion listened spellbound. “ For the warâ€"atch of the still pooâ€"oâ€" 001.” The alto was regarding the soprano earn- estly. “ l’ooâ€"ooâ€"l.” “I wish you’d see if my dress hangs straight, Liz.” . . _ The organ was carrying the inspiring strain along. “ Poo -â€"â€"oâ€"o-â€"lâ€"” The tenor, with eyes devoutly on space, made audible acclaim: . “ So thirsteth my soul for Thee." The organist was employing both hands and feet to fill the holy edifice with music, and his efforts were conspicuously success- ful. “ ilill”-â€"-“my soul for Thee.” The instrument took another turn. --“ Got any chewing with you ‘1”â€"“ for Thee. O Lord.” The basso shook his head slightly. The congregation attributed the motion to a deep earnestness. “ As the lia-a-artâ€"â€"’ The liquid harmony fairly floated from the throat of the soprano. The organ came to her relief for a. moment at inter- vals.” “ Your dress is straight, Jenâ€"- pit-â€" a-l-ants for the still” ~â€"“hew’u mine ”â€" “ pooâ€"oâ€"o â€"-ol, so tliirsteth my soul ”â€" “ plague take suspenders,”â€"~"nfor Thee, O Lord.” “ Aâ€"aâ€"amcn.” The congregation moved with a big sigh. The service pro- fastened ) that the species the the instrument by which future keeps down the superabundant increase of the great feline) of the wider- ness. I, H Tim '3 Full Name. A negro, familiarly known as “ Tim” \Vhitc, on one occasion found it necessary to record his full namcu'l‘he not unnatural supposition that “ Tim ” stood for Timothy was met with a flat denial. “No, sah ! My right name is, \Vhat- rThe Spell Was bl‘Oken- timorous-souls-Wc-poor-mortals-be White. CGBded- * Dey jce’ calls me Tim fo’sho't, sah l”â€" A Hoosiers Class-~ Frankâ€"Do you know how I can cure May of loving me? Belle â€"No. If she loves you her case is plainly hopeless. A Surprising Procedure. .Tommy Cribbage (at ‘_thc Sunday dinner table)â€"“ Mrs. Tillinghast had her knitting at church this morning.” Mrs. Cubbage (shocked)â€"“ \Vhat on earth was she knitting in church l” Tommyâ€"“ Her brows. ” .._._..- Hard Hit. Sheâ€"Maude? 0h, she’s one of the friends of my youth. lleâ€"I didn’t take her to be as old as that. , She said he was her idol ere The ceremonies bridal, And now since he won’t work a bit, She calls him still her “idle.” -~.~~.. .«.. . v... -._,. x... . »» a...“ - v,. -- THE PIG. Nonsense About a smm and Pycspcctame Member of Animal Society. The pig is a. fitting, evanescent qufi puped that runs through the Circuit of fr 9 life in, a few brief iiibons. Before he is hardly aware of it he has become a. distended, 'fulh blown hog, hedged in by many limitations and beset by many difficulties. He steps with alacrity while ho‘is young and tender, and always takes the cake when he is on his mettle. He is the cynosurc of all eyes for the languid droop of his eyelids and for bid peachy pink and white complexion. Even in dcwy youth he is possessed of a veice of remarkable timbre, and can render an aria in the key of A, three sliai'pLorfour flats without an effort, and is en adopt on the tremolo and demi-semi-quavcrs. His capacity for close, compact storage. is unparalleled. He will swallow a brim- mng pail of milk, and then you can chuck him into the pail lengthwise and he won’t fill it more than half full. He can flatten himself out and crew under a gate when a weasel would scoot around to the gap. ,r In the fo're endof his career he is a glow- ing, throbbing creature, almost quaint and altogether antic. . '. Nature gave him the gilt of grace in his» tail, but made such a botch in the inside of his head theta fellow man is sometimes. dubbed pighearled ; however, this is often more than the average pig can stand. . Time wings him along with a swrft swipe until he finds himself suddenly transmitted into a blase hog with but one..impulse, anfi that is to get all he can and keep all he can get. . . A hog,r is a hog: and you lose time in trying to dilate on him, for he wants to do all the dilating himself. Many years ago some brilliant mind formu- lated an astrocious libel and flung into the faces of the herd this tauntâ€"“Root, hog, or die.” Now if he had only said : Swine inspire. Otherwise expire. there would have been both rhyme and rea- son iu it, for it would have stood the test 0: science and it would have got its 'feet into the trough of poetry, where they approx- mately belong. Besides it would relieve the hog of the necessity of exertion and it might have bumped along the corridors of time, sending out sparks of truth and bar- many. A hog likes to lie down and do nothing industriously for hours at a time. I might say for hours on the stretch, only my phras- ing would imply too much tension. You can better understand why I don't stick closer to my subject when you consider how soon the pig flickers out and is as though he never was. I When a hog leaves ofl" being a. pig he wan‘s to go Somewhere as of yore, but al- most always he finds himself too big to squeeze in, so he lies down in the mud until supper time, unless he is coerced. I recall vividly an instance of coercion when a town boy visited a country boy and they drove the hog into the orchard and took turns riding;r him all through the long sultry hours of a July afternoon. \Vhen their exercise was finished the hog was also finished. They performed a. lay in concert, thoth it was somewhat differentin character. When the hog lay down in the mire it was a soft lay, and a long lay, but when the irate farmer lay on it was a hard lay and the ' blisters stayed by for some time. When the hog reaches his ultimate, and is securely cornered, he has been known to make as many as two braces of billionaires ' in a. day. Truss THAT TRY THE cowsdr’s NERVE. Stormy Night’s, “'heu His 1.01 Is Hardly a Happy One. In the windy, bleak nights when the rain falls in torrents or the snow, flying in clouds seems to cut asunder all that comes before it», that cowboy has the greatest ob- stacles to overcome. These are the nights when a sudden stampede might destroy all the rounding-up work of weeks preceding. Mounted on his best bronco the cowboy rides out to his post, on the outskirts of the gathered herd, miles away, perhaps, from' the camp. As' the wind whistles in hoarse cadence along the surface of the ground and through the sagebrush, his dull chant floats over to the uneasy herd. A few steers made restless by the cold start to wander away from the gathering place, and through the blackness of the night the cowboy sees their moving forms. \Vithout coming the song he moves gently past them and they are turned back to the thousands they have at- tempted to leave. Once in a. while a steer escapes, to return again at break of day, but the general stampede seldom happens. lut when n stampede does occur the cowboy’e nerve is tried to the utmost. “Milling” astampede is one of the most dangerous operations that a. cowboy has to endure. To mill the cattle is get them going in a. circle and letting them run them- selves down. A frightened herd of several thousand will run over a. train or anythin ;. The only way to stop them is for Some bold follow to mount a horse and ride around thé herd, and by constant cuts of the lsriat‘ or squirt get the leaders turned. .He must follow close after the leaders and not mind these in the rear; They will follow. But it is certain death if he is unhorsed or his pony stumbles. The frightened herd would trample him to death in a moment. A cowboy once told me that he was trying to mill :1. stampede one very dark night. He was almost at the. leaders when his horse stopped. He had raised his spurs to plunge them into his pony’s flanks when a flash of lightning showed him that he was on the verge of o. precipice some 200 feet high. He said he went back to camp sick, and it was a week before he could take to the Saddle. Diogenes. a Tragedy in Two Act:- ACT I. Aristarchus (seeing Diogenes nosing arOund with a 1ight)â€"â€"â€"Ah, there, old hey, what are you doing with that lantern 2 - Diogenes (ctoically)â€"Looking for an hon- est man. AGE 11.. Timeâ€"Four hours later. Aristarchus (meeting Diogenes without the lightlâ€"Halloo l~havc you found your honest man? ' Diogenes (wrathfully)â€"â€"No, I’m looking for the son of a gun that stole my lantern. If a man did not glory in his own wickcd' ness he would accuse the devil of being a woman.