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«. V,"'M5*»*, t,« \ ,jt * », ~ *«,' • ->. *- " '" -•' .--*«*" **-*, yif - 6. »~ r»*H jui.: b* '--*: ""',*1-, *- £ \ 1 4 r * " ^ . > * - C „ . s < W j**". * + *:A ft. - *•»-•'.* ..-^ ^ > » -- A"" • >/„ .' ^ o,\. •' , ^ » ; *U< , i: '.: - . .ftt , ^ .V - •* * » "*"•' "" • • ™iriM •-*»•.'v-*.n-• «iiii* . Iflfnii1 • •" •!Iiiin* r '.f. £ £L*J£ + ". ..-\ , ,^^vr*.ik^?*^'v P4 "t I : *-**%)$? *" 4 J ' * ,*> >v,**v ;/ ^-- ^1 . - •-'1 ••" > . „ ,• ""' :'A "*•". 1: .„^is ., . -- ' , *-'**, ~ gr 'W ^ a""5 ,-', j^r *"• > "^'KiV:-.':" ' ""-'te- •<--.,/»'v v*£Tr.- ^;":i ^-.-*- >• >w>A Wv* • &4?W ^ TnJ "V *-<A?' *<• ; ' «:St 'J VOLUME TWO Published III me Interest of the McHenry Community High School, McHenry, Illinois, Thursday, November 6, 1924 EDITORIAL STAFF Editor in Chief ."Richard Stenger Assistant Editor. Frank Page Sewing ...-,.,. .~T...; Elizabeth Boger Athletics . r. .. * . . Adrian Thomas Science .. % *. J§ v^\^... Adele Pufahl •;'Z$pv. Q>mmercikl Senior .... Junior ..... Sophomorift' .... » Freshman..»... Girls' Athletics.. Haptor .......«. Literary Cooking <.*.£•. '. Music .. . iitsonals ....... .Ida Reynolds . ¥;»v.. .William Nye ,»« *£atherine Walsh i. John Fay ...George Stenger ....^,... .Lillian Buss . Albin Anderson ...itarjorie Whiting Elizabeth Vogt .. .Vary McAndrews ....Berteel Spencer A WORD FROM THE GftEAT Out of the failures of this generation comes the wisdom of the next. N .7 ' ' - ATHLETICS ' McHenry eleven twenty miles last Saturday only to meet defeat at the hands (or rather the feet) of the Dundee eleven to the tone of 40 to 0. The McHenry boys never played 'such a terrible game before and they certainly deserved to lose. The line wouldn't hold, the back field fumbled the ball and the wind blew. "Stubby" Dahn, Dundee's full back: was the star performer of the game. Newman, Thomas, Whiting and Krause again made most of the gains for McHenry. The strong wind prevented Thomas from using his aerial Attack to good advantage, altho a few short passes were completed. During almost every game the passes from Thomas have been responsibly for one or more touch downs. The work of the two Conways, Carr, Page, Zuelsdorf, Miller and Stilling will not be forgotten by the Dundee boys for some time. Next Saturday the McHenry eleven will entertain the heavy Antioch team. This will be the last game of the season so come out and see the home Eleven end up a partly successful season with a great victory. Don't forget the McHenry-Antioch game, Saturday, Nov. 8, at the new community high school .Gam? starts promptly at 2:30. v -y" ?z : Wednesday afternoon the McHenry team went to Crystal Lake for a scrimmage'in preparation- for next Saturday's game. The new gym is now practically completed and the boys are _ all anxious to get the basket ball team organized. Mr. Stringer has not quite completed his schedule,-but he has at present fourteen games scheduled. The complete schedule -wiUr^M| #ublished later. «sset. It puts ft whistle on the lips, tobasco in the blood, cement in the backbone and spunk thruout the homo. Got your nerve with you today? Yes? Youll win! And when you've logt your nerve yqu'p .through^„ W-< - ' ' * , ' :" N . G * * : . ' ' - j t • • » 1 '> • : " SENIOR CLASS NOTES ^ Late news report: William Nye returned to school Tuesday morning. Oh --. ain't it a grand anfl glorious feeling? Some of the teachers think that reviewing is just as waste of time. Do we students think the same? I'll say we do not. Mr. Koerner yas absent from Glee dub last Wednesday evening: He said a chicken supper was the cause of it all. Can you blame him? Ted Miller was seen standing near the refreshment stand with his arms around two girls at once. The long arms that go with height certainly have their advantages. But if Ted keeps on growing where is it all, going to end"? Most of the sophomores' showed splendid ability to co-operate, but special thanks is due Jacob Bylsma, Bernard Freund, Byron Hitchens, George Reynolds, Theodore Miller and Earl Conway. Elmer Freund, Leo Herbes, Raymond Baer and Clarence Clemens not only worked before the party, but helped clean up afterwards. In fact, Sunday morning the janitor didn't know there had been a party. FRESHMAN CLASS NOTES ; "Anyway we give the sophomores William Nye was absent from school J credit for the good time they gave us last Monday and it seems that a certain post graduate was somewhat quiet and thoughtful on the same day. We wonder why ? It seems that the senior class is quite well represented every Wednesday night at Woodstock. They seem to like the back row in Hie balcony about the best in the house. Mr. Beth is receiving the congratu-j Stringer's place la4ions of most of the senior class.for; afternoon. Saturday night. * Howard Ensign did not show hunself at the party the other night. We suppose he pot cold feet. Edward Michels said that somebody was pretty handy with the plank while he was being initiated. We discovered that Earl Dowell is a pretty good teacher for he took Mr. for awhile Monday ' NERVE . "Nerve is not a virtue. It is merely a modern label on old goods. For nerve existed before David went out of his class to meet Goliath and got the decision and the moving picture royalties. Our* forefathers called "it pluck. But nerve is pluck raised to the nth power nor is it a single virtue. It is a multiplex. It takes a big tape measure to encircle the word nerve. Its meaning is so diverse, its manifestations are so many. It is the biggest word in the students' lexicon and the key to any great success. Nerve is no unit virtue. It is the amalgamation of many. In its composition are self confi<Jence> courage, energy, grit, hope, enthusiasm, ambition, endurance--and then a surplus. A student with nerve may perforce be accused of conceit, mostly by the envious and one cylinder brained who are unable to distinguish between conceit and confidence. Conceit is "I" in speech; self confidence is "I" in deed. Nerve makes a stucfent sure of himeelf. It destroys hesitation and takes the wobble out of his mind and legB. A student with nerve believes in himself. He knows that he can accomplish the most difficult of tasks. Doubt and timidity are strangers to him. Nerve begets courage. It puts fear on the scoot and its the stuff of which heroes are made. It-goads men to dare and do what is just and fair. Nerve supplies energy. The efllow with nerve does not droop or sag in the middle. His head is high; his chin up; his shoulders are square and his back is straight and his action is as brisk as his brain. Nerve shows in the students' walk and conversation. Neither his foot nor tongue falters. He walks with an accent and talks with emphasis. He uses a chair chiefly as a step ladder to reach higher. A student with nerve a smiling, whistling optomist. He jnalrs hope. He doesn't know lasiness and carelessness 'and would decline an introduction. His enthusiasm is as infectious as(the laugh of merry childhood. WateVer his task, he is a winner. He thinks so--works and makes ii so. Furthermore, he lasts. He has en* darance. Discouragements may beset, obstacles may arise* croakers may his theme writing. He seems to be quite proficient in discussing politics, altho his party changes to oppose the party of his opposer in the argument. A certain teacher was trying to impress upon his students' minds just what direction a horizontal wind blows in. Failing in his other illustrations he bur'st out, "Horizontal wind, a wind that blows back and forth along the horizon." The seniors wish to take this method of congratulating the sophs upon their successful Hallowe'en party which was given last Saturday night in the new high school gym. It certainly was a good beginning for the entertainments in the new high school. Examinations for this quarter will occur next Thursday and Friday. There will be a slight conflict on Friday as the state teachers' examinations are to be given at Woodstock on Nov. 8. This will probably be remedied by changing the date of the senior exams in this school. JUNIOR CLASS NOTES . When George Reynolds sings * regular scream. We are very sorry that a window was accidentally broken at the Hallowe'en party. Everybody was happy to have a little vacation Friday. How about the teachers, we hope that they enjoyed themselves. Evidently Marie Baer doesn't like company fer when Miss O'Sullivan gave us our daily lesson in etiquette it happened to be on response to invitations. She said, "When anyone asks you to stay two weeks, stay a shorter length of time for that is evidently the limit. Marie: "111 say so." The gymnasium and auditorium are practically finished. The latter is being decorated and the floor of the gym is all marked off for games. (The freshmen thought that these were Hallowe'en decorations). The baskets are here and we are all looking forward for a fine basket ball season. Exams are at hand, the first ones coming Thursday, each taking one hour and twenty minutes. The object is not to terrorize the students, but for three primary reasons: Firstly, to make the student study; secondly, to cover quickly the work that has been taken up in order to get a general idea; and thirdly, to clear up questions which have not been understood. Most teachers seem to agree that the grades are not fair, therefore they must be considered only in Comparison with the daily grades. Too many 'students try to "cr§m" and anything learned that way is nfct properly absorbed. Students who do not recite easily can save themselves by writing a good examination. Altho teachers do not like to- give them and students do not like to take them, thinking of them only as a necessary evil, we know th^t a student, after having prepared a gqpd exam, is better for it. Some more favorite sayings:-- Mr. Tallmadge--"It sounds reasonable, but why?" Miss Oates--"If you cant get that I'll give you aome more." Miss Miller--"That reminds me of a story." Miss O'Sullivaft--"Live in a house seven years before you poke the fire.' Mr. Koerner--"Wasamatter here?" Mr. Duker--"Boys, please." Miss Stockebrand--"Alright." SOPHOMORE CLASS NOTES The initiation committee hands it to Ethel Whiting. She's the best sports-' man in the freshman class. We wish to thank the teache for their kind help and co-operation, without which our party would not have been a success. The much advertised Duncan sisters, represented by Ruth Whiting and Dorquit, but he sticks, he stays, he fights,; othy MarshaU, failed to appear, he triumphs. Why? Because he has! What was the trouble, girls? Stamina. Nerve wins the long race! The entertainment and initiation hard struggle. Any trainer of committees wish to thank Mr. Tallathletics will certify that nerve has j madge for the help and assistance he won more championships than speed' pave us toward making our party a The freshmen weren't the only ones that got messed up the other night. The ones that initiated us also had a hard time cleaning up. James Frisby said he liked the angle worms they fed him at the initiation Saturday. However, it happened t^be spaghetti. in the line and was taken for a fresh man. After being searched the Sophs, as well as the rest of the crowd, were amazed to see that William had 6 apples and 9 doughnuts concealed about his person. It appears that he is a very tender hearted lad, and that the sight of such an abundance of food was too much for him--so he couldnt resist taking some home to Nellie, the dog. Then, much to our sorroW, we all said "goodnight," and thus the delightful evening ended. We would like to thank the Sophomores, and those who assisted in mak ing the party a success, very orach for a most enjoyable evening. THE COUNTY FAIR When the guests of the sophomore class arrived at the party Saturday night, they found a county fair awaiting them. The majority took the paper money given them at the door and proceeded to the whistle pavilion where each was sold a whistle or horn for 25 cents in fair money. One hundred and twenty-five whistles and horns were distributed. Henry Schmidtt operated a dancing devil, a huge skeleton, in the dim red light. There was great excitement in Clarence Clemens' "Girls Only" booth, for a beautiful photo, handsomely bound, of Mr. Stringer was displayed. The girls are still wondering what Miss Jepson had in the "Men Only tent. A stilt race created considerable enthusiasm among the boys because bars of chocolate candy were We noticed some of the" freshmen'awarded the most agile. Byron were uneasy in their seats Monday Hitchens secured regular race-track morning. It must have been from: enthusiasm with the pig race. Dor- <or. brawn. Nerve, the greatest human j success. the hard blows the sophomores dealt. Teacher: "What is the first important thing for taking down notes? Earl, answering hastily: "A pencil and paper." Teacher: "How should we start a composition?" e Edward, misunderstanding: "At the beginning." Too bad -that no one was near and ready to assist when Lillian Smith decided to faint Saturday night while she was being initiated. Next time give us warning, Lillian, and we'll see that George, at least, gets behind you. THE SOPH'S HALLOWE'EN HOP On Saturday evening, Nov. 1, 1924. the Sophomore class of *27, gave to the teachers and students of M. C. H. S. one of the most successful and delightful parties ever held in the school. Everyone was supposed to come masked, but unfortunately all the stores sold'out of same, so'it proved to be about 50-50. At 8" o'clock, the first floor corridor was a general scene of excitement. Class rooms were used as booths in which the "Tall Gentleman," the County Fair, the Fortune Teller, the Art Gallery, the Men Only booth and the various other amusements were held. Attractive favors, consisting of horns and whistles were distributed and-- very much noise was made by all. Anna Pop was so-o-o frightened that she resorted to drastic measures by trying to hide in her locker, but was rather unsuccessful--that is to say-- the sophs caught her just fn time. We can't quite get the inside dope of just how they did initiate the Freshmen, but some of them looked pretty fagged out. One fellow's hair was white. Don't know whether it was just powder, or whether it changed color from fright. Another gentleman lost a most essential part of his costume, but after using a few "safeties" he seemed to be more collected than he had been previously. After everything that was to be seen was seen by everyone, we were escorted down to the gym, which was beautifully and artistically decorated with leaves, corn husks and pumpkins. A huge bon-fire on the football field could be seen from the gyp), and together with the decorations gave a very pleasing Hallowe'en effect. Then we danced to the music furnished by Schoewer dnd his orchestra and we would like to say, that although they did not play any length of time, we certainly enjoyed the ITWIsjc while it lasted. . . * • Last but not least, came the refreshments. Hellowe'en cider, homemade doughnuts and Johnsburg apples were served. Just about this tune, someone overheard a conversation between Miss Miller and Clyde Carr, and each seemed to be confessing to the other, that neither she nor he had partaken of a morsel of food since 12 o'clock that day. We take from that, that they forgot it was not to be a banquet. While we were eating and dancing, a young man with nice browiT eyes, and a rather "professional manner," kept walking by the refreshment booth continually. Upon inquiry I learned that his first name was William, and he was a senior and a doctor's son. Well, a little later in the evening when the orchestra had finished playing "Home Sweet Home," and everyone was thanking everyone else for the good time he had had, the Sophs were lining up the Freshmen in order to search them, so as to see whether or not they were trying to escape with any of the Soph property. Now it seems that this William got mixed up othy Peet furnished the two pigs. Miss Bacon had charge of the art gal lery, whose chief attraction was the ashes of Rome. A large sign over the door announced the Siamese Twins Jacob Bylsma told us thru his megaphone to "step right this way.' Jacob had the tallest man in captivity within. He was a tall freshies, firmly bound with a long rope an inch in diameter. The roulette wheel in Monte Carlo spun around thruout the evening, for the Prince of Monte Carlo, Bernard Freund, awarded nut and chocolate bars to the lucky followers of the sport. Several big bags of marshmallows were roasted at an immense bonfire during the dancing. Everybody seemed to have enough marshmallows except Clyde Carr. Clyde wanted to roast the two pigs next. At eleven-thirty the party closed up and everyone said that he had hact a good time. THE INITIATION *I1» freshmen were lined «p oil the outside of one of the rooms. When they were brought in one at a time they were blindfolded. One of the boys stood at the door with two electric wires on his hand. The first thing that the freshies had to do was to shake hands with the boy and in this way they received a shock by taking hold of the electric wires. They were then led around in the room by the sophomores and were given the rest of their initiation. Flour was put on their heads and rubbed in. They were then led to a sink filled with water and in which some apples were floating. They were told to feel with their hands where the apple was and then reach for it with their mouth. While reaching for the apple with their mouth their faces were pushed into the water, just far enough to get them wet. We had a dish of macaroni which was cooked. We told the freshies that these were angle worms and made them eat them. SCIENCE A physics student's aim: To enough apparatus to work with. Mr. Tallmadge (biology): "Where do all the fleas go?" Student: "Search me." Some of the zoo. students the course because so much drawing is required. They think that a good drawing ought to be like a book written by a modern writer, you can start at either end, but get the same meaning out of it. Students have rearranged the green house and added a number of new plants. John Wilson has been given full charge of it. So far most of the plants are for ornamentation, but in the future plants that are for study will be added. ' Mrs. Smith has loaned us a pineapple plant for the winter. We are glad to have the plant since few people are familiar with it. The science classes have started viewing for the exams which are Thursday and Friday. This week means review in general science. Instead of worrying about what we ought to remember, let's worry about what we have so successways talking with Bemie and Earl? It must be that she wants them to take sewing. It would be a wise plan for us sewing girls to study our lesson or we will be having a written quiz every day. We sure pity poor Marion. Every time she goes to the machine to sew it doe^ft't act the way it should. What caused Martha M. to laugh so hard the other day that she was sent out of class ? It must be because she sat on a pin. COOKING, - Tapioca Hki classed as a cereal, altho it is usually considered a dessert. Tapioca pudding was prepared by boiling the tapioca and then baking with apples. A lemon sauce was put over the pudding. Cream of wheat is the first of a group of cereals to be studied. The cereal was cooked and then raisins or dates were added. Cereals contain a larger amount of carbohydrate than any other foods. Carbohydrate is compounded of suger, starch and cellulose. The fruit contains iron, so this is added nourishment. Rice was boiled and then served with a cheese sauce. So that the nourishment of the rice, that goes into the water drained off of the rice, might be saved, part of this water was used in the cheese-sauce. Breakfast foods come under two classes, the prepared and the unprepared cereals. While the prepared breakfast foods cost more than the unprepared, the latter contains the largest number of calories. PAPER NUMBEI »">! 'am"iff SEVEN MUSIC Music is the incense on which the prayers of men are wafted up to heaven. There are two of the teachers playingjn the band. Hence we get notes of the band. Mr. Sears scratched his head and said: "Oh, be still, we sound like a bushel of nuts." • The music for the Hallowe'en party was furnished by Messrs. Schoewer, Barbian and Stilling. Our orchestra went to Crystal Lake Tuesday evening to practice with their orchestra in preparation for the program to be given early in December. Last Thursday evening in band practice Mr. Sears, intending to say the next piece would be "Bowl of Pansies," misspoke himself -and said "Basket of Roses." Someone corrected him and Mr. Popp, who wasn't paying attention, said, "Who mentioned 'Basket of Sandwiches?' " Boys' Glee club met last Wednesday night, but no director. Take courage, boys, Hallowe'en feeds are about over. "Tilly" Patzke really sang with us again on Monday morning. He's been present each time in body, but his spirit seemed to have vanished. The disease is seriously contageous. A good preventative and anecdote is found in nine hours' sleep the night before. Try it. The second bass section of the club are cultivating their voices in the regions of the fathomless deep% while the first tenor boys are twittering on loftier plains. The second tenors have located themselves in a rather middle ground, while our first bass section is all blossomed out in a garb of melody. Yes, part singing is the art in its most bountiful completeness. The boys realize this and are doing their best to make us appreciate the best in music. There is one more type of "student. This is a really rare specimen. Let's see--Oh yes, see that youth with lowered head and intent air? That young man, if you please, is--studying! - * MRS. FRISBY ENTERTAINS It was on the Wednesday night before Hallowe'en that a party of eight gathered at the home of Mrs. Bridget Frisby on John street to celebrate that mysterious occasioif which occurs but once every year. Miss Miller deserves the credit for organizing of this little party. She sought to entertain those who are members of the "family" a& this place. By chance, some of these were fellow faculty members of hers in this community. Music and games proved to. be the opening pastimes, frequently punctuated by those childish pranks without which no Hallowe'en party is complete. After their enthuiasm had ebbed the guests were escorted into the dining room, which had been beautifully decorated for the occasion by the original Miss Miller. It was here that the cunning place cards were found that contained each one's fortune, which had been foretold by someone's supposedly superhuman wisdom. And now came the big act on the program, a chicken dinner was served to them- It must have been delicious as Mr. Koerner was absent from Boys' Glee club in order to be present at this dinner. They were told that the din ner wasn't supposed to go to waste so each one let his conscience be his guide and promptly disposed of his share. After the meal was oyer the party adjourned and those present left for their various places of abode. Among those in the party who belong to the faculty that left with well filled stomachs were Miss Miller, Mrs. {fovea, Miss Kinney and Mr. Kwrnw teeth A- -31 Just tickle him to death. , , |- Miss Oates: "Is Baltimore tbe'iiatt stop?" J, Porter: "Yea, *mam, brash you ' v. "mam?" Miss Oa|w: "No, HI get off M seif." - '.jTj Miss Miller: "Leave the room." ' ^ Carl Thorse}!: "I was going i»-, take it with me." :-M> Marie B.: "I wants dress te pal' on around the house." New clerk: "How large is your ^ house, madam?" • ^ So far as we can see, the only dSf- ~ ference between Violet Vycital chewing gum and a cow chewing her cud fs that "the cow looks thoughtful.vi-K^' EXCHANGE COLUMN" We see by the Hebron "Tattler that the athletic department of the school is going to give a minstrel play on Nov. 6 and 7. At the inter-class track meet at Hebron Ralph Prouty of the seniors was high man for the afternoon with a total of twenty-three points. As Hebron hasn't a foot ball team, they are taking up track and tennis as the main athletics this fall. The teachers of Hebron have offered a prize for the student receiving the highest average in his or her studies and also for the boy who receives the athletic record tor four years. The Charge of the Robbed Brigade --1-- " Bobbed hair to the right of us, Bo" air to the left of us, \ . air behind us, i asundered. Ime with a heavy crop, . Some with a light mop, Into the barber shop, * Walked the bobbed htuidbwi. --2-- Women of high degree, Women past fifty-three, .Determined that they shall be ^ One of the numbered. w--' Women of every class, Mother and little lass, Flappers all join the nuns* Of the bobbed hundred. Some with bangs, some without* Some shingled round abotft, ' Some in curls, some in doubt, Fear they have blundered. Some of them look real swell, Sopie Qf them look like --well, Just as well not to tell. On the bobbed hundred. THE STUDY HA1& A sea of atudious heads, dota of color here and there, a drowsy hum and rustle of restless students--that is STUDENT EDITORIAL • A Word on Exams Exams are here for the first timtf this term and many of us will be sitting up until late hours just so that well know a little something. Advice given by people is, "Don't cram before exams," but if a person doesnt know anything, with what is he going to fill the paper? When the review is finished one finds out how little he knows. A review is the only thing that will "revive the struggling thoughts," but this also has to be done in a proper way. No one person can expect to sit down and absorb hundreds of pages in one night, but by reading the things which are faintest in the mind one can gain some knowledge. What you review "do well" and with the gained knowledge an average paper can be written. fully forgotten. Examinations are what a stranger makes of the study near, it's too late to learn a great deal, hall. Types abound in the study hall. but it's expedient to brush up and recall. Don't review solely for the sake of exams, but rather review for the time when you'll be thru with the course and your high school work. Then you ^nll appreciate your knowledge moet. SEWING „ Why la it Miss Stockehrud is al- Here is a girl searching in her vanity case, "looking for local color." Near by a boy. is burying himself in a Dick Turpin melodrama. Just in front of this "literateur" slouches a sluggish senior, head tilted back, lips moving, he is counting the electric lights. The teacher sits at her desk with piercing eyes, which see every stove. PERSONALS "Limburger" is the name of a German air. Bill Beth broadcasting: A stiff punch will knock any fighter out if he drinks enough of it. To the Editors of the M. .C. H. S. We editors may dig and think. Until our finger tips are sore. But some poor saphead's going to •ay, I've heard that joke before.. Tillie Patzke was stung in his career, he took care of bees. * -- Howard Ensign has introduced a bill in the senate asking that fish be provided with bathing suits. Pet sayings:-- George Reynolds: Every bons in my body aches. Lillian Bauer: Oh, wont you let me give you some headache tablets? Miss Stockebrand: Come here and look at these scissors I found. Marion Wegener: You are awfully cut up over it, aren't you Martha Miller: I get as many as twenty phone calls I day. ^ Adeline: Wrong numbers, I suppose. " S_ j IN COMMERCIAL CLASS/ Paul Patzke: Why ' wont these women let me alone? POETS'CORNER * * We are always disappointed when we find that we have been taught to / believe a thing which is not true. Wa always thought of Captain Smith as A ' • * fine specimen of a hero, with nicti^ shiny buttons, a black beard aad a 'Jfl simple, sincere heart The following poem, however, con- . * vinces us that he wasn't that kind of a hero at all. Miss Oates assures us that the tale here told is accurate in ev^lf-.*'-..^ detail: True Story of Captain Smith ' ^ There was anger round the camp fit*'. *<- of the chieftain Powahtan, In the midst of angry faces sat a Vail '*3 Dyke bearded man. vf: | Capta'n Smith, let's introduce hia^ leader of the Jamestown crowd, ; S ; Who sat smoking by the bonfire, by ^. the savage scowls uncowed. , " He had talked the tribes men sim^'-V?". telling them of trips afar, . How he tied three Turks in bow knots ' in a European war; How he had a harem beauty fall hi ^ love with him and such: , "Ugh," remarked a painted savage^ "Pale face captain talk too much." Hours passed and evening shadows v . round the camp began to creep, ' 1 \ Indians ^rere widely yawning, some "* "them were talked asleep, 1 % And the pale face still was talki^ />". when arose old Powahtan: "Hully gee!" he said, "Let's kill him; v let us kill while we can." i "Six weeks has he been among us, Ut . alone the voice we've heard; v None of us, not one, my brotheM^;' *' ;s. could edge in a single word." Then they bound the captain firm$F' and the club was raised on high, He was talking like greased lightning for the time had come to die. Then as comes a soft nosed bulla! from an army rifle sent, "T Came the sweet little Pocahantas witjh " a war whoop from her tent. ' * 5* Do not kill him," then she pleaded^ "Do not knock his block off, pa. Do not lift your angry mit and swat ;; him in the jaw; Cut his bonds and send him homeward' where his own pale faces walk, We can clean the whole bunch out l||f letting him go back to them ant'. . talk." v -'J •'Words of wisdom," cried the chief- ^ tain, "brothers, he maj be of use, Cut his bond and send him kitting hurry up and turn him loose." ^ . ~ if Then the liberated captain thru thf#; ' forest trail was sent, To the unsuspecting Jamestowl^ - ' briskly talking as he went. Ameft. • • „4, K|P .. HUMOR Wa shouldn't say it, but wa if there is a bark to, a dog** tree. The yellow peril was once believed to be due to the Mongal races. Now it seems to be the taxi races. We wonder if, are permanent You can wander in United States, but you must go to Italy to Rome. "Pat, I am sending your waistcoat} to save weight I have cut all the buttons off. Your loving mother." p. S.--You will find the buttons la your upper left pocket. "Have you lived hare all your "No, not yet." Teacher: "In what year of his Uti did Shakespeare die?" Student: "In his last year." ' YoU: "The dollar you lent Be !a(t"; week was bad." Him: "You said you wanted it bad£*': Judge: "I sentence you to be hungf' by the neck until you are dead." Prisoner: "Aw, go QSL iH h# youte just stringin' ma/* He: "Shtf has apse peculiarly dis^ tinctrve." v She: "How so?" ' He: "Sin's croes-eyed." v DUMBBELL POEMS How to Kill an Oyster Dont drown him deep in vinefpr Or season him at all; Don't cover up his shining forth With pepper like a palL But gently lift him from his shell And firmly hold your breath, Then with your eager tongue aa Teacher: "What do you think Caesar would be doing if he were living today?" on the old a^a Albin Anderson. Student: ^Living pension." Basket socials are now in ordstw Let Auctioneer Was. & Schreiher sell ^ your baskets. Oftce phcsM tt-B, Jj Henry, HL v. '