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'M I F V . VR ^ ' v$*-. . "1;-: DKKAttlN' O' HOXX. tHaMkt tell what's com* to her, aa* y»fc I think it's clear fsomethin'H goin' wrong o' late--to tee hsr «. nitt in' tlipr» •Jt<frrw<nii> in the doorway, -with that look into her eyes. , '.AMef they mill WM reatiu'ou theolo time fields v end skies. m** always dreamln', * dreamia' o' the life we - •.>,.• left behind, iK» little two-room cottage where the morula' glorias twined; "JBw roses in the garden, the yellow sunflowers ' Dm violet*--but she herself the sweetest <lo*rer o' all. - Jfcm aee, she aster ell there in the doorway, so ,. content, "Wb» sunflowers follerin' the snn, no matter " s where he went. ,i ;9n brown bees sippin' honey and a-uuz»in roses cllmbin' up to her an' wnilin' lit her face. ' -Jtfc' now she eni.%forget. It. When I tell her: - "Little wiwT „ Haert> aim 110 vise in grievin' for .that simple country life," '«» twines tier arms aronn* my neck, an' smilin' sweet to see, eaya : "It seems BO far away to where we useter be !" • iVw ain't no use in ohldin", or sayin' words o' "ffcere's nothin' in the city like she Was useter there: "'Where preachin' cum but o&ce a month an' street cars didn't run, .JtgL' folks they tole the time o' day by lookin' at ;'V the sun" - - : -4»° larks got np at peep «* dawn aft'made the V-'^r madders ring; i- . -i • XM1 you folks, when one's brought up to jes' . that kind o'thing, . WS& bard to git away from it; old feeling's bound to rise, Ap? make a runnin' over In a woman's tender eyes, jBe there she sits a-drearuin', till I git to /: " <lyoamin'. too. JtW when her he.vl droops ^oep falls like the dew JMa* ckV$*:s them sweet eyes o' hers, once more ' we seem to be Mta the o":d home, where will rest some day to­ gether--her and me. -- -- C o n s t i t u t i o n . on my breast an' REWARD OF ,.V ll\ ^About twenty years ago there lived a •^Ibgalar old gentleman in the Hall -aaioiig the Elm Trees. He was about tfccee score years of ago, very rich, and somewhat odd in his habits ; butforgen- •ewsity and benevolence he had no «}uaL No poor cottage stood in need of comforts, which he was not ready to ««pply; no sick man or woman lan- pushed for want of his assistance; nor '•wen a begger, unless a known impos­ tor, went empty handed from the Hall. Now it happened that the old gentle- atan wanted a boy to wait on him at table, and to attend him in different 'ways, for he was very fond of young people. But as much as he liked the society of the young, he had a great aversion to that curiosity in which many people are too apt to indulge. He used to say: "The boy who will peep into a drawer will be tempted to take some- tbiag out of it; and he who steals a penny in his youth will steal a pound in tos manhood." This disposition to re- {press evil as well as to encourage good «oo<luct, formed a part of his character, , for though of a cheerful temper, and not given to severity, he woul* not pass <teex a fault till it was acknowledged or •BepMited of. iXo sooner was it known that he was £a want of a servant, than twenty ap­ plications were made for the situation; %»fc he determined not to engage any till las had ascertained that he did not pos­ sess a curious, prying disposition. St was Monday morning that seven H«£s'dressed in their Sunday clothes, -with bright and happy faces,- made rftbeir appearance at the Hall, each of r litem desirous of obtaining the situation 'AMT applied for. Now the old gentle- : 4BHn, being of a singular disposition, had , prepared a roam in such a way that he vMiight easily know if any of the young tj^eple who applied to be his servant *were given to meddling unnecessarily with things around them, or to peep into cupboards and drawers. He took «sore that tbe lads who were then at Elsr Tree Hall, should be shown into Ahis room, one after another. Jkt first James Turner was shown into mm TOSJEU and told that he would have »fc>wait a little; so James sat down on a 'tfeair near the door. For some time he was quiet and looked about him, but ~Vihere seemed to be so many curious things in the room that at last he got - *p to peep at them. <Ga the table was placed a dish-cover, Isnd James wanted sadly to know what | ••asunder it, but he felt afraid to lift it j i ' •p. Bad habits are strong things, and i James was of a curious disposition; he j could not withstand the temptation of tekitig one peep; so he lifted the cover. This turned oat to be a sad affair; for j miliar the dish cover was a heap of j ; Sght feathers; part of the feathers 1 icawn up by the current of air, flew j •bout the room, and James in his! tight, putting down the cover hastily, Buffed the rest of them off the table. :,w What was to be done? James began aaickly to pick up the feathers, one M Cy one; but the old gentleman who was y , fc the adjoining room, hearing a scuffle, j guessing the cause, entered the | yli : *oom, to the consternation of James ICurner, who was very soon dismissed t' 0M8 a boy who had not principle enough resist the slightest, temptation. When the room was once more ar- (ganged, Thomas Hawker was placed if?,^sftere until such time as he should be i-'-sent for. No sooner was he left to him­ self, than his attention was attracted by i* plate of fine ripe cherries. Now Thomas was uncommonly fond of cher­ ries, and he thought it would be impos- -att'le to miss one among so manv. He S«wked and longed, and longed and iooked for some time, and just as he ;•, aa»l got off his seat to take one, he teard as he thought a foot coming to iiae door; but no, it was a false alarm, taking fresh courage, he went and took a very fine cherry, for he was deter- -auaed to take but one, and put it into •aia mouth. It was excellent; and he then persuaded himself that he ran no (great risk in taking another: that he lid, and hastily popped it into his month. placed » Jew small cherries at, the top f v oC the others, filled with Cayenne pep- V"-1* «|»r; one of these, Thomas had unfor- ! *X.-i innately taken, and it made his mouth A >• '/ ^ nnart and burn intolerably. The. old '* £(•" ' gentleman heard him coughing, and kaew very well what was the matter, .i' , • .rhe boy who would take what did not f" belong to him, if no more than a cherry, fK . . -««a not the boy for him. Thomas Haw- V, ;; tor was sent about his business without ; » 6 farther delay, with his mouth almost as B 'i<* as if he had put a burning coal v * .5 - ^ bto it. ^ ' William Barker was next introduced r' ioto the room and left to himself; but % i 'ii"' t had not been in the room two min- stes before he began to move from one place to another. He was a bold reso- late temper, but not overburdened with •riaciple. Having looked around the mom, he noticed a drawer to the table, ini made up his mind to peep therein, Imfeno sooner did he lay hold on the faotob of the drawer, than he set a large toll ringing, which was concealed un tor the teble. The old gentleman, im entered the room. "William was so startled at the sodden ringing of the bell, that all his impudence conld not support him; he looked as though any one might knock him down with a feather. The old gentleman asked him if he rang the bell because he wanted anything? William was much confused and stammered, and tried to excuse himself, but all to no purpose, for it did not prevent his being ordered off the premises. Samuel Jones was then shown into the room by an old steward; and being of a curious disposition, he touched nothing, but only looked at the things about him. At last, he saw that a closet door was a little open, and think­ ing that it would be impossible for any one to know that he had opened it a little more, he very cautiously opened it an inch further, looking down at the bottom of the door, that it might not catch against anything and make a noise. Had he looked at the top, instead of the bottom, it would have been better for him, for at the top was fastened a plug, which filled the hole of a small barrel of shot. He ventured to open, the door, till the plug being pulled out of the barrel, the leaden shot began to pour out at a strange rate; at the bottom of the closet was placed a pan, and the shot falling upon this made such a clatter that Samuel was frightened out of his senses. The old gehtleman soon came into the room to inquire what was the matter, and there he saw Samuel as white as a sheet. It now came Harry Roberts turn to be put into the room. The other boys had been sent to their home in differ­ ent directions, and no one knew what the experience of others bad been in the room of trial. On one table stood a small, round box, with a screw top to it, and Harry thinking it contained something curious, could not be easy without unscrewing the top, but no sooner did he do this, than out popped an artificial snake fully a yard long, and fell upon his arm. He started back and uttered a scream, which brought the old gentleman to his el­ bow. There stood Harry with the bot­ tom of the box in one hand, the top in the other and the snake on the floor. "Come, come," said the old gentleman, handing him out of the room, "one snake is quite enough to have in the house at a time, therefore the sooner you are gone the better ;n with that he dismissed him without waiting a mo­ ment for his reply. Roger Bell next entered the room, and being a'one. soon commenced amusing hims«-lf by looking at the curi­ osities around him. Roger was not only curious and prying, but dishonest too; and observing that the key was left in the draver of a book-case, he stepped on tiptoe in that direction,- but the moment he touched the key, which had a wire fastened to it, communicat­ ing with an electric machine, Rogeir re­ ceived such a shock as he was not likely to forget. No sooner did he suf­ ficiently recover himself than he was told to leave the house and leave other people to lock and unlock their own drawers. The last boy was John Grove, and though he was left alone in the room full twenty minutes, he never during the time, stirred from the chair. John had his eyes in his head as well as the others, but he had more integrity in his heart; neither the dish-cover, the cher­ ries, the drawer-knob, the round-box, the closet-door, nor the key tempted him to rise from his seat, and the conse- j quence was that in half an hour, he was engaged in the service of the old gentleman at Elm Tree Hf^ll. John Grove followed his old master to his grave, and received a large legacy fos his upright conduct in his service. Read this, ye busy, meddling, peeping, pilferring young people, and imitate the example of John Grove. |k KO PHANTOM APPEARED. Lui Capt. Kidrt's Might Was s Qatat On« Along the Jermty Coant. The night of Friday, October 11, was what Ifli familiarly known along the New Jersey coast as "Capt. Kidd's Night," when, according to local song and story, the victims and all the accursed crew of that bloodthirsty pirate rise from their graves and along the shore re-enact scenes done while in the body., This is tradition, and to many seafar­ ing Jersey men truth. They "believe just as much in well-regulated ghosts, specters and such gruesome things as thev do in their own identity. Accord­ ing to their gospel, the seashore Firday night should have been thronged with ill-conditioned ghosts, poorly-clad skeletons aud a heterogenous aggrega­ tion of supernatural horrors. But it wasn't. It was the sort of night when any well-meaning ghost would like to leave the portals of the tomb and raise high jinks among the blackened ribs of lost ships on the beach. The beach was deserted by all save the life-savers, who patrolled their usual beats hollow with fear and trembling. Merrily the inquiry for ghosts was sent by telephone from life-saving sta­ tion to life-saving station, from Sandy Hook to Cape May Saturday Morning, and as a result Superintendent Harvens assured the anxious that the spooks and specters had remained within the shadowy precincts of the tomb. In every place along the coast where Capt. Kidd buried his gold they say that not a single avaricious phantom came 0 steal the hidden treasure. These facts all go to prove that there ha ^ been a general reform of this particular brand of ghosts, for heretofore on the night of October 11, in every year, spooks were seen digging up and dragging off buried gold all along the coast, while in some places doubloons covered with green mold were found. Around Barnegat Friday night was ter -led "Wreckers' Night," and a differ­ ent variety of specters enjoyed the even­ ing air and haunted the lonely shore. The ghosts thereabouts are those of the victims of the old-time marauding Jerseymen who by false beacons de­ coyed vessels to wreck and ruin on the coast. The appearance of tliesfe specters seem to be better authenticated than those of Kidd's kind, for the notorious "Wreckers of Barnegat" are figures in local history and their descendants live in Ocean County at this day with heredi­ tary evil propensities, kept in subjection by fear of the law. The memory of the "oldest inhabitant" is not overhauled in vain for tales of rapine and murder by night in the storm on the shore. Jonathan Spauldin, of Metedeconk, alleges that on the night of October 11, away back somewhere in the last cen­ tury, his great grandfather. Cyrenius Spauldin, and Job Hulit saw a strange right, a sort of blue glare at sea, off Mantoloking. That the blue glare ex­ tended and showed in the center of a great circle of flame a great ship-of-t he- line. The vessel came close into shore and the movements of thoso on board were plainly seen by the wondering fishermen. Then the blue glare deep­ ened into a great ghostly flame and the Jerseymen were horrified to see a long procession of women and children made to "walk the plank" into watery graves. The light, infernal as it seemed, was so intense that every line of the ship and every movement of her crew were plainly visible. Not a sound was heard by the awed and horrified Jerseymen, who, perfectly petrified with terror, made no outcry, but silently watched the minutest details of the tragedy. This scene was enacted, so she happens to like the first look of you, she'll hand out cold meat aud bread, and perhaps a boiled egg and an old pair of boot* to go with it, but if she's the least bit out of sorts she straightens up, extends her arm, and tragically ex­ claims : 'Now you git!' And i meander and try the next" Such Strange Folks. Anthony Phillips is a well-known citizen of Little Rock. He is some­ thing of a politician, havjng at different times worked with the Democratic and Republican parties; but his chief dis­ tinction is that he is the blackest negro in Arkansaw. The other day Anthony went into a life insurance ollice and asked for the man who I paid out the money. "What do you want?" the manager asked. "I want er thousand dollars," the ne­ gro answered. "Erbout three months erge I had my wife's life insured in this company an' now I want my money, for de lady is dun dead. Yere's de papers,, yere da is, sah." "What was the matter with her?" the manager asked. "Got drownded, sah; was down in de country an' fell offen er foot-log inter de water an' drownded ez dead as er mackerel." " • "Did anybody see her when she.fell in ?" "Ya«, little gal seed her; oh, she fell in all right, and now ef you'll jest count me out er thousand' dollars I'll be mighty 'bliged ter von. Yas, fell in all right enough." "Did the coroner hold an inqUest over her?" the manager asked. " "N-n-n-no, .sah, hedidnV - "Why?" , "Wall, sail, me an' dat man doan speak ter one nuder. We ain't on de same quality er tall now, sah. Wife she got mad wid him some time ergo an'den me an'him fell out, an' when my wife wnz tuck outen de bayou, dead and gone, w'y I didn' think it wuz jest de right thing ter hab dat coroner holdin' his proceedin's over her." "So you buried her without the coro­ ner being notified." . "Yas, sah, dat's wbut we done-- 'zfickly wliut we done under de 'zistiug, sarcumstances, sah. Yas, we done dat." "Where did you bury her?" "Huh--oh, wliar did we bury her?" "That's what I asked." "Yfcs, tibby sho*. We sent her 'way off yander wliar her sister libs, sah. Uster say dat w'en she died she wanted ter be buried 'way off yander, caze she tuck er likin' ter dat country." " What is the name of the place ?" "Oh, it's er little bit o' er place, sah; 'tain't ez big ez Argentry jes' ercross de riber vere. Yras, mighty little, no- 'count kind o' er place--so little dat you wouldn' know it ef you wuz tei see it, sah." "I don't care anything about the size. What is the name!'" "Oak Bluff is de name o' de plpco, ef dat's whut you wanter know. 'Way off yander an' er small place, too." "Well, no matter how far nor how small. We'll send a man out there to dig her up aud bring her back before we pay you, but mind you, if she can't be found, we'll have you sent to the penitentiary for ten years." "Oh, well, now, ef dat's de way you do business you neenter send atter de lady. Jes' let de blame money go. I 'spize ter hab dealin's wid sich strange folks."--Arkansaw Traveler. Brigham Young's Penitentiary. When Brigham Young, of apostolic (?)fame, built the abobe penitentiary for Utah for the punishment of bad Mormons and worse Gentiles he dido not think that he should have lived to spend a day and a half in it himself. Yet such was the irony of fate. To-day over half of the occupants of the cells are Mormons, sentenced under varying terms under the anti-polgamy laws. Fifty of the eighty Mormons now in­ carcerated are undergoing sentence for tbe crime, which in the language of the Federal courts of Utah consists of "holding out two or more women as wives." Gentiles too are frequently imprisoned, and their offenses are gen­ erally of horse thieving, murder and train robbery. All alike,vthe Mormom martyr and gentile sinner, wear prison garb and eat prison fare. The penitentiary is four miles south of Salt Lake city. The Wils on the ex­ terior are worn and : dilapidated, for abobe buildings do uotjyery long with­ stand the climate of U tab.! But inside the place has undergone , & mighty change since the time of Brigham Young. The old wooden cells have been torn away and Uncle ' Sam has wisely substituted a modern convict residence with all the modern improvements. When a Mor­ mon now enters the door of his cell, there is a mental enclosure on every side of him. Truly times have changed during the last thirty years, for in­ stead of bad Mormons saintly aposilea are now imprisoned. His Narrow Escape. Emma--No, George, it cannot be. We must part. (Bitterly). My purse- proud father would not accept a poor man for his son-in-law. George (frantically)--Say not so. I cannot give thee up. My heart will break. I-- l;> [Purse-proud father enters the room without observing them. Throws him self into a chair and groans aloud]-- Spauldin story goes, in a silence like that of the grave. The last in the line of victims were two girls with lovely faces, who clung to each other in terror, but were shoved down the plank and into, the water. Everything was motion­ less for an instant afterward. The silence was broken by the ship's bell tolling solemnly three times, a thunder­ ous report sounded over sea and shore, the bright glare faded away into the black vault of the skies and then the ship sank. This tale was told all through Metedeconk and will be told there until Jerseymen are no more.-- Philadelphia Frews. He Didn't Know Himself. A great man--at least he was called a great man, although be might have had his private doubts about it, knowing *Pe i himself pretty thproughly--being some Bankruptcy! Ruin! Every dollar R George (sweeping away himself at these words)--Farewell, then, Emma, since you discard me. (But he says to himself)--Mighty narrow escape, that. --Texas Siftings. A Sore Cure. Lady Visitor (at office of eminent phy­ sician)--I have called, doctor, to ask if there is any cure for sleep-walking. I have had the habit for years, and lately it has become worse. Dr. High price--It can be cured, madam. Take this prescription, and have it filled at Colde, Steele & Go's." "Colde, Steele & Co's? Why, that is not a drug store. It is a hardware firm." ¥es, madam. The prescription calls for a paper of tacks. Dose--two table- spoonfuls scattered about the floor be­ fore retiring."--New York Weekly. "BOERHAAVE," says Johnson, "was never soured by calumny and detrac­ tion, nor ever thought it necessary to con­ fute them; for," said he, "they are sparks which, if yon do not blow them; n i t o f l i i p t n 1 w i f f l n w n s , a n d ^ i U g o « u f c o i t h e f l f t M . A Sad Accident Western Judge--You are charged, sir, with being the leader of a party which hunted down and lynched a horse thief. The days have gone by when citizens of this great common­ wealth can thus take the law into their own hands, hence your arrest. What have you to say ? Prominent Citizen--I ain't guilty, jedge, I'll tell you how it was. We caught the feller, and tied his hands and feet. Nothin' wrong about that, was there, jedge? "No, that was no doubt necessary." "Wall, jedge, there was a storm comin' up and we couldn't spare him au umbrella very well so we stood him un­ der a tree. That WM all right wasn't it?" •• "Certainly." Wall, the clouds kept gatlierin' an' the wind was purty high, and we didn't want him blown away, so we tied a rope around his neck and fastened the other end to the limb above--not tight, jedge, jest so as to hold him--and Ave left him standin' solid on his feet. Nothin' wrong about that, was there?" "Nothing at all." "Then I kin be excused, can't I?" "But the man was found suspended from that tree, and stone dead the next morning." "None of us had anything to do with fiat, jedge. You see we left him landin' there in good health and spirits, fer we give him atl he could drink when we said 'good-by'; but you see, during the night the rain come up an' I 'spose the rope got purty wet and shrunk a couple o' feet. That's how the sad acci­ dent happened, jedge."--New York Weekly. time dead was allowed to visit his earthly home again, in spirit. His first appearance was in the cemetery where his remajn8hatl been interred, and there he saw a lofty and elaborate monument bearing his name, but when he read the long and eulogistic inscription thereon, it credited him with so many shining qualities and supreme virtues that he couldn't recognize liimseli at all. "This must have been some namesake of mine," he thought, "that I never knew." It seemed strange, too, that this great man could have been a con­ temporary of his and escape his atten­ tion, both bearing the same name. Then he strclled around to his old home aud took a look at his familiar library. There the family had deposited all the obituary addresses, testimonials, and memorials that had been collected con­ cerning him and his greatness, and there was a big scrap-book, filled with obituaries clipped from hundreds of pa­ mpers, all lauding his talents and virtues to the skies. He blushed as much as a spirit is able to blush as he read these fulsome praises and thought how poorly he deserved them; and what was curiuus about it, many of these lauda­ tory editorials were clipped from papers that had i>ersistently abused him during his earthly career. He sighed as he closed the book, and murmured, "Yes, it is really me they are writing about, but it is difficult to realize it. That was my monument, too, over in the ceme­ tery yonder. Well, I might as well go back and stay there. If I ever wished to resume my earthly existence that settles it. I never could live up to that monument and those obituary testimo­ nials. All I ask now is to; stay dead. And he crept back into his crypt.-- Texas Siftings. . • : v Done by Personal Experience* I "Is it true," was asked of an old tramp who reached town the other day on the bumpers of a freight train, "that tramps leave marks on gate posts, sign boards, doors and other places to tell the next comer what reception he may expect?" "Naw!" was the indignant reply. * But how do you tell ?" . "Personal experience, my boy, and that's uncertaiu. If the house looks all right and there are no men around, and the dog is chained u»> in the barn, you enter the gate and knock at the side door or go around to the back. If the woman isn't up stairs sewing and if none of the young 'uns are down with the measles, and if she hasn't got call­ ers in the parlor, she'll answqr your kuockt" "And then it's all right." ^ "Not by a long shot! If the happens to be in good humor, and if her hus­ band has promised her a new fall hat, And if har nil right, if Put It In the Law. There is one other thing that ought to be made a penal offense, with a mini mum fine of at least $200, with impris­ onment for not less than six months It is that of doubting the statements of a man who has been a-fishing. Fish have been caught ever since fish-hooks were invented. The fish were made to be caught. They rather expect it. It is no trick at all to catch fish. And yet as Jones returns from his vacation he if met and asked: • "Been away?" "Yes." "Up north?" "Yes." "Went fishing, I suppose?" "Of course." "Catch anything?" "Certainly." "H'm! Caught some four-pounders, I presume?" "Yes, I caught one which weighed seven pounds." "H'm! Good-bye!" Jones not only caught one weighing seven pounds, but a number which wejghea five and six pounds apiece, but he dare not speak of it. Even with what he did say he felt that the other man believed him to be a liar. As lie walked on he felt belittled and degraded, and he made up his mind to tell a bold lie on the next occasion, and declare he did not even see a fish while he was gone. Something should be done in this matter, and it cannot Ite done too soon. A man should be protected in telling the truth as well at in lite* and •Umh. --jJetroil Frw Frrntm* \ i „ yk An Unsold Bonnet. It was evening in Oxford street, fart before the hour of lamp-lighting. The daylight colors had faded and the twi­ light softness had not yet begun, so that the street picture was painted in unsoftened black and white. Gas was beginning to twinkle, however, in some of the shop windows and up-stairs in the millinery show-room of Mr. X a boy had just come in with a taper and had left a bright illumination be­ hind him. The light fell upon two figures--a customer, doubtful and dis­ satisfied, and a young woman in black, who stood before her, displaying bon­ net after bonnet. "These are quite new, ma'am; the very latest thing from Paris." "Yes," said the customer, hesitat­ ingly. "Would you not try this on, ma'am? I am sure it would suit you." "I don't like a straw bonnet for win­ ter." "We could make you one in velvet ma'am." "Velvet spoils so with the rain. Are you quite sure those are all the felts you have that you showed me ?" "All in brown, ma'am. We could get you one made in any shape you like to order." "Oh, no; I could not order one with­ out seeing it," said the lady. Then she took up one which she had looked at al­ ready, poised and examined it, and finally tried it on, and decided for tbe second time that it would not do. "It really is very extraordinary that you should not have one in brown," she said in a tone of annoyance. For a moment the girl did not answer; she had grown paler and her eyebrows were drawn to­ gether with an expression of anxiety and apprehension. Mr. X , walking up and down his range of show-rooms, had again come into sight and had paused, lookingin. "We'd get you one, ma'am, I am sure, in two or three days," she repeated. Now it was the customer who did not answer. She began turning over the pile of untrimmed bonnets, while her pale attendant hovered about her, throwing in propitiatory words. Mr. X stood and lodked in from a side doorway. She could see the scowl on his face. At last the customer, finally refusing to take any other in place of the bonnet which she really wanted, departed dissatisfied. The girl began, tremblingly, to put t'ogeth&r the bon­ nets. Tears came to her eyes. She had tried her best to sell and she dreaded the wrath of her master. He had been in a bad temper all day; why, oh why, must this thing have happened just to-day? Mr. X moved away; she saw him go to the cashier's desk in the next room. He came back with a paper and a few shillings*, which he threw down angrily before her. "You'll just sign that if you please, miss." It was an account of the- wages due her. She looked up at him in mute appeal; the angry over-bearing face was answer enough. £>he put her name to the paper and a tear fell on it. "Now, you can just pack up your things and go this minute," said he roughly. "I've no place for a young lady that can't sell a bonnet." She gathered up the money and went meekly. She was a timid girl, with no gifts either for 'complaints or excuses, and for girls of that kind the tyrants of this world have no mercy. She went up-stairs to the bed-room which she shared with two others^ It was bare, elean, depressing; about as homelike as a prison-cell. She looked round it, lialf blinded by her tears, and wrung her hands, murmuring: "What shall I do? Where shall I go?" The room was quite brightly lighted now by the glare of the many lamps in the street. She stood so for a minute, then wiped away her, tears and began packing and arranging her few proper­ ties in her box. When this was done she must go forth into the evening and find herself a shelter for the night and for the morrow. To-morrow would be­ gin again the familiar, heart-breaking search for work, to continue who eould guess how long? And who could tell what character Mr. X would give of her. And she had thirty shillings with which to face the world. Her tears began to fall again as she locked her trunk and rose from her knees. She was glad to hide her face with her veil and to steal away secretly, fearing to meet any one, lest the farewell should break down her courage. So she passed out into the evening and on to Oxford street, the "stony­ hearted step-mother." Mr. X- meanwhile was going home, serene of conscience, to his wife and daughter at Brixton, giving no see- ond thought to the incident of the afternoon. _ It is a story that happens every day; and too often the stones of London, if they could speak, the pavements of Piccadilly, the balustrades of the bridges could tell you how it ends.-- Fall Mall Gazette. Objected to the Outlook. There is a very bright young lady who has somewhat hurt the feeling of a man about town. He has had for some rears the effulgent reputation of a lady- killer, an irresistible. He has been the hero of a good many conquests, and is adcred by the less successful of his kind. He met this young lady, and she seemed to take rather an interest in him. He made up his mind he would marry her. He did not think it neces­ sary to consult her feelings delicately before he asked her. He had found the sex rather weak. One day he opened his heart to her in a frank way. "I'm very tired," he said, "of this bachelor life. I've not been the best5 of men, I suppose, but to tell you the truth, I have been looking all these years for such a woman as you--one 'who could make a home for me, whom I could love and who could keep me away from the restless and unsatisfac­ tory lffe that surrounds me. If you will marry me--" "Thank you--but--I don't think I care to keep a monastery.--San Fran­ cisco Chronicle. • Clerical Confidence. Rev. Caller--Your congregation seems to be very attentive and devout, Mr. Scrimper. Rev. Scrimper--Yes they show it in their contributions. Rev. Caller--Ah, I am glad to hear that they are liberal. Rev. Scrimper--They are not liberal, they are devout. You ought to see the number of religious two-cent pieoes with "In God We Trust" that I take in every Sunday.--Life. Generous. "Can't you stay a little while longer?" asked the criminal as his kind friend was about to laave. - "No, Bob, I haven't time to-day." "Well," said Bob, "take some of mine. I've got ten years more than I want here."--- T.i ft> - V ' • > * J, * J; Modern Mistakes M Grammar. • ; : _ Faults are pardonabltfv in converse Hon, which are not pardonable in writ- " ten composition. But we iinust be care­ ful not to take too much leeway in this regard, and not to make mistakes in • grammar or pronunciation. Some peo­ ple are guilty of grammatical blunders, through sheer carelessness. Thus, a lady of my acquaintance, who under­ stands trigonometry, and can translate Virgil, often says to me "you was," and yet she knows perfectly well that *!"• is an inexcusable mistake. Other people who ought to know bet­ ter, say "he don't" for "he doesn't," "I don't know AS I do," instead or* I don't know THAT I do." "Aint" and "taint" are not often used now by educated people, unless in a jesting way. It is an unwise thing, however, to be careless or inaccurate in one's pronunciations or use of language, since tricks of speech are easily Caught, and very hard to get rid of. Thus, Vhen one is talking to servants, or other uneducated people, one is often tempted to adopt their j>hraseology, in order to be readily un­ derstood by them, but it is better to withstand the temptation, even if one should be obliged in consequence to take more trouble to express one's meaning clearly. What shall be said of the wpman who says: "Idone it?" She has certainly placed herself between the horns of a dilemma. Her hearers will infer, either that her early education was ne­ glected, or that she associated with un­ educated people during her childhood. And yet this is a grammatical fault, which seems hard to get rid of, Per­ sons who never say "I seen it," or "he has went," or "them things," will occa? sionally betray themselves by letting slip the fault, "I done it." r It is quite as incoriect to use "he" and "I" for "him" and "me," or vice versa, as it is to say "I done it," and yet the first-named class of faults--that of using the wrong pronouns--is some­ times committed by educated people. Indeed, I have heard the phrase "it is me" justified, on the ground that it *as a literal translation of the French - 'e'est moi." But our English gram­ mar does not, like its French namesake, justify the employment of certain pro- puncial forms, merely for the value of euphony. "He is older than I" may not Bound so well as "he is older than me," yet the former is the correct form. It is a very common mistake to say "Be­ tween you and I," and yet a moment's reflection should convince anyone who has ever studied grammar, that he should say "Between you and me."-- Florence How Hall, in Ladies' Home Journal. Napoleon as "Father "V iolet." The story of how the violet to be adopted by the followers of Napoleon as his emblem, is quite interesting. Napoleon was walking in the garden of Fontainebleau, in company with the Duke de Bassano and Gen. Bertrand, and meditating whether to make an­ other effort or to submit and go to Elba. A little boy, belonging to one of the gardeners, was plucking some of the violets from abed close by. Napoleon asked the child for them, and the latter gave them up politely. The Emperor then remarked that his best course was to emulate the modest, retiring violet, and amid protestations from his two generals, he carried the violets to his room. The next day he came out into the garden and began to search for violets in the bod where the child had been picking. The sentry remarked that they would be more plentiful next year, and that the Emperor would have less difficulty in finding them. " Why, do you expect me to be here next year?" inquired the astonished Emperor. . This led to u conversation, in which the sentry, Chondieu, informed Na­ poleon that all the soldiers still placed their hopes on him, and the Emperor gave them leave to cherish their hopes. Chondieu told his comrades in the guard-room about it in detail, even to the violets in the Emperor's buttonhole, adding:. "And now, when we speak of him, wo must, dall him Father Violet for safety." > ' As soon as the meaning of his name became known among the Emporor's adherents, they took to wearing or car­ rying yj^olets as his emblem. Wflkie Collins as a Novelist. Wilkie Collins was not, in any sense of the word, a great writer. He has not left one single work that will be living in half a century. He lias not drawn one perfect charac­ ter, nor depicted one great scene. He grovels in mediocrity--pleasant and ex­ citing mediocrity it may be at times, but it is nevertheless mediocrity. His wQrk is purely ephemeral as Trollope's was, as Charles Reade's was, as Stephenson's is, as Haggard's is. His stories are read with interest--they amuse, they please, but they seldom instruct or ele­ vate. (We recognize "Man and Wife" as an exception to this latter stricture, and, possibly one or two others.) At best, his books are read once, and then put aside forever. In a few years they have almost entirely faded from mem­ ory. And yet, in this age of moral degen­ eracy, Wilkie Collins deserves well at the hands of the reading public for the cleanly tone of his writings. His novels are pure fcnd decent. Thev are perfectly free of even any immoral or indelicate tendency. They are unsen- aational and refined, and "anay with safety be read aloud in the strictest family circle. His style lis terse, dra­ matic, vivid, and clear. There is no straining after effect,--no attempt to parade high-sounding phrases and exult in ambiguities. His language is simple, elegant and comprehensive. And so, for this much let us be thankful.-- Alexander N. De Menil, in St, Louts Magazine. , An Unlucky Man. 4? Widow--My husband was ktfjed in a railroad accident, but he had insured himself in an accident company before putting out on his journey ana I got 15,000. „ , Traveling Man's Wife So does my John always insure himself befon3 start­ ing out; btit it's all nonsense I tUl him, tor he never had any luck in his life. LIBERAL Indeed--You are giving yourjson a liberal education,61 under­ stand, Mr. Hparrowgrass," remarked the pastor. "I should just think so, replied Farmer Sparrowgras>"his first year at oollego cost me an even $300. Time. SOMEBODY figures out that 3,000,000 people walk about London streets daily, and'that in so doing they wear away a t^n cf leather particles from their boots and shoes. IN a driving storm one seems capable of holding the rains.--Yonkers Slates* m a n . , - v , '2' j & h , . ' J * 3 g s i WISE AND UNWISE. ^Ghet. GRUBB in Boston--Beans^ * A RECORD is always improved by fee­ ing broken. WHEN the self-made man goes into1: politics he is apt s.to find that official* are machine made. f WIBBME--What is the funniest sight you ever saw? Wabble--A cross-eyed man trying to make a mash. FOND Mother--See the darling drink f Visitor--Yes, indeed, the little cunning How much he resembles his pa. Miss WOULOPE--Pa! I'm engaged." Father Wollope--Yes, and you'd marry* an idiot, I suppose? Miss Wollope---• Well, ma did. Why shouldn't I? BROWN-©Much as we disagree on things in general, Smith, there is one thing, I am sure, that we both stand up for. Smith--Aha! What is it? Browa --To walk. ' SOME of the papers are commenting on the appearance in active life of lady burglars. This is no novelty however. Only a few years ago almost every lad/ you met regularly held up a train. MRS. BROWN--Come here this mo­ ment, Silas! I must punish you for sliding down the banisters. Little Silas--Please, ma, didn't you just telfc me not to make a noise running down stairs? THE President--1 don't feel very well to-day. I must have eaten something that hurt me. Benny--Wasn't it your words, grandpa? I heard a man say you had been eating them ever since election. MRS. GABB--Did you hear about Mm. De Good's husband? He died last = night. Mrs. Gadd-Well! Well! I'll run right over to condole with her, and see if I can't borrow a cup of butter; I'm entirely out. MOORE--Did you save as much money as'you thought you would by spending the summer in the country? Pooro (with a hard, bitter laugh)--Save money! Why, man, my wife has put up sixty jars of preserves! A BARRISTER, fond of parading his erudition, began a speech for the de­ fense with the words: "My lord, it is written in the great book of nature--" when the judge interrupted him with: "Will our learned member tell us on what page ?" "TELL me, George darling," said she, shortly after their marriage. "Do you love me as much as ever?" "Yes, in­ deed." "And do you find anything in the world dearer than your wife?" "Nothing)" said George, "unless it is the house rent." A MINISTER, lately addressing a wo­ man's missionary meeting, said that "thousands of gallons of rum go into Africa for every brother who is sent there;" whereupon one of the sisters whispered to her neighbor: "Rather a large allowance for them missionaries." MISTRESS (from the parlor)--Bridget, the front door bell has rung three times. Why don't you answer it? Bridget (from the kitchen)--Sure, mum, if Oi opened it the furst ring, paple wud say Oi'did nothing but tind the dure, an' Oi wudn't have any wan think me that lazy. MRS. POTTS--When I was first mar­ ried I thought it was solely for love that John had sought my hand, but 1 know better now. I am firmly convinced it was my money he was after. Miss Spyte--Well, it must be considerable satisfaction to you to know that he is not such a fool as you thought he was. BRIOOS--I have been hunting all the morning for a friend of mine, Boggs. but I can't find him. I wish he wasn't so much trouble to get hold of , when I want him. Boggs--I'll tell you what to do. The next time you see\him, Briggs, borrow $10 or $15. After that you can't walk the streets without run­ ning over him. "Do YOU think," Herbert asked in a low, tremulous voice, "that you oould learn to love me?" For some time there was no sound except the long sighing of the trees. "I am waiting for your answer," he said gravely. "Well, Herbert," she said hesitatingly, "when I went to school I was always looked upon as quick to learn almost any­ thing." PARSON--You are a total abstainer, I believe, Mr. Skinflint ? Mr. Skinflint-- Yes, sir, I be. I never tasted liquor but once, and that was to the County Fair, twenty-three years ag~. Hez Hawbuck treated me three times that day, and I got jest dizzy enough to let some scamp pass a lead nickel on me. When I found that out I sez to myself, "You've had enough, an' I ain't tetched a drop sence, nor I ain't goin' ter. A Bull Run Incident. While Gen. Beckwith was on duty in Washington as commissary the battle of Bull Run was fought. Among the hundreds of war correspondents then located in and hovering about Washing­ ton was the editor-in-chief of a Chicago daily paper--a man who ^ has since achieved national reputation. The journalist was very anxious to go to the front, but the means of conveyance wcr© SCHW56. In his extremity tlx© Clii- cago editor applied to Capt. Beckwith for a horse, and was furnished with a splendid and very valuable animal, on which he rode down to the vicinity of the battle. When the raw Union troops were routed the editor fancied his pre­ cious hide was a trophy of particular value to Beauregard's victorious troops, and he made a desperate ride of it back to Washington. His fright did not end with his arrival under the shadow of the Capitol, for he thrust Capt. Veok- worth'fe jaded steed into the first livery stable he came to, and it was months before the owner found it, and then discovered it by the merest chance. Meanwhile the great editor had scur­ ried back to his desk, whence he fought the rebels gallantly and safely for the ensuing four years.--St. Louis Globe- Democrat • Poem Handed in by Slag Nine. • When I think of the tnvel, the old- fashioned towel, that used to hang up by the printing house door, I think | that nobody in those days of shoddy can hammer out iron to wear as it wore. The tramp who abused it, the [devil who used it, the comp who got at it when those two were gone,the make-up, and foreman, the editor, poor man, each rubbed some grime off while they rubbed a heap on. In, over and under, 'twas blacker than thunder, 'twas harder than poverty, rougher than sin; from the roller suspended, it never was bended, and it flapped on the wall like a banner of tin. It grew thicker and rougher, and harder and tougher, and daily put on a more inkier hue, until one windy morning, without any warn­ ing, it fell to the floor and was broken in two. ^ » . TRIP--I hate this restaurant It is always so crowded. Snip--Yes; it is a regular trough. Proprietor -- Make yourselves «aite at home, gentlemen. " ^ - v • , " . > . •• " • ! - ' *•* ' -** " 4|i a' yj.Ulc 1 fe4j_ ?n ,"; V| >1 ';V! i