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6 -- PORT PERRY STAR -- tel august 3, 1988 Editorial Comments WAY TOO MUCH How much do you think it should cost to provide "local access to permanent housing," for the people of Durham who need such a service? $25,000 per year? $50,000? Maybe $100,000? Wrong on all three numbers The cost to provide this ser- vice for a year is $312,000, every penny of it from the pockets of the tax-payers. Durham Region council voted last week to kick in "up to $62,500" annually, with the remaining $250,000 to be picked up by the provincial government, if the senior lev- el of government agrees to the project. Since most Regional councillors didn't have the guts to say NO to this scheme last week, let's hope that some- body at Queens Park has the courage to veto the idea, in the interests of those who will pay the shot: the tax-payer. The idea was hatched by the Social Development Council of Ajax-Pickering, in response to a directive from the provincial government. ) What this project will do is find permanent, affordable, comfortable housing for those citizens of Durham who need it. They are mostly young, having trouble at home, dropping out of school, sleeping in the streets, unable to find or keep a job for all of the above reasons. Sure, society has an obligation to do something for these 4979 in finding them a place to live, but at what cost? $312,000 per year? Preposterous. : What that $312,000 is going to do is create a whole new level of bureaucracy. Six full time jobs in the $30,000 per year range, three part-time jobs at half that amount for such agencies as the Big Sisters Shelters for Youth; the New Hope Interchurch Housing Group; the YWCA of Oshawa; the John Howard Society; and the Social Development Council of Ajax Pickering. We are not quibbling about the need for some kind of co-ordination in finding low cost permanent housing for those who are without. Though we wonder just how much low cost, permanent housing is available in Dur- ham these days. But does it take eight people to do it? How about one full time position at $30,000, plus office expenses. That's a far cry from $312,000 annually. Many Regional councillors had some mis-givings about this scheme, though just a few had the guts to vote against it last week. Possibily, those in favour were look- ing ahead to the municipal election, or the fact that Dur- ham Region's $62,500 share will come not directly from the tax-payers, but from an anticipated surplus in the general welfare fund. Talk about a classic example of try- ing madly to find a spot to spend those budget surpluses. But in the end, it all comes from one source: the tax- payer. Initially, the project is to run for two years. But once it ets entrenched, it's here to stay. Too bad, because that $312,000 per year might have been better spent actually building some affordable housing in Durham Region, in- stead of adding to the legions of paper pushers. 22 " J 4 ALL my LIFE I'VE BEEN COMING IN_ LAST, NOW | GET JHE FEELING I'M) NOT COMING IN AT ALL ln 714% Port Perry (QL RK 1c | | EJ) 235 QUEEN STREET - PORT PERRY, ONTARIO "ey Phone 985-7383 P.0.Box90 LOB 1NO J. PETER HVIDSTEN Publisher Advertising Manager Member of the Canadian Community Newspaper Association and Ontario Community Newspaper Association. Published every Tuesday by the Port Perry Star Co. Ltd., Port Perry, Ontario J.B. McCLELLAND Editor Authorized as second class mail by the Post Office Department, Ottawa, and for cash CATHY OLLIFFE payment of postage in cash. News & Features Second Class Mail Registration Number 0265 Subscription Rate: In Canada $20.00 per year. Elsewhere $60.00 per year. Single Copy 50° = ADVAN Conny ot Qs Nir Oy 0 \ © COPYRIGHT -- All layout and composition of advertisements produced by the adver- tising department of the Port Perry Star Company Limited are protected under copyright and may not be reproduced without the written permission of the publisher. Chatterbox by Cathy Olliffe MARSHALL THE MENACE The snake was enormous. Long and fat, the garter snake nosed its way through the grass on our neighbours' front lawn, trying to find a shady spot in the hot morning sun. Marshall spotted it right away. "Don't touch the snake, Marshall," the four year old's father, Matt, said stemly. Too late, Marshall was already making a bee- line, his chubby young legs and arms pump- ing, his eyes as big as saucers. "Marshall, don't touch the snake," Matt said, more sternly. Me and Doug and Mark From Markham were sitting on our front verandah, drinking coffee and watching to see what trouble our local *Dennis the Menace" would get into this time. "Dennis", a.k.a. Marshall, plonked down be- side the snake and promptly picked it up by its tail. Dennis's grandfather, Gord (a.k.a. Mr. Wil- son) spoke up, "Marshall, let go of the snake." Dennis ignored Mr. Wilson, his father as well as his mother and grandmother, both of whom appeared on the scene, which was rapidly growing chaotic. The little tyke was walking around the front yard dangling the hapless snake (which was nger than Dennis is tall) and showing it to the two ladies, both of whom were going "eeek" and such. "Marshall, drop the snake," Matt said, not at all calmly. "It might bite you." Dennis continued prancing around the yard, snake waving in the air. Me, Mark from Markham and Doug, mean- while, were unabashedly snickering. "IT'S GOING TO BITE YOU," Matt yelled. Dennis continued to wave the snake, bab- bling away about the creature in four year old lingo to anyone who would listen. "DROP THE SNAKE, MARSHALL." "YOU'RE GONNA GET BIT, MARSHALL." "MARRRRSHALLL..." And then it happened. The wily snake, sick of being swung around like a lasso, curled up and sunk its teeth into a startled Dennis. He screamed, dropped the snake, and start- ing bawling with all the energy of an opera singer playing Carnegie Hall. While his family quickly gathered around to check out the damage, me, Mark From Mark- ham and Doug, were laughing like loons. Mark From Markham had tears in his eyes, and | could hardly see Doug rolling around on the verandah because of tears of my own. Our sides ached, we couldn't breathe, and we continued giggling helplessly long after Dennis/Marshall was taken into the house for first aid. We were still hysterical when Matt came out of the house, and lo and behold, the child's own father was laughing too. Now, you're probably asking yourself, "What's so funny about a little kid getting bit by a snake?" First off, the bite was minor, and as every- one knows, gaffer snakes aren't poisonous. So Dennis/Marshall was okay (later, he came out brandishing a sporty new band-aid like a war medal). And secondly, we weren't really laughing at the snake incident as much as we were laugh- ing about the mischief Marshall The Menace gets into every time we see-him. Marshall's parents, Matt and Lesley, live in Scarborough, and come up to Les's parents place (Gord and Vivian) just about every week- end. Gord and Vivian live right next door to us. Ever since we moved to Caesarea, we have come to associate summertime with the call of *Marrrr-shalll." More common than the call of some birds, it echoes through the neighbour- hood a number of times a day. Summer just wouldn't be summer without it. It's not that Marshall is a brat. He's not. He's probably just a typical four year old boy with an explorer's heart. And it's this heart that gets him into a lot of mischief. At least once every weekend, we can count on Dennis/Marshall to get into some kind of redicament, and each little incident sends us urther off the edge of humour into an abyss of restraintless giggles. At first, we were embarrassed to be caught laughing whenever Dennis/Marshall would get into something--so Doug and | would run, not walk, into the bedroom, dive under covers and stuff our mouths with pillows to help stifle our laughter. But despite our efforts, Matt and Lesley re- port they have heard us on many occasions. Like the time Gord/Mr. Wilson nearly called Search & Rescue. We weren't paying too much attention to the neighbours that day--we were too busy paint- (Turn to page eight) ; - en OR ST ---- AF «fam a mA AMALIE lc iisaiualustualnam Li idalts a lo BL all LR