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McHenry Plaindealer (McHenry, IL), 29 Dec 1880, p. 6

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fSRi^ i?ff-« ^ «v, *i^r- *" ,A "*&•*$** 'i'Mt-:, L^WILR'KIIOBL" MMI «» 8M; . . wr tmn Nwintiful f»o<« . w^«*. t and •» charming to n«i "". ™>j,i ." •rt J ha*s given tt ptaw.* , wiU a flush ot disdain j 1 there; iaRS UttMr--TOT a Woman is vsirSf- Hone in her splendor; Md again she woald tarn, 'fvwtfcg mm and mora WHERE HER IMAGE W " bled the (ilwr illuMoe; tfal*| tremor of love's soft oonfu«4ea. ttNBbl rt ltoon, do not quiver nor T»e tremor of love's soft con s throb of the Sea's faithfuPbeart. And the Moon would remember and ] The virion she ni in tho wave, ' round the world »hc would winder, 1 And she knew that the Sea was her Sfeva. Aad month after month, when returning. In hot full she would glory again, Mar f«ce in the oce*\i etiil burning Gave Ux- Moon * sSight feeling of | KB the Sea followed sorrowing Aftec^ Hit breast swelHue over with love, IBs sigh* waking or.ly tbetoHphtor . Of the Moon sailing queenly atwva. Though ages on agee li*ve perished, Still Love Bins?* the changeless old tortML And w'th passioc still faithfully cuieriahea The Sea follows after Uie Moon; fallows after till cruel chore* stay him, Theu breaks hi« great heart with aaijgti; f" , Wpt the Fates over mock and delay ld>a .- v„ whose aim is unwise and too high. k* i J» w;.: >tf a. A GOOD JOKE. One fine •winter evening, early in the present oentury, Col. Blank (a (jueer name, is it not?) and his maiden sister, Patty, were sitting, one on each side of * deuglitful hickory fire, enjoying their oHmn cum dign itahi* without any inter­ ruption, for neither of them had spoken & won! for at least an hour, and that, considering the sex of Miss Patty, was certainly very remarkable. The Colonel was sitting cross-legged in a great arm chair, with his pipe in one hand, news­ paper in the other, spectacles on--fast •sleep. Miss Patty was moving herself gently backward and forward in a low rocking-chair--sitting as straight as an *row--knitting. Close at her feet was Mu»( Puss, her paws folded gracefuHy voder her, dozing very composedly, and evincing her satisfaction by murmuring forth a monotonous though rather a mus­ ical p-u-r-r, while Mr. Carlo was stretched out at full length on the rug in front of the fire, and like his master-- sound asleep. At length the Colonel, lousing from lus nap, took off his spectacles and cabbed his eyes, then, glancing them at * hnge pile of papers that lay on the ta- %!e near him. said, yawning at the same time most emphatically: " I wish Henry was hen to help me about my rents.' "Well, I really wish he was," an­ swered his sister. "I can't expect him this month, jet," yawned the ColoneL "Hadn't you better send for him, then ?" said hp sister. Upon this tne dog got up and walked toward the door. " Where are yon going. Carlo?" said the old gentleman. The dog looked in his master's face ftnd wagged his tail a little, but never caid a word, and pursued his way toward door; and, as he could not very well •open it himself, Miss Patty got up and •opened it for him. The Colonel seemed perfectly satisfied, and was composing tiimself lor another nap, when the loud sad joyful barking of the dog, an. flouncing the approach of some one, in- • dnced him to alter his determination. Presently the door was violently opened and a young man gayly entered the vtoom. " Why, William Henry, is that you ?"• «£aid Aunt Patty. £ " Harry, my boy, I'm heartily glad to •®ee you," said the Colonel, getting en­ tirely out ot the chair, and giving^ his bephew a substantial shake of the hand, ** Pray, what has brought you home so fmddenly?" " Do tell," said Aunt Patty, peeking over her spectacles. " Oh, I don't know," said Henry. " It €s rather dull in town, so I thought I jsrould just step up and see how you all :,#>re getting on." s "Well, I'm glad to see you; fit «down," said the Colonel. "So do," said his sister. "V But Harry, instead of Hiring as he was wid, hopped out of the room, but soon flopped in again, with a bottle in each Stand, and, giving one of them to the old Wj, he said: " Here, aunt, is a bottle of first-rate •naff for vou--and here, uncle, is one of :• capital Maraschino," f- "Thank you, my boy,*' said the OoloneL " Positively, it does nly heart «ood to see you in such*fine spirits." . "And mine, too," said his sister. • " What did you have to pay lor this , Here Gsrio began to jump upon him; ;;#4«po he was not obliged to hear the ques- 4 i<tion, but busied himself in keeping off the dog. r " Dewn, Carlo!" shouted the Colonel, i» little sternly, and down went the dog. "with a look so humbled and dejected •that the Colonel began to feel sorry that lie had spoken so cross. 80, stretching iont his hand, he patted the dog affec- aa 4aonately on the head, saying : " Why, Carlo, poor Carlo, you needn't •A. aj. J«»l so bad; I only wanted you to be a > '&<. titfle more poUte." : >T, . Carlo pricked up his ears and showed other signs of returning animation, • /though he did not immediately recover - \'-jK his spirits, but he looked up with an ex- t>(jiy *|»ession that seemed to say, " You need make no apology, sir," ana settled him- self in dignified silence under his m-- ' v. ter's chair. In the meantime, Henry (anxious, -either to help his uncle or himself, I can Slfesay which) had broken the seal from y;- tep of the bottle of oordial, and . drawn the cork, while Aunt Patty got ^someglasses. WeU, my boy," said the Colonel, '-tVj* "*r"OWi good humor increased every mo- X '§ * ." what's the news in Boston ? Ilfy : Anything happened ?" "No-yes," said Henry, bursting into •**. •w^ent fit of laughter. "Tes^con- |L T?r,u ' a8,. reaovered himself. m " l have got one of the jokes to . WU yoli that you ever heard of in your fe matiSi.1" ******* ** nncle ^ uii- " po tell," said Aunt Patty, t*Virwr K pinch of snuff, ̂ y°w the Colonel was noted for his ttteaordinajy reiish of a good joke, e*«a though he was a sufferer by it him- •eH he, «llmg "% La, suz," said Aunt ̂ tty. must know," said Henry, TO able to keep from laughing, . ^1* while I was in town, I met with .'*%snd particular friend of mine, - own age," here he stroked his ' ̂ ' » c<Mifounded clever fellow, ^oc^king; but as poor iut pov- 'info his pocket, and oommenoed jingling at hm penknives, keys, pooket-comb and half-cent pieces. "About two months ago he felt desperately in love with a Voung girl, wants to marry her, bat 'aarpH not, without the consent of his uncle, a very fine old gentleman, as rich jis Crtesus--do take a little more cordial." " Why--don't his ancle wish him to marry ?** " Oh, yes; but there's the rub. He is very anxious that Bill should get a wife, but he's terribly afram that he'll be taken in. Beoause it is generally understood that he is to l>e the old gen­ tleman's heir. And for this reason, his ancle, although very liberal in every­ thing else,, suspects every young lady that pays his nephew the least attention of being a fortune hunter." "The old rip," said the Colonel; ** why can't he let the boy have his own iray ?" " I think as nrach," said Miss Patty. "Well, how did he manage?" said ttie ColoneL "Why," said Henry, laughing, "he was in a confounded pickle. He was afraid to ask his uncle s consent right out; he could not manage to let him see the girl, for she lives at some distance. But ne knew that his uncle enjoyed a good Joke, and was an enthusiastic admirer of beauty So, what does he do but go •zid have her miniature taken, for she was extremely beautiful, beside being intelligent and accomplished." " Beautiful! intelligent! and accom­ plished !" exclaimed the Colonel; "pray, what objection could the old fool have to her ? " " Why--she is not worth a cent," said Henry. " Fudge," Baid the Colonel, " I wish I had been in the old chap's place--but how did he get along ? " " Why, as I said, he had her picture taken, and, as it was about time for col-, lecting rente, he thought it would make the old gentleman good-natured if he went home and offered to assist him. So, j home he went--taking with him a parcel of oranges. By the by--that puts me in mind--I bought some at the same place, but have left them in the hall.' So, skipping out uf the room, be returned with a handkerchief filled with some of the finest oranges that ever came over ; and, handing one of them to his aunt, he laid the rest on the table beside his uncla. The old gentleman smiled in every corner of his face, and put his hand into his pocket. "Whydidn't he marry her at once, and leave the rest to chance?" asked the ColoneL "Shoot me, if I would­ n't." ^" Why--you must knew that Bill loves his uncle as well as if he h id been his own father--for the old gentleman has been as good as a father to him. So lie oould not bear the idea of getting mar- ned without trying to get his consent. And then, you see, he could be married at home, and that would just suit his uncle, for he is mighty fond of a good frolic now and then." " He deserves to have her for that one thing," said the Colonel, with emotion. " Shoot me if I don't wish I had been his uncle. Don't you think so, Carlo ?" addressing the dog vtho was just coming from under his chair. S "Yes, sir," said Carlo--or, rather, seemed to say ; for he looked up with an expression so intelligent that it conveyed the meaning as plainly as though he had spoken it in words. "La, suz," said Aunt Patty. " Positively, Colonel, I think yott have got the finest dog in the country," said Henry, patting Carlo on the head. Now, if there was one thing that the old gentleman liked better than to be called Colonel it was to have his dog praised. So he grew warmer, and pres­ ently pulled out his pocket-book. " Well," said he, " did he give his oonsentA? What comes next ?" "Why," said Henry, "the old gen­ tleman was mightily tickled to see him, and mightily tickled to see the oranges. So he bade him a hearty welcome, and asked him all abont everything and ev­ ery body in town. This was just what ' Bill wanted. So, after answering all inquiries, he takes the miniature out of his pocket and, handing it to his uncle, asked him how he liked it--telling him that a particular friend lent it to him The old gentleman was in an ecstasy of delight, and declared he would give the world to see a woman as handsome as that, and that Bill might have her." "Ha!" shouted the Colonel. "The old cliap was well come up with. The best joke I ever heard of. But was she really so beautiful ?" "The most angelic creature I ever saw," said Henry. "But you can judge for yourself. He lent me the picture and, knowing your taste that way, I brought it for you to look at." Here Henry took it out of his pocket and handed it to his uncle, at the aftmo timn refilling his glass. "Do tell," said Aunt Patty, getting out of her chair to look at the picture. " Well, now, if that ain't a beauty ! " "You may well say that, sister," said the Colonel. "Shoot me, if I don't wish I had been in Bill's place. Why didn't you get the girl yourself, Hariry ? Td give a thousand dollars for such a niece." " Would you," said Henry, patting the dog. " Yes, that I would," said the Colonel, " and nine thousand more upon the top of it, and that makes ten thousand-- shoot me, if I wouldn't!" and the Colonel wiped his eyes. "Do tell," said Aunt Patty. " Then I'll introduce her to you to­ morrow," said Henry. And so he did; and in due time they were married. A Thought for the Middle-Aged. It is the solemn thought connected with middle life that life's last business has begun in earnest; and it is then, midway between the cradle and the grave, tl^t a man begins to marvel that ne let the day of youth go by so half- enjoyed. It is the pensive autumn feel­ ing ; it is the sensamm of half sadness that we experience when the longest day of the year is past, and every day that follows is shorter, and the light fainter, and the feeble shadows tell that nature is hastening with gigantic footsteps to her winter grave. So does man look back upon his youth. When the first gray hairs l>ecome visible, when the un­ welcome truth fastens itself upon the mind that a* man is no longer going up hill, but down, and that the sun is always westering, he looks back upon things behind. When we were children we thought as children. But now there lies before us manhood, with its earnest work, and then old age, and then the grave, then home. There is a second youth for man, better and holier than the first, if he will look on and not look back.--/". W. Robertson. EXCEPT a living man there is nothing more wonderful than a book; a message to us from the dead--from human souls we never saw, who lived, perhaps, thou­ sands of miles away. And yet these, in those little shecta of paper, speak to as, rouse us, terrify as, teach us, open their I hearts to us as brothers. THE DEAD PAST. A BMWi «t Ui« iHpcrtaat ln«« •« tlM Year 188ft. CHRONOLOGY. 1 Gnat Jtooda in Euglaud and 8. Pamell Rati Dillon arrive at Now Yore. 4. A Gypny c.unp in found in Prussian Silesia, with eluven persona Hitting around the remains of a firo frozen to death. 5. Br a tire at East Turner Hall, New York city, tlvc porRCns lose their livea. & Four perrons consumed in a 8an Francisco Are. 11. The island of St, Kitts, West Indies, de­ vastated by floods ; 200 lives are lost. 15. Terrible wind-storra in Oregon causes loa* of life and property. 19. A terrible conflagration occurs at Tokio, Japan, burning firtcen acres and destroying the lives of over 10ft people. 21. Colliery explosion near New Castle, En­ gland ; seventy-seven miners killed. 22. Bill for the gradual abolition of slavery in Cuba passes the Spanish Cortes. 23. A nood in the Cane* valley, New Grenada, destroys §1,000,000 worth of property and a number of lives. 25. The steamboat Charmer burns near the mouth of Red river, in Louisiana; eight lives lost 28. Fifteen minora killed by an explosion in Saxonv. 31. Kerns is received of horrible massacres in Afghanistan. FEBBVABT. 1. Steamer Bengore, from Penrath to Gib- I ^ M "h raltar, founders, lad thirteen of her crew noue lx'IUk'savt drowned. 2. Terrible hurricane in the Philippine isl­ ands. 6. Ten Chinamen cremated in a wash-house fire in San Francisco. Nine negroes burned to death in a cabin near Columbia, S. C. The #1,000,000 Cotut House at Dallas, Texas, burned. 8. Two hundred Turkish soldiers killed by the fall of a barrack at Constantinople. 9. The Dublin Theater Royal burned; eight lives lost. 10. Burning of the City Hall at Albany, N. Y.; loss, $1,000,000. 16. A family of nine persons drowned by the flood near May field, Ky. 17. An unsuccessful attempt to kill the impe­ rial family of Russia by explosion of a mine at the Winter Palace fails: ten soldiers are killed. 19. Eight men killed by the explosion of the boiler of a Feoria (III.) distillery. 20. Twenty persons killed by the explosion of shells in the Valparaiso (South America) ar­ senal. 23. Bark Strathnairn, from London for Mel­ bourne, sunk by collision, and sixteen persons drowned. 29. A steamer between two East Indian ports founders, sixty-five lives being lost. MARCH. I. The St. Gothard tunnel through the Alps is cut through. &. Twenty-three persons killed by a boiler explosion at Glasgow, Scotland. 6. The Kansas Insane Asylum at Osawatemie burns. 7. Great fire in St. Paul, Minn. 8. Twenty-four soldiers killed by the blowing up of the artillery barracks at Santiago, Ohili. 9. Thirty villages swept away by a flood from the river Vistula on the Austro-RuBsian frontier. 10. By a fire in the great weaving works at Moscow. Russia, twenty*fonr persons are burned to death. II. Boiler explosion in the flaxseed-mills at Frankfort, Ind., by which ten employes were torn to pieces. 24. Parliament prorogued by the Queen, and new elections ordered. APRIL. 1. By a fire-damp explosion in a coal min* in Belgium 150 miners are killed. 2. Nine murderers are hung at various places in the United States. 3. Triumph of the Liberals at the English Parliamentary elections. Mohammed Jan killed in Afghanistan, and his army scattered. 4. Thirty-one dwellings burned at a village of Savoy, seventeen persons perishing. 8. The Peruvians defeat the Chilians, with a kMS of 1,300 killed. 9. Seven hundred men, women and children buried alive at Mandalay, Bnrmah, as a sacrifice to restore the King's health. 12. By thu explosion of a still in a creosote factory, uear London, eleven persons lose their lives. 11. A schooner, with all hands, goes down in Long Island sound, during a severe gale. 17. Thirty men torn to pieces by the explo- 17. Groat parade of Knights Templar in Chioago. SEPTEKnm. I. By the giving way of a pontoon bridge over the river Ebro, in Spain, over 100 officers and men were thrown into the water, most of them bt iug drowned. 3. Tho steamer City of Vera Cms founders off the coast of Florida, and only thirteen of her passengers and crew at seventy-six are saved. t Gen. Roberts defeats the Afghans under Ayoob Khan, near Candahar, 9. Bv an explosion of fire-damp in the Sea- ham (England) colliery, 140 miners lost their lives. 18. The steamer Aurora, from Oporto for Southampton, founders at sea; fifty persons are drowned. 22. Bv a land slide in the Province of Bengal, British Indit, thirty-seven persons were killed, moat of them English officers and soldiers. OCTOBER. 8. Fifty miners suffocated in a mine at Katto- wits, Germany. 9. Thirty persons killed and a great many severely injured by a railway collision at Pitts­ burgh. II. Baltimore celebrates her 150th birthday. IS. News is received .of the starvation of 500 of the 700 inhabitants of the island of St. Lawrence, Arctic ocean. 14. Completion of the Cologne Cathedral, commenced six centuries ago, is celebrated. 15. By the explosion of a cooker in Haas <fc Powell's distillery, at Chicago, seven persons are killed. 18. A storm of unexampled severity sweeps over tho Northwest, accompanied by snow; many vessels and a number of lives lost on the lakes. The Goodrich Line steamer Alpena loss of about eighty lives, iag saved. 18. Victoria, the Apache chief, killed in Mex­ ico snd his bnnd scattered. 28. The coast of Englaud visited by a ter­ rible gale, and many ships and lives lost. NOVEMBER. 3. Sixty robbers, who plundered the Brazilian town of Jaunaria a year before, are surprised by soldiers and killed. 4. By the breaking of the hoisting apparatus in a Belgian mine sixteen miners are killed. 5. A typhoon passes over Japan which de­ molishes 1,090 residences 111 Tokio and drowns 100 lisliernien. News received of the loss of the Jeannctte and a number of whalers in the Arcjic sea by being crushed by the ice. Thirty Kurdish marauders in Persia are crucified by their leaders for disobedience of orders. 8. The propeller Zealand goes down on Lake Ontario with nil on board, sixteen persons. 9. Alnjut twenty persons drowned by the loss of the steamer Thomas Kingsford, on Lake On­ tario. 11. Seven men burned to death in a petro­ leum blaze near Bradford, Pa. 12. Forty-seven miners killed by ooal-mine explosion in Nova Scotia. 18. The Minnesota Stato Insane Asylum at St. Peter burned, and a large number of the inmates lost their lives. 19. The Kurds sack a Persian village and put 200 people to the sword. 18. Twenty sailors and seven passengers lose their lives by the wreck of tho coaster Oilsa off Wales. Twelve men suffocated in a coal mine in Belg um. 20. The British steamer Mildred founders in mid-ocean with a crew of twenty-eight. " 24. By collision between the French steamer Oncle Joseph and the Italian steamship Or- tigia the former is sunk and 232 persons go down. 25. Tho Persians ornament the walls of the prison at Tabreez with the heads of 300 Kurds taken in battle. 26. Propeiler Sinscoe goes down with all on board in Georgian bay. Lake Huron. 128. Lieut. Gov. Robinson, of Colorado," is killed by miners near Leadville. DECEnHEB. 1. The Electoral Colleges meet in the various State capitals and cast the electoral votes for President and Vice President. 8. Flogging abolished in the British navy. 10. One hundred miners are killed by fire­ damp explosion in a Welsh colliery. 11. A shipwreck off Nova Scotia causes the death of a crew of twenty-two persons. 12. Jay Gould's conservatory at Irvington, on the Hudson, is destroyed by fire; loss, $150,000. 18. About twenty boys lose their lives by tho burning of s wall-paper factory at Buf­ falo. NECROLOGY. sion of giant powder, near Sail Francisco. 18. Marshfield, Mo., almost wiped out by a cyclone ; abont 100 lives and $300,000 worth of property destroyed. 19. Seven men drowned off the north shore of Michigan by the swamping of their sailboat 21. The walls of tho Madison Square Garden, in New York, give way, killing four persons and wouuding several. 22. Queen Victoria accepts the resignation of the Bcaconstield Ministry. Nineteen fishormen drowned off the Scotch coast. 23. Gladstone is asked to form a Cabinet. A life-saving crew of seven men, off the coast of Michigaji, lose their lives. A son of Mayor Kal- loch, of San Francisco, kills Charles De Young, editor of the Chronicle. 25. Cyclone at Macon, Miss., kills seventeen persons. ^Sixjjeople killed by a storm in Chris- ITIAV. I. A fire-works factory, near Paris, blows up. killing a number of workmen. 4. A fleet of fishing boats driven upon the coast of Oregon, and twenty-five of the fisher­ men are drowned. 8. Fourteen persons killed at a fire in Lon­ don, England. 10. Bv an explosion of powder in the St. Gothard tunnel, in Switzerland, eighteen work­ men are killed. 14. Milton, Pa., ia wiped out by the flames ( loss, *2,000,000. 16. An explosion in a London (England) iron foundry kills twenty-tive persons. 19. United States Senator Gordon, of Geor­ gia, resigns, and ex-Gov. Brown is appointed. 25. Col. Hatch attacks the redskins in New Mexioo, and kills fifty-five of them. 28. Twenty persons perished in the floods caused by an excessive rain-strtnn in Texas. 29. The town of Savoy, Texas, is wiped out by a cyclone; about fifteen persons killed. 81. A fight with the Indians occurs in New Mexico, in which about a dozen white men are killed. J VIVE. 8. Gen. Garfield nominated for President by the Republicans, on the thirty-fixth ballot, at Chicago. 10. Twenty persons lose their lives by a cy­ clone in Pottawattamie county, Iowa. II. J. B. Weaver nominated by the Green- bockcrH for the Presidency, at Chicago. 12. Collision on Long Island sound between the Narragansett and Stonington. in which the former takes Are and goes down, with fifty pas­ sengers. 13. The boiler of the Spanish war ship Cuba Esp&nola explodes, killing twenty persons and wounding 113. 17. Neal Dow nominated for the Presidency by the Prohibitionists at Cleveland, Ohio. 18. Sixty-three persons lose their liv<* in a terrible storm and waterspout near Dresden, Germany. 24. Gen. W. S. Hancock nominated by the Democrats for President, at Cincinnati. 25. Fifty pusnenger* lost by the burning of JAXVARY. 8. Bishop Gilbert Haven, of the Methodist Episcopal Church ; at Maiden, Mass., aged 59. 4. George Jones, tho" Count Johannes," an eccentric New York character. 6. '• Yankee Locke," a well-known comedian. 10. Frank Leslie, the well-known New York publisher, aged 59. 20. Jules Fa vi e. celebrated French states­ man ; Paris, aged 71. 28. James De Mille, professor in Dalhousie College, Halifax, N. 8., and a famous novelist. 29. Edward Middletou Barry the architect who designed the English House of Parlia­ ment ; at Londou, aged 50. FEBRUARY. 6. A. E. Borie, ex-Secretary of the Navy; at Philadelphia, aged 71. 10. John Rice, the last survivor of Perrv's victory, on Lako Erie ; at Shelby, Ohio, aged &8. 11. Mrs. Tweed, wife of the late "Boss" of New York citv ; at Paris. 12. Samuel G. Arnold, for a short term Uni­ ted States Senator from Rhode Island; at Providence. 19. Signor Brumldi, the artist who designed and executed the frescoca in the Capitol at Washington. 20. Ex-Congressman Lorenzo Danford, of Ohio, killed in a raijroid accident near Bel- laire, Ohio. Benjamin Brandreth, the famous pill-maker ; at Sing Sing, N. Y., aged 71. ntiicH. 1. William Maxwell Wood, Surgeon General of^ the United States navy; at Baltimore, aged 5. Commodore Isaiah Hanscomb, United Slates navy; at Washington. 7. Judge W. H, Haves, of the Federal Court of Kentucky ; at Louisville, aged 59. 28. A It. Corbin, brother-in-law of Gen. Grant; at Jersev City. 30. Richard Van Rensselaer, the last of the celebrated New York family of that name, a banker ; at Albany, aged 83. APRIL. 5. Bear Admi il Thacher, of the United States navy; at Boston, aged 74. _ 6. Gen. James L. Reynolds, soldier and poli­ tician ; at Lancaster, Pa., aged 58. 10. W. A Howard, Governor of 'Dakota Ter­ ritory, and former Congressman from Michi­ gan ; at Washington. 10. Dr. Edward V. H. Kcnoaly, member of Parliament, and counsel for the Tichborne claimant. 26. J. Seligman, the well-known syndicate New York banker; at New York. 38. D. W. Middleton, for twenty years Clerk of the United States Supreme Court; at Wash­ ington. IffAY. 2. Ma J. Gen. Heintzelman, who commanded a division In the Army of tho Potomac : at Waslii ngton. 8. Hon. George Browne, statesman and Jour­ nalist, of Toronto, Canada, who was shot some weeks before by a discharged employe. 14. Chief Justice Sanford E. Church, of the New York Court of Appeals ; at Albion, N. Y.; agod 65. 19. Ex-Gov. Foote, of Mississippi, formerly Z-V vi'.iv passengers tost DV tne burning of IT»iV^ VT 7 . •>. m the Long Island sound steamer, Seawanahaka. "^L Utes So!Ultor S at NaahviUe, Tenn., near Now York city. 80 Jl/I.Y. 1. Four psrsons are killed by the exploainn of tbe bci'cr of the pleasure boai Mary, on Lake Minnetonka. 4. Seven persons drown by the overturning of a yacht on White Bear lake, in Minnesota. 12. A raft with forty persons npon it breaks to pieces in the Black soa, near Odessa, and all are drowned. 15. By an explosion in a coal mine at Risca, in Wales, 119 minors-- all In the shaft--are killed. 18. Cleopatra's needle, presented to the city of New York by tbe late Khedive of Egypt, ar­ rives at that city. 21. The Jersey City tunnel, in process of con­ struction, caves in, burying twenty-one work­ men. 22. Eighteen persons lose their lives through the explosion or powder in the artillery works in Kot isk, Southern Russia. 23. An excursion steamer runs over a yacht in the Detroit iiver, and seventeen persons are drowned. AUGUST. I. The Chilian transport Loa blown np by a torpedo in Callao bay, and 150 of her crew killed. II. By a train running off the track of the Midland railroad, in England, about a dozen persons rre killed. 12. Twenty persons are killed by a collision between two excursion trains near A|l«.tifp» City, N. J. 1«. The town of Eureka, Nev., is a second time almost wiped out by fire. of Wyoming, and later Assistant Secretary of State; at Washington. 19. Judge Jacob Brinkerhoff, off the Ohio Supreme Court bench for aevoral yean: at Mansfield, Ohio. AVCVST. t Gen. WiUiam O. Butler, an officer of the war of 1812 an ' th«*Mexican war, and a candi­ date for Vice Presidont with Lewis Cass, in 1848; at Carro'lton, Kv., aged 93. 9. Ex-Gov. John Bigler, of Pennsylvania; at Clearfield, that State. 16. Adelaide Neilson, the celebrated English actress ; at Pari-i, aged 30. 17. Ex-Gov. Herschol V. Johnson, candidate for Vice President with Douglas, in H60; in Jefferson county, Ga., aged 68. 17. Ole Bull, the celebrated Norwegian viol­ inist ; at Bergen, Norway, aged 70. 19. James A. Sedden, Confederate Secretary of War ; at Richmond, Va., aged 65. 22. Mrs. Charles Kean, widow of the cele­ brated English actor, herself known on the stage as Miss Eilen Tree ; in Englaud. 24. Brig, G'en. AUiert J. Meyer, Chief of the United States Signal Service, familiarly known as "Old Probs at Buffalo. 27. Chief Ouray, leader of the Ute Indians ; in Southern Colorado. 28. Ex-Gov. Paul O. Hebert, of Louisiana, an officer iu the Mexican war and in the Confeder­ ate army ; ot New Orleans, aged 62. 29. S. R. Gifford, the well-known artist; at New York. 30. Robert McClelland, ex-Governor of Mich­ igan and Secretary of the Interior in President Pierce's Cabinet; at Detroit, aged 7S. SEPTEMBER. 1. Brevet Maj. Gen. Torbert, cavalry 00m- mander during the rebellion ; lost at sea 'off tho I lorida -soast, aged 47. 10. Marshall O. Roberts, the well-known New York capitalist; aged 66. 19. Hon. Lafayette S. Foster, Senator from Connecticut from 1H55 to 1867, aud acting Vicj President of the United States for a time, dur­ ing Johnson's term, at Hnrtfbrd, aged 74. 22. Donald McKay, the builder oft clipper ships ; at Hamilton, Mass., aged 70. OCTOBER. 5. Jacques Offenbach, the celebrated opera composer; at Paris, aged 01. 17. Julia D. Bates, widow of Hon. Edward Bates, Attorney General under President Lin­ coln ; at St. Louis. 19. Chief Justice E. G. Ryan, of the Wiscon­ sin Supreme Court ; at Madison, aged 70. 20. Mrs. Lydia Maria Child, the well-known American authoress ; at Wayland, Mass., aged 78. Alfred Henry Thesiger. Lord Chief Justice of the English Court of Appeals ; at London, aged 42. 21. Maj. Thomas L. Butler, Aid-de-Camp to Gen. Jackson at the battle of New Orleans, and Surveyor General of New Orleans under President Madison; at Louisville, Ky., aged 91. 27. Bishop Daggett, of the M. E. Church; at Richmond, Va. NOVEMBER. 8. Fayette McMnllen, a leading Virginia poli­ tician, at Wytheville, Va. 9. K. L. Dr ike, who put down the first oil well at Titusville, Pa. 11. Lucretia M°tt, the well-known Quaker philanthropist and abolitionist, at Philadelphia, aged 88. 17. Signor Blitz, the famous ventriloquist and prestidi^it itor; accidentally shot white hunt­ ing iu New Jersey. 19. Sir Charles York, General and Constable of the Tower, who served with distinct iou at Waterloo; at London, aged 90. 211. Gov. James D. Williams, of Indiana: at Indianapolis, aged 73. 21. Sir Alexander Cockburn, Lord Chief Jus­ tice of tho Queen's Bench ; at London. 23. Prof. James C. Watson, the celebrated astronomer ; at Madison, Wis., aged 42. 27. Gen. George B. Crittenden, who served iu the Mexican war, and later in the Confederate army ; at Danville, Ky. SO. Evarts W. Farr, member of Congress from New Hampshire , aged 40. DEOEKBEB. 1L The venerable Madame Thiers, widow of ex-President Theirs. 19. Francis T. Buck land, the English writer on natural history ; at London. The Duchess of Westminster, Mistress of Queen Victori a's Robes, whose husband is the wealthiest persau on the globe. HOUSEKEEPERS' HELPS. aged 80. 20. D. K. Jone?, the inventor and first mak­ er of lucifer matches ; at Chillicothe. Ohio, ngivl 89. 30. Richard B. Connolly, the Tweed Comp­ troller of New York ; in exile at Marseilles, France, agod 70. 31. Hherrard Clemens, for thirteen year* monlwr of Congress from Virginia ; a pauper, at St. Louis. jrtnvE. 6. John Brougham, the noted dramatist snd comedian ; at New York, aged 68. 12. Ex-Gov. Albert G. Brown, of Mississippi. at Jackson, aged 67. 13. James A Bayard, ex-United State* Sen­ ator from Delaware ; at Wilmington. 17. J. B. Howell, editor of the Keokuk GaU CHip, once United States Senator from Iowa; at Keokuk, aged 64. 19. John A. Sutter, the discoverer of gold h California ; at Washington, aged 78. 25. Lieut Gen. T. H. Hmmes, of the Confed •rate sarvioe | at Fe.yetto?ille, N. C.*, aged 78. JULY. 8. George Ripley . President of the Mew York TrOturw Company, and a distinguished author; at Now York, aged 78. 6. William E. Carter, Chief Jtuttoe of the Supreme Court of Connecticut, 10. Jos. R. Chandler; fbr many years editor of the United fyUiisa wuette and member of Qnigrcss from 1849 to 1855, at Philadelphia, feed 88. \ 12. Tc Tom Xaykt; the noted at London. 14. John A. Campbell, at floe time Governor CAMPHOR OINTMENT. --One tablospoon- ful of brandy, two tablespoonfuls of beeswax, three tftblenpoonfuls of sweet oil, one teospoonful of strong spirits of cnmplior. SOFT MOLASSES CAKE.--One cup of molasses, one cup of butter, one cup of sugar, one cup of milk, two eggs, one tea^joonful of saleratue aud four cups of flour. SAUSAGE MEAT.--To ten pounds of meat allow one-fourth pound of seJt, one ounce of pepper, one-half ounce of all­ spice, and if liked, one-half ounce of sage. FOB CURING HAMS.--Eight gallons oi water, fourteen pounds of salt, one quart of molasses, one-half pound of saltpeter. After the meat is cut, place on a board and k t stand over night. In the morn­ ing rub with fhie salt, pack into a cask and pour over the above mixture. OBANGE PIE.--Juice and part of grated rind of two oranges, the yolks of fotu eggs, two tablespoonfuls of butter, one cup of sugar. The whites are beaten to ;i stiff froth, a little sugar added and then spread over the top after the pie is done. Return to tho oven to become slighty brown. O AI;CE ROBERT. --Put two medium-sized onions, chopped very tine, with a large lump of butter, in a stew-pan; let them brown well, constantly stirring; add a teaspoon ful> of flour mixed with half a pint of good stock; salt and pepper; cook aliout five minutes; add a teaspoon- fill of mixed mustard and one of vinegar. CIIOCOIJATE CAKE.--One cup of sugar, one-half cup of butter, four eggs, the whites beaten to a froth, one and a half cup of flour, one teaspoonful of baking powder. For tilling, take a quarter of a cake of Baker's chocolate, to it add a cup of water, boil, then add a cup of milk and when it again boils stir in a tablespoonful of corn starch dissolved in a little jnilk. Boil, thei} sweeten to taste and flavor. £ SAUCE FOR VENISON STEAK.--Put one cup of stock, a small teaspoonful of salt, half a teaspoonful of pepper, and a very little cayenne, two or three cloves, and a few alspices in a saucepan; let all boil up, then stir in a piece of butter half the size of an egg, in which a teanjioonfiil of flour has been well mixed; one teaspoon­ ful of currant jelly, one wineglassfid of claret; heat it once more, pour it through a strainer so as not to remove the whole spice. CHKE$E SOTTTFE.--This dish must be scut to table direct from the oven in tho pan in which it has been baked, as it falls if kept standing. Beat, separately the whites and volks of two eggs, add to the yolks one tablesponoful of sifted flour, two of grated cheese, a piueh oi cayenne, one of salt, and one cup of milk; when well mixed add the whites beaten to a froth, and stir briskly, pour into a buttered shallow pan, and bake in a quick oven until a rich brown--about 15 minutes. CAT;LIFIX)WER WITH WHITE SAUCE.-- Boil two small cauliflowers pick them out into sprigs and arrange them, head downward, in a pudding basin, which must have been made quite hot; press them in gentley, then turn them out dexterously on a dish and pour over them the following nance, boiling hot: Melt one and a half ounces of butter in a sanoepan, mix with it a tablespoonful of flour and then add half a pint of boiling water; Btir till it thickens; add salt and white pepper to taste; then take the saucepan off the flre and stir in the yolks of two eggs beaten up with the juice of a lemon and strained. THB aim of education should bo to teach us how to think, rather than what to think ; rather to improve our minds, go ia to enable us to think for ourselves, than to load the memory with thoughts «f oth«r men. FAR* ROTES. WABTR.--Flat warts cm the inside OF a bone's leg may be removed by scraping off the top and applying muriatic with a small stick or camel's hair brush. They ni ay l>e cut froqp a cow's udder and killed in the same way. ONE acre of land well prepared a ̂ sultivated will produce more than two which receive only the B'ame amount of tabor used on one. One cow, horse, mule, sheep, or hog, well fed and cared for, is more profitable than two fed on the amount that will keep one well. One acre of grass is worth more than two of jotton where no grass is raised.--Old Fanner. THINNING FRUIT.--There are few grape fines and dwarf pear trees that would aot be benefitted by thinning. It not inly increases the size of the fruit but benefits the future health of the tree. 3rapes may be cut away while the fruit & very small, but pears can be left until partially grown, as many of them fall when quite advanced in size. ASPARAGUS.--A writer in the London Gardener gives a detailed method adopted by him for raising asparagus shoots of twice the ordinary size. The plauts are given plenty of room--say four feet apart each way. The first two years a light crop was planted between the rows; afterward no other crop is planted. To give the right depth in planting, trenches .are dug eight inches ieep and good, strong yearling plants set therein. At the time of planting no manure is applied, but is rarely used af­ terward. By adopting this method of growing asparagus the great expense ol trenching for thick bed planting is ob­ viated. THIN SEEDING WITH OATS.--H. *C. Whitewood, of Canisteo, N. Y., sowed last spring, says the Hmbandtnan, upon five acres of measured ground, two and a half bushels of oats, or two pecks per acre, and harvested and threshed from the said five acres 355 bushels of oats, or 71 bush­ els per acre. The ground was a very rich piece of black, mucky soil, that had been marshy and coverod with alders. The water had nearly disappeared, and last fall Mr. Whitewood pulled up the alders and plowed tho ground; he was more anxious to get the land seeded to grass than to raise a crop of oats, and sowed the oats more to protect the young grass plants than for any other purpose. The catch of, grass is a decided success. About three years ago Mr. Whitewood cleared a similar piece of land, plowed and sowed to grass and three pecks ol oats to the acre aud harvested over fifty bushels per acre. He says that the oats in this case were so thick that in many places the grass was smothered. FIXING SHOES TO HORSES' HOOFS.--A new idea for accomplishing this without the use of nails is carried out as follows: The inventor takes a shoe of ordinary construction, having, say, four holes therein, and through these he pusses bands or wires of metal, two extending from or near the hinder extremity of the shoe, and the other two at short distances from eitlieiTride of the toe, the position being varied with the number of bands employed. To fix the shoe tho hinder wires or bands are first drawn tightly round the front and upper part or corona of the hoof, the ends passing through a buckle or ring, or they may be twisted together. Tho ends of other wires are also passed through the ring or under the first bands, aud, being drawn tightly downwards, the hinder wires or h*nds, owing to the conformation of the hoof' are, as it were, wedged tightly, thus fix­ ing the shoe firmly to the hoof. This invention only receives Provisional pro­ tection. CARE OF FARM IMPLEMENTS. --We often see, when passing along a country high­ way, mowing machines, hay rakes, wagons and other farming utinsils lying out exposed to the weather. Sometimes tli is is because the owner has no conven­ ient. place for them, and at other times it is through negligence, but whatever the cause it is always poor economy. The value of implements and machines nec­ essary to use in the proper Mid success­ ful management of an ordinary-sized farm, amounts to about $500. and the wear and tear of them is of necessity a great deal; but if allowed to remain out in all kinds of weather they will often receive more detriment from the expos­ ure than from actual use. The imple­ ments used on an ordinary-sized farm can all be stored easily in a buildiug 30x40 feet, the cost of which need be but little, not to exceed $50. A little thought and computation will show to any farmer the advantage of such a build­ ing for storing farm impJemsuls. But a building, however well-built, will not protect from the weather, implements that are left in the field. We must exer­ cise some care in keeping them in their places.--Rural New Yorker. APPLICATION OF MANURE.--The reader of tho agricultural journals of the day will notice that many old customs and methods in farm operations are giving place to others, some new in' both theory aud practice, and others only variations of old metliiKls, that produce better re­ sults. Through the farm paper these new and improved methods are made common property to all who read such papers. No one, at this day, need l>e at a loss for information if he advertises his need. Not very long ago manure was all applied in one way--spread on the land and ploughed under. But the idea that plants feed near the surface began to lie entertained. It was observed that the elements of plant food in the soil were drawn toward the suvfi^e by the earth losing its moisture* ®iie chief work of putting in a crtJp consists in thoroughly incorporating the manure with the soil. To do this well, the field must lie harrowed until the manure is all worked in. If litter manure is used, this is a task not easily accomplished. It is best done, perhaps* with a slanting- tooth harrow. If a sulky cultivator, is used the first time going over the field it will lie in much better condition for the harrow. Among the useful devices in pulverizing the soil is the spring-tooth harrow. If there is long stubble, or straw manure to be covered, the spring of the teeth will keep it from being drawn into heaps, as the common harrow does it. The splendid crops that are grown in the Reserve, where but a few years ago it was supposed to be impossi­ ble, is sure evidence that success may be achieved in growing grain crops, if we set resolntely to work, avoidiug errors of the past, and adopting new methods that have been proved superior.--Exchange. A Relic of the Olden Time. A romantic relic of Cowpens' battle is in the possession of a North Carolina man. It is a plain 22-karat gold ring, which was found on the Cowpens battle- field, in 1821. The inscription reads: "This and ye giver are yours forever, 1722." It was presented to a British officer by his sweetheart before his de­ parture with Lord Cornwallis for Ameri­ ca. The officer who was killed at Cow­ pens, also wore buttons of 20-karat gold on his Uniform, and some of the buttons are still owned in the Carolinas. One was presented to General La Fayette, in 1826, aud others were sent to England, the coat-of-arms on them revealing th< fcmikf to whom they belonged. KATIE'S Oofc, Katie's a rogue, it la trva, ' * Bat her eyes, Hke the sky, m so M|| "* An'her dimples so swste, An' her ankles so natn, *- WSfs if1; •fca dazed, and she bothered ma, Till one inornln' we wint for s ride, >' Wlain, demote as a bride, by aeytil6'f<t"E ' The dsrlint, *hs aat, .' v# WW the wickedest hat 'N»th a purty glrPs chin enr tied, f An' my heart, srrah thin hmr it bats! looked no tempttn' an' wak wld cheeks like the roses An' all the red posies That grow in her gardsn at ndi Bat I nst jimt M tnate^M tfas dead. Till she wii.J, wid a to«a of her head : " If I'd known that to-day Ye'd have notliinif to «ay, Fd lave gone wid my cousin, Instead.* Thin I felt myself grow very bowld. For I knew alie'd not scold If I towld Uv the love in my heart That would niver depart. Though I lived to be wrinkled and old. An' I said: " If I dared to do so, I'd lit go uv the baete, an' I'd throw Both oraiH round yer waiet, An' l>e xtalln' a tanta Uv tliim Hps that are eoazin' see ao." Thin she blushed a more illegant red, Aa she said, widout rafeln' her head/ An' her eyes lookin' down 'Neath her lashes so brown : M Would you like me to dhrive, Misther Tad f" PITH AND POINT. A NOTORIOUS eavesdropper--Bain. "CHEST" protectors--Good padlocks. DIRECTION for an organ recital--Mind your stops. CREATURES that ou not have mnch cheek--Pigs. WHY is a bubble like a bruise? Be­ cause it comes from a blow. Do NOT lie astonished at anything. This is a freak country. A WOMAN who goes to church to show her sealskin sacque is sacque-religioiia. SOME men want but little here below, but they want it in long strips, so to speak. SIIAKSPEARK'S "Seven Ages of Man" --Mess-age, lugg-age, saus-age, ramp­ age, marri-age, pareut-age and dot-age. A PITTSBURGH man made two unsuc­ cessful attempts to hong himself. He lutd probably been a Sheriff in his life­ time. A FATHER of three sons and .five daughters was asked what" family he had. The answer was: "I have three sons and they have each five sisters." "Mercy!" replied the interrogator, "sich a family!" A MEDITATIVE man was roaming through an anatomical museum, ana came across the skeleton of a donkey. "Ah!" he said in reverential awe, as ne adjusted his green spectacles, "we are indeed fourfufly and wonderfully made." AN Irishman and Scotchman were once talking alxmt the sun and moon; the latter asserted that of the two lum­ inaries the sun was the most useful. To this Pat replied, "How can that be? for, sure, doesn't the moon shine when it's dark ? and the sun only makes his appearance when it's daylight, at any rate." "I HAVE no patience with a man who can't remember a thing no longer than it's being told him," exclaimed Jones, impatiently; "now, I can carry a thing in my mind a month, if need be. "You're a lucky dog, Jones," remarked Prendergast, quietly; "it isn't every­ body that lis so much room in his mind as you have, you know.", INE. Site was the prettiest girl, I ween, That mortal eyea had ever seen; Hev name was Annabel Christines Her bangs were curled with bandoline, Her cheekv were smoothed with vaseline. Her teeth were bruuhed with fine dentine. Her face WUH waehetl in coaline, Her gloved were cleaned with gasoline, She wore a dresa of grenadine, Looped o'er a xkirt of brilllanuns; Her petticoat was bombazine, Her foot was bhod by a kid bottine, 4 Her wounds were healed with oo«m0Hn% She sailed away from Mnncatlne, In a ship they call a brigantlne. She flirted with u gay marine m Till they reached the Reimblic Argentine, Where they were married by the dean. And livid on oleomargarine. A GRAY hair w$s espied among tbe raven locks of a charming young lady. "Oh, pray pull it out!" she exclaimed. " If I pull it out ten more will come to the funeral," replied the one who had made the discovery. "Pluck it out, nevertheless," said the dark-haired dam- sol. " It's no consequence how many come to the funeral, provided they aa come in black.*' " I SHALL feel lonely, dearest, when you are gone," said a young husband, as lie put his wife on a railway carriage far the seaside, and clinging to her fondly, h waited the signal of departure. "Char­ lie, dear," she answered, reassuringly, "I have provided against all that. Mamma will come and stay with y ou until I return; and, as she's very timid, you'll remain at home of an evening and keep each other company." THE baker's cart was standing by the door, minus the baker. Little cherub climbed up, and, looking into the boxes, ieasted her eyes on cookies and jumblea innumerable. "Oh! I'se a good mind to take a cookie!" "But that would be very wrong," said the nurse, reproving­ ly. " The baker won't see me. " "But God will," solemnly said the nurse. know; but he'll never tell the baker." A FASHIONABLE young man had ac­ quired considerable fame as a musical bore on the violin. One night, at a so­ cial gathering, he announced that he w«« going to send for a violin and draw ft few of Beethoven's immortal symphonies out of it, as it were. To his amazement, all the gentlemen present volunteered to go for the fiddle, and up to date none at Uiem have got back with it. For dis­ persing a crowd no implement of war has yet been invented to rival the fiddle. " ABOVE all things in this world," said a youth who stands on street corners for a living, "do I value the love of my dear mother." " God bless you, young man, for those noble sentiments " said ft missionary. " Having so much Jove and respect for a mother, you need no other recommendation to successful men who will aid you." "Yes,*" continued the young man, " mother feeds me, clothes me, does my washing, and has been doing it for twenty-five years. I don't know what I should do without her." Mixed. An inquisitive boy who had been taught to lielieve in the resurrection of the iden­ tical atoms which constituted each indi­ vidual during life, said to his mother: < " Ma, will all the heathen emne up when it comes resurrection time?" " Yes, my son." "And then those "Mfrifrnarirfi; will they turn up, too?" " Certainlv, my son." " Well, when them cannilml heatheiw what's been feedin' on missionary, gel resurrected, and them missionaries what's been eat comes around and want* to get resurrected, things is goin' to be wone mixed than the presidential election, hey, ma?" "It is time you went to bed, my son.** ' ---- v' SPEAKING of the different ages ol this world, to what age do peddlers belong t The pack age,

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