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524 ' ' TELEPHONE EXCHANGES. Boll TeleptHMM. • The fr>Hnvrtng aw the namos * mrrrrtttr* of the patrons of the MoHritry and West Me Henry t\\e h anil's of t he < 'Mcujro Telephone <V>. Residences only are sptMithnl. All others re business houses. . SIMON 8TOFFKI*. Manager, t* Aurlnfjcr Dr. A. E. rS33 Niesen M M 5S:-i3 Rarbian Bras 388 Owen L H r 853 Barbian NEr 281 (>*»•» O W r ^ •.; . "i Bolev 1 i F 381 Owen OSr >-- • :m Boswell H C SllOwou & Chaptfl x 5S»1 Brand JohnF SKMO'NYHl Rev. fit 212BuchJJ 8411'ageOLr .801 Burke Thos 383 Plaindealer ' . 1 IttS Besley. O. W. 282 Rosed ale 811 Chapell S S r 8H4Hoss l>r K O :t22 Dermont MrsS 208 Boss l>r FOt 381 Enguln Anton 254 Hupp A O r . 8>v{ Engeln M 348 Snnniers Geo r . „ s 8"rl Enjjeln Mr 321 Spurling I)r A C r :t:H Fegers DrOH 372 St otTel h r 861 Frett Bros & Witt 304 Stoffel S postofflce W3 Gilbert Bros , 5 StottVl Simon 3 Gilbert Bros toll sta£T3 Story J I r 893 Hazel E. J. r 282 Story Julia A r 84a llanly Geo A r 323 Stafford R \V 1153 Hertz H L r 231 Village of McHenry 80H lloltz & Stilling pumping stat ion 804 Howe A L r 861 Village of Mo Henry ii.i'2 Howell MAr ~ president's res 313 Justen Jacob r _ 234 Villageof McHeur.v 844 Justen N J public school ".J23 Lamphere O. E. r 302 Wattles F H 312 Lamphere Ray r 311 Wells Or I) G 351 Lorimer Wm r 7 Western lT Tel Co 844 McHenry Cre'm'ry 371 Wight man Harry Company. 214 Wight man Harry r 224 McHenry Journal 222 Wheeler E 8 r 3 6 1 M e O n i b e r F L 2 4 2 W h i t i n g W E r TOLL STAx IONS. 4 2rings, Pistakec Bay. Ben Stilling 4 3 rings, Johnsburg. John F Lay 4 4 rings, Solon. W H Davis, 10c toll 4 5 rings, Spring Grove, A Neish, 10c toll Citizens' Telephone. The following are the names and numbers of the patrons of the McHenry and West Mc­ Henry exchanges of the Citizens' Telephone Co. Residences only are specified. All others are business houses. GEORGE F. BLETHEN, Manager. 13 Auringer Dr A E 43 Jensen H N 13 Aiiringer Dr. A E r 16 MeOniber F L ,83 Brophy l)rFoxLake21 Meyer Geo r ;u> Buch J J 23 Mertes Joseph, IMs- 21) Bacon Wm r takee Bay 48 BuckIknd J V, Ring-23 Mineral Spring. Pis- wood takee Bay 39 Boley G F 42 McHenry Laundry 45 Barbian Bros 43 Magueson G L Kose- 4 Cristy W Af dale 15 Chapell SSr 10 Miller John r 36 Clemens HE 23 Nell George, Johns- 36 Clemens J C burg 49 City School 23 Nye Dr 4?t Couway & Rainey 84 Owen & Chapell 36 Cristy \V A 28 Perry & Owen Ringwood 37 Pumping Station 40 Depot C N W Ry Co38 Post office. McHenry 23 Dighton Station i Plaindealer 83 Erickson II 48 Smith Will r 6 Evanson W C 48 Smith E. A. r 8 Evanson John r 8'Summer George 11 Fegers I)r C H 50 Spurling Dr A C 11 FegersDrCHr 28 Sirues Henry 18 Fried ly AC 47 Schiessle Kobfc 33 Granger F K r 14 Story Miss Julia A 12 Granger Chas 34" Snyder Bros 82 Heimer Joe 87 Schneider Joe 31 Heimer John 23 Simes. Dighton Stft- 3 Holtz& Stilling tion 83 Heman Joe, Johns-48 Smith J. D. r burg 32 Tweed R G 83 Howard Ed C, Fox . Veils Dr D Lake V. ells Dr D r 19 Hazel E J 7 Wilbur Lumber Co. 35 Justen Nick 30 Walsh M J 44 Justen Jake 17 Wattles Frank 5 Wightman Harpy Co. Phone No. 9. Long Dist. Phone No. 342. GEO. SOHMERS Plumbing Gas Fitting Sewerage Also Agent for Eagle Acetylene G&s riachine Gae Fittings, Gas Fixtures and Carbide for sale All kinds Brass Valves and i.on Pipe always on hand. WEST M'HENRY, ILLINOIS Musical Instru­ ments And everything that pertains to flusic. MILO HOWE, - West McHenry, Hi . Avyatatct Lev iMMtloaa. A correspondent of the Philadelphia Presa writes: "My right leg was taken off at the middle third of the thigh nearly 30 years ago, but sinc^ that time the sensation of the presence of the toes, instep^ heel, foot or knee la stronger than in the other leg, or stronger than it was before amputa­ tion. To me it seems that when the leg i» at rest normally there is no consciousness of any sensatlost at all in it, whereas there is always more or leaa sensation in the stump. My leg was amputated in such a position that it seeme when I stand to be flexed with the foot behind me. I have often tried to get it out of the way of a closing door or of persons passing me on the street. To this day 1 often fall in trying to put my foot on the floor when springing quickly from a sitting position. Year by year, also, there is a sensation of shortening, th$ foot seeming to come nearer the body. If I make an effort aa if to extend the knee a sensation of heat occurs in the stump, although the rest of my body may be freezing." " ' Followed Uncertain t.e«4. A man was going home to hiii wife and family. It was growing dark. His road from the station was a lone­ ly one, and he was getting along as fast as he "could, when he suddenly suspected that a man behind him was following him purposely. The faster he went the ftrster the man went, un­ til they came to a graveyard. "Now,'* he said to himself, "I'll find i* he's after me," and he entered the church­ yard. The man followed him. Vague visions of revolvers and garroters grew upon him. He made a detour of a splendid mausoleum. Still the man was after him, round and round. At last he turned and faced the fellow and afeked: "What the dickens do you want? What are you following me for?" "Well, sir, do you always go home like this? I am going to Mr. Brown's house with a parcel, and the porter at the station told me that if I'd follow you I should find the place, as you live next door. Are you going home at all to-night?" -- Chicago Chronicle. Aatiqal Actor*. The training of animals of different species to act together upon the stage, or in the ring, is an art especially flour­ ishing at present in Paris. Horses and dogs are found to be the most tractable when trained together. A trainer at the celebrated Nouveau Cirque has, after two years of effort, brought out a horse and four dogs, which, together with the trainer himself, perform a serpentine dance to the sound of music. One dog dances between the horse's fore legs, another between its hind legs, and a third rides on its back, while the horse itself dances, and the fourth dog dances between the legs of the dancing trainer.' O--ee sdbbpoooooo<hhhmmhhm Ladies' Belt Buckles Watch Chains and Bracelets at Cost Price SOCIETY P IN 5 Woodmen Masonic Maecabee Foresters Beauty Pins First-class work only in watch and clock repair­ ing. All work guaran­ teed for one year. Sew­ ing machine repairs of all makes JOS. SCHNEIDER, - NdMry. III. Painted the Mahogany Doors. For years the. two beautiful doors at the entrance of the white house have been grained in imitation of black wal­ nut, but in the spring cleaning this year, says the Chicago Record, Col. Bingham ordered the paint scraped off so as to have them done over. To the astonishment of everj'body, it was dis­ covered that the doors were of solid mahogany and of beautiful grain. Col. Bingham ordered them restored to their original native condition, and is now trying to find out what fool had them painted. « \ Tronble* All Aroasi. Mrs. Crimsonbeak--John, do you consider the efforts of the peace con­ ference were a failure? Mr. Crimsonbeak -- Decidedly so. Look at the troubles in the Philip* pines, this unpleasantness in South Africa, and even the members of our church choir. I understand, are hav­ ing troubles of their own.--Yonkers Statesman. A Bit of History. "To arms! To arms!" Marco Bozzaris uttered the words in a tone of pleading rather than of com­ mand. And Iphigenla Kalikrates, his sweet­ heart, obeyed orders. There were "Sunday beaua," a» well as wars, in the days of ancient Greece. --Baltimore American. She Wm a Dream. Tom--Do you believe in dreams? Dick--I used to, but I don't any more. "Not as superstitious as you were, eh?" ,401 It wasn't a question of super­ stition. I was in love with one once, and she Jilted me." -- Philadelphia Press. Inadmissible. Bobbs--They wouldn't accept hear­ say evidence at the trial of that deaf- mute burglar who was accused of sawing into Nobbs' house. ~ Dobbs--I suppose they limitejf it\ to see-saw testimony.--Baltimore Amer­ ican. Insurable. Doctor (to a new patient)--Well, my good man, what's the trouble? Patient (angrily)--Sir, I am an al­ derman! "Really? Well, I cannot do any­ thing for that."--N. Y. World. An Exehangc of Compliment*. Emma--I haven't the face to stare at a man like that. Sarah--No, dear, and you. haven't the face to make a man stare at you like that, either.--Philadelphia Bulle­ tin. OoselvalWt "What does she say?" asked the crafty politician who had referred the committee to his wife for information as to his intentions. "She refuses to talk," replied the spokesman of the ^committee. "Then it wasn't n\y wife you met, gentlemen," he rejoined, with great positiveness. "It was somebody else." --Chicago Tribune. • Wants the Real Thin*. Jack--Old Newriche is terribly wor­ ried about that pretty daughter of his. Tom--What's the matter? Does she want to marry some foreign nobleman ? Jack-r-No; that's just the trouble. She is engaged to one of these Ameri­ can chappies, and the old gentleman says hsrlfe rich enough to afford thfe real thing*fjilnd doesn't want any cheap imitations.--Town Topics. Conaolattoa. fi i I with beautiful triplets have lately been blessed, And, thougrh not quite overjoyed at the favor thus shown. As I dandle the babes, I'm not wholly dis­ tressed To reflect as a sire, that I'm holding my • own. . • ' .. --Harlem Life. - ANNIHILATION OBSTRUCTED. The Dog--Just my luck! They've gone and fenced that lion in so's I can't get at him!--Detroit Free Press. Leisure. To indolence the human soul inclines-- Ah, me! the pleasure of an idle day When, while the suh above so brightly shines. There's none but Nature busy making hay. --Puck. A Needless Expense. "It costs a great deal to keep you in shoes, Tommy," sighed Mrs. Tuck­ er, as she started him on an errand. "She won't keep me in these shoes such a warm mornin' aB this, you bet!" remarked Tommy to himself a few moments later in the solitude of the coal-house, proceeding rapidly to get outside of 'them.--Chicago Trib­ une. HLs Explanation. "Did you ever bribe anybody?" asked the man who is sadly undiplomatic. "How dare you ask such a question?" exclaimed the professional influencer. "When I find a man who can be made to agree with my . views, I ad/mire him and I think virtue ought to be reward­ ed. And I proceed to reward it."-- Washington Star. Dlsconra«lnir Women. "Some of the most successful men in politics," he said, thoughtfully, "have been those who have had little to say." Naturally she itfas indignant. "There you go!" she exclaimed. "Always doing your best to discour­ age women."--Chicago Post. The I2caj»t. "Mrs. Youngly is going to sue for a divorce." "On what ground?" "Intolerable cruelty. Last week her husband locked her for, two hours in the same room-with five new frocks and two new hats--and no mirror.**--N. Y. World. Matter of Economy. Bingo--I think, after all, I shall go to Europe with my family, Twickenham--Why, I thought you oouldn't afford it ? "Well, it's cheaper for me to go with them than to let them go alone."-- The Smart Set. A Pleasant Thouarht. Friend (in railway train)--You say you are getting influenza from that lady's open window, and yet you 6eem to be very gleeful about something. What is it? Passenger--I know she must be get­ ting pneumonia.--N. Y. Weekly. Jolte Was on the Lawyer.^- - Barrister--I was deceived in regard to that man whom I defended on a charge of embezzling half a million. Friend'--You found lje was guilty? Barrister--No, confound it! He was Innocent, and hadn't a ha'penny to pay me with.--Tit-Bits. Pomeatio Repartee. She--I-always speak out when I have anything to say. He--Yes, but the trouble is that you do not limit yourself to speaking out when you have anything to say.-- Chicago Post. Miracle*. Bobby--Mamma, do miracles ever happen now? Mamma---Sometimes. Your father came home from the lodge last night, and I didn't smell any cloves.--Syra­ cuse Herald. In Cutting Eye-Teeth. As an aid to cutting one's eye-teeth a gold brick Is more effective than a rubber ring.--Chicago Daily News. Strange But True. The thermometer has no vote, but !t always registers. -- Chicago Daily News. Johnny's Soliloquy. "I shall be glad when I get big enough to wash my own face," mut­ tered little Johnny after his mamma had got through with him, "then I won't wash it."--Cincinnati Enquirer^- In His Own Measure. "I believe your friend, the apoth­ ecary. takes a dram occasionally." "Oh, yes. I believe he has no scruple* it."--Philadelphia Press. !--: --r- Bvtdenee of Her Dial Ike. -- . "fiow she hates me," sighed the lit­ tle woman, referring to a neighbor. "Hates you!" exclaimed her hus­ band. "Have you ever heard of her saying an unkind thing about you?" "Oh. no. It's worse than that. She calls our little Willie into her house every chance she gets and gives him things." "What does she give him?*," • ^ : "Dyspepsia, principally Post. • After That the Deluge. "Well, that settles it," remarked the editor meaningly, "we lose all our German readers." , "What?" exclaimed^ his assistant. "Why, we give that new society of their's a big notice in to-day's issue." "We meant to, but--listen to this from the opening paragraph: 'To be eligible for menibership one must be Of German birth or decent.'"--Phila­ delphia Press. Couldn't Be Lo#it.-- O! yes, 'twas true, no love was lost between them, There couldn't be, as you would quite agree -j/ • _> If it had been your pleasure to have seen • them-- ' - .. t ,, They sat so close together, he and she. --Philadelphia Press. MOT FLATTERING,. Maid--I am sorry, but Miss Emma is taking her singing lesson, and I have strict orders not to admit any visit­ ors! • Visitor--How considerate I--Meggen- dorfer Blaetter. A Blooming Retort. "Somehow I feel just like a tree, The sap a-climbing up in me," Observed the budding chappie; The lassie answered, him to grieve: "And, feeling so, I'd think you'd leave." Which left him quite unhappy. --Town Topics. Perhapa. "O! yes, she has quite a growth of hair on her lip." "Indeed? Is it really very notice­ able?" "Yes. Quite marked. I wonder she doesn't try to get rid of it." "Probably she thinks it's a bargain, if it's 'marked down.' "--Philadelphia Press. The Family Growlers. Mrs. Westside--Will that dog of yours fetch? Mrs. Eastside--Oh, yes. "Will he fetch coal upstairs?" "Oh, no; my husband brings up the ^oal." "Oh, the other growler does that I** --Yonkers Statesman. Still the Last. Father--I'm glad to see, Johnny, that you were sixth in your class this week. You were only eleventh last week. Johnny--Yes, sir. Five of the boys has been home sick* all week.--Phila­ delphia Press. ------------ Getting Tired. "May I beg for a small subscription to the fund for the Home for Reformed Convicts?" "Good heavens! This is the tenth year I have subscribed to that thing. Haven't they reformed yet?"--N. Y. World. Bachelors and Benedicts. Quericus--Let's see: the married men all have better halves, don't they? Cynicus--Yes. Quericuis--Then what do the bache­ lors have ? Cynicus--Better quarters!--Tit-Bits. A Welcome Change. "Colonel," said the sentinel, as he saluted the officer in command of the besieged town "a horseless carriage approaches." "That's good news," replied y^ije^ colonel. "Now we may expect^some horseless beef."--Chicago Dailj( News. Point of Resemblance. "My son," said the selfish parent, "you take after your father." And he helped himself first to the provender which the free lunch man had thoughtfully provided.--Philadelphia North American. Two Klnda of Heroes. "In every fiamily there are two kinds of heroes." "Who are they?" "Those who go to a doctor when they get sick and those who won't."--Indi­ anapolis Journal. Love In High Life. Madge--If your engagement with Bertie was such a success, why did j'ou break it off? Maud--Why, at the end of two months the poor fellow didn't have a cent left.--Town Topics. A Successful Artist. Penn--Does "Dauber make much money out of his pictures? Brushe--Not directly, but he gets a commission from the framft maker.-- N. Y. Journal. e lite- The Man with the Mouth. He has a voice which makes the crowd With wonder stand and blink; He talks so long, likewise so loud. He has no time to think. --Washington Star. • .• -I * FOR PURE DRUGS AND MEDICINES, NOTIONS- TOILET ARTICLES, STA­ TIONERY, SCHOOL SUP- " d, -J4T PLIES, BOOKS, PINE CHINA AND GLASS, WARE, ETC. CALL ON - JULIA.A. STORY - M'HENRY, ILLINOIS - HENDERSONS Empress Shoe AS found the greatest favor with the modem woman who seeks perfection in shoe quality. The Emprkss is made from the best brands of Chrome Kid, with flexible soles of the highest grade stock, giving a wonderfully sy fitting1 shoe, handsome looks and superior style. It's Perfection in Shoe Satisfaction for Women. HENDERSON'S SHOES are the Substantial Kind. Henderson's "Little Re<l School House" Shoes for Children and their "Quorum" and "Direc­ tor" for men give the greatest sat­ isfaction in Weartag Qsalltici, Cosriort Sad Style. a Always Ask Your Dealer «o5r Henderson's Shoes. C. M. HENDERSON & CO. Chicago. Largest Shoe Manufacturers in the West. House Cleaning i MM ## t i In cleaning house the house­ wife usually finds a piece of fur­ niture that should be relegated to the woodshed, or perhaps she may wish to install a new chair ©r table. If you want something nice in the furniture line, at a moderate price, it will behoove you to call on us first. Anything from,a foot stool to a parlor suit Carpets and Rugs We make a specialty of carpets 0 and rugs, and can furnish your rooms any style or quality at a price to please. We also have a nice line of matting s s s JACOB JUSTEN ricHenry, Illinois s i • •••••••• •--*-- 0--* IPHLIP JAEGER : General Commission merchant Stall 1 & 3, Fulton St. Wholesale Market, Chicago, Illinois. Special attention given to the sale of Dressed Beef, Mutton, Hogs, Veal, Poultry, Hides, Etc. Butter and Eggs This is the oldest hou&e on the street Tags and price lists furnished on application, COLD STORAGE FREE. 4 [mmmm ........ ................ ........ ........ ........ ............. Drugs, Medicines and Perfumes Fancy and Toilet Articles 3. S. BROHin 6 son DRUGGISTS Ringwood, - Illinois Prescriptions carefully compounded by H. C. Russell, registered pharmacist Patent Medicines Drugs Books and Stationery } <HMHKHHMHMKKH>00<HMHHKMHMKMMHKH»00 AO0OOOOOOS OOOOOOOOO 4