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^ IT**™*m ^ ̂ %>f^JT; Mi K y "> • run WISKST roob1 am mwa wvwt cAasa* .|*l^*. i^obie, ha, --d'fa4<L <2M wltwit thing they oovl4r* Started forth with hast* Wf „ This HTPJOIIJJ day f' ~„ i os earth I'll glw4ii^.;%tei*t, «t Jon I'll taste f ' X'V to VHNt thing' I taMMKi. %"" '• ..'•, could I do below?" . I - f" , , . _ orfailU "Indeed^ • ' yonrself the fotfl rm clafm t«M) * ttWWKIt bin' kiwi sell, and see can sava against; Siv threat ne«t 's reward to him who #o®» the M«t-* wlaer than the rest." /**"'/ •aid: "Most at tttUn i i\ i. and I am surely jdot tbk least; J," il west and east, * • -.- :% , Mltioe b<»th ,#tt* my tMgto are ever better far than one, ": ®4 ' •rcaa I <to b0fope another sira^ X : *Tba world ta rife with woa, ; % / „ and Borrow. I willfO /, , all the highways to a&d * < * the broken hearts, and wotB> .MM •Mfe. .«*aj«r Hie strange <Mwass < ter lot on me eonUT fell Elave to all? U «?2K MM oat: "This starting out to «| SRW wise they are, it seems to ^is .*oie them but fools the more. . IB to nay W and uxm, 3C1 take the day to iwit. i! 1 on the morrow, with a fresher sest,^ *:•+ I Kinase the manter, he Will say: ££*35 J You Kf» the wisest yesterday*!*"* last tool started, halted, tomad 4*4® round, , bowing to th« ground, k his old place again beside the Kiag, Baying, "Oh. masterS What the wisest tiring May to--X cannot tall. Asa ao I'll do the thing that '9 next my hand. fool: And that Via hero to do. l i t wel l?" .• ^Lam a fool--uoy toaster. lou uaoar<t>niV--?: HUGH M'lLVAIN'S CRIME. ax CUBK Huutem, »fv>, • b>t "D'ye mind Mcllvain, Terence?" re- fRarked Jimmy Barns. "He little likes •43ie goings on the night!" ? Twos Twelfth Day Eve, the 5th of 3s"«irT, and all the Imiius who worked. «pon the farms in the vicinity "were lifesembled together to celebrate the occasion in old-time style. Hugh Mcllvain, "the master," as iimmj and the other old country em- jjjoyes were want to call him, was the largest land-owner in the country,located Jlftss than fifty miles from Chicago. On one of his corn fields twelve bright fires blazed forth in due observ­ ance of the hour. And while the farmer boys and girls •i Were dancing about one, the largest flice, "the master" looked on without : amy indication of pleasure expressed in kis handsome face. The scene put him in anything but a • contented frame of mind. Before many •ttinutes what little curiosity he had to witness the proceedings was overpow­ ered by bitter recollections, and Hugh Mcllvain, like many another reckless man, sought refdge from unpleasant /thoughts in drink. "The masters all broke up about something," said Terence, when he saw Slim going toward the village tavern. *1 wonder if it's in love he is." >&.M Mit's little love he ever feels for any­ thing but money," spoke up Jimmy; **but, howsomever, we'll find it out to­ morrow night at the maakin'. He'll liave to join in that for everybody will be there." "True fof*'yon, Jimmy!" broke in a /rosy-cheeked girl standing near, "and .U^Btween the three of us. I'd say the lass he loves just came to-night." ..'"Whois it, Emmy?" demanded both < ^ a breath. _.. "Never mind npw. Don't be anxious. "Watch at the maskin'to-morrow night," C, Wlucily responded Emmy Grayson, with *'"ijitoss of her yellow ringlets. J And she left them to join in the wil<$- v s ttt sort of merrymaking, while the firefe " t continued to burn. \ ^ ; The next night-- twelfth night--camd ' ibd the scene of revelry was transferred , to the big house, which stood back from Hie highway, with sloping lawn in front. Bright lights gleamed from every win­ dow. Lanterns hung picturesquely from outside. One row was placed •long the edge of the veranda roof, and a festooned line overhung the broad eu- /-itrance. ' s As Jimmy Burns had declared, every­ body was present; and such costumes they had! Most of these were im­ provised for the occasion, yet here and there a hired suit indicated its * v wearer to be an invited guest from the , Adjacent city or a more fastidious ^iiflweller in the country. - The music was good; thevcollation re- :> tearkably delicate, and ail ment merry ;" X' f *£ & marriage bell. . . Twas nearly 11 o'clock. : t u !f •«f ' The highest pitch of exciting pleas- ttre had already been reached. , As was predicted, Hugh McHvain was ftere. He had to be, for this was. his itouse. His house! • *" All! that was the burden of his last f|»|*ight'8 thoughts which had 00 troubled ®im in the wheat field by the twelve ^ • • bright fires. • , His house! How was it his? And while he, looking over the gay 1 . throng, from where he stood in a door- 16' *'way meditating, a little, shrinking fig- re came out of the opposite room. ShQ was a city guest. That was eviT >nt from her costume. She was eased as "Yum-l'iim," and with hei4 .paneso jEan she screened her face a$ .WP'^a-ched Hugh Mcllvain a&c| Md him lightly on the arm. ; > was dressed as a cavalier, bu| no mask, for he acted as host oil occasion. - ^av^ier-'" the sweet voic^ "«ranaea, "a wandering gypsy has jusi yteft an important message, and I am re­ quested to send you into yonder room. '4 stai-ted involuntarily. His I'dpreetched thoughts had played havoc his nerves, but instantly he recov- ^red hiimelf." •; I "will go at once," he answered, and Yum-Yum was left alone in the . »y- 8# had to stand near the light to ret^l ' important message. It was brief, ' ran tb.xnt: . • •^HfCAoo, Jhme 2. if 1- -• "JHugh Mcllvain, Bw|: |-i* "8xn--Tbe_ gypsy bearer has been Jn- f W»ck, Hugh was on ttie road, SpewUoe jl the direction of the village. The master's mad !"csclaimed Jimnw, the tirst to get breath after his astonish­ ment. ' ' Not mad, my friend, but sensible," remarked a third man, who came up just then. "Come in boys, and we'll soon learn what the matter is." " We wur lookin' for yez and yer com­ rades, Sor," spoke up Terence. "It's spilin' the fun, yez are, lavin' 90 sud- djntly when t&e f)u*e managers bad yez all flxed." The fawn Imnds and their "oousins" had been enjoying themselves on the spacious barn floor, and had suddenly missed the presence of five or six "city fellers" who were full of fun. "We are all here now," returned the former spokesman. "Call the girls and *^1. 11. _ 1 fP1 * • . « wjo «iw uie lunuttN 1.11Vres gumg xo be a set-out of refreshments far you all." " fit's quare works, the night," mut­ tered Terence, though he gleefully summoned his friends, who came troop­ ing in, among them Emmy Grayson, the buxom chambermaid of the village hotel, who had so mysteriously referred last night, to theltss.the master 'was in love with. | "Bite's here," whispered Emmy trium­ phantly into Jimmy's ear, as they went m; **it's the .Tapanee beyant." "Whist, now! 81itop yer gi^lin'! Don't ye see the man at? shpakin"? re­ monstrated Terence. Standing upon a table at the for end of the parlor, Lawyer Speieher was oomin an din g the attention of all present. Most of the guests were still masked, and their grotesque appearance created much merriment among the farmer boys and girls. Order was finally restored just as the clock struck eleven, and Lawyer Speieher began: "Many of yoo. will remember old George Dunstan, and all of you know that atter he died, eight years ago, his nephew, Hugh Mcllvaiu, took posses­ sion or his estate. OU tuou reuoiiect that about that time Harry Dunstan, the old man's son, was expected homo, b^ ttever came. "The deep grief occasioned by the startling news of his drowning in the lake hastened the old man's death. "Just before Mr. Dunstan died he en­ trusted to me a sealed packet, saying he could not feel certain that his dear boy was drowned. Though he had no really good reason for so suspecting, he felt within him­ self an assurance that the sadly bruised body found was not that of his son. That packet I was to open on the first day of this year. I opened it at the appointed time, and will presently tell you what it contained. "Last week an old man named Nat Pierce died in Chicago. By Mr. Mc- Ilvain's instructions I have been paying this old man for seven years past $1,000 on the first day of each year. He sent for me the day before he died, and in the presence of witnesses made a dying statement to the effect that Harry Dunstan was not drowned, as supposed, but had been living with him. The : way it camp about was that Hugh Mc- ' Hvain had intercepted the boy, when on his way home, eight years ago, and with the aid of Nat Pierce had drugged and carried him away into the lumber re­ gion of Michigan, where he has been until recently. "Harry was kept for a long time half- stupefied, and when finally he came to his senses his father was dead, and he was falsely informed by Nat Pierce that all the estate had been wasted in specu­ lation. Hugh McHvain furnished false let­ ters and documents to prove the story, and Nat Pierce agreed to keep the boy in the lumber region as long as he lived, in consideration of $1,000 a year, which he came down to Chicago to get, the last week of every December. On his last trip, in the midst of a holiday spree, he met with an accident which resulted in his death, but not un­ til he had confessed the whole scheme, and the part he and Hugh McHvain took in it. The sealed packet entrusted to me by George Dunstan contained a very affectionate letter regarding the old man's lost son. It stated that Harry would be 25 years old, if he lived, on Jan. 6. this very date, and that if the heartfelt assurance that the son still lived proved true, the accompanying deeds would pass all the property to him. "Neighbors of Hugh McHvain! Let me now present to you the long-lost sou, Harry Dunstan." Lawyer Speieher assisted to his side on the table the gypsy messenger. All present shouted, and pressed as near as they could, and when order was restored Harry thanked them for their hearty welcome. Then, reaching down, he took by the hand the beautiful Yum-Yum, lifted her by his side on the table, and introduced her as his Michigan bride. "Not yet a bride," he said, "but pres­ ently to be one." Out from among the throng there stepped a clergyman, who had come with Lawyer Speicher's party from Chi­ cago, and had been one of the "city fel­ loes," and then and there the happy pair were united. The startling disclosures of the even­ ing will never be forgotten. "Twan't the master at all in ""love with the Japanee," dylared Emmy Grayson. - T « "But I--I love you," stammered Jimmy Burns, with radiant face. "It's mad as the master you are," pro­ tested Emmy. But before another twelfth Night masquerade they were married, and by that time Hugh Mcllvain had been al­ most entirely nnthought of. He was never heard from. * ; Harry and his Yum-Yum still hold happy possession of the estate. The Darky Apologize*. %• * ; A "DVSW MAN,Vvrv" IDs Visit to Parker's Sis', amt tbfe (hftaetts of Jus CTpat 'a Begtfac-iConalirtent Ins to the XML m A paosul uv us was &ttin' in Parker's stor', over what the Caney Creek road crosses the bayou, an' the boys lowed that it was goin' ter be a putty dull Christmas,' fur . we didn't see nothin' comin' our way. Wall, we sot thar chawin' our terbacker an' lendin' out lies at a small rate uv intrust, *when the wust lookin' tramp I ever seed come a-impin' in. He nodded at fust-one an' then tuther, an' then sot down without savin' a word. "Podner," said Parker, as he1 retched over an* sorter poked the fire, "Which way?^ ^Duuno," the tramp replied. V ^ ij "Which way did you come ^ftrbrh?* j • "Dunno." "You aint right bright, are yiWi pod- ner?" <r " "Dunno." • ' '"s - , "What do you know t" ~ vs ; " D u n n o . " f i . • "Wall, now Wr^" said Parker, Itiitifi' a stick uv burnin' wood so hard that it spit a shower uv sparks, "we don't hanker airter these dunno sort uv folks. Ever' time one comes through the neighbor­ hood suthin' turns up miss in'; so ef it's jest the same to you w'y we'd like to see the last uv you putty quick." "Yas." Mose Simmons jinedlin, sorter wallopin' his terbacker round frum fust one jaw to the other, "it's a bad idee to have sich dunno chaps round, specially in the Christmus times; so don't ytfii think it's time you was pullin* out?" "Dunno." Parker he then got up an' tuck him by the ear an' shoved him out. Then we all sot down ter wollopin' our terbacker ergin--we was most too lazy to chaw outright--an' putty soon who should come saunterin' in but Joe Piper. The boys all groaned, fur Joe is a chronic beggar and the laziest man in the world, I reckon. It w»s his hsbit w go about the neighborhood Chrismus times an' beg fur g'ints uv meat an' meal an' sich, fur he gest wouldn't work. "What are you on the skirmish fur now, Joe, meat or meal?" Parker axed. "Nurther one," he replied. Then we boys laughed till the ter­ backer juice ran outen our mouths. "Nq fellers," said he, "I have got a little meat an' meal, but I tell you whut I wush you'd do; wush you'd sorter fling in an' raise me a few dollars; my chillun is about naked an' my little gal ain't got no shoes. It ain't laziness on my part this time, fellers, fur you kiiow that I ain't been able to work sense that saw- log fell on me. I'm afeerd the little gal will have pneumony, for wo k^int keep her in the lufuse. Say, Parker, I've done good deal uv tradin' with you in my time, so now set the ball to spilin' by lettin' me have a few things." . , We had to laugh. "Here," said Patsey Buck; "we'll make you the finest pres­ ent you ever seed," an' theu he tuck up a ole woolen shirt that the tranip had left. It was rolled up in a sort ov bundle, an' was the wust lookin' piece of goods I ever seed. Joe he got mad. "Oh," said Parker, "you've got to take it." A femple of winters ago a pa#f of gentlemen were skating on an Indiana pond, and made their sport more inter­ esting by circling about a large air hole. A husky young colored man joined the sport. He diversified the program by •winding up a pigeon wing with an ac­ cidental dive into the water and under the ice. There was some hustling, but as he failed to immediately reappear every one thought it was a case of teGei * «trueted to deliver this communication at a rv ? ^quarter to eleven on the evening of the ¥£•%&,?.. .JSrelfUi Night festivities. He know^lotli- l ine of the contents except that they are „ , , ' important to you. Old Nat Pioree Rent for small colored funeral om soon as navi<yn sSiV/ fpe last week and made a dying statement f. coioreu iunerai as soon as naviga VH seriously concerns you. ~ A1 '•v ^With severaldistinguishedpolieeofficers. have the pleasure of visiting you at •, ijgifc .'#*M0tly 11 p. m. Respectfully. :®'r SPEICHKB, Attorney." A. moment Hugh Mcllvain stood as if -petrified. The virus upon his temples welled almost to bursting. Then, with ^ a frenzied clutch, he crumpled the sheet IP?- " be still held in his hand, and, uttering K .•incoherent exclamation of dismay, *k« rushed to the hall, seized his hat, and out. tion opened in the spring. While the skaters were standing around the open water the ice behind them began to heave and crack. Suddenly there was an eruption of negro, and a black form stood in about four feet of water and coolly but not calmly surveyed the dam­ age to the last spot of ice on the pond, ttYo' must 'souse me, gents," he re* marked while clambering out. "I'li moughty sorry foah srfoilin' yore fun t But I's powerful strong in de back. :' oouldn't stay under wait 1I1 no ldnger, ftMbre they ,pould recover from lhe I BOOKS are ei» »*1JB& minds--Bovee, of pjit&fcool age, and m tne *£e and in prapolithic man, it is the mmple uae of the hand, or assisted by rude implements; iu the school boy or girl, as £lao in the next highef grade of races, it is by the pse of those finer in­ struments which we call tools; and in the university, as in the most civilized races, it is by the use of scientific instru­ ments and machines. . * A Town with a Hard None. t' Nfew Ettgland rum is fully as deadly til5 Itk method of doing its work as the succulent whisky of Western vintage. A.couple of strangers boarded a train on a certain Veijiiiont. railroad and made each other's acquaintance through be­ ing thrown together by, the destiny of occupying one seat. "Well, what's j'bur objective point?" .inquirtnl one of. tne iwaiu. "Brattleboro,!" replied' the other, suavely. uAh Well, do you mihd taking a drink with me?" and the stranger produced a flask. "Not in the loast," and the two pro­ ceeded to quaff the flowing "bottle. "Ever been to Brattleboto?" inquired the one destined for that locality. "No, I have herd of it quite often. Is it much of a place?" "Which, BratTbo?* "Yes." ' V'. "Oh, yes, Brat'lWis a right lively place." ̂ ; "Have some moro," said the flask man, producing the bottle, "Thanks;-don't believe I could get such an article as that in BrfATbo'," And he took another long, strong pull. They indulged twice more within the next fifteen minutes. They became hilarious. The fun waxed. fast and furious, and the train drew up to Brat- tleboro. "Hersh whersli you go ashore, ish it?" inquired the bottle man. "Don't know but it ish. It ish if thie ish BiT'uu". Shay, conductor, ish this BrTbo'?" " "This is Brattleboro," replied the conductor. " " " ' "Yesh, that's what I said BrTbo'. Fine city. Nish town to draw to," and the bibulous Vermonter crawled off the train, and strayed up the street in search of his' frinds in "BrTbo'."-- Texas Siftings. ; > ' ; 'Changed by a Tropical Sun* A most remarkable growth ©! coral islands, showing the short time required to transform reefs in the dense salt wa­ ter of the Pacific Ocean to large bodies of land, says the Philadelphia Record, reporteid by Capt. Delap, of the Amer­ ican ship Yorktown. which touched at Boston Island in March last, while bound from Philadelphia to Hiogo, Japan. The Yorktown has just arrived at Saudy Hook with a large cargo of general merchandise, and Capt. Delap made close and careful observation not only of the island, but of the nativesalso, The first visit to the island was made by Capt. Duperry, a Boston explorer, in 1824, He named the island after his native city. While there he made an accurate survey of the island as well as the outlaying reefs, over which the sea . made a clean breach at times. The J°e---Dmged if I do. 1 ain t. round largest island was without vegetation or pickin' up ole shirts. Parker--Wull, we'll see that yon pick up this one. Buck--Take it, ur we'll batig you agin that black 00k out thar. Joe--Fellers I didn't think you'd treat me thiser way. Parker--But you think so now. We air not only goin' to make you take it, but we're goin' to make you put it on>. Buck, git that rope over thar, and we'll tie him. He seed that they was to earnest, an' to keep down trouble Joe he tuck holt uv the shirt. "Unroll it," said Buck. He hesitated a minit an' then unrolled it on the counter. Then he uttered a cry an' snatched a roll uv bills, the boys gathered around him, but he whipped out an old pistol an' told 'em to stand back, an' they stood. He smiled, he did, stepped to one side an' counted ten $20 bills. "Here," cried Parker, "this money be­ longs to that crazy tramp. Lets hunt him. Come on, ail hands." We went out an' hadn't gone fur till* we found him layin'side the road. Parker lifted him up an' says: "Didn't you leave seme money back yonder?" The feller he looked at Parker and said: Dunno," then he dropped back dead,. Joe walloped his terbacker from fust one jaw to the other an' said suthin' about shoes.--Opie P.'Head, in Amer- Exile, Without Trial, to Siberia. ' • The forcible deportation of "untrust­ worthy" Russian citizens to Siberia by executive order and without trial first became common in the later years of the reign of Alexander II. Administrative banishment had occasionally been re­ sorted to before tliat time as a conveni­ ent means of getting rid of obnoxious persons; but in 1878 and.1879, when the struggle between the police and the ter­ rorists grew hot and fierce, exile by ad­ ministrative process became a commo| thing, and people who were known to hold liberal opinions, or who were thought to be in sympathy with the rev­ olutionary movement, were sent to Sibera by the soore. If forbidden books, or copies of the "Messenger of ihe Will of the Peoplewere found by the police in a young man's room, the fact was re­ garded as sufficient warrant for his ban­ ishment. If an enthusiastic university student, inspired with an unselfish de­ sire to do something to elevate the lower classes, ventured to open an evening school for factory operatives in the sub­ urbs of St. Petersburg, he was 'settt tO' Siberia by administrative process. If a dozen or more young people were sur­ prised together at night under suspi­ cious circumstances, their names were recorded in the "untrustworthy* list of the police, and the next time the Gov­ ernment found it necessary to "take more vigorous mearures for the preser­ vation of public order," these unfortu­ nate young men and women, who perhap had assembled#nierely to road and dis­ cuss the works of Herbert Spencer or of John Stuart Mill, were arrested and sent to Siberia as conspirators. Friends and relatives of convicted revolutionists were banished by administrative pro­ cess as a matter of course, and long be­ fore the assassination of Alexander H. six or eight young people, represent­ ing all classes and all social grades, had been swept into the prisons by the drag­ net of the police, and sent thence to Siberia by administrative process with­ out even the pretense of a trial.--Geo. Kennan, in the Century. life, and has been so marked on all nav­ igator's charts. When the Yorktown approached the islands the vessel was hove to, and in a short time was sur­ rounded by copper-colored natives of a friendly disposition, who brought with them such fruit as was common to the islands. 'Instead of reefs, as had been seen by Capt. Duperry, there were thirteen islands surrounding salt water lagoon, densely covered with vegetation, and all inhabited. The group was called Ebon Island, and was three miles long, having grown at least a mile in half a century; Three Germans were reported to have recently arrived there from New Zealand^ With the excep­ tion of the latt er visitors who were prob­ ably shipwrecked sailors, and Capt. De­ lap, no white men are known to have visited those islands since they were were first discovered. Not a Bad Word. * Mrs. Sarah Austin tells us in her re­ cently published "Memoirs" that she >vas greatly exercised as to whether she was justified in retaining the word "damn" in the recital of a story of Lord Jeffry and Mr. Sydney Smith. Lord Lyttelton and others protested, it would seem, against it, and Lady Holland sugU gested the substitution of the wore® "hang," Now, why? To "damn" is td condemn; to be "damned" is to be con* demned, while to hang is to execute a condemnation, and to be to die in consequence of a condemn a tion. What, then, can be the difference whether Lord Jeffry "damned" the north pole, whether he expressed a wish that "fc this meteorological point should b^p# hanged ? It is held that to desire thai the north pole or a chair or a horse or £ wife or anythiug or anyone else should be damned is to swear, whereas to ex­ press the desire that a thing or a per­ son should be hanged is not. Asa mat ter of fact, the use of neither of these expressions involves swearing. The are mere foolish uttevances by whicl the person using tiiem wishes to convey the notion that he is displeased With the thing or the person against which eithe; let 1 mav' tvA hnaraa an<i Pagan Ireland The pagan survives in ardbitaotaro. Buildings were generally aaoan and of wood, or round and of wattles plastered with day and painted in bright oolors. After Christianity was established and the use of stone became less rare in re­ ligious and military life, the conserva­ tive bent of the people kept a form of tower no longer represented in Great Britain and the mainland. As early as the twelfth century when the Norman- Welsh began to make stone and rule instead of the exception, Giraldus, the traveled prelate, talks of ecclesiastical towers, 'which, according to the custom of the country are slender and lofty and round." He knew that they were pe­ culiar, but did not suspect that this form of tower represented an inheritance from a pagan religion any more than he •aw the paganism of the rites at the shrine of St. Bright. Yet unlettered Irish tradition has kept the thread of fact without being able to give the his­ torical sequences. In its immediate use the round tower was a sort of mili­ tary necessity, and came after the ruin of monastic settlements by the pagans from the Baltic. During sudden raids it was a place of security which could not be burned down like the timber churches near by or the whattled cabins of monks and clerics within the cashel wall. It was a belfry whence hand-bells were rung to call the students to school and the faithful to prayer: It was a watch-tower and beacon. But it reaches through military usage back to pagan times. In a polished and highly artifi­ cial shape, due to Byzantine science in architecture, it represents the rude wattled house of Gauls. Seeing how the Irish kept heathen ideas in other things, we can perceived how the round wicker house of the Kelt, such as we see it carved on the column of Antoninus at Rome, developed into the wood and wicker outlook tower and be»uun, and in skillful hands became the Irish round tower, perpetuated to our day by the hundred or more shafts of cut stone, which lend charm to as many Irish landscapes. Christian in usage, they are pagan in design. The Northman caused the demand, heathenism sup­ plied the pattern, and Byzantine crafts­ men, driven from the East by the big­ otry of the image-breaking emperors, supplied the science to rear towers more durable, useful, sfmple, yet stately than anything Ireland had seen before or h$s seen since. The history of towers in Mohammedan countries which can be derived from a worship of the heavenly bodies supplies a very, remarkable par­ allel which the archaeologists of the last century perceived but could not define. In America the round tower, with its high entrance and adaption to watchers and sun wpnship, is found among the extinct cliff-dwelling Indians. Towers in Mexico and Yucatan were used for the same purpose. Observe in the round tower preserved at Ardmore the bands which repeat, without any useful object in stone, the horizontal bands that strengthened the tall wicker house of Gauls. Such apparently trivial points weigh heavily in favor of the indigenous character of the round tower of Ireland. --Charles DeKay, in the Century. * A Railroad Train in a Forest Fire. The train, lessening its speed, was obliged to creep* cautiously between rose-red embers of solid cords of roaring wood--the wood which had been cut and piled for commerce. The pine- branches on the fiat-car ignited, driving the brass band into an inclosed carriage for shelter. Men with buckets dropped to ditches beside the track and dipped up water to throw on the train, creeping on the platforms' again with scorched clothes and hands and faces blistered^ One who has never been in a forest fire can scarcely imagine its intense heat, the acrid blinding smoke, the suddenness with which trees flash from root to crown, and grass blazes far from any spark, as if the earth itself were burning, the furnace glow of piled logs, the heated air from baked ground. Incredible sights showed through that nightmare of fire. Moss-inclosed Stumps spurted flames many times their Own height. Young ferns, scarce un­ rolled, sprang green and fresh from oue side of a log, while the other side quivered in living coals. « The train stopped. It could creep in retreat no farther, for its track was burned, the rails warped into fantastic curves. Blackened Jffld leistered jiaint hanged" JL res and Mittens, ETC., ETC. 'im tirades of Culture. i Prof. Joseph Le Conte declaims that for every grade of culture, whither of the individual or of the race, tbdre is a is leveled. 'rDamn" may t>e Coarse an vulgar, for verbal coar seness of vulgarity is conventional. ' I Am not quite sure, however, that the expression 'of a wish that the north pole may be condemned is not a good de^vl more reasonable than that it should bo hanged. Be this, however, as it may, I entirely deny that damning is swearirig:--TruM. _ Entrapping a Bear. ! A hotel man in Indiana is! 'the proud possessor of a black bear, A raccoon, and four foxes, the bear chained in a side room and the other animals in cages. During tlie temporary absence of the proprietors, some village urchins got inside and tormented the bear until he broke his fasti>Jiijigs. Tlid boys ran away and shut the door just in time to prevent an unpleasant acquaintance with Bruin. Left to himself, the tear raised hayoc with the furniture, demol­ ished the cages, and wound up the per­ formance by diving out of a window, taking the s&sh with him. When the proprietor returned, he fouhd the me­ nagerie missing, only the bear being in sight, Underneath a tree at some dis­ tance. An old bear "hunter Was sent for, who,1 after thinking it over, said, solemnly: "Git ten p'unds of that ar brown sugar." The sugar was brought, the hunter took the bag, went ks near to the beat as he dared, opened the bag and made a sugar trail leading into a hogshead in the hotel yard. The crowd stood back, the bear sniffed the sugar, and began to eat. In about three min­ utes he was in the hogshead, which was tipped'over him. Then ensued a ter­ rific struggle, ending in the subjugation of the bear and iutaliutipn in his old qtwters. The iugeirio^s hunter took what was* I^ffc of t.iio sagar as his rer . . M r . G o o d m a n t t a ^ n o d d e n imrifCttttemptR to holp bale bar new wfator ^ " cu, uwa it bU can too, it's only a patent it! There, now, hold it ; ; - - • Slackness, "a^JIsKrd^iSr-T^fiCBr'aF^wnie rows of iron wheels were found where the train came to a stop.--Mary Hart- well Catherwood. in S£. Nicholas. A Biblical Opinion of Man. Wife--The Bible says much in favor of women, John. I thought that the Israelites kept their - women in the background, but if they did the Bible, which is their history, doesn't. Husband--Humph! The Israelites did well by keeping their women in the background; that's where women should be. 4 Wife -- But still the Bible says that- Husband--O, I know there are a few women mentioned in the Bible--there was Jezebel, she was a woman. Wife--Yes; and there was Ahab; ho. was a man. And there was----• Husband--It is no use talking, Mary. The Bible is a history of men. Women are mentioned only incidentally as they had influence on the actions of men. The book says little about women com­ pared to what it does about men! Wife (musingly)--You may be right, John, now when I come to think of it. There is one thing, at any rate, it says about men that it does not say about women. Husband (smiling)--I thought you would come to your senses, Mary. What is it the book says about men that it does not say about women ? Wife (placidly)--It says all men are liars. Then the hitsband arose and put on his hat and went out to see what kind of a night it was .--London Tul-Bits. IT is when landed in the scales of jus- e- tice that the weigh of the transgressor •y: " ^ ..V; 4'.:y «' on _ __ He--Yofc just see i?i can't help you just as well as that blamed English maid. Confound it. after Pve helped you once you'll lie wanting me all the time, see if you don't. She--Well, put it on carefully now over my head. Look out for my nsir; I don't see what possessed me to do it up this thing on, though! couldn't have raised my arms, I suppose, afterward. Look out, there's a hook caught in my hair-pin. For Heaven's sake, Charles, get it one way or the other, I'm stifling, and my hair will all be down. There, now that top steel is too high and the cushion interferes with it. Suppose you could get the nii«bion out? Kip ft, pull it, anything! Don't you see it is 8 o'clock? Got it out? Can you do it?. PuU it, I tell you! AH right. Now see if * it looks too flat. Well, hook it then. Yes, you hook. Snap so 1 can get my arms into the sleeves--not way up there do you take me for a contortion- !st? Oh, I never can get those sleeves on--grab hold of the arm-hole with both hands, Charles, and give it a good pull up onto my shoulder--tell mo if it be- ging to burst--does it? The veins in my hands will burst, I believe--open that window, will you--there now-- give me the ends of that belt, will you-- don't tell me, Charles, that you've twisted the waist and I've got to take it off again! Why, how could you have been so stupid ? Where are your eyes? No, you can't pull it off that way--pull it off just as you do a glove--there, now, do exert yourself to get it right this time. Open that win­ dow a little wider, will you? What it the matter, caught something? Well, never mind. Unhook your watch and let the chain hang on the dress--it won't be likely to fall off, and you mustn't tear that lace--well, Til get you an­ other one if you lose it--do get those sleeves on again--there, now, pass me the belt. Oh, that fool of a dress­ maker, she's got this so tight, when 1 told her I wanted to be comfortable. Open that door, will you, so there will be a draught. Now see if you can hook this waist up. No; begin at the bottom. Why, don't you see, the hooks and eyes alternate on each side, so as to make it hold? Can't you get it together? Why, pull, I can stand it. Torn your fingei nails out? Well, for Heaven's sake, Charley, don't notioed it now. I've .got something 111 put on it after we get home. Can you hook that last hook, up on my left shoulder; and then that one down on my right hip! Now, get a good, firm hold of the bot­ tom of my skirt, and give it a pull down all round. Now do get Out of the waj and let me look in the mirror. Heav­ ens ! I look like a perfect dump. Tip the mirror up a little more, will you' No, not that way--the other way--and go get me your hand-glass, won't yo^l Turn the gas up a little higher, and d« keep out of my way; I can't 6ee t square inch of my dress. Well, it lookt a little better than I thought it did al first. Just give that drapery behind s smooth, will you? and pull that ruching up in my neck. There, now, put bote your hands around my waist, and give il a good hard smooth down. There, 1 guess that will do now. I look verj well. But for goodness sake don't evei ask me to let you help me again.--Bos ton Saturday^ Gazette. ? Ci ' . Horse Shoeing*., t "Save at the spigot and losesfr^fle bung." Sharpening time is at handj with its glairy surfaces and slippery pavements. Our unlucky friend, the horse, at tliic season of the year, feels, no doubt, thai his lot is far from a happy one. Drives with heavy loads, over places where, if his calks are not in good condition, he cannot stand at all, he sprawls along; straining every muscle to keep his foot ing. The wear and tear on the muscu' lar fibres of the animal is immense, ano it is not less upon those important mem­ bers, the feet. The frequent shoeing, consequent on the necessity for sharf calks, almost honeycombs" the hornj shell of the hoof. At this time it is well for the horse owner to remember that stiff, steel; nails, such as are made by the cold clip­ ping and rolling process, with theii sharp edges and unyielding blades, work on the fibres of the hoof, and en­ large the holes, thus weakening ita structure. The Putnam Horse Nail ii the only one made by machinery in th< world which is hot forged,} and drawt from head to point and not clipped in any manner during the process; ano from the fact of its round edges not cut­ ting into the hoof and the possibility of using a smaller nail for the saniQ work, it is the most desirable for the sharpening season. From the method of its manufacture it cannot split or sliver in driving, anc there is no possibility of loss from that cause. Some smiths make a practice ol using the cheapest of cheap nails in the winter time, on the ground that as the shoes do not have to stay on so long, anything in the shape of a nail will answer. This is mistaken economy oc their part, for it does not pay to use the cold cut and rolled nails at any price. The difference in price between the Putnam, which is necessarily higher be-, cause of its superiority and extra cost of manufacture, and the cut nails, is only about two cents a pound, which al­ lowing a quarter of a pound to shoe t horse, would be a saving to the smith of a half a cent on each animal, provided he did not have to throw away and oi the cheap and dangerous cut nails, all of which are liable to split or sliver in driving. If a piece of one of these brit­ tle naUs is broken off in your horse'^ foot, you must either split the hoof opei to get it out, or be pretty sure to lose the animal by lockjaw. s If you are a horse owner do not let || blacksmith save a half a cent by using any other nail than the Putnam on youi horse. You may save the animal much trouble by not permitting him to ruij into danger. > If you are a smith, do not, run the risk of losing your good reputation as a shoer, or render yourself liable to paj for a valuable horse, by endeavoring ta save one-half a cent in shoeing him.--r Boston Cultivator. No More Theatricals. 1 Now York Sheriff (to oondemned murderer)--Here is a chair, say yout prayers and take a seat in it. The elec­ trician is ready. Prisoner--lull? Won't there be ne ,procession--no parade ? "None." ? ; "No walking with firm step Up the gallows?" "None." "No big crowd ran' chance fbt n& to make a speech an I die game ?" " "No. You die right here." "My! Mj! Oh, my! I--I 't done Philadelphia nnmtm -The holfr it marta - '"i -Aherdol elephant*. cm laUM* 'M* Btnaawrfioor Time. m A a RAND TBCLK- --Danville Breeze. BACK YARDS--Long dresses.--E. C. Culp, \ THK natural guardian of a woman is her tongue.--Dr. F. M. Wilder. " , AN organ grinder may not be able to^p wing a note, yet he eaafy cameo a tune. ,|f| IF every person wouldbe haU as good as he expects his neighbors to bo. what ̂ a heaven this world would aee«*--W. 8. :; Calhoun. fig IT is hard for a woman to aee how -3 anybody in this world can bo blae and | disconsolate when she has jut got ar new sealskin jacket.--JoumM of Edfc.M cation. SOME one claims that nofidnc Is aa-^J solutely fire-proof." . Well, if asnes not fire-proof, we dout know wha proof you would want. -- Yonkers Statesman. *, A NATOBAI. consequence: Clam-- i Mr. Fledgeby has been paying me some Vi absurd compliments, Belinda. Belinda '- --Oh, they must have been.-- land Transcript. BIGGS--What makes you iookso glum to-day, Boggs? Boggs--I have suc-pf ceeded in persuading my wife to with- draw her application for a divorce.-- !'- Bur ling ton Free Press, 'ivl DAMASCUS blades were possessed of • a wonderfully good temper. How they managed to preserve this we don't * know, as they were used to carve in Turkey.-- Christmas Puck. ^ FITTZPHOPP -- Waitah! a lobstah, \ whole, and fully dwessed. Waiter-- * Yes, sir. With or without? Fittzphopp ..5 ---it!* ox *riiuwuu v,nub; w tttxer--jtne ̂ eyeglass.--Philadelphia Call. ^ YOUNG teacher (closing a talk to the < school)--Now, scholars, in what way;:'.-"'., could I rise higher in your estimation Toot's boy (on a back seat)--By Bitting C > downon a bent pin, sir.--Time. 7* >, INDULGENT Papa--Why, my dear, \ « you had a party last month. How often ^ do you wish to entertain your friends? iv She--This one is not to entertain my ; ^ friends, papa, but to Bnub my enemies.'I;' --Life. A VASSAR girl sat on her best fellow's hat as they basked in the moonlights^ with classical chat; but she put in her 7 thumb and pulled out her gum and f made it all up with a thrilling yum, J yum. WOMEN charm, as a general thing, inf^| proportion as they are good. A plain ! face with a heart behind it irf worth a ' world of beauty. Men who have t r ied* ' both uniformly agree to this.-~ & StewarlA MB. O'FLYNJT--Poor onld Peter Flan- nigan was run over this mornin'. Mrs. O'Flynn--Och, an' was he kilt? Mr.;f"7- O'Flynn--How could he be kilt, youF- j fule, when his loife'a insured?--New • i York World. • A.--How is it that Herr Schmidt, ( whose hair was gray last week, has gotSgf jet black hair now? B.--Since then liepfiS has become a widower, and has regon<* into mourning for his depavfed wife.-- •. . Texas Siftings. J|i REJOICE, Ethelred, that you are not a great man. One hundred years hence , 1 you will be able to sleep quietly, with­ out caring whether contemporary no- tices are prejudiced or posthumous no-1 \ ; tices untrustworthy.--Puck. ||S "CAN'T a woman kiss her dog if she|§| wants to?" writes a fair subscriber. Well, yes, she can now, but she couldn't^ ! while Henry Bergh was alive. Ah, the| poor dogs will never know what a friendp: they lost when Henry died.--Burdette. THE doctor advised a nervous woman to sit in the same room with a rat for,. twenty minutes. She endured it just J,, eleven seconds and then jumped thronghf.^ a window and broke both legs. The in- "4 genioua doctor got a job.--Exchange. WHEN Col. Sozzle was abroad his^"; opinion was asked at a cattle show of!?' | the English shorthorn. The Colonelast| promptly answered that there was no|s|| shorthorn in the world to be compared- with the American gin oooktail.--Bos- ton Bulletin. "I DON'T see why you don't get rich.-: You sell a mainspring for $1.50 that J only costs you 10 cents." "That may /; be true, sir, but we have to keep three, ! ̂ clerks to wait on the lady shoppers, and we must get our money book in some way."--Jewelers' Weekly. "THAT play of 'Frozen Hearts' is just too lovely for anything! "Yes, it is angf J exquisite mellow drama." "You mean ' melodrama?" "No I don't." "But whyCifj *do you call it a mellow drama?" "Be- \ «i cause it's so soft."--Chicago Ledgers? 4 Miss BEAUTY -- Do you remember • that French Count who followed me / from place to place, and u«*clared helfg was dying of love for me? Well, his"/.' family have put him in a lunatic asylum. Rival Belle- -I am not surprised. I al­ ways did think he was crazy.--New; - , Fork Weekly. S/S "I WONDER what has become of Mrs. || De Brown? She married my divorced^ husband, you know." "She went to ai'vl! revival meeting the other evening, and, * she soys she's 'wrestling with Satin.' "She has no chance to win, then; her > ' husband is as strong as a horse."-- braska State Journal. f'f "WHY musn't I stand up on the seat?" said a small boy to his ihotber in a su­ burban train the other day. "Because /, I know you will fall over and knock' ; Miss Blank's hat offi" was the maternal// reply. The small boy remained silent - < for a moment, while he took stock of * the hat on the lady in front. Then ho . said in judicial tones: "Why, mamma,/Sj that's the hat you said you'd knocked off /; Miss Bl'ank's' head if you were her mother!"--Pittsburgh Dispatch. & ANOTHER VICTIM Snugly they nit, close side by slSa. ii Before the glowing grate, '» ,.In cushioned armchairs, <ioop wtAwtf/i1 In cozy tete-a-tcte. . |||! The whitening corii-poppOT ha flwlw '-i< Above the ruddy coals, - f ;c While she its foamy contents WSCM ..v; And fills the heaping bowla. . • He shakes and shakes with Pausing, as you infpr, A moment now and then to A sidelong glance at her. "Do you like corn?" he asks, sfofto Sfcflfc1': Once when the popoer stops ; stii "O, yes," says she; "do yon kai»w--t-- Like anything that pops.' " ^-William H. Mill*. "ft-•f - A Considerate Lever. | When Dusenbury came homo in tho/ / evening he noticed a new hitohen^oa^^ l in front of the door. "Who put that there?" he asked. " Charlie," replied his daughter. "You#^| aee, his horse 'chawed' the other one aU/j| up," she added with a blush. "It waai^ considerate in Charlie, wasn't it ?" /ftl "Yes," grunted Dusenberty. "And|/^ while he was about it he migltf oon- vp; siderate some more. Some kerosene and coal would be a fair consideration Detroit JVae for last