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6 -- PORT PERRY STAR -- Tuesday, March 8, 1988 Library lining up One Woman's View | March Break program Sharks, it appears, are in need of a lesson in telephone etiquette. Impatiently awaiting their turn on the telephone line, sharks have taken matters into their own hands--or rather jaws--and they're tak- ing big bites out of our conversations. Without concern for who is speaking to whom about what, and without care that they may be in- terrupting Betty's annual call home to Mother, they are actually biting into the telephone cables under the ocean. Better telephone cables than human limbs, but disturbing just the same. Imagine trying to negotiate a hefty overseas business contract only to be disconnected as a result of a shark's over-zealous interest. The next week when the lines are back in place you call up only to find out that two-legged sharks have taken over where the toothy ones left off and have circl- ed in to snag your deal. According to Dr. Geraldine Kenney-Wallace, chairman of the Science Council of Canada, sharks are attracted to the fibre optic telephone lines. And every time they take a bite, it costs $250,000 to repair the damage. That has necessitated research on how to protect the lines. The first thing researchers will have to find out is why the lines are being attacked. If the sharks are afraid the lines are enemies en- croaching on their territory and they're attack- ing to protect themselves, it's going to require a totally different approach than if the sharks are attracted to the lines because they think they're a beautiful new sleek species and they're falling in love. Should it be a matter of protecting territory, all they have to do is move the lines somewhere else or somehow convince the sharks that the lines aren't going to reach out and touch their young. Should the sharks be losing their hearts to the streamlined beauties, a lack of response should do it. Just let the cables float or lie where they may, ignoring the sharks' attentions and maneouvers. Nothing turns a heart off like no answer. by Chris Carlisle CALLING ALL SHARKS It's possible that the lines themselves are frightening the tuna and mackeral and grouper and all the other tasty fishes in the sea. To these unintelligent creatures, the phone lines could be a huge, hungry sea snake that will mean trouble when the head finally appears. Therefore, they're swimming as far away as possible which makes mealtime difficult for the sharks. And that could be why the sharks are attacking the lines. The other possibility of course is that the sharks are irritated by the incessant chatter along the lines. Imagine being stuck in your home with 40,000 voices all babbling on at once in a hundred different languages:-Non-stop, twenty-four hours a day, three-hundred and sixty-five days a year. No sooner does one conversation cease than another starts. Could be the sharks are having nervous breakdowns. "If I hear one more ringing, just one more ringing from that line, so help me I'll tear into it." And so the shark goes berserk, ripping apart the line and spewing little fibre optic wires all over the ocean floor. All the other sharks cheer and next thing you know it's become a new marine sport. Something tells me once the sharks get the drift of these new wires invading their home, it's going to be a tough battle for man. What repair man will want to venture into the shark's living room to repair the line? "Oh boy!" The sharks will shriek. "Dinner!" "It'll be like phoning out for pizza only it'll be fresh ribs that are delivered as soon as they're off the line. And always warm and fresh. Man will not be able to keep up once word spreads underseas. Conditioning and response and all that--mouse touches bar, door opens and he gets cheese; shark taps into phone line, diver ap- pears and shark gets lunch. Research into keeping sharks away from phone lines will take a long time, You can't hit the 'shark on the nose with a newspaper every time he goes near the wire, so best be prepared to be cut off at any time. Special "March Break' pro- grams are being presented especially for children at the Scugog Public Library, March © 15-19th. Tuesday, March 15th at 10:30 a.m. Kideo will present a unique program in Music. Kideo is a col- ourful three piece band that has a unique way of communicating with children ages 5-12, through the vehicle of rock and roll! Ace Manners in his brilliant blue wig and outfit, along with drummer P.J. Styles in red and bassist Bud- dy Goodfellow in green, lead kids through 45 minutes of upbeat original music which includes the lively audience participation of "Clap, Snap, Tap, Rap" and the instructing "Stranger Danger' which recommends whom children should trust. Cottage fire in Caesarea The fire which claimed a cottage in Caesarea is believed to have started in a fireplace. Owner Larry Read of Oshawa had left the structure to go snow- mobiling on Lake Scugog at ap- proximately 9 p.m. Tuesday March 1, and returned to find the cottage ablaze. Scugog Hall No. 2 (Caesarea) Firefighters received the call at 9:11, and arrived at the scene, at the west end of the village, min- utes later, but the cottage was al- ready engulfed in flame. No one was injured in the blaze, which all but destroyed the cot- tage. Firefighters remained at the scene for three hours. Kideo asks the question "Are You Afraid Of The Dark?' a song that points out it is better to face your fears than let your imagina- tion get the better of you. This special March Break program is being sponsored by your Public Library with the assistance of On- tario Library Service-Trent and the Outreach Ontario Program of the Ministry of Culture and Com- munications. Pick up your tickets in advance! Programs will be advertised in "coming events" in the paper. Other programs of special in- terest during the week Thursday March 17, 2:00 films for fun and frolic. Friday March 18, 10-12 and 2-4 Computer Orientation. Kids 6-12 can register for half hour in- struction on the Library's Com- modore 64 and the loading and use of the Library software. Saturday March 19, 10:30 a.m. a special film called "Science Fair Pro- jects" will be viewed by all the budding local Scientists in the area, who wonder what to do for Science Fair competitions. See you at the Library! \ Take OW a ad Vter SHOPLIFTING IS A CRIME This message sponsored by the Port Perry Star. Random Jottings by J. Peter Hvidsten A GOOD MOVE Councils decision last week to purchase the Orde house near Port Perry Marina was a good one for the Township and they should be congratulated on their forsite. Accumulating land along the lakefront is not a new step for a Scugog Township council. It was not too many years ago that the old Lake Scugog Lum- ber property was purchased for the same reasons. Today we are fortunate to have a bright, new public library where the old storage sheds, truss plant and retail offices of L.S.L. used to stand. And just to the east of the library is large expanse of parkland that is available to anyone wishing to use it for walking, sitting, picnicing, fishing etc. | would suspect that council has it in the back of their mind that when the time comes that other buildings or houses along the lakefront come onto the market, they may also buy these. The two that come to mind most readily are the Bertrand home beside the library and the old Mas- ter Feeds building. Both these 'pieces of land should be owned by the township and | am sure when the present owners are ready to sell they will be approached by the township. There are many who feel the old "mill" at the east end of Queen Street should come down, but | totally disagree with this and would fight such a move. The mill is the oldest commercial structure in the downtown area, having escaped the big fire of 1884 which entirely wiped out the town of Port Per- ry. One old photo shows it standing at the end of the street like a monument to the buildings which were destroyed that day in July 1884. It would be nice to see the old mill retained in its present stature, although it would need a lot of money pumped into it to refurbish it to take on the splendor of days long gone by. Removing this landmark from the end of Queen Street would take much of the character away from downtown Port Perry at a time when small towns are in need of unique and interesting structures for people to come and see. Of course everything | am saying here is only speculation, and the old mill may never be sold by the present owners. But if it should be sold, | can only hope that a new owner would bring new life back to this historic structure. Ideally it would be nice for the Township to own it, but only if they could see the value in keeping the building, not tearing it down for more parking spaces. BOOM CONTINUES Winter usually slows down the construction trade during the bleak months from December to March, but this year has been different. Speaking to some of local trades men around Port Perry, it sounds like most of them have never caught up from the backload of work they got under last year, when building in Scugog Township hit an all-time high of $40 million. Indications in the first two months of 1988 are 'that amount won't be reached this year, but never- the-less there has been a lot of building going-on ove the winter. IGA is undertaking a large expansion of their store on Queen Street, and it would appear that manager Jim Grieve has gone to some extra ex- pense to ensure the store blends with the rest of the downtown area. Already we are seeing signs of this with the arched display windows on the east side of the building and the quoining on the cor- ners of the building. Also in the works are renovations at the old Dairy Bar on Queen Street, and both the Don For- der Insurance Building and the Wally Gothelf build- ing are near completion on Water Street. Forder's building is mostly occupied now, and Gothelf's should be ready for tenants in the next couple of months. Both of these structures vastly improve the look of water street. Across 7A highway the Millwood Plaza is now completed and the owners must be commended on the beautiful job they have done. With just a little extra attention given to detail they have con- structed a very appealing strip-plaza style building. There are already three tenants enjoying their new home here and more are coming. On North Street, Blanchard's Supply are just (Turn to page 8)