McHenry Public Library District Digital Archives

McHenry Plaindealer (McHenry, IL), 14 Mar 1877, p. 6

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} ? if- r A HOMK. BT BORAK COOLtDOK. ip n heme ? A guarded space Whrri:u> h few, unfairly Inset, " Shall nit t« gethcr. t'a<-o to tiwse, Ajitt hiwii aiul purr and be at rest f Wfcerc cuetoi-jned waits rise up between ITA Inmate JUKI the I'timnion air» s, TOhe omumoa pain, and pad and scwen Vinwa blown of fate or winds of care ? Art may blowom strong and free, And i>loasure furl her «ill;en wing. J,l4 every lndon moment be A precious and peculiar thing ? Ami pat* and f uture, softly veiled, (a hiding mists shall float and lie, Ttorffotten hah, and unaeeailed B>' either Hope or Memory, WT»iU> the luxuriant Present weaves Her perfumed spells untried, untrue, {ftrotderti ber garments, heaps her sheaves, AH for the pleasure of a few ? <Caa it be this--the longed-for thiqg - Which wanders on the restlces foam,' Vac(h«ltered beggars, birds oh wing, Acipire to, dream of, qhrieten " Home ? " Art may bloom, and ltoao^ and bliss; Grift may "refrain and Death forget; 9ot if there bo no more than this. The sou! of home is wanting yi-t. MM image from far glory caught. Fair type of fairer things to be, The true home rises in our thought. As beacon for all men to see. Urn lamp* burn brightly in the night; '" Ite flro-glowg unchidden shed Hkeir charing and abounding light On houie!e«e folk uncomforted. Rach ftwect and secret thing vritlim :< Givee cut a fragrance on the air-- A thankful breath, sent forth to win A ltttre smile from others' care. The lew, they bask in closer heat; The many catch the farther ray. Ufe higher seems, the world more sweet, And hope and heaven less far away. Ho the old mfciclf anew IP wrought on earth and proven good, And crumbs apportioned for a few,, God-l'Ieusi-d, suffice a multitude. MT GREAT AUNT'S WILL. I am a clerk in a country store, and .-sorartdinos I wish I'd been a martyr in those days v.-hen they stretched people on beds of spikes or roasted them on a ..gridiron. Then I think I could have taken a little comfort in life. This is the way of it: I am behind the counter on the side where we keep prints, and there trots up to the opposite mik\ where we ket p flannels, a customer neither young nor beautiful; I hurry around and across, and she asks for cali­ coes; then I turn her about and make my way back, and I pull down half a dozen pieces, but she just gazes at the kitchen and shelves, snys she'd like to look at the aiider piece on the top shelf; [ climb up, at the risk of breaking my neck, and get the under picce out, and she concludes ?ts8Q't what she thought it was. Then »he sayB she'd like to look "at that atripe;"' I blunder on to every other «tripe before I get her particular stripe. Then she says siie wants a little figure, and I get ali the little figures out for her. She wants to know how much 'tis a yard; I say 'tis *> cents, and she says she can get better in Springfield for 5 cents, and she looks at me suspiciously, as if I was its cheating youth. She wants to know if sill waeh; and I say I presume so; most •railico does wash, and she looks at me in­ dignantly, as if I was a saucy youth. Then she asks me if we tike eggs," and I »IT we do, and we pay 28 cents, and she says they're paying 30 cents at the other ing fun of tliena. I wish those corners would sink, and wonder they don't. "I'm your only living female relative on the father's side," said she. My business experience with females had been so embittering, I was glad to learn she was the only one on the father's side. " As you've no mother, I feel it my duty to help make a home for you." Instantly I remembered that Aunt. Louisa was worth seventy-five thousand. I think I learned that fact in early years at the paternal knee, along with who made me, and what State I lived in. I know it always stood to my infantile conscious­ ness in the relation of a primary truth. My father, all his life, courted poverty through the medium of dry goods and groceries, and went through bankruptcy as often as the law would allow. During the periodic seasons, before calling the j creditors and making an assignment, he 1 used to clasp his hands to his head and ejaculate, " Louisa might help me if she only would !" But Louisa wouldn't, or at least didn't, and, what ever may be thought of her filial affection, mature observations on the oscillations in the molasses and ginger market have convinced me of the sound­ ness of her judgment. "I'm delighted to see you, Aunt Louisa. I'll go right down to my board­ ing place with von." } Hence, with a brown willow basket in I one hand and a shiny leather bag in the j other, and my great-aunt trotting behind --why under heavens she didn't walk by my side I couldn't see !--we meandered down the street. We met Evelina Angelina Plimpton. I was engaged to Evelina Angelina. I biad enjoyed that honor ever since one *nly evening when there came up a sud­ den thunder-shower, and she clasped nrjr arm and ejaculated she was "so tint-id." An engagement was an annual episode with Evelina. When I solemnly asked Pa Plimpton's consent he didn't remove his pipe from his mouth, but just nodded and pursued his previous train of thought. Evelina smiled patronizingly upon me. Deference to the aged I knew she considered beautiful. My aunt didn't like my boarding place, and wasn't pleased with my boarding- mistress. She thought we'd better keep house, and I spent the next fortnight house-hunting with her. The great de­ sideratum seemed to be the right kind of a "buttery ;" one would have supposed butter was to be the staff of life with us. We at last found a "buttery" on the northwest corner, opening into both dining-room, having the requisite number of cupboards, having shelves that admitted of being taken out in house-cleaning time, painted a be- I witching cream-color ; and we engaged that buttery, regardless of cost or of the i character of the neighbors. | The next momentous step was to get i my aunt's "tilings" removed. Were I ! writing a scientific essay on psyohologi- ' cal distinctions of sex, I should make j one strong point the tenacious attach­ ment of the feminine mind to "things. Ten thousand dollars in stocks and bonds at stake in an unsettled estate have been known to excite less interest and create less jealousy than the disposition of an odd tablecloth. My aunt was' for some days in a har­ rowing state of indecision as to whether she had better have her things invoiced as freight or hire a car. By virtue of »toivi: and off she goes, and I put up the ! the handsome figures I learned to make prints, and am down at the farther end of the room turning fragments out of a cracker barrel, when back she comes and vrants samples. We keep the postoffice, and, by the time I get back to my cracker barrel, in comee a man who wants to know if lie at commercial college, I proved to her it would be cheapest to hire the car. I ahd to go to her former place of abode to see about getting the tilings en route, and I had to "meet them with a car­ riage" at our depot. I felt like a col­ lector of antiquities just getting an as- h&Hift a letter. He never had a letter in ; sortment over from Egypt. I shall ever Ids iiie, and he knows it, and I know it; j feel grateful to the small boys of our tnit it i« one of those facts that both par- village for their self-restraint on this ties ignore, and I go and look, and give | tempting occasion. I don't recollect a him the consoling assurance that he ; single opprobrious epithet. They treat- iiflsn't any, and he departs in peace of ! mind, j Then there is a lady who wants to maicli a confounded bit of silk braid, drab bordering on the lilac. It takes me five minutes to find one box of silk braid, £a<i five more to find we haven't drab .Sjeersi&ring on the lilac. Then she wants * ; -J isag-*iik the same shade, and I hunt •£3tfv;.*Tiwfe all the sewing-silks, and there's drab bordering on everything else under flie sun except lilac ; but I know by the way her fhnanccs swe;»p out th:'t a mer- -onatiie hoc.se not keeping urab bordering oo the lilac stands very low. I get down to the farther end of the store again, and there comes a man to the froat floor, and yells out loud enough for -every customer to hear that he's brought buck that barrel of flour ; says the bread was block and all dough in the middle. Sow that man understood when he had 'that flour that it was inferior quality, not recommended, and he had it cheap, and took it Ix-cause it was cheap. I help him roll the flour in, and I can see that he thinks he has circumvented a villain. ed my loads with a respect to which nothing but hoary hairs could entitle them. There was a cheese-press, and I don't know but a cider-mill; there was some­ thing, with four tremendously heavy legs, I always believed to be something in disguise of a bedstead. There were seven bandboxes (four large nnd three small), five feather-beds, seventeen com­ fortables, and a great deal of crockery which evidently came oyer in the May­ flower, but had much better have put back to land in the Speedwell. I need not say that our residence when furnished was neat but not gaudy. I slept under a "rising-sun" bed-quilt, and had a round broideerd mat to put my feet on when I got out in the morning. I sighed for my former cozy quarters, but I remembered my aunt'B valuation, and reasoned that, if she was my only living female relative on the father's side, I must of necessity be her only living male relative on the mother's side. I Soon after we were domesticated, I found that my aunt was subject to mys- 'Altai's the way it got-a day after day, j terious attacks, which attacks invariably *wedk after week, and I hate tea, detest seized her in the night-time, and made it HideratuH, abhor codfish, and wish calico, ! imperative that I should run for the doc- eotton cloth, drilling, hooks and eyes, j tor. Liability to these attacks precluded sad ail the i-est of the wretched necessi- j the possibility of my being away from of svn artificial civilization were at the ! home evenings, excepting Sunday and !»otk»aa of the Indian ocean. I long to be | Thursday evenings, when I was expected & savage more than I ilo to be an angel, i to see my aunt to prayer-meetings and at- w'i I «ka31 be, one of these days, though ; tend her home, though Evelina went off I do wear cloth suits, and have a shav- i in an opposite direction with another fel- iug-mng at the barber's marked in gilt low. I didn't know but justice both to Setterb, 8. 0. Haynes. I wonder that all | myself and Evelina demanded that I aelf-reapcct and sentiment of humanity should have a conversation with my aunt, hasn't long ago perished from out my boaom. Such were my reflections one fine morning just ai'ter train time, while I was we»,ghi£ip; out half a pound of black tea, when my fellow-sufferer in the dry-goods {S£kd grocery infliction called out: Here'?, a lady inquiring for yon, Sara."" In difiti-iit outline before the door stood :u kittle woman, her skirts spread out by &i!tetM£ignhr hoop like the skirts of the ft«3naXe figures v,e used to draw on our siaSoi *!• B; LOO1. I came up to make my tMm, asui eaw she had deposited a brown billow on the show-case and e black glazed bag at her side. See wore a. etriugy kind of shawl, with seemed to be and set before her, in language which even a child might understand, my views of the duties and privileges of an engaged man; but I felt extremely doubtful of her sympathy, and $75,000 was a good deal to risk. We had one servant, whose wages my aunt thought it right I should pay, be­ cause, as she said, if there was no one but herself, alie shouldn't keep a girL Our cuisine was managed with strict re­ gard-to economy. We lived largely upon soup, which consisted principally of broth. My aunt highly esteemed marrow-bones. I wonder if it is general­ ly known among physiologists how long a healthy person can subsist on a per­ sistently boiled marrow-bone ? For two or three years I had been in the habit of smoking a single cigar at the fearfully leisg fringe, and ssJHietod with numb palsy. < ^ 0 44 Are yo^aay nephew Sam'wel ?" asked J close of the day's labors. One evening I «he. | sitting on the piazza indulging in ** My name is Samuel Haynes, ma'am." j this luxury, when out came my aunt. "I'm your father's aunt, Loueezer "S<u/i w«l!" cried she, "are HrtVt*ee." rm glad toyou, Aunt Louisa." She looked a6 mo* sharply, as if I'wcs y fun' of ber. I suppose it is be- ofiose the comors of my mouth turn up you smoking ?" "Ifes'm," very meekly. "jWell," said she, calmly but firmly, " none of my money shall ever go up in cigar smoke." Then sixain, " How much jieofsJcarc.alwgos.suspecting me of mak-1 do you pay for cigars? "Ten cents." " Now, Sam'wel, I want you to take your pencil and calculate how much 10 cents a day will amount to in ayear, then how much in fifty years; then I want you to put this sum at compound interest, and see how much it will amount to by the time you are 75 years of age." It struck me that I had somehow, .dur­ ing my lifetime, met with similar prob­ lems, but I conscientiously made the cal­ culation. "Aunt," cried I, "I'm perfectly ap­ palled. Never did I dream of this. Of what mad extravagance have I been guilty!" and wildly I hurled my cigar into the camomile bed. It became generally known throughout our village that my aunt was wealthy and I was lieir-expectant, and I soon per­ ceived that, wlietheir or not I ever ob­ tained the gold, I was going to have the glory. At a town meeting, legally called, and with the Moderator in the chair, I was elected one of the nine prudential committee-men; duty--"to see about getting the wood." Our Sabbath-school appointed me delegate to a conference at Cummingford; privileges--lose my time, pay my own fare, change cars twice, stage, it five miles over a country rood and through a November landscape; pros­ pects--addresH by Deacon Thomas Jones; music, that rare and intricate composi­ tion, "Shall we gather at the river?" I secured the position of watchman at our store every other Sunday night. Aunt asked me if I expected extra pay for this service, and I said I did. Eve­ lina had talked of green reps for our par­ lor, but I found that calculations had now ascended to some kind of rose-col­ ored something, value about treble that of the reps. Aunt was at length seized with an " attack " of more than ordinary violence. I called three physicians, for I shrank from exposing myself to the irresponsible village gossip which might accuse me of not employing every effort for the pro­ longation of her life. With three doctors in attendance, she not unreasonably felt that this attack would prove finaf^ and sent for a lawyer. I was in a state of great nervous trepidation. " Is there anything I can do for you, aunt?" " Nothing now." "Has your nurse arranged your pil­ lows quite comfortable ?" " Perfectly comfortably." Solemn scenes have no place in this narrative, and I pass on to the time when we were assembled for the reading of the will--the lawyer, the doctor, the minister, and myself. The instrument ran as follows: After paying my just dues and my funeral expenses, and providing a suitable monument, I give and beqeath to my beloved nephew, Baniuel 0. Havmm, his heirs and antriguH, for their use and behoof forever, all my ^Wearing apparel and personal ornaments, with the ex­ ception of my gold beads, which I bequeath to my namesake, Louisa Haynes, of St Joseph, Missouri; all my beds and bedding, household utensils, and furniture, with the exception of my great arm-chair, which, as it came in on the Jones side. I wit>h to go to somei deserving mem­ ber of that family. I also give my nephew Samnel $5, with which to buy a reference Bible in my remembrance, and also the sealed paper of instructions accompanying this instrument, which I wish him to read a year hence in the presence of tho witnesses now assembled for the reading of this my will. The remainder of my property, both real and Eersonal, with the exception of the legacies ereinbefore named, I bequeath to the American Missionary Society, neither legacies nor bequests to be paid until a year and a day hence. When the lawyer was through reading, I had no clear idea to whom these lega­ cies were devised, but I remarked, that the American Missionary Society was a most worthy organization. The nature of the will was soon made public. Popular sentiment was that of resignation, not to say of satisfaction, on my account. My companions, who had never seen why deserving merit in my case should meet such disproportionate reward, while their own plodded along on a weekly stipend with no great-aunt's estate in prospective, naturally experi­ enced a revival of confidence in the equit­ able government of the universe. Elderly friends in church and Sabbath-school felt that I had cause for rejoicing in being spared the snares and temptations which accompany wealth. My employer pri­ vately expressed the opinion that I had been getting above my business, and he was glad to see me taken down a peg. Evahna said, "Never mind; we don't care for money." But, not many days after, Evelina told me she had begun to realize what a solemn ordinance was matrimony; she and I were both young, and had our way to make, and she thought perhaps, for the present, it would be better for us to consider ourselves only friends. I said, " Very well," and felt that I was a lonely bark tossed on a wild and watery waste. I had read of instances similar to mine where the sealed packet or the old Bible proved to contain bank-notes ; but, finger the paper left me as I would, I could make nothing of it but paper. For a year I went calmly and hope­ lessly forward in the dry-goods and gro­ cery way, and we then assembled for the opening of my sealed orders--the lawyer, the doctor, the minister, and my­ self. The first words that met my eyes as I unfolded the paper were, " And all former wills by me made I do hereby revoke," etc. With palpitating heart I passed the document to the lawyer. Af­ ter provisions and legacies similar to those in the first instrument, this latter document proceeded as follows : f To the American Missionary Society I {rive and bequeath the sum of •'?2.rS,()00. To my beloved nephew, Hamnel O. Haynes, who I hope may have learned, during the year that has elapsed, lessons of wisdom more valu­ able than money, I beqneath the sum of $25,- 000, which I direct my executor to pay over to said Haynes as soon as may be convenient. I further direct my executor to annually pay to said Haynes the income from the remainder of my property, both real and jxirsonal, and to pay from the principal to said Haynes on his thirtieth birthday, if he be living, or to his heirs or assigns, if deceased, the Hum of §25,- 0(H), an<l to pay to said Havms on his fihirty- fifth birthday the remainder of my property, be it more or less. " / I went down to the store just as usual the next morning, for I wished to show people that I had too good sense to have my head turned. When I filled our best customer's molasses jug with kerosene, I knew I had demonstrated my coolness. Ths Chairman of the Board of Select­ men wanted to know what I should ad­ vise in regard to building the Piper stone bridge ; the doctor asked what my candid opinion was concerning the com­ parative merits of muriate of ammonia and iodide of potassium in a case of pleuritis where egoph onysdenotes slight effusion, but with strong indications of adhesion of the mediastinum ; and the minister said there was an article on " Semi-Pelagianism in the Fourteenth Century," in the " Bibliotheca Sacra." he thought I would enjoy perusing. As I stood on the hall doorstep after singing-school that evening, Evelina came out back of me, and, said she, with a little shiver, " Oh, how dark it is !" It flashed across me, as I offered my arm for escort home, that to the femi­ nine imagination matrimony on the income of $75,000 is naturally a leBS " solemn ordinance " than on a precari­ ous salary of $8 a week, and nothing found but pepperment-drops. Presently Evelina remarked, "Aren't you very lonely since your aunt died ?" --tender emphasis on the lonely. My aunt had been dead a year, and Evelina "engaged" at least once in the mean- time. "Not at all; my time and attention are likely to be entirely absorbed < in business." " No one can rejoice more sincerely in your good fortune than I do, Samuel." • "I don't doubt it, Evelina ; I shall always feel confident of your friend­ ship." I leave Evelina at her cottage-gate, and I feel that, " Of all the glad words of tongue, or of pen, The gladdest are these, 4 It wasn't to have been.'" The next afternoon my employer in­ vited me to be seated behind the railing that fenced in our office, and, said he, laying his hand on my shoulder with a confidential, a parental, a sacrificial air: " Samuel, I have been reflecting upon my duty to you. You are a young man just starting in life, and starting in some respects under favorable circumstances, but everything depends upon your start­ ing right. You have always been faith­ ful to my interests, and I have deter­ mined to show my appreciation of that faithfulness. I have decided to sell out to you ? " A glance at the door showed me that the way of escape was not cut oft*. "With all the varied interests of the business you are already familiar; we are yearly drawing in more of the trade from surrounding towns ; we have the confidence of our customers ; we can buy to the best advantage. To all these privileges you will succeed. Karelyis there siich an opening for a young man. Consult our books, consider our profits, reflect upon the income from the post- office--" "Sir," interrupted I, in thunderous tones; " by the blessing of Providence and the benevolence of my aunt, who is to have a monument that will bring a glow to the bosom of the President of our Cemetery Association, I am now the recipient of a modest competence, and shall I squander more years of precious life on -vulgar, soul-wearying dry goods and groceries, subject ever to the fluctu­ ations of Amoskeags and Pepperells, or shall I retire on my income and avail myself of the humanizing influences of leisure and culture ? Conscience and the voice of reason within my soul cry, ' Live on your income !' Never more will I lift my aching eyeballs to scan yon top shelf for cotton-batting and Agawam mixed ; never shall my trembling fin­ gers seek to fit on warped pasteboard box covers ; never shall my wearied ears be greeted by the ceaseless tinkle of the money-drawer bell, or my sated nostrils by the odors of the grinding coffee ! No more shall the brown-paper bag and the white-cotton string mingle in all my dreams! Sir, I hate tea, detest salera- tus, abhor codfish, and loathe that post- office and 3-cent stamps ! " I was done, and I knew by the hush that fell upon that store that, whatever else I might be, I was an--orator.--Har­ per's Magazine. Evening Newspapers. There seems to be no better invest­ ment for money in cities of the second class than a cheap evening newspaper affords. The most profitable newspaper in Washington is the Star, a twilight organ which sells for 2 cents. In Indian- rjpolis the News, a .similar publication, has the vogue, and in Detroit another News of the same kind is at the top of the heap. The success of the last-named paper is, indeed, a marvel of journalism. It is now only a little over three years old, yet it claims, an d we have no doubt can substantiate, an average circulation of 17,000. The circulation of each day is conspicuously printed in the editorial columns, and any person is at liberty to inspect the books of the office for verifi­ cation. AM these papers are admirable news-condensers. They put everything in a small compass, and find room, after disposing of the news of the day, to print pithy editorials and pungent paragraphs, besides laying hold of all the gossip that is going. This makes an evening news- Eaper that any man may enjoy and be rief about it, wliich, it seems, is the kind of journal that most people would prefer to have after work.--Chicago Tribune. A Question of Privilege. A singular discovery was made by a young lady, at Watertown, N. Y., the other evening. A young gentleman called on her and spent two very agreeable hours. About 10 o'clock, the ohl folks having re­ tired, he concluded it time also to leave his charmer. The young lady accom­ panied him to the door, bade him good- night, and then passed up-stairs to her chamber. Some minutes later she had occasion to visit the dining-room, When, on entering, horror of horrors ! she was utterly confounded to see the young gen­ tleman she had so recently bidden good­ night sitting in one corner with the serv­ ant girl on his lap. She gets less pay at the other place, but she has more privi- A Turkish Joke. The Turks have a strange idea of hu­ mor. On Christmas day a Turkish gend­ arme, enraged with the Christian May­ or of the village af Brankortsi, Bulgaria, gave him a severe beating, saddled and bridled him, and compelled the poor wretch to carry him up and down the street. He finally drove him to the vil­ lage inn, and throwing the reins to the hostler ordered him to walk the horse up and down. The landlord ventured to in­ terfere, but was knocked down for his pains. The soldier then ordered hay to be fed to his steed, and the municipal Nebuchadnezzar had to swallow it. The Turkish officers considered this a most excellent joke. EDUCATION. Interesting Statistics from the Report of Commissioner Eatoflfc Gen. Eaton, the Federal Commissioner of Education, has issued his report for 1876. It shows a total school popula­ tion in thirty-six States and eight Terri- toridfe, excluding Delaware, the Indian Territory, New Mexico and Wyoming as not reported, of 14,007,522. The total enrollment of pupils in the public schools of all the States is 8,756,659. The total number of teachers reported is 249,262. In Alabama, Delaware, Kentucky, Ne­ vada and Texas the- same salaries are paid for the same work to men and women teachers. The total income for public schools in all the States and Ter­ ritories, except North Carolina, Idaho, Washington and Wyoming, is $88,648,- 950. The total expenditures for public schools in the Union, excluding Dela­ ware, Georgia, Missouri, Idaho and the Indian Territory, not reported, is $81,- 932,954. The value of school property reported from twenty-nine States and six Territories is $173,833,545. Statistics are given of 137 normal schools, with 1,031 instructors and 29,105 students. Fourteen normal schools, including the one in Michigan, each receive an annual appropriation exceeding $17,000. Be- Eorts exhibit from 131 commercial and usiness colleges 594 instructors, 26,109 pupils, and 19,009 volumes in their libra­ ries. There are 95 kindergarten schools of which information is* given. These have 215 teachers and 2,809 pupils. Ther« is an increase over the number re­ ported last year of 40 schools, 91 teach­ ers and 1,173 pupils. Fortv-one schools for the deaf and dumb are report­ ed. These have 293 instructors, 36 of whom are semi-mutes, 5,087 pupils. There are 29,640 volumes in libraries; value of grounds, buildings and apparatus, $6,136,815; amount of State appropriations during the year, $1,049,524; amount received from tuition fees, $94,520. Twenty-nine schools for the blind, with 498 instruct­ ors and other employes, and 2,054 pupils, report. The value of grounds, build­ ings and apparatus is $3,393,467; ap­ propriations during the year, $551,786. A statistical table affords information of 278 other institutions, classed as fol­ lows ; Orphan asylums, 154; soldiers' orphans' homes, 17 ; infant asylums, 12 ; miscellaneous charities, 71; industrial schools, 24. The number of inmates re­ ported in these institutions is 54,204, under the supervision of 1,789 teachers and officers. The income reported for last year was $2,794,264; the ex­ penditures, $3,633,687. Eighteen States and the District of Columbia re­ port 47 reform schools. Reports were received from 9 schools for the feeble-minded. The whole num­ ber of inmates is 1,372, under the super­ vision of 317 instructors and other em­ ployes. The Commissioner remarks that the effect of the financial depression throughout the country is seen in the reduction of the amount of benefactions for educational purposes during the year now closing, the total being $4,126,562. In 1874 it was $6,053,304, and in 1872, $11,226,977. In educational benefac­ tions Pennsylvania stands far before the other States for the past year, showing the mnount ©f $810,672. The nearest to this is New Hampshire, with $475,760. The Rage for Blue Glass. The "blue-glass" mania still rages. Somebody must be benefited--or fancy so--for violet-colored windows are on the increase, and the trade in blue glass is uncommonly brisk. Strange cures are reported, and the science journals are telling us the profound folly of the whole thing. There must be two sides to make a discussion. We trust we shall not in­ fringe any copyright by culling for our readers some poetical views of the "blue- glass cure" which are floating through the press: " Everybody now is ' blue glass' wild, From oldest woman to youngest child ; It cures all diseases, dyxpepsiu and gout, And puts physicians completely to rout." " Like hydropathy And planchette weird, The blue-glass ray Will have Its day, And pass away." LHtfa Boy Blue, come blow your glass, The sheep's in the meadow, the cow's in the grass. If you take panes, the doctors can keep Locked in the drug store fast asleep." " Spread the glad tidings throughout the land, And let there be music by the bund; Blue glass, blue glasn, 'tin nil t.lw rage, And the greatest discovery of the age I" Fractional Currency Lost. The examination of the fractional cur­ rency redeemed since the issue of silver makes it probable that not less than $10,000,000 of the first, sec­ ond and third issueB have been lost or destroyed, as well as $5,000,000 to $6,- 000,00ib of the fourth and fifth issues. The issue of silver began in April. Since that time to Feb. 1, of every $1,000 of the fractional currency of the fifth issue $606.08 has been redeemed ; of every $1,000 of the fourth, $365.01 ; of the third, $10.73; of the second, $0.81, and of the first, $0.83. If the calculations made above of the loss or destruction of $15,000,000 of fractional currency be correct, there were left in circulation only $9,000,000 or $10,000,000 on Feb. 1. "A Slight Cold," Coughs. Few are aware of the importance of checking a cough or "SLIOHT COLD," which would yield to a mild remedy, but, if 'neglected, often at­ tacks the lungs. "Braum's Bronchial Troches " giVe sure and almost immediate relief. THERE «re probably a hundred or more persons in this and neighboring towns, who daily suffer from the distressing effects of kid­ ney "troubles, who do not know that Johnson.* Anodyne JAnimenl is almost a certain cure. In severe cases, great relief may be obtained, if not a perfect cure. WE notice that the agricultural papers all over the country recommend the use of XherUtav's Cavalry 'Condition J'owtlers.--Ex­ change. Farmeas and others in this section have long known and appreciated the advant­ age of these powders over all others. LAME and painful backs, and weak­ ness across the kidneys, are relieved by Collins' Voltaic Plasters, which are worth a regiment of doctors and acres of plants and herbs in the treatment of such cases. MILLIONS of bottles of BURNETT'S Co- COAINE have been sold during the last twenty vears, and the public have rendered the verdict that it is the best hair-dressing in the world. RHEUMATISM cured at once by Durang's Rheumatic Remedy. Send for circular to Hel- phenstine & Bentley, Washington, D. (J. VEGETABLE Pulmonary Balsam, the great N6W England cure for coughs, colds and consump­ tion. Cutler Bros. & Co. s, Boston, only genuine. ff-'--r- Wonders of Modern Science. The perfect accuracy with which acientisbi ' are enabled to .deduce the most minute particiij lars in their several departments appears afc most miraculous, if we view it in the light of jthi early ages. Take for example the electro-rnagf* netic telegraph--the greatest invention of thf age. Is it not a marvelous degree of accuracy which enables an operator to exactly locate a fracture in a submarine cable nearly three thoi> sand miles long? Our venerable "clerk of th0 weather" has become BO thoroughly familial; with those most wayward elements of natur® that he can accurately predict their movement* He can sit in Washington and foretell what the weather will be to-morrow in Florida or New York, as well as if several hundred miles did ncd intervene between him and the places named. And so in all departments of modern science, what, is required is the knowledg« of certain signs. From»these the scientists deduce accu­ rate conclusions regardless of distance. A few fossils sent to tho expert geologist enable him to accurately determine the rock-formation from which thev were taken. He can describe it to you as perfectly as if a cleft of it were lying on his table. So also the chemistgcan determine the constitution of the sun as accurately as if that luminary were not ninety-five million miles from his laboratory. The sun sends certain signs over the "infinitude of space," and the chemist classifies them by passing them through the spectroscope. Only the presence of cer­ tain substances could produce these solar -signs. So also, in medical science, diseases have cer­ tain unmistakable signs or symptoms, and by reason of this fact, Dr. Pierce, of the World's Dispensary, has been enabled to originate and perfect a system of determining, with the great­ est accuracy, the nature of chronic diseases with­ out seeing and personally examining his patients, lie has spared neither pafins nor expense to as­ sociate with himself, as the Faculty of the World's Dispensary, a large number of medical gentlemen of rare attainments and skill--grad­ uates from some of the most famous Medical Colleges and Universities of both Europe and America. By aid of Dr. Pierce's system of dl? agnosis, these physicians and surgeons annual­ ly treat, with the most gratifying success, many thousands of invalids without ever seeing them in person. In recognizing diseases without a personal examination of the patient they claim to possess no miraculous powers. They attain their knowledge of the patient's disease by the practical application of well-established princi­ pled of modern science to the practice of medi­ cine. And it is to the accuracy with which this svstem has endowed them that they owe their almost world-wide reputation for the skillful treatment of all lingering or chronic affections. This system of practice, and the marvelous suc­ cess which has been attained through it, demon­ strate the fact that diseases display certain phe- nomina, which, being subjected to scientific an­ alysis or synthesis, furnish abundant and un­ mistakable data to guide the Judgment of the skillful practitioner aright in determining the nature of diseased conditions. The amplest re­ sources for treating lingering or clironic dis­ eases, and the greatest skill, are thus placed within the easy reach of every invalid, however distant he or she may reside from tho physicians making the treatment of such affections a spe­ cialty. The peculiarities of this scientific system of practice are fully explained in tho Appendix of "The People's Common Sense Medical Ad­ viser "--a book of over nine hundred large pages, which is so popular as to have reached a sale of almost one hundred thousand copies within a few months of its first publication. It is sent (post-paid) by the Author to any ad­ dress, on receipt of one dollar and fifty cents. Address, R. V. Pierce, M. D., Worlds Dispen­ sary, Buffalo, N. Y. A POSITIVE cure for rheumatism--Du­ rang's Rheumatic Remedy. Send for circular to Helphenstine & Bentley, Washington, D. C. FOREIGN claims collected by 0. H. E. Heath,English lawyer, 39 Ashland block,Chicago. DURAWG'S RHEUMATIC REMEDY never fails to cure rheumatism. Sold by all druggists. PATENTEES and inventors should read advertisement of Edson Bros, in another column. Porfect Hair Dressing A Promoter h of the // Growth of the Hair. ' / A Preparation , ; / Free fron irritating matter. • 1091 • • I, UUBNETT'8 COCOAINE., j | For prpjervina oiul beautifying the ! | aud it Jurk aiul : j .Thc Cncooitie hoWs in a liquid form. | Slanjo proportion of deodorized j Cocoa-nut Oil; prepared cxpnwflly for thU purpose. ?. ° w r •-•"•npomid Po«sc88c.« tho' pociillar properties which so exnilivjK auit the various conditions of tbe IHI, | j man huir. ' ! 1 ?' •oftrns tl"> hair when hard and dry/ j it the irritated aealp akin, j! It affords the richest lustre. I j It remain# longest iu effect. ) j It is thc JSctt and Cheapest l j H A I R D R E S S I N G ,! IX TJ1K WORLD. j • DIRECTIONS. j j; Apply with the hand, or a sort brushy t every other day. or as often as thTraw^ .may require, rubbing it thoroughly' i Into the roots of thi- hair. ^ " To remove Ix.uirun, f j wash the head with OL-it.VETr;s'kWLa i-JSTON. ruhJ.y with a towel,and | ply the Cocoainc at directed. j r U K P A J l K D O N L Y B V \ \ JOSEPH BUENETT & CO. BOSTON. '"Art of Conprccs, trict o* Court -- r-- dS WNMMU WMSGUED or PURE GOD LIVEE OIL AND LIME. T° One* and All.--Arc Yon Suffering from a cough, cold, nsthraa, bronchitis, or any of the various pulmonary trmihlaa that RO often end in oonsmnption? jP* H?9 ifboT*:* I*ure Co<i Lirer Oil awtf a and Ilia rnm<u4a Tki. 1_ x_i Sold by all dniffinsta. KfetV WILL€OX & GIBBS AUTOMATIC Latest Invention, and producing most Marvelous Results. Tr*4«» Mftrk in ] Only machine in the w-.'J With Automatic Tension and Stitch Indicator. of eTvrv machine. SILENT 8EWIIG MACHINE. Send Postal Card for Illustrated Price List, Ac. Willcox & Gibbs S» M. Co., fCor. Bond St.) 658 Broadway, New York. CARD STOCK! IN ENDLESS VARIETY. We have just reiselvedl from the Eastern market a tare* •apply of ( lards and uardhoard. comprising ail the new and latest dt-HuiiR, which w® offer to dealers and con. •amen at very low ficuras. Send 91) cents for sampl# packages and prices before purchasing. We have a»v. ®ral new styles never before offered in the West. Ad. dr*M THE XKWSPAPKK UNION, 114 Monroe KtM Chicago* 111. THIS NEW ELASTIC TRUSS lHaa a Pad differing from *11 ethers la [oup-shape, with Srlf Adjusting Ball la center, adapta itaeff to all itooaof the body, while th« ball in _ wfm _ th" <"up presses back ttn> in. (Bn O TRUSS JM testincs just aa a person SS? would with the thKc:™™ J IIII-*^ llgbl presur* the HeruU ia h-M aecorely daj una night, and a radical oure certain It 1» tarablf aod oheap. S«oi bT mall. Clrealara rr««. SOOLKSTON TRUSS CO.. Marshall, Mictv. SENSIBLE

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