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- ber-po«t an1'* *4 a that la should be «ftr"r«9Rt «* S^r- ^ Ml' the wind with w}n- tho shingles, plugg'd up' Rnow--' a jokin, and a lafiln', *tber with their brag^r, sassy, m. Only alittle hollow in Stumpy Fiel sepanied Darby and titt goat, (n morning while yet the grass was ben| of d»« r a bluebird ken be seen sroiln' ' ap *n sneaked my a month 1 tbe stubble, with dainty frill* I trigKinx, kid awav almas tbe rest fer fear o' snow; the J^ylrfrda ain't nocowerds, an' so keep on gwrk'and jest es sassy'* if «^rM only An* - robbings, so like humans, when yer posies atop a-blowiii', tho berries that they like all gobbled down-- e oufn louve ye lonesome, with tbe days: a shorter growin', ; An' tbe nun but faintly antilin' et ye through a frown, i , the Jaybird stays right by ye--ee dne kd sfapwK a likin'-- - / r it fer ye when the rest hes got ye cot- n«r*dan-a striking > ; -jf I cot fer the cflrtrtel' Mr't kmesaine day a buskin', tnmety git a shock throw'd down fairly ter "State birds cram a tearin' 'a if they'a Jest • ttrfeOSUn' Fer ter help mo out *n quick like from the hurry I am in. 4Us' they holler at each ottier--keep whoopito' an' a yelpin', •Sm' make uie chirk an' cheerful, Which it gopd a most as h«lpin'. 9*1 c'u'd write some wee. handy, like I've .e©ep them printers, " Air ttnke a tune as nice for them as Mrs. i Jeeny Und, ^Chey ih'u'4 !>oth be "bout the jaybird, a-loafln' thronph the winters, AB" mixin' up their yawpin' with snow an' '• freezin wind. IttVeasy 'noagh in summer, when the sky is blue and glowin', - >e •dugta'--but it's different when the seme Is black 'n saowin' MIKE'S PET PIG. Jk&Ml te Ike Death, and a Dinner That 8T *C "«• ftfc," tj ; <*- * h • •• . v {^; • ' BY JED. HOR. ̂ the bl^k^lttl btet tte hilL Mickey Finn was in the habit _ on errands for Tom, and so. Providence sent a litter of pigs Tom's sty, he picked out the small- 3, _ scrawniest, most measley looking ;in the litter and gave it to Mickey, course, the boy was delighted, and In nan home with the squealing little under his arm. Now, if there Wi «aything of which Mrs. Finn was Mil was fresh pork, especially when it was young and tender. But she had had «muriderable experience with animated Mlt in her day, and after looking at -Jfickey's acquisition with the eye of a "WuuMseur she decided that the chances <af the pig's ripening into plump hams •nd jnicy chops were very slim. The «ecmomic question having been disposed' •«£, Mrs. Finn evidently saw no value in tte pig from an ornamental or senti- ntal standpoint, for she said: "Now, Mickey, ye take that rack o' wid no mate on its back, t' Tom "Connor, an' tell him he might be up t' Iwtter lmsiness nor shovin' off his bones •toil bristles on ye. Faix he might as "Well be giyin' ye a sthove ghite. Luk ^ Hi' tail iv th' boneen! Musha, thare's mo more twist to it than there is in a Ihoe-haudle!" *Bnt, mother, I don't want th'pig V I ̂ ant t' play wid him!" •May wid a pig, is it! God save us! want to be playing wid Feen- Vi'toU, so ye will. Oh, but you're a ey b'v; ye're out iv ye're sivin small a. Play wid a pig! Och, did I iwar hear the likes! Play wid a pig! •Wihe ye'd be putt in' pants on him an' rim wid a spoon, agar. It's a 4 ye are, me b'y, wid ye're ould goats and that black, crow as has mkimj beads in his head. Well, well, wantin' t' make a ly'yer ivve, stead lir» dirtv snake charmer or mauthering as ye will be av ye don't stop jjwtf Animals! So, there. Now, ifidbw;take that pig back t' Tom Cbnnor teu him t' give ye wan wid pork on H* riha an' hite worth picklin' on him. 3wow-rnn, run awa'." ̂HHsey picked up $he pig tenderly in W arms and went away over the Hill. oHhrheart was heavy; but Tom Connor cheered him up. • "Mickey," said he, "you an' I will i a ptax for the porker forninst th' a* you can gather a little grass *thuff fer him. Mebbe hell get Then yer motherll be glad t' hav' «iii. Well call the porker Darby." ̂The pen was built, and Darby was "Wj installed therein.. Under the pare of the blacksmith and the porker-grew in size and and endeared himself to . ey by his many winning ways. pig beoame broad of back and •Jw® of limb. Darby's ears began to -oruop upon his neck, and he was very fcnd of being scratched between them "with a piece of old iron. And so the ^daya fled quickly by, filled with the joy "Ht content. TJJiere was no presage in ^beair of conung disaster; no kindly spirit to warn the boy and the %maupecting blacksmith of coming sor- 'tia better that tbe veil wmeb lades the future from inquiring eyee I aot be rent, And e'en tbe thunderbolt should fall yem unclouded sky, • approach with awful crash 'Of riven elements. T™ H. 'i Bat while the May days were slipping -y into the eternities Mrs. ~ - been idle. Her boy's Finn had owagant of Darby had awadlened her vapidity anew. Often while Mickey at school Mrs. Finn took sly trips r the meadows to the sty. On each • these occasions she took with her choice morsels which were calcu- . to increase Darby's girth, andt<> i his jowls droop with fatness. Alas, *«i0wever, Mrs. Finn entertained none of one sentiments of unselfish, love *** Darby which animated her son. She 2°®ijd«ee no poetry in the corkscrew *4QOn of Darby s tail as he grunted with while gnawing last year's cab- i stump. Her finer sensibilities had • r by the sandpaper of miili II I une. Each pound Darby gained fMPft not added grace and finely- iMMRaWd proportion to her, but rather Ifce salty pork barrel and the ^pto. •/> : i this time Mickey's old led Wllygoat was suffering the 'Of unrequited affection. Day 'kgr|day the hillv saw Mickey go by him •Jplfovay to the pimpen. But once iu h^ wfeeks did little Mike stop ilbol Wiw the goat as he had ittodpinjthe sweet old days te ooimng of the hated Darby. tpjbe aware that the in(«|vi| were waning fike tHaetwilight of an ptte.amd droop ing l>eneath diamonds of dew, the .. came out of his barrel and stretch his legs. He looked off over the v at the mists fleeing up the rui sides of Snake Hill. He saw the faint flush in the east gradually deepen into a vivid blush of rose color. He watched the flight of a flapping crow as it rose from a field of sprouting corn and perched on the top of the big pine in Lindsley's wood. Inspired by the mu­ sic of a blue bird that flew on the fence and sang him a morning roundelay, the billy became frisky and humped his back. Then he indulged in a little practice bucking. While engaged ib this harmless amusement the buly be­ came suddenly aware that he was a fr$e goat, no longer bound by the galling clothesline. The billy, having satisfied himself that he was no longer a captiv^, ambled over to Darby's pen. The pig was asleep. He, however, was soon awakened. There was a battering-ram at his gate. Onoe, twice, thrice did that implacable catapult hurl itself against the frail pen. Then the hem; lock groaned in splintering pain; it cracked, it broke. Darby sprang to his feet and squealed in fright. The hoofed demon with blazing eyes and ragged bangs full of hemlock 'splinters was in the pen. Now, what avails thy sleek and rounded balk, „ oh, porcine sybarite? BetW, far, if thou bat hadst the gaunt and hol­ low flank. The washboard ribs, thy leanness as of yore! Then began an awful struggle. Urged by the billy Darby was forced out into the field and bowled over and over down the hill. The billy attended strictly to business. No sooner did Darby get on his feet than he was called on in a most forcible manner to lie down. When Darby had once more got his trembling legs under him Be .made one supreme effort and ran up the hillside. His ascent was materially as­ sisted by the goat. But Darby was go­ ing toward the lime quarry! In head­ long, blundering flight Darby rushed •madly on. The brushes fringing the brink of the precipice were parted by the maddened rush of thirty-five pounds of animated pork. A faint squeal rent the air of the beautiful May morning, there was a dull and sickening thud on the rocks below, and Lifeless bat beautiful Darby lay,' '» IT. Before Mickey missed Darby ttfs t&ficle drove up to the door and invited him to make a short visit to Honckhockle. After her son had gone and the break­ fast dishes were cleared away Mrs. Finn went to the sty to have a look at the pig. There the awful reality dawned upon her--the wrecked sty, the freed goat, and the missing pig. But when sift' found Darby in the quarry she made no moan. In fact, she smiled and bore th*' body home in her strong arms. The next morning Darby was tried by the fire and was not found wanting, for his jacket assumed a rich "brown color, and the savory smell that rose from the oven was sufficiently appetizing to make the tongue of a gourmet palpitate in his mouth. Then Darby was put on a big plate and placed in the oven. There were a number of guests at dinner that day, among whom were Mrs. Murphy, 'Mrs Cronin, Mike Welsh's wife, Patsey Corrigan's lass Nancy, and the one- legged accordion player "as tends tV railroad switch an' waves th' rid flag when there's a cow on the track." Just as the guests sat down at the ta­ ble Mickey returned, but his mother gave him a plate in the kitchen for cer­ tain prudential reasons. Darby was indeed a beautiful sight, ornamented with sprigs of celery and with a brand new corncob in his mouth. If he was lovely in life, he certainly pre­ sented a very toothsome appearance in death. Mickey drummed impatiently upon the kitchen table with his knife- handle, because, being the younger, he had to wait until the rest were served. But at last a big piece of tenderloin was placed before Mm. To his shame, be it said, he actually neglected the potatoes on his plate, and asked for a second piece of Darby before he touched the potatoes. It was with deep regret that the oc­ currence is recorded, but Mickey's plate wag filled a third time and in this in­ stance it was a choice cut from the plump ham of his little protege. After he had been filled to repletion, after the buttons of his vest had been relieved of dangerous pressure, he leaned back in his chair with grease on his face and a-peace-with-all-the-world look in his eyes. Then his mother turned to him and said. "Mickey, did ye like th' dinner?" "Yis, mother. "Won't ye hav'another little bit aff th'neck--jist a trifle, dear?" "No, mother dear; I couldn't ate it; I'm full." Well, darlint, ye won't be freckened if I tell ye somethin' ?" "No, mother, I will,, not." "Well that pieeero' rib* ab* that bit aff th' ham, an' that piece o' th' neck, yer'e afther 'aitin' kem off your Darby !" If a bombshell had fallen at Mickey's feet he could not have been more startled. He leaned forward in his chair, and big tears ran down his cheeks and mingled with the gravy on his plate. Then he laid his head down upon the table and wept as if his heart would break But his father went to the closet and brought out a new bow and arrow which he laid before his son. Half an hour later there was a shout of laughter in the back yard. When Mr. Finn went to the back door he saw little Mike trying to penetrate the hide of the billy goat with an arrow. Wwia. on tlM Car* «T &&NMM ft. Dodge te bar "A Bundle <4 Letters to Bttf Otrls."] One of tbe greatest difficulties of'the modern flats or furnished rooms is lack of Rpaoe to put the numerous thi)og8 that must accumulate. Once start out with confusion, fcn$l it will seem him ever to create order. It is absolutely necessary to keep things in order, and to do so some things must be invented. Bags will be found useful. Have two or three for soiled clothes. Another of different size and color can hold pieces of dress goods, etc. Snialldr bags hol<3 the small bits, only too often thrown away. These bags should be hung on heavy nails behind the door. A soap-box neatly covered with daijk muslin or paper and put in a corner, 4r even under the bed, will hold spate shoes and rubbers of different members of the family, which look so badly lying around. If dresses have to hang in the room, be sure and have a curtain of muslin or calico to hang before them, both for looks and to keep them from the dust. Bureau drawers have a great faculty of never being in order. How often have we gone through one in a hurry, and have turned the whole contents up­ side down before we have found what we wanted; then have rushed off, say­ ing, "Oh, I will fix it later!" When does later come? I have myself done „ this too often, and I imagine you have too. Now I try to check myself, and stop a moment to put things back one by one, as I search through them, and find it much less trouble. Here are three good suggestions to learn and remember: A place for everything, even odds and end: Put away everything as we use it. "Could I find it again in the dark?" This last seems funny, but do you know why we have to rummage so often? It is be­ cause We forget where we put things. If we keep in mind looking for a thing in the dark, and try to think of where things go, we could say, with a young girl I know of, "I think I could find everything of mine, even if I suddenly became blind." Onr bedrooms are the places where we spend those valuable hours of rest which are needed to fit us for work. It is sometimes difficult to make these airy in modern houses, so they must be kept as free as possible from impur­ ities. Never leave in them flowers, fruit, or other vegetable matter at night. Try and keep thejn clean and free from dust. Do not le( laziness keep you from carrying out the slops as soon as possible. Let the bed air at least an hour, and even in winter do not be afraid to open windows in the room, or in the living room and let the air through. In February and March the beds should have thorough cleans­ ing with salted soapsuds, and after­ ward must be powdered. Washing is a hard task where water has to be carried; but all our work is hard. Let us remember that labor saved now often results in double the work later on, so try and wash fre­ quently and not let soiled clothes ac­ cumulate. The kitchen is an important element in every home. The fire needs atten­ tion first, and we can give it only a word, and that is, use brains and care over it. Have ready the wood, the paper, and coal the night before. Think of it often, and, above all else, don't use kerosene for lighting it because you are in a hurry, and don't more coal than you need. Refrigerators want thorough washing at least once a week with borax and water, and need to be well dried. The blanket used on the ice should be dried frequently, and washed occasionally. A little charcoal standing in a saucer amid the food purifies it. Tainted food is most harmful. Do be careful, there­ fore, of the refrigerator. No refuse matter must stop the drain­ pipe in the sink. Too much care can­ not be taken here. Fresh water must often be allowed to run down, and at intervals it is wise to throw in some disinfectant. Chlorate of lime dissolved in hot water is not very costly, and it will keep the pipe healthy. If one has to leave dirt in the room after sweeping, leave it in the middle of the floor, for the people will know that it is there for a purpose and not out of care­ lessness. Dust under sofas, chain, or in corners suggests poor house-clean- mW, if possible, with system., plan­ ning out duties as far as possible with method, and try and have regular days for regular duties. Don't hurry; take things as they come from day to day, and try not to look ahead. Put heart into even dishwashing, and see if it does not come easier. Sing about your work; it will lighten it. Do always the best you can, and then leave thereat; but be sure the best is first done. Z pour on ttader Disadvantages. Reporter (interviewing candidate, lor the Presidency)--Excuse me, sir, but I have unquestionably made some mis­ take. You say that your parents were wealthy and gave you an academic education. Candidate--Yes; that is correct. Reporter--That you never went bare­ foot? Candidate--Not to my recollection. Reporter--And never" served your country in the capacity of canal-driver?. Candidate--No. Reporter (drawing a long brefcth)--You have my best wishes for your success, sir; but you are laboring under a disad­ vantage. The public is fastidious on these points. I bid you good morning. --Judge. MAN'S free will is free will up to i certain point only; he may choose what he will think, say, or do, but he cannot choose what the consequences of thymr things shall be; they are fixed by alaw at once immutable and gracious. COURTSHIP consists in th« number cp! • •••ViY"-----i- quiet attentions, not so pointed as to *ew»e«p«nt would nave done, alarm, not so vague as not to be undei -*-"y waited, evidently knowin£!sĵ --iSteiriie,. 4"** ' lk*fciahwe lack attracts us; no the light like the blind man. •dores the drum-major. The js has his eyes fixed on Why ? In order to watch the bird in its flight. If one is not on one's guard, lowered fortunes may lead to baseness of soul. , like Hill and Stephens Quarrel* I was discoursing with an old Geor­ gian, a; school-mate whom I had not seen for forty years, and I let him do most all the talking and could read his emotions as he. spoke of his old home, and of Ben Hill, and the Farrels, and Judge Bull, and Bingham, and Bacon, and Ridley. He said he was in the court-house at La Orange and Ben Hill was sitting near him, when Thomas W. Thomas came in and handed Mr. Hill a letter. That letter contained a chal­ lenge from Alex. Stephens to fight a duel. Mr. Hill read it, but did not ex­ hibit the slightest embarrassment or ex­ citement. He was engaged in the case at bar, and, putting the letter in his pocket, attended to the case and made an admirable argument and gained the case. Then he took my friend by the arm and asked him to go with him to nis office. There he showed him the challenge and remarked: "Of course I will not--I cannot fight Mr. Stephens. My whole nature is shocked at it. It is a horrible barbarity and proves nothing. I will decline and publish my reasons." The next morning he showed his reply to my friend. It was copied and ap­ proved by him and some other personal friends; both Whigs and Democrats in­ dorsed it heartily. That withering reply --that unanswerable rebuke is still fresh in the memories of Georgians, and did more to abolish the code of honor than had been done in half a century. Mr. Stephens published Mr. Hill as a cow­ ard, but it amounted to nothing. Mr. Hill continued to advance in popularity and lost nothing in friends or renown. Mr. Stephens had in a public speech spoken of the Know-Nothing party leaders astraitors to their country, and Mr. Hill replied by saying that the parallel was on the other side; that the Whig party had for many years showered its honors and its favors upon Mr. Stephens, and now he had turned from it and betrayed it like Judas Iscariot did his Lord and Master, and the only difference was that Judas repented and hanged himself; but he was sorry to say that Mr. Stephens was still unre­ pentant and unhanged. For this lan­ guage Mr. Stephens challenged him.-- Bill Arp, in Atlanta Constitution. o, Gems from Les Miserables. Labor is the law; he who rejects it will find ennui his torment. What precipices are idleness and pleasure! Do you know that to do nothing is a melancholy resolution; to live in idleness on the property of so­ ciety ; to be useless, that is to say, per­ nicious! This leads straight to the depth of wretchedness. Woe to the man who desires to be praised! He will become vermin. Man is not a circle with a single center; he is an ellipse with a double focus. Facts from one of these, and ideas the other. To read is to assurtf one's self of what one is reading. There are people who read very loud, and who have the ap­ pearance of giving themselves their word of honor as to what they are perusing. To what party did he belong? To the party of humanity. Nothing is small, in fact; any one who is subject to the profound and penetrat­ ing influence of nature knows this. All birds that fly haye round their leg the thread of infinite. The soul of a young girl, should not be left in the dark; later on, images that are too abrupt, and too lively are formed there, as in a dark chamber. She should be gently and discreetly enlightened, rather with the reflection of realities than with their harsh and direct light. A useful and graciously austere half light which dissipates puerile fears and There ii •I *,v>W • .1,' " -V , y obviates fall. There is nothing but the maternal instinct, that admirable in­ tuition composed of the memories of the virgin and the experience of the woman, which knows how this half light is to be created and of what it should consist. The soul aids the body, and at certain moments raises it. It is the only bird which bears up its own cage. Poverty in youth, when it succeeds, has this magnificent property about it, that it turns the whole will towardi ef- the whole soul toward a^n- ' Fnnay Things in a Zoo. 'Funny, isn't it," said the keeper, the "Zoo," "how different kinds of ani­ mals and birds will become attached to each other when caged up or confined jn adjoining compartments. Now, there's that ring-tailed monkey, for instance. He has been making lovo to the booby owl. The latter sits blinking in the next cage, and the poll parrot and the tom-cat in that cage over there are as intimate as two burglars planning to crack a safe. 'The funniest thing in the whole lot,-- however, is the way that snake in the cage over here crawls through the wire and twists itself around the white monkey's tail. Talk about a monkey and parrot time, the antics of that monkey and sfif&ke lay all over anything in that line. 'They play the very devil sometimes, too. The other day while performing one of their double-trapeze acts the snake must have bitten the monkey, for the latter got mad and swung himself around with the rapidity of a roulette ball and dashed through into the next cage. He kept whirling the snake about, knoeked down three doves in the pigeon loft, broke tho glass out of the east window, burst through the wire netting, and started on a dead run for Woodberry. Before they got to thfe edge of the woods the monkey darted up a tree. The monke.r is up the tree yet, but he is minus his tail. The snake didn't want to follow the animal up the tree,and twisted itself around the base of the tree, while the monkey made a desperate plunge and parted with his caudal appendage. "The snake then crawled back to the Zoo' and entered its cage, and hung the monkey's, tail up on the imitation tree stump and went to sleep." After the keeper got through with his story--to the truthfulness of which he said he was willing to swear--b i said he felt thirsty, and he started o<3 toward the spring to get a drink of water.--Baltimore Herald. Education of German Wome*. The culinary art forms part of the education of women in Germany. Th« well-to-do tradesman, like the mechanic^ takes a pride in seeing his daughters good housekeepers. To effect this ob­ ject the girl, on leaving school, whici> she does at about fourteen years of age, goes through the ceremony of confirma­ tion, and is then placed by her parent* with a country clergyman, or in a large family, where she remains one or two years, filling what may almost be termed the post of servant, and doing the work of one. This is looked upon as the a)>- prenticeship to domestic economy. She differs from a servant, however, in this: that she receives no wages; on the con­ trary, her parents often pay for the case taken of her as well as for her clothing. This is the first step in l^er education of housekeeper. She next passes, oa the same conditions, into the kitchen of a rich private family or that of some hotel of good repute. Here she has the control of the expenditure, and of tbe servants employed in it, and assists per­ sonally in the cooking, but is always addressed as fraulein, or miss, and Is treated by the family with deference and consideration. Many daughters of rich families receive a similar training, with this difference, however, that they receive it in a princely mansion or a royal residence. Consequently, the women of Germany are perfect models of order and economy. The richest woman as well as the poorest is well acquainted with the market price of provisions ^and it gives one real satisfao* tion to see her bustling about from one part of the house to another; now peep ing into the nursery to see how the children are going on, then looking into the kitchen to see that the cook is do- .life ',,' lL:. body, and keeping all well up to their work. In short she is the very soul of the house. , WHEN trains are telescoped the pa»> sengers are able to see stars--usually a conjunction of Mars Mid my nerve, aht /WnxiAit O'Bbikh, the Irish leader, fltys that "journalists are the watchdogs of civilization." •• y I ,#f > ' r, „ thefamale . by ti»e dcMAhaker to bi fti«K ii| derthe arm-pits; and a bostle, such a style of feminine costume vailed, would have been, not a improver, but a hump. Short ; possessed, also, one\9ubstantial Idratk tage--they put an end for a time, to tight lacing, and sixty years ago a Jmir of stays was the most innocent' of bodices. The highest authorities on cos­ tume seem to have inclined to the opinion that the bustle, which undeni­ ably canie from Paris, was a reaction among the ladies of the French aristoc­ racy against the pseudo-classic robes of the revolution and the empire. The ladies of the courts or Josephine and Maria Louise dressed much more decently than the marveileuses of the directoire had done, still, David and the artists of his school were the real arbi­ ters of fashion until 1815; nor could shor*. waists and dresses clinging to the limbs be entirely eradicated from the female fashionable wardrobe until the restoration was waning. The'battle was fought and the victory won a year or two before the deposition of Charles X., and as regards the gar­ ments of the fair sex, the change almost amounted to a metamorphosis; the waist descending from its bad altitude between the shoulders to its natural posi­ tion at the hips; sleeves hitherto tight were suddenly puffed out to pretentious amplitude and the pear-shaped, baloon- sbaped, or leg-of-mutton sleeve was in process of time succeeded by a wider and looser sleeve, which English dress­ makers dubbed "the bishop." Unfortunately long waists effected the revival of the mischievious practice of tight-lacing, and stays became real instruments of torture. The .dress im­ prover ran its course, and declined as suddenly as it had appeared. The "princess" robe banished bustles for four or five years, but the bustle cahie back' with short walking skirts, and it thrives, and it will thrive, and toll die again, we suppose, no woman can tell how, notwithstanding all flouts and jeers of the satirists, and the solemn head-shaking and grave reprehensions of the moralists. The only practical way to suppress a fashion is to associate it with infamy. Mrs. Turner, the poisoner in James I.'s time was hanged at Tyburn in a yellow ruff stiffened with yellow starch and yellow immediately went out of fashion. The murderess, Maria Manning, was hanged at Horsemonger lane in a black satin dress, and for twenty years after­ wards black satin was out of fashion* As it happens, executions now take place in private, and nothing would be gained in the way of fashion reform by hanging a female criminal whose garb comprised a huge dress improver. - --Ar~ gonaut. i Woman and Her Brain. The average weight of the female brain has never yet been determined. One of the best-known tables of the weights of the brains of the two sexes is that quoted by Prof. Huxley in his "Man's Place in Nature," where the results seem adverse to women. Allowance must, however, be made for the follow­ ing considerations: In the cases of men a larger number of brains were weighed, among which were included the brains of many celebrated men, especially col­ lected for this object. The women's brains are much fewer in number, taken from the lowest sources, and did not in-* elude the brain of any woman of dis-t tinction. A comparison of such mate­ rial is obviously unfair. Yet among the female brains the heaviest brains known to science up to that time was discov­ ered. It weighed several grammes more than the brain of Cuvier. Since that time, however, though great pains have been taken to ascertain the brain weight of celebrated men, not one record exists of the brain weight of famous women. The brain of George Eliot was especially remarkable, and it is stated in her life that a cast! of her head showed the largest development from brow to ear of any person's recorded, except that of the great Napoleon. Hunting in Xoroeeo. In one of the beats a hunter named Shebaa, a veteran past 70, had just shot a boar, when the dogs came in full cry after another, and he had just time to pour in the powder carried loose in his leather pouch, and to put the long iron ramrod down the barrel, when an­ other tusker came to the front. Shebaa fired and sent the ramrod like a skewer through the body of the boar, who changed back and knocked him over. Shebaa fell flat on his face, neither moving arm nor leg, while the boar stood over him cutting into ribbons his hooded "jelab" of wool. He shouted for help, exclaiming: "Fire! fire!" I ran up to within a few feet. "I fear to hit you," I said. "Fire!" he cried. "I would rather be shot than be killed by a 'halof.'" I stooped low, and raising the muzzle of my gun shot the boar through the heart. The huge carcass fell upon Shebaa who, when released from the weight, got up and shook me by the hand heartily, saying: "Praise be to God the merciful, and thanks to you, I have escaped death." I with­ drew the ramrod, which had passed right through the body of the animal.-- An Ancient Ship Railway. Long before the days of Eads, or even of steam and railroads, the feasibility of the land transport of vessels was demon­ strated by a Venetian engineer named Sorbblo. In 1439, as lately stated to the Philadelphia Engineers' Club, by Mr. E. L. Corthell, a fleet of some thirty armed and provisioned vessels was taken overland from the Adige to Lake Garda, to relieved the besieged city of Brescia. The vessels were placed on cradles and pulled from the water, 600 oxen being required to bring the largest to level ground. The fleet was drawn in an imposing procession across the plain for thirty miles, then lifted up Mount Pineda and lowered Oh the other side by windlasses, and finally hauled twelve miles farther to the lake. One vessel was destroyed, but the others, as well as a second fleet a year later, made the passage in safety. The larg­ est of the vessels were nearly 150 feet long, and forty feet wide.--Arkansaw Traveler. Deafaess a Pleasure. "I am told, sir, that you are quite hard of hearing." "Your information was oorrect, but what about it?" "I can cure deafness in a month, and if I can't cure you I will charge noth­ ing." "Why, I wouldn't be cured for a thou­ sand dollars." "You wouldn't? Why not!" "My daughter plays the piaa»r*-- Lincoln Journal. * IN Vermont it is A misdeme They come like a as they oome, Queen. In their and the laws of are of no more account thMi tiwss of order and prearranged harmonies. When they come into a rooni it fa a* if they brought with' them a train of •tMm and straws and a cloud of dust, like the disjecta membra on the outside of a whirlpool. They upset chairs and knock down ornaments; they put their hats on the flowers in the vase, and they fling their sticks and umbrellas among the Venetian glass. They stumble over the head of the tiger-skin on the floor, carrom against rickety tables, miatalrc the mask of the looking-glass for a prac­ ticable door, set their tea-cups on the best-lx>und books, crumble their but­ tered cake on the Persian carpet, call Mrs. Brown, whom you wish to propiti­ ate Mi's. Smith, of whom .she is the mortal enemy; contradict your favorite philosopher, who is accustomed to a re­ spectful audience in your house; and throw scalding water over your friend, the poet's last production, with his wife sitting in wrath and amazement, grimly listening to this blasphemous stream pouring headlong from those uncontrollable lips. When they greet you it is unlike the greeting of anyone else. They disdain the conventional formula and asks how you are-in other words than those for the most part used. Sometimes they do not ask at all, but dash into the room with their breezy ways and dust-laden atmosphere and break out with a bit of news they think will interest you to hear. "I've come to tell you of my din­ ner at Mrs. So-and-So's," they say in a voice whjch would make itself heard through the fog as clearly as the horn or the steam whistle. "Have you heard that story of Lady Deb? Such a good story; you must hear it." This is per­ haps another prefatial address, the rest of your friends looking on in amusement, wondering what can be the terms of your acquaintance with this free and easy person whom they do not know, but who seems to know you so remark­ ably well. Then, if they are women, they are sure to dress themselves in a manner to make you wince in private and to attract all eyes in public. They do something queer with their heads; wear their hats in an unauthorized fashion; put or* startling colors; tie huge silk handker­ chiefs as big and polychromatic as Jo­ seph's coat; wear gowns that trail a yard in the dust, or that are so short one speculates on the color of their "clocks" ; or in some way manage to make them­ selves the object of every one's amazed attention. Then they have fulfilled the reason of their being, and are happy in proportion. liuieral expenses U eould be collected. that a woman andamxmae. Not Pets for the Parlor. It was my good fortune to see more of tame tigers in India than falls to the lot of most persons, savs a writer in Cas- selVs Magazine. There are many men who have shot tigers, but my opportu­ nities for taking care of them and ob­ serving them in a state of captivity were almost exceptional. My friend, the rajah of Burdwan, had a good menag­ erie in the gardens of one of his sum­ mer palaces and we used frequently to meet there and go around and inspect the animals. The rajah had little diffi­ culty in procuring tigers, leopards, and bears, which are to be found in many parts of his extensive estates. But the best of his tigers were two which had been procured from the province of Oude. One of these was called Vizeer and the other had received the name of Bheem, because the natives said he was Hindoo and would hot eat beef. So Bheem lived chiefly on goats' flesh, while Vizeer had no scruples as to what he would not eat. The real difference between them was this: Vizeer was caught when be was full grown and had for a long time been obliged to hunt for and kill whatever he wanted to eat. Bheem was captured when very young, and had been brought up by hand on a milk and rice diet, which had been changed to cooked goat's flesh when he grew up. Bheem had never tasted blood or taken life. He was accustomed to be petted and patted by the keepers,. and was, in fact, a beautiful big cat. Vizeer was a very different character. He was a very large and handsome ani­ mal. * It was the custom to give him oc­ casionally a pig or a goat to kill, as it is almost essential to the health of a tiger, which has fed on wild animals of his own killing, that he should sometimes taste fresh blood, and eat some of the flesh with the hair on it. Vizeer used to be shut up in the inner compartment of his den, whilst the pig was let down through a grating in the roof into the outer compartment. Before tbe pig had time to understand the situation the door of the inner den opened and Vizeer sprang out. With his forepaws he seized the pig, and the next moment the hugh jaws closed over its neck, so that death was instantaneous. Vizeer never relaxed his hold until he had drained the blood from his victim's body. He would sometimes at once proceed to eat a hind leg, carving the ham with his sharp teeth and bristly tongue as neatly as a cook could have cut it with a knife. Vizeer would then compose himself to sleep, and in the course of the following night he would gradually consume the rest of the carcass, after which he would not care to be fed again for two or three days. • "f Diamonds Guarded Ingenlousljy- > When the French Crown jewels were sold by auction last season it is well known that the finest and most his­ torical of the gems, including the fa­ mous "Regent" diamond, were reserved, and these may now be seen iu the Louvre in the gallery called after the well-known statue of Apollo, which is such a prominent object in it. "Before these priceless gems were exi>osed, however, a committee of skilled officials and experts are appointed in order to decide on some plan of render­ ing their loss by theft virtually impossi­ ble. And this is what the committee decided upon. The jewels are exhibited in a showcase, the glass plates of which are exceptionally thick and the iron frame-work of which is abnormally strong, and an attendant has been ap­ pointed to specially keep watch over the precious exhibit all day long. Should he have the slightest cause to suspect any visitor or visitors he has only to touch a button eusily within his reach, whereupon the glass case promptly disappears from view and sinks into a specially-constructed shaft, over the top of which the same auto­ matic machinery causes thick covers, formed of thick metal plates, to close with a sharp snap. The ingenuity dis­ played in carrying out this plan is re­ markable, and the fact that the clock­ work apparatus has cost close upon £800 will convey some idea of its complicated character.--London Figaro. IT Slight red! the toll of the ' --WmMmgUm T«B* are tfc will jump at--a --Burlington Jrrte rrens. WotTJJ) it be-.proper to speak of* theatrical prompter as .̂vehicle beoanse he is a stage-coach ?--fonkers States­ man. DOCTOR--Did you take the rhubarb I ordered? Patient--Yes, sir. Doctor --How did you take it? Patient--In » pie.--Detroit Free Prese. WE don't see why strawberries are not strong enough to keep their own prices at a high figure. They have plenty of sand in them--Boston Post. "FLY the pleasure that bites to-mor­ row," observes a philosopher who prob­ ably reeled off this piece of wisdom after a day's ill luck at fishing.--Phila­ delphia Ledger. "WOULD you like a June idyl?" writes a poet. We would, indeed, if w« .c°tild afford it, but we shall be obliged to postpone our vacation iriiffl August.-- New York News. THE proposed form of capital punish­ ment for American murderers is death by electricity. In New York City it is not necessary to commit a murder to be experimented on.--Texas Siftings. A LEADING man among the Chinese of New York, now defunct, used to say tliat he could tell all his countrymen here by their pig-tails. He can't now-- dead men tell no tails.--Texas Sif tings. BBOWN---Have you got a quarter about you, Robinson? Robinson--Certainly. Brown--Thanks! I'm just back from the races, and I want to get a drink and have my boots shined.--New York Bun. » ^ CLARk (whispering)^-Tm so sorry we moved. You can't stay s6 late as you did when we lived in the other house. George--Why, my darling, what differ­ ence does it make? "These stairs squeak."--Omaha World. "I AM so glad to meet you, Mr. Gray- beard; my friend tells me you are the oldest Mason in America." O, dear, no, that is my son, George Washington Gray beard, my youngest son. .lam the boy preacher. --Burdetie. PHASyEsius (at greenhouse) -- What are you going to do with the cutting Dingolbv ? Dingolby--Take it home to Mrs. Dingolby, my boy. Phassesius-- Ah, I see. You intend to give your ~ 2? wife the slip, as it were.--Detroit Free Press, «_ WIFE--How great, how overwhelm­ ing, how beyond all compare, how ex­ ceeding all the wildest fancy paints, the most extravagant imagination con­ ceives. Husband >-- What, my dear? The falls or the hotel bill?--Washing­ ton Critic. WHEN they talked about the nine in Athens it was the nine Muses; to-day, all over the country, the nine refers to base-ball, excepting through the Middle and Western States, where it is under­ stood to mean quinine.--San Francisco Examiner. MRS. MARYWELL--Ah, Jennie, I un­ derstand you are going to marry a second-hand husband. Miss Jennie (who has chosen a widower)--Yes, but I am a ready maid, you know, and the combination won't be so bad.--Wash­ ington Critic. COUNTRY MINISTER--I am sorry, Mr. Wrangle, but as I was driving from the parsonage biefore service I saw your little boy on Gooseback bridge snaring for suckers. Mr. Wrangle--Is that so, parson? Did ye notice what luck he was havin'?--The Epoch. IT is not always easy to tell whether or not a woman really iheans what she says; but this rule does not apply when she is expatiating on the accomplish­ ments of her baby. She may be mis­ guided, but she is always perfectly sincere.--Somerville Journal. OMAHA IGNORAMUS--Well, well! So the daughter of my old friend has been on the stage for years under an assumed name. Is she a great actress? .New Yorker--A great actress! Gee whit- taker ! Didn't I just tell you she'd been married nine times--Omaha World. WIFE--I see by the paper that a Russian troupe that plays on twenty- four pianos at once is on its way to America. Dear me! I wonder if they were not .driven out. Husband--Like enough. . This country is a refuge for the oppressed of all nations.--Omaha World. BOBBY (whose uncle has given him a dollar)--I wish you would give me a nickel, Uncle James, instead of a dollar. Uncle James (astonished)--But, Bobby, a dollar is better than a nickel. Bobby --That's the trouble; if it's a dollar, pa'll want it; if it's only a nickel, I can have it.--The Epoch. UNDERTAKER (to physician)--Did a stranger call on you to-day for treat­ ment, doctor? Physician -- No. Un­ dertaker--That's strange. The gentle­ man was looking for a physician and I recommended you very highly. Phy­ sician--Yes, I guess that's the reason he didn't come to see me.--New York Sim. , i i? . u A Matrimonial Argument. In an address to young men, t)r. W. Pratt, of London, says that married life is by far the most healthful. In 1,000 married men of twenty-five or thirty years of age there are six deaths; 1,000 bachelors furnish ten deaths, and 1,000 widowers twenty-two deaths. In young men married before twenty years the figures are unfavorable, being fifty her 1,000. In unmarried men under twenty the rate is but seven per 1,000. If girls marry before twenty a like mor­ tality befalls them. Married people from eighteen to twenty die as fast as people from sixty to seventy. After twenty-one marriage should be con­ tracted as soon as possible. Interrupted Labors. Office Boy (to editor)--A gentleman outside, sir, says he Editor (angrily)--Didn't I tell you, James, that I am writing an editorial on the tariff and must not be disturbed ? I can't see anybody. Office Boy (sure of himself)--Says he wants you to meet him at the Eagle sa­ loon around the corner. Hell be there in five minutes. Editor--Oh! Tell him if I get there before he does 1711 wait for him--Texas Siftings. a ^ The Premium Humorist. " Who do you think is the American humorist?" "Well, I think you are about as good as any of them." "Thanks. For a fact, I believe I have quite a talent in that direction." "No doubt of it." "When did you first regard sne «<t A humorist?" , "When you made your seventh prom* ise to pay me what you owe me."--Lin­ coln Journal. 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