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j ...... V".'J-:- IK® BY THE.XATK BEN: PERLEY POOBX. Bishop Doggett of ^the Mathcxlist Episcopal Church South told a story r/%k y about a membor of the colored con­ ference in Tennessee, named Willis. playatl traant so that he conld hint it km Mh barrels ia front of tha down- toira office*. Business men had tin souls worried out of them bv young •ters begging for stamps. When the fa'mlous generosity of the Queen be­ gan to be doubte l, a new story was cir t • • • ftr: '&&*' --ar: M,™ I * hogshead, and somewhat resembling ; for tbe regt of her Hfe | ,4 One. He was advanced in years, ot j ha<l collected the fj, deep piefcv, without educations of tie- ~~ fe *\\ cided ability, and perfectly black. He I',. - arose on tite left of the bishop and •aid, "Bishop, may I speak?" Knowing as soon as Rhc - -- 1,000,000 stamps. Iben people weut around collecting stamps for the mythical old lady. Thi craze soon died out. It was alwayc 4, . - - . . - i Pupj)osed to have been originated hi the prevalent penchant for speaking, , dealer8 wLo took tbis way « boomin' the bishop replied, That depends the trade in postage stamps. The butter "That upon the nature of the subject." He replied, "It is in order." "Proceed, then," said the bishop. He commenced by Baying, "I want to open a daguerro- fad followed. Xo one seemed to know how many buttons had to be collected on a string before the task was accom­ plished. It ranered from 1,00 J to 1,000,-- ying, _ SST" iSl St11' ' °°^ ftcc°'ding to the success of the col m A de^n'^ j lector. While the fever lasted many • and enigmatical exordium. As ludi- . fond father went to work with \h ZZliTJl Tarin nWM ll 7tU ' clfAhQ* pinned on. The last craze wa* SIS1£«r5£J1£* fWa8 tl,af h® ! f°r business cards. It was almost uni SfSl!* JBS» ' followed but soon died out. i ortunes were made and lost in the • to the contemplation of the audience. " That picture was the relation in which - the Rev. Thomas Taylor had stood to , • them for three years. He delineated his , t^eme wittl force and beauty, melting Mx* into tenderness as he proceeded, great p0 ; pearly tears rolling down his duiky -.,r '4 cheeks. His tribute was positively v eloquent. He concluded • by offering a ^, C resolution that Brother Taylor be re- 'ff quested not to dissolve his relation '-with this colored conference. The V4* bishop forgot and forgave what he I" ^ thought the ignorant blunder of his ;&"• first sentence. He <li<l "open adaguerro- r-, ' type" most effectually, and maintained jfc,<•" his credit as an original orator. Mr. Pettigrew, of South Carolina, was as famed for repartee as for legal acumen. On one occasion he entered the Court of Common Pleas, Albeville District, clad in a linen summer suit manufacture of ohromo advertising cards." Sleeplessness In to the proper'length ol time for sleeping, and the cause ol sleeplessness the London Lance< says: "Practically, man should sleep until he is refreshed. The mistake many persons make is in attempting to gov­ ern what must be a matter of instinct by volitional controL When we are weary we ought to sleep; and when we wake we should get up. There are no habits more vicious than adopting measure? to keep awake, or employing artifices, or, still worse, resorting to drugs and other de- induce vices, to induce or prolong sleep , Dozing is the very demoralization ol He had to take a jury suit at once, and j the sleep function, and from that per* ~~1" * -- 1 nicious habit arises much of the so-, borrowing a black robe from a fellow- barrister, went at it. Carolina has ail the old English form and fuss, and the judge said: "Mr. Pettigrew, you have on a light coat You can't speak." Pettigrew replied: "May it please the bench, I conform strictly to the law. Let me illustrate: The law says that a barrister shall wear a black gown and coat, and your honor thinks that means a black coat?" "Yes," said the judge. "Well, the law also says the sheritf shall wear a cocked hat and sword. Does your honor hold thfct the sword must be cocked as well as the hat?" ; jHe was permitted to go on. called sleeplessness--more accurately, wakefulness--from which multitudes suiter. "That day is not the time to sleep is evident upon the face of the fact that nature has provided the night, wherein no man can or ought-to work. Instead of trying to lay down arbitrary rules as to the length of sleep, it would be wiser to say: Work while it is day; sleep when you are weary, which will be at night if the day has been spent in honest and energetic labor. When you awake, rise; and if the day's work I has been sufficiently well done, the Alexander Dumas, the French novel- ! time of waking will not be earlier thau ' isfc, had a country-se.it at Marly, near " Paris, not far from the rural homes of Rachel, the actress, and Vatte mare, the ventriloquist, who came to this country to establish a system of literary ^exchanges. Dumas called his place v "Monte Cristo," and his study was de- .vised in such an ingenious wav as to in- ;.sure absolute privacy. Hard-working sunrise. Tbe difficulties about and sleeplessness--apart from dreams --are almost uniformly fruits of a perverse refusal to comply with the laws of natura Take, for ex­ ample, the case of a man who cannot sleep at night, or rather, who, having fallen asleep, wakes. If he is what is called strong-minded he thinks, or per- p-5; editors might adopt the plan, and find ! haps he reads, and falls asleep again. > their comfort wonderfully improved. It j The repetition of this lavs the founda- stood a short distance from the main tion of a habit of awakening in the building, was lighted only from the j night, and thinking or reading to in- top, and was surrounded by a pretty J duce sleep. Before long the thinking ' "wide ditch, filled with water. There j or reading fails to induce sleep, and -.was no access to it save by a regular habitual sleeplessness occurs, for portcullis, the mechanism of which 1 which remedies are sought, and mis- •was in the hands of the occupant of | chief is none. If the wakeful man the study, who, by means of some ^Jsimple contrivance, conld lower or raise '-St at wil1. A small lucarne in proper mediaeval style gave the person within opportunity of observation and recon- Sfjnoitering. It was a clever expedient •|to keep off bores and duns. The novel- ; ist had endless jokes about this ditch, "Jwhieh he loved to telL "It gave," lie •would say, "perfect security from in would only rouse himself on waking, and get up and do a full day's work of any sort, and not doze during the day, when next the night came round, his sixteen or twenty hours of wakefulness would be rewarded by a sleep of nine or ten hours in length; and one or two of these manful struggles agaipst a perverted tendency to abnormal habit would rectify the error or avert the trusion, and with it such opportunities I calamity. The cure of sleeplessness for revenge. If a theatrical critic i must be natural, because sleep is a (abused me, all I had to do was to in- j state of natural rhythmical functions. |veigle h:m# out, get him once on the ! You cannot tamper with the striking ridge, and then, even if he was a mem- j movement of a clock without injuring jtaer of the Academy of Sciences, souse f,'* , lie must go, a la tour d.e Nesle, plump L' Into the water. I could get up at any Ite jtime a regularly acting epic. The fish in it were ever so fat. Talk to me v Jibout your Iloman fish ponds! No & slave could ever have been as succu- -ient a morsel as a well-to-do Parisian bourgeois. There was one carp there .who had swallowed a tailor and a boot- inaker, but who died at last of surfeit from my hatter." Dr. J. C. Hall, who died at Wash­ ington a few years since, after having practiced there for many years, at­ tended Gen, .Jackson on several oc- j casions, though not his family phy­ sician. It was one of the doctor's pe­ culiarities that he did not trouble him­ self with money matters, and was care­ less about collecting fees. Once, how­ ever, during a temporary absence, his ulerk made out some bills, and among Others sent one to the President On }iis return the doctor found a note from , s|G-en. Jackson, enclosing a check for the amount, deducting an old charge Which had been called for and settled, *nd for which he held a receipt The fact that the bill had been sent was not less a mortification to Dr. Hall than ihe error in the account itself. But on looking at the President's check he found that the General had forgotten to sign it. He therefore returned it, with the expression of his regret that tbe bill had been sent, and pointed out the General's omission. The check it, and you cannot tamper with the or­ derly recurrence of sleep without im­ pairing the very constitutson of things unon which the orderly performance of that function depends." 11 ' 1 _ X Spicy Definition*. , A smart, pithy, or humorons defini­ tion often furnishes a happy illustra­ tion of the proverbial brevity which is the soul of wit Here are a few apt ones that are evidently spontaneous: A boy once said that "dust is mud with the juice squeezed out." A fan, we leara from another juve­ nile source, is "a thing to brush warmth off with," and a monkey "a small boy with a tailsalt, "what makes your pptatoes taste bad when you don't put any on," and ice, "water that stayed out late in the cold and went to sleep." A schoolboy, asked to define the word "sob," whimpered out: "It means when a feller don't mean to cry and it bursts out itself." A youngster was asked to give his idea of the meaning of "responsibility," so he said: "Well, supposing I had only two buttons on my trousers and one came off--all the responsibility would rest on the other button." To hit off a jury as "a body of men organized to find out which side has the smartest lawyer," is to satirize many of our "intelligent fellow-country­ men." The word "suspicion" is, in the opin­ ion of a jealous husband,"a feeling that ^as duly signed and sent back enclosed ! compels you to try to find out some- in a note with this remark ^ "Dear Doctor, the beat of men is liable to Sue take. Andbew Jackson." Dr. Hall testified to the old hero's kindness to his people, especially to his Servants. Once when the smallpox |>roke out among them, and nearly everybody else fled, the President re­ mained in the White House, and waited ttpon black and white with unremitting attention. - . Jekes on the Credohw. : "A« far back as I can remember," - Said a gentleman who devotes his leis­ ure to the collection of curios, "every Bow and then a hoax has appeared and lteen implicitly believed in by tbe pub­ lic. But so many hoaxes have bean sprung npon the community of recent years that people are more skeptical than they used to be. The first hoax I remember that was generally be­ lieved in that jewelers would pay ®5 a pound for cigar ashes. This craze Was in vogue all over the wuntry, and people used to carry little boxes around With them to collect the ashes in. Few •vet undertook to find out whether the story was true Until he had a pound of ashes oollected, and then, of course, it was too late. Many sensible people pur- •ned this fad, although a moment's consideration would show that no jew­ eler in his sober senses would clean precious metals with a gritty com­ pound. People who wrote to the pa­ pers for information in regard to the nondescript jeweler were consoled with the knowledge that cigar ashes made •n excellent if rather disagreeable dentifrice. Then came the story that Queen Vic­ toria would give £1,000 to each person collecting 1,000,000 old postage stamps. This appealed directly to the heart/of ""a thing which you don't wish to know. A good definition of a "Pharisee" is "a tradesman who uses long prayers and short weights;" of a humbug, "one who agrees with everybody," and of a tyrant, "the other version of some­ body's hero." A lady's idea of a ballet girl was "an open muslin umbrella with two pink handles," and a Parisian's of chess, "a humane substitute for hard labor." Thin soup, according to an Irish mendicant, is "a quart of water boiled down to a pint, to make it strong." Of definitions of a bachelor: "un- altared man," "a singular being," and "a target for a miss," are apt enough. A walking-stick may be described as "the old man's strength and the young man's weakness," and an umbrella as "a fair and foul weather friend who has had many ups sad downs ia the world." ' . Lead-Poisonfng Cumulative. Writing of the poisoning of water by lead pipes Alfred H. Allen, President of the English Society of Public An­ alysis, says: "The proportion of lead which is generally considered to ren­ der water seriously objectionable is l-20th of a grain per gallon. It must not be supposed, however, that there is any danger in drinking a glass of water containing such a minute pro­ portion of lead. It is not the single dose or a dozen doses which will pro­ duce any ill effects, but the constant use of such contaminated water. Lead is a cumulative poison, and each suc­ cessive dose becomes stored up in cer­ tain organs of the body until the poison­ ous effects ensue. Further, it must not be supposed that every one is equally susceptible to the effects of lead, there being a great difference in this respect. Hot water acts much more vigorously am 1aoj4 nuva fhon tf THS BODY VAjmmiBi ftfft AIR. ReMrinble I>i*»|>p«M4Laa«rtlM Corpse ol * Young Mam In tllia, Ohf«. On the morning of the 14th day of August, 1872, Charles J. Reid, a young man of twenty-five years living at Xenia, O., fell dead While walking across the dining-room in his fa£!tex*« house. The family consisted of his father, toother, two sisters, and a cousin, a boy of fif­ teen. All were present at the breakfast table when Charles entered the room, says A. G. B. in the SsA Francisco Ex­ aminer, but instead of taking his ac­ customed seat near the door by which he had entered, passed it and went ob­ liquely toward one of the windows-- with what purpose no one knows. He had passed the table but a/few steps when he fell heavily to the floor and never again"breathed. N The body was carried into a bed­ room and, after vain efforts at resuscita­ tion by the stricken family, left lying on the bed with composed limbs and covered face. In the meantine the boy had been hastily dispatched for a phy­ sician, who arrived some twenty min­ utes after the death. He afterward re­ membered as an uncommon circum­ stance that when he arrived the weep­ ing relations--father, mother, and twe sisters--were all in the room out of which the bedroom door opened, and that door was closed. There was no other door to the bedroom. This door was at once opened by the father of the dece&sed, and as the phy­ sician passed through it he observed the rigid outlines of the body under the sheet that had been thrown over it; and the profile was plainly discernible under the face-cloth, cl^ar-eut and sharp, as profiles of the dead seem al­ ways to be. He approached and lifted the cloth. There was nothing there. He pulled away the sheet Nothing. The family had followed him into the room. At this astonishing discovery --if so it may be called--they looked at one another, at the physician, at the bed, in speechless amazement, forget­ ting to weep. A moment later the three ladies re­ quired the physician's care; all had fainted and fallen to the floor. The father's condition was but little better; he stood in a stupor, muttering inar­ ticulately and staring like an idiot. Having restored the ladies to con­ sciousness the physician went to the window--the only one the room had, opening upon a garden. It was locked on the inside with the usual fastening attached to the bottom bar of the up­ per sash and engaging with the lower. No inquest was held--there was nothing to hold it on; but the physician and many others who were curious as to this remarkable occurrence made the most searching investigation into all the circumstances, but without re­ sult Charles J. Reid was dead and "gone" and that is all that is known to this day. Two Anecdotes of the Late Emporor. Here are a couple of anecdotes of the late Emperor Wilhelm. One day he was inspecting the gardens at Babels- berg, accompanied by a young gar­ dener. He noticed that the latter showed an ever-increasing anxiety and preoccupation, and seemed to find dif­ ficulty in attending to his royal master. "Tell me, now, straightforwardly, my good fellow," said the Emperor, "what is troubling you?" The gardener theu told him he was an "Einjahrig" volun­ teer, and that at such an hour, dearly approaching, he was due at the bar* racks at Potsdam. "Then put on your uniform ami hurry off as fast as your legs can carry you." When the gar- soldier reappeared the Emplror was in his carriage; he told him to - • - • • - ^ ^ jump in, and ordered the coach than to drive his fastest. When they arrived at tbe barrack yard the hour had al­ ready struck. "Herr Hauptmann," said the Emperor to the officer in com­ mand, "I have brought you this lag­ gard, but when you are setting his punishment do not forget that all the blame is due to me." When the Czar Alexander II. visited Wilhelm at Ems they used to sit down in the Brunnen promenade and chat to­ gether. As soon as it became known that the two great Emperors could be so easily seen the promenade quickly became crowded. The Czar was troubled and irritated by the public curiosity, and wished to move away, but the Kaiser never felt any distaste for the loyal swarming of the German people. However, one morning, in order to comply with the Czar's wish, he rose to go, when he caught sight of Prince Bismarck ooming along the promenade^ "Ah," said he, "now we shall have quiet" "Why so?" asked the Czar. "Look there," responded the Kaiser, pointing to Bismarck, "yonder comes the man whom they will think a greater sight than either o~f us. When the people catch sight of Bismarck they will run after him and leave us alone." They Were Waiting for Him. What funnv things a man in the box office sees. The other day I was in the treasury department of a theater for a while, says a writer in the Chicago Mail. Among the people in line was a cliap whose make-up indicated that he was in the city to see the sights, "I would like to have one of your best seats," he said, as he looked in at the window just as a chicken in a coop looks at a grain of corn it can't reach." "Dollar and a half." was the reply. "Got any cheaper?" "Oh, yes, got 'em for a dollar, seventy- five, fifty, and twenty-five cents," . "Gimme a fifty-cent ticket.* "All right; there you are." J " "Has the show begun yet?" "Not yet" "How long before it will begin?** v "Just as soon as you get seated,* said the treasurer in a way that was matter-of-fact "We have been wait­ ing for you." "Hey ?" said the countryman. "I say we have been waiting for you. I was afraid you wouldn't come. Please step in so as not to keep the companr waiting." The countryman looked at the treas­ urer for a half minute and then asked: "How did you know I was comin'?" So Use. What a woman doesn't know about newspapers isn't worth-knowing. The other morning Mrs. B. was talking to her husband. I notice by the Tribune that Mr. Jones died on Sunday." Q"It is a mistake, my dear," teplied the husband, "he died Monday." "But the paper said Sunday." "I knew it, but it was an error in the print" "I thought so too, at first, but I got a half dozen copies of the paper, and it was the same in all of them. They certainly couldn't have made the mis­ take over and over again." The husband tried to convince her, but it was no use, and he gave it upt-- 1 -; ™ " • * . r # " " M * . ' v . WKh •w&lmpaftstttfuKtlwBMth» iiTw,an oCcotoMvroftKMM^ SMta** bodily 4tatori>- aiic*. Whw It MlaxM tti Mcrativo and diitrib- Btiw MttTlty.Mi* grtt into the blood and Uncos tti« akin and whit® of tb» with yel­ low, Um bowel« bccoms constipated, the tonga* ooated, tk* breath tour. Then coma head- achM, mUgo and congestion oi the organ, ao- computed with pain in it* vicinity or under the right shoulder blade. Khali blue pill be the (•mody conghtT_No, lor mercury in any form te paraieiou* What then? Kxper-ence indt catea Hoetotter'e btomach Bitters an the tmo remedy tor inactivity of the liver, it not onlv relajcee the bowels without pain, but litis a di. reet stimulating effect npon the hepatic *'and itself, the Mat and origin ot the trouble All malarial complaints involve disorder of the liver, %nd of t&Me the Bitter, is the most popu­ lar coratiTe. It also conquers dvKpe)lt,iB, rler- i vousneas, rheumatism and kidney troubles. T he puzzling terms that are used in describing electrical measures and forces are derived from the names of men famous in the field of electrical research. They are thus defined in The Electrical Review: Michael Fara­ day (English), 1 Farad, unit of capaci­ ty; James Watt (English), 1 Watt, ac­ tivity; James P. Joule (English), 1 Joule, work; Charles A. Coulomb (French), 1 Coulomb, quantity; Andre M. Ampere (French), 1 Ampere, cur­ rent; G. S. Ohm (German), 1 Ohm, re­ sistance; Carl F. Gauss (German), 1 Gauss, magnetic field; Yolta (Italian), 1 Volt, pressure. One Dyne is the unit of force. The strongest dynamo field is about 100 Gausses. "1 am weary of living" moaned poor Mrs Black, "For I'm fairly worn out with the ache in mjr back; * My nerves are a chain Ot weakness and pain. And my poor head ia aching as if it would crack." "Now, dont be discouraged," cried cool Mrs. White, "It Is never so dark but there's promise of li&ht> I can tell yon, in brief. * ' What will give you relief-- Pierce'e Favorite Prescription will soon set yon right." It is the only remedy for woman's peculiar weaknesses and ailments, sold by druggists, uuder a positive guarantee from the manu­ facturers, that it will give satisfaction in evt ry case, or money will be rclundel See guar­ antee on bottle-wrapper. Large bottles il(K> doses) tl; si* for 95. W hen the first electric telegraph was established the speed of transmission was from four to five words a minute with the five-ueedle instruments. In 1SA9 the average rate for newspaper messages was seventeen words a min­ ute. The present pace of the electric telegraph between London and Dublin, where the Wheatstone instrument is employed, reaches 462 words; and thus what was regai-ded as miraculous sixty years ago has multiplied a hundredfold in half a -centurv. . c :-- (u. / Don't fm K»otr«,, v that yon dannot afford to neglect'thai <«t«rrhY Don't you know that it may lead to consump­ tion, to insanity, to death Don't you kn.»w that it can be easily cured? Don't you Know- that while the thousand and one nostrums vou have triel have utterly failed that Dr. Stge'n Catarrh Remedy is a certain cure? It lias stood tha tent of years, and there are hundreds of thousands of grateful men and worn^n in all parte of the country who can testify to ita efficacy. All druggists. I n Denmark all the girls are trained in agricultural duties. It is said that some of them can swap, horses better than the boys. ^ W e don't see the propriety of wearing a solid gold stud in a merely plaited shirt bosom. W AT I call a dilemma am hol'In' a mad goat byde hawna wid no fence at han'.-- The Judge. Can a Man Swaltorr a Cannon-Dallf Well, "that depends * He can if his throat is large enough and the cannon-ball not too large. The question reallv seems wortnv of some consideration in view "of tha siz< of i>ome of the pills that are prescribed for snfferiiifr humanity. Why not throw them "to thadoM," and take Dr. Pierce's Pleasant Purgative Pel- pertectiy harmless, in glass, and alwaya fresh. F ortcnatelv for poets they ara born, not made. Were it otherwise the law might interfere.--Life. Bow to Gain Slosh and Strength. Use after each meal Hcott's Emulsion with Hypophosphites. It is as palatable as milk, anu tasiiy digested. The rapidity with which delicate people improve with its use is won- derfuL Use it and try your weight. As a remedy for Consumption, J hroat affections, and Bronchitis, it is unequaled. Please read: "1 used Scoit's Emulsion in a child eight months old with good resulte. He sained four Sounds in a very short time.'i ho. 4'kiu, L !>., Alabama. THE careless man escapes many dan* gen.--Judge. . • , Coming Events. If you desire to attend any of the follow­ ing important meetings, avail vou revives of the splendid train service und !"*v rates of fare offered by the "Burlington Bonte," C.. B. & Q. It. B. Tickets will be sold at ono fnre for the round trip, from any station on the line, as follows; June 1G to i», 18S9, and from Iowa points, June 13 (!»ut in no case Juno 14 or 15), for the National Republican Convention, at Chicago, opening June 19; pood to return, until June 25, inclusive. June 11 to 14 '(tod from points within 200 miles of 8t. Louis on the 15th. and for trains arriving in St. Louis on the morning of the 16th) . for the North American Saengerbund Biennial Festival, to be held at St. Louis, June 13 to 16: good to return until June 19. inclusive. June 8 to 11. for the Biennial Session of the "Supreme Lodge of the Knights of Pythias, tolte held at Cincinnati June 12 to 16; good for going passage nntf' June 13. and for return p;is- ; until June 19, inclusive. June to July 13, inclusive, for the Na­ tional Educational Association meeting, at San Francisco: good for going passage until July 18. and with final limit for return pas­ sage 90 days from date of sale. For ticket®, general or further information regarding the above, apply to any ticket agent of it*1 lines, or address Paul Mokton. General Passen­ ger and Ticket Agent C., B. & Q. B. B-, Chl» cago. Illinois. WEII.S* HATK BAlSAt. If gray,gradually restores color ; elegant tonie dressing, rtc , oo, Drutgint», or il.Oi ei^e vre- {>a ti bv Express for SI. K. S.VV«1I«, Jersey City. tOL'Gb UN PiLKb. <t>uick, compute our*. SOe. W ht call a man a crank, when no one can turn him? LOOK TOlIXG! Leanrere Oil prevents tendency to Wrinkles or ageing of Skin. Preserves a youthful plump, fresh condition of leaturea. It you desire a transparent, clear, fresh Complexion, free .ram bletmth, or roughness, use Leaur lle Oil, it cures and prevents cracking, chapping, rcugh- ness. or coarseness of skin. Keeps face, neck end hands soft, plump. Preserves tuo tone, life nnil transpi.rent glow of the skin a* in youth. Ttii<4 is a reautrkahle article: ti.oueh called an oil is more tU«natiireof an expressed juice, and is a supeVb tonic an<l elegant drvssmg *vr the Hair and it lut-lctr . -which it stimulate* and tones without grease; yet keeps tn< hair and whiskers soft, giossv, luxurious and vigor­ ous. $1 at Druck'ists or by Express, free of K*- praes charge. E.&Wgixs.Chemist, Jersey City. tnraaioHTEK your old boot* and shoes with Lyon's Keel buffeners, and wear them again. r , i % * , ; * > i f * , / U •L Jav-. ss* .*> ...fi.,T. S V -^£....<1 .*£ .*'t "U * Biliousness Is more general at tins scstoa than any other. Dm bitter tu»te, o(TeuAv^ breath, coated tongne, sick headache, < rowsiuess. dizziues* and loss ot appetite mate the victim miserable and disagreeable to others. Hood's Sarsaparilla combines Uie best anti-hilioas remedies < f the vegetable kingdom, in sneh propor* tioii ax to derive their best medicinal effects with the lease disturbance to Uie whole system. This prepa­ ration is so well balanced in its actions upon the alimentary canal, tha liver, the kidneys, the stomach, the bowtls and the circulation of the blood that it brings abont a healthy action of the entire human organism, restores the appetite, and overcomes that tired leelicg. Hood's Sarsaparilla Bold by all druggists. >1; six for $5. Prepared only by C. i. HOOD st CO.. Apothecaries, Lowell. Mass. ***** Bftaaa Dnllar WHY" do I have this drowsy, lifeless feeling ? WHY do I have Backache ? WHY Neuralgia and Rheumatism ? WHY does Scroful­ ous taint and Erysipelas show itself? BECAUSE your blood is filled with Poison, which must be Com­ pletely Eradicated before ,you can regain health. You must go to the root of the matter. Put the Kid­ neys--the great and only blood puri­ fying organs--in complete order, which is complete health, and with Warner's Safe Cure and WARNER'S SAFE PILLS your Cure is Certain. WHY do we know this? BECAUSE • 1 tens of thou­ sands of grate- m ful men and women in all f parte of the world have vol- untarily writ­ ten us to this • effect. There is no stand-still in disease. You are either growing Better or Worse. How 18 it With \ O U P WHY not to-day resort to that medicine, which has veritably Cured iSiliions, and which will cure you if you will give it a chance ? All pf Warner's preparations are Purely Vegetable. They are made on honor. They are time-tried. They are No New Discovery, Un­ tried and Worthless; on the trary, they have stood the test--they have proved their superiority. They stand alone in pre-eminent merit, and YOU KNOW IT. (2* OLD is worth two per pottnA, Pettit's Eye Salve VJ t'.OOu, bat ia sold at i5 cents a box by dealers. MENTION 1 HIS PAPM nt> vkrim ix» iBvcMuiai. P I S O ' S C U R L F O R C O N S U M P T I O N WHIM. Tcraw rasa. AJiti--, TM»> Co., Treated and cured without the knife. Hook on treatment «eut ir^e. Address F.I. POND, M.l) ,A<iron, Kane Oo.. 111. SPECIAL. s Whereas, From day to •»st numbers are baing stricll* en down with the fell diseaiip>:| Rheumatism, which seems w be greatly ou the increase. And whereas, The nation has within a short time beeii called upon to mourn the sudden loss of many of our public men, such as Vice Pres < ldent Hendricks, Gen. John A. Logau, See'y Daniel P. - Manning, Gen.] many ofiwn. Notp, therefore, I do, by virtue of the knowledge pos­ sessed by me, proeMa?lSij£i> recommend Hibbard'e Tftin rnatic Syrup to be a of great merit, both for Bhenmatism and all BlooA Diseases. And further, That this med­ icine be adopted as a national W. remedy by all. Signed by the: R H E U M A T I S M . I N F L A M M A T O R Y R H E O M A T O M . I was cnt in the wrist by a broken bottle, from which I Buffered extreme jmin, I called aooetor, who m-oupuucetl it sciatic rheumatism. Hy right •Me beciviue I'avalyzed, leg and arm badly with­ ered, and my joints were so stiff that there was btit little action in them. About six weeks ago I beaan taking Hibbord's Rheumatic Byray with marvelous results. Since then I have left ofl the nse of crutcheB entirely, and only use a cane, and for the past few days I often forget it and walk without any aid. To say that it has greatly ben­ efited me but poorly expresses mv idea of your immunarto Syrnp. C. I). Dknio, Dealer in General Groceries, Jackson, Mich. C. D. D15XIO is a nian well known in this community, and was probably the worst wreck physically of any man this country ever saw. He was paralyzed from rheumatic poison, and no one ever expected he would recover. He is well, and it is simply marvelous. Fran* Ij. Smith, Ex-Member State Legislature, Jacks My datifhtsr Moral had tism. Her limbs w ore badly swoUea. terrible a^ony. She has been j Syrup and using your Plasters, which j it up. The Syrup corrected iter 1 cleansed the rheumatic poison from and t he is now able to be around the 1L consider Hibbard's Rheumatic Syrnp tcrs remedies of great merit. Rev. J. Bobhkhl Pastor First M. E. Church, Fromoec^ IKMl tastwteter and spring I was a terrible safbn* from rheumatism iii my left shoulder SttASftMS.j- suffering the most excruciating pain. Twe«5R ties of of Hibbnrd's Rheumatic Syrup cared UMi I can with confidence recommend it to aU wlMfr are suffering with rherunatic difficulty. , t R ev. J amks B krrt, Morley, lCiek. No remedies known so highly endorsed hg ft&. home people, in the treatment of irheunialf"** and all Blood diseases. Our Medical Pamphlet, treating on Rheumatism and alt Blood 1hM> MALK Diseiiaea, sent free ou application. •on, Mich. Rheumatic Syrup Company, Jackson, iKtfc^ H i b b a r d ' s R h e u m a t i c lIMPIVUEf) in merit It is a S*FE FAMILY MEDICINE, because it cutltains no . Children, invnlidK a d deiicst? persons will find it the best mediciue and tonic tfaey »»»» fit . borne should be without it. Always iu season. Sirring, Summ t. Autumn awl Winter. If ;on cannot procure it ot yonr druggist, send direct to us. Prtas tl; 0 bottles risltsis.ipi!, A S U R F f i U R E F O R R H E U M A T I S M . MACtllXKS and RIM .TAITKUNK. or iii ikiutf jT.du'*, Mitunx. »t„'. Ma- l<-huic sent .•>'mail h<r$l. Semi lorlate redm-e i tuice-I.Kt. h KOSh A l\> . IV.lr.io, O'lio. DETECTIVES VuMii«nnCMal^. Bkrewt ants art *a4(rt«rtnrt!ena SB «vr secret BfrTMe. K*perivecc nemeeewery. ririicntwifri^ wraaaaa OstecUrs Bareaa C».M AteritkCtoelmtUL NEWENGIAND CONSERVATORY 0F MUSIC Boston, Mass. 4tb OF MY. Tt ose <-'«*!> it>? to ctlr-brataMU «ave of UiKidletren l.y a^dr--^- "- -i--*-- ' L* SOU. GANGER TF*AS I AMtl 3.800.000 arrrn best asricoV ^ I wAMw Lllllll turil unit irr^f-inp land for Halt Address.GODLK V i PORTKR.Ilnllaa.Tex. p K S8 • day. Samples wortli 11 .no, FRRB. kfk lines not under the horse's feet. Write Brewster Safety Rein Holder 0t>„ Holly, Mica iU-.N-flU-N THIS. t-APLK . TI*F I.AROE«T Beet rqnl|>ped In tnf W'urld--llu Tnrfnn tcirt. JS52 Studrnf la»t .v nr. Thor­ ough In»lniHh>n in Vorni and o*fJ Orjjara JV».i.i£>, Pi'it Arts, OrmlOTf, Urmmr*, Pmek, German a If ait tin Bronckis^ tirade. Tuition, $5 to : board #»'d r«n>jik vith $trcm and tk-ctnc Li^ht, to per wr< k. Kttll For - - -X«*r*n begins Sept I.% K full iiifr-nnttiart, j_ klir. BiFTON, iratcd Calendar, ot ujiKidieTren Uj iiTdirnninr, fof j.. B L'i'I'HAYFR.Agwto:Pyni'dL. Room is. 156 E. w«ah;nstea8t«< raw It TH* CRKAT T0BULM WELL MM PH0SKGTIR6 MCHIRE MM SnstBlteM ttasss ] srtsets. Ctialtass (Wil \ LOdMISAKIKAl T«W», OHIO. "OSGOOD" 0. E. CUrdard SctltL , Seut on triel. Freight |<tid. KvillvWarrsntcd. 3 TON $35. MARVI fA Uar:nle ^ t vc ot Fkiling Manli and Hlooc I Km CO., S. SUts St., Chicago, H SOLDIERS i _ ... . sud Ktrontr Nerve . ft i«'r bottle. Srvul by drivtt- Otlifr sires prcportio8» Illustrated Catalogue OMF STUDY JtocKkeepiwr.Bnnne** Forms, , rfU 1 ,P';niu:insljir.,Aritliiueti<-,Rliort. thorouifhiy tauplitWmail. Wrciilars iilUANT M lil'UKEKs COLLKO-a. liitffaio. N .Y. alt aet Pensions. !f 'i dlsa- Olllrerti' truvd pwrfc bounty collert«-d: I>e«ierter« relii-ved ; «ncrw»s or no fne. l.mvs sent a. w. BcCormiek 4c Bob. WMhinirton, )>.< .* (ii.rii>naU.O> ACftDTIIVr 111 BftM Forevery'-ody who mill UNCI 111 Klla« will preserve them by my method wlie-t they arn a od the inarkft, tnd mil wlirn dear. Send 5S5c for re­ cipe to t\ S. 1>AVISUN. Wis. ®S9t̂ y. LADY AGENTS <"m se<-nre permanent enii'loytn'nt st f.Vt to 41 0 per mouth»ell:nFQueen t'lty Sup- pi>i'i<-i-H. hami'le ont.it fnw. A.ldre-n riii. imisti Su->i>ouder C.i., it E. Ninth Kt..Cincinnati, O. SWEEPING THE HtRKETS! Moxie h*s created the prreatrst excitement, de­ mand and sale as H bereratre. in two years, ever wit nessed in the history of trade--from the fat-t that it brim's nenous, exhnnsted, overwi rked women to pood powers of endurance in a few days; cures the uncontrollable M p.'tite for liquor* and tobacco at oiu-e. and has recovcrtd a lar.e number of cases Of Old, helpless paralysis as a food only. Stely low. Agents well piid. free. Mention this Paper. QSSC031TEQMPSOK, Biajtontn, H. T. Or. Owen's Portable Battery FOR MAN AND WOMAN. Contains 10 decrees of Utengt". t'lirreut Cs»« hctiicresRed.ile- creseed.reversed or detached at will and lipiilkM to Unv purt of tKKiv or limb* by whole family. Cures Ocurrul, Nerv* «H« Ctarunle DUriiic*. Is light, simple inn) superior, tiuurantced for one Iisrcr Illnilrstetl iMrill.KT sent fVee. Dr. Owen Itelt Co., 10:* State St., Chicago* OLD 80LDHW8?i^W nd l.X PKltlMNl'Ki* tor ea< li insue ot TIIK .'IIICAOt# I.I IKiKll. One whole pu»:e i de- .v t. d to \V;»r Sketches even- wvek. und they an- all me to lite. Head tiiem. You c.»um>t fail t«) appre- •inte Hi cm, for they are luriin-H»<i by V" 4!id ••YAMK**' and mve interesting experiences in the I liion aad Couttderate annies. Send two Setter *t.mps£crs saiui>le copyot the t'CHt Family Story Pave? in the West. Only pet- iuar. iViUlrati t niCAUO LICIK<Ktt» Chicago, Hi. Price S6 DISCO1 , Wholly awltke artUMsl ay ' . jj t'ureor mind wamlerisf. is' i Any biMik learweil ia oas ~ of 10N7 at Ualttmore. 1 15<»0 Prilsdelphla, ills atW at lioxtoTi. Ur»te elapses ef Oolmabia Vale, Wellet-lor, Oberlia. DniTWsltr « itTHii 1'iuverxity. Chautauqna. Ate.,«e. _ Kk-kakd 1'Horroa tberic enttat,Hoas. Jiuiah p. Uknjamiw. Judge OiaeoK.JDr.] H. Cook. Priu. N. Y. wSteJiornial Taught by cortespoodesce. from PBO ot Pena_l >DAT*.l f.S. 0. II1.H. a^BnaiiMk Ns. M-nm WHKN WKITINO TO AOl la tk/spSper*' *°11 MW m JL PLEASAKT REMEDIAL P01E. VXJLI. 8TAXV OF EXPERIENCED PLYSICUHISBIIMIMIY lay CHRONIC DUEAtEt ceMflnlljr Treated wllhovft •Wiun' urn MD SUIIIULIKHTVTE, illicit, Beffale, 11. Tho treatment of Diseases el tbe Air Psnacei and Luuga, such as Chronic Catarrh In the Head* Laryngitis, Bronchitis, Ailhast and CoasnmptloUf both througrb correspondence and ut our institutions, constitutes an important specialty. I We publish three separate books on Nasal, Throat and Lung Diseases, which give much valuable in­ formation, viz: (1) A Treatise on Consumption, Laryngitis and Bronchitis; price, post-paid, ten cents. (2) A Treatise on Asthma,* or Phthisic, givinir new and successful treatment: prioe, post­ paid, ten cents. <3> A Treatise on Chronic Catarrh in the Head; price, post-paid, two cents. Dyspepsia, "Liver Complaint," Ob­ stinate Constipation, Chronic Diar­ rhea, Tape-worms, and kindred affcctions, are among1 those chronic diseases in the suc­ cessful treatment of which our specialists have attained great success. Our Complete Treatise on Diseases of the Digestive Orgrans will be sent to any address on receipt of ten cents in postage stamps. WRIGHT'S DISEASE, DIABETES, and kindred maladies, have been very largely treated, and cures effected in thousands of cases which had been pronounced beyond hope. These dis­ eases are readily diugnostieated. or determined, .by chemical analysis of the urine, without a .examination of patients, wlio can, therefore, DISEASES. DISEASES OF DISEASES. personal (enera . The study and practice of chemical analysis and microscopical (nation generally be successfully treated at their homes. examination of the urine in our consideration of cases, with reference to correct diagnosis, in which our institution long ago became famous, hafi naturally led to a very extenaive practice in diseases of tbe urinary organs. | These diseases should be treated only by a special­ ist thoroughly familiar with them#and who is com-Gum. DISEASES. DEB, STONE Gravel. Enlai I petent to ascertain the exact condition and stage I of advancement which the disease has made (which can only be ascertained by a careful chemical and micro­ scopical examination of tbe urine), for mcdicines which are curative in one staae or condition do posifit'e injury in others. Beiug in constant receipt of numerous inquiries for a complete work on the nature and curability of fyesc maladies, written in a Style to be easily understood, we have published a large. Illus­ trated Treatise on these diseases, which will be sent to any ad­ dress on receipt of ten cents in postage stamps. nFLAmHATlOX OF THE WLAD- 1N T|ffE BLADDEK, ri, (.marced Prostate Gland, eteatlon of (Trine, and kindred affec­ tions, may be included among those in the cure of which our specialists have achieved extraor­ dinary success. These are fully treated of in our Illustrated Pamphlet oh Urinary Diseases. Sent by mail for 10 cts. in stamps. STRICTURES AND URUVART FIS­ TULAS.--Hundreds of cases of the worst form of strictures, many of them greatiy agtrrarated by the careless use of instruments in the hands of inexperienced physicians and surgeons, causing false passages, urinary fistulas, and other complications, annually consult us for relief and cure. That no case of this class is too difficult for the skill of our specialists Js proved by cures reported in our illus­ trated treatise1 on these maladies, to which we refer with pride. To intrust this class of cases to physicians of small experience. Is a dangerous proceeding. Many a man has been mined for life by so doing, while thousands annually lose their lives through unskillful treatment. Send particulars of your case and ten cents in stamps for a large. Illustrated Treatise containing a any Wl oVtafn our knowledge of the patisfttto At* case by the application, to the practice <rf J ' medicine, of well-established principles of I science. The most ample resources for t lingering or chronic diseases, and the grsatMt skill, are thus placed within the easy resiefi ot & '• invalids, however distent they may reside. Write Vf.1'*.,-' • and describe your symptoms, inclosing tea cents V4 in stamps, and a complete treatise, on your par- i - ticular disease, will be sent you, with OUST opio* t Ion as to its nature and curabitttjr* ^ ~J-" V>' • Epileptic CouTalftlono, «r Vtta» i3?l; ralysi«. or Palsy, Locomotor A tula* ; St. Vltns'x Dance, Insomnia* or iaahility to sleep, u!'d threatened inssntty, NerVaaS' Debility, and e%ery -variety of nervous sfleo- wi-variety tion, nrO treated by our specialists for these die* • Sec numc , ,_..->t8 on ncr which will be sent lor ten cr­ eases with unusual success. Sec numerous esses reported in our different illustrated pamphlets on nervous diseases, any one of 1 which will be sent lor ten cents in postage stamps, when request for them is accompanied with a statement of a case for consulted tion, so that we may know which one of our Treatises to send. K * We have a Special Department, devoted ezrlveively to the treatment of Diseases of" " Women. Every case consulting our specialists, % whether by letter or in person, is given the | most caref ul and considerate attention. Im- ii-tjm portsnt cases tund wi- get few which have not already bafBed the skill of nil the home physicians* have the benefit 5 fji. U of a full Council of skilled speciciists. Kooms for Mdics in the , ^Invalids' Hotel and Surgical Institute are very private. Stud "'.-vfcS ten cents in stamps for our Complete Treatise on Diseases of , Women, illustrated with wood-cuts and colon d plates ilOO pages). DISEASES DF RUICU. DIME DF RUPTURE. HERNIA (Breacht, or RFPTt RE, no matter of bow long standing, or of what sixe% ISmBTME. I isi-'romptlyiind permanently cured by our speciulists, without the knife »u« without dependence apou trass--». Abundant references. Send ten cents for- our Illustrated Treatise. PILES, FISTIXJE, end ether diseases effecting the k)w«r bowels, are treated with tvoncieritil suc t-tss. The worst eases of* )ile tumors, are ptimcntntly cured in fifteen to twenty days* Send ten cents for Illustrated Treatise. Organic weakness, nenous debility, prematura decline of the manly powers, involuntary IQSSSSL irripisired memory, mental snsiety, aheeac* of will-power, tti ianeholy. weak tuck, and a)L sVm> tior.s arising from youthful inuiferetions and per- nicious. solitary practices, are speedily, thoroughly and permanently cured. We, mittiv years tgo. established a Special Department for tbe treatment of these diseases, under tbe management of some ot~ the most skillful physicians and surgeons on our Staff, in order- that nil wbo apply to us might receive till the advantage* of a full Council of the most experienced ejk clalista. We offer no apology for devoting so much attention to this neglected class of diai^ases, believing that no condition of humanity ia too wretched to merit the sysspatiiy sud best services of the noble profession to which we belong. Why sny medical --»L intent on doing good snd alleviating suffiring, should skua such cases, we cannot imagine. Why any one should f rnnhtwr WE OFFER NO APOLOSf YOUR BUGGY for ONE DOLLA Paint FrW*y. run It to Chorch Suad*?. The or It otherwise than m. st honorable to cure the worst cast* of these disease#, we cannot understand; and yet of all the other maladies which afflict mankind there is prefcaMy none «bowfc which physicians in general practice know an tittle. We atom therefore, continue, as heretofore, to treat with our best ctM»- sideration, sympathy, and skill, all applicant* who are suffering from any of these delicate diseases. Piiarn IT Most of these cases can be treated by us whea UUHUIII BOKa at a distance aa well as if here ia person. A Complete Treatise 036 pages) on theee delicate ^easaa sent seoierf. in plain etrceiope, srettrt from ohMrratten, on receipt of only ten cents, in stamps, for postage. All statements made and secrets confided to us wUl be beld to be MerscCy eoMtetW. AU letters of inquiry, or of consultation, should be addressed to VMLTS NSKKARV KK6AL ASSKIATML No. MS SKaia St̂ BI FFALO, R.T. . /. Tfce original »Bd antf reliable is CJOIT a CD'S ONK-OCXAT 1 white saa iomu at lean one year. Bght FuMoublcShade*. NoVtiauk iNtaaif, arias taN a M nsillt *Dta R||Mm «»«w<aa mm*--J- ^ . n,W i I .V.Vsi' ,:-v -.