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t '• fc V innnnrri T nmnv iUUDCifLLI UIVCD ROUS LECTURE Former r̂eSidkit of States at Oxford United LORD CUR20N IN THE CHMR Shs!dcr,!sr, Theater Crowded WHh Distinguished People When Am»K lean Talks on "Biological An­ alogies In History." Oxford, England.--The Romanes lecture bf Tiletniure Roosevelt, wulci was to have beeTi delivered on May 18, •fcut which was postponed on account of the death of King Edward, was given on June 7 by ^be distinguished American. Th* Sheldon ian theater was filled to it* capacity by notable persons and Oxford students and the lecture, which was on "Biological Analogies in filstory." was well re­ ceived. Lord Curzon. chancellor of the university, presided. In seeking to penetrate the causes of the mysteries that surround fcot only mankind but all life, both In the present and the past, said Mr. Roose­ velt,, we see strange analogies in the phenomena of life and death, bf birth growth and change, between those physical groups of animal life which *e designate as species, forms, races and , the highly complex and composite entities which rise before our minds when we speak of nations and civi­ lizations. It is this study, he assert-, sd, that has given science Its .present- day prominence, and the historian of mankind must work In the scientific spirit and use the treasure-honsee 01 science. To illustrate, the lecturer took sev­ eral instances of the development of •sew species and the extinction of spe­ cies in the history of mammalian life, showing that in some cases the causes ean be traced, with considerable accu­ racy, and In other cases we cannot so sauch bb hazard & guess as to why a given change occurred. Analogies l«* Human History. Continuing, Mr, 'Roosevelt said in part: Now, m to all of these pnenoniena In the evolution of species, there ace, if not tKunoiogles, at least certain analogies, in the history of human societies. In the History of the rise to prominence, of the development and change, of the tem­ porary dominance, and death or trans- •Grmation, of the groups of varying kind Which form race* or nations. As in biology, so in human history, a •ew form may result from the specialisa­ tion of a long-existing and hitherto very aJo«f!y-(-hang1ne generalized or 'non- Specialized form; as. for Instance, when a barbaric rare from a variety of causes Suddenly develops a more complex culti­ vation and civilisation. That Is what Oc­ curred. for instance. In western Europe during the centuries of the Teutonic and later the Scandinavian ethnic overflows from the north. All the modern countries Sf western Europe are descended from the States crssicd by these northern Invaders. When first created they could be called *1aew" or "young" states In the sense fhat part or all of the people composing them were descended from races that Idtherto had not been civilised at all, and tti&l therefore for the first time entered Sn the career of civilised communities. In the southern part of western Europe the new states thus formed consisted in Sulk of the inhabitants already in the land Under the Roman empire; and it was fcere that the new kingdoms first took Shape. Through a reflex action their Influence then extended back into the cold fcrests from which the invaders had come, and Germany and Scandinavia witnessed the rise of communities with essentially the same civilization as their southern •elghbors; though In those communities, Vnllke the southern communities, there was no infusion of now blood, and In each ease the new civilized nation which gradu­ ally developed was composed entirely of Sbembers of the same race which In the same region had for ages lived the life of a slowly changing barbarism. The same Was true of the Slavs and the Slavonized Finns of eastern Europe, when an infil­ tration of Scandinavian leaders from the •orth and Infiltration of Byzantine vulture from the south Joined to produce the changes which have gradually, out of the little Slav communities of the forest and the steppe, formed the mighty Russian empire of today. "New" and "Young" Nations. Again, the new form jmay represent •terely a splitting off from a long-estab- tished. highly developed and specialized aation. In this case the nation is usually Spoken of as a "young,"' and Is correctly S|>oken of as a "new," nation; but the term should always be used with a clear Sense of the difference between what Is described in such case, and what is de­ scribed by the same term In speaking of a civilised nation Just developed from a barbarism. Carthage and Syracuse were aew cities compared with Tyre and Cor­ inth; but the Greek or Phoenician race was 111 every sense of the word as old In the aew city as in the old city. So. nowadays. Victoria or Manitoba is a new community compared with England or Scotland; but the ancestral type of civilisation and cul­ ture is as old In one case as In the other. X of oourse do not mean for a moment that great changes are not produced by the roers fact that the old civilized race Is Huddenly placed In surroundings where It haa again to go through the work of taming the wilderness, a work finished a*aiiy centuries before In the original home of the rarm, I merely mean that the ancestral history Is the same in each case. We can rightly use the phrase "a new jifeople" In speaking of Canadians *r Australians. Americans or Afrikanders. But we use It In an entirely different #en»e from that in which we use It when speaking of such communities as those founded by tlie northmen and their de­ scendants during that period of astonish­ ing growth which saw the descendants of the iw* vw OOiiQuvt ilijvt trftUS- tslands; we uso it in an entirely different sense from that la which we use it when speaking of the new s'tatea that grew up around Warsaw, Kief, Novgorod, and Moscow, as the wild savages of the steppes and the marshy forests struggled haltingly and stumbllngly upward to become builders of cities and to form stable governments. The kingdoms of Charlemagne and Alfred were "new," compared with the empire on the Bos- phorus; they were also in every way dif­ ferent; their lines Of ancestral descent had nothing in common with those of the polyglot realm which paid tribute to the Caesars of Byzantium; their social prob­ lems and aftertime history were totally different. This is not true of those "new" nations which spring direct from old na­ tions. Brasii, t'>« Argentine, the uniieu states, are all "ne\v" nations, compared with the nations af Europe; but with whatever changes 'n detail, their civilisa­ tion Is nevertheless of the general Kuro- pean type, as shown In Portugal, Spain, and England. The differences between these "new" American and these "old" European nations are not as great as those which separate the "new" nations one from another and the "old" nations one from another. There are In each caate very real differences between the new and the old nation--differences both for good ami far nni JJ2 eSLC!! {" the same ancestral history to reclton with, the same type of civilization, with ita at­ tendant benefits and shortcomings: and. after the pioneer stages are passed, the problems to be solved, in spite of superfi­ cial differences, are In their essence the same; they are those that confront all civilised peoples, not those that confront peoples struggling from barbarism into civilization. So. when we apoak of tfce "death" a tribe, a hlitlon or a eivtinutlo.r the teirtfn may be used for either one or two totally different processes: the analogy with what occurs lr biological history being complete. Certain tribes of savages, the Tasmanlans. for instance, and variou* lit­ tle clans of American Indians, have within the last century or two completely died out; all of the Individuals have perished, leaving no descendants, and the blood has disappeared. Certain other tribes of Indians have as tribes disappeared tor are now disappearing; but, their blood remains, absorbed tnto tiio veins ui the white intruders, or of the black men introduced by these white Intruders; so that In reality they are merely being transformed into something absolutely different from what they were. A litre W iun unioJi; lit >.<-/ covered In the statement that a civilisa­ tion has "died out." Phenomena That Puzzle. In dealing, not with groups of human beings in simple and primitive relations, "but with highly complex, highly special­ ised. civilized, or semi-clvtllzed societies, there is need Off great caution In drawing analogies with what has occurred in the development of the animal world. Yet even In these cases It is curious to se* how some of the phenomena in the growth and disappearance of these com­ plex. artificial groups of human beings resemble what has happened in myriads of Instances in this history of life on thts planet. Why do great artificial empires, whose citlsens are knit by a bond of speech and culture much more than by a bond of blood, show periods of extraordinary growth, and again of Budden or lingering decay? In some oases we can answer readily enough; In other cases we can­ not as yet even guess what the proper answer should be. If In any such case the centrifugal forces overcome the cen­ tripetal, the nation will of course fly to pieces, and the reason for its failure to become a dominant force la patent to every one. The minute that the spirit which finds its healthy development in local self-government, and In the antidote to the dangers of an extreme centraliza­ tion, develops Into mere particularism, into inability to combine effectively for achievement of a common end. then it IS hopeless to expect great results. Poland and certain republics of the Western hemisphere are the standard examples of failure of this kind; and the United States would have ranked w>ih them, and Its name would have become a byword of derision, if the forces of union had not triumphed In the civil war. So the growth of soft luxury after It has reached a certain point becomes a national danger patent to all. Again, it needs but little of the vision of a seer to foretell what must happen in any community if the average woman ceases to become the mother of a family of healthy children. If the average man loses the will and the power to work up to old age and to fight whenever the need arises. If the homely, commonplace virtues die out. If strength of character vanishes In graceful self-indulgence, If the virile qualities atrophy, then the nation has lost what no material prosperity can Offset. ^ , •; But there in plenty of other phenom­ ena wholly or partially Inexplicable. It Is easy to see why Rome trended downward when great slave-tilled farms spread over what had once been a countryside of peasant proprietors, when greed and lux­ ury and sensuality ate like acids Into the fiber of the upper classes, while the mass of the citizens grew to depend, not upon their own exertions, but upon the State, for their pleasures and their very liveli­ hood. But this does not explain why the forward movement stopped at different times, so far as different matters were concerned; at one time as regards litera­ ture, at another time as regards architec­ ture, at another time as regards city building. We cannot even guess why the springs of one kind of energy dried up while there was yet no cessation of an­ other kind. Holland as sn Exsmpls. " Take another, and smaller lnstano*. that of Holland. For a period covering a little more than the seventeenth century, Holland, like some of the Italian city state* at an earlier period, stood on the (dangerous heights of greatness beside na­ tions so vastly her superior fn territory and population as to make It inevitable that sooner or later she must fall from the glorious and perilous eminence to which she had been raised by her own indomita­ ble soul. Iler fall came; It could not have been Indefinitely postponed; but It came far quicker than it needed to come, because of shortcomings on her part to which both Great Britain and the United States would be wise to pay heed. Her government was singularly ineffective, the decentralization being such as often to permit the separatist, the particularly, spirit of the provinces to rob the central authority of all efficiency. This wa» bad enough. But the fatal weakness was that so common In rich, peace-loving societies, where men hate to think of wai as possi­ ble. and try to Justify their own reluctance to face it either by high-sounding moral platitudes or: else by a philosophy of short-sighte^ materialism, The Dutch were very wealthy. They grew to be­ lieve that they could hire others to do thsir fighting fee them oa land; and «a ZZt., AM tMf AtL'n Airhtln# and fought very well, they refused in time of peace to make ready fleets so ef- w&'ja. 'tt- Is aa evil and a dreadful thin* t« *•& ftattalM tn hitm* --T:i r'Jwd to our duty to do all things possible -cr - the betterment of social conditions. Sclent as either to Insure the Dutch ' But it i» an unspeakably foolish thing to against the peace being broken or els' f strive for ihla betterment by means so to give them the victory when w? v came. To be opulent and unarmed I: secure ease in the present at the ajir pefc. certain cost of disaster In the futur/. It is therefore easy to see why Ho 'and lost when she did her position amo',< r, the powers; but it Is far more dlfficuR t<f efc- plain why at the >same time thoi» should have come at least a partial lose aZ posi­ tion In the world of art and let*?t:. iome spark of divine fire burned s'* -nit In the national soul. As tha II',? of great statesmen, of great warriors, W' land and sea, came to an end. so tt> • line bf the great Dutch painters ends' •" The loss of pre-eminence iu the schjOw' f followed tha loss of pre-eminence la amp and la council chamber. In the little republic o Hoik nd. as In the frreat empire of Rc as, it was not death which came, but transformation. Both Holland and ZtaV teach us that races that fall may risv again. Danger of fcvmt Suicide. There ars question" "whic;; «?• ef the great civilized natlr-nr- are sver tempted to ask of the future. I« our tln>< of growth drawing to an end? A., we as nations soon to come under t i* rule of that great law of death, whisl. a liaei; but part of the great Isw of life * Jone can tell. Forces that we can sec- jn'i other forces that are hidden or that t. s but dimly be appre­ hended are it k all around us, both ior good anc for Tha growth in lux­ ury. In love 4* IS«> in taste for vapid and frivolous! s> J'sment, 1b both evident and unhealthy fhe most ominous sign Is the dlminwtlc , in the ivirth-rate. In the rate o? naturii ^;;rea»a, »ow to a larger or leaser degr« ;j i'ftarec'i oy most of the civilized uatiiv.it, tf Cijfal and western Europe, ct Ar <r-', % mtvi Australia; a dim­ inution so gr ui >at ii u continues for the next century a: (fie t;»!e which has ob­ tained fort >• irr- JS yj/ara, all the mora highly civil r/acl ./o.rple will be stationary or else h? b run to go backward In populatlor jf?-Jit; r„iary of them will have already ?c W v.ry ft r backward. There that Should give lis con­ cern fo *th': tuns. But there is much also which iti*:. d gi l: ' us hope. No man Is mo-V an« j Ins mistaken than the prophet off ri,j " believe with all nftf heart that n.,refit future remains for us; hut whether It id, or does not, our duly lr, not }. However the bat­ tle istey gro, thif! icldier worthy of the name will w' th i4 -nost vigor do his al- tasK, iiimdcu «) valiant­ ly !n defeat a« in victory. Come What will, \^_ beloT g' iu peoples who have sot yielded'to the rr wen fear of being great. In the ag«« that have gone by, the great nations^ i he nations that have ex­ panded - tl in t have played a mighty part In rorld, have In the end gror.n ol£>«ftl weakened and vanished; but ho have he nations whose only thought was to avoid all danger, all ef­ fort, who * ouldr risk nothing, and who therefore ^'nel nothing. In the end the same fate Eiay overwhelm all alike; but the rner.-x-.-f of; the one type perishes with It whlk'. other lei>\es Its mark deep on th# hhdgiT of all the future of man­ kind. In th<& first ipijrt of this lecture I drew certai n uns.lc ;»!'<« between what had oc- currei to forMs of animal life through the procession ef title ages on this planet, and what hattj i wurred and is occurring to the great a- lflclal civilizations which have gradually spread over the world's surface <J\jrf*ng the thousands of years that have 'tlapr :l since cities of temples and palaoe.n firs "ose beside the Nile and the Buphrate*, and the harbors of Mlnoan C?ote b. tied with the masts of the Aegea. era But of course the parallel is. t»ui snly in the roughest and meat Twn- way. Moreover, 'even between fh« c'vi ations of today and the clvi'lrat'Dr**. ancient times there are differc^icjt tft ofound that we must be cautious in tfcn; ing any conclusions for the prtspp'c teal* 1 on what has hap­ pened tn t'ae j,-uur.. While freely admit­ ting all of out ifiU«sa and weaknesses of today. It is yet .mwcj perversity to refuse to realize the 'vtsre&ble advance that has been made. ; •> ;;,l standards. I do not believe tn&* ii the slightest nec­ essary eon ne? M ! vjtwten any weaken­ ing of virile foi' ;nd this advance in the moral stx*.Jt rd this growth of the sense of obligation "'•> rwie's neighbor and of reluctance to d» tinit neighbor wrong. We need have scant vdence with that silly cynicism whl «v, t >S*ts that kindli­ ness of character ox ij- accompanies weakness of charact* '• 1 >. the contrary. Just as In private Ul't ?. ,.-.y *\t the men of strongest character i vh*> very men of loftiest and moat 'nd n \ rallty. so I believe that in nationt . .>ii"e the ages go by we shall find thi*'jtln ,t ' "manent national types will more _ i\d «,• , *e tend toWarda those in which, TOV'S £1 intel­ lect stands high, character x.\\.-»ds 'gher; in which rugged strength Vyjvofc,, rage, rugged capacity to resist \ " >?gl>i ag­ gression by others, will go ht ^ lu nd with a lofty scorn of doing wr> H •:<•> >. t.*- 1 ers. This Is the type of Ttt* ,\v Hampden, of Washington and , Problems of Modern Natlo destructive that they would leave no so­ cial conditions to better. In dealing witb all these social problems, with the inti­ mate relations of the family, with wealth in private use and business use, with la­ bor, with- poverty, the one prime neces­ sity Is to remember that, though hard­ ness of heart is a great evil, It 1* as greater an evil than softness of heed. But in addition to these problem* ths most intimate and important of all which to a larger or less degree affert all the modern nations somewhat allka we of i«i« great nations that have expanded, that are now in complicated relations with cr.c another arid with alien races, hax*s special problems and special duties of our own. xou belong to a nation which pos­ sesses the greatest empire upon which ths sun has ever shone. I belong to a nation which Is trying, on a scale hitherto unex­ ampled, to work out the problems of gov­ ernment for, of, and by the people, whIU at the same time doing the internat>onai duty of a great power. But there are certain problems which both, of us £av« to solve, and as to which our standards should be the same. The Englishman, ths man of the British isles, in his various hAWfts an rnee can, both at home and abrcari, are brought into contact with utterly alien peoples, some with a civilization moM an­ cient than our own, others still la, of having but recently artaert from, th% bar­ barism which our people left behintt ages ago. The problems that arise are ov well- nigh inconceivable difficulty. They (Cannot bo solved by the fcolidh sentlmenta-lty of stay-at-home people, with little latent recipes, and those cut-and-dried theories of the political nursery whlcii hav^ such Uinited applicability amid the cr3«sh of elemental forces. Neither can they be solved by the raw brutality of t\e men who, whether at home or on th* rough frontier of civilization, adopt rright aa the only standard of right in dea^ng with other men, and treat alien race* only as subjects for exploitation. No hard and fast rule can be drav/n as applying to all alien races, beeause they differ from one another far r<.ore wide­ ly than some of them differ frtm us. But there are one or two ri^Jss *Vhich ssust not be forgotten. In the lon£ run, there can be no Justification for o*»e race man­ aging or controlling another unless the management and control a*"e exercised In the Interest and for the benefit of that •««(. kus is wyat our peoples have In the main dor**, and1 must con­ tinue in the future lit even greater de­ gree to do. In India, fcgypt, and the Phil­ ippines alike. In the next place, as re­ gards • every race, everywhere, at home or abroad, we can*tt>t afford to deviate frotn the great rtle of righteousness which bids us treat each man on his worth as a man. He must not be senti­ mentally favored because he belongs to a given race; he must not be given Im­ munity In wrong-doing, or permitted to cumber the ground, or given other privi­ leges which would be denied to the vicious and unfit among themselves. On the other hand, where he acts in a way which would entitle him to respect and reward If he were of our own stock, he Is Just as much entitled to that respect and reward if he comes of another stock, even though that other stock pro­ duces a much smaller proportion of men of his type .than does our own. This has nothing to do with social intermingling, with what is called social equality. It has to do merely with the question of do­ ing to each man and each woman that elementary Justice which will permit him or her to gain from life the reward which should always accompany thrift, sobriety, self-control, respect for the rights of others, and hard and Intelli­ gent work to a given end. To more than such Just treatment ho man Is entitled, and less than such Just treatment no man should receive. ASSIST RAILROAD AN ACHINQ BACK r#e-"N Duty of Nation to Nation. Tfcs other type of duty Is the Interna­ tional duty, the duty owed by eoe na­ tion to another. I hold that the laws of morality which should govern individu­ als in their dealings one with the other are Just as binding concerning nations tn their dealings one with the other. The application of the moral law must be different fn the two cases, because In one case it has, and in the other it has not, the sanction of a civil law with force behind it. The individual can depend for his rights upon the courts, which them­ selves derive their force from the police power of the state. The nation can de­ pend upon nothing of the kind; and therefore, as things are now. It is the highest duty of the most advanced and freest peoples to keep themselves In such a state of readiness as to forbid to any barbarism or despotism the hope of ar­ resting the progress of the world by stri­ king down the nations that lead In that progress. It would be foolish indeed to pay heed to the unwise persons who de­ sire disarmament to be begun by the very peoples who. of all others, should not be left helpless before any possible )- foe. But we must reprobate quite as strongly both the leaders and the peoph Every modern civilized nation he,*. . ife*! >vho practise, or encourage or condone, arid terrible problems to solve ****%> %-f v/aresslon and Iniquity by the strong at own borders, problems that aris-:.\« H v«; e qptpense of the weak. We Bhould tol- merely from Juxtaposition of poverty A> ) ;>• ate lawlessness and wickedness neither riches, but especially from the seAt-fit-j. , by vS>e weak nor by the strong; and both sciousness of both poverty and rk?hee. Each nation must deal With these nat­ ters in its own fashion, and yet the spMi. tn which tbe problem is approached must ever be fundamentally the same. It must be a spirit of broad humanity) of, brotherly kindness; of acceptance of re­ sponsibility, one for each and each for all; and at the Same time a spirit as re­ mote as the poles from every fprm of weakness and sentimentality. As in war to pardon the coward Is . to do cruel wrong to the brave man whose life his cowardice Jeopardizes, so in civil affairs tt is revolting to every principle of Justice to give to the lazy, the Vicious, or even tbe feeble and dull-witted, a reward which Is really the robbery of what braver, wiser, abler men have earned. The only effective way to help any man is to help him to help himself; and the worst lesson to teach him Is that he can be permanently helped at the expense of some one else. True liberty shows itfkelf to best advantage In protecting the rights of ethers, and especially of minorities. Privilege should not be tolerated because It is to the advantage of a minority, nor yet because it Is to the advantage Of a majority. No doctrinaire theories ef vested rights or freedom of contract can stand tn the way of our cutting out abuses from the body politic. Just a lit­ tle can we afford to follow the doctrln- sdres of an Impossible--and Incidentally off a highly tfodeslrable-- social revolution which, in destroying individual right* (including property rights) and the fam­ ily, would destroy the two chief agents in the advance of mankind, and the two chief reasons why either the advance or the preservation of mankind is Worth vcejtk and strong we should in return iwat vlth scrupulous fairness. The for- eim policy of a great and self-respecting o<K ntry should be conducted on exactly tM plane of honor, of Insistence upW. -n^'t. o vn rights and of respect for the (£< others, as when a brave and hoti-rK iU *u^n is dealing with his fel- Jpws n»» to support this state­ ment out iSt-jay own experienoe. For neariy eight <^ea» 2 was the head of a great nation t.od charged especially with the conduct of Its foreign policy: and during those years I took no action with reference to a^y othe* people on the face of the earth that J wouJd not have felt Justified in taklt.y- as an individual la dealing with other Individye is. I believe that we of th£> great civilised nations of today have a right feel that long careers of^aghlevem<»ni 1 ,c before our several countrlef; To each ot us Is vouchsafed the honorable privilege ot do­ ing his part, however small, thai vork. Let us strive hardily for succ vsm, ev c-v, If by so doing we risk failure upuri. ^ the pboi-er souls of small end«%vor wk,o smmytar. HE Union Pacific railroad has discovered a new use for billy goats and every day at half a hundred stock feeding stations on the line of the big railroad system, solemn goats with long white beards act the part of Judas, luring uususpecting sheep to their doom. Little did the grave members of the Interstate Commerce commis­ sion think when they made a ruling that live stock en route from the great western ranges to the packing houses along the Missouri river, should not be kept aboard railroad trains for more than 28 consecutive hours, but that, at the expiration of that period, the'animals should be taken from the cars and given water and provender that the ruling would be responsible for the creation of a band of goats tratned to Ingratiate themselves into the confidence of Innocent little lambs, matronly ewes and stately rams and bring these down to their death. But such is the case. And the Union Pacific railroad- has a flock of goats, each Individual member of which cah do better work along the lines for whlch it is trained than -half a dozen men could do In twice the time. When the 88-hour law went into effect the Unioft Pacific railroad found It necessary to build big feeding yards at numerous points along its line--in fact, these yards were Installed about every 25 miles from end to end of the big system. During the shipping sea­ son that railroad brings hiindreds of thousands of sheep 'from the great ranges of Wyoming, Colorado, Utah. Idaho, Oregon, Montana, California and the southwestern states to the packing houses at Omaha. Under the new law it was necessary that these sheep be unloaded, fed and watered, and then reloaded every 28 hours. Those men who have ever attempt­ ed to drive sheep will remember how difficult the task is, especially to get the animals headed In the right direc­ tion. "As timid as a sheep" is a proverb, and its truth is proven every dhy and every hour wherever sheep are handled. if the sheep are In the stock cars It Is a big Job to get them out. Efforts /Of the attendants to get them to leave the cars usually result in the whole bunch crowding up in one end and re­ fusing to go out the door. Sometimes It was even necessary that each indi­ vidual sheep be actually lifted up and taken from the car. And sometimes this 28-hour limit expired in the dead of night, when the sheep were all lying asleep on the floor of the car. At such times it was almost impossible to unload except by the "hand" method. At times halt an hour was consumed In unloading a sin- know neither failure nor »uc'cess.\ L«t W | Car. hope that our own blood shall continue j "ter the sheep were fed and wi in the land, that our children and chil-Y dren's children to endless generation? shall arise to take our places and play a mighty and dominant part In the world. But whether this be denied or granted by the years we shall not see, let at least the satisfaction be ours that we have carried onward the lighted torch in our own day and generation. If we do this, then, as our eyes close, and we go out into the darkness, and other hands grasp the torch, at least we can say that our part has been borne well and valiantly. THE BEST THAT MORGAN GOT v 'fT, Imperious Financier May Keep Memory One Man He^Could 1 Not Browbeat. In The yarn of the other day about -Mayor Qaynor and a bell-boy recalls ":* another one. Ciaynor, you know, slept at the Hotel Astor one night, having & ' | '^f , been detained there very late, in the '7". morning he couldn't find his way to, <§/ f » " the elevator, and met one of the pert youths who browbeat the hotei guest. Iff "Aw, toller yer nose," Bald the kid, 'Si • - 0 0 t * 0 1 ® bother wit' Mr. Oaynor's nose ultimately led jhjpi (» the office and shortly after­ ward a clerk's nose led him to the seventeenth floor and the boy's nose Ie4 hi pi to Broadway, with instruc­ tions to stay out of the Astor forever It recalled to a reporter the tima that J. Pierpoot Morgan got tan­ gled up with a menial. Mr. Morgan, you IIMIX know, i* imperious and dictatorial. He speaks in grunts. When the grunt is not readily inter- t: preted by his unfortunate opposite, he roars. On this occasion Mr. Morgan had gone to one of the big uptown hotels to attend a banquet. He asked a large person at the entrance where he could find the banqueting hall. The large person sent him along, and Mr. Morgan next met a hall porter who had just been discharged and was looking for a chance to get even. Mr. Morgan grunted inquiringly. The por­ ter grunted sullenly. "Wuh-wuh-wuh," grunted Mr. Mor­ gan. "Wah-wah-wah." growled the por­ ter. "How dare you?" asked Morgan. "Say," said the porter, belligerently, "1 don't know who you are, you old skeezicks, but if you unpin that lip uh yourn again I'll hang a brace on It". "My name la Morgan.' hanker, indignantly. "Well," said the porter, after look? him over carefully, "m took^ It." ^ that's ta* besruuir rnrnu? got.--Boston Traveler. Mummified Headi ftearcs. Mummified heads of South Amer­ ican Indians belonging to a tribe liv­ ing on the slopes of the Andes near Quito, in Ecuador, once so easily pur­ chased, are becoming extremely scarce. The head Is shrunk by some secret process known only to the na­ tives, being thus reduced from life size, nine or ten inches from tip of chin to top of head, to Ave Inches. The curious thing is that the head can be reduced in this fashion without destroying the features. These heads, some of which are of great antiquity, are now almost Impossible to procure. Their sale Is forbidden by law/--» Wide World Magazine. Satirical Voltaire. One day some mice said to one aft- other*. "How f harming if this -World! What an empire Is ours! This palace •o superb was built for us; from all eternity God made for us these large boles. Do you see those fat hams un­ der that dim ceiling? They were cre­ ated there for us by Nature's hands; thorn mountains of lard, inexhausti­ ble aliment, will he ou«s till the end of time. Yes, we are, great Ged, If our sages tell us the truth, the mas­ terpiece, the aim, of all Thy work! Cats are dangerous and prompt to (de­ vour, but it is to. Instruct and, oorrect us!"--VoKalre. *1 <er*^ came the reloading, and again th^re trouble, almost as much as when Tjh jidteg. The raili - ^ found It necessary to maintain a !**>:•:' force of men at each feeding *t being found more economic Go than to spend hours and henrs jotting and unloading a train. This cost mdney, and lots of it, but there seemed no means of avoiding the expense. There stood the United States courts ready to inflict a $100 fine every time a car of sheep was not fed and watered every 28 hours. Employing the men was cheaper than fines. , , Common Law. The common law of England fs *a ancient collection of unwritten max­ ims and customs of British, Saxon and Danish origin, which, by long use and approval, have become fundamental In English jurisprudence. Many of the principles of the English common law hold in this country and throughout the English speaking world as welL ' One day a stockman who bad come Into South Omaha with a train of sheep dropped in at Union Pacific headquarters to see General Superin­ tendent W. L. Park on business, and q the course of his conversation be­ an telling of the trip down from daho. He had had lots of trouble oading and unloading, he said, until he reached North Platte. Neb. "But there I saw the funnietft thing In my life," he laughed. 'The station agent there has a hpy and that boy has a goat--Just a plain old billy goat And that billy goat has. learaedvto chew tobacco. "When we got ready to load bur sheep, that kid took a plug of te» bacco in his hand and started. Billy started after the tobacco. The k|d walked through the sheep and old Billy followed him. And blamed If all those sheep didn't walk right after that old goat. They thought he waa one of them, and you know a sheep will follow where another one leads. "The boy walked up the chute into one of the cars. Billy was right be-' hind him and'sheep were simply fait ing over themselves to get in. The boys and Billy, remained near the door and when the car was filled with sheep they got out and the door was closied. "That freckle-faced kid and that old biiiy goat did in five .minutes ' what half a dozen men could not have done in ten." ^ The stockman saw only a funny oo currence In the work of the goat, but Park saw the solution of a big proh- lem. Two fcoitra later a special train car­ rying tbe general superintendent left the Omaha yards, its destination be­ ing North Plattte. On arriving thpra the boy proudly made Billy show off. Within a month every feeding star tlon on the Union Pacific system waa equipped with a couple of hilly goats and their training was begun. Today, when a long line of stock cars, each filled with sheep, drawB up at a feeding yard, one of these goats is sent up tbe chutes and into the car among the sheep. He quickly makes the acquaintance of the newly arrived animals and then palmly walks out the door. True to the idea of follow^ ing a leader, the sheep fall incline and march out behind oH Bill. This action is repeated until all $he cars are emptied--and then Bill gets his reward--a chew of tobacco. The goats have learned to chew to­ bacco from the train men who pet and tease them whenever they have the opportunity, and the "chew" is usu­ ally given them as a reward when their task of unloading a train of sheep is completed. The railroad com­ pany makes a regular allowance to pay for tobacco for these goats. When ready to reload, the goats are again sent among the sheep, with whom they frolic a few minutes, and then they start for the cars, followed by the sheep. When all cars are. load­ ed the goata receive'another chew of tobacco. , "the feeding yards are all equipped with electric lights so that cars may be loaded and unloaded at night, thua saving much time. And when a train arrives at night, especially are the goats necessary. At such times they enter the cars where the sheep are ly­ ing on the floor and butt the sleeping animals around until they are thor* oughly awakened--and then they lead them out into the feeding pens. These goatB are great favorites of the railroad men and seem to kno# every brakeman and train employee on their division. But not a single* one of the railroaders Is more neces­ sary to the economical operation of the line than Is one of the Bills, and none of them do more work for their salaries than the goata for their feed and tobacco. ~ Tiie facility of tbe goat for tt}is worV has long been known at the packing houses, where they are utilized to lead anlipala to slaughter. Romance. "It seems she did something ratlM* odd--wedded her first love or some such silly thing." "No. tt was far more remarkable--loved her first wed­ ded."--Smart Set ~ " ' . Another View It^/ y n Then is a quality of possible re> vtnio in having »i.uck 'Ike a parous planter to ma unworthy friend. It hurts tim all right when yott 4» pul! »V«7 finally.--Fuck. ' mm,,/ •'•tfrfe/<<-A- 43£f.:v '\-M. A - - Hie Ptilloeophy. , Hank Stubbs--Ambition ain't hard- lr wuth while. Bilge Miller--Why not? Hank Stubbs--Waal, ef you are be­ hind the procession you hafter keep bumpin* Into somebody, an' ef you git ahead you're liable to git teller-scoped. - An Independent Spirit. "This earth gets a chance to «ee Halley's comet only once in 75 years." "Well," replied the man wl\o is strong on local pride, "we aren't get­ ting ady of the worst <^f It., That's as often as Halley's comet gets a ahanea to see the earth." Anxious. Fred--My dear Dora, let this thought console you for your lover's death Remember that other and bet­ ter men than he have gone the same way. Bereaved One--They haven't all gone, have they?--Exchange. Proof of It. "I know that she considers us worth while." "Whyr "I noticed that ah# wore her only pair of silk stooktngs IHien I eater talned the sard olub."--Detroit IV* Press. Makes a Difference. * "I heard your dad say 'libs' the devil' the other day." "My dad has a right to talk about the devil. He's a preacher."--Chicago TUtains, A poor man that hath little, and de­ sires no more, is, in truth, richer than the greatest monarch that thinketb he h»tl» not what he should* or what hs might; or that grieves there is ne More no have. i fflshnp Igftlk • • Means weak iUdneya.--:;'^""'-*:;#* Well kidneys filter the blood of acid and other Impurities. When the kidneys are sick, waste matter accu> KBlates and backache* headache an# • l l urinary troubles r*> IfcTure^^ H ' sult- To elimiaat*; Is .[3 •"I the aches and pains you must cure thn kidneys. Doantli Kidney Pills cure sick kidneys, and cure them perm* neatly. J. N. MArkhaa. Montesano, Wast»^ says: "Kidney tro«> ble came on me gra4> ually and before long I was suffering from dropsy. My body bloated aad my flesh was soft and flabby. I tired easily and suffered severely from pate In my back. Doan's Kidney Pills cured me and I am today in much better health." ; Remember the name--Doan's. Star sale by all dealers. SO cents & box, Foster-Milburn Co., Buffalo, N. H' fHtOOP POSITIVE* Hix---My son; must be Insane. Nix--What makes you think so? Hix--He got married yesterday tw only gets $10 a week salary. i&NAT CAU8E8 PELLAGRA. Cemmlttae on Disease In Europe Says Corn Is Not to Blame. Loudon, May 14.--Dr. Sambon, a member of the Field committee which has been Investigating the disease pellagra, telegraphs from Rome that the committee has definitely proved that maize or Indian corn la not ths cause of pellagra. The committee finds that the para- nltlc conveyor of the disease Is ths "slmulluiB rej>aB*," a spsotss of bitinc A Mcrrss Leva?. James R. Keene, who Is noted no toss as a horseman than as s financier, snM at a luncheon at his Cedarhurst residence: "My lore of horses has been a great comfort to me ail my Iff®. 1 have ml* Ways kept my horses in their place, though. I haven't allowed them to in­ terfere with my business. : "Some men* carry their love si parses altogether too far. Such a ons Was A young father Who stood, with his fair wife, before the crib of their first born. • * " 'Isn't' he wonderful 7' the young mother cried. 'Did you ever see any­ thing like Win at twenty-six months!" " 'Maternal love is all very well,,0 father retorted, Impatiently, 'but ftieas# don't try to compare It with a two- year-old thoroughbred/" Good Work Proceeds Slowly. At the present rate of Increase !y forty-five years must elapse before sufficient hospital accommodations to provide for all the indigent consump­ tives in the United States will be pro­ vided. declares the National Associa­ tion for the Study and Prevention ©f Tuberculosis. Although over 7,000 beds in hospitals, sanatoria, camps and wards for tuberculous patients were eetablished last year, there are fully 800,000 indigent consumptives who ought to be placed in such institu­ tions and a total of only 22,720 beds iu tbe entire country. On May 1, 190®, there were 15,244 beds for consump­ tives and 294 Institutions. The annual r*pcrt or the national association shows an inosease Of 89 institutions and 7,500 beds! Reasoning of Vouthful Mind. • schoolmistress' whose hair was of the blackest hue, was one day giv­ ing & lesson on a coal mine to a class In Suffolk, England. To make the les­ son interesting as possible she went on to say she had herself been in • coal mine. A little lad put up his hand, and when pointed to said: "Please, teacher, is that Jwjbat jQDr.&rir so blackr 0. FEED CHILDREN On Properly Selected Food. It Big Dividends. If parents will give Just a llttie '.elligent thought to the feeding ef their children the difference in the health of the little folks will pay. many times over, for the small trouble. A mother writes saying: "Our chit dren are all so much better and stronger than they ever were before we made a change In the character d the food. We have quit using potar toes three times a day with coffee and so much meat, "Now we give the little folks some fruit, either fresh stewed, or canned, some Grape-Nuts with cream, occa­ sionally some soft boiled eggs, and some Postum for breakfast and sup- par! Then for dinner they have mm* meat and vegetables. "It would be hard to realise the change in the children, they have grown so sturdy and strong, and we attribute this change to the food ele­ ments that, I understand, exist fan Grape-Nuts and Postum. "A short time ago my baby was teething and had a great deal of atom- ach and bowel trouble. Nothing seemed to agree with him until I tried 'Grape-Nuts softened and mixed with rich milk, and he improved rapidly and got sturdy and well." Read "The Road to WellvUle," found in pkgs, "There's a reason." Sw rea« the above »u«rt J 9 m * a y p c a n f r o m t f a m t o m W l tw sm