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< wp" 20. Scugog, Citizen -- Tuesday, October 22, 1991 "Hi, Thelma. I haven't had a moment jo phone and thank you for organizing the family reunion this year. Gosh, it was great to see everyone again. What a lot of work for you. It must have taken ages to plan. However, much as we are all grateful, there are just a couple of things I would like 1 point fo you for next year's reunion. The bungee jumping was a hoot, but you have to very precise when you measure the rubber cords, or con- versely; you should make the «~jump-off sfand a shade higher. In future, I'wouldn't bother with the ferris wheel. It's no big deal but it does involve a lot of work. And putting Aunt Heather and her cousin Winnie together on it was a big mistake. Surely, you know that'they don't get along. It doesn't help matters that Aunt Heather has a queasy wmmy, a chose that p cruel joke to bring up his indiscre- tion in public. Besides, I saw him going into that#motel with Carolyn, not Lorna. And Rose does not refer to hér mother-in- law as the "beast from hell." You should gat your facts straight. You're confusing her with Joan. Everyone knows 'it is she who can't stand her mother-in-law. Why do you insist on those stupid, three-legged races? If you have to have them, is it 100 much 10 ask you to put people together who are about the same size. I'm 5'7" and I don't appreciaté being tied to Ethel who is 4'11." I mean, all we did was go around in cir- cles. You just didn't want me to win, did you. I know you don't like Della and Gert, but I think it showed a lot of class when every- one else had rope tied around their legs and you put barbed wire on theirs! You know how Gert is a lose it. Plus, as you are aware, she is ified of heights and promising ell be featured in National irer just because you want pictires of her isn't fair, Thelma. I must say the cute little gossip thing you did at the podium was clever, but are you nuts? Barry and Letitia have been in coun- seHing for months, and it was a bom , anyway. On the positive side, you were wise to forego the sack races this year. 1 thank yoii for got including the wheel-barrow races as well. There's something about tearing down a field, holding onto some- one's'legs while they frantically claw the ground. It makes us both look foolish, Thelma. Fhis is the era of video. cameras and nobody wants to end up on Candid a K - i : - [by nobel oo] THE Reunion Camera. We know you should not have to do everything, so perhaps next year you delegate the job of food preparation to someone else. Once again, you had Aunt Sophie make the rum souffle. I found her out in the back field planting the eggs, and theiogile of rum was nowhere to be fou : It was wonderful to see all the little kiddies enjoying the petting 200, but there is a difference between cows and bulls. Bulls have nasty tempers and I'm begin- ning to wonder if there is a bit of a sadistic syreak in you, having the children dress up in red devil cos- tumes. I was surprised you had pigs this year, You amaze me, you are always thinking of new ideas, aren't you? Toss this thought around, though. You want to con- sider live ones next time. And please give us a break. Don't dress them up in century costumes. Bonnets on pigs look ridiculous. Where did you get those horses for the hay ride? I have a feeling I saw thém running in the Queens Plate. And never, ever sit Uncle Harold beside me, that old goat. . One last thing before I hang up, Thelma! Next year, plan the reunion for YOUR back-yard; not mine. Thelma?............Thelma? Are you there?" For the Young at Heart By Joe . Mahoney ~ (On Harvest Moon (HARRY, DO You: Do You NEED THINK WEE FALLEN VICTIMS THE ANSWER 70 A BURNING RIGHT AWAY "PASSIONATE og CAN TFAX DESIRE FOR you IN THE EACH OTHERP one ? ERVICE DIRECTORY Miscellaneous Services Scugog .- Appliance Repair REFRIGERATION |-Now & Used Parts for the Handyman New & Used Nestleton (416) 986-4564 "* RON LEE i SEPTIC & HOLDING TANK PUMPING Mobile (416) sla : 3 Fi 4 RESIDENTIAL COMMERCIAL Miscellaneous . {ig 985-4357 * "Recover ARTA, UPHOLSTERY k 60 ALD DRIVE - i 8- PORT PERRY ye NSH ous 732 1s Woodstoves - Fireplaces - [nserts DUDE IMD RETAIL WOOD * NATURAL GAS * PROPANE / INSERT * FIREPLACES * STOVES INSTALLATIONS 985-0715 60 Vandedward Dr., Unit #7, Port Perry _Consulting Ser vice S : : CONSULTING - " RESEARCH ; PROJECT MANAGEMENT - FEASIBILITY REPORTS + ColinL. Kemp Phone (416) 986-4305. Fax (#16) 986-5865 Landscaping : ind Gar TREE _-- ux LTD. 5,85 (Aor) aay Bue 852. 3Ti87 Warren Rohrer Minihos & Landscaping -- certified landscape designer MINIHOE SERVICE - - BEE wen ol AT 110 986-5318 Ee