£**,*• l 7 ] .w^** vfeyj? flPobacco Caiuerl Consumption-Noto- t ^ bto Carm tbc Totoaceo <«Wt and • ' ' Cftunttiplivc Get« #c3|. Two Bivaan* Wis., Fek 2.--(Spe- clal.]--Great excitement and interest has been manifested in the recovery of an old-time resident of this town, Mr. Jos. Bunker, who has for several years been considered by all his friends a hopeless consumptive. Investigation shows that for over thirty-two years he used three and a half pounds of tobacco ft v»eek. A short time ago lie «•»•» in duced to try a tobacoo-lmuit cure caiied "No-To-Bac." Talking about his miraculous recovery to-dav he said: "Yes, I used No-To-Bae, and two baxes completely cured me. I thought, and •o did all my friend-*, that I had con sumption. Now they say, as you say, "how healthy and strong you look, JToe,' and whenever thev ask me what eured my conrumption, I tell them No- To-Bac. The last week I used tobacco I lost four pounds. The morning I be- Sn the use of No-To-Bac I weighed f± pounds; to-day I weigh 169, a gain Of 41i pounds. I e$t heartily and sleep well Before I used No-To-Bac I wag •O nervous that when I went to drink I had to held the glass in both hands. To-day my nerves are perfectly steady. Where did I get No-Tc-Bac? At the drug store. It is made by the Sterling Remedy Company, general Western office 4;> Randolph St., Chicago, bat I •ee by the printed matter that it is sold by all druggists--I know all the druggists in this town keep it. I have recommended it to over one hundred people and do not know of a single iailure to cure." i jCAPT. JAMES L. RISK, of the Malloij One steamship City of San Antonio, is ft true son of the sea. He was born on board the Baltimore Clipper bark Ljghtfoot, which at the time of his birth was in the harbor of Nagasaki, Japan. His father was in command of the Light foot. Capt. Risk's Daniel is also a shipmaster. STATX OF OHIO, CITY OF TOLEDO, \ " '»ISV:*' "" Luc AH COUNTY. ) *FBANK J. CHE NBY makes oath that he la the tutor partner of the firm of F. 3. CHKNEY & Co., inR business in the City of Toledo, County •ad State aforesaid, and that said firm will f*»y tile Bum of ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS for each and every case of Catarrh that cannot be cured by the use of HALI/S CATARRH CUBE. * * JFliANK J. CHENEY. : Sworn to before me and subscribed in my presence, this Ith day of December, A. D. 188& l' -- , A. W. GLEASON, I SEAL. Notary Public. jHall'B Catarrh Cure is taken internally and jgtte directly upon the blood and mucous sur- ::ttoea of the system. Send for teitimonlala. free. It F. J. CHENEY Se CO., Toledo, a J^Bold by Druggists, 75 cents. •m- ARIUS, the great heretic, delighted I religious dances, and would dance II exhausted. ST. TITUS'S DANCE, flpasui*. Convulsions, Dizziness, Fainting Spells, 1 fervous Prostration and those nerv ous conditions brought on by functional dis orders ai'epermaiienfcly cured by Dr. Pierce's i Favorite Prescription. It's a strengthening j nervine and restorative tonic, prescribed by eminent Physician for all those distress^ 1 weaknesses *' and irregular tios common women. Mrs. ADAM BERK, Albany, Berks Co., Pa., writes: " DR. R. V. PIERCE: Dear Sir-- My sister. Miss Cor delia Merkel, had St. Vitus's Dance. Her head and right arm moved or twitched constantly; she could not walk without be ing held under her arms. She tried four doctors, but without good. After fifteen months, having been Riven up as a hopeless invalid, I bought her Dr. Pierce's Favorite Prescription; in two 'ell and strong." Guaran tee* a T s?or . *•-, Miss MERKEL ps i • # PHB5- J KNOWLEDGE Brings comfort and improvement and LIDS to personal enjoyment WHEN ightly usea. The many, who live bet- r than others and enjoy life more, with ess expenditure, by more promptly dapting the world's best products to he'neeus of physical being, will attest he value to health of the pure liquid axative principles embraced in the medy, Syrup of Figs. ,, '0 Its excellence is due to its presenting --•'"In the form most acceptable and pleas- . -#nt to the taste , the refreshing and truly ;.;;;~5LL>eneficial properties of a perfect LAX ATIVE ; effectually cleansing the system, • dispelling colds, headaches and fevers permanently curing constipation. '•JT has given satisfaction to millions and . fnet with the approval of the medical • profession, because it acts on the Kid- leys, Liver and Bowels without we.uk- ning them and it is perfectly free from very objectionable substance. Syrup of Figs is for sale by all drug- ists in 50c and $1 bottles, but it is man- factured by the California Fig Syrup Jo. only, whose name is printed on every %ackage, also the name, Syrup of Figs, and being well informed,jrou will not accept any substitute if offered. WBfC >-f < r . e Greatest Medical Discovery ^ of the Age. KENNEDY'S DISCOVERY. MNALO KENNEDY, OF ROXBURY, MASS., •' Has discovered In one of our common Cisture weeds a remedy that cures every ind of Humor, from the worst Scrofula v gown to a common Pimple. . H e h a s t r i e d i t i n o v e r e l e v e n h u n d r e d w Cases, and never failed except in two cases V;4 fboth thunder humor). He has now in his possession over two hundred certificates / y of its value, all within twenty miles of • Jtoston. Send postal card for book. :|1 A benefit is always experienced from ,,** #ie first bottle, and a perfect cure is war- Canted when the right quantity is taken & • *%. w The Fatal Valentine. Bpe*k MI to me ot valmttaM. Nor of the coming of tike dar When every Tom Mods one to £oe Aadi ever/ Jack sends one to The d*jr to me is one of gloomw f- •Tts one of solemn retrospects? " ' " /i,: Were I to celebrate a day. • This is the last I should select :'i* For on this day some ten years b»ck--» i How hath the thought upon me prtyill^ I bought a gorgeous valentine And sent H lo a f«»tive maid. ~ A ralentine of lustrous hue, ' A11 green and gold to charm the eye] And thus it read: "Sweet maid, be mfaie! Be mine, or I shall surely di®J« Oh. sad, funereal, dismal day On which I sent that valent v That maiden took me at my word. And ever since she has been ulna --Boston Courier. v ^ ; STRANGE VALENTINES When the lungs are affected it causes ting pains, like needles passing rough them; the same with the Liver or owels. This is caused by the ducts being Stopped, and always disappears in a week After taking it. Read the label. If the stomach is foul or bilious It will {ause squeamish feelings at first, ' No change of diet ever necessary. Eat e best you can get, and enough of it. ose, one tablespoonfuljn water at bed- lime. Sold by all Druggists. No. «-9« For the Million. Tor Woentswewill send yon, pootpaid. a book containing " ~ popular (tonga,words and manic :;»a NEVER received a valentine in my life, although I've had my share of sweethearts." " How strange, Ruth, although I think the sending of these love-lorn missives is becom ing obs >lete with the passing years" replied my visi tor, Lucy Chiches ter. Lucy and I, Ruth Davi«, "bad been inseparable from childhood, with very few of the childish quarrels which so often arise. Neither of us had been blessed with brothers or sisters, and loving each other as we did, we scarcely missed them. Lucy*E father was a prominent judge in the town of N , or perhaps I should say city, which is our home, a place of some forty thou sand souls. My father was a well-to-do merchant: not wealthy, but with enough so that We need not count the pennies to make one dollar do the work of five. Lucy was far more beautiful than I; a perfect blonde, with hair like yellow corn-silk and eyes like bluebells. A bit of a coquette she was, too, like the birds which plume themselves and sing to charm the listeners. I was dark, with hair black and straight as an Indian's, my one cross being that I could not coax il to stay in the ringlets which on Lucy's head were like a maze to entangle unsus pecting hearts. Mv heavy brows vied with my hair in darkness, shading eves which were misty and dreamy. But enough of self; just imagine me like hundreds of young women you meet each day. On this day in February set aside to the good St. Valentine, Lucy ha I oome over early to show me the tokens of devotion showered upon her by her dozen or more devoted swains. "Valentines do not seem to have be* come obsolete in your case," I re marked, leisurely gazing at the per fumed satin devices. "Which one is from Ben?" A blush crept over neck, oheek and brow as Lucy answered, "None of them." "Probably his will come later," I answered, carelessly. "No, Ruth." A sob trembled on the fair lips, then Lucy burst into a pas sion of tears. "What has come between Ben Marlowe?" I queried, ttro! yellow hair sympathetically. "His mother." "His mother!" I exclaimed in sur- pou and cing the prise. JLucy." No, "You are surely dreaming, I'm not. She's a selfish old thing! I heard that she said that-- that I was a flirt, not fit to be the wife of a good man. I hate her! yes, hate her!" cried Lucy, springing abruptly to her feet, scattering her valentines over the floor, the tears dried by the fire of anger burning in her eyes. "I would not marry Ben Marlowe now, were he to get down on his knees and impore me to do so; although there IS not much danger of his doing that if his mother can prevent it." "You wrong tiie woman, I " •There, I will not listen to your apol ogies for her. Ben came to me last night and told me that he was going away with his mother for at least a year, and he thought, under present circumstances, his mother's health be ing so delicate, we had bast not name our wedding day until his return." "And you " "I gave him back his betrothal ring and told him it would be wisest not to name it at all." "Lucy!" "Yes; I knew you would L E shocked, but I must be ftrat, or not at all." "You forget, Lucy, that it is his mother for whom he makes the sacri fice." "Indeed I do not. No mother shall come between me and my lover. I pre-' Bume, under the circumstances, it is well he is going. A man is a fool to ask a girl to fnarry him when he is so willing to give her up for an old wom an's fancy. Well, he's not the only man in the world, as these baubles bear witness." As I looked in amazement at the fair girl, there stood out before me the selfishness to which for so many years I had been blind. I SA^F again the days of childhood passing in review, when it was always I who had to give up toys and pleasures to suit the whims of my pretty playmate, or else she would leave me lor companions who would obey her slightest wish; and when we had grown older, she monopolized ALL the young men with whom we associ ated and was very jealous of my friend ships with other girls. I had always humored her as if she were a spoiled child; for she was beau tiful, vivacious, and careless, a verita ble butterfly in life'.-T garden. And Ben Marlowe--the brave young frie nd, who always gave a helping hand to those in need, whether rich or poor, old or young, it mattered not. I saw again the picture of the sweet-faced in valid mother, and a strange feeling swept over me, thrilling every nerve with its sudden intensity, causing me to tremble and grow pale. To think my friend, almost sister, had spurned this man, the gift of the loyal love which I would give my life to cl#iim. Oh, to be alone to think and fight this battle with self. "Lucy," I cried, my voice sharp with repressed agony, "you are cruel and heartless." "Yes. I have one heart less, that's sure, and to be so bereft on St. Valen tine's day of all days," she replied with a light laugh, her anger and loss half forgotten as she reseated herself and once more took up her scattered tro phies, too deeply engrossed to notice the strange ring in my voice. "The worst of it is, Ruthie," she continued, "that all my friends knew we were to be married soon. You see it is a little humiliating to tell them we've agreed to disagree. Ah, me! what is love? a . . An odd compound of simples most sweet. Called In life's spring by Fancy, poor mor tals to cheat. Oh, see what an elegant remembrance," and Lucy held up a long satin ribbon with some pretty nonsense printed thereon, to which was attached to two silver Hearts bound together with a diamond-tipped arrow. "Why, Ruth, it's a brooch," she exclaimed enthusi astically. "Who could have seat it? Ah, here's a tiny n-. IN tucked in the loop* of the ribbon. Theo Van Bpps! Well, he is a valentine worth "having. I feel quite flattered, tor I never could make the least impression on bis high- mightiness; he has been quite unap proachable." "Quite idiotic, you mean, MID so soft that an impression hasn't a chance to leave an imprint." "Ruth Davis, I believe you are jeal ous!" "You can disabuse your mind of that idefr at once." "Let me finish the note. He says: 'If I may call, wear this gift as you go for your afternoon walK.' Why of course he may call; why not? Ruth, there comes a messenger boy up toe steps, carrying a white box. I verily believe you are going TD receive a val entine. Do hurry and answer the ring. I am wild with anxiety." I arose, still trembling with the storm of emotion that had swept over me, and answered the bell. Yes, the box was for me; but it could not be a valentine. Lucy was by my side, as, with hands that would show my nerv ousness despite me, I untied the bo*. •It must be immense; judging by its size he could not find sufficient roetn to express his emotions," laughed Lucy. Lifting the -cover, I removed the soft paper wrappings, disclosing what appeared to be a book, bc.uud in mother-of-pearl. "Humph: looks more like a prayer- book than a valentine," continued my companion, creeping closer to my side. I lifted the beautiful thing from its resting-place and opened it. For one brief moment life seemed to float away into darkness. With a strong effort I shook oil' the deadly faintness almost overpowering me and looked once more. On each inner side of the handsome cover was painted on ivory the pictures of Ben Marlowe and his dear old moth- ERT- so life-like they were, it appeared as if their lips were half parted to speak to me. I forgot Lucy and all else as I gazed fascinated upon those two faces. The mother with her crown of 6nowy hair, her kindly face with the lines of patient suffering. Ben re sembling his mother, except hi* feat ures were more massive, more grand, because of their masculinity. When I opened the case, a note had fallen to the floor. Lucy had picked it up, and was now holding it in her hand. As I looked up she gavo it to me with out a word. I unfolded the paper and real: DEAR OLD FRIEND AND COMRADE: I had these pictures painted, intending to give them to Lucy on St. Valentine's day; but as she will not cure for thorn now, owing to events she has probably explained to you, I ask you to accept them, because I know you love my dear old mother. You know how she stood over me night and day when I was stricken with fever, sacrificing her own life for me. Yes, Ruth, it is a sad truth which almost breaks my heart; the doctors say that dur ing that time of faithful watching she ex hausted her own strength and can never recover. They tell me that at longest she can be spared to me only a year. A year! Oh, I would gladly give ten. twenty, aye. forty years of my own life if only she might live. I think I never understood Lucy. Ah, well, 1 will not reptneb God srant that she will be hap >y with some one more worthy than I; with some one who has no invalid mother to st and between them. I cannot come to say farewell; we are starting hastily; but I shall bear with me pleasant memories of the unselfish little playmate of my youth and the friend ot later day a Sincerely yours. BEN MARLOWE. I handed the note to Lucy, watching her furtively as she read it. Would she regret her selfish unkindness? No, it was not remorse that crimsoned HE" cheek. Tossing the letter into my lap she gave vent to such words of bit- «I HATE BER!» SAID LUCT. * " n 1! *£< A,... : terness as I never hope to hear again. Then with a malicious laugh she gath ered up her valentines and threw her scarf over her head. "111 leave you staring at that precious pair of idiots, Ruth," she said sneer- ingly. "I'm sure, whatever I should have done with. Ben's picture, I should have scratched the eyes out of the old cat's face." "Lucy!" I cried, angered beyond en durance, "you forget that 1 have al ways loved Mrs. Marlowe." "Her son, too, perhaps," she retorted. "You are cruel and unjust, Lucy. That was a tale of idle gossips which reached your ears, whispering that Mrs. Marlowe had spoken unkindly o*f you . She i s too goad to speak thus o f any one, much less of the girl her son loved. I know it was her wish that he should marry you and bring you to the home she so soon must leave for that other home in the great beyond. But when the doctor toid Ben that change of scene and climate was all that could prolong her life another year, he thought not of his own happiness. You were both young and could wait, and he could devote that one year en tirely to his mother. "Well, I certainly never would have gone to live in her house, to be ordered around by her and catsr to her whims," replied Lucy, as she stocd with her hand on the door. "You will not have an opportunity now, *" I answered coldly. "I haven't time to listen to a sermon, as it is growing iate. I must dress for a oromenade and don my new brooch." * * # * # * * Two years passed away. Lucy and I were never quite the same after that eventful St. Valentine's day. There seemed to be always the shadow of it lying between us. I was not surprised, when, a few months after B3N Marlowe'6 departure, she showed me a ̂ uperb diamond ring and told me she was be rothed to Theo Van Epps. The young man was half imbecile, but immensely wealthy. Tho glitter of gold blinded her eyes to all defects. On the next St. Valentine's day I received a paper from Europe containing a notice of Mrs. Marlowe's death and her burial near the English home of her ancestors. On that same day there was a brilliant weddinfr at •'fe Judge Chichester's. I was maid of honor, or rather, I took part in the Bale of • soul for gold. The third anniversary of St. Valen tine's, I called upon Mrs. Van Epps, who had just returned from abroad. "I am glad to see you, Ruth. It seems ages since we mst," she re marked, as she sank languidly into an easy chair. "I am rather fatigued after my journey, or I would ask you to remain for the day. Can you not favor me with a day before I am once mdfce in the whirl of soe'ety. Theo is so fond of gayety. This is St. Valentine's day, isn't it? Have you received any valentines since the day when Ben sent you thai horrid old woman's pic ture?" "Of whom are you speaking?" I asked, hot anger leaping in my heart. "No offense intended, Ruth. We met Ben in Europe just after he had buried his mother, so he was not inclined to enter society. He looked pale and care worn, not half as handsome as he used to be. We heard a bit of gossip about him while in London. People who were his friends said he was in love with the daughter of a barrister, so I presume he will not return until he brings a bride to the old home. It looks quite shabby, don't you think?" "Almost any place would show lack of care when the master had been so long absent." "Too bad he was not married before his mother's death." "Yes. A storm is arising, and I must hasten." "Let me send you home in a car riage?" > .. ' • "No, thank you, Lucy, $ prefer to walk.*. •R-JPF . "Do not forget to come for the day soon. I want you and The A to meet. How I reached the street I never knew. The storm was now raging furi ously; the sleet cut my face like needle points and blew around me in blinding waves. Drawing my furs close around my neck and ears, I hastened on as best I could through the blizzard. Then all at once I stopped confused. The streets were deserted; already great drifts were piled knee deep at the corners. Was I lost, and home so close, and Ben--oh, well, what mat tered it? Why should I think of him whom I had loved so long in vain? I murmured, as I stood hopelessly in the dristing snow. I would go to sleep here in this soft, downy bed, and he would never know how I worshiped him next to my God. He is married now. Mar ried. and I cannot think of him and love him any more without sin, for he is another's. Ben, Ben, my soul reaches out through the darkness, pleading that just once more, ere the night of death, I may see thy face. "Ruth!" "Heaven! at last I hear his voice, feel the strong arms around me." With a sigh of perfect joy I sank into unconsciousness. Long hotirs afterward I opened my eves and looked around me in surprise. Had I only been dreaming after all? Mother and fataer sat beide me, where I lay on the couch. The gas was lighted and a oheery fire sparkled in the grate. "Are you better, daughter?" asked my father, as he stroked my head fondly. "Better!" I exclaimed in astonish ment. "Why, what has been the mat ter? I was just taking a nap after my tiresome walk through the snow. I never saw such a bewildering storm."^ "It has been very severs, my dar ling." mother replied AS she took my hand in hers, "and had it not been for Ben Marlowe, you would have frozen to death." "Ben Marlowe," I exclaimed, inter rupting her hastily as I raise 1 myself on my elbow. "Yes, Ruth," answered father, "he came soon after you left. He said he thought he would bring himself home for a valentine, and see if you would BJ, pleased. When the storm increased in fury and you did not return, wo be came greatly alarmed, fearing Lucy in her selfish thoughtlessness had allowed you to walk home instead of lending you in the carriage. We became so anxious that Ben could not remain in the house, so he started out to meet you. Thank God that he did, for he found you lying unonscious in a drift. Lifting you'in his arms he brought you home. You were only a blcck away, but I suppose you became bewildered." "And his wife, whore is she?" I asked choking back a sob. "His wife!" exclaimed mother, look ing at me anxiously. "You had better lie down now, dearie, and keep quiet; I fear the shock of your exposure has been too much for you." "But Lucy said he was bringing a bride to the old home," I answered, confusedly. "Lucy was-right for once," replied a rich, strong voice from the shadows back of me; "that is, if my little valen tine whom I rescued from the snow drift will give me as favorable an an swer as her parents have done, and co with me to make sunshine in t JE so long darkened home." Father and mother remembered some unanswered letters awaiting them in the library, which required their immediate attention, so only Ben heard my answer. The fifth St. Valentine's anniversary finds me happy in the home where, for nearly two years, Ben and I have lived for each other and the good WJ could do to those lesi blessed. Lucy's valentine to-day was a bill of divorce from her husband, granting her half his fortune; mine was a bhu-- eyed baby boy, a miniature counter part of his father, and we have named him Valentino Marlowe.--Yankee Blade. History of St. Valentine. St. Valentine was an Italian priest who suffered martyrdom at Rome in 270. or at Terni in 30 I, writes Florence Wilson in the Ladies' Home Journal. Historians differ AS to the date. Le gend amplifies, by dwelling on the virtues of his life and the manner of his death, ani tells how he was brought before the Emperor Claudius II., WHO asked why he did not cultivate his friendship byhonorin? his gods. As Valentine pleaded tr.e caus ^ ot the one true God earnestly, Calphurnius, the priest, criecLout that he was seducing the Emperor, whereupon he was sent to Asterius to be judged. To him Valentine spoke of Christ, theilight of the world, and Asterius said: "If He be the light of the world, HA will restore the light to my daughter, who has been blind for two yearsThe maiden was brought, and after Valentine prayed and layed hands on her she received her sight. Then Asterius asked that he and his household might be bap tised. whereat the Emperor being en raged, caused all to be imprisoned, and Valentine to be beatan with clubs. He was beheaded a year later at Rome on February 1J, 2"0. History, having little to tell ecn- carning the man, makes amends by dwelling at length on the ceremonies observed on this day. They trace the origin of these to the Roman Luper- CAL% celebrated in February, at which one practice was to put the names of women in a box to De drawn by the men, each being bound to serve and honor the woman whoie name he had drawn. r r- COAL is dearest in Africa; cheapest in China. Highest of ali ia Leavening Power.---Lateat U. S. Gov't Report, AB5QUJTE1Y PURE How a Butler Fought an Earl. A man who helped to make a curious diplomatic episode in the days of Louis Philippe's reign died recently in Pass}*, a suburb of Paris. He was known among his neighbars simply as Francois, and for half a century or more he had lived at leisure on the profits accruing to him lrom a duel which he had fought in his youth with the father of the present Earl of Rob bery. Francois had resigned his place as a non-commissioned officer iu the French cavalry to assume the mare lucrative duties of butler in the house of a con spicuous French statesman. One day Lord Kosebery came to see his master about the BUSINGS of the British Government. Francois, de clared that he could not deliver Lord Rosebery's card to his master, who was then engaged, and advised Lord Rote be ry whom he did not recognize, to secure a letter granting an audience and return latar. This was too much for the English statesman, and, thrusting his card into Francois's hand, he commanded him angrily to deliver it at once. Francois, after starting away with the card, stopped to read the name on it. Lord Ro.-ebery reproved h m so sharply that Francois replied impudently. An exchange of angry words followed, and the master cf the house came to the reception-room to learn the cause of the disturbance. Francois was dis charged at once. On the next day Lord Rosebery received this note: "SIR: Yesterday I was a servant; to day I am a free man. I no longer allow your insults to pass. As a former officer in the cavalry of the French army I demand satisfaction." Lord Rosebery accepted the chal lenge, and two shots were exchanged without in,ury to anybody concerned. Francois WAS satisfied; but Lord Rose bery was nettled at the thought that his antagonist might at any time lay aside the dignity of a retiied officer to become a butler again, and thus expose him to the reproach of having fought with a servant. He therefore gave Francois an an nuity of £2">0, on the condition of his abstaining from domestic service in the future, and thus preserving his personality as a retired man of honor. Francois fulfilled his part of the agree ment AS faithfully as did Lord Rose bery, and never worked afterward--at least that is what is affiimed by the French newpapers, which have in corporated this story in their obituary notices, of the butler of honor. Tariff and Taxation. Tariff duties and Internal revenue taxa tion on Incomes and corporations are ex citing public interest, but of quite as much Interest are those things whfch tax the system and require at once an external remedy. On this subject, with special recommendation, Mr. Pierce fx Brown, Brldgewater, Mass.. says: "In accidents from all kinds of athletic sports, to reduce sprains and bruises, I have used St Jacobs Oil and always found it most reliable " Also, Mr. CI B. Sands, Marftum, Okla., writes: «I have used St. Jacobs Oil for sprains and rheumatism and would not be without it for anything." Mr. R. Ledbat- (tor, Denton, Texas, says: M1 have used fit Jacobs Oil and it is the only thing I ever Saw that would cure toothache in ten min utes' time," and it is usually prompt aud sure for frost-bites. All of these commu nications are of recent date, showlog un abated Interest Frightful Phonetics. An extraordinary story of the danger of phonetic spelling is told by an Australian paper. A Scandinavian named Ole Baumgartz, who is estab lished in Australia as a school-master, was astonished and outraged one day by the receipt of the following missive: "Old Boom guts, is queer. Cur, ass, you ar a man of no legs, I wish to enter my bowie in your skull." A conference WAS held, and the writer, a new-comer, was visited by a body of inhabitants and asked indignantly to read his letter aloud, and say what he meant by it. He read: "Ole Baumgartz, Esq. Sir: As you are a man of knowledge, I wish to enter my boy in your school." 842.50 FOR A FARM WA«OX. The best wagon in the world can be had for $12.5D: a barrel cant for $3.S0. If Von Will Cut. This Out '«nd *«MM1 It Wit'I 5c to the John A. Salzar Seed Co., La Crosse, Wis,, you will receive their mammoth catalogue, where you >;an read about this wagon. C THE policy of protecting the deer in Maine by a rigorous close season has not only resulted in an increase of tho deer, but also in an unexpected return of the wolves to their old haunts. AS A SIMPLE YKT EFFECTIVE REME DY for Throat Affections, BKOWN'S BRON CHIAL TROCHES stand first in public favor. They are absolutely unrivalled for the alleviation of all Throat irritations caused by Cold or use of the voice. CARNELIAN is greatly improved by exposure to the sun and then heatipg in earthen pots. BBKCHAM'S PILLS have a pleasant coat ing. disguising the taste of the pill with out impairing It + efficacy. 25 cents a box. ENGLISHMEN are said to have $500,- 000,000 in our railroads. FOR weak and inflamed eyes use Da Isaac Thompson's Eye-water. It is a care fully prepared physician's prescription. THE deepest coal mine is in Belgium, 4,542 FEE£ £•• "Colchester" Spading Boot ad. 1* other column. Good Qualities Possessed by Hood's Sarsaparilla are almost beyond mention. Best of all, It purifies the blood, thus strengthening the nerves, it regu lates the digestive organs, invigo rates the kidneys and liver, tones sad builds up the entire syatem, cores Scrofula, Dyspepsia, Catarrh, Rheumatism. Its career of une- qualed success proves beyond a question that Hood's5#*'Cures Hitwd'S Pillseure all Liver Ills, Sick Head ache, Jaundice, Indigestion Try a box. 25c. f Don't moop! Don't get old before your time! Beat, stroiijt-J>LJ RAT and iwienti&cally most perfect SHOULDER BRACK sent postpaid for at. iddress LYONS, Box 1144, New Haves, Cons. The Bill for a.Dinner. One often hears something* funny by simply keeping one's ears open. A day or two ago I overheard a well-known Union Club chappie ordering a dinner at Del'S for quite a large party. He was most careful about getting every thing just right, but the most circum spect thing of all that he ordered was ti>e whispered admonition to the head waiter: "And be sure to see that the bill is not brought to the table after dinner." This was surely a groat piece of consideration, not only for himself bui for his guests. There is always AN awkward pause at every dinner given in a public restaurant when the bill is presented. Tho guests ull try to look as if they hadu't eaten anything at all, while the host, as he runs his eye down the long list of items, wonders how they could have eaten so much.--New York Recorder. • • When War Is Declared Against a man's happiness by his stomach, the enemy may be pacified and bronzht speedily and easily to terms. That potent regulator of digestion, Hostetter's Stomach Bitters, disciplines the rebellions organ thoroughly. Indigestion arises from weak ness of the stomach, and the food in it, for want ot the power to digest, decomposes and acidifies, giving rise to heartburn, flatnlence and pain, besides a Imultitude of symptoms both changeful and perplexing. Bn^--peace soon reigns when the great stomachic is re sorted to and used with persistence. Dys pepsia gives rise to morbid discomposure of mind, and even sleeplessness and hvpo- chondria in chronic cases. To the complete dismissal ot these the Bitters is fully adequate. Liver complaint, constipation, debility, rheu matism and malaria are completely subdued by this genial medicine. TbSSSX. IK FIT, « BESriS WX&SCf# QUALITY. The outer or extend* thswfeei* d-wn tothakeel, prater* inc the two* ln dicgi ana In otter haul tfi ASK YOUR FOB and don't l" rr-riOME. Colchest4* Causing Betrothed ̂ Jer»ble Annoyaitee. MW . -J, AN(* A YOTM? woman • Rill ulllfrom New Brunswick on Scott's 'we maxM here, Etoulsion, because! fat foods make fat children. They are thin, and regain thin just la proportion to their inability il* assimilate food rich in fat. Scotfs Emolsion of Cod Liver Oil is especially adaptable to those of weak diges* tion--it is partly digested already. Astonishing how quickly a tfiili person gains solid flesh by its use! Almost as palatable as milk. Ptvpirad by Seott BOVM, N. Y. Aft I m Miss E. PAULIXE .JOHNSON, daugh ter of a Mohawl? chief, is one of the big list of Massachusetts poets. At tired in a red woolen, sleeveless short dress, over which was'A fringed tunic of buckskin, erihamented with ermine tails and coloreq beads, and with bear claws and panther teeth for bracelet? and necklace, she recited several of her own poems at a meeting held in Boston the other night. $4 to California. Th^ is our sleeping car rate on the Phil lips-Rock Island Tourist Excursions from Chicago to Los Angeles or San Francisco, via the scenic route and Ogden You can go with Phillips, tho best of all excursion managers, for ho hai each party accom panied by a spocial agent who goes the en tire trip with patrona These personally conducted excursions leave Chicago twice a week, Tuesday and Thursday. We have, also a flatly tourist car service, via our Southern route, through the beau tiful Indian Territory and Fort Worth to Los Angeles and San Francis.^ "thetour ist car r:ite via this route, the same. Ap ply at Rock Island ticket otHce, 104 Clark streets John Sebastian. G. P. A., G. K. L fc P. By., Chicago WALTER BAKER & CO. COCOA and CHOCOLATE Highest Awards (Xcdtlaaad World'* Oa ew folic wire namely: RE1KP1ST C9C0.1, PKEIIU1 Ho. 1 CM GERM 8WE3T CB0C91 VASdLA CHOCMJTE, €9CtI BUTTER, For •• parity of magBriltjJ' •• eicclleni fluTor." ana *t» form even composition."* „ i „ i , L '• •OLD BY GROCERS inruvwMnia. •ALTER BAKER & 00., QQBCHESTEK. HAS! W. Ii. DOUOtAS S3 SHOK 'equals custom work, costing foot $4 to $6, best value for the maker in the world. Name and pHe» stamped on the bottom. Every lir warranted. Take no substi tute. See local papers for full UWITirit. description of our complete f°r ladies and gca. X^Wllemen or send for Ii- W'i'lXHl®4rSr:-r)?\ lust rated Caialtgm* giving ia. structioas how to or der bv malt. Postage free. You can get the bat bartr-iins of dealers who [n.sli our shoes. •1 ^EHDDF^ fWECT, \t •m THOMPSON CHANDLER, a farmer of Lyons, N. Y., is the father of two eons. One of them is 8 years old and the other, a prosperous business man in Vineland, N. J., is (10. The latter has a son 40 years old, who is a bank di rector. . DON'T ALLOW YOCBS«LF to trifle with a Cold, and so encouru;e the development of some latent Pulmonary and Bronchial disease, which often ends fatally. You had better cure your Coush or Cold by promptly resorting to Dr. D. Jayno'a Ex pectorant, ' an old-time remedy fof all Coughs, Lung and Throat affections. THE Greeks consume annually to each inhabitant five pounds of sugar and one pound of coffee. They make up the deficiency in wine, drinking eighteen gallons each in the twelve months. J'HK BHKATH ot • chronic catarrh patient is often t-o offensive that be becomes an object of divgnst. Alter a tinio ulceration sets in.the^pongv l>o a en are attacked, and rrequentlv destroyed. A constant Kource oi discomfort In the dripping of the purulent secretions into the throat, sometimes producing inveterate bronchitis, which is usua ly the exciting cause of pulmonary disease. The brilliant result* by its use for years past properly designate Ely's Ctjeam Balm as by far the best and only euro. Lovely warmth of color, with traces of pink anu white, is the exquisite complexion which fol lows tlie use ot Glenn's Sulphur Soap. Shiloh's Consumption Cure is sold on a guar antee. It cures Incipient Consumption. It U ths best Cough Cure. 25 cents, so ceuta and tiXO. FITS.--All Fits stopped tree by I>r. Kline's U' • <t Nerve Kestoier. No Kits after first day V nse. Mar- velous cure*. Treatise and tS.OO trial bottle tree to Fit cases, bend to Dr. Kline, <JUI Arch St.. l'liila. Pa Ely's Cream Bain W1UU CUBE CATARRH | Prico BO Centa. | . APPIT Balm Into each noabtt. BLYBKOS., 56 Warren 8UN.Y. SPECULATION oa llnt> •20. tr i. ftAC RS°S£S^3oT Vn 111 #*1 Send for our Cwooi^a. KiaMBrieie&CO. Dealers in Stocks, Grain and Provisions. 413First Na tional Bank Bldg., 194 Dearborn St* Chicago. NQXALl INCUBATOR W« manafftttvr* •itfecr tiiif k ot doable tnjr. WIU I , ogptaMnn Incusatsr on the market, and we manu facture the only seif-rogvlat* ing Brooder in America. Circulars free. Addmm G£0. Ir. MURPHY A CO, 4CIHCT. ILL. Bax JL PRETTIEST BOOK COCC K V E K P U I . H T K D . r K B B .Cheap M dirt hyoa. aad lb. SEED OneCeatapka. UP, If rak CWif, p«r«, (Mat. 1,000.000 Beautiful Ilhutratad Oatalagae free. U. II. aUKMWAY. B--kfcr*. ~ fiOEHTS MAKE S5i Biy U tens 11 invented. Ket ills 35 cts. Stotfsoid inahotise. Sample post uad.livecents.FORSHEE&MAKIN Ch»ein0aM.O No advance fee. lath and G," Washington, D. (X PATENTS am? PENSIONS Secure*. Fitzgerald & Cc Mothers' Friend a*»Is a scientifically prepared liniment ' --every ingredient of recognized value, and in constant r use by the medical profession. These ingredients are Combined in a manner hitherto unknown, and WILL f)0 all that is claimed for it, AND MORE. It shortens Labor, Lessens Fain, Diminishes Danger to • life of Mother and Child. Scat by Express en Receipt of Mea, Si.g* par Bstlla Book to "MOTHERS" mailed FREE, containing voluntary testimonials, SaM ky All Bni||ltto. BRADFIELO REGULATOR CO., Atlanta. Oa c e t . r n c s E £ a l z e k \ s -No r t h e r n Gr o w n 5 E L . ' 3 A C 1 ' I LI I III I I I I I-I U 11 Ul.l III I 1 1 U I I I I 1 1 I M I JOHN A 5ALZERSEFP(° LACP°55E W »wwwwii'wwwewer WALLPAPER *W%, WE w i l l I youourfotvt I | Kilt wall pu ; p«»raud b.'V- ' Jer for a u 10x13 for &1.25 13x14 for •1.50 14*10 for 1.7* 16x18 for 9I.OO i-h from ?.'*• tfl eitrv Seiui Sc f»r Sum rvnd full Dimtf«wi» tor llsnipnjf. I SCOVI1.I.!." WAI.l, IWI'KK MFG. C O.. J50 to '.'."i t S. St.. Chicago. A I'nck of Playing Card* furnished by the Burlmgton lioute iB. & Q K. 1U. which tho Best Railway lrom Chicago aud St. Louis to all points .Northwest. West aud Southwest. Seiid 15cents iu potitaco for a full deck to P. 8. EL'SIIS, Qen- vr >! Pa6»eii#»r Ajfent CmcAOO lu,. 1,000,000 COMPART ia Mlmxaou. m. Th#j willb*awtto]r«« MRU OR LAND i yjjm * Dcuita KAIUOM Sand toK^nlQ|||; P I S O ' S C U R E F O R C«a>a«ptlTM and peopla who hare weak lung* or Asth ma, ahoald us« Piao'aOnrefor Consumption. It hu tarH tkMMad). it has not Injur ed one. It ia not bad to take. It is tko bMtooagh ajnraj*. Sold "MTrtM*. •*«. ' O N - M P T i O S - -A, J., < .W ASTHMA, CUBSD. NKupsinnu Oi*«s atUcfte n*» Ptokafa ctlptof«l.WL Hi Ban*. Thos. PoDham,PhUa.Pa ' 4