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: ?|V ,-4,:'^ " * '^L «••*• ' ••.••iv-^r-.H- ' •'• &g • '.-"r'.v . .-• .-. •> t . p . . ^ ; > ; v , V."*' !f-^.""; ' v.'\v- am V • ' ' ^ t r j r • - • • • ; * ' • : - ' • • I 'M <i Pledged but to Truth, to Liberty apl Law; No Favors Win us and no Pear Shall Awe." VOL, 12. BUSINESS CARDS. i h Piaunw Krm WBDITBSDAT BT •J. VAN 8LYKT3> . i»t»ITOS ASfD PaOPBISTOi. Office in Bishop's Block, *--OFTOMTB PBSRT ft OWEK'S TERMS or SUBSCRIPTION/ ftae Tear (In mtum) ..41 IINot Paid within Three Months--*. .. iOO SuMorlption* received tor (three or Mx Month* in the same proportion. Bates oi Advertising. We announce liberal rated for advertising a the PLinrbiiLM, and endeavor to cute them *o plainly that thev will be readily an- teratoid. They are as follows: M. F. ELLSWORTH, ATTORNEY at Law, and Solicitor in Oh an eery, Nanda, III. ASA W. SMITH, TTOBNKY AT YAW and Solicitor! in II Chancery.--Wood B toe k, IlL 1 Inch one year t Inches one year 8 Inches one year - * Ooimnn one year Gelamn one year. Column one year I T . IN :. . . MM • • • • • • • . • . u r n . " •. • - MM MOO . . . . . 1 M 0 0 One inch means the meaitirement of one aeh down the column, single column width. Yearly advertisers, at the above rates, have ttee privilege of changing as often as they Shoose, without extra charge. Regular advertisers (meaning those having Standing cards) will be entitled to insertion •f local notices at the rate of 5 cents per line ' each week. All others will be charged 10 eents per line the fi'at week, and Bcents per Uae for each subsequent week. Transient advertisements will be charged it the rate of 10 oents pe line, (nonpareil type, same as this is set in) the first issue, and • eents per line for subsequent issues. This, an Inch advertisement will cost $1.00 for one week, 11.50 for two weeks, 92.00 for three IK£iks> and so on. 5 he PtAiNDKAUHt will be liberal In giving ed toriftl notices, but, as a business rule, It will require a suitable fee from everybody peeking the use of its columns for pecuniary gain. BUSINESS CARDS. | B. T. BROWN, M. D. fcv/ ^HrslOIAW AND SURGEON. O«0S at I Residence, McHenry, 111. O. H. FEGERS, M, D- PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON, McHenry, Ills. Offlce at Residence. ^ O. J. HOWARD, M. D. PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON, McHenry, III. Offlce one door West of Fltsslmmons A Evanson's store, up Stairs. BARBIAN BROS. CIGAR Manufacturers, McHenry, III. Or­ders solicited. Shop, la Old McHenry, in Keiter Block, third door west of Riverside Bouse. Livery Stable. E. WIUHTMAH, Proprieior. rimi s i class rigs, with or without dftt4M furnished at reasonable rates. Teaming of ill kinds done on short notice. 10-7-tf Mds an MIH, M fhos* who writ* to SUBMBS Co.,Portland, Maine,will receive (tree, fall information about work which UMycando, and live at home,that will pay th*m from $5 to $25 per day. Some have vv MhM OT.r $60 la A day. Either sex, yonnp or old. Capita! " Ml required. Too ara ttarted free. ThoM who ttart at ooe* -- s>*ol*t*ly wwrfmi little fortune. Alltaaaw. 0- G. ANDREWS ROBT SCHIESSLE Having purchased the old stand 1 % of Joseph W iedemann, NEAR THE DEPOT, McHENBY, ILLINOIS, Keeps open for the accommodation (of the labile a Flrst-OlMS Saloon and Restaurant, Where he will all times keep th#»st • brands of Wtoes, Liquors and Cigars to be found in tne market. I' • Also Agent For v :':<|TRANZ FALK'i . IILfADKII LAGER BIER. Beer in Large or Small Kegs or Bottles el- Ways on band, cheaper than any other, quali­ ty considered. - Orders by mail promptly attended to. GOOD STABLING FOR HOR3B& WCall ami see us. <')• Robert Sohl«Ml«. KeRenry, tit, May 16th, 1885. A, SALOON and RESTAURANT Buck's Old Stand, McHKNItY, ILLINOIS. Pine Kentucky Liquors, French Bitter, McHenry Lager Beer, TTM Ifllwankss BM>, -AND- J. the Bottle or CM* We buy none but the best and aell at Reasonable Prices. Call and see me and I will me 943 veil. f ANTONY ENGELN. McHeniy, 111., 1886. Agents Wanted! Tom TftK GBEAT WSW BOOK, 'The World's Wonder*- By S. W. Ssei. The most snecesssnl anbscription book erer •ubllshed. Over hoi/ a million copiett were told the patl eight month*, and it is selling three times as fast now as ever before. Begular canvassers clear from |)S to $3&, (M and fM Er dav. Nothing like it was ever known tn e history of book publishing, Jhro.f* tent Ktt on appUoatton. No experience needed to suresueoess. We help persons without ' Means to do a large business; no capital need­ ed. Write for tparticolars. Satarfm gvarmt- Ised to perteiu KM do not wUk to otmvatt on oon»- nMia We meaa business, and want live Meat* In every township. It willoost you ifohing to write for terms and full deacrip- ttons of our plans of doing business. We also mtm MMV R'I-book* to persons who send ts name* of book agents. Write for our list ; if free standard books. _ HRETOFTRCALPUBUSMMOOO. 4$$ * ill N. Third Street, St. Loaia,Mo. <Hw. SPRING GROVE III. JSales ot Stock, Farming Tools and Goods of all kinds attended to on the most mSOBABLI Rims, --AND Satisfaction Guaranteed. Call on or Address C. G. Andrews, Spring Crovef 111. tyring 3me, Sept. 80th, 1885. ll ll-3m PUMP REPAIRING, CEMENTING, ETC. The undersigned is prepared to do all jobs la the line of Digging Wells, Repairing Pumps, Cementing Wells, or will put in New On short notice and warrant satisfaction. In short will do all work in this line. Can furnish you a new Pump, either wood or Iron, warranted, as cheap at any other man. Good references furnished if desired, tf you want a Well Dug, a Pump Repaired or a new Pump, give me a calL WOrriers by Post Ollloe, Jonnsburgl attended to. < L. BANTES. Johns burgh. III., May 25th, liWS. VOBB For Coal and Wood --i--CALL ow- E M . H O W E , Opposite ISIaliop** lMLill, flw has a oomplete line of the best stoves'in the market, aa welt as a large stock of Hartiare, Mechanic's Tool!, riN, COPPER & SHEET IRON ARE, And, nijfret. every thiagpn the hardware <t*Te aad tin Uae. me WILL NOT BE UNDERSOLD. Qatl »t his store before buying elsewhere lobbing and repairing promptly attended to Wiemember; eitr* good barcaiaa oasal­ ways be obtained at Howe's. IsHnt;, Dae. l41M. M'HENRY, ILLINOIS, WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 29, 1886. KO. S. F. BENNETT, M. D. PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON. Also United JT States Ixuniuiai Surgeon. RIKIIMMI ultnols. MABT o. BARBIAN. HAIR WORKER. Ail kinds of Hair work done in first class sty le and at reasonable prices. Rooms a t residence, north­ east corner of Pnblic Square, McHenry, ILL DB. a K. WILLIAMS. TXVNTIST. Residence Dundee. Will be at Jku Parker House, the 10th lltb 86th Md S$tb of each month. When dates occur Saturday or Sunday I E®*? *«•$»• on the following Monday, and the first day of »uch visit occurs on Friday. I will stay but one day . Unitei States Var Clain Apncy OF WM. H. COWLIN, Woodstock, • • Illinois. Prosecutes all elassas and kinds of claims against the United States tor ex-Soldt.rs, their Widows, Dependent Relatives or Heirs. A specialty is made in prosecuting old and rejected claims All communications promptly answered If Postage Stamps are enclose'I for reply. 'WM, H. CO WLIN, Offlce at Residenee, Madison St., Woodstocc, Illinois. Attention Horsemen! I would • call the attentfion of the public to mj Stable ot Stock Horses, four in number: two Morgans, one 3-4Percheron, and one Imported Horse. They are all good representatives of their breed. Also a few Merino Sheep t • r sale. The public are cordially invited to call and examine stock, get prices, etc. No business done on Sunday. N. S. COLBY. MOHENRY, ILL E. R. BENNETT, M. t>., Late House Surgeon Cook County Hospital, RICHMOND* ILLINOIS, Special attention given to difficult Surgical cases. DEVTSVH UESPHOCHKN. Office at Residence of Dr. S. F. Benuelt SI for 13 Week# The POLICE GAZETTE will be mailed, <eeurely wrapped, to any address in the united Stales for three months on receipt of£ ONE DOLLAR. Liberal discount allowed to postmasters, agents and clubs. Sample copies mailed free Address all orders to BICHABD X. FOX," FKAHKLIH SQUAHK, New York. .WLUS, AILQB Soldiers* Department. CONTRIBUTED BT WM. H. COWLIN. HOLDS rllE FORT AS A « of A. M. CHURCH, Watohmnker and ̂ Jeweler NO. 65 FIFTH AVE., (Briggs House), Chi­cago, 111. Special attention given tore- pairing Fine watches and Chronometer^ 49*A Full Assortment of Goods in his line JOHN J. WINKLES. CARPENTER AND JOINER, Is prepared to do all work in his line on short notice and guar- entee sati faction. Will work by the job or day as desired, and do as good work as any man in the business. Orders lei't at his residence, Southeast corner opposite the Public School House, will receive prompt attention. Best of References given if de­ sired, JOHN J. WINKLES. McHKNRY, ILL.„ March 30th, 1888. J. P. SMITH, He makes Suits to order of the oest Cloths* Foreign or Domes- . • -I AT TSE lira PRICES i hat good G^oods can be $old ai HE ALAO County G. A. R. Directory. KtCRXOmHrOST WO 288. mh Smth.6 n9Wai Frtd%» eT*nln* Da. s.v, Bimn, Com. WOODSTOCK TOST. MO W8L eJahmontSI1 thlrd Monday evenings of GBOBOB ECKBBT. Com. WTOI TOST, KO , Meets the second and fourth Wednesdav evenings of each month. WK. BCTLBB, Com. HAH v AKDJPQST, MO M. Moots the secona and lourtn Mondar even hags of each month. DB. H. T. WooDau**. Oom. MABBMOO POST, NO. 169, HiMts every Second aad Fourth Friday evenings of each month. A. J. BorarOTOM, Oem. There art five ex-prisoners of war residing In the town ef Dorr. What other town In the ooanty has a forger number? Cleans and Impairs Clothes Neatly and oh short notice. (J-ive Jl^e a. Oa.ll AfcHenry. E| LAWLUS. fail. 19th, 1886. AX ®HE JACOB STAND, ETT, ^ALOOJi AND RESTAURANT, at the Old J stand, oj>i«)Hite Bisliop's mill, McHcnr>, 111. The choicest Wines, l.lquorn aivl Cijtsii to he foil ml in the county. Warm or cold meals on short notice op application. PHIL BEST'S MILWAUKEE KEEK by the Bottle or Case, always on liund. GOOD STABLING FOR HORSES. McHenry* - Illinois. <M fine a gtock of Watches, Clocks ami Jewelry As can be found in the County, which I offer M torices that can not be beat. . A Fine Stock ol 'choice cigars FANCY TOBACCO, STATIONERY, ' .BOX PAPER Musical IistrDU|| Instruction Books, oti Call and examine goods and learn prices. J. P. SMITH. McHanrv.Ill.. Mareh 1st. 188B. SMITHS BEANS /-VURE BlliOBsnsss; Sick Headache In Fovr hours. IG) One dose relieves Neuralgia. They cure and prevent Chills Fever, Sour Stomach Bad Breath. Clear the Skin, Tone the Nerves, and alve Life A Vigor to the system. Dose t ONE BEAN, fry them once and you will never be without them. Price, 28 cents per boWe. Sold bv Druggists and Sent on receipt of Medicine Dealers generally. price la ttaaips, postpaid, to any address, J. F. SMITH A CO., , and Sole Props.. ST. LOUIS. *0. JOHNSBURGH HENRY MILLER/ --DBAuro nr-- Foreip and Aierican Marble, Scotch and American Granite- MONUMENTS, TABLETS, HE A D8TODR8 CEMETERY COPING, ETC. JOHN8BVBGH, XJLJU Orders Solicited. Good Work Guaranteed. Post Office Addreds McHENEY, ILL. ' ̂TO CURE RHEUMATISM. TblP rftmodr ban a spern* action w.jrm the Of the bt)dy, Pupnlylnff moiMttire to tho tissueaarid hibrioatiijK the joints Attested by the (1i8ean<# N« st I AT or JDUIorled Unit** rentnin after a euro by this specific. A trial of u ginplo t»ottle will convince the most sceptical that we have not told half it® vir­ tues. Price 91*00 per bottle. For sale by all druggists. Manufactured only by LKNNEY MEDICINE CO.F CHKNOA. ILLINOIS. FOR THJE APIS --BY-- THOSE WHO KNEW HIM Flwn the obscurity of his boyhood to the rtateol his trngfe death, A nctv Bio^rapli v of the great Americsn Preeiilent, Irani a new stanil-point-- accurate and exhaustive In fact and Incident, replete with anec<tote. profuse and elegant |n illustration (100 engravings from original designs illustrating incident*, anecdotes, persons, Ac., including ,1C Steel Portraits.) Anonlfi antoH 8en(' for ful1 iwrticu. Myclllo AllItJIi inrs and for evidence that this Utlie most salable and pro 11 tattle book published ; or. to nave time, send $1.25 at once for Canvassing Book, and otntc vour choice of totvnslnps. Address N. D. THOMP­ SON PUBLISHING CO.. i 'ubb.. JLouia. Mo„ or New York City. A GIFT TO cOTits postagre and we will mail you free a royal, valuable, sample box o< goods that will nut you in the way of making more money at once, than tnything else in America. Both sexes of all igescn.n live at home and work in spare time, trail the lime. U«|)iUI not required We «rill start you. immense pay sure tor tho»> vho start at once. 3TIN«NOAO>. aloe nnWNQ' Patent 8elf- UUnJJO Adiustlng [IMP BOV ED.] Is the only perfect fitting, truly cpmfortible tnd healtn-preserviug Corset made. Hasan Slastic Section above and below a Corded Centerpiece. Entirely 1 liferent from any ither. Every Corset is'stamped and absolute 'v Guaranteed in evcrv particular. Be sure M>get the Downs Patent- Manufactured onlv >y the Gage-Downs Corset Co., Chieuro, and fr>r sale bv rtrst-cl.tss dry.gooils stores every. »here. Price S I .BO. SODA Best intheYTorla. - v - V If yoa want to learn how to Paint roar Buggy for One Dollar, cell at Bcaley's Drug Store, West Eud. There are about twenty ex-prlsonere of war In McBenry county. Are they In favor of organising a prisoners ot war association or olubf That's the question now before the house. Speak comrades for yourselves. In a skirmish during the war of the rebellion, Augustus Penney, a Main*- soldier, lost a linger, and afterwards wrote a rhyming dosorlptlon ofthr aflalrtehis wife. Iu lieu of othei evidence, these rhymes have been ao cepied at the Pension UtBue as prool ol Augustus's right to a pension. 1 see,' 'he said, as he met an old soldier oomrade at the City Hall yesterdaj, "that our Generals art having a hot dispute as to which oi them contributed the most to save tb< day at Gettysburg!). You were thier* i believe?" "Yes, but I have no rlgbi to talk." "For why?" "Because 1 was simply a private soldier, and oulj had tbrtt bullets shot Into meT,-- Detroit Free iVess. General Wheeler, ol Alabama now Congressman from the Eighth district, after gaining the reputation ef belug the most daring cavalry leader in tbt South alter J. £. B, titewart, steppe* from saddle Into the cotton field and from poverty has risen to be th» ricnest man In his state. Hla estate If- valued at nearly a million. General Gordon, of Georgia, made a fortuu* since the war, but lost It reoenti) through injudicious speculation. Fiv« years ago he was a mllllvnalre; to-da) be Is literally not worth a dollar General Johnson, United States Rail road Commissioner, has a snug lortum at-d a few other ex-Coufederao generals are worth a hundrod thousand or more--all made after laying dowi their arms. The old soldiers are load In tbeh praise of the remarks make at the Fall Sept. 16th, by Congressman Hopkins, They are more than ever satisfied am convinced that as far as their interest are concerned he Is the right man t< represent the 6th district. Mr. Hopkio- told the simple truth when talking oi the oubject of pensions. He knew ju*> what he was talking about, and ha> been where be could not fail to observ* the gross Injustloe and Ignorance dis­ played In the vetoing of a hundred oi more small Deaslon bills, and by tb« roan who hired a substitute to go^t* the front for him and then refused t< pay one cent to aid in the support oi the widow and fatherless children o him who lost ills life while performing services the president was not ma enough to do. Mr. Hopkins showe himself to be thoroughly posteJ snd I a forceable 'and eloquent speaker, th« champion of the rights of those wb< did service for their country and lir people, in thousands of cases lo^elii* limbs or otherwise being disabled fo> life, at la«t to be made fun of and ridi cuied for having been foolish enougl to do that which they believed to b> right and which saved this nation. We were pleased to notice a week or two ago tbat comrade 8. F. Bennett of Richmond, In his soldiers depart ment in the Richmond Gazette, advo cated the organizing of all ez-prisoo- ers of war residing in McHenry count) into an association, to work togetlie* with the National prisoners of wai Association, or any branch thereol It proved to us tbat some one is the county was interested and anxious to help get the survivors of rebel prison- pens together In some manner so thai those living In this county may be counted in, or placed on record. When comrade Bennett wrote this able arti­ cle for the Gazette, we bad reason to believe be was not aware that a large proportion of the ex-prisoners of war living Iu our oouoty were members of the Illinois State Assoolatlon, Head* Quarters at Chicago. Yet while such IS a fact there are bat one or two from this county that ever attended any meetings of the association, are not acquainted with Its officers and com­ rades from other sections, and conse­ quently as time passes, if not dro[ ped from the roll of membership are in a certain sense forgotten and are of io real benefit to the organisation mentioned. Comrade Bennett advo­ cated organizing/ a ooanty club or association, which we e.^nfess we irst thought would be inadvisable, knowing the number of members must be exceedingly small, even though every ex-pritoner of "war In the county should enlist in the cause. Also a few of those were prisoners for so short a period, that they seemingly take but little if any concern or inter­ est in such matters. Besides this jt Is Almost as difficult and expensive for some to put In an appearaioe at meet­ ings that may be held in the county at a point distant to at least two thirds of those who would be expected to attend, as to go to Chicago. Yet withal we have come to the conclusion that it wonld be well to have a county organization, as an auxilary or local association or club and to maet as often as convenient and practicable, become acquainted with one another and thereby be In position and ready to work tn nnlson for whatever may come up or any movement thought best to bring Into action by the National or State association, for in -Union there is Strength." A letter recently received by us from the 1st Vice President of the Illinois State Association, comrade C. D. Ramsey, advises organizing in every oounty lo the State as an auxlUry post or club to the State Association, stating that the offioers at Chicago will do all they can to aid in organising, Taat tf thought necessary the President, Sec retary or himself would come into the oounty at any point designated and isslst in the flaai organization. Now let us bear from other comrades on the subject. Let some one suggest where the first meeting ought to be. We will not do so at present for fear that we may be thought as having a personal pre fere noe in naming the point where the locality of suoh an Association should be organized. Dr. Robert St. G. Danfortfc,';,|i Washington, relates a curious expert- mce ot his own during the war of the rebellion, and later, while acting as a correspondent in the Franco-German sr. While serving in the first great struggle the Doctor was shot through the lungs and was an Invalid. He sub Mjqueutly went to Europe for bit- tealih, and remained there some years. When the German war broke out h«- •ecame correspondent for the New York Tribune^ and In one of the oattlea he was shot through the base •f the skull. He caught a heavy cold while lyiug wounded on the battle deld, snd his old wound in the lungi- roupled him so much that his life wa« llspalred of and be was a victim ol rapid consumption, One day during a violent fit of coughing the doctor irought up a piece of his overcoat vhtch had been shot Into bis lungs 10 rears before. The ejection of thi> -ause of Irritation so relieved hln bat be at once became better, and lually completely recovered. He re urned to Washington and has since teld the office of Judge of the Court •t Appeals. He was also a member oi he Board of Examiners and Assistant 'ommlssloner of Patents.--National lYibune. For the benefit of those persons who abor under the Impresson that there s no pension rated less than eighi iollars per month, and we have several • ntblselty whom one would suppose vould be better informed, we fur ilsh the following facts figures: .< ». PENSION BOLLS ANALYZED* In conformity with the latest oflfcttf' statement from the Certificate Divie on, U. S. Pension Office, the ratii.g* •er month of the 260.000 and mor» •enslotiers now on the rolls exhibit a* ollows: Gen. Black. Commissioner of Pen iors, fl00(by specltl act of Congress.) Then follow: 1 at 975: for loss of elti> -r both arm*, hands, feet, eyes, or fo* nsnnity. 823 at 972; for loss of arm o< eg below knee or elbow. 2 024 at 930: tor <oss of arm or leg above knee oi -ibrw |36 (these latter two rating it elude the $6 increase lately grante< r*y Congress;) for loss of arm st ->houMer-jo>nt 452. for loss of leg a Ip-jolnt. 10, together 464 at 946 io various other disabilities contracted n the service, there appear on the (tension rolls 834 at 950 per month. 1 it 948,1 at 947. 7 af. 94V 14 at 942. 1 a #40,25,1 at 940,1 at 938 50, I at 938 25 64 at 937.50 36 at 936. 7.927 at 930,4.48* it 916, 3 413 at 914,15.480 it 912, 9.297 it 910.15.776 at 98. 34,630 at |6,60$68 it 94. 26.134 at 92. and about 20.00(> receive the munificent sum of 91 a month, which, 11 deserved at all, seeme too little, otherwise too much! Ike Veterans. ROCK ISLAND. 111., Sept. 17.--The nineteenth anoual reunion of the Army of the Tennessee is at an end, ami It terminated with a banquet last evening at whi< h covers were laid for 300. At the business session In the morning General M, M, Force, of Cin­ cinnati, was selected as the orator for next year, and Colonel August A- Jaco son, of Chicago, alternate. The following officers were elected. President. General W. T.Sherman; Vice-Presidents. Colonel J. F.Howe, of St. Louts; Captain W.D, Leach of Cedar Raptds; Captain C KLonstrom of Galesburg; Msjor Charles H Smith, of Cleveland; Msjor A V Bohn, of Leadville, Col.; Surgeon S C Plummer, •f Bock Island;Captain CCCfcadwlck. of Detroit; Lieutenant J W Rosedale, Kan.; Colonel Edward Wolf, of Roshville lad.; Capli§ji| ^ 'bpaer.of Minneapolis; aad eral B Hogan of Des Moines; i secretary, Colooel L M Dayton;< ponding secretary. General A < edlooper; treasurer. General M Foroe. It was voted to meet aext'yeair j||§ Detroit on tte second ;Wedt September. The president thorlzed te appoint a oomt five to consider the propodtfaaJ establish a headquarters for the i ty and a permanent place of meet and to report at the next met After resolutions of thanks to the people of Rock Island, the Rawlina monument Committee and ChetWin had been passed, GeH|i Sherman closed the proceedings wi|jk a short address. '/r:^ 1 < --m ^ \ 9VHaines' monkey-shines te have created a general dlsgcil} 4 among the Democrats of this district, and outside of it too. as cot a solitary Demooratio paper has a word to say Is his favor. They have dropped Ml, Haines can now proceed as an "Iade~s: pendent." and a mighty small pro ess slon he will lead to the polls this year. As a political fugler he fugled his laat fugle at Woodstock, and played h«a last joke on the Democratic party of this district, to all . appearanees. Haines* creed as an Independent con­ sists of three words--E'ijah M. Halnee --first, last, and alt the time. Hie career as Speaker of the HOCKO ex­ hibited the man, and was just as fiercely denounced by members ot his own party as by the Republicans. *vi Public business was obstructed, tha - % nession lengthened, and the House re­ solved Into a perfect bear-garden for weeks, his rull-igs contributing to the chaos. He will never get into tbat *pet again. T ê DeKalb Chronicle (Den\) makes the following note oa dames: The good pedple of the heretofore Haines' bailiwick have set down on hat biped. The next legislature will . lave to do without nim. > :i • He Didn't 8ee Where The Fua OSM Is. "Talking about greenhorns," said a Ohio»go salesman, "let me tell you* <tory. Last week I was lo the ttore_ when one of oar country customers ^ame In. As he was In my territory It ^ tell to me to do him the honors of the ' '•% own at the house's expense. First, we rV went to a swell restaurant, took a pri­ vate room, and ordered a nice lunch. Before long I wanted another bottle* tnd at the waiter was not lo, and aiy trlend from the country was sitting tandy to the electric button. I remark- M 'Please give the waiter's button a whack, and we'll have another bottle. We started out for some fun, and we're. ^olng to have It.' v - MThen 1 winked at my oostomer, and ie seemed to eatch on, for he winked tack at me and looked just as if he was he very mau to enjoy a lively night* I e d i d n ' t t e u c h t h e b u t t o n , b u t a s ! • ' was disposed to be polite I thought I would give him all the time he wanted. , "In a minute or two the waiter, a big ^trapping colored man, came In of hla ^ •wn accord to see how we were getting .long. Imagine my surprise when my " {uest jumped up from his chair, hsuled •If, and before 1 could say a word gave he waiter a snug thump right on the C ulddle button of his dress coat, The. waiter didn't know of the blunder, and lidn't stop to give me a chance to ex­ it ain. He rallied, caugbt my country ; f riend by the collar and the totM of hla < rousers and threw him through the M i .If open door of the private room aad ; <ent him sprawling into the main part »f the restaurant. While 1 WAS calming lie irate waiter by tellin; him all tbout It my customer picked himself " tp, slunk back Into the room when be ^ aw that the colored man had finished >is exercise with him, fell In a heap la ils chair and blurted out: "'Say, I whacked him one oa the tut ton, but»ril be durued if I see where he fun comes In.' "--Chicago Jftrafet Train Talk. According to the Salem (Ore.) Talk there are fifteen men In the city f Portland just In the prime of life worth a million or more. These men went to Oregon without a doll r, and ny fortunate real estate and land spec­ ulations, rather than frugality, have imassed their huge fortunes. Two of he men referred to nave never crossed rhe Oregon border, or only to visit Washington Territory, since 1880. Such opportunities may arise again ta tb* state, say* the paper from which we quote, but not la the Immediate future. flrA clltsen of Clayton. Oa^lorti valuable dog, and suspeoted tbat he had fallen Into a deserted mining shaft. He could neither see nor hear anything of him at the bottom of the sixty-foot hole, but when he let down a pleoe of meat oa a string soosething •bit'* aa greedily as a saraaao trout. Then a miner went down, and sura enough the dog was there, and after being drawn up was found to ha unhurt. ••••••-- Remember the fact tbat W. H, Dwtgbt wtll not he nidernoid by a*y hoeee lo Woodstock or McBenry Co* A i ' ,v>v-