Wtt M ^ r^;8 ©,' •»« BIG MASSACRE M DUBLIN CITt Soldiers Shoot Down Scores of Persons at Football* * -Game. , '•'-••> 5' I- Pt-> W- h£%: «fe •• '! >' wife mw Vi,' ' is'- &r;/ ie:,' Well Organized General Attack Mad* by the Republican*--Black and '•'V. <f¥JDiUe Fire Into Crowd"; ^ V ' - ' O F 1 5 , 0 0 0 . London, Nor. 23.--London was plunged in a welter of bloodshed when warfare was openly waged between the military and the republicans. £ heavy were the casualties it is yet in possible to estimate the number or dead and wounded. Latest messages from the bullet-ridden city speak of scores of dead and the hospitals filled with wounded in the bloodiest conflict since the 1916 rebellion. Dublin castle, the seat of government In Ireland, Issued the following official statement on Sunday's Sinn Fein reprisals in Dublin: "Sinn Fein murder gangs numbering 12 to 25 each simultaneously attacked the lodgings of the military and legal officers in Dublin. Thirteen officers were killed and four were desperately wounded. All of these men were recently engaged in court-martial duties. "The assailants diligently searched for documents and succeeded In destraying a quantity of evidence.** Following a great lire at the docks^ with coal yards blazing and large ships burning, the lists of dead and wounded constantly lengthening, the frightfulness was increased when armored cars bearing British soldiers dashed into a crowd of 15.000 people attending a Gaelic football game. The field of the game quickly became a scene of carnage as a hurricane of bullets swept over the playing field, creating a panic among the spectators. Ten were killed and at least seventy were wounded. The game was between teams from Tipperary and Dublin. and play had only proceeded for IB minutes when the invasion by soldiers occurred. A well organized attack on former and present officers of the "Black and Tans" is reported in Dublin. Captain Newberry of the "Black and Tans" was shot dead at his residency. Twelve others, most of them former officers, also have been killed. Three men, named Thomas Smith, ' Maclean and Kaldow, were shot at a house on Morehampton road and two others were shot at the Gresham hotel. Another fight during a raid resulted in the deaths of two soldiers and one civilian. Several other persons were wounded. The Sinn Fein attacks were anticipated by the British authorities. It had been learned that the Irish republican leaders were planning a widespread reign of terror by shooting "Black and Tans.** The "Black and Tans" for some tine have been making their rounds in groups of four and five in anticipation of the attacks. Cork, Nov. 23.--This city Is in a state of panic, with man^ of the residents quitting the city and hastening Into the country in fear of further reprisals by the soldiery. The kidnaping of a detective as he was leaving a church was quickly followed by the shooting to death of a boy in broad daylight bf soldiers in a passing lorry. COL ALF TAYLOR liational Union Urges Natlonjfliide Holdup of All Product*., ' ^rom Farm* - M i SEE BILLION DOLLM LOSS For the second time since the Civil war Tennessee has elected a Republican to the governor's chair. Col. Alf Taylor of Nashville is the state's new governor-elect, having defeated hia Democratic opponent, Gov. Albert Roberts, by something over 20,000 votes. It was Colonel Taylor's second race for gubernatorial honors. Back In 1886 he ran against his brother Bob, a Democrat, and was badly beaten. U. S. WEEKLY MARKET REPORT BIG MAIL THEFT IS SOLVED •swan More Men Arrested in Connection With $3,500,000 Robbery --Loot Recovered. Csancil Bluffs. Ia^ NOT. 22.--Seven more arrests, one confession, the recovery of a large amount of money, all In $10 bills, and the discovery of an automobile have resulted In the Clearing up of the mystery surrounding the $3,900,000 mall car robbery in the local Tarda Saturday night. Two of the men, T. A. Daly and BL A. Reed, are whites, and the others an negroes. The money was recovered from the <Mcken house of the Daly home, following the confession of Reed. Reed rooms at the Daly home. The negroes arrested are member? the John Bell family and are held la connection with one mall suk not - 9H recovered. •P?'* « Hv * t'VVNew Portuguese Cabinet. * ' ilshon, Nov. 22.--A new Portuguese «aMnet has been formed by Alvaro Xavler de Castro, at present high commlssloner In Mozambique, who will act as premier and minister of the Jftterior. Potatoes and Applea Decline at Chi> eage--Wheat and Corn Lower-- Live Stock Also Down. WEEKLY MARKETGRAM. By U. S. Bureau of Markets. Washington, Nov. »».--Wees Knued November 16Lh, lftJ#.--KRU1T8 AND VKGETAHI. KS -- Northern potatoes atead) 1. o. b. at to per 1U) lbs. sacKed, with weak tone prevailing at the close. Carlou, Chicago, declined 10c to 15c, closing at il.Uu to $2. Joooing prices in othei midwestern markets steady at 12.16 tt Receipts ligut at western New York shipping points; round white stock bteadj at $2 to Vi.lu. shipments from Maine anc northern states decreasing. Apple receipt* falling off at western New York shipping points; A2ta Baldwins $4.26 per barrel Baldwins and Yorks steady In consuming markets, mostly at $4 Co $&. HAY AND FKEL>-- Hay market weak in East. Receipts more than ample tt take care of requirements In that section. Buyers reluctant to buy, because prevailing prices are still 100 per cent highet than before the war, while prices of leec and grain are gradually declining to prewar figures. Prices practically unchanged No. 1 timothy. New York, M0.50, Fhila., 131, Chicago, $34. GRAIN--Wheat markets displayed I steady tone and advancing tendency until the 17th, when .reported purchase ol three cargoes Canadian wheal weakenec confidence in prices and recessions set it on the 17th and 18th. Great weakness ic corn was additional influence. Floul stocks in hands of important bakers and all retailers small. Heavy stocks ol wheat at Fort William, Ont., cannot b« moved as farmer-owners are holding. Stocks of wheat sir all at American terminal markets. On the 16th, Decern be 1 corn closed at 70c. New low point since 1916. Caused by break of five to eight cents in Kansas City cash corn market*. Corn market under influence of new crop, Cash demand slow but prices are at bis /premiums over December future. New No. 2 white corn eight cents over December future on the 18th. Nos. 1 and 2 old mixed ten cents premiums, yellow thirteen cents, white eleven cents. For the week Chicago December wheat unchanged at 91-80%. December corn down 6%c, eloping at 70c. Minneapolis December wheat lost 4c, closing at $1.66%. Kansas City December down 6c at 11.72%. Winnipeg l^fec at <1.90. LIVE STOCK AND MEATS--Excessive runs and poor quality produced sharp declines in the cattle market during the week. Depreciation ranged 60c on yearling steers to (1.75 per 100 lbs, on western* and medium native beef steers. Cowa and heifers broke 75c to J12S. Fat ewes declined II. fat and feeding lambs averaged 50c down. Hogs lost about 80c pel 100 lbs. November 18 Chicago prices. Top hogs. 112.50. bulk 111.90 to $12.10; top yearling steers $17. good beef steers $14. R down, heifers $12.25, cows $10, feeder steers $10.50. westerns $11.75, veal calves $15, fat lambs $12, feeding lambs $12.50. ewes $6.26. With the exception of veal and pork loins the fresh meat markets were weak and lower. Beef and mutton averages tt tower, with lambs showing an extreme decline of $3 per cwt. Veal about 91 higher. Some weights on pork loins ranged 91 to $2 higher than a week ago. Ban Ordered on Selling Until Prices Reach "Profit-Making Levels"--Reduction of Production Threatened Unless Prices Are Adjusted. Kansas City, Mo., Nov. 20.--A nation' wide producers' strike to combat the falling prices of farm products was urged in a call sent out by the National Farmers' union to Its local unions throughout the country. The call, in the form of a resolution adopted at the national convention of the organization here, went forward to secretaries of local branches of the organization, which represent producers of grain, cotton, wool and live stock, said to number 800.000. The proposed strike was urged In retaliation for what the convention considered abnormal deflation In prices of farm products, through which it was asserted American farmera have been robbed of $1,000,000,000 X In reduced value of products now on hand. All farmers were appealed to to hold this year's production from the markets until "profit-making levels" were restored. The action of the National Farmers' union was In line with a "wheat strike" called several weeks ago by the Wheat Growers' Association of the United States. Delegates asserted a considerable quantity of this year's wheat crop was being held off the market. Reduction of production In the future was threatened "unless the pri<*es of our products are fairly readjusted to the end that we may obtain just returns for our labors and Investments" is another resolution approved by the convention. Officials of the organization pointed out that members were not under obligation to obey the terms of the strike, but expressed the belief that such a movement would be effective. A conference of representatives of all farmers' organizations of the country was called to meet In St. Louis December 16 to consider the creation of a national farm marketing board. Des Moines, la., Nov. 20.--A move» ment to restore the war finance corporation, with $1,000,000,000 capitalization, as a positive and immediate way of restoring grain prices, was inaugurated by the board of directors of the Des Moines chamber of commerce. ARMENIA ARMY French and British Envoys' Resoions Adopted by tite ^ ; ; ' Assembly. COUNT ON II. 1 TO HELP District Attorney Joseph C. Pelleiier of Boston, supreme advocate of the Knights of Columbus, has been appointed commander of the Order ot St. Uregory by Pope Benedict. Mr. Pel letter hud previously been knighted in the same order. INCOME TAX REPORT Shows Increase of $2,272,000,* 000 in 1918 Over 19tT« ; tils ^ Reds Capture American. London. Nov. 23.--Dispatches re- «tfved here from Berlin say that an Amerkan. Colonel Morell. was made a prisoner by the Bolshevik army during the rout of General Wrangel's army In Abe Crimea. 2,500 Tin Plate Men Idla. "Wheeling. VV. Va.. Nov. 23.--Indefinite suspension of work at the York- Vllle (O.) tin plate plant of the Wheeling Steel and Iron company is \ an- Ciced by officials of the concern U. S. THREAT TO THE W. U. Statement Says Company Refuaed to Accept 8tate Department Mea»' sages Unless Prepaid. Washington, Nov. 19.--A veiled threat that permits grunted for the ]anding of Western Union cables in the United States will be revoked unless the company continues to accord the American government the same privileges that it accords the British and other governments in handling cable messages Is contained In a formal statement Issued by the State department. The company, says the announcement, not only has refused to arapt any government cable messages without prepayment of tolls, but als»o has refused to carry at the reduced government rate messages originating outside of the United States. Pennsylvania Congressman Dies. Washington, Nov. 23.--Congressman Mahlon M. Garland of Pittsburgh, a Republican representative at large from Pennsylvania was found dead In the bathroom of his home heri. Death was due to heart disease. ,v 8hows Seventy-Four Fewer Million* aires in the Corresponding Time °f Tabulation* ' ?>(n. =< i Washington, Nov. 22^-D&$l4& ^hi loss of 74 members of the country'# million-a-year Income class, the taxa* bie Income of the Jnlted States increased In 1918 by over *2,272,000.0001 as compared with 1917, according ti the income statistics issued by th+ bureau of internal revenue. j Income reported for 1918 amounted to $15,924,639,355, against about $13,- 700,000,0110 in 1917, iltiiough 141 persons Hied returns for incomes of $1,- 000,000 or over in 1917 and only 67 in 1918. Rersonal re tarns filed during 1918 numbered 4,425,114 and the tax. both normal and surtax amounted to $1,- 127,721,835. The average tax for each individual was 254.85. As compared with i917, a growth of 952.234 was shown in the number of returns filed. Tiie Increase in the to tal tax was $434,228,881. LOWER PRICES AID BUSINESS HARDING URGES U. S. THRIFT President-Elect Suggests Plain Living for the Nation During Re- # adjustment Period. Mfcftr Orleans, Nor. 20.--"Neither otir nor the world's salvation Is to be worked out through any patent nostrum," President-elect. Warren O. Harding declared in a speech before the chamber of commerce here. In which he discussed the Industrial and economic situation. 'One hundred per cent production, minimized waste," and "rational > readjustment" offer the remedy for the industrial and economic ills of the United States, the president-elect said. After declaring that there has been "wild contemplation of earnings, whether in wages or dividends," Senator Harding made an appeal for the' "Ideal relationship where men may labor with a soul In their tasks" and for a realization oft "the dignity of productive labor." ALLIES' ARMY TO VILNA League of Nations Army Is "Officially Created at Geneva--Troops to Maintain Order. Geneva, fio. 18.--The League of Nations army was officially created Jby the political section of the league. i<Great Britain. France, Spain and Belglum have already notified the league that they will dispatch troops to VII* no to maintain order during tfhe plebiscite. The name of the commander of the expedition of the league army is withheld for the present. It Is expected that other nations will be Induced to send contingents to the force which the lobby gossip here credits with being the nucleus of real "league army." The chief significance of Hhe measure Is found In the fact that Spain, wh<^ kept out of the World war, has been dragged Into armed Intervention In suupport of numerous little expeditions .respiting from the war. Demand for Merchandiae Shows Mod- , erate Increase--Cotton Mllla Curtail Production. -•, t . '• 1 . Haw York, Nov, 22.-- Dun's Review of November 19, says: Certain changes for the better have appeared In business. The Improvement Is slight, and none at all Is visible in various quarters, but some of the Indications are more favorable than In recent weeks. While immediate commercial revival Is not expected, sounder conditions In the future are foreshadowed. Demand for seasonable goods has moderately increased, and offerings of merchandise at lower prices seems to hfe meeting With a somewhat broader response. A decline In October building permits does not mark a new development but the decrease--10.9 per cent--is larger than has been witnessed in recent months. Narrowing of the disproportion between the Rrices of independent steel companies and those of the leuiltng producer has continued. The demand nearly everywhere has receded. Signs of improvement in the leather trade have not l)een wholly lacking, and a better feeling has developed In the East from the fact that some large buyers have made inquiries. A little more activity has also appeared In the West. Development of a somewhat broader Inquiry and demand for dry goods appeared this week, though price concessions are still necessary to stimulate buying. With curtailment of cotton production at mill centers increas> ing steadily, less than 400,000 bale* of raw cotton were consumed In th's country last month. For the ulxth consecutive week bank clearings <jis close reductions from last year figures, this week's total of $7,976,830,- 036 as reported to Dun Review be ing 12 per cent, less than the corresponding period of 1919. The exhibit is again decidedly against this year, showing a loss of 17.0 per cent. FRENCH FIRE ON THE REDS Laves $100,000 tor Animals. New York. Nov. 20.--Bequests of $200,000 to the Actors' Fund of .America and $100,000 to the American jporiety for the Prevention of Cruelty So Animals are contained ta the will of Gen. Rush C. Hawkins. Soldier Killed Near Limerick, '.London, Nov. 20.--According to '?%*W8 which reached here, an attack on an aerodrome guard at Barwd- )More, near Limerick, was beaten off after one soldier was killed ami as* ptber seriously wounded. Reds Win Siberian Town. - Peking. Nov. 23.--The BolshevTkt have resumed their attacks against the antl-Bolsheviat forces in eastern Siberia and have captured Borgia, on the Trans-Siberian railway, 225 miles southeast of Chita. Convicted 8layer Is Hanged. Chicago, Nov. ^--Protesting his tonocence to the last, Arthur E. Haensel, overseas veteran and member of the American Legion, paid the penalty oo the gallows for having •»*>•» ftls wife. 100,000 Refugees. Constantinople. Nov. 22.--An order of the day issued by »Jen. Baron Wrangel of the Russian volunteer army estimates the number of refugees in Constantinople and vicinity at upward of 100.000, \ , Hawaii Nearly Half Jap. Washington, Nov. 18.--The Japanese population of Hawaii was announced by the census bureau at 109,260 out of a total population of 255,512. The Japanese constitute 42.7 per cent of the 1920 population of the island. Crows Attack Hunter. Biaux City, la., Nov. 22.--Attacked by thousands of crows while duck hunting on the Missouri river near here. M. L. Murray of Salix killed and wounded more than 600 of the angry birds In three hours. Mrs. Catt Sails for England. Hew York. Nov. 20.--Mrs. Carrfe, Chapman Catt. president of the National Woman's alliance, sailed fer England on the steamer Adriatic to attend a meeting of the alliance In London, beginning November 29. Mob Lynches Three Negroes. Douglas. Ga., Nov. 20.--Two negno men and one negro woman accused of implication In the killing of Pearly Harper, a young planter of this county, were shot by a mob of about 150 •tea who overpowered the sheriff. Warship 8hells Theodosia, East Crimea, When Bolsheviki Shoot at Ships Carrying Refugees. Constantinople, Nov. 23.--Theodosia, East Crimean, has tveen shplied by a French warship, following the firing by the Boishevlkl on French destroyera carrying refugees. r Senator Harding's Resolution Adopted by the Senate la Cited--Meana Appeal to 41 Nations of 1 .3:- • ^ V1* Uaguo.' - ;. V• J t Geneva, Nov. 24.--A resofa&Oii'presented by M. Vlvlani, inviting the council of the League of Nations to confer with the various powers with a view to constituting a force sufficient to put an end to hostilities in Armenia, which was joined to Lord Robert Cecil's resolution along the same lines, was adopted by the assembly of the league. Supporting Lord Robert Cecil's de? maud that the assembly appoint a committee to examine Into means for ending the hostilities between the Turkish nationalists and the Armenians, M. Spalekjovitcb of the Serbian delegates recalled the Unite*' States at one time had approved the use of the' American ' fleet to suqeor the Ar^ menians. It was recalled here in this connection that Senator Harding was the senator who reported the resolution. (A resolution requesting the president to send marines to B&ium was adopted by the senate May 13 last. It was oaered by 8enator Harumg on behalf of the foreign relations committee.) A, J. Balfour of Great Britain, speaking on the resolution, said that if the United States had been willing to take the mandate for Armenia, she bad the men, mopey and spirit to make her on ideal mandatory. The league lias been unable to accomplish anything with regard to the Armenian situation, Mr. Balfoar admitted, because the condition in Armenia, he argued* was not such as the ieugue was organized to deal with. Mr. Balfour said an appeal must be sent to the 41 states of the league for a united effort to save Armenia. Rene Vlvianl of France, following Mr. Balfour, said all were agreed that compassion would no longer suffice for Armenia. "It is not the fault of France if the league today is disarmed before the situation In Armenia is righted," said M. Vivianl. Virtually the entire assembly applauded this statement. It was notwl, however, that the British delegation did not applaud. 'If the conference had listened to France," continued M. Vlvianl,' "we would have bad an international stuff and an international force to deal with this situation." M. Vivianl presented a resolution inviting the council of the league to consult with the powers with a view to the constitution of a fqree sufficient to put an end to the hostilities in Armenia. Dr. Frldtjof Nansen of Norway estimated that 60,000 men would be a force sufficient to deal with the situation. He thought that If the assembly appealed to the whole world, the United States, although it had refused the mandate, would do its share. Delegate Jonescu of Rouiuania supported M. Vivlani's proposition, and also thought the United States -might be counted on for help. Thq debate gave the impression of everyone thinking of a resort to intervention and yet not wishing to call It by that name. C. J. Doherty of Canada put it as "an exceptional remedy for an exceptional situation." "At the close of tlie debate, however, Lord Cecil said he would favor armed Intervention or any other practical plan of dealing with the situation. ' M. Vlvlani proposed that a committee select one power that would accept tiitt responsibility of taking up negotiations. He carried almost the entire assembly with him in his eloquent peroration in which he demanded immediate action. Mr. Balfour wanted further light on the proposed negotiations. He asked what the French, delegation proposed to offer' Mustapha Keraal Pasha, the nationalist leader, as It was quite necessary, the British delegate said, to offer the nationalist leader ^lther money or territory. He thought It would be difficult to organize an expedition of 60,000 or 80,000 men. "Failure to take practical action here on this question," responded M. Vivianl, "will be to demonstrate tfll default of the League of Nations.** 3- ? • From the NEW ROYAL COOK BOOK Congressman Dies In Crash. /; Pomona, Cal., Nov. 23.--Congressman- elect Charles F. Vandewater, a Republican of Long Beach, Cal., and his secretary, Miss Jaminess Leuvln, were killed when the authomoblle In which they were riding struck a truck. Iceberg in Path of Liners. Boston, Nov. 24.--An Iceberg in the steamship track east of Newfoundland was reported by a wireless dispatclk. The appearance of Ice in midatlantlc «t this season is unusual. f >•<?,•; Angel cake that fairly melts tn your mouth. Instea'd of eight .eggs it CM be made with thrtc and the- yolks of the* eggs can be used for i &anl Sonshine cake. Angel Cal* 1 eop sugar M cups Hottr , - li teaspoon cream eff tartar • "*.• $ teaspoons RojrsX Baking Powder H teaspoon salt % cup scalded milk I teaspoon almond or vanilla extr&st • whites of 3 egxa Mix and sift first five Ingredients four times. Add milk very slowly, while still hot beating continually; add vanilla; mix well and fold In whites of eggs beaten until light. Turn into ungreased angel cake tin and bake in very slow oven about 46 minutes. Remove from oven; invert pan and allow to atand until cold. Cover top and sides with either White or chocolate icing. Sunshine Cake «tablespoons shortening % eup sugar yolks of 3 eggs . 1 teaspoon uvorHv extract Heupmlik Itt cups flour I teaspoons Royal Bak- v ing Powder Cream shortening; add* sugar gradually, and yolks of eggs which have been beaten until thick; add flavoring; sift together flour and baking powder and add alternately. a little at a time, with the milk to first mixture. Bake In greased loaf pan tn moderate oven S to 46 minutes. Cover with white icing. / "J _ jr "i ^ BAKING POWDER * Vf •* * S -v'„ I1- ^ * * Made from Croam of Tapfaiy derived freat gypsa. ^ ^ - -la. • "VC v, v*". FREE By all means get the new Royal Cook Book -- Just cut. Contains these and MO other delightful, helpful recipes. Free for tne asking. Write TODAT to BOY AL BAKING POWDER OO. IV FttHoD Streak Haw York Ohf THIS BOOKKEEPER LOST OUT PECULIAR TYPE OF ORATOlf Might Have Known That Request for Raise in Salary Would Not Give ' Boss Satisfaction. A labor leader wia defending strikes. "How could men get better pay without striking for it?" he said to a New York reporter. "By asking for it, do you think? MI once knew a young bookkeeper who went to his boss and asked for a dollar raise. The boss flew Into a terrible passion. "'But,' faltered the bookkeepr, there Is nothing unreasonable, sir, in my request. Don't you remember promising me a raise after I'd beeu with you a year?' "'Yes.' hissed the boas, *bnt don't yon remember that 1 made this raise conditional on your giving me every satisfaction?* •"Oh, dear I Haven't I satisfied yon, sir?* said the yonng bookkeeper, pitifully. M 'Satisfied me?* yelled the boss, 'da yon think yon are satisfying me when yoa ask me for a raised": . < All Set. ' "At the psychological moment well Introduce the letters," said the fair plaintiffs lawyer. "Are they tied with pink ribbons?" asked his fellow counseL "Sure." "And tear-stained?" "I sprinkled them mystfC* "All right; they'll do." What They Needed. Owning a car these days tut tho happiest of things, At any rate, so the man told ua He was standing where many cars passed. And he dropped a card Into each car. The card read, "We buy for Immediate cash, diamonds, Jewelry and precious stones." We asked why he'dlst rlbuted the cards to automobile owners. "Because they need money to run their cars. That'a my experience.'*--New York Qlobe. Margin Net Large. Little Hock, Ark., Nov. 38.-- l»raor Cox received a majority of only 41,101 votes out of 188,059 cast at the November election tn Arkansas, according to an official compilation at the office of the secretary of state. British M. P. Gets Six Months. London, Nov. 22.--Lieut. Col. L'Rstrange Malnne, liberal member of the house of commons, who was arrested In Dublin November *0 for alleged seditious dtterances, was sentenced to six months' imprisonment. 500 Ruaa to Be Deported. Washington, Nov. 22.--More than 900 Russian radicals remain to be deport ed. It was said at t5.« department of labor. All except forty of these are at liberty on ball, bpt the others are held In confinement at Dear Island- :< Soviet Gathers Huge Armid^v ' % Warsaw, Nov. 24.--Great soviet armies are being gathered to crush General Balakovitch, commander of "Irregular" forces which have been operating east of the armistice Bone between Poland and Russia prog)£r. •on of Anna GoAld to Wed, Paris, Nov. 24.--Announcement Is made of the engagement of Count de Castellane, son of Count Bonl de Castellane, and Mile. Paternotre, daughter of Jules Paternotre, formerly French ambassador to the United States. Fist Fight In Commons. London, Nov. 24.--Two members of the house of commons .came to blows during the question period with the Irish situation under discussion. They were Joseph Devlin, nationalist, and MaJ. John Mqlson, unionist Irish to Invade England. ' London, Nov. 24.--Sir Hamar Greenwood, chief secretary for Ireland, declared in the house of commons that plans of "paid assassins," discovered recently. Included destruction ef. Hie tod property in England. , > He Might Fill the Bill. Boy--Yon have a vacancy for a I believe, sir? Employer--Yes; bat I tell you at once he must be a boy who never tells a lie. never swears, and never gives a discourteous answer. Boy--I'll send my cousin, sir.. He's deaf and dumb. A drunken man may soon ha taada to da nee.--Danish -proverb. Small Wonder That in Thle Bomba«tN» Age He Created Something of a Sensation. - The speaker, of the occasion wa» «C such unusual appearance that the aadience gasped or giggled, according to1 the preference of Its members, when be came upon the rostrum. "Ladies and gentlemen,** he harsher be?an, "poverty would be abolished In this country if we could only save and devote to some useful purpose the time we waste in listening to Hons., Chautauqua lecturers, pointers with prfda and viewers with alarm, singers who cannot sing, babbling bards, parents of bright children, bearers of messages to the waiting world, and sundry other bores whom it is not neces» sary to mention at this time." And peculiar as was his personal appearance, his procedure was mora unique, for, having said bis say, ha bowed »grlmly and retired from tha rostrum.--Kansas City Star.. ' w "i - Odious Comparison^ - The particular stretch of roaa wdiT probably worse than any other in all France, If such a thing were possible, and the weary and footsore company was of one mind concerning It. Private Red Long, at one of the Infrequent rests, turned disgustedly to h)s buddy and asked: "Say, Jack, what's that road that's paved Will} good Intentions?" ."Road to hell," replied the otherf. "Well," said Private Long, "aHuf gottaVsay Is that even that has got thla licked a mile."--The American Legion Weekly. Policeman Polite, With Motlva. The policeman approached the park lounger and requested the loan oi a small sheet of paper. "Certainly," said the lounger, and torq a page out of his notebook. "And could you also lend me a pencil?" asked the policeman politely. "Yes. I think so," replied the lounger, fumbling in his pocket. "That's very good of you," said thh policeman. "And now, please give KM your name and addrtss, for I saw you stealing flowers a few moments ago," --Pittsburgh Chronicle-Telegraph. Sometimes the girl helps her baab* ful lover out, and sometimes it Is her father. ' > A barking dog was never • hunter.--Portuguese proverb. Coffee is often the Ridden cause aPmany ills and discomforts 4 "Shat is because it; contains . certain elements which aii? , - injurious to many people. ; IF coffee disturbs youJf.;: v" health, change to K I ?:i , f1 This pure cereal drink is healtnful and wholesome; has a delightful coffee-like flavor, but contains none of coffee's harmful elements * SoJd by all grocer# Costs less than coffee MadUV^R»«tumCereal Co,Inn. Battle CreffV.Mlrh