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"Pledged but to Truth, to Liberty and Law;,Wo Favors Win us and no Fear Shall Awe." VOL. 2. .M'HENItY. ILLINOIS, WEDNESDAY, MARCH 21, 1877. NO. 34. Published Every Wednesday by J. VAN SLYKE Editor and Publisher. Office In Riverside Block, Over Smith Bros. A OO.'B Store. TKHM* Of SUBSCttlPTlON: *ne Year, (ill Advance,)- 60 If not Pail within Three Months,..........2 00 5nlwcrii»ll»>ns .received for three or six months jn the same proportion. BUSINESS CA11D8. u. T. IHWWS, M. i>. PIT-Y^inAN ftivl Sur-reon. Office in Brick Block over (x. Maves Clothing Store Water Street, Mc.Henry 111. " 1TA. BEKKSM. D. PHYSICIAN and Snrpeon. OfflcR at residence, two doors West of Post OfVicc, M'•Henry 111. O. J, HOWAitD, M D. W and Surpreon. Oflic of Howard & Son, Mcllenry, 111. JjHYPTrtAN and Sursreon. Office at the store F. J. BARM A3*. "t Orders sol ic i ted. CIGAR Mannfnc ' t i iMcllenry 111 tovy No. 171. Fac- RICHARD BISHOP, ATTORNEY AND OOITNSKLOR AT LAW. Office in rear of Murphv & Bishop's Bank North Side Public. Square, Woodstock, 111. GEO. A. BUOK1.IX, NOTARY PUBLIC, Conveyancer and In­surance Ajrent. Office at Bucklin A Steven's Store, near the Depot, Mcllenry, III. K. E. RICHARDS. HAS a complete Abstract ot Titles to land in MeHetirv County, lil^iois. t*1-Office with TTnnnty Clerk, Woodstock, 111. UOBT. WRIGHT. Manufacturer of Custom Made Boot* and Shoes. None but tlie l»est of /naterial used and all work warranted. SliopNorthwest rorner Public, Square, Mcllenry, 111. Kit. 11KCHTLK. HOUSE, Sicnaixl Ornamental Painter, also Fancv Sketches, Scenerv, &c., McHenry III. Will do all work promptly and at rea­ sonable rates. CHARLES ROUsE. BARBER. Shavins, Hair Cutting, Sham-pooim; and everything pertajsiuK to the business done in the best style of the art. 9ttop( near the Depot, McHenry. E. M. OWEN. GENER.1T, !>ealer anil Man Hf;tetuvers Agent in Leading Farm Machinery. Prices low and Term* favorable, McllHVK V. - - ,•> - - ILLINOIS. GEO, SCHRKINER. SALOON and Restaurant. Nearly opposite the Parker House, McHenry III. <3fr*First-Olas8 Billiard and Pool Tables. rtirwli oppoeite sli Ovstciv J. BONSfcRTT, - SALOOUff and Restaurant , Nearly Owuu'* Mill, Meilenrv, 1II, l're •erved up in any shape desired, or tor sale by (tie Can, WGOOD STAHLIKG FOR HOUSES. .#* BUSINESS CARDS. ------• ~"" ~ • gb " E. BENNETT, M. I)., SURGEON and Acfoncher. Diseases of Women a Specialty. Office and Residence on Clay Street, Woodstock, 111. * W. II. BUCK, M. D., HOMEOPATHIC Phvtician and surpeon.-- Office East. Side Public Squaris, Wood- Stock, 111. Office hours 11 to 1-2 A. M., and 2 to 4 P. M. W. H. SANFORD, Merchant Tailor. In the store of C. H. Dickinson, East side <ff Public Square, . ' WOODSTOCK, ILL. • A flrood Stock of Fine Cloths for Suitmcs al­ ways on hand. Suit*made to order and a lit warranted- Give me a call. ' ' W. H. SANFOttIK Woodstock 111..Sept. '27th, .1*75. M. ENGELN. OUN-SM X TH. Will change mm- zle loaders, both single and double, to breach loaders. Keeps on hand all kinds of Gun Ma. terial. All work warranted. Shop opposite Perry & Martin's Store, Mcllenrv, III. *|f£Y STA fftj. H. K. WKiHTMAV, Proprietor. First e! ri«fs, with or without drivers, fnrnisl •lass died lit reasonable rates. Teaming of all kinds ilone on short notice. O. W. OWEN, WATCH MAKES & JEWELER, McHENRY I I.I.., Dealer in ail kinds ot American and Swiss Watches, Clocks from the best factories in the countrv. Silver, plated wait;. Stiver Spoons, ALSO AGENT FOR THE Weber and Bradbury Pianos AND THE JOS. WIEDEMANN. the Depot lay or Warm aud cold1 SA.T. .OON and l !e«tanr: inl . Near Mcllenry 111, Hoarders bv the day or week a t reasonable ra te ; . nealx a t a l l hours , iWGood stnbliiiK for Horses. _o* W. W. KLLSWGKTII. BREEDER O the Celebrated Mairie Hoc. Also Lijtlit.and Dark Brahma Fowls. Pi^s shipped to all points by express. P. O. Ad. iiress, Woodstock. 111., REPAIRS Watches, Clocks and Jewelry al l kinds. Also Repairs Viol ins ill the be PETER LKICKEM. of St possiltie manner, on short notice and at rea- «onikt)le rates. Also Violins for Sale, ftliop ?rsjt door North of Riverside Block, McHenry H, MCHENRY HOUSE Mclfonrv, 111, John Karnes Proprietor. Centrally located and t'«.c t»est-of accom­ modations .furnished'.- Charges reasonable. F. KLEIFGEN A SON, CARRIAGE, Waeon and House PaintinK done on Short Notice, All work war- ranted. McHenry III,, South of the Publte Square, MATTHEW. KARGES. H3USEi Siirn and Carriage Painter. Also CalsoniiniiiK done in the best of manner. All order* promptly attended to and work warranted. Residence at the McHenry IIou se, McHenry, 111. RICHMOND HOUSE. RICHMOND ILLINOIS. Frank Foster Pro. prietor,. (rood accommodations for all parties. Samplerooms for Salesmen. Livery fttahle attached. Public Hall for Lectures, Shows &e., The McHenry Brewery. King & Herbes, Proprietors. THE best of Beer Shipped to any part of the country and warranted as represented.-- 3rders solicited and promptly attended to. FRED. RENICH, CIGAR MANUFACTURER, --AND--, WHOLESALE TOBACCONIST. WOODSTOCK, ILLINOIS. PATENTS. Persons desiring to take out Patents, or de. iring information from the L\ 8, Patent Office should consult F. A. LEHMANN,SOLICITOR OF AMERICAN AND FOREIGN PATENTS, Washington, D. O. Examinations free. NO PATENT NO PAY, Send for Circular. For Sale, 3^he undersigned offers for Sale, me Brick Stove on Water Street, in the village of c.Henry, now occupied bv Mrs.C. H. Morey, as a Millinery Store. It is 14x35, the upper story hcint? rinislu*»l offasa restuence. TKEMS BBASONAHLK Iiniuireof C. H. MOBEY J^cHenry,Ill. Nov. 1st. 1875. Mi Whi hich we believe to be the best OrptiMi in the market. We think vc knew thai, by experi- enev, and we iwlicve it, Jur itia laifliit'd up by the Bes1 Musicians in the Worfd; I also aei i o i l ier Organs a t less pr ices than the Kstey, but can ' t rueeoiujnend them to be as good, ' O. W. OWEN, July 23, TO THE WORKING CLASS.--We are now prepared to furnish al l c lashes with constant employment a t home, the whole of the t ime, or for their spare moments . Business new, l ight and prol i la-ble . Persons of e i ther sex easi ly earn from 6'» cents to 3T> per evening, and a proper! jonaI sum by devot ing their whole t ime to ' the business , B<M s and gir ls earn near ly as ui t ie l i as men. That a l l who see this not ice may send their address , ami tes t the business we make this unparal le led offer : To s-uch as are not wel l sal is t ied we wil l send one dol lar to pay for the t rouble of wri t ing. Ful l par t iculars , samples worth several dol lars to commence work on, und a copy of Home and Fireside, one of the largest and best I l lustrated Publ icat ions, a l l sent f ree by inj i l . Reader , i f you want permanent , prolitable work, address* GEORUK SI'INHON & Co., Port land, . Maine. THIS PAPER IS OK Ftl^C WIXK WHer© AitverUaiag Coiitractp «AT> bear>«»' INOTICE. 50,000 lbs. of THE PKKILS OF CIVILIZATION. Every condition of liuni.m life and society has its own rtrawbacLs. Thert is no iwonliar benefit or blessiug that is not ba'.itided by some corresponding disadvantage "or peril. In barbarotis communities there are no Iiitfc^ial ma­ chines, and such moral monsterslks the "Dynamite Fiendv are unknow n, crimes that prevail areof the primitive and simple kind that have been kno4*n everywhere from the beginning of hu­ man History. But with the growth of civilization and the advancement of science,'.crime becomes more subtle" more mysterious and more dangerous. The vfailroad wrecker" is the latest and most monstrous development of American progress. A few weeks ago a"young man *v-as arrested for placing obstructions on the track of the Long Island Railroad, with the manifest in- WASHIXGTON COUUKsroSDKNCE WASHINGTON, I>. C., March 12, IS?7. If our new President hasn't a lame right baud and arm by this time, lie is made of bras# or some other iniweara- ble substance. The hand-shaking which began before he "tepped from the cars upon his arrival here is still going on with no apparent falling off. Every moruitig. every afternoon, and every evening thus far the White llouse has been thronged with visitors every one eaget to shake hands with the Great man of the day. A regular army pf ofiicff-seeker? besiege him at ijtll hours of tfic day and night and really his rosy position is not witliout its thorns. YeiSerday tiie hours before nrfon were giv#i up to t!ie reception of.Congress-. inekand officers. At noon the Coiuin- buiCadets, a smart yomig company thai acted as the President's body tentiou of wrecking a ^rain% At about j gu^d inauguratioh day. having accom­ panied his party from Ohio for tlie puplose maix'hed to the TV'hite House to^iid tlie President aud Mrs. Hayes go^d hye. The Cadets formed into line in the big East Room and, when thj| President and his wife appeared, fiftkl around the room and shook hands wi£h them receiving 111.1113* pleasant woi-ds and in return giving them I lie "Sweet Bye ami B)7e," in their fine baJpd's best stvle, as thev took their departure. After twelve o'clock tlie general reception began and the wait­ ing crow*d was admitted Into to Pres­ ident's office, when the usual process of hands Was gone through with. Ltytlie evening a reception of the <ifli- of the Army, Navy, and Marire G|>rps was given, an exceptionally bril­ liant affair. The Executive MTtnsion^ was most brilifKntlj' illumined, and the Magnificent _mtjfornts ®f the officers gUttciing it* the bright gas-light was fairly dazzling. The officei*s of the ^ir:ny were presented by General Sher- iliaiu those of the Navy by Admiral jPorror. Several ladies assisted Mrs. itluycs, and their exquisite toilets did i.1)on01* to the occasion. Mrs. Hayes irora bhic-k silk with sky blue cording, j$nd black velvet bows lined with sky j j lufi silk. Her hair was arranged very plainly, brushed straight away from the .brows and confined in a knot at the the same<$t.iuie an unfortunate wretch believed to be a maniac, was detected on a side-track waiting for the arrivsil of an express- train which lie expected to see smashed into fragments by means of obstructions which he had placed in its path. Still more recently an attempt WHS made to throw an ex­ press train off the Erie road, near \V»- verly. Timbers had been chained across the road-bed from rail to rail in such a way as to insure aw appalliug calamity, had not the obstruction been discovered by the track-walker in time to enable him to give warning ef the danger. It will also be remembered that daring the investigation of the fearful Ashtabula bridge disaster there were some who adhered to the theory that the catastrophy was deliberately planned aud brought about by railroad wreckers, inspired by the hope of being, able, during the confusion succeeding the fall of the bridge, to rob the ex­ press company and plunder the dead or dying passengers. In this case, howev­ er, there was no satisfactory proof to sustain a hypothesis so horrible; and decent solicitude for the honor of hu­ man nature enjoins it upon us to reject any such explanation unless sustained by overwhelming evidence. Yet, if^ spite of the natural reluctance to be-» lieve in that degree of depravit3 r whieU; --AT TIIK-- JANESVILLE WOOLEN MILLS XOILTII MAIN STREET. THE subscr ibers wish to inform their patrons and everybody that they wil l manufac­ture their Wool Into good substant ia l Cassi . merei , Doeskins , Flannel and s tocking Yarn, 011 shares or by the yard or pound, on sat isfac­ tory terms; or wil l buy their Wool and pay the highest market <>ri«o. and sel l them good substant ia lC-assin.eres a t #1.0" per yard, and al l other goods a t the same rate . W i l l pav half cash 011 good t iny lots , not too small . Wil l pay Express charges on all lots ol \\ ool of ?i0 pounds or more and return the goods, t ree of charge. Wil l card their Wool into rol ls for f ic per pound ; a lso card Wool the same day when from a dis tance, i f possible . Wil l dress their t \ t th 011 the usual terms. Carpets washed; pr i rw^rents per yi i rd , F4rmers , pa­ t ronize home iniS&dry. 9.MS _ - - -* -* IX exchange for (ioods, W3nt6£!j"" Wool-Grease, Tallow asu! V. 'uoi l , for which the highest pr ice wil l be paid. K. A. . WilEELEK&CO. Jai tesvi l le , Wis. , May 30th, is ;*; . of destroying b3* a sudden and awful death hundreds ol' inen, women at^ chUdt^f^against whom tb«i_ jiei'jjgtrafe of the crime lias no grievance, amti wiiom he has never seen, tlie fact must be conceded that these things are fre­ quently attempted and sometimes achieved, ami the railroad wrecking is one of the new features of our modern civilization. We should prefer.to be­ lieve, if that were possible, that this most horrible form of criuie is never attempted, except by maniacs. The evidence, however, will scarcely justify that conclusion. Attempts of this kind have been made under circumstances showing that the motive was the ex­ pectation of beiwg able to pilfer a lit­ tle money and jevvelrj* from the per­ sons of the slaughtered passengers, and that tbey have sometifues been inspir­ ed bj* a de<ire to wreak vengence upon a conductor, an engineer, a lire man, or sotne in d i v idual passe nge v k no wit to. be 011 the train.. Such occurrences illus­ trate the fearful possibilities that lurk in the dark places of human nature. They show that neither civilization, nor Christianity, nor tlie diffusion of education, nor the spread of knowledge nor the new appliances and machinery of modern progress nor all tlie^e com­ bined, have been able to extirpate the breed of moral monsters. I11 the midst of the light and knowledge of the last quarter of the nineteenth ewnttiry. in the great centers of refinement and wealth and culture, crimes are constant­ ly occurring, the conception of which implies more cold-blooded cruelty and more stolid brutality than any perpe­ trated among savuge tribes, or during .the darkest periods of history. But of all these, it must be conceded that rail­ road wrecking ir- the most monstrous, inhuman and fiendish. wpuld set delilierately about the taak^|fytek, ornamented only with a White rose. Sirs. Hayes is said to dr«ss$ very idaiuly on all occassious and her appear- Jiere thus far verifies tlie rumor, She never wears the universally toler­ ated, if not admired, low sleeveless corsage, which remarkable preference is taken in high dudgeon by some of the high-toned ladies iu our "first so­ ciety." Of course it would' not have been the thing for all the parade and confu­ sion attendant upon a Presidential in­ auguration te have passed with 110 ac­ cident er hoirible event of somto kiud; and we have it iu a number oommitted on the Capitol steps the bight after tlie inauguration, just at twilight. Two men vVerc found l>'ing there and were both taken up for dead, but one was found to be onjy badly bruised aud dead drunk, and titer had his neck brok­ en and skull brushed. The deed was done in a minutes drunken light with three or four negro?* who have not. been founds When tliey returned from the inaug­ uration to the White House and took formal possession thereof, the "Koyal Family" was presented with several fine floral tributes, a pyramid, a star with shield in the center telling the United States motto, and an American Eagle, the latter of which-is the most exquisite thing of the kind ever seen here, not even excepting Nellie Grant's wedding bell. That was wondrously beautiful, arranged as it was, with a light within and her initials 011 one side aud those of her htfsband-elect on the other, in transparencies; but this eagle, with spreading wings measuring four feet from tip to tip, eclipsed even tlie marriage bell iu beaut}'. The bird's head is composed wholly of violets, the body of carnation pinks, over five hun­ dred--the wings of lilies of the valley, and the finest varieties of gems and the tail of rare and brilliant flowers of all descriptions. He rests upon a bed of moss, and holds an olive brauch in his mouth. MAXWELL. I PIMPLES. WILL Mail ( f ree) the recipe for prcpt ing a smple Vegetable l la i in that wil l re , move Tun. Frecklos , Pimples and Motchcs, leaving :he skin sof t , c lear and beaut i ful ; plso instruct ions for producing a luxuriant prow tn of hair on a Iwld head or smooth face Address Hen Vandelf A CO., Box 51*21, No, WoosterSt . , New York. RAND'S NEW YOKK CITY BUSINESS DIKECTOKY.--This is the title of a val­ uable work of commercial reference, just issued bv "Walter Ilough & Co.. Printers and Publishers, of 14 Park Place, Xew York. It contains a full and complete list of all the Importers, Jobbers and Manufacturers doing busi­ ness in the great metropolis, classif ied and arranged by Trades and Occupa­ tions, and giving their street, and num­ ber address. It is an invaluable work tor the Country Merchant. It tells him whore to obtain anything from a needle to a steam engine, of first or sec­ ond hands.- The work-will be sent by the publishers to any address, postage prepaid, upon the receipt, of the price, which is as follows: Cloth, ftiil bound Edition One Dollar; flexible cloth bound. Seventy-five Cents; paper cov­ ers Fifty Cents. A REMAUKAIILK WIDOW. I^*dy Smith, widow of the founder of the T.inn;can Society, who died tlie oth­ er day at the age of 104, had unusual vital energy to the last. Her teeth were ahnost perfect, her eyesight did not fa*l her till she had lived a century and then only failed so far that she was unable to read, being still able, as »h« said, to see the landscape, and her hearing w^ts at worst only a little "hard." What is -much more wonder­ ful, she retained bef memory up to the very last, correcting a friend within a week of her death as to the authorship of a hymn. Lady Smith, like most per­ sons who have survived their.cotemjio- raries, was a woman" of exceptional vi­ vacity; took a keen interest in science, declared that she "was for inquiry," whatever its theological results, anu\ manifested to . tlie last a keen interest in public affairs. She appears also to have been generally loved for the grac- iousness of her character, and was men­ tioned as one of the most charming of women by the historian Koscoe. After she was 100, she was troubled with op­ tical illusions, faces crowded around her; but she had nerve enough to be slightly amused with them, und dis­ cussed the very extraordinary fact that in the multitude of faces siie saw not one that was familiar to her. INARC EKTAIN peculiarities of United States Senators are thus sketched bj* Ponn Piatt: Senator Bayard, of Dela­ ware, is the best scholar, but free from pedantry. He is a good lawyer and a strong partisan. Senator Morton, of Indiana, is the readiest debator, and has a memory for facts, names aud faces its tenacious as a scraphook. Senator Ransom, of North Carolina, makes the wittiest speech. He is the most popu­ lar Democrat in the body. Senator Windom, of Minnesota, is the most bus- ness-like. Senator Thurinau. of Ohio, has the best balanced mind in the Senate. He is a jurist, a legislator, a politician,and a man of letters. Senator Edmunds, of Vermont,called the scalpel! Senator, makes the most causticspeech- es. ^Senator Sharon is the wealthiest Senator. lie is also the most diffident Senator Ingalls,of Kansas, is inclined to literary pursuits. Was prominently associated with the Kansas Magazine, Is very bright. Senator Sargent, of California, is an indefatigable worker. Devotes more hours to the iuterests of the Pacific coH«t and his constituency than any other Senator. Senator Booth of California, is the George William Curtis of the Se late. He commits his speeches to memory. Senator Gordon, of Georgia, is the Soldier Senator. Magnanimous, courteous aiul, brave, he is universally respected by his collea­ gues. Senator Kernan, of Xew York, is the Catholic Senator, and oue of the strong men of the body. Senator Alcorn of Mississippi, is genial and witty. He seldom takes up the time of the Senate, but when he doos speak is listened to with more than usual attention. Sena­ tor Dorsey, of Arkansas, has the hand­ somest wife ®f any Senator, distinction enough for one man in a beauty-loving nation. , JGF~A gentiernan on board a steam- boat with his family, was asked by his children, "What makes the boat go?" when he gave theiu a very minute de­ scription of the machinery and its prin­ ciples in the following words: "You see. my-dears, this thingumbob here goes down, down through that hole, aud fastens the jlgtuaree, and that con­ nects with the crinkumcrankum; aud that man--you see he's the engineer, you know--kind of stirs up the what- do-you-cali-it with a long poker, und they all shove along and the boat goes ahead. Bucklin &: Stevens have a large stock of Clothing which thev* will sell at very low prices in order to reduce stock. fifejT^A contractor in the Highlands was waited upon by a deputation from his workers to request him to "make 110 pit of di fie re uce in the wages, but shust a wee change in the time of pay­ ing." On cross-questioning the depu­ ties, lie found 'they wanted to be paid weekty instead of fortnightly, but they also wanted the fortnight's wages weekly. "Why, my lads." said the contractor, "j'ou are just demanding exactly double wages." *"* "Hoots, 110 Sir," said one of the depu­ tation; it 's shust as more or less as tlie same wages, put you must shust bay us twice as faster as pefore." After a little parleying, the contrac- I tor got his Teutonic logicians to resume their work at a trille advance. ifcsi~The Lincoln (Neb.) Journal stands up for its home State by saying: There are. from all accounts, parties from Nebraska in the East, soliciting aid for noed3* persons. We caiiuot see that these parties are actuated by right motives, as we do not believe there are any persons suffering in Neb- braska, beyond the ability of the State to provide for. There are some men, of course, without pride to take, and the best thing that can be done for such persons is to make the children, if any\ a State charge, and let the fathers, at least, work or starve to death. MSTTHE Printing oflice has indeed proved abetter college to many a boy, has graduated more useful and conspi­ cuous members of society, has brought more intellect out and turned it into useful channels, awakened more minds, generated more active and elevated thoughts, than many of the literary colleges o^T the country. A boy who commences in such a school as the prin­ ting office, will have his talents and ideas brought out; and if he Is a careful observer, experience in his profession will contribute more toward an educa­ tion than can be obtained almost in any other manner,--Printing Tronic** Journal. . .Never C2iv« ( p the ship. The late Rear-Admiral Joseph Smith was the father of Captain Smith in command of the "Congress" when the Merrimac attacked both that ship and the Cumberland. April 10. 1862. That Sunday forenoon. Secretary Wells drove to the church where he new the pious Commodore wap always to be found on the Sabbath, and called him out. He said to him, "Von know the unprotected state of the fleet at Fort Monroe, and that the Merrimac i* expected ont?" The reply was, "Yes'* "Well," continued the Secreter.V, "tke Merrimac came ou t yesterday; we have MO particulars yet; all we know is that the Cumberland has been sunk and th« Congress struck her flag." "Then Joe is dead," said the father, as he turned and carried his great sorrow with him back into the house of God. He. needed "110 particulars." He knew his son so well that when his ship had struck her flag he knew that son was dead. And so it proved. The next intelligence was that the first broadside of the Merrimac had killed the commander of the Congress.--New York Tribune. JfiSfSeventeencolored men leaned up against the south wall yesterday, in a row, and by and by one of them remar­ ked: "Well, now, dis is curus weather. Pears like I could hear the buds started outen de trees. Will bruddur Gardner please 'splain what sort ob weather U ̂ gwin to prevail aroun 'heah in bout a we«k?" "Geinen," replied the aged •nan as he walked down the line."de best way is to be on boaf sides de quea- huti, and den yon is ready for de main emergency. Before 1 left home di« n o o n ' I t o l e d e o l e w o m a n t o g i t o u t m y white vest an' linen cote and put all de buttons back 011. Den when I got down town I contracted for de use of fo'ther- yioneters and six snow shovels, an' 1'ze pulllckly willin to let the weather blossom out or freeze up. Dere'a nufflu like takin'.time bj' de padlock" jfcaT'The Detroit JFVee I^ess tells of a Detroit man who called on the Chief of Police to ask him: "If a fellow falla asleep in a saloon, and some one cuts the buttons off his coat, paints one ef his boots red and tlie other blue, cuts off half of his goatee, pours varnish into his overcoat pockets, and cuts a hole in tlie top of his new plug hat, is that any joke?" The Chief-Raid be didn ' t see any joke about that, but the stranger's countenance suddenly melted, and he chuckled as if greatty pleased as he re­ marked: "The joke is on the saloon! The fools thought I was asleep, but I wasn't! I was awake all the time--ha! ha! ha! Don't you see the joke aow?" The Chief didn ' t see It, but the stran­ ger laughed all the way out of tta City Ilall, aud down to the gate. «* ffcjr*Secretaries Evarts apd Schura hav* been appointed a committee of twtt to draft a set of rules to govern the appointment of persons to oflice un­ der the government. It recommends that the opinion of congressmen shall have no weight with the appointing powers, unless such opinion is asked If such a set of ri*les should be adopted* as there is no reason to doubt that it will, the election of a congressman from a given district will not be equiv­ alent to the assignment of office a in that district.. Every such hit as thia is a staggering blow to brother-^n-law officials, aud is an eucouragement to the appointing ot competent men to positions regardless of relatiou to con­ gressmen. fij^-Autliors who have beeu 111 Austra­ lia, and have written descriptions of the boomerang, had better keep clear of Detroit. A Detroit boy of fourteen con­ structed one of these weapons the other day after a minute description in a book of adventure. The book said that the boomerang would return and fall at his feet, ready for a second throw and he solemnly believed it would. He armed himself aud «went into the back yard to practice, and he was carried into the house by the servant girl aud a house-painter, his nose being smashed flat aud his front teeth shaky. The boomerang didn't drop at his feet, either because it wasn't a goed day for boomerangs, or because the boy wasn't born in Australia.--Detroit Free Pre**. fle&~A j'oung man writes to the GraMic that he wants t® be an editor^ to which the Graphic editor replies; Canst thou draw up leviathan with a hook thou lettest down? Canst thou hook up great ideas from the depths of thine intellect, and clean, scale, aud fry them at five minutes notice ? Canst thou write editorials to measure? Canst thou write an editorial t'fc fit iu a three quarter column of the paper, which shall be in length jest twe. ty-twe iuch- es, having three inches ol fine senti~ uient four inches from the beginning, and nine inches of humor in the mid­ dle. aud an outburst of m ixim and pre- cept, nine aud three quarter inches long, at tlie close? \