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W".fi “v.2 th‘ Young King Benjamin. George Wright, who arrived in San Francisco on the steamer Australia a day or two ago from the Caroline Islands, tells the story of the sudden rise of a sailor to distinction in one of the largest islands of an archipelago. seventy-five miles west of Haweis, where Mr. Wright has a trading store. {3“ The sailor, Bap]? :"amin, and oddgwives and rep.” ”He was Bomhézine ofl ren. ”He was wrecked in the schooner Bombé-zine off the Ladrone Islands nine years 'ago, and floated at sea on a raft a couple of weeks before he struck land; ...:11 ‘33 you will look at a map you will find lying midWay between the Tropic of Cancer and the equator thirteen dots. On some maps they appear marked. ‘Thirteen islands, well inhabited’. Well it is on the biggest one of these, called Benjamin Island, in honor of himself, that he has taken up his home. It seems odd that an island asbig as this has not been got down finer by the geographers, but it remains practically a term incognita, although it is ten by Wenty odd miles in extent. ~-“ ‘Well inhabited’ means that there is quite a sprinkling of dark-skinned native residents there, as well as many men who move to and iro in their light native boats. They eat bread fruit, bananas, cocoanuts and fish, and that’s the end of it. They don’t work at all. “Benjamin has got to be a king in his far-away home. There the white- capped waves beat against. the coral shores, and Benjamin has got nothing at all to do but to go swimming in the 1.,“The sailor,” said Mr. Wright, “is Carl femamin, and he has no less than twenty di’fiives and fifty cappor-colored child; vuâ€" vv-â€"‘v “He is about 30 years old and came from Newburyport, Mass, but says that he no longer has any desire to return to this country. and that he is perfectly con- tented to end his days there. He is the only Whlte man, with one exception, for hundreds of miles around. anua--â€" v -__ - “He has taken to wearing a string of shells around his neck like the natives, and he sometimes imitates their example and puts dots of blue paint, got from a native shrub, on his face. This is only on State occasions, however, when there is a discussion of important question on hand with his subordinates. “The permanent population of the is- land is perhaps not over 600 or 700 It is a very pretty and picturesque place, and the soil is very rich. It is indented with beautiful hays, whose shores are dotted with trees and shrubs of a tropical growth that are oftentimes covered with fragrant flowers. The island is about 600 miles west of the Marshall group.”â€"San Fran- cisco Examiner. eets, which took up a position on a. shed beneath his window. Some friend told him that they could be frightened away‘ by exploding a torpedo among them. He resolved to try it. He said nothing to his wife, but procured the largest torpedo he could find, and hid it in a convenient place in his sleeping-room For several nights his slumbers were un- disturbed. Then one nizht, toward mid- night, he was awakened by the usual doleful yells. '/ '- His Torpedo, A gentleman living in Boston was much annoyed by the nightly serenades of some “ I’ll fix em I” he said to himself, as he crept from his bed and seizedthe torpedo. He stole up to the window 'and glanced out ; the cats were plainly visible in the moonlight. He took careful aim, and threw the torpedo with all his strength. He was determined to make a sensation ! ‘l L16 "as uvvv-.â€".---_ - There was a report like a dozen pistol shots in the room ! He had mistaken the large pane of glass for an open Window, and the torpedohad exploded thereon. s‘f‘l.‘ His Wife spmng up, screaming, " Uh oh I What? Where are you. Henry 'l” Shrieks and cries of “ What’s the mat- ter ‘?” “Murder!” “Robbers are in the house 1” “ VVe’ll all be murdered ” and the like resounded through the halls, as the frightened lodgers sought to dis- cover what could have hapRened. UU'UL " Lay-v yum.â€" __-- . V The door-bell rang vidlently, and a policeman appeared, greatly excited, thinking that: a. mugder had been com- 111157 whence the repgrt had come. " IIULLVU III-v .â€" 'r -_ V “ Let me in 2” he called. “ Let me in, or I’ll burst open the door !” The unfortunate author of all this com- motion explained matters. as best he could. Quiet was soon restored in the house, but the cats on the shed, undisturbed by the uproar. continued their serenade. i~~~ L:_ Lanny-u u Av;--, v--_-____~_, The hero of our tale bears his honors meekly. He never mentions the subject of his own accord, and is free to say that he prefers cats to torpedoes. Dr. Von BuldW is a very nervous man, as every one knows and as most artists 777777777 h. u.-.- are. At a recent performance it was noticed that he left the”stage"in the middle of a piece, and returned with a stalwart mechanic, who moved the piano some distance to the left, and that he then sat down and finished the perform- ance. It has been learned since what the difficulty was. The day was warm, and the theatre warm, and a lady who sat directly in the range of his vision was fanning herself vigorouslyâ€"against time! He said that if she had only kept time with the music he could have stood it, but her false best nearly drove him The following story comes from Dubu- que, Iowa, and if true, is certainly one of the strangest on record. A man named George Lucas attempted suicide a year'ago by shooting himself through the forehead. The ball penetrated his brain six inches, but could not be found by the surgeon who probed for it. He gradually recover- ed, but he had completely lost his memory and was subject to frequent fits. The wound suppurated and at intervals pieces of bone were extracted. Several days ago the wound was opened and the sur- geon located the bullet, which was to-day extracted. By this afternoon the patient had marvellously improved and exhibited to his friends the bullet which he had carried in his brain for a year. Lucas was offered $5000 to exhibit himself at the Paris exposition while the bullet was in his brain, but refused. frantic. The Colored New Jerusalem.â€"-I found a lot of colored people at Raleigh ready to go to Louisiana in charge of an agent, and : selecting an intelligent-looking man I call- ed him aside and asked him to explain how and why the exodus started. “Well sah,” be readily replied, . “it started in dis way. Julius Strakerâ€"dat fat man you see in de depot doahâ€"cum up to our nayburhoad an’ axed us if we didn’t want to be rich. He said we’d go to Louisiana. we’d git way up high in no time. Dat’s why we ar’ gwine” “But how’ll you get rich?” “Work de cotton crap on sheers. We get half. De fust year we shall dun make $1000. Arter dat we shall git along faster. Ize figgered dat I shall have $10,â€" 000 in five years.” “And what will I do then?” “Open a bank, sah.” “Are. all of you going to accumulate $10,000 and open a bank? No, sah. Dar’s one pusson who is going to accumulate $7,000 an’ den buy a steamboat, an’ another who is gwine to cumulate $5000 an’ buy hisself a toll- bridge, an’ sot down in a cheer all de rest { of his lif.” U.“ “A; ibted.5 uu-wv “ ...._ “v ,, He rushed up to the room A rather curious episode in natural his- tory occurred on board the French steam- boat.“Abd-el-Kader” during the passage from Marseilles to Algiers. Just as the vessel was about two hours out the sky became quite black with swallows. It was then about six o’clock in the evening. The birds alighted in thousands on the sails ropes and yards of the “Ahd-el-Kader,” After a perky survey of the deck from , their eminences aloft they descended coolly ; on deck, hopped about among the sailors‘ and eventually found their way into the cabins, both fore and aft. The birds were evidently fatigued after a long flight. and allowed themselves to be caught by the ‘ people of the ship. who gave them a wel- come reception, and provided them with food which they enjoyed heartily. The little Winged strangers remained all night on the vessel, and in the morning at seven o’clock the whole flock made for land. One rarely hears the name of the great] leader of the Irish party in Great Britain. 9 Mr. Parnell, pronounced correctly; it seems much easier tolpronounce it in the usual American way, with an emphatic accent on the last syllable, and Without any regard to the peculiar demands or methods of English as it is pronounced by ' Englishmen. The correct pronounciation, however, places the accent on the first syllable, as if the word were written ‘ ‘Parnul. ” A man by the name of Klinkingbeard says he was once hunting in the Virginia mountains. He got lost, travelled around all day until, tired out, he sat down on a. log to rest. After sitting there awhile he thought the log moved and jumped up and examined. He found to his unspeak- able amazement that it was a large snake. He ran off about fifty yards' and fired at i it, but the ball glanced off without hurt- ing the snake: The monstrous reptile raised its head up about fifty feet, but Mr. Klinkingbeard soon had another charge in his gun, and this time he aimed at the smooth place around» the neck .where there seemed to be no scales. This made the snake awfully sick and it‘ spewed up n. canoe and nine Indians. This is a true story. POT-POURRI. THE WATCHi‘ A man without character is always mak- ing a fuss about having it vindicated. Do‘not envy the driver of an ice wag- gon his cool place in summer. In four months last season 42 drivers in New York city were attacked with rheumatism. Jingsâ€"“Kind of a. peculiar Spring so far, isn’t it?” J angsâ€"-How’s that?” J ings â€"-“No water in it.” N. B.â€"-This joke was compounded for dry weather. The drama. is getting more and more realistic. Real babies, real. water, real burglars are among the advertlsed realities. We have hopes of a future play with real actors. 41-13 .. . Louiseâ€"“Does your father ..~apprOVe of your engagement?” Lilyâ€"“Oh, yes; ' papa. thinks George is real smart. In fact he pinched papa in a wheat deal last week. Georgeâ€"“Won’t you be mine, dear 2 ” Clara â€"â€"“I think I should have to be hard ressed indeed to take you.” George fequal to the emergency)â€"“Oh, if that’s all. here goes.” Mr. Bloomingdale Ward (tremulously after venturing a kiss)â€"â€"“Iâ€"â€"I-â€"I beg pardon. I didn’t mean to. 1â€"” Miss Dolly Flicker (severely)â€"“If you had been sincere I might have forgiven you.” , A Summer Romanceâ€"Smiley Basker‘ ‘â€"“Ah! here comes Miss Coupon. the heiress. I waited on her once.” Friend (incredulously)â€"“You ! Where?” Smiley ‘Baskerâ€"“At the White Mountain house.” , In, glancing retrospectively at his career bothasasurgeon and apoet, Dr. Oliver Wendell Holmes said he could not tell whether he had taken more pleasure in‘ removing limbs than in constructing feet. A Fiercer Beast. Poor Old Coldeckâ€" “Can you let me have a little money, sir, to keep the wolf from the door?” Wise Old Upriteâ€"“If appearance don’t belie you, my man, it is net the wolf, but the tiger you need to shun.” Small Clerkâ€"“Och, fadder, dat gun vat- you sole Meester Schmallwitz last veek bursted de virst dime he vire it OK, and killed him det.” Proprietorâ€"“Mine gracious! dot was awvul ! I zold him dot goon on drust. ’ I! I ' r ___A 1..-... LL- “1‘ , vvâ€" __ -_. a - _, ,, Mr. Highlive (looking up from the pa- per)â€"â€"“Well, well! Wonders will never cease ! They’ve got so now that they can photograph in colors.” Mrs. Highlive (glancing at his nose)-â€"-“I think, my dear, you’d better get: your picture taken before the old process is abandoned.” Mrs. Tinweddifigâ€"“Oh, George, I had; such a disagreeable dream last night I I ‘ dreamed that I asked you for $25 to buy an Easter bonnet, and you refused. But dreams always turn out contrary you know.” Mr. Tinweddingâ€"â€"-“Ahem 3â€"yes -â€"so do husbands sometimes.” Little Tom sufi'ered with the toothache and had worn himself out of crying. His grandpa tuld him to be a man and not cry any more. The little fellow looked tearfully towards his aunt for sympathy and said: “Grandpa finks this is a. slow, soft toosache, but its a. tonfounded Buf’lo lightening nexpress toosache.” Poor Tom gotlots of pity after his remarkable definition of toothache. “You say your daughter has been study- ing French for ten years; but has she made any advance in her studies?” "Oh, yes, indeed; very great advances. She has become so proficient that she always speaks English with a. French accent, and liter FrenEh is remarkable for its pure English inflection.” Mrs. Younglove.â€"My dear, What do you think of my spring bonnet? Isn’t it a perfect dream, and only cost $40, too? Mr. Youngloveâ€"It is very pretty, sweet- ness, but hereafter you must take some- thing that Will make yep sleep like a. top. -_- A ‘u p MrsjaYsâ€"Why? Mr. Y. â€"-Because your dreams come too high for my pocket. Mrs. Ripperâ€"“7e11, John, I’m glad to see you back. What a. dreadful time you must have hadâ€"sleeping out doors, going hungry, being chased by Indians. shot at: by cowboys andâ€"” Mr. Ripper (looking among a chaos of bedding, beds, chairs and tables for his boots)â€"Well Jane, Oklahoma was pretty tough. but I’m sorry I didn’t stay there till you were done cleaning house. ' Sarcasm isa dangerous weapon, but like other dangerous weapons, it is very useful on occasion. A Main street car was lag- ging along at the rate of a mile an hour, and the conductor was sparring with him- self to keep from freezing. At the same time he persistently left the door open, to the great annoyance of the shivering pas- sengers. Finally a pretty young lady beckoned to him, and he hastened to her side. “Will you please lower this win- dow?" said she, in a. matterâ€"of-fact tone, “and then bring me a glass of ice water?” The conductor hastened out and slammed ‘ the door behind him. and the passengers showed by their smiles how well taken they thought her point of order was. ' Accepting the Situationâ€"“No, Mr. Jackson, I cannot be your wife. as my heart is already in the keeping of another but I can be a sister to you.” “Oh ! ’tis hard to thus be obliged to give you up, Maud, and still your very generous offer to be as a sister to me cannot go unaccept- ed. Will you be as near a real sister to me as possible?” “Yes, George, I shall 1 endeavor to.” “There is Jack Fourin-l thand’s sister, for instance. Will you be as loving and attentive to me as she is to him?” “With all my heart, George.” “Very well, then, sister mine, I shall try to be worthyâ€"ah, I really must be going thoughâ€"good night, Sister.” The next day Miss Maud received a package, and, upon opening it, discovered that it con- tainedâ€"horrorsâ€"two pairs of pants, six pairs of socks and shirt. A note slipped out, and upon reading it this is what she saw: Dear sister Maud,â€"I ascertained from Jack Fourinhand that his sister was in the habit of doing all his mending. Thinkingof our agreement, I bethought me of these few articles of wearing apparel, which are sadly in need of buttons and mending._ _I_hsve iong needed_ a sister that would look after my clothes, and since you have so kindly consented to act in that capacity you may commence your dunes ”at once. Your loving brother, George. MAN. LINDSAY, THURDSAY, MAY 9, 1889. ASSETS, - - - $32, 620, 676 SURPLUS, (by Canadian Standard) 7, am, 000 NGOME, - - - - 5,000,000 DEPOSIT AT OTTAWA, - 2,098,223 .The government blue books of the past five years (pages 58, 68, 72, and 86) shew the cash paid to living policy holders in Canada, in settlement of Endowment Bonds during the five years ending J anu- ary 1st, 1888, as follows :â€" AETNA LIFE, - - - $446,998 CANADIAN AND BRITISH 00M- PANEIS COMBINED, - I35,666 Besides the $446,998, the [Etna Life paid to living members in Canada $447.57 7 in annual cash dividends upon their poli- cies, and $729,434 to Widows and orphans of deceased members, making a total of $1,624,000 during the past five years in Canada. Lindsay. Ont, RISTERS, Solicitors, etc. Office William-Sn, ADAM HUDSPETH, Q. C, ALEX. JACKSON G H. HOPKINS, (successor to Martin Hopkins) Barrister, Solicitor etc. Oflice, Thirkell’s Block, Kent St. Lindsay, Ontario. F . TORNEY, Solicitor and Notary Public MONEY TO LOAN. Ofice. Kent-5L, Lindsay. 1” RISTERS, SOLICITORS. etc. Hamiltona, Block, Kent street, Lindsay. JOHN McSWEYN. DONALD R. ANDERSON. “l 1' ' CITOR, Proctor, Notory Public, Conveyancer, Etc. Offices in Bigelow's Block, Corner York 8; Kent Streets. Entrance on York Street, Lindsay, Ont. HUDSPETH JACKSON, BAR- RISTERS. Solicitors, etc. Office William-ASE, LVL RISTERS, Solicitors, Notaries, etc., etc. Offices over Ontario Bank, Kent-Sn, Lindsay. D. I. McINTYRE. T. STEWART 11' LICITOR, etc.; County Crown Attorney, Clem-k of Peace, Lindsay, Ont. Office over Howe’s tore, Kent-8L, Lindsay. U TERS Attorneys at Law, Solicitbrs in Chancery c c. Office. Dohney Block, Kent street. ’7 ARTHUR O'LEARY. HUGH O'LEARY. O’LEARY O’LEARY, BARRIS TERS Attoncvs at Law. Soiicitors in Chancery Barristers, Solicitors, c. Office, Kent St., Bakers Block, upstairs. MONEY TO LOAN at lowest G current rates. JOHN A. BARRON. JOHN CAMPBELL. R. J. McLAUGHLIN. U SURGEON, ETC., Lindsay. v ' 8: S. Kg. Office and résidence Cambridge- St. Lindsay, opposite Baptist Church, U SURGEON. Etc. oa site Carr's Hotel, William-Sn, ROWS, M. D. C. M., Gradua Lindsav. Ontario. MATURE!) ENDOWMENTS. U PHYSICIANS and SURGEONS. omce and residence Russell street, one door west of York st. Ofiicehoursg.ooa. m. toxo..20a.m x 3op..m to3p p..m and7 t08p.m. C. L. COULTER, M. D., Med1cal Health Officer. Surgeon Grand Trunk Railway, Lind- say pistrigt. W. H. CLARKE. M. D. Lindsay, an. Afiril 22nd, 1889.-â€"I3. DRS. COULTER CLARKE, PHYSICIANS and SURGEONS. Office and W. F. MCCARTY THE WATGHMAKER, FAUGH A BALLAH! has on hand a nice, neat. stock of W'atches, Clocks and Jewel- ery at lowest prices for honest goods. The Old Reliable Seth Thomas Alarm Clock, only $2,5o. IN CLOCKS Seth Thomas, New Haven and Ingraham. Life Assurance Company. REPAIRING A SPECIALTY. Satisfaction guaranteed on all work entrusted to my care or money refunded. IN W .A. 'I‘ C H E S Naltham, Elgin, Hampden, Illi- nois and Swiss Movements. vfl'a Ahv $4703- I. CSWEYN ANDERSON, BAR- cINTYRE STEWART, BAR- JOHN D. MAGMURGHY, BARRON. CAMPBELL MCLAUGH LIN, Q’rofessiortat @arbs. B. Dean, BARRISTER, SOLI- DEGRASSI, PHYSECIAAN, . MOORE. BARRISTER, AT- DEVLIN, BARRISTER,SO- BURROWS, PHYSICIAN HERRIMAN, M. D. M. _CA._P. ybtysicicms. Daly house. Etc. Office and residence oppo’ imam-Sn, P. PALMER BUR- .,Graduate McGill College 1866 Wfim W. F. McGARTY. G eneral Agent ETC, Wellington-5L, Doors, Sash, Nails, Paints, and Oils. LEADERSIN HARDWARE Pressed Hay, ' Drain Tile, Cement, Best Quality at Wholesale Prices. A R PET 8’ Are nvw offering a large lot of CRflSSLEY’S’ SOUTHWELL’S and other first-class maker’s BEST FIVEâ€" FARME BRUS- SELS with borders in lengths to cover Bedrooms, c., of from 10 to 25 yards at 8 5c. per yard made. City prices for these Goo is is $1.30 per yard, and all are guaranteed to be the be st five frame. Orders by mail giving size and style of Carpet required will be promptly attended to. A special ne of GROSSLEY’S and other makeS- BEST TAPESTHY 650. Per Yard- WHOLESALE AND RETAIL. 3, KING STREET EAST. TORONTO. Canadian Live Stock 8:. Farm J ournal “WATCHMAN” 15-03. $1.10, Dr The WATC H MAN for 50 cents per year With each Farm Journal there is a beautiful lithographic Engraving of the Ontario Agricultural College and Experiâ€" mental Farm, Guelph. Garden Tools. WM. i'eEATTY SON. WM. BEATTY 82: SON, WILLIAM STE WA TCHMAN LIBERAL OFFERS. WE WILL GIVE THE ’Vzflz‘z'fig Ofice, R; D. THEXTDN. J OS. COOPER, E'I‘, LINDSAY ”p :ctgo O LLn‘P ‘il‘ a‘ :‘mofnse Silver-Ph not Wearing this for the first tim€ the day “'94 M the brid' m to which hemmzide by “ I knowe‘ duds to tea: with Mandy @3093}? When SUP? Illnd the c inhostqsse auto eatin L It-comin' . h I don Y [nigh the u 'ddmg in d m women. was aroum flnfirst grce tome front : lonnceo. . mop)” Ci to order. ‘ dy L9“ e11 M £1 01 lpknd mt w finch she. Manda 1: ”bed hié I hyar, that “You mus‘ 18ft hands ye don‘t w fi‘Tom hke this ’7 3.“'3 up.