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r TT Tle ia le 2 ES on OL XV, NO. 11.{ Ser PRINCE ALBERT, ON T., THURSDAY, MARCH 7, 1872. {WHOLE NO. 738 &pe Butarin Boserher, A WEEKLY * POLITICAL, AGRICULTURAL AND Family Newspaper; ¥8 PUBLISHED AT TUE VACTFORIA BLOCK, PRINCE ALBERT COUNTY OF ONTARIO, {ino i BY 2 Ll K { BAIRD & PARSONS. TERMAS :--$1.50 mbntiis;iCno pS that tin eription taken (or lessthan six mo ol o€ tntiuned until apd arreursare paid. festterscantaining money, when addressed to Rigafice, pre-paid andregistered, willbeateurrisk, . "RATES OF ADVERTISING. 'or cach line, first insertion............ bsequent insertions, per line......... Oards, under 6 lines, per annum...... 5 00 vertisements measured in Nonpareil and charge aetording to the spai y occupy. Advertisements received for publication. without spesifi instructions, will beingerted until forbid. an chyrgedaccor y. Noadvertisemeni willbetaken but witil paid for. liberal discountallowedto Merchants and others advertiseby the year orhall-your. . Phesetcrms willinalleuses. be sirictiyal. perannum, if paid withinsix 3 / oN ng importance of theNorth epublicationofliheOssErver illbe unsuipassedby ada. -- J « . JOB DEPARTMENT. Phamphlets, Hand Bills. Posters, Programmes, Bill , Meads, Blank Forms, Receipt Books, Checks, id ocks, Circulars, Business Cards. Bull Card of v 2 any other st abtishment in this County ! Partiesfsom a Iistance gattinghandbills,&e. printed an em done toluke home withthem, 3. BAIRD. | H, PARSONS, Ei -------------------------- 'WProfessional Cars. Dr. Brathwaite, 1 "PRINCE ALBERT, Physician, Surg and Acc DR. WARE, Chinn for the County of Ontario, P Physician, Surgeon and Accoucheur, nce Albert C. E. MARTIN, M. D,, : PORT PERRY. R. JONE, M.D. CORONER FOR THE COUNTY OF ONTARIO; 1. PHYSICIAN, SURGEON, &C. \FFICE sud Residence over Allison J & Petut's Drug Store, Port Perry, Drs. McGILL & RAE, Prrsicias Surgeons, &c., &e. Office and Residences, King street, Oshawa. WR. N'GILL, NM. D. FRANCIS RAE. M. B. SAMUEL H, COCHRANE, LL.D.. PARRISTER, County Crown Attorney, Solicitor in Chancey, Notary Public, &c., Brock street, Whitby. 2 RB. J, WILSON, ARRISTER, Attorney at Law, Solicitor in Chanery, &c. Office in the Victoria ding, Brock-st., Whitby. LYMAN ENGLISH, L. L. B,, OLICITOR in Chancery, Allorney, Conyeyancer, &c., Oshawa. Ofice--Simcoc street, opposite the post office. DENTISTRY. Rh ER H. L. Harnden,L.D.S., Surgical and Mechanical Dentist, Of Eleven Years Experience, OFFICE, =» » QUEEN STREET, PORT PERRY. RESIDENCE--PRINCE ALBERT. Particular attention given to the regulati of Chlidrens Teeth, it her Mineral Teeth mounted on Gold, Silver aud Vulcanized Rubber, » Teeth filled with Gold so as to preserve them from further decay. Nitrous Oxide Gass administered for the Painless extraction of Teeth. Consultation free and all work warsnted. Oct. 4,1871. ~ snourance, THE ONTARIO FARMERS' Mutual Insurance Company rms Company is now fully organized and is prepared to accept risks on Farm Buildings and their contents, country School Houses-and Churches. Those wishing to insure and thereby support.a Home Insurance Company have now an opportunity of doing so either by applying to the Head Office, or to any of the local Agents of the Company. Our rates will be found as low as those of any responsibleMutual Insurance Company in Canada. Head Office<The old Registry Office Build- ings Brock Street, Whitby. L. FAIRBANKS, Jr., 27-1y Secretary WESTERN ASSURANCE COMP'Y TORONTO, C. 'W. INCORPORATED ............1851. Capital -' - $400,000 President HON. JOHN McMURRICH Vice-Presiden ... C. MAGRA'T i Secretary... LE, GENERAL AGENT. © Auctioneers, rs A rt rt aan, Major & Willcox, LICENSED FOR THE COUNTY OF ONTARIO, Valuators, Land Agents, Commission Merchants, &c. ACCOUNTS COLLECTED PROMPTLY. Money to Loan at 8 per cent. E. MAJOR, W. M. WILLCOX, BoRELIA. PRINCE ALBERT. Sept. 28, 1870. 39 Wm. Gordon, Licensed Auctioneer, Valuator, &e., &c.. ) the Townships of Brock, Uxbridge, Scott, Thora, Mara, Rama, Mariposa and Eldon. IF Parties entrusting their Sales to me may rely upon the utmost attention being given to their interests. WM. GORDON, Sunderland P.O, Brock. 'Attention! The undersi; zoned would respectfully call the ,@, YOUNG SMITH, LL. B, ApeisTEe, Attorney-at-Law, Solicitor in hancery, and Insolvency, Notary Pub lie, &c,, &0' MoMillan's Block, Brock Street, Whit- A a «BAMERON & MACDONELL, ARBISTERS and Attorneys at Law, Joliciters County Council Ontario. Offices: ue. .. | H. J. MACDONELL. ** JAMES LAMON, RNEY at Lag, Solieltor ia Chauetey, A ancer, go en Cy al deh: g WF Armstrong's fotel, Main FAREWELL & MOLE, ' RRISTER. ttorney licitors, Con- y Sree one Oshawa.-- Office, oor Post Office ; and 85 Bowmanville, office Mr. Feeter's Block, oppo- 8. PAREWELL, LLB. | R. MGEE, B. A. JOHN BILLINGS, . RISTER, Attorney al Law, Solicitor , Notary Public, Conveyancer, 08 Albert. Office over in the Royal Port Perry. : won 3: A, HURD (oF ln Chun citor in - AEN a the Royal Arcgde, Port Perry. 1 Pentistry, AAA TA NARAARAAAAAAA A AAARAAARAAAA MAAAARA NAAN C. D WAID _SargeonDentist,Ccr. Wain&Brock St. Uxbridge LL Dental opera- A ti performed ith the utmost. skill snd are, warranted to ve, 2_0F no "defy compet) | tiony i: 4 t + Asodealer in all kinds of Jewelry, Fancy qian (rods, . i H. P. Griggs, Port ope; Rev. a Rarsapsch Whitby ; Jos.-- Gould, Esn., Ux- i A 3, Dec, 17, 1868. So-1y OE eco eee wi iti GN. VARS RACTICAL Dentist, Oshnwa, Ont~-- Dental Rooms directly oposite the post oa entrance Simcoe street, third door north of the Ontario Bank, of those wishing the servicesof an Auctioneer, that he is prepared to attend sales on the shortest notice anywhere in the County of Ontario. Tank Nous and Bill Stamps kept constantly on hand. Ho is sole Agent for the best and cheapest family Sewing Machine in the Dominion--pat- ented June, 1871. The Patent Letter A Family Sewing Machine is acknowledged by Tailors, Milliners, and all who know the properties of Sewing Machines who have had the pleasure of esamining it to be the best and cheapest in the Dominion. Ladies make sure work, and pur- chase the Patent Letter A, and you Will have the best machine for $30. All Machines war- ns attended to on the shortest notice. J. C. PILKEY, SoLE AGENT. Epsom, Sept. 1, 1871. THOS. H. WALSHE. ICENSED Auctioneer for the Town- ships of Brock, Thorah, Mara & Rama in NorthOntario; Mariposa, ete., in the Connty of Victoria. Residence--Cannington, Brock. Or- ders left at this office; or at his residence will be punctual iy itenided 0. I Le oan nington, or otherwise, and prompt remi pis Remember-- WALS. , the North On- tario Auctioneer. JOHN CHRISTIE, OWNSHIP CLERK for Reach, Con- veyancer, Commissioner of the Court ° ueen'sBench, &c. i carefully ce--Manchester. Marriage Licenses ! Issued by Authority. E. MAJOR Jan'y 1st, 1870 Marriage Licenses (BY AUTHORITY.) Re at Port Perry. Office," the Scraoa Hey HENRY CHARLES. Port Perry, Nov. Hith, 1869 ° | Stages to and from Whit 39-1y AUCTIONEERS] rights and the Registration of Trade Marks and 36 {on by hotels AA AA AAA AA SA AAAS Royal Canadian Hotel, PORT PERRY. The;Subscriber having leased the above Hotel has fitted up ina style in keeping with the rapidly increasing business and prosperty of the Village and neighborhood, and with direct re- ference to the comfort and convenience of the public. Strict attention paid to the Table and the Bar. Comfortable Stables and attentive Hostlers. Neither labor nor expense will be spared in making the Royal Canadian Hotel worthy of public patronage. HENRY FOY. Port Perry, June 16, 1869. "REVERE HOUSE." MANCHESTER PROPRIETOR. HA Re purchased the above hotel, and has furnished the Bar with the choicest liquors and cigars. Every attention paid to guests. -- ¢ call daily. Careful ostlers always in attend Mackie's otel, (LATE BRODIE'S,) WALTON STREET, PORT HOPE Wn. MACKIE, Proprietor. Jewett's Hotel, KENT STREET, LINDSAY. Good stable and shed attached, and an attentive ostler always in attendance. rs and Boats. DAFOE HOUSE URNEIC A 00D accommodations. Careful attention J to the requirements of travelers and guests. The bar supplied with the best wines, liquors and cigars Good stabling. Centre Hotel, : SAINTFIELD, JAS. © SRON, Proprietor. Albion Motel, WHITBY. A. MASON, ProPRIETOR. This Totel has undergone a thorough renova- tion and been fitted up with a view to the com- a A A COMPOUND PERSONAL. THE DEVILTRIES OF TWO WISCHIEVOUS YOUNG LADIES--HOW A LOT OF SOFT- HEADED YOUNG MEN WERE " TAKEN IN" AND ' soLn." AMONG the other aptfactions of a cer. taiu literary paper published in Boston, but having quite a large circulation in New York, is a ¢ Personal" column wherein soft leads or infringing ones: may spread their nets for the unwary. A ma- jority of the former patronize the depart- ment most, as onyone may see, who is curious enough to read over their nam--- by-pamby appeals ond propositions. They generally read after this fashion : youn Lady of literaryabilities and poetic longings, Lut who feels herself alonein this cold and unsympathetic world, would like to correspond with some young gentleman similar- ly eituated in this terrestial wilderness, with a view to an interchange of sentimehts which may lead to something more confidential, Address Mavpe. Again we come across such an effusion as the! following : A GOOD-LOOKING Sentimental youth desires to A correspond with some authorities who, like himself, is desirous of being great in the world of letters, and who would lend the light of a buoyant heart to cheer the glooms of his own. Address Byrox, etc. But they vary considerably, and run all the way from a high toned Byron to the effu-ions of a rollicking schoolgirl, desir- ous of entering into the world of practics] romance. In fact, we suspect that a good proportion of these soft *¢ Personals' em= inate from youthful brains desirous of in- dulging in a little flatation and innocent deviltry. Butto cw story. Not long siuce a couple of you'g ladies tock it into their pret:y Leads to have some + Personal" fun at the expense of whoever might prove gullable enough to Le taken in. So, in a late issue of the paper allud- . | fort and convenience of the traveling public.-- Every attention will be paid to the table and | bar, while obliging and atientive hostlers: will have charge of the stables. Whitby, 20th June, 1870. 25 | | | OHAS. THORN, V.S., EMBER of the Veterinary Institute, Chica- go, 11. Gold Medalist for the best exami- nation on Horse Practice. Author of a First Prins Essay on Shocing. Graduated Sept. 18, 1867. Dr. Thorn begs to announce that he has taken up his residence at Port Perry. and is now pre- pared to treat all cases entrusted to his care in the most skillful and scientific manner. All or- ders left at the Medical Hall of Messrs. Allisor. & Pettet, will receive prompt attention. 37 The Veterinary Stables may be found on Lilly street, opposite Cossitt's Fact: Iy. Port Perry, July 27, 1871. 30 HENRY GRIST PATENT SOLCITOR AND IRAUGHTCCN, | OTTAWA, CANADA, Transacts business with the Patent Office and other departments of the Government. Copy- Designs procured. Drawings, Specifications, and other Documents necessary to secure Pa- tents of Invention prepared oa receip® of the Model of the Invention. REFERENCES, Hon. Smillie, JOHN McDONALD, MARBLE DEALER NEWCASTLE, ONT. ONUMENTS, Tomb-Tables, Head Stones of great variety, with every.description of Marble Work, suitable for Cemeteries, supplied at short notice, Also Peterhead and Aberdeen Granite. 03 Parties will find it to their advan- tage to withhold their orders until called J.C. WILLIAMSON, Agent. Satisfaction guaranteed, and all work war- ranted. January 10, 1872. 3-1y MONEY (PRIVATE FUNDF,) 2 Toloan on good Farms, at 8 per cent interest LYMAN ENGLISH, Barrister, &c., : : 9 ews November 21, 1866. MONEY 10 LEAD REDUCED RATES. 1 f M now prepared to lend any amount o A ne NR mati of Good Farm, or Pro- ductive Town Property at the lowest possible rate of interest in sums and manner to suit bor. rowers. Principal can be repaid by yearly ine stalments or in one sum. Several well cultivated Farms and Lots or 'Wild Land for sale cheap. Investments made ln Debentures, Mortgages, and other Securities. Silver and Greenbacks bought and sold. For further particulars, apply to JAMES HOLDEN, Official Assignee, Money Broker, &e. = "| friends, as fond of fun as they were, were _| taken iuto their confidence, snd enjoyed ed 10, they published this eard : No sooner had the epistles been dis- took her beaux into the sceret, and the particular box spoken of in the letters was engaged for the eventful night. Then each of them fell to dreaming, talking and anticipating what the result would be, un. til"they nearly skimmed the cream frem the denouement. But the night in question finally 'ar. rived, and all hands were ready and anx. ious, Soon after the doors were opened, one dandy after another began to arrive. each was dressed in the beight of ex- quisiteness, and each wore a small white bequetiin the left lappel of his coat. Each also carried a small cane with a- white ivory handle. Such an array of fashionable young men, all with the same tokens, and all entered near the front of the orchestra, not only astonished the rest of the aud- ieoce, but there were not a few anxious among them, as one after another of the victims came in ond took their sea's. What &id it mean? Was it simply a coincidence, a happen so ? It must be they all appeared to think so, for aside from the angry glances which they east at each other, here appeared to be no suspicion aroused in auy of them, Besides, the last test, the rising fiom the seat with the cane to the lips, as the curtdin fell after the first act, would be a final proof, {and each cne hugged himself closer and waited events. The custaiu finally went up, and the eyes of the curious audience were at las taken (rom tliem to the stage, greatly to their relief, for they appeared to be con- By a fun-loving Young Lady, re- c Uity of New York, but whose ons curb her joyous emotions, ha handsome g man of | Wi aristocratic rela to correspond w good family and p | a congenial, confiding and sympathetic friend Beauty; social position, love of the refined, the! beautiful, and the humorons indispensible. Ad-| areas ** Beavry," Box --, N.Y the public, they awaited the replies. They | did not have to wait long, for before the | end of the week the porfuned bi et dour poured in upon them in & perfect shew- | er. | And «uch bllet doug ! such protests- never awakened until] they read Beauty's carc--such gushing and egotism --such loving appeals for tious of innocence photograph of " the sweet one whose sim- ple wish bad captivated them?--such at- tempts at being fonny, as a specinien of what they could and id crjoy, because it was inberitent in them --such glowing de- scriptions [the beautiful which they wor shipped, were never seca oF heard be-- fore. The two mischiels came niar going wild with delight ; it was almost too much for them to endure and remain sane, and proved too much for them to keep to them: selves. Two or three of their lady the reading of the passionate billet donz Tren they all set to work aswering them after a formula agreed upon between them, until oser fifty had been made happy each one thinking himself the favored und only one. In the course of a few days answers came back, and each one begged an inter-- view or a carie-de-visite. The ycung elfins were in an ecstacy of delight, bu jost bow 10 _mapage such an army of anxious candidates they could not , at fiest determine. At length it was agreed to answer eachone of them after this fash ion-- My Drar Friexp,--I have baen revolving the matter of meetiog over in. my mind. . I fear have been rash, and that it will be impossible to meet ag both of us desired. But I have hit upon a aa will toa certain extent please us both Next Cuesday evening, it has been arranged t! I should go, in company with a few of our family friends to Wa'lack's Theatre, fo see ** Rosedale" The right hand upper box has keen engaged, and I will be seated next to the stage so t you cannot help seeing me; but as I have quite as much wniely to see you as you have to see me, you will oblige me by being seateb in the orches- tra, as near the front as possible. make as- surance doubtly sure, please wear a whitebouquet in the left Jappel of your coat, and carry a small white-handls Jane. When the curtain fal's at the end of the first act, will you stand up in your seat and bring the handle of ¢ane to your lips? This can be done without exciting atten- tions and I will wave my handkerchief slight] in recognition, so that we both ean know eac! other, and the better understand whether it will be agreeable to continue the friendship so happily begun, Don't fail to follow instruc- tions, and you will make glad the heart of * BeauTy. » A copy of this letter was sent to each of the waiting lovers, and Mr. Moss was at once beseiged with applications for or= chestra chairs for Tuesday night. Being nearly a week in advance, they lad no trouble in being accomodated, and so ev- erything was arranged in the loveliest OFFICE--MeMillian's Block, Brock Streef. Whitby, Sept. 29, 1870, 39-1 (alike, and all wearing white boquets, were , | back out of sight. This advertisement once placed b fore | arivate scious that 50 many men dressed to much attracting considerable attention. Tle youag ladies and their gentleman friends came purposely late, and sat well They h d toned them es down by resolution, so that their risib'es were well under control, and 'with hones' faces they waited events. They could see the amorous popinjays and the patched then each of the young vixens and bewildered exchange of glances | AH SKOOT. 'THE HEATHEN CHINEE IN A NEW CHAR- ACTER--MURBER MOST FOUL. Not far from San Jose, says a Cali fornian exchange, lives an old lady whose frugality has merged so closely upon par. simony that she has actually the reputa= tion of being miserly. She has a son whose wild habits, dissolute ways and propensity tor practical jokes will some day lead to the gallows, or editing a paper in San Jose. Next but by no means least in the trio whose names will be passed down to history through this recital, is a worthy representative of the Flowery Kingdom named Al Skaot--the latter very fond of experimening. Now to the facts: Not longsince a party consisting of a baker's dozen of San Jose ladies visited the rancha where the old lady, hy raising chickens, keeps the wolf from the door, and drops an occasional five cent piece into the deacon's hat. The ladies belonged to the sewing circle, and the old lady de termined, in the fuluess of her heart, to decapitate a chicken, upon which these thirteen bungry Christians were to dine. Ah Skoot received his orders to that effect, and immediately repaired to the poultry yard to carry them into execution (the orders, not the poultry.) How to catch a chicken in the day time was now the difficult problem which exercised the brain of the Chinee. About this time, Jim, the old lady's son, Love in sight, and to Ah Skoot's interrogatories, ans- wered in this wise : 'Now, look here, Skoot, you jest get some corn, and I'll tell you what to do then.' The necessary articles were soon pro- cured. HOW IT WAS DONE IN 1790, A-courtin of a Sunday night Went Brother donathan, Io homespur: trousers, coat so tight, With yaller buttons on. He eat down by the kitchen fire, Nancy on other side ; Ah! she was all his hears desire, This girl with mouth so wide. He talked awhile with Bill and Joe. About the sheep aud oxen, And how some men to Church 44d gd Wit} their every doy smock frocks. Then slightly hitching in his chair, * Do you love maple syrup?" And then be grinned to Nanoy fair, And gave her such a stit-pp; He rot and sot till nine o'clock. Then rising said, (just fancy) «I gneea 1 rgust be going now ; Good evenin'all, Miss Naney:" Now do not smile at this shy youth, For sure the man did fancy That kichen fall of men ; in truth, It held but his own Naucey. He wedded ler one lovely night ; Then, when his hair was groyet Than any goose eer in your sight, He was elected mayor. And then he went to Ginral Court, _ After, 10 Washington -- His follow-townsmen knew the worth Of Brother Jonathan. { And Nancy a fair dame became When she was fat and forty, Her clear geod scuse kept her from ehame Amo ig the matrous haughty. And still the earth holdeth but one Woman for him -- just fancy -- For President. he's bound 10 run, And still be true to Nancy. een CORRECT SPEAKING, We advise all young people to acquire in early fifo the habit of correct speaking and The hopeful James lad loaded a gun | full up to the mazzle, and telling Skoot | to throw down some corn about two hundred chickens put in an appearance.-- Now, the Chinaman, as before stated, was quite fond of experiments, and reaching for the gun be tock aim at a noble rooster towerinz above the others in the pride of his youtk and roosterhood, and entirely earching glances (hey cast towards the boxes. | They kept themselves | just sufficiently out of siplit to assure them i that the box was occupied, and pretended | to be greatly interested in the progress of | the play. of the young ladies took ler seat at al appointed place next to the stage. She was as beautiful as Ilcbe, and every vie-- tim's eye was riveted upon ler, | Ilach | one of them forgot the pay, the curiosity | of ihe audience or the fears of being mis. | taken for thise with low cach the same favors one of them hated the mo~ ments dragged along with leaden feet, bey | fore they could cap the climax of their happi ness by rising and performing the remain- der of the litle programme. At last the curtain began to descend. Hardly had it struck the stage before the entire crowd of victims displaying their favors and bringing their eanes to their lips almost at the same instant. Simultaneously the entire party in the private box came to the front and looked down upon them. The girls could hold in no longer, and burst out with a laugh so hearty and so catching that people joined in it out of pure sympaiby. The victims turned and looked at each other, at the audience who had caught the sense of the 'sell,' huge and rollicking, and then at each other. I'he situation was ludicrous in the extreme. The young mischiefs and their company were all 1| standing up. waving their handkerchiefs, | laughing immoderately, and fn an instant the entire andience com; r hended the joke and yelled with delight. Such a sheepish, cliop fallen lot of fops it would be bard to imagine. 'They seem. ed petrified for a moment, recovering from which they saw the 'sell' in all its breadth and scope.--They didn't stay upon the order cf their going, but went at once, each holding down his head and ap- parently doing some very tall mental curs- ing. It required a long time after they had vacated the place to get the audience quieted down, ro uproarious had they be- come over the viétims. Their chairs were vacant during the remainder ot that perfor- mance, and it is eale to say that none of them will be in a hurry about answering | another gushing Personal, lest it might prove like this, a pompound ove. re ree ~~. A Sioux City paper tells of a wiman there who "died, and was dead (wo Lours manner possible, unsuspicious of the coming storm. Its perhaps needless to state that James immediately ensconed himself behind a lirge tree, out of harm's way, | About this time a report, which would | masse, rushed out to the " scene | Al first nothing was visi- | ' | b'e except smoke and dust, next about the slaugler. five score of chickens were rising and falling, flopping snd squeaking. The ground was strewn with the mangled re. ! mains of atout forty wore, while the re- | mainder of this once interesting flock | were making for neighboring ranches 10 avoid another earthquake. But what of Ab Skoot ? Did that mass of torn and disheveled 1ags resemble the once festive youth, whose'delight had once been to evperiment ? It was he. I'he kind ladies approached him, and tenderly, oh, so tenderly, essayed to administer spiritual consolation from a black bottle which the old lady produced. By-and-by the distorted features showed signs of animation, seeing which the old lady said , + Speak to me! Skooty! Ob, speak to me !' John raised his head and gave vent to the following-- ¢ Speakee! Wassy mater, speakee ? More brandy, more brandy! Too much shooty ¥' It is, perhaps, unnecesszry to add that James is now in quest of a situation. Sunday out-- Betsey : * Shall you be a. goin' out this afiernoon, mem ?' Mistress : 'I think not, Betsey.' Betsey: ¢ Cos' yer can if yer like, 1 don't want ter go out. tt ---- A crusty old bachelor sends us the fol- lowing conundrum : What is the difterence between a honeycrmb and a honeymoon 7 A honeycomb consists of a number of smal | ¢ cells," and a honeymoon consists of one great « sell"? i : Adding insult to injury--trusting a man man and then asking him to pay you.-- This is the way some folks view it--but there are none of that opinion bereabous, ob, no, of course not. ¢ Gentlemen of the jury,' said a blander- ing counsel, in & suit about a lot of hogs» "There were thirty-six. hogs in that drove. Piouse 10 remember that facl-- thirty-six hogs ; just thiee times as many as in that jury box, gentlemen.' The counsel didn and recovered again," writing, and to abandon as early as possible any use of slang words and hrases, The longer vou live, the more difficult the acquisition of correct language will be; and if the golden age of youth, the proper season for the acquisition of langnages be passed in iis abuse, the unfortonate victim of neglected education is very properly doomed to talk slang for life. Money is not necessary (o procure education. Every man has it in his power. He has merely to use the language whieh Le reads instead of the slang whicli Le Lears; to form his taste from the best speakers and poets of the country ; to tren-1 + up choice phrases in his memory, and Labituate himself to | have done credit to a twenty--feur pounder | their use, voiding, at the same time, that Just before the end of the first act one | aroused the folks in the house, who en | peda tic precision sd bombast: whieh { | show the weakness of vain ambition, rather than the polish of an educated mind. eet rere A young wan trom the country, out walk- ing with a young lady, cadgelled his brains fOr some interesting topic of cot versation to amuse hier with, but in vain; he conld hit upon nothing until they met several cows, when the swain said, with much simplicity of manner :--¢ Now, isn't it strange what a has? To whieh the lady rephed, <1 don't think it strange sir, that a cow should Lave a motheily appeatatce to a calf.' motherly appearance a cow ret ere The passion for antiquities is on the iu- crease, but the old ladies are not more ap- preciated than ever. It is ove of the par- adaxes of life that the men who want their wine always old, want their wives always young. ee---- A ------ei-- Samuel Goodrulge, of Canaan, Me., is the oldest man in New Englaud--105 years. His last farm labor was performed in his ninety-ninth year. His wife lived to be ninety+-seven, and their oldest child is now living at the age of eigh'y-one. rr ---- ee A lineal deecendant of Martina Luther, it is said, is living 1 New York city, aud possesses a silver medal presented on the ial 'of Martin Luther's birthday, by the King of Prussia, 10 one of his ancestors who was known to be a ger.uine Luther. 8 A young miss in a recitation in geography informed her ustonished teacher that ¢ the mammoth caravan, in Kentucky, is the greatest living curiosity, and has been ex= plored ten miles from its mouth.' et ee eee A conductor of an omwuibus says to a young lady, one of his passengers, ¢ Miss, your fare.' ¢ Well, if I am,' she replied," = 3 EF i i I i ; ) - ¢1 don't want any of your impertinence." ec tl A--. Jeems sends the following conundram for this column : what is the difference between a utencil for carrying cosl, and a fresh codfish ? Oue isa coal bod and ~ the other is a whole cod. me eee A youog.miss who has just left school shows her unusual wisdom by though she correspouds wit Severs] guin his case. that gentleman she always wriles with a bard i pebell, and never signs ber name,