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AEN Ca 8 a NY A _ pia b uel RYR RNY ¥ vn. 334 TAT aT BRL ae be 8 hr p £ 's a at + Wl 4 8 BAe Tt EARL Sl Ria! LAC FA AAS Mn eh A TEES het rh | TEs SHS ot ta "A 1) Al a Lola Arle a A BT 8 NL AER A BR AT ET TN AA "+i % TY Bu SNE Se A Liea™ FF rs § a RASTA EAN SAA aN LE 1", \ ATA Fahy anand AE RHEE 0) Foti SAAN ROS 13 LL SEER EEA TAT v ade 54, Ye rb ed) LAY (Rieky 8 IY Tire SF ae OARS ERR hr ENA TR 0 TR Ce TH OT SAT RA a AAT Bod RA Rp Sea mae IR a Be ds eA is er Rd ns AN 1:33 TEU fa FREER : 4 -- PORT PERRY STAR, THURSDAY, APRIL 23rd, 1964 When Our Hair Has Turned to Silver . . . » Editorial Viewpoint Call Back Yesterday The following editorial first appeared just ten years ago, in the April, 1954 issue of Industry, under the title "Uncle Podger is Dead": ) SAID... | | WHEN THEY FINALLY GET THIS PENSION THING GOING -- WE'LL ze oping our / : pane) : Uncle Podger, it seems, is dead. This gentleman, once representative of a type, always used to affirm that employing a professional for such simple household chores as replacing the glass in a broken window or a washer in a leaking faucet was not only a needless waste of money, but a downright slur upon his personal abilities. >a When a picture needed a new cord, Uncle Podger PR A ER Ee FEL ct cm 2. would assemble the whole family and have everybody ' | standing around to hold him steady on the ladder and i hand him tools. Then he would drop the picture and iY cut his hand on the glass; drop the nail; lose the ham- Rd mer; lose the mark he'd made on the wall; smash his Wa thumb with the first blow and drive the nail and half Aint the hammer through the plaster with the second. About \ ih midnight ,the picture would be up, with the wall for Wed yards around looking as though it had been smoothed A down with a rake. ) Nowadays, things are different. A piece of elemen- tary carpentry to be done? Why, the modern home-owner has been learning that at night classes for the last two years. A drain is blocked? Goodness, he just pops round a to the local bookseller and buys a "How-to" book--it will all be set down there. The man of the house still has confidence in his ability to do the necessary. Nowadays he is justified in his confidence. As with greatness, some men are born to skill in craftsmanship. They may perhaps spend their days in > offices, but, give them a few tools and an idea, and they find real pleasure in an evening's pottering. They take as naturally to doing household jobs as a duck takes to water. ) Then there are those who achieve skill. They are the middle-of-the-way men. In their houses, jobs are "usually put off in favour of a book and a deep armchair. A But, when a feminine foot begins to tap in earnest, the book is put aside and, surprising as it may seem, a com- a ed : ) petent job is rapidly performed. Rememher When? | Su ar and S ; Lastly, there are the amateurs who have had skill WE : dg : plLce thrust upon them -- largely by the mounting cost of pro- NTY-FIVE YEARS AGO : : fessional services. They do not like hand-work and 'are April 20th, 1939 : ~ By BILL SMILEY a not very good at it. But if a thing needs doing and money Open Season for Muskrats is tight, by tears and sweat they will do it somehow. extended to April 30th. Due to RIGHT IN THE EYE! : unsatisfactory weather condi- The do-it-yourself movement is spreading rapidly. = tions which have prevailed, ar- If ever you decide to do some research on the lower forms Home repairing by American owners is now held to be rangements have been made to of wit, I can tell you how to go about it. Just get yourself a a $3,500,000,000 business. This year it is estimated that extend the open season for black eye. \ $24,000,000 will be spent on paint rollers alone and that Muskrats until April 30th, 1939 I had a doozer recently, My wife gave it to me. All right. . 65 to 85 percent of all paint is being used by amateurs as in various sections of the Prov- Not that way. She was sitting in the car, waiting for me to opposed to professionals. ince. . fay fe Eb Bus the house, through the rain: Just as I : * kx x ent and reached for the car door to open it and ask: i The movement is certainly growing in Canada, too. TEN YEARS AGO was all, she opened it smartly from the inside = 2 hi Not only is it evidenced by the practical classes already April 22nd. 1954 I hadn't brought out an unbrella mentioned and the many books published for the purpose, pr, <=aith 1 When : = : : Sard Port Perry Lions Club to - en the door nailed me in the eye, I thought I was a but companies are finding a very valuable market among , "7. . ol, 1 Chari goner. My wife shrieked and ran straight into the h home owners who are doing household jobs themselves ey '% Buje " arity sce whether my "loss of limb or eye" ey 2 a § sous 10 4 and large department stores are running shows, exhibi- wh April ri Hee up. : OH Doliys Wad had tion and demonstrations for interested parties. well-known radio and T.V. Lar Within a few minutes, the eye was the size and color Yes, Uncle Podger seems to be dead. Requiescat In is to appear with his regular of a bartender's beezer. But by the time we'd finished argu- Pace. His son does things in a. different fashion. comedy routines and songs. ~A ing about whose fault it had been, it was obvious that I'd live. i tasty luncheon is planned for * kk about midnight and this-is to We didn't have a piece of steak, and if we'd had, I doubt 0 ASN SN be prepared by the Staff of the os it would Rone hoa sacrificed. But the Old Girl, bless her, High School Cafeteria under ug out some hamburg that was going a bit blue, and made SUGAR AND SPICE the direction of Lion J. L. Crane, Me lie down with a big hamburg poultice on the injured optic. suggested that she not let the divorce alienate her from my Principal. : Right off the ice, it felt pretty good at that, and I dropped wife. I left her with her mouth open. Lk kx off to sleep, moaning but brave. During the night, the bandage FIFTY YEARS AGO worked loose, and when I woke in the dark, I thought the eye 1 quickly disposed of an elderly lady, strong in the tem- perance movement, by informing her the injury had been re- Wed., April 22nd, 1914 had fallen out. But it was only hamburg, all over the pillow. ¥ Next morning, the orb looked like a purple golf ball.- W. ceived from my young daughter, when she clubbed me on the ~~ WHITBY --The Manager of i 0 th vii eye with a half-empty whiskey bottle, It's good sport. Next the Windsor Hotel, Whitby was Patched it up as best we could, and I set-off to face the wits, ~~ \ ; , Fes 4 The comments were hilarious. They ranged f: the si time the old trouble-and-strife hangs one on you, Jack, you'll * fined $20 and costs in each Miance : S from the simple, | te is el) 4p ' ' cane for cashing workmen's dry brilliance of "Hoo hitcha?" and "Forget to duck, eh?" to ® --Toronto Telegram News Service cheques, a practice contrary to the coy, insinuating, "I knew she'd catch up with ya some day.", _ law which forbids hotel-keepers __They ran the scintillating gamut from the inevitable, "I suppose : to do this. The total fine Y2 ran into a door" to the ineffably humorous sally, "Meet the 6 P P St C Li d amounted to $124. former welterweight champ of the Smiley household." orl erry ar 0. ° SEAGRAVE -- It is rumored " : back with x > a : there is a' Union formed by the I came back with some real funnies myself. "My wife," I J Serving Port Perry, Brooklin and Surrounding Areas laboring men of this vicinity to replied. "Footwork isn't what it used to be." I admitted. | P. HVIDSTEN, WM. T. HARRISON maintain a standard scale of Yotta see the other guy," I quipped. I can go along with a | Publisher Editor wages. Anyone wishing to be- joke as well as the next bird. | = 1 come. a member can do' 20 by But after a while, in fact if I remember rightly, it was just ¢ Member of the Member of the getting in touch with the Sec- after the fourteenth "Hoo hitcha?", I began getting a littl Canadian Weekly Ontario Weekly retary, Mr. G. Sornberger. sore. I mean, fun's fun, you know, but, after all. Sa Newspaper Assoc. Newspaper Assoc. + ALSO Seagrave--There is a : 3 So, when the next joker made his move, I told him, dole- ¥ move on foot, supported by the ully, that a maiden lady who didn't like my column had ; Published every Thursday by The Port Perry Star | better class of Doty. iy put acid in my face, and that I'd never have Whe sight of Ai Ha J ~ Co, Ltd, Port Perry, Ontario. . a stop to this bringing bottles He turned green. = ; = Authorized as second class mail by the Post Office of liquor into our Village. This ~My next customer was a woman, who tittered, "That'll - v Department, Ottawa, and for payment of postage in cash. | {is the last warning to the per- teach you to write things about your wife in that column of Subscription 'Rates: In Canada $2.50 per yr. gons guilty, as they are well yours." I gave her a gentle, sad look from my good eye, and Elsewhere, $3.00 per yr. Single Copy 7¢ known and the law will be en- : : ; : pT STE ENS Te ety an nrc nei Mo foveed to the Al imit, «= thermo ~« (Continued on Column 1 and 2 on this page) SAA 2 L . x § 3 fa PA : sid 3 \