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wrg ftoiuflralet I. VAN SLYKE, Editor ami Publisher. J £ McHENRY, ILLINOIS. SBNATOB EDMUNDS, daring all the years lie has been in the Senate, has never, it is said, revised a single speech for publi­ cation. He never uses notes, and knows exactly what he means ore he riaes from his chair. THB Philadelphia Timet remarks: "Mr. Vanderbilt may not know it, but he is to-day the most eloquent and effective champion in the land of the absolute control of inter-State coihmerce by the Federal Government." JUDGE THOMAS FOSTEB, a prominent lawyer of Calhoun, Ga., committed a sort of double suicide in his stable, first drinking two vials of laudanum and then shooting himself twice in the pit of the stomach. Business troubles was the cause of the act. A NUMBER of leading citizens of New York have organized a company to erect at the corner of Broadway and Thirty- ninth street a place of amusement mod­ eled after the European summer theater. It will be opened in April with a series oi concerts directed by Herr Strauss, of Vienna. THE fact has just been developed at Lincoln, CaL, that a leading citizen named Singleton was murdered and robbed, four years ago, by an old friend named Niles, With whom he crossed the plains. The body was thrown into an abandoned well on Niles' farm, and sus­ picious circumstances led to the excava­ tion of the skeleton. A MONUMENT has been raised in the Shipka pass to commemorate the battles which were fonght there during the late war between Russia and Turkey. It is said to be a worthy memorial of the thousands of lives, many of them the lives of the bravest men in the opposing armies, which were lost in the tremend­ ous struggle of Suleiman to force the pass. NEW YOBK people complain of the the tree district, and the lighting of fires for cooking or other purposes Is also prohibited. No one will be allowed to break a twig, and beasts of burden will not be permitted to enter within the prescribed limits. Should oxen, sheep, goats or other pasturage cattle be found there they will be confiscated absolutely. VAST and destructive grasshopper swarms have been ravaging parts of Turkey and of the Russian Caucuses. In the latter region 100,000 rubles were appropriated for distribution in the shape of reward for the destruction of the laavse. In the region about Smyrna the entire population had to turn out for the destruction of the pests. In the district about Angara all shops were closed by proclamation of the Governor for three days, and the population was set to work in the fields. Beside this, prayets were offered in all the mosques, and every inhabitant was required to turn in to the Government a certain quantity of the larvae, to be burned ^n pits dug for the purpose. These grasshoppers, or locusts, sure said to come from Persia. THE London Telegraph, at a recent date, says : Thirty tons of human bones have just been landed at Bristol from Turkey. Picked up in the immediate neighborhood of Plevna, carted thence to Rodosto-they now go to enrich En­ glish soil. T^o those who do not give to such a matter much consideration, it may be well to mention that thirty tons of bones mean the skeletons of 30,000 men. They do not include, probably, many stones or pieces of wood, but in all likelihood are the actual bones of the gallant men who, from the inside and the outside of the wonderful earthworks which Osman Pasha made, fought as hard as they could for the nations to which they belonged. The battles of September, 1877, alone contributed nearly all this number of skeletons ; but there were other terrible fights in July and August, and, again, when the place surrendered. Each contest furnished its quota of bones, and of these a large proportion now comes to England. It is appalling to think what was the actual loss of human life in the space between the Danube and the amount of mutilated silver coin in cir-1 -®gean. But one tliujg is certain ; the culation in that city, but are probably | thirty tons of skeletons landed at Bristol unaware of the means by which it gets there. It is not freely circulated in the other great cities, and is sold to the coin-brokers, and by them it is sold to the pawnbrokers, who pay it out to the poor people who are their customers, and are not in a condition to refuse to take it. Gov. ROBERTS, of Texas, exercises a personal supervision of the prisoners in the State penitentiary. Most of them, he says, are young men from the' North­ west, East and North, who, having strayed from home restraints, have fall­ en into bad company and got into do not at all adequately represent slaughter that took place. the The Lecture Platform. The taste for lectures pure and sim­ ple has departed to a very great extent. Only the very best are in demand, and those at much-reduced prices. Theo­ dore Tildon made only about SI 0,000 last year, while the year after the trial he made $40,000. Beecher, Higginson, and other $100 men are quite willing to lecture ior--$50 now. They recognize the fact that the prices have come down, and that $50 is pretty fair pay for half an hour's talk that they can repeat often. The scientific lecturers and the lecturers on scholarly topics are growing less in trouble. He teUs them that good con- demand. One scientific lecturer, ^d a , , , „ . , ° ... man of reputation too, found in a West- duct will shorten their terms, and, if j ern town only one auditor, whom he in- they behave themselves, pardons them j vited out with him to take some oysters. out. IT costs $20 to secure a front seat when Patti sings, but the energetic and enterprising managers of Paris theaters have hit upon a scheme by which peo­ ple who cannot afford to pay such fancy prices can catch snatches of the priqia donna's songs at a cheaper rate. Tele­ phone lines are utilized for this purpose, and stations established where a five- minutes' listen can be secured for a franc and a half. Many pattonize the new system, and express themselves as well satisfied with what they hear. THE statistics of railway construction It is not an unusual thing for lecturers to find only two or three persons in the audience. People are afraid to pay out their money on unknown lecturers. Some idea of the class of men who sometimes get on lecture' committees may be formed from the fact that one of them sent for an engagement with Dr. Edwin H. Chapin several months after his death. Another wanted to employ Rutherford B. Hayes, under the mistake that he was the same person that was advertised as Robert Bruce Hayes. As a rule, the number of female as­ pirants for employment in winter enter­ tainments is increasing enormously. The female readers are legion. Many of them have little capital of either mon­ ey, good looks, experience or talent. HlSTOBICAt. , , They think they can jump intoa good liv- m India show a very rapid rate of prog- j ^ kstautly. JTheAave no idea of the ress. The total length of lines open ; coat Gf preparing a lecture tour, or that on the 1st of January last was 9,325 miles, of which no fewer than 838 miles had been added during the year. This remarkable activity appears to have been well maintained, for between the committees will not waste their money on unknown persons. It is surprising how many illiterate persons think tl ey can read. They generally are fortif ed with profuse puffs, written, by tl eir teachers--so-called professors of elccu- date mentioned and the close of the I ^on--whose names would not diaw financial year (1880-81) 266 more miles i enough of ** au(hence pay lh# had been opened, and numerous impor- i tant railway undertakings are in prog­ ress, among which is the extension of , the Punjab Northern railway «o Pesha- , ~ wur. I 8118- , The tendency now is to lighter en­ tertainments than formerly. People want to be amused rather than instruct- MRS. SARAH DAVIS, of Washington, who died a short time ago, was the only person who ever shook hands with all the Presidents of tihis country except President Garfield. She was in her 94th year, and was born in the district near Bladensburg. Her husband, John Da­ vis, who died about twenty-five years ago, had charge of the navy yard during the War of 1812, and took all the records other valuable documents of the Government to Montgomery county in a wagon to save them from being destroyed "by the British. THE New York Sun is alarmed to find that of the 447 female graduates of the Hartford High School, only 147 have married. The Springfield Republican says the explanation is easy. The edu­ cation makes woman more independent, more able to earn her own living and •enjoy it and less disposed to take np with the risks of married life, until just the right party comes along. She is less likely to " throw herself away " in the idea that she must get married anyhow. The Sun did not comment upon the fact that the whole number of deaths among these 447 is only twenty-five, which illus­ trates the sanitary value of education. grades spec; tbut in some way or other the people want to be made to laugh. The days of the lecture platform as a public educator seen to be passing away. In the same way that they are often aspirants to tne stage who pay good round sums to the managers to bring them out, there are aspirants to the plat­ form and reading desk who invest capi­ tal and fail. There are now so many good per­ formers that a new one has an up-hill task. Committees are on the alert for variety. Conservative town, sthat form erly would only have staid lecturers, now demand a little touch of drama, some comic business, a little magic or an op­ eretta. A stranger who goes into a town un­ known generally loses hi« advertising and other expenses. People don't like to buy 'a pig in a poke' in lecturing any more than in anything else.--Exchange. So GREAT has been the destruction of •cedar trees in the famous Lebanon for­ est that they have dwindled into a mere thicket, numbering only 400 trees. Rustem Pasha, the Governor General, has taken steps to arrest the disgraceful vandalism from which they suffer at the "hands of travelers. He has issued a special ordinance forbidding the erection 4)f toils or other kinds of shelter within ^1 m. Asylums for Romeos and Juliets. Do you suppose for one moment thai a youth who is perhaps earning twenty- five or thirtv-tive dollars per month, anc who has had little perhaps, or no, experi­ ence in society, is fitted to become a hus­ band ? Why, the question is absurd, and doesn't admit of argument. On tht other hand, is a school girl, who has not yet tasted the pleasures that balls, par­ ties and sociables alone afford, fitted tc shoulder the responsibilities of a mother' Children who want to get married arc crazy, and they should be treated like crazy'people. My plan is for every State iu the Union to be provided with a lovt asylum, officered by efficient and honor­ able persons, selected by the Governor. The asylum should be sustained by tax­ ation. When young people are deter- mined to marry, one, or both, of then: should be confined in the asylum uut* thev have entirely recovered from tht determination.--New Orleans Times. THE way thev take the census in In­ dia is to count the Datives on one square mile and then multiply by all the figures a date will hold. FUMIOATKHI with brimstone is of Ro­ man origin. THE Gauls loved to decorate their hel­ mets, swords and buckles with coraL A CROWN of red-hot iron was an an­ cient punishment few rebels and regi­ cides. AT POMPEII, oombs have been found exactly like the modem t fine tooth kind. } THE Saxon groat-great coin was so called because it was the largest English coin then known. THB elephant was put upon the ooins of Cspsar because that animal was called Ccezar in Mauritauria. THE first establishment for the manu­ facture of straw bonnets was started in Somers, Conn., in 1830. THE most common measure of capacity among the Romans was the Amphora, nearly nine English gallons. THE coffin of Lambert, the celebrated "great man," was four feet and a half wide and two feet and a halt deep. THE first town on the Aroostook, Maine, was Maysonville, settled in 1820 by a few men from Newi Brunswick. BY THE Saxon laws twelve years of age was fixed as the earliest possible devel­ opment of the legal understanding. THE original use to which Boston Common was put was for a pasture for cattle and parade ground. It was called Centry Field. THE Greek word for horse-shos first occurs in the ninth century Horses were then only shod in time of frost or for especial occasions. HUTS, instead of tents, were used by the ancient English soldiers, as the modes of warfare consisted chiefly in sieges and standing* camps. COATS of arms and heraldry were in­ troduced into England in 1100. The arms of England and France were first quartered by Edward III. in 1358. IN ELIZABETH'S time "repeater" watches were so rare that some rustics took one that they heard for the devil, and threw it out of the window with the tongs. THE first silver money coined in Rome was A. U. C. 484. The mint, was iu the temple of Juno Moneta, which circum­ stance occasioned the origin of our word money. A CIRCULATING library in the Middle Ages may seem surprising. In 1342 a law was framed in Paris compelling all public booksellers to keep books to lend out on hire. BUHL work, the process of inlaying by use of the saw, derives its name from a French workman, Boule, who invented and carried it on during the reign o{ Louis XIV. AUG? nK'S used a luCuMiuuduiu ' bofek, in which he made notes of what he wished to say, but he punished, as a spy, one Pinarius, for taking notes at public ovations. UNDER the early laws of the Athenians a false witness was to be thrown head­ long from the capitol. Treading down another's cornfield at night was punish­ able by death. THE term Quaker was first applied to the sect in derision. When George Fox, the founder, was brought before the magistrate he told him to quake before the word of the Lord. BOMBARDS were large ale barrels, and the vessels used to carry beer to soldiers on duty, from whence came bombard- man, for one who carried about provi­ sions, corrupted by the sailors into bum- boat DURING a storm in Vermont, in 1870, the lightning struck a horse in pasture, burning off his hair, or pulling it out, cutting a hole two inches long in hie head and throwing off his shoes. The horse recovered. A Cornfield Protected by Rattlesnakes. An octogenarian, of Dresden, had been troubled, during corn-planting time, by the crows stealing the corn planted. The usual resort to scarecrows was a failure even, and nothing seemed to keep them away. One day old Rube Davis, the late famous rattlesnake man of Lake George, was making a visit to the Dresdenite. The latter was telling old Rube of his trouble with the crows, when the rattlesnake man asked what the Dresdenite would give him if he would furnish protection to his corn. A sum was named, which old Rube accepted and took his departure, prom­ ising to be on hand the next corn-plant­ ing time. Nothing was thought of it until the next season, when old Rube put in an appearance. He took from his pocket six live rattle­ snakes, which he handled with as much freedom as if they had been kittens. Die old fellow then asked when corn was to be planted, and, being informed that the job would be finished that very day, he Repaired to the cornfield. There he made six little houses or dens, covering them with flat stoned. These dens were situated in different parts of the corn­ field. The cawing of the crows could be heard, the birds seeming to be on the watch for the men's departure. Old Rube then placed a snake in each little den, and uttering words to the reptiles, which he always aaid they could under­ stand, the men left the field. They had scarcely passed through the opening in the stump fence before the air was filled with crows, all bound on a foraging expedition. The men watched the result at a distance. Down went the crows into the cornfield, when the work of slaughter began. The snakes left the dens and, cautiously approaching the unsuspecting birds, they were soon enabled to wind their horrible folds about the crows, necks, when the work of killing them was almost instantane­ ous. Sometimes a crow would raise a few feet from the ground, with the snake tightly bound about its neck, when it would soon tumble to earth, dead. The work of destruction went on, however, and before the sun set that night the snakeB killed seventy-three crows. We defy anybody to tell a more remarkable snake story than this. Snake, stories are very thick nowadays, but we are sorry to say that most of them are very thin.-- Whitehall Times. How to Learn the Art of Kissing. Kissing may be said to be like swim­ ming. The kisser must abandon him­ self wholly to the business--close his eyes, as it'were, and trust to the natural buoyancy of his body to recover himself after the ecstatic plunge. A girl takes to kissing as kittens take to sport, with a natural aptitude for the quintessence of its delight. Under the tuition of any girl the most bashful youth soon learns the operation of the lips, and, once learned, the art is never lost. No' rules can be given for the pursing or the plat^ ing of the lips. The suggestion that it might be practiced before the mirror is not worth considering, as there is an in­ tellectual process in the artistic develop­ ment of a kiss which cannot be stimu­ lated or invoked save under the eye of the owner of the lips that invite and un­ der the tender spell that transforms those same lips into the one object in all the world that the lover yearns to taste. The sign of a right sort of a kiss is un­ mistakable. There is a mounting color in the cheek and a softer glitter in the eye, that tells the story with youth or maid. There is a story that the mustache plays a leading part in the perfect kiss, but this must be a matter of option, as Byron--who was so fond of kisses, longed to have all the kissable lips in the world made into one mouth that he might kiss, it--had no mustache. Julius Cseaar, too, who dropped into kissing as a relaxation, had no beard. Indeed, the chronicles of kissing would probably show that the beardless gallants, whose kissing made the happiness of the Queens of old, were none the less effec­ tive with lips that knew no beard. Deaf Hunter's Politics. Daring the war they had down in Florida a shrewd old fellow known as " Deaf Hunter." Everybody knew him. He was deaf as a post, and through his dealings and his slirewdness he managed completely to hide his sympathy for either party during the war. It was sus­ pected, however, that ho «M with the Confederates at heart. Every means had been tried by the Union officers to procure from him some admission of preference, but of no avail. When reduced to a corner, he never lacked an expedient to get himself out. ! But one day a Union captain put up a ; bet that he could tap him and get his 1 secret. He accordingly went up to j Hunter's and skirmished around, but , pot one hint could he get. He would be deaf to questions that were unpleasant, and the inquirer was baffled. At last there came two large bull-dogs into his store, fierce fellows, and exactly alike. " Fine dogs, those," yelled the inquis­ itor in his ears. " Yes," was the reply. "What are their names ?" in the same loud tone. " Wall," said the old man, "I call one Beauregaurd and t'other MoClellan." "You do," shouted the inquirer; "which one do you like the best?" "Hey?" queried Hunter, putting down his ear. ? "Which do you-like the best?" " Oh, wall," said he, with a twinkle in his eye, " both on 'em is as ugly as the devil." The Captain paid the bet. The next day he was drinking in Hun­ ter's store, and, taking advantage of the old man's deafness, proposed a toast. " Here's to old Hunter, the two-sided old villain ; mav he be kicked to death by mules, and iiis body be sunk in the sea a hundred fathoms deep. May no Erayer be said over him, and may his lind soul wander rayless through all eternity." The toast was drunk with great glee, in which the old man joined. •4 The same to yourselves, gentlemen^" said he, " the same to yourselves." Of course he had not heard a word that was said!--San Francisco Argo­ naut. Settling the War. In the winter of 1864 Pony Mountain, in the Shenandoah Valley, was full of game, and Federals and Confederates used to shoot squirrels and trap rabbits when off picket duty. Care was taken to avoid each other, but many col­ lisions occurred and more than one poor fellow's bones are bleaching under the dark pines to-day. One day a member of the Sixth Michigan Cavalry encountered a " Johnny " face to face as they both turned a thicket. Both had guns on their shoulders, and both were too sur­ prised to speak for some time /Thej^the Confederate yelled out: "Say, you Yank, what are you down here for ?" " To put down the rebellion." " Ye can't do it, nohow." " Bet you $10 we can." "Look here," said the "reb," as he came closer and put down his gun to in­ dulge in gestures, " I'll play ye a game of euchre to see Which side is going to whip." This was agreed to, and a pack of cards was produced. The " Yank " got the first deal and made a point. The " reb " took the second and made a march. At tlio next deal the score was even, and pretty soon they stood four to [our. The play was careful, but the Confederacy had the winning cirds, and as the "Johnny ' tjok the last trick with an ace he jumped up and yelled : " I knew it--I knew it. Now Yank, are ye squar ?" "»I am." " Then go back and stop this 'ere war 'cording to agreement and mount yer critter and go home. WIJO ! Rah fur me ! I knew there must he some way to settle this dog-gone war if I could only git beyond the pickets !" A Drop of Water. We read frequently of the drowning of good swimmers, who suddenly sink in the water without any apparent cause. The common explanation of such an ac­ cident is that the swimmer is seized with cramps; but an English naval officer offers a different solution of the Ehenomenon. He bases his theory on is own experience. His ship was lying for a long time off Aden harbor, and it was the practice for cricketing parties to swim from the vessel to the shore every eveuiug, having their clothes sent in a small boat. Of course there was a race to see who would get to the beach first. The writer in the course cf a sharp struggle for the lead opened his mouth to breathe, and some of the spray flying in the wind got into his throat mid took the passage down the trachea. "I could neither," he says, "get any breath in, nor any out, and I soon began to feel that I was dying on top of the water. There must have been a dozen men close to me, but I could not speak, much less call to them. I kept swimming on for the shore. In about thirty seconds my senses began to leavo me. I ceased to swim, and my legs went dowu, when luckily for me they touehed the bottom ; a violent jump helped me to oough up the drop of water. I staggered on shore and fell quife exliaus-ed on the beach, much to the surprise cf all the men with me." It is the opinion of this gentleman that many fatal accidents to swimmers are due simply to a drop of water iu the wind-pi]>e. A conclusive proof that they are not jlue to cramp is a fact that a mail rescued within two minutes of sinking in this mvsterious manner is beyond all hope of resuscitation Monuments In Mammoth Cave. To the rude monuments which have been erected in the Mammoth cave to the memory of distinguished men, and which now number nearly 300, some of them reaching from floor to roof, one in honor of Gen. Bumside was added on the day of his burial by a party of visi­ tors from Provideice, R. I. These rough piles of stone are an impressive feature of the cave. A LITTLE glycerine added to gum or blue is a great improvement, as it prevents either becoming brittle. It also prevents gtanmed labels from hav­ ing a tendency to curl up when being written on. •i FACTS IN FIGURES* Report of the Illinois T.nbor tturoAW •B the PretMim Condition of Work­ ing-men-- A ('haptcr ra ('oinninniin --The Avcrave Earalap ui ex- pease* of Varlooa Clam of Artft- Hum Tabulated--A Pica (or Co-ope* ration. [From the Chicago Time*.] The Times last winter, it will be remem­ bered, presented a considerable amount of matter compiled from advance sheets of the first report of the Itareau of Labor Statistics. It was given out then that it would be com­ pleted and presented to the Governor and members of the General Assembly, then in «t!»s;on, within a very short time. It was not done, and the General Assembly adjourned without having the pleasure of perusing this interesting report. There then appearing no wpecial object in pushing forward the report, it was laid aside to give room for the insur­ ance and crop reports, claimed by their authors to be works which the people were eagerly de­ manding above everything else. The report ia a completed form is now ready, and will be issued in a short time. In speaking of communism in Illinois the document says : The socialistic movement was first organ ized at Chicago, in this State, in 1873 Siaot then, although known at different times by dif­ ferent names, the party has existed. The first name assumed was " Social Democrats," the next, the " Workingmen's Party of the United States," and the last, by which the party is now known, the "Socialistic Labor party." As a political factor its greatest strength was at­ tained in the spring of 1879, when npward of 11.000 votes were polled for the party's candi­ dates, although at no time were there more than 700 enrolled members. The votes were drawn from the working classes generally, as the plat­ form indorsed and advocated the measures usu­ ally sought for by trades unionists, such as higher wages, shorter working tinie, abolition of child labor, factory and workshop inspection, etc. Such demands and objects, however, form no portion of the socialistic creed, are re­ pudiated l>y the most honest and fearless of the socialistic leaders, being bv them denounced M " patent medicines," and were iutrodneoil and used merely to attract the favorable attention and secure the votes of the working classes. This, from various causes, the lattvv have since learned, and therefore the political force and power of the socialists have decreased to such an extent as to be no longer felt. It may bo best to inquire^ for a more thor­ ough understanding ol the subject: 1. What is communism ? 2. What is socialism V 3. What relation do they bear to cach other, either in principles or adherents ? 1. Communism, pure and wimple, means a oommunity or commonalty of property, regard­ less of its producers or the methods of its pro­ duction. It means that needs, regardless of deeds, shall be rewarded. The fallacy and in®' quity of communism, under any phase of civil izatibn, requires no refutation; the poverty, retrogression and barbarism which would re­ sult therefrom are manifest to all thinking men. 2. Socialism advocates the control of the in dustries of the people by the Government; means the •' nationalization " (forcible acquis­ ition) of the machinery of locomotion, of com­ munication, of production, of distribution, and of the products of industry during the process of "distribution" by the Government--means that all the agents of production and distribu­ tion, and all the products themselves, shall be controlled and owned by a coercive political combination (the State), the products to be distributed to the producers in such manner and in such proportions as may be agreed up­ on by that same coercive combination ; for, they aay, " If this is a Government of the peo­ ple," by the people and for the people, and if the most important function of the Govern­ ment is the protection of its individual citizens, they ought to have a right to ask that the pow­ er of owning and controlling the capital of the nation, which is the accumulated labor of the nation, and which directs and controls the in­ dustry of the nation, should be in the hands of the nation in its collective capacity, and not in the hands of individuals, to be used by them for their own private gain and profit" S. There is no necessary couuection between socialism and communism, further than tbat both advocate coercive industrial co-operation, the absorption of everything by the State, and the ultimate crushing out of individuality. In reality, indeed, communism is but an extension of tht* doctrine of socialism. Socialistic pamphlets aud speeches would lead to the belief that the world's moral condi­ tion is not only stationary, but retrogressive. No grosser deception could exist A man must be blind to the teachings of history who can­ not see that wrong, injustice and oppression aie gradually but sureiy passing awav ; that in the daily life, social aud political, of the workiiimnan, he was never bel'oiv so respected or sell-respecting as to-day; that the moral sentiment which rose in arms against Southern slavery because of its iujusiice, anU which cries out in denunciation of Irish rack-rants because of their ineqnity, was utterly lacking, even 100 vear» ago. Indeed, all who are not blinded by ignorance, or pilose opinions are not wai j>ed to suit *partieu1ar theories, can plainly see that the world'&pthicJil progress has kept full pace with its material improvements ; that the "good old days " aro shadows; and, compared with other times, the golden age is here. But, were the statements of the socialists true--were it, indeed, a fact that private greed violates justice to such a degree that the moral status of the world is retrograding--what rem­ edy can they offer? State control! If greed, rapacity and dishonesty characterize the peo­ ple individually, how can a " collective " cen­ tral agency blot out these vices ? How can a state I*J other than as the units of which it is composed Y The state, at best, but acta upoD and enforces the sentiments of the people, and the people " in their collective capacity, inten­ sify rather than obliterate dominant Imperfec • tions, and, though the established system be perfect in detail, yet will the viciousness of the agents and the factors degrade it to & level with the general conduct of society. Indeed, to suppose that governments can create perfect conditions or perfect men, is an absurdity. Governments are made by men ; not men by governments. All socialistic reasoning in H>i« respect is the sheerest folly. Causes and effects are so confounded as to create a chaos--as to be a veritable case of " bricKs without straw." Now, much as capital--or the private owner­ ship of capital--is railed against by socialists, yet it is absolutely indispensable to a progress­ ive civilization. Without capital, fixed smd movable for use in reproduction, barbarism would soon result By capital alone can a dense population be maintained; by capital alone it civilization rendered possible. Socialists insist that this necessary capital should be in posses­ sion of societv--in possession of the nation " in its collective capacity"--and not controlled by private ownership. It mav be well to inquire, however, how capital has been and is now be­ ing accumulated? Is it not an almost unrea­ soning instinct in man, -acquisitiveness--an hupulse sometimes pursued even at the expense of the desires ? And is it natural or reasonable to suppose that this impulse or instinct can be replaced by some other agency equally opera­ tive ? True, benevolence may in some slight degree compensate; but, since the world's progress lias thus far been retarded by a scarci­ ty of capital, it is evident that the master passiou of individual accumulation is still requisite to supply the material motive powet industry. It may be insisted that the feeling for appealed to is coarse and base, but it is at any rate efficacious ; it does lead to habitual and systematic saving, and furnishes the world witb the basis for a progressive civilization. Nothing is more positive, indeed, than that the capital of the nation, if "nationalized," would rapidly disappear. It would never have been accumu­ lated nad it not been for the knowledge of iti possessors of their right to keep it and enjoy iti fruits. It can not be preserved, much less in­ creased, by any feebler motive. The need of the industrial classes, above all things else, is self-restraint; is knowledge whereby the means they acquire shall be prop­ erty and economically utilized; is more self- conscious independence, Now, if self-restraini be needed, how shall it be acquired ? By re­ moving all necessitv therefor--bv thrustiiie on its sphere of action, and replacing it by an artificial agency called the state ? Or shall we not rather be guided by nature's laws and con­ vinced by nature's teachings, "that strength vfiHl show itself ontv where strength is called for--that an undeveloped capability can be de­ veloped only under the stem discipline of necessity?" It must be kept ever active, evei strained, ever inconvenienced by its inoom- Sleteness. Under this treatment it will, in ipse of time, attain efficiency; and what was once its impossible task will become the source of a healthy, pleasurable and desired excite­ ment. State interference obviously cannot aid self-restraint or self-reliance. Indeed, by such interference adaptation to better conditions is checked and the development of necessary faculties prevented. Anv agencv used as a prop for man's weakness but prevents the acquisition of strength. Anything which ren­ ders self-restraint unnecessary fits mankind foi a state of eternal babyhood. Is the State capable of managing the indus­ trial iuterest* of the people ? Are the people " in their collective capacity " wise enough, OJ honest enough, for mob managenMOt? Polit- tcai movements usually lower men's conduct below society's recognized leveL What would be deemed contemptible in the social sphere is too often tolerated, even admired, in the political. Most of the duties now assumed tW the Government are but poorly pferformej. Fraud, jobbery and corruption are daily charged against it. Having failed to perform well its part in the limited sphere now allotted to it, why should an extension of its power* and responsibilities be granted? Some of the objections against "wjniiim nu be summarized as follows: 1. Because, reasoning from effects, not causes, it aims to build a perfect organization with imperfect materials; to secure an equit­ able agent composed of units confessedly un­ just, and have such agent react upon and change the habits, morals and eliminate the vioen of the very units by which said agent was established and is maintained--a more brain­ less, senseless scheme than Unit clutcned at by the perpetual-raotkm visionary. 2. Because those v. ho most "need self-control, self-reliance and sobriety must acquire those essential attributes of true manhood by th • in­ convenience snd suffering caused by their pres­ ent non-posBession. The method of acquiring the complete development of a faculty is not by removing the necessity for its use, 3. Because the genius of the ago points to less government, not more, leaving social forces to guide humanity in its march to higher, nobler conditions. The Anglo-Saxon seeks room for individuality, and is justly jealous of an over- towering, all-absorbing inquisitorial state. 4. Because by a» large capital only can a dense population be maintained, or civilization pro­ gress, and this capital is accumulated bv the acquisitive instinct of man in his individual, and not in his " collective" capacity. Anv interfer­ ence which would render less intense the ac­ cumulative desire--which has not ye! furnished the necessary material basis for reproduction- would but render a dense population impos­ sible, retard all progress, ana turn the civiliz­ ation of to-day into the barbarism of past ages. 5. Because the people "in their collective capacity," as already shown in the quoted ex­ tract, are incapable of performing the duties imposed upon them. Proving, however, that the schemes of social­ ists are visionary and dangerous by no means proves that the condition of the working peo­ ple is what it should be. Co-operation is the only road to independence for the many, and when intelligence, sobriety and moralitv are more prevalent among the industrial classes neither fears nor doubts need exist as to their emancipation from capital--their emancipation from themselves. The following are the rates of wages paid in the different industries, so far as can be deter­ mined by the data in the possession of this bureau : A mount# tameit per day. Bricklayer* .$4. no tc $3.M Blacksmiths and helpers 1.75 to 4.01 Boxwakers 1.25 to 3.5t Butcher* 1.Ml to 8 <K Osrjx :.t«rs 3.00 to 3.M <'iK»r-ni«kers 1.25 to 2.5C <%;!r-j>acker8 1.75 to a.'iT I'ooptirs 1.50 to %!H ClotliuiK-cuttera 2.30 to R.0C Furniture-workers and joiners..... ... 1.80 to 4.f>( Onsfitt rs 5.00 to 5.01 Haddiers and collar-makers ...... 1.75 to ;f.0( Iron molders 8.00 to 4.01 Machinists 1.75 to 5.00 leather* 2.00 to U.51 Lithographers 2.50 to SMK Plumbers..." 2.50 to r-.OC Printers S.IK) to 5.0C PrepsimiD.. 8.00 to 6.00 Miooimikors 1.5a to 4.0n Silver-xiidcrs 2 «*) to fi.Ot' Tailors 1.60 to 4,>'f Tinners and sheet-Iron workers 1.T5 to 4.Of t*tihoKtc!•* . _ :. 4>_5t) to 6.IX Wutchinakers and jewelers '....: 2 00 to ti.i t Under our system of laws, it is virtually a crimc to beloiig to a trades union, in that any numberof persons combining together to ntfeet the price of wages come under the statute re­ lating to conspiracv. The law in question waf first enacted iu 18A1, and was an outcome ol the violence and intimidation resulting from the coal-mining strikes of that period. The law is virtually a dead-letter; and, although tliew have been arrests made in tho last four years under it by eoinpiaiuis before Justices of tht Pt»ace, yet "no grand jury has acted uuder it since 1865. The report presents the following table ol earnings and expenses compiled from reports received from various tradespeople in the State V* m -BKFCXCT. Poor kttl« Joe, that frisked and pUyed ! With Mar sod Ethel ail the day. Now in the cold, cold ground is laid, ' Called by a iwplen fate away. He aerer did a person wion*--: He even kissed the band tbat His Hfe was like a little song. Without one harsh, discordant Upon this tiuy, grassy mound .. The sweetest, prettiest flow'rs will grew, And little birds will all around . Slag requiems to the sleeping-Jew Td rather be the dog that lies Beneath that mound, secure from Than that base thing in haasan guise Who toek the harmless creature's lif«k m<sm* mas staSiS, -III LI•£(>•'. .MJ" ill OOCCrATIOKS. : 1 : * ; '§• : ? !| 1* u. 11 tl 0 ? Carpenters 1 (Ml $687.4-1 $.142.1; i!lack«miths ... 32 mr.M 179.11 Engineers and machinist^..... 87 70i.y:> 667.tif Car-lmtiders 4 61!). 11 1D4 4.' Tinnt'rs 9 518.11 488.11 Hnniups-niakers 411.'.!") 411. 1 Hook Keepers 7 888.75 679.4V Painters n 4D0.95 476,47 Mar Me and stone outters........ ii 4fcU'l) 440. M Cigar-makers 7 474 ft! ;«i«.7* Mill' is 4 874.7.") Mill..-* Tuil'TH S M-VOt) .ii :i. a Wat ih makers 4 08.>.A> 661.61 Triii iiirs 32 7ISU7 7.VJ.37 Jtiii-ilaycrs ' 18 saani 481.61 Hlio< makers 11 43t>. >4 i:ts. it- Woli Vrs 14 MT.-lf- C.-.l'i net-makers j 71 Wjli.llll .148 Coopers H 31D.ll> 4-Ji.:e Piaft'>rers ; 7 ass..v> 8I7..17 Spinners and weavers 4 87A.V. 427..If Mtari-h-maker* .' 1 SOI) 0(1 MOO. IX Hiit.-i.i-rB 1 MX) IH> 200.1)1 liirtier* 1 900. OU IWi.llt Pap'r-inakers 1 400.01) Ku)iui™-inlll employes 7 «46.!H |">-!I.47 Meoliaiiicrt 7 55.1. a.1 M'l.VJa Bro. ir-maker*. 6 Telegraph o^M.-rators 11 4:|I.M1 Loroinotivr tiremen •A S87.3;i .r>.ni Rai!\r:iy employes. :w &IU.U7 En.ployes ii> olotliing factories.. •Hi 4J3.U8 47 V.* Kmp!o>en Ih ^min elevators •J •28MU 2*7.0, Farm hand* 17 -4-JtV T i liii.lW Di yiPRii and hostlers 4 705.701 Lalmrfrc 41*1.54 40:f.l I; Con! miners as a« 1.S2 :«j.I;V Abrogate. . . . . . . . .W.' *n.i.r).7jV)7«. Of those, '1 Ti ttuiuiios have earnings exceed­ ing e» (HHISOS and 83 fail to '* make both ends meet." • • t Lighting Stables. Very little thought is usually gtoftn to the proper position of windows in horse stables; and yet a strong light which shiues directly into the faces of horses has a tendency to weaken their sight. A common point for a window is in front of horses and considerably higher than their heads. Numerous instances can be had of the injurious effects of such windows, among which is that of an of­ ficer in the British army, who had pur­ chased a horse from a gentleman whose stable received all its light from win­ dows situated at the rear of the stalls. The horse was sound, and the officer was perfectly satisfied with his bargain; but at the end of three months the animid became suddenly "ground shy." An examination of her eyes showed that they were directed upward, an explana­ tion of which was had by the fact that the windows of her new owner's stable were above the head of the stall. A re­ moval to a stable which admitted light on all sides, removed this difficulty. Another proof of our assertion is given in the case of a farmer who had some fine horses which he kept in a stable lighted only by a small window in one side. The stable was so imperfectly lighted by this window that the door was kept open nearly all the time, when work was being done. The consequence was that nearly all of his horses had eyes of un­ equal strength ; and two of them became blind on the side which was toward the window.--American Stockman. THB Journal of Science says FTSTT IN order to account for the mysterious dis­ appearances of persons, now so common, a French writer suggests the existence of a disease not yet recognized, which, without any previous warning, suddenly resolves the patient into vapor. He even professes to have witnessed the disappearance of a friend with whom he was walking. A very simple considera­ tion overturns this hypothesis. We can scarcely assume that the disease causes the sudden vaporization of clothing, boots, keys, knives, money, trinkets, and all that the patient had about him at the time of his disappearance. Yet no one has ever found in ttie street a complete suit of clothes frum which the body of the wearer escaped. WHCN we advance, a little into life we find that the tongue of man create nearly all the mischief of the world. ; PITH IIDFOMST A ilrihxm nut brown made: A (iblmti A in a roaster. WHKN wild cattl&get loose, pAqple an apt to suffer from hist-steria. '"' '*"* t , To find a lawyer who charges obty'i ' "*** y"Vi nominal fee certainly is phenomenal. '1 CORN has gone up.--Exchange. 6FCL well, convert it into whisky aaid it will go down. . |̂ SOME one says that Hod Fellows are ^ not Masons, although approaching them in their work. "WHY don't you have some stile4!. about you," Baid the man itHo had looked along a mile erf barbed fence for * "rtt- an entrance. Art! " DON'T out," murmured a sleepy cua- tomer in the barber's chair, fresh from an all-night poker party--"don't cut; ^ let'em run."--Jhirdette. IF a two-wheeled vehicle is a bicycle, _ and a three-wheeled a tricycle, it does not follow that the one-wheeled is icycle. It is a wheelbarrow. No, Pauline, no; the article you saw, .+m headed " Walking Matches," did not re- . fer to engaged couples, although many of them "go as tli ey please." ^ *. A BRIDE is reported to have said: " 1 told all my friends to have my name put on my presents, so that if divorced George should not be able to claimr " them." «<t*| THERE must be a great deal of "bounce" **•.» about new-born babies if newspaper per- ^ sonals are to be credited. Those that are not " bouncing boys" are invariably _ "bouncing girls." INDIGNANT mother: ** Surely, yoii ' * don't mean this for a likeness of my son! Whyv the boy looks like an idiot." Pho-'«**» tographe*: " I'm very sorry, but I can't j§ help that, ma'am." , MOST women spend their lives in nob- bing the old tree from which Eve plucked * the fir-* fruit. And such is the attrae-5 tion ol ..iu fruit that the most honest woman is not content to die without having tasted it, " THE fact is," said Smith, rofodn^*#II matically, "my heart goes out to the,^„| di"trGwSCd, T am nil hAiirf, " *' JT mi^gg you are," remarked Frogg, more in sor-,̂ i'* row than in anger ; "I know that you**-̂ . are always on the beat," < i*M' A COLORED cook expected company, some of her associates, and was at lossii to entertain her friends. Her mistre$s " Suzen, you must make an apology." ? j0 "Good Lord, Misses, I got no eggs, ¥•'*8 no butter, no nothing to make it with. ;vr • LAST summer she was eating green corn by gnawing it from a cob, when,,** her teeth^ became entangled with a corn silk. " Oh, dear," said she impatiently, " I wish when they get the corn made^^t they would pull out the basting threads!"* #| JONES says his wife is the most thrifty * woman he ever knew. "Why, sir," he8*** says, "she has made ten bedspreads during the last two years; made them * ^ herself, sir, out of the samples she eol-","^ lected in her shopping tours during that. ," t * time." Anil women are naturally afraid of a*u{* cow. " Madam," said the oleomargarine! *! dealer, when she uttered a shriek at dn*- covering that it was bogus butter she was handling, "Madam, .vou needn't Ml be alarmed. The oow it was made from is too dead to hurt yon." FOUR years ago a young man, without®* a cent on his back and only one suit of clothes to his name, entered Denver and • \ • begged his supper. Last week he eloped IT, ' *' with his employer's wife and $10,000 of ( ^ his cash. Close application to business, coupled with pluck and industry, wins, every time.--Norristown Herald. *** " SAT, boy!" sailed a woman te a foot lad, and admonishingly shaking ft'*'* fore-finger,' "what are you throwing#*#. water 011 that oat fur?" "The water won't hurt the cat's fur," replied the Z . < youth, and the woman, whose grammar - * ; was rebuked, said she didn't want any®*** of his "sass."--Norristown Herald. I* • "SMITH," said Jones the other day, " did you ever consider the differentia- • tion of absoluteness as compared with *^ the indissoluble absolute?" "No-o-o,"!^ said Smith, "don't think I ever did. ™ But did you ever consider why a pig's tail kinks to the left?" And that is the***® reason why Jones calls Smith a diaptb~>i*t anous ignoramus.--Oil City Derrick. 'WHILE an Idaho girl was sitting under t a tree, waiting for her lover, a grif_ bear came along and, approaching fram|, behind, began to hug her. But sher thought it was Tom, and so leaned baeki«* and enjoyed it heartily, and murmured " tighter," and it broke the bear all up^f* and he went away and hid in the forest for three days to get over his shame. " I must say that I very much dislike this ostentatious furnishing," remarked* the elderly Miss Pringlt. as she looked1 about her ia the new home of the Spank- ingtons. " Now look at that great, elaborately-framed mirror. I declare 1 can see nothing beautiful in it" " You shouldn't expect impossibilities, Miss Prinale." remarked Foarar. the villain. »•>«! Overran with (seats. The Island of Cyprus is overrun with goats. It is estimated that there are > 230,000 of these animals on the island, h and planting is almost useless on ac- ^ count of their ravages. "They carry no wool," says the St. James Gazette, "fur- nish only a bad meat, and hardly give ' "> more milk than the sheep, to which, however, they are preferred on account « of their feeding on ligneous vegetation, which the sheep reject. They are fed, . therefore, almost entirely at the expense * of the woods aud not only, it is stated, does the goat destroy the young freshly- grown plants, but it browses on th« t1| young branches of older tress. On the ^ southern mouutains, also, where the soil is loose, the goat is accused of in- i' creasing this looseness by scrambling p about, and thus injuring young plants, which are dragged down and torn away « by the falling of broken stones." . BatteradDu if; •'SS Buttermilk, a beverage whiah i> bs. coming quite fashionable in some of our f* . • s large cities, is not sufficiently appreci- Nf •'% ated in the country where it can be had * "? at its best Its medicinal properties can a scarcely be overrated. It is excellent # ;.fi' for dyspeptics, for nervous people, and for those who are troubled with sleep* lessness. Of course there are many • 'jj people who, not liking it wuuld perhaps # " be unable to acquire a taste for it, hut 4 for those who like it there is no drink which i& more whuhsao^i