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A COT "V = •iff; : tjeekto Uoses, leab me, sab, i Don't be crowdiu* quito so chill ituffdat lamp alone, too, pleas? sab, . ; EUc(ley'sgwine tote a fuss. Ifaok dat han' from off rav shoulder--»" P'raps ye t'ink I'm no-eount trash;] Wbery night ye get more bolder-- J / TInk yer smart to be so brash. ?• , K?hat a'jre praise dat CalUne foah? i|; If dat gaTrt so mighty dear; I*-ad dis kitchuml dar's d.i doah, ; i Court dat Calline--what do I kear? 3|mirfoIk<Mir--I--don't be lfftbln'-- HnOcr miff to r'ile a saint! Ain't, yer ghamei yoVelf for bleabln* Calline'* i au'eum when she hain't? ?'please now. don't irlt wuse'nobber-- Keep dar now--O. well, yer tarmmed--kiss mo! nebberl **0 fetop ais instep or I'll yell! j • %^e!l, if you ain't "tarned bashful! . 8;® Pshaw! who' 1 hab a man With skeoiif: i.5jp)i' r, now, don't <rit ober raahfal, ?S*, Fo' do f-.ck I'll box your ears. « Ulessmo! wh tdeuseof'sistta'. Case yer bouu' to hab yer way; w |t. < t afora < ue week--now lis en-- Say Jest one week fromd s day? arry now! an' what's dc harm In it? • Z^ekel Moses! why fo' shame! ow 1 blush--wi ll, If yer 'mruained-- (Dat bents Calline jes' i e same). J * Sft,» - THE GOURD. M BY WILI. I. VISCROit. •4^0 frallant knigh*, in days of old, • x* Sanit >my y flag-on songs; f^The mnnar. n drained his cup of gold - • And laughed h s peop.e's wrongs; tVli h {fob ets ilowli>r to the brim, , v Baechantos drank their wine, : Uut no ailming rosy rim • • Brings t-o. g to harp of mlna, •, 5The eo'dicr loves his old canteen, And founds in^onir lis praise. • !Then lover to • st? his mi8tress-qtie»B Xn wine bojfottfii lays; "Ihes ul of poesy'soutpourei- • Alike in cup and king. An 1 all for/et ih'» brown oUl gourd 'i'heydrai.kiiom atthcspr.ug. • There's hanp'neFS In banquet halls, ' n i Amid the bright and aray. Wh( re I rilliant s ing the soul enthrall* s 3 And wit ana wine liold sway, f i , 'stlii" all ti;c .oy in metn'rv stored i f i • No swei ur thought can,bring uhan theso of draughts 1 rom out thfcgoufd Wita N II, bes'de the spring. maj be racke«l by pain, wait. sorely cannot Jive ninch longer." A light of encouragement shone in his eyes as he said: "Ali, those are pleasant words." Alter this I fancie 1 that lie was not EO Testless. He continued to take med­ icine, to allay pain rather than to pro­ long life, he said. He wrote several strangely readable articles for the Cat FLsti. I didn't know, that with all mv experience in handling manuscripts, I have even seen a handwriting so pecu­ liar as his. A number of our citizens who saw it remarked its dissimilarity to any elurography they had ever beheld, and among them the old man was known as the enrious scribe. One evening as I was about to leave the office, 1 e followed me 1o the d< or. "Mr. Buck," sa;d he, "I think now that my time is short." He looked as though he wanted to smile, but that his poor old lips liad lost the movement necessary to the re­ flection of so pleasing an expression. "Why do you think so, Mr. With- ift i THE CURIOUS SCRIB| CHAPTER I. I will not bore you with a long story. I never told a long story. No one can fcfty that Eli Buck has ever told •tretched-out anecdotes to a gaping ^company. Modest? Well, I'm not ex­ actly bashful, but I haven't that solf- ' push to which many a man owes his [prominence. I was educated for a law­ yer. In fact, I practiced the devilish profession lor a short time. I say dev­ ilish because, during my short, and as Brete Hnrte would say, unhallowed ca­ reer as a lawyer, I was lined for con­ tempt of court and was mercilessly thumped by a witness who insisted that my pointless questions had led him un­ fittingly into falsehood. I shall not, however, discuss my career as a law­ yer. It is of myself as an editor that I desire to speak. From the time when my recollection seemed to come out of ft dark closet and flit, like a miller, around the candle of newly awakened existence, 1 have had a great fondness for news apers. My father often said that this predilection for hurried print would send me to the poor-house, but I found consolation in the reflection that considerable ingenuity would find long employment in urranging a poorer house than that which my lather Well, at last I secured a printing of­ fice. It was bought at a Sheriff's sale. At different times, many papers of dif­ ferent names, had been issued from the Worn hand-press, but waving aside the entire list of back-numbered christen­ ings, I>preforred to call my sheet the ^rk^nsaw Cat Fish. This was surely tip odd name--a kind of "odds-fish" name--and it was not, as an ignorant and . heartless wag, who never paid his sub­ scription. remarked, intended for ex­ clusive circulation among tho colored people. One day while I was hard at work, old men, very tall, with white hair id shrunken cheeks, oame into the of- §r- |v' I; I; 'I am very anxious to secure work." j (itid he. "1 am the oldest compositor ip the Slate. I have worn myself out OH daily papers, and now I wish to work on a weekly, where, instead of ' suffering under gaslight, I can spend * my nights in quiet. I ask for but little ** remuneration--a boarding place and a "* decent burial. Withers is my name." 1 looked at him to determine if his mind were right, but in his calm eye there was no traces of insanity. "My dear sir," said I, "do you expect .. to die so soon ?" "I have consumption," he replied, *nnd my course is nearly ran; but I am prepared. I regret no past; fear no 'lture." "It is trno that I need some one, for *|itli my short experience I am a very J|ow compositor, and it is true that I not able to pay an active printer." 'I can set up your paper with but little trouble. Say the word and I will take off my coat." CHAPTER II. The old man was an excellent com­ positor, wonderfully correct and un­ tiring in his effort to please. All day he would sit on a high stool, putting tip type with a regular click. His closest approach to a smile was the grim expression that crossed his face when he b nt himself over the "case" and coughed with a hollow sound. He kept a bottle of cod liver oil setting on the presB, and three times a day he jyould take up the bottle and drink #ith as much zest.it appeared to me, as Plough he were imbibing choice wine. 2 He slept in the office. One night §liile we were sitting by the stove, he oked up suddenly and asked: "What is your religion?" "1 do not belong to any church." "Which church do you favor ?" . "I favor them all, for they all point to a place of final rest." "And a final hell," said he. "Yes, the most of them believe In a liell, though not so strongly, I fancy, as iffiey did before education became so general." ; "Not so much as they did," he as­ sented. "Many of them do not now believe that hell is necessary to salva­ tion, but there must be a difference in the treatment cf good and bad souls. ; Suppose a man, who never harmed any one, should kill himself? Do you fliink his soul would find rest?" "That's a question upon which I would not like to express an opinion." "It is a question though," he contin­ ued, "which concerns me very much, ily suffering daily increases, but I don't TOo that I am approaching the grave * with that degree of acceleration which promises an early relief from pain. 1 have often thought that in my case, a pan would be justifiable in taking his Own life It looks to me as though I aim relentlessly tortured." • ; I hardly knew what reply to make, for I felt that the old man had cause to <bom plain, but after a few moments of reflection, I said: "Wait Mo matter how much you •* ; "I dreamed last night that \I dead. I thought that I lay down in quiet rest, like a tired man who goes to bed."' "I don't think that you should sleep here alone." "Yes," he replied. "The presence of anyone would disturb my meditations. I have and impression that I will die suddenly. An attendant would do no good, and would rob the first few hours of my long coveted sleep of that deep solitude which I desire shall surround me." As I was walking down the road to­ ward the house where I boarded on long time and short rations, I met 'Squire Duval. "Well, Buck," when I had stopped and shaken hands with him, "how is the curious scribe getting along?" "Almost cheerful in the thought that he is soon to leave Us," I replied. "Strange old man, mighty queer, but I don't think that his mind's altogether out o' whack. Him an' me agrees putty well here o' late, fur I've mightv nigh made a spiritualist outen him. 'Tuther day when he 'peered to be so dead sot on suicide, I said to him, says I, 'With­ ers, don't do it. If you do, your gradfe will be low. Live on, oven if you do suffer, an' jour grade will bo high.'" The next morning, as I was going to the office, I overtook the Squire near the place where I had met him the day before. "B'le\e I'll go with you," said he, "an' have a few moments' chat with the old feller." There was no lock on the office door, and lifting tho latch, we entered. Great Ood! The old man's body lay on the floor. His head, with the face turned toward us, lay on the imposing stone. A bloody--an awful sceno! On tho stone, near the head, lay a sheet of pa­ per covered with the old man's peculiar writing. Almost breathlessly, 1 read these words: "You will be surprised to find my head up here and my body on the floor. Yon do not see how it is possible for a man to cut off his head and place it where he chooses and then throw his body on the floor. It is sigular, but you see for yourself. How would you go about such a performance ? Ten t$ one you would fail." CHAPTER lit Never before or .since have I seen such excitement in a town. It was use­ less to deny that the note had been written by the curious scribe, but the old man could not have entirely sev­ ered his own head from his body, and, even could he have dene so, he could not have placed it on the stone. Why any one should have murdered him no one could conceive. Expert detectives came and spent days in looking for u clue, but went away puzzled. 'Squire Duval declared that the old man had been aided by bad spirits, in the execu­ tion of the bloody design, yet this, while it may have found ready sup porters among people who believed in supernatural agencies, was ridiculed by the Coroner and laughed at by the jury., Some time previous to the arrival of tho old man, I had incurred the mortal enmity of a fellow named Givens. This soulless wretch, biding his time, swore out a warrant for my arrest, charging mo with the murder of tho curious scribe. Of course I was indignant, but I soon paw that the people paid but little attention to my protestations of innocenco. I was arraigned for exami­ nation before a Justice of the Peace. I had 'Squire Duval and the man with whom I boarded, introduced as wit­ nesses. Ilie 'Squire's testimony amounted to no'hing. but the testi­ mony of my landlord made my blood run cold. "Mr. Buck went to bed at the usual hour," said he, "but about midnight he got up and went out When he came back, which he did after some time, I heard him washing his hands, and at moriHng when I went to the wash shelf on the porch I saw blood stains in the bottom of the bowl." The truth is, unable to sleep I had gotten up. I went out, lighted my pipe, and walked around, smoking. As I was returning to the house, I came in contact with the ead of a rail which projee'ed over the fence, forcing a few drops of blood from my nose. When I made the statement, the peo pie looked suspiciously at me. Mj lawyer made an able speech, dwelling on the fact that 1 Ivad nothing against him; and although 1 had known him to be something of a materialist, yet sup­ ported the 'Squire's opinion insomuch that as the old man had unquestionably written the note, he might have cut off his own head. The magistrate decided that the evi­ dence waa sufficiently strong to justify my detention, and, as the case was not bailable, I was taken to jail. I had great hope* that the grand jtiry would fail to return an indictment, but I was disappointed. When it became known that the charge ngainst me was sus­ tained by the gentlemen in secret ses­ sion, a mob assembled and it was with great difficulty that' the sheriff could keep me from the clutches of the yell­ ing avengers. One morning, just b.-fore the meeting of the court before which 1 was to be tried, the sheriff entered the jail and said: "Mr. Buck, you are free. Bead this letter. It was wr.tten by a crazy man, well known in this community, and waa addressed to tho circuit judge." The surprise was so gladdening--the thought of regaining my liberty and unco more taking my place among re­ spected men, filled me with such a de­ sire to tlirow up my hat that it was with difficulty that 1 could repress my ex­ ultation long enough to read the letter. The document which effected my lib­ eration ran as follows: "Judge, while no one is bothering me, and while I sit alone *in my room, number 102 left wing, I will drop you a few lines. We used to go to school to­ gether didn't we, judge? Well, some time ago--I don't know how long for sometimes it seems ten years and then ; ten minutes-- I slipped away from tlie asylum. They had given me the priv­ ilege of walking otit I got on a train ami went up to your town. It was night and nobody saw me. After J had walked around awhile, I got down ou my knees and lapped wa*er out of a puddle. Ye\ I did. I saw a light in a house and 1 went in. An old man with white hair was in the house. It tickled me to look at him. While we were talking, a funny idea occnir^d tome: 'Supposa the people were to come here in the morning and find that old man's head on the rock table, what would they say? It would puzzle 'em if ho was to leave a note saying that he had cut oft' his head and put it there. I could put his head there and wri.e the note, but the people might know his handwriting and detect the forgery. I won't commit forgery. It is w rong. They send the folks to the penitentiary for forgery. I'll get him to wr»te the note' That is the way the funny idea ran through my head. I be­ gan to talk plessant y to him, was | told him that I owned a farm a short distance from town. Well, I do, judge. I won't tell a lie unless it is to heip along a great cause. 'Will you do mo a groat favor?'I asked. He said that lie would. 'I want to play a joke on my little girl,' said L 'She can read and write, but I can't. The other day she whipped her doll. 1 told her that she ought not to be so cruel, that if she didxi't mind the doll would commit sui­ cide. Now, I tell you what I nm going to da I am going to cut off the doll's head and put it ou a stool and leave a note, explaining the funny situation. While she is weeping over tho death of her doll I will take out a nicer one which I shall have liaudv, and make her glad. Won't you please write dow n the words I dictate?' He laughed at the idea, said it was the first tini9 lie had laughed for years. I told him that I was glad to afford him any amuse­ ment, and that I would bj grateful if he would write the words for me. He did so and I went out. I slipped into a store, through a window end pot a new butcher knife. Then I went back and found the old man reading. WTe talked a while and then, when he wasn't noticing me, I grabbed him by the throat and forced him to the floor. He wan too weak to struggle much and 1 had very little trouble in cutting his throat, but cutting off his head was not such an easy job. 1 got it off after a while, and had to laugh when 1 put it on the rock table, and when I put the note beside it. It tickled me so mudi that I had to blow out the light. I shut the door carefully and went away. I jumped on a freight tr.iin and rodto where nobody could see me. When I got off, I threw nearly all of my clothes in the river. By morning I was at the asylum. They had been looking for me. Since then they won't let me go out. I showed this letter to the super­ intendent and expected him to laugh, but he did't. He can't see a joke. 1 asked him to hand it back, that I wanted to write a few more lines. He did so. If you see the old man's head, it will tickle you." A HttFLESS MAN HELPEft ' The people * ho would have been willing to hang me, offered to gener­ ously support my paper if I would re­ main, but the town was distasteful to me. I am now engaged in farming, and am reasonably contented, but I shudder every time I see an old man with white hair.--Arkausaw Traveler. Mck- Wines. The paternal tenderness with which wine is regarded, bo;h by its producers and consumers, is amusing. They speak of it a« being "sick"," describe its "disoases" and their remedies a* though it were a sentiment being; and its diseases, like our own, are now at­ tributed to baccilli, bacteria, cr other microbia. Pasteur, who has worked out this question of the origin of disease in wine, as he is so well known to have done in animals, recommends (in papers read before the French academy in J\Iay and August. 18G5,) that these microbja be "killed" by filling the bottles clone up to the cork, which is thrust in just with sufficient firmness to allotf the wine, on expanding, to force it out a little, but not entirely, thus preventing any air from entering tho bottle. fJ ho bottles are then heated to temperatures rang­ ing from 45 degrees to J00 decrees (J. (113 to 212 degrees Fahrenheit,) where they remain for an hour or two. They are then set aside^ allowed to cool, and the cork driven in. It is said that this treatment kills the microbia, gives to the wine an increased Jbouquet and im- prpved color--in fact, ages it consider ably. Both old and new wines may be thus treated. I simply state this on the authority of Pasteur, having made no direct ex­ periments or observations on the dis­ eases, which he describes as resulting in acetification, ropiness. bitterness, and decay or decomposition. There is, however, another kind of sickness which 1 have studied, both ex­ perimentally and theoretically. I reier to the temporary sickness which some­ times occurs to rich wines when they are moved from one cellar to another, and to wines when newly exported from their native climate to our own. The wines that are the most subject to such sickness are those that are the most genuine--the natural, unsophisti­ cated wines, those that have not been subjecled to "fortification," to "vinage," to "plastering," "sulphuring," etc. The sickness shows itself by the wine becoming turbid, or opalescent, then throwing down either a crust or a loo?e, troublesome sediment.-- IV. Mat- tieu Williams, in Popular Science Monthly. The Creole's Ceel Skin. There is a curious statement of div­ ers writers to the effect that the skin of the West Indian Creole feels cooler than that of a European or American from the Northern States. The same is true of the Louisiana Creole; the vigorous European or Northener who touches a Creole hand during the burn­ ing hours of a July or August day has reason to be surprised at its coolness-- such* a coolness as tropical fruits retain even under the perpend cular fire of an equatorial SUP.--Harper's ff ttcklj. Hasty Speech. It ia a common fault to talk without reflection. Slang has its phrase of scorn for this habit, where it speaks of a person as "firing off his mouth." This habit grows by use, and ends wi^i making everybody uncomfortable. Young people might do well to learn that "an ounce of keep-your-wouth- shut is better than a pound of explana­ tions afterwards." THE Chicago Herald inquires: "Is the moon ihhabited ?" The moon, be­ ing made of green cheese, is, of course, inhabited.--Chicago Telegram, THE plant of happinesa cannot thrive with the air of cheerfulness. At Greencastle, Ind., on hour's rMe from Indianapolis, lives Mr. D. L. Southard, a gentleman well known throughout Indiana. Among other honorable positions which be holds Is that of Trustee of the De Pauw Uni­ versity. Mr. Southard is a brother-in-law of Biahop Bowman, ot the Methodist Episcopal Church. For manjr years Mr. Southard was a mar­ tyr to rheumatism In its mo<t afflictive form. lip to Jul>*, 1S88. ho was nearly helples*. and could move only with great pain. At that time Bishop Bowman, having seen how greatly the Kev. Mr. Keely, of Indianapolis, had been relieved by the new remedy, Ath- lophcros, brought Mr. Southard a lottlo of that medicine, and advised him to try it. Mr. Southard's experience, resulting from his trial of Athlophoros, was thus stated at a recent Interv iew. Bishop Bowman happened to le vMtin* Mr. Southard at the lime. anJ the cxchungo of Ideas and opinions as to rheumatism and the radiial remedy for It, was free and pleasant. ^ald Mr. Southard: "1 had for years been fu ierinjr with rheumatic pains. My arms and lcjrs were swollen, end tho pain was ' 6harr> and constant. I wsw unable todiess ! myself, or even to put on my stockings. Mv i wile liad to lift me and turn me In bed. llishc.p bowman brought me a bottle ot Ath- | lophoi oH. I hardly dared to hope for any | benefit from it, for 1 bad taken so many medicines. > | "I be^an to take the Athlophoros first as j directed. At that tiine I was suffering: ] lritfhuul pain, in a few hours there was a I remarkable change. I broke out into a pro- j trse per.-piration, and had a strange feelinjr j •of reiier. In a few hours more all my pain | was gone. I could stretch my legs and move J my joints as I had no; been able to do tor a lonj? time. It seemed wonderful, after all my experience, that any ir.ed cine could have such effects. I feared that this was of such power that it wou d go to my vital parts and end my life. Knowing not what might be the result. I quietly prepared myself tor tho final change and calmly awaited it. But, in­ stead of putting an end to me the Ath- lophoros only put an end to tho pain. What n new nnd delightful experience it was o bo without pain! "I gave a letter to ihe Athlophoros con­ cern. which was published. It brought me a great many inquiries by mail from various ports of the country. I wish I could show you some of those letter#, but I was clearing out my desk the other day, and I de­ stroyed the whole pWe of them. One was lrom a man in Winchester, Ind., whose wife was suffering ajrony. I directed hitn wh?re to «et tho medicine and it foon made her well. The wife of Prof. Goblin, of tho Uni­ versity, was suaerln* with rheumatism, and Athlopboro-4 cured l;er, as weli as a good many others. "At times I would l.ave return of my rheu­ matism, bnt nothing like that 1 formerly had. Each attack was lighter. Each time I fought it with Ath'opboros, and got the better of it. Now 1 have ior n year enjoyed good health and freedom from piing. I took in all ten or twelve bottles of the medicine, and if I were a sain to be attacked by rheumatism would take more." U shop Bowman, on being asked "was the relief which Mr. Southard experienced more than jou had expectod.'" replied: "Certainly it was, for I had not expected anything. I brought him tho Athlophoros because I had teen that it ha I done so much good to Mr. Kielyand oib?is in li diauapolis. It seemed a last resort, lor Mr. t-'outimrd's case was such u severe one that 1 had little or no hope of even giving him relief. But seeing tho completeness of his cure 1 have recommend­ ed the medicirc to others. I have had no oc­ casion to use it my.-elf, for I have not hail rheumatism and am in excellent health. Of ell those to whom I have recommended it I have heard of oniy one instance in which de­ cided benefit was not euiiiel. I consider , Athlophoros a wonderful medicine." It you cannot get ATHi.cr noKOs of your drug- gist.'we will send it express j aid on receipt d| regular price--one dollar per bottle We pre er that yon buy it from your druggist, bnt if he tmsn't it, do not- be persuaded to try something else, but order at once from us as. directed. ATHLOPHOEOS CO.. 112 Wall Htreet, New York. The Old Boys. I often » onder if the young men of this day enjoy themselves as much as we old folks rsed to when we were their age. I sometimes think they do not, because they pay more attention to their dress than Uteir pleasures, and they seem to take their vices in coarser draughts than their predecessors in the flowery paths of youth and riot. But this .may be only the bilious view of a disgruntled philosopher who regrets that the wine has lost the sparkle of twenty years ago, though the brand may not have changed, and one night's indulgence in the delights of tho table is followed by a week's active palpita­ tion of the liver. Positively one every-day young man is a repetition of tho other. They are as much alike as ChiiJanien. It is diffi­ cult to tell them apart unless one fel­ low has a cast in his eye, a limp, or has a broken nose. To me they look as if the same tailor made their clothes, the same bootmaker their boots, and their hair ayd mustaches were trimmed by the same barber. Their mannerisms have been acquired in the same school, and their slang studied from the same book. They tire me because I am old, and I detest a young fellow who cannot be original in something--his vices, even, if nothing else be left him. The old crowd, the crop of gay boys that flourished twenty years ago, were more independent, if one fellow ap­ peared with long hair, his friend would have his own cut short. If one invent­ ed and acquired an odd expression, oath, or otherwise, his right to it was respected. Nobody trespassed upon his preserves, nobody borrowed his property. His method of lighting a cigar, or lifting his hat, or wearing his necktie was never copied by a friend. Indeed, the man who could not cut his own swathe, who liad not brains enough to devise a peculiarity, was barred from our circle.--The Ingleside. Alton Shaken an 1 Seorch«d Br tto paranmaa of chills and fcv«r, tto wretched •offerer for whom quinine haa been prescribed, essavB In vain to exterminate the dreadful disease with that hurtful palliative, which at beat only mitigates the violence of the fits, and eventually proves highly injurious to the system. In order to effect a thorough cure ot malarial fever, whether intermittent or re­ mittent, or to tender the system impregnable to its attacks, Hostet er's Stomach Bitters For Cfeadi , Mrs. A.| M. Dauphin, Av*« Philadelphia, ia well known to tM ladies of that city from the great gcod she haa done by means of Lydia E. Finkham's Vegetable Compound, ehe writes .Mrs. Pinkham of a recent interesting case: "A young married lady came to me suffering with a severe case of Prolapsus and Ulceration. She com­ menced taking the Compound, and in - two months was fuUti rettored. In proof of this sho soon found herself in an interesting --"An Tnrml should be used daily. That this medicine is a i Bearehinf! eradiennt ot disease* generated by miasm*, and a relisblo safesnard against them, is a fact so widely r eopnlred in this nnd other , T__ _ . covin(tii's that to adduce evidence in support of conu.t on. influenced by foolish friends, ehe it is luniece^wy; i»ut w^re U either csAciitki > attempted to evido the responsibilities of or deniable to do so, it may well be supposed I . that from the testimony corroborative of it* mater,lUjr- Alter ten or twelve days she cl. lms, which has been accumulating during the last twenty-tive years and over, Mifticlent proofs mislit be tatherci to convince the most invet- erate skeptic. • Rest for tirowing Children. It is often found in growing children that the appetite fails, the tongue and breath become foul, extreme languor and lassitude of limb, headache with caprice of mind supervene, when no improper diet or damp or bad air can be accused of producing the symptonp. The real cause will be found in the fact of growth. The efforts of the nerves, both animal and organic, to carry on this process, not of maintenance only, but of addition to the body, and es­ pecially the efforts of the digestive nerves to supply the necessary material for growth, prove every now and then to be more than they can make without falling into a state of irritation; and such irritation is exhibited in the two nervous centers, the brain and stomach. That this is the explanation of such at­ tacks I have proved a hundred times.-*- Dr. UuJlij, in H<raid of Health. " Fools Rush In, Where Angels Fear to Tread." . memory is impaired, self-confidence is lacking; at night bad dreams occur, premature old age seems setting in, ruin is in tho track. I11 con­ fidence, you can, and should write to Dr. R. V. Pierce, of Hutra'.o, N. Y., the author of a treatise for the benefit of that class of pa­ tients, and describe your symptoms and sufferings. He can cure you at your home, and will t-end you full particulars by mail. "\OXK but the brave deserve the fare," re­ marked tho conductor, boldly pocketing the unregistered nickels.--tsfe. BEST French Brandy, Smart-Weed, Jamaica Ginge ', and Camphor Water, as combined in Dr. Pierce's Extract of Smart-Wee.i, is the best remedy for colic, diarrnuca. cholera morbus, dysentery or bloodv-tlux; also, to break up colds, fevers, and iatiammatory attacks, if usoil early. A TEXAS et or--giving a nan twenty-four hours to leave town. came to me (gain, and she was indeed in a most alarming state and suffered terribly. I ®ave her a tablespoonful of tho compound •every hour for eight hours until she fell laslecp; she awoke much relieved and i vi- tiently better. She continued tt.king tho Com­ pound, and in due season she became the mother of a fine healt'.iy boy. But for the timely usa of the medicine she believes her life would have been lost." A PLEASANT LETTER. It Rings of a Grateful Heart and • gives Honor Where Honor is JDue. Mr. William W. Chadwick, of Hatchville, Couu.. writes uuder date of June 14, 1880,, to Dr. Keunedy to say that the use of "Ken­ nedy's Favorite Remedy" has cured him of Gall Stone, from which he had experienced everything but comfort for a long time. Mr. Chadwick fe'.t wholly cured when he wrote, and pays: "I have had 110 pain for six months and have also regained my flesh and can stand a fair day's work. I recommend 'Ken­ nedy's Favorite Remedy' to any one suffer­ ing from a Deranged Liver." Grateful pa­ tient-s are common. Dr. Kennedy is daily in receipt of letters from them, expressing similar sentiments. These letters are spon- e_i_ * C "t, „ . taueous and put in all varieties of phmsc- .nteSn 0! g VZn 10 ^ * Sblogv, but invariably settin- forth one thing ana Inniscrotions; and. as a result, nervous. i * • v? -A i> * » mental, and organic debility follow, memory Tth" valu^ of 8 tuv,orlte l-e^y for many forms of disease. It may be just the thing you have been looking for. Is your Liver disordered? Have you l),?nmgein nt of the Kidneys or Bladder associated with Constipation of the Bowels? If so. you want "Kennedy's Favorite Remedy." Dr. Kenne- dv practices Medicine and Surgery in all their branches. Write and state your case frankly. Letters promptly answered. Ad­ dress l)r. David Kennedy, Rondont, N. Y. "Dr. Kennedy's Favorite Remedy" for sale by all druggists. Important. When yon visit or leave New Tork City, save K&girage Expressieo and Carriage Hire, and atop at the Grand Union Hotel, opposite Grand Central Depot: fun) elegant rooms fitted up at a cost of one million dolluis, 1 educed to $1 and npwards per day. European plan. Elevator, Restaurant supplied with the bos!. Horse cabs stage, and elevated rsilroid to all depots. Fami­ lies can live better for less money nt the Grand I'ntim than at any tlrst-e'nss hotel in the citv. Worse tlinm Firearm*. The editor of an Omaha paper, in com­ menting on several cases in that city where children died from the effects of taking cough syrup containing morphia, remarks that opiates, poisons, and narcotics are more dangerous than firearms. Mothers should note this, and, furthermore, that different Boards of Health, after making careful analyses, have certified that the only purely vegetable preparation of this kind, and one that is in every way harmless, prompt, and effective, is tied Star Cough Cui-e. Mayor Latrobe, of Baltimore, and the Commissioner of Health have publicly indorsed this valuable discovery. Happy Married Folks. I Married people would be happier if they tried to be as agreeable as in courtship days; if each would try and be a real support and comfort to the other; if household expenses were always proportioned to receipts; if each remembered the other was practically a human being, not an angel; if women were as kind to their husbands as they are to their lovers; if men were as thoughtful for their wives as they were for them when sweethearts; if both parties remembered that they were married for worse as well as for better; if there were fewer silk and velvet street ccstumes and more plain, tidy honse dresses and street ones, too, for that matter; if there were fewer "please, darlings," in public and more common manners in private; if wives and husbands would take their pleasure as they go along, and not degenerate into mere toiling machines. "Is THERE no balm in Gilead? Ia there no physician there?" Thanks to Dr. Pierca, there is a balm in hit ••Golden Medical Discovery"--a "balm for every wound" to health, from colds, coughs, consumption, bronchitis, and all chronic, blood, lung, and liver affeotions. Of druggists. WHEN a tailor goes to law It is generally not so much to gain a mitt aa to get the coat of on*. A KIIIKM> thinks that the winds mu?t be ejrrcat mathematicians because they sitth for­ ever.--Uushtn Trai e. r/pf. Hortiford'M Aeiil Phosphate, , ABVANTAGES IX DYSPEPSIA. C. V. Dorse;,\ I'i ;ua, Ohio, savs: "I have used it ir. dyspepsia with very marked, benefit. If there is dclteiency of acid in the stomach, nothing u'lords more relief, while the action on the ncrvoas system is decidedly LencOtial," IF a fellow really wants a niche in the Temp e ot Fame he has sot to come up to the scratch. _ Confhft, Colds, Croup* Conromp* tlon, and Remedy. Of all the multitude of fearful ills that prey upon and destroy the human race, consumption stands out with distinctive prominence as the most alarming. A cold at first, then a neglected cough leads to tho development of this scourge of mankind. One remedy that has survived tho test of trial is Allen's Lung Balsam, compounded from the purest ingredients and free from all combinations of opium. For coughs, colds, croup, bronchitis, and all other af­ fections of tho throat and lungs it stands unrivaled.' It approaches so nearly a spe­ cific that,with the common sense directions around each bottle strictly complied with, ninety-five per cent, of consumptive cases are permanently cured by this invaluable remedy. The safety of every family would be consulted by keeping a bottle of Allen's Lung Balsam in the house and have it ready for use when coughs, colds, and croup make their unwelcome intrusion. Marvelous Kestomtions. The cures which* are being made by Drs. Starkcy & Palen, 1109 Cilrard street, Philadel­ phia, in Consumption, Catarrh, Neuralgia, Drotiehitls, Rheumatism, and all chronic dis­ eases, by Compound Oxygen, are indeed marvelous. If you are a sullerer from any di.-case tfhich your physician has failed to cure, write for information about this Treat­ ment. A Congh, Cold, or Sore Throat should not be neglected. Bnowij^s BROJC- CHIAI, TROCHES are a simple refhedy, and give prompt relief. 25 cts. a box. MENSMAN'R PEPTONIZED BEKF TOXIC, tho only preparation of liecf containing its en­ tire nutritious properties. It contams blood- making, force generating, and life-sustaining properties; invaluable for indigestion, dys­ pepsia, nervous prostration, and all forms of general debility: also, in all enfeebled condi­ tions, whether the result of exhaustion; nerv­ ous prostration, over-work, or acute disease, particularly if resulting from pulmonury complaint*. Caswell, Hazard & Co., proprie­ tors, New York. Sold by druggists. A Hundred Ycur* might he spent in search of a remedy for Catarrh, Cold in the Head and Hay Fever, without finding the equal of Ely's Cream llalm. It is applied with the finger. Being pleasant and cafe, it supercedes the use of all liquids and snuffs. Its etlect is maxicHl. It relieves at once and cures many cases which baffle physicians. Price TO ceute at druggist;. ttO cents by mail. Ely Uros., Owego, N. Y. An Kx<iui«lte Skin Beantifier and Toilet Requisite is "Becson's Aromatic Alum Sulphur Koap." Its exclusive u-e will soften and beautify Complexion, prevent, heal and cure Skin Dis­ eases; excellent for Children and Babies: 26c, of Druirglsts, or by mail of Win. Dreydoppel, Philadelphia, Pa: CATARRHAL HEADACHE. 1 think Ely's Cream Balm is the best remedy for catarrh I ever saw. I never took anything that relieved me so quickly, and I have not felt eo we:I for a long time. I used to be troubled with severe headaches two or three times a week, but since using the Balm have only had one, and that v as very light compared with former ones.--J. A. Alcorn, Apent I'. P. K. R. Co.. Eaton, Colo. „ _ ur IN. Rheumatism, ̂ Neuralgia, Sciatica, Lumbago, Backache, H«adach«, Toothache, •ore Thrrat,Rwrlllnn,Rprmla>.BruliM, Barns, IcaMi, mil Blip*, A*D ALL OTHEK BODILY PAIM AH" ACItm M i l ; D r a i t U t i u K l I W r O u u i M l h t Direction* ia It unima. THE CRAWLER A. VMELEK CC. FFMIM 10 A. VOOHXa *00.) aiaft^ SuapltBook. Premium iaswrriM Urt mat CAIIIIS free. V. 0. <5aHD 00, OMMubrook* Ooaa He Who Becomes a Treasurer of Money for Another Is Respon­ sible for a Safe Return. much more responsible is he who hat fa rnsTgfe the health and life of a human being. We have considered w ell the responsibility, and in preparinv our ALL-EN'S LUNG BAL­ SA which for twenty-five years has been fa­ vorably known as one of the best anil purest remedies for all Throat and Lung Diseases, we are particular to use not i.inc but the best ingre­ dients. NO OPIUM in any lorm enters lis com­ position. It is to your interest to stand by the old and tried remedy, ALl.KN'H LUNG BAL­ SAM, and see that a bottle is always kept en lisnd for immediate use. IlEAD T1IK FOLLOW- 1MiNEW EVIDENCE: Armsos, Pa., Anril T. 188J, 1 took .1 violent eold and it settled <>n my hinzs.ao mu' li so that ut times 1 »pit blood. ALLEN S IXNCi BALSAM was iwommoiulod to me a good remedy. 1 took it. and am now round and well. Yours renpecttully, A.J. HILEMAN. ADDISON, Pa.. April, 188S. A. J.COLBOM. Esq.,Editor of the Srai'rsrt llmiUl, writes-. I can recommend ALLEN'S LIJNO BALSAM as Iteing the beat remedy for Colda and C'ouRhs I ever ueed. ASTOHIA. Ills.. April 6,1883. OpntlemonI can rhc rfnlly «ay your AIXEN*8 H'N<1 BALSAM. which 1 have K<>1 1 for the past fifteen yearn, sells than any couEh remedy, and fcives Keneral satixfaction. 'Tie fmiueutly recommended by the medical l>roli'8aion hero. Yours truly. 11. C. MOONEX, Driipgiat. LA FAYETTE, 11. I„ Oct. 12,1881. GentlemenAllow me to say that after using three bottles of ALLEN*8 LUNG BALSAM for a bad attack of Bronchitis, I am entirely cured. 1 send this vol­ untarily, that those afflicted may be benefited. Yours respectfully, Bt'IUULL H. DAVIS. --The weakest woman, and sickest invalid safety and great good. --Old men tottering arotmd from! matism, kidney trouble or any will be made almost new by i ~ «"My wife and dai^hterliiNil healthy by the use of hop leeommenil fheui to u\y pcoplo.- dist Clergyman. Ask any {rood doctor if hop Bittrrs arc not the best family medicfw On earth Ml Malarial fever. Ague and Biliousness will leave every neighborhood as soon as hop bitters arrive. "My mother drove the paralysis -and neuralgia all oat of her system with hop bitters."--Ed. Omrego Svn. - ^ *» Keep the kidneys healthy with hop bitters nnd yon need not fear sickncas." - Ice water is rendered hamHas and ' more refreshing and reviving with hop bit- - ters in each draught. --The vipor of yonth for th« aged and in- Arm in hop bitters!!! i --"At the change of life nothing equals 1 •{ Hop Bitters to allay all troubles inddsHt >• I Thereto." „ , J --"The best periodical for ladies to take h monthly, and from which they will receive the greatest benefit is hop bitters." --Mothers with sickly, fretful, anrsing children, will cure the children and benefit j themselves by tiking hop bitters daily. --Thousands die annually from some fWm ^ of kidney disease that might have been prs- vented by a timely use of hop bitters. --Indigestion, weak stomach, irregnhui- ; ties of the bowels, cannot exist whoa hop ; bitters are used. A timely * * • use of hop "M Bitters will keep a whole family y • In robust health a year at a little cost? : --To produce real genuine *le«p «n* child-like repos« all night, take * htaa hop bitters on retiring. JSTNone gennine without a bunch of fNca Hops on the white label. Shun all the i iln. |IUM «tutf with "Hop" or "Hops" in their nana. J. N. HARRIS & GO.(IMeJ) Props. CINCINNATI, OHIO. FOR SALE by all MEDICINE DEALERS. There is no lnflrmtty so oppressive and bur­ densome to the human mind as that tired feel­ ing' of which so many complain on tho ap­ proach of serious disorders. The depression and despondency of spirit attendinfrthisstate are immeasurable. Thutconstant drain that is taking from your system all its former elasticity, driving tho bloom from your cheeks; that continued strain upon your vital forces, rendering you irritable and fretful. DON'T F;)H(iET, ail of those ailments can b# easily removed and permanently curod, by the use of HOPS % MALT BITTERS Recommended by physiolans, ministers and nurses. I prescribe •lopM and MALT Bit­ ters regularly In mv practice.--ROBERT TURNER, M. D., Flat llock, Mich. If you cannot get Hops andKIALT Hi Iters of your druggist we will send it, expt'oss paid, on recclpi of regular price. $1 per bottle. We prefer that you buy it from your druggist; but'if he has not got it, do not be persuaded to try something else, but order at once from us as directed, Do not get Hops and MAI/ft' Hitters con­ founded with other inferior preparations of similar name. Take nothing but lions nnd 3IAI/1" Hitter*. HOPS & MALT BITTERS CO., Detroit. Mich. GOU)EK HEAL BITTEKS. Dyspepsia is the prevail, ing malady of civilized life. A weak, dyspeptic stoiuaeh acts very slowly or not at all on many kind™ of food, Koses are eitru-ated, acids are formed and ).fH-oine a source of pain and disease, until discharged. To he dys­ peptic ia to lie miserable, hopeless, depreased. eon- fused in HHIKI, forgetful, ir­ resolute, drowsy, weak, lan­ guid, and u.aeless. It de­ stroys the Teeth, Complex­ ion,Strength,Peace of Mind, wid Bodily ease. It pro­ duces Headache, Pain in Shoulder*. Tight­ ness of t'liest. Dizziness, Sour Kruetatioun ot Stom­ ach, Bad'Tante in Month, .BilioiiH Attackx, Palpitation of Heart, Inflammation of I.uTiL-K. Pain in the region of the Kidneys, and a hundred (First yimuer MI ME UIUUU UUU ICSTVIN WI UCM»U< In thepe complaints it has no equal. We warrant acure. OOLDEX SKAL BITTERS CO.. Holland City, Mieh. Sold by all druggixts. Take ho others. If your drug­ gist does not keen it, we will send one bottle and pre­ pay express for $1, or six bottles for |5. TELEGRAPHY I vAucvriNi; Tauifht and Situations Furnished. CiECtiuiwniM. : BKOH., Janesvllle, Wis. P A T E N T S ! .J. F. BEALE, Attorney, 637 F Street «T. W., Washington, 1). C. 14 years' experiences L&DY AGEMTS permanent employment and good salary " "tana Suspender Co., Cincinnati, O. MenThink' they know all about Mustang Lin­ iment. Few do. Not to know is ' '$!&-•" r' ' ' - f X $ t A PHYSICIAN'S ADVICE. If you are suffering from general de­ bility, nervous prostration, sinktBC spells, etc , superinduced by impure blood, weak kidneys and liver, etc., do not resort to alcoholic compounds. Bar use remedies that cause too great activity of the parts affected. It is far more wise to use a mild alterative like Dr. Q(ty« sott's Yellow Dock and Itm* parilla. This remedy containsaothlag injurious to the moot delicate constipa­ tion, and its use gradually builds np and strengthens, while diuretic and cathartic compounds tear down, wear ont and de­ stroy. Dr. Gut/soft's Yellotti Dock and Sari- aparilla restores impaired or lost organ­ ic functions to their normal (onditfoa,' and it Invariably gives satisfaction to all who use it. Do not forget that any druggtst Kill procure the remedy for you, especially when they find you will not be perscaded to try some other preparation on which they make more money. You will find its effect most wonderful. Y«.ur old energy will return, your natural force come baci, and yon will feel altogether a new person, full of health, strength and vigor. Former invalids epcak highly of the preparation, and all acknowledge it a perfect health restorer, especially in diseases of a debilitating nature havlnc a tendency to poison and thin the bloods thereby weakening the urinary and di­ gestive organs, and exhausting the brata and nervous system. M9*Wora out and enfeebled OM*v stitutions, suffering from dyspep«A^ impure blocd, weak kidneys, nerv­ ousness, etc., can be cared by using this remedy. Take no other. OUR BUBAL I0IB8. 4 UNPARALLELED'OFFER! S2.00 HOR ONLY 0O C&NT8. TN' OUDF.R TO INCREASE OUR CIRCCLATHH* to 50,000 at once, we make this great offer, itohn- son'x Poultry Book for Pleasure and Proflt,priM Kendall's Book, Horses and his diseases,price ! 11,1)0 worth of choice Garden Seeds, including packages of the best varieties, and Oar Rtuaiiloi one year for 50c. We desire to have our paper raartS the homes of all interested farmers and make this*' Inducement fit! our coming volume. Address, OUR RURAL HOMES, > SturgLs, Mich. tHERONS VICTORIOUS IX 1KB Lt©iste of Breed* i ONLY TWICE Have the i.rmt Herds of HieKival Breed*eft: Draft HOIMK met in competition: / First, at CHICAGO IN ~ .eolUftla--«C 91(000 FRIES, offered, which waaafe' mliably wea to Heat, agaia at tkk WOKUTS fill at; TKm-w Ortoaaa, 1884"8, f where four of the Bent Herds in tawloa Ot Ike tflBU- ent breeds were entered for the j ' $500 BWEEPSTAJESS HOT IB2SB. I and again IT W. Dunham'* ••kU*i .Ua< «f Pti ai. CKM were vietarlMM. Here, alao, Hr. Deaaam wea* awarded tne Ftrat Prise !• Krrrj Stain-- CaaSWJ tered for. aa follow*: For Stallions.fyeare«M«M over--29 entries--BHIIlalt, flrwt; Stallions 3 jaaie MS -•23 cntriea, OaaMeat, firsts StaiUoaa S entries, Ceaar, first. Alto, first for btfluCldtBtoullflBa. M. W. DUNHAM, WAVNE, M PM£ CO.. Il l WW, -j now has the following Pedigreed •toek ma •aa4s 1 ISO Imparted Breed Mares, 1' 280 Imported! OtaHleaa. Old enaagh Bw «er*i<*. alfo. 1OO Colta, two years old and yoaagsr. r 14fl Page Catalog"? s<*nt fr«e. It la itlwtratedwMhf* Six Pictures of Prize Horses drawn from life ta Kunhear, the mo-t famous of all animal paintsra. BUGGIES? - iHlt i: OPIUM |ANTED§g%<3%* work at their own hemes. Ml to L eaeily made. Wort ««nt by mail. S#< intc. We have good demand ior oarsN.-- mrntoh tteadr employmeat. AiMiiaa ' a atamp CaowaMra. Co- aH Vi»«8t,Cle1t.< R. U. AWARE THAT LoHllard'i Qbug Pt« Nm-rr Climlaaa. and that Latlllard* tne best ana chsapeat, qnallty rwiHhhsu FRAZER AXLE GREASE. Best lathe War|d. Gattfea aeaataa. mir£*d nfur*!. tSoilH^U^mSU ibmipotmnit BARER. AW*IER«I«TIV4 F. O. ML D3k T. •. ftLOCUM. Ul r*arl St., K«vM. C. N. IT. WHEN WRITING TO ADTORTISKRS* pt«*a«e say you MLW (lie ftUvertiaemcat In thin paper* Avails any a Lady v is beautiful, all but her skin; and nobody has ever told her how easy it is to put beauty on the skin. Beauty on the Bain. •' '/'j ' - : i' ; • --* • ^ m h,m ; - V : »** - t <v »ar T. . \ .. ..." « . H. S »VijMfc , V" .FM ~ J ' 4i j / V •••" •• ••V-V"C