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Pledged but to Truth, to liberty and LawjUNo Favors Win us and no Fear Shall Awe, M'HENRY, ILLINOIS, WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 18, 1895 WHISKERS UNDER HIS VEST. How One Alan Employs His Hirsute Ap­ pendages to Advantage. "Are beards lucrative, or, in other words, can one make any money by wearing them long1?" said a young1 man i about town, reports the Philadelphia Call. "Upon the first thought and per­ haps even after one has evolved the question carefully in his mind, he would reply no. But they are wrong, as the folr lowing case of an old artist will show. By 'old artist' is not meant a genius like Hairnet, Ahgelo or men of tha^. class, but a painter who, besides being noted for his superior work in portraits, is conspicuous for the quantity of hair which sprouts from his chin. -This gentleman, it is said, has won many a wager on his beard, which is of such g-reat length thath.e is compelled to wear , i t underneath his vests K o one ever sees the hirsute growth, except;when he ex­ hibits it'to settle a bet. To saunter into a saloon and get into conversation with some of the customers there has become a hobby with him, for in doing so he has an object. He frequently gets a drink in consequence of betting with some other fellow v^ho has a fair­ ly long beard as to whose is the longest, and it is seldom tll'&t he loses a wager of this kind, for his whiskers extend to the bottom of his waistcoat." MUSIC HATH STRENGTH. Piano Players Are Heavy Weights on the Ivory Keys. It requires more force to sound a note gently on the piano than to lift the lid of a kettle. A German com­ poser has figured that minimum pres­ sure of the finger playing pian­ issimo is equal, to 110 grams--a quarter of a pound. Few kettle lids weigh more than two ounces. At times a force of six pounds is thrown upon single key to produce a solitary effect. With chords the force is generally spread over the various notes sofihdAd simultaneously, though a greater ont- put of force is undoubtedly expended^ This is what gives pianists the wonder-V ful strength in their lingers so often- commented on. \ A story used to be told of Paderewsk/ that he could crack a pane of plate glass half an inch thick merely by plac­ ing one hand upon it, as if upon a piart^- kej'board, and striking it sharply with/ its middle finger. Chopin's lastStwiy in C minor has a passage whichjtakes two minutes and five seconds ^dj^play The total pressure brought to bear on this, it is estimated, is equal to three full tons. The average "tonnage" of an hour's piano playing of Chopin's music varies, from 12 to 84 tons. A TOAD BAROMETER. The Creature, In Its Own Way, Predicts Rain and Shine. A remarkable story is told in the New Yprk Tribune about a curious living barometer in a conservatory at Plainfield, N. J. The indicator of weather changes is a diminutive tree toad, whose apartment is so arranged that the slightest change in the density of the air is foretold with wonderful accuracy. The toad was caught at Felt- ville a few months ago, and Mrs. Lissig- nolo placed the little reptile in a large glass jar. Standing at an angle in the jar about two-thirds full of water is a pinall but perfectly formed ladder, and upon this the toad rests continu­ ally, never moving a muscle except when a change in the weather is to oc­ cur. When the earth is dry and the skies clear, the toad squats contented­ ly upon the topmost rung of the lad­ der. Just as soon as storm ap­ proaches, and many hours before it can be seen or felt in New Jersey, the tree toad begins to descend in thfe lad­ der step by step. The nearer the storm ' comes the lower"the toad goes, until at close approach of the stormy weather it sits half submerged in the water. The little fellow has been christened "Mr. Dunn, of Plainfield." Not an Insult. Maj. Lomax, of the United States army, visiting in Canada soon after the war of 1812, was entertained in Quebep by the officers of one of the royal regi­ ments. After dinner, speeches and toasts being in order, one of the Brit­ ish officers, having imbibed too gener­ ously of the champagne, .gave as a toast: "The president, of the United States, dead or alive." The toast was accepted with laughter. Maj. Lomax rose to respond, saying: "Permit me to give as my toast: 'The prince re­ gent, drunk or sober.' " The British officer sprang instantly to his feet, and in angry tones demanded: "Sir, do you intend that remark as an insult?" To which Maj. Lomax calmly replied: "No, sir; as the reply to one." Wanted the Cow Most. A sensation was created at Carlisle, Pa., the other night at the home of Henry Uundorf, where a wedding was to have taken place. The bride-to-be Henry Dundorf, where a wedding was Joseph Derr, a farmer residing at Plain- field, was the recalcitant groom. The guests had arrived and the wedding dinner was in preparation at the Dun­ dorf home, hut the groom did not ar- : rive, and the bride began shedding tears. Then the groom appeared and in a busi­ ness like way informed the girl and her father that the marriage would have to be postponed, as the money he had ' saved toward defraying wedding ex­ penses he now intended to use in the purchase of a cow. Derr then left the house. "Excuse Mistakes." A good-natured mistress lately acted as amanuensis for a negro maid who could neither read nor write. The servant had not enough intelligence to ' guess that the lady who wielded the pen for her was well known in the > world of letters, and"made what is pro- vincially called "a pretty penny" by !her use of the quill now called into requisition to inscribe from dictation • several letters to southern friends i of the dictator. To her scribe's intense' amusement each epistle concluded with the petition: "Please excuse all mis­ takes." ' . , . ! it, J ' THE BLENHEIM SPANIEL. Most Lovable of the Four-Footed Pets of Womankind. Of all the pets of womankind, babies alone excepted, thero is nothing more 'lovable than the tiny Blenheim spaniel,1 says an exchange. Why this breed of dogs have the name of the palace of the duke of Marl­ borough i}o one seems to know. The story go&i, however, that the first.duke- had the breed, and that, on a friend's requesting a puppy, he refused-to part 'with „ one, but, at the same time*' took two or three, blind whelps and threw them to tame eagles. • , •, ' ' ' But in the year 1800 his grace, the duke- of Marlborough, was reputed to possess the smallest and best breed of cockers (woodcock spaniels) in Brit­ ain. They were invariably red and •white, with very long ears, short;noses, - and; black eyes. They were evidently ; the ancestors of the present Blenheims, which are still bred by the keepers of the lodges at Blenheim and some of thp~ inhabitants of Woodstock. But there is little doubt that they have been crossed with the pug to give them the very short snub noses which they now possess. , Moreover, the breed has become very delicate and difficult to rear. They suffer from brain dis­ ease, and are more likely than any other tlogf to die in puppy hood. "Idstone," . the celebrated writer on dogs, repaem- bers the time when the Blenheims were mainly bred in the vicinity of the pal­ ace. He suggests as a probable crig^ inal of the Blenheim the Japanese toy spaniel. The surmise seemS very prob­ able. . HOW LIGHTNING KILLS. It Is the "Up Stroke" That, 19 Always the Most Fatal. s A new theory as to- how lightning kills, but, one which may well be held in abeyance until a clearer solution of it can be presented, is just now being urged by the scientists, says the St. Louis Republic. According to this new-fangled idea, a person is never "struck" by lightning at all--that is, in the general sense of the word quoted. The new theory is the result of deduc­ tions that have been made along the following lines: All life is electric. In 'the human body the stomach is the generator and the brain the battery. When a person js killed by lightning he is not "struck" at all, but dies be­ cause of a sudden loss of electric power which had been impelling his physical engine. The loss of this vital fluid, if such it may be called, is brought about in this manner: A thunderstorm is passing over. It is charged with posi­ tive electricity and the earth beneath is charged negatively. The human electric battery is between. If the cloud is charged heavily enough it saps the negative electricity from the earth, using the human being as a conductor, and finally leaves him lifeless by taking his electricity with that from the earth. This theory is in line with that which originated a few years ago and which was to the effect that it was the "up stroke" that kills. POTATOES WERE EXPENSIVE. Bis Bills Follow a Husband's Scheme to Hide Cost of Cigars. One of the funniest things that have occurred in Joliet during the present year, says the Joliet (HI.) Republican, was the mishap of a gentleman who formerly lived on the west side, but is now a resident of the city, and whose wife ran the store bill and looked after the household expenses. He was in the habit, by agreement with his grocer, of having his cigars and occasionally goods that were not exactly cigars charged up as potatoes. One evil day. his wife took her pencil and; began to reckon up the accounts. She finally found that the family had eaten over three car loads of potatoes in less than, a year, and she just Aidn't believe that the account was correct. The smoker and the smoker's grocer were between the upper and the nether millstone for ^everal days, and it was doubtful who> g\ ould be pulverized the finest, but (peally. an explanation was made that mollified the wife, even if it didn't satisfy her as to the correctness of tie grocer's charge for potatoes. , Can't See the Joke. ] Here is the serious manner in which a big London daily and a sedate London magistrate treated an old-time Ameri­ can joke: "A strange society waa brought to ligl^t during the hearing ofi a case before the Thames magistrate. Several men were charged with stealing! a watch from a sailor and were all dis- , charged except Alexander Fullerton, on. whom were found a> post office savings bank book for £ 49 and a card of mem­ bership with a curious title. It bore the* following inscription: 'National Liars* association. Having been a member of the above association, and finding you a bigger liar than myself, I must con­ gratulate you on relieving me Of this card.' It must be gratifying to the East End community, as well as a tribute to Fullerton's own abilities, that he found no one worthy of relieving him of tha card. The magistrate remanded him, for inquiries." A Double-Action Joke. Dumas fils tells of a double-acting joka which he played on Meissonier, whoi, was a botanist in his hours of leisure. The famous dramatist sent him a paper containing the dried roe of a herring, telling him that it was the-seed-ofLa very rare plant. "How are the seeda coming on ?" he asked the great paint­ er the next time he saw him. "Oh, beautifully; I have planted them in a circle." And he took the astonished' joker to a corner of the garden where the heads of young herrings were just peeping out. ' ' ' v)j| nig Arrowhead. An interesting relic was discovered > near San Bernardino, Cal„ recently., ; . It is tm immense sculptured arrowhead,' four feet four inches long, and weighing • ikore than 200 pounds. It is of bluish granite, and shaped in perfect imita^ tion oi the smaller arrowheads , quently in that region. 1 J SPECIAL ATTRACTION PUBLISHED ETEHY WEDNESDAY BY J . V A N S L Y K E EDITOR AND PROPRIETOR. OFFICE I N ICHOLS BLOCK, Two Poors Nort33if Perry & Owen's Stori, ELGIN, ILL TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION: On o, year (in advance) »....... J1 50 If Not Paid within Three Monthe... .... 2 00 Subscriptions reiceiven for three or gix months in the same proportion. RATES OF ADVERTISING: ; I We announce.liberal rates for advertising the Pt.AINDfcAi.EB, and endeavor to state 8 eta so plainly that-they will be readily ua- hrstood. They.are.*6 follows*. , ' 1 Inch one year - • 5-W- 2 Inches one ye'ar . - - *; - - 10 GO 3 inches one yea-- - . - - 15 00 Column one year - • • (•- -• - 30 00 Goiiihm one year- - CO 00 Column one year - - - - 100 00 One ncn means the measurement of one inoh down the column, single column width. Yearly advertisers, At the above rates, have the privilege of changing as often as they ehoose, without extra charge. Regular advertisers (meaning those having standing cards) will be entitled to insertion of local notices at the rate of 5 cents per line each weok. All others will be charged 10 cents per line the first week, and 5 cents per line for each subsequent week. Transient advertisements will be charged at the rate of 10 cents pe line, (nonpareil type, same as this is set in) the first issue, and 5 oents per line for subsequent issues. Thus, an inch advertisement will cost $1.00 for one week, $1.50 for two weeks, $2.00 for three weeks, and so on. The PLAIHDEALHB will be liberal in giving eiitorial notices, but, as a business rule, it will require a suitable fee from everybody seeking the use of its colamns for pecuniary gain. - --- ----- cut Ting OUT. DIRECTORY OF THE BIG STORE For t;lie iiioiitli of December. i BUSINESS CARDS DR CORTH^LL OCULIST. Home Office, No. 67 Washington Street, Chicago. Will make a return visit to McHenry, . Monday and Tuesday, Dee. 23d and 24th. OFFICE AT RIVERSIDE HOTEL. Dr. Corthell is the only Oculist who ever visited here having no glasses to sell, telling the trnth as to whether glass­ es or medical treatment only are needed, free of charge. Never buy ready-made glasses. Having visited Elgin and Lake Geneva monthly for the past two years there ie no question as to integrity, while his medical references make his ability un­ questionable, Next visit Dec. 23 and 24. The above will be sold at the lowest net cash prices. It will pay you to call andexamine our goods and prices, - Every axe and handle bought of us will be hung free of charg0- Having 110 expense, 110 rent or clerks to pay, we are able to undersell any and all competitors. Thankful for past patronage, and hoping for a continuance, I remain Yours Truly, THEO. F. SWAN, GREAT DEPARTMENT STORE ELGir1*. TI^Tj, FRANK L. SHEPAKD, 1OUNSELLOR AT LAW. Suite 514--8(1 La 1 Salle St., Chicago. McHenry, 111., Nov. 9, 1S95 O. H. FEGER8, M, D- >HYSI01AN AND gURGEON, MoHenry Ills. Office at Residence. JOS. L. ABT, M. D, PHYSICIAN, SUKGEON AND OOD LIST, Office in Nichols Block, over Plaiadealer Office. McHenry Telephone No 4. DR. A. E. AUR1NGER, PHYSICIAN ANDSURUEON. Office in the Stroner building, one door west of A. P. Bier'e store, West McHenry, III. Residonce, house formerly occupiod by Dr. Osborne, All professional eails promptly at­ tended to. WHOLESALE AND RETAIL AGENT FOR Don't delay your Christmas Shopping any longer you can shop with ease and get proper treatment. O. B. HOWE, M. D, pHTSICIAN AND SURGEON. Office and Ji Residence, Hotel Woodstock. Office hours I to 2 I', m. daily, (Jails promptly at­ tended to. Deserving poor treated tree ot charge at officc, Including medicine Monday and Friday. * Formerly called Dot's Ale FANCY GOODS Z& Black 81 Iks @ "Thousands of articles to select For Christmas Presents, (tellyour [r0m. ^5 husband). 24 in. cashmere fine silk, rich satin Duchess, elegant Shaving sets, toilet sets, fancy brocaded satin and gros grain, bottles, inkstands, albums, combs $1.50 value at the popular price of and brushes, clocks, handkerchief §1. Extra heavy 27 in. satin Duch- boxes, glove boxes, jewelry, pocket ess, and Peau-de-Soie, warranted to books, stationery, coilar and cuff wear, regular $1.75 quality goes fo^- boxes, opera fans, neckties, etc. L& $1.25. First class goods at lowest prices. One of the finest and most healthful drinks in the market, F. C. COLBY, D, D. S. DENTIST. Woodstock, 111. Special aten-tion paid to regulating children's teeth, Parties coming from a distance, will do well to give timelj noiice by mail. Office, Kendal block corner Mam street and 1'ublii.Sq are I keep the same on tap or sell by the Keg, Half Barrel or Barrel. Farmers wishing a pleasant, healthy drink, and one that will tone up the system,,,should try a keg of 'Alf and 'Alf. c. P. BARNES TTORNEY, Solictor, and! Counselor, . Collectlonsla specialty. WOOD8TOOK, ILLINOIS. A. ENGLEN KNIGHT & BROWN, TTORNEYS AT LAW. TJ. S. Express Co.'s . Building, 87 and 89 Washington St. CHICAGO, ILL. Annex Salesroom. $1 china, 75c china at 20c. Hun­ dreds of dozens of real Carlsbad, Tokio, Dresden and Vienna china, rich fine quality with beautiful hand decorations in colors and gold, choice cups and saucers, plates of all kinds, your choice at 20c; some of the choicest would readily com­ mand in a crockery store from 50c to §1. ^ Holiday Handkerchiefs. H. S. handkerchiefs, 3c and 5c. All linen hemstitched handkerchiefs ^ and St. Galleu embroidered hand- kerchiefs 10c. Over 100 patterns of choice ladies' handkerchiefs, comprising lace edge, embroidered, all linen, hemstitchen, initial, the prettiest patterns you ^ have ever seen, at 19c, 25c, 29c. Ladies' and gentlemen s silk em- (Jr hroidered and H. S. handkerchiefs, ^ 25c. Superior, all lined and Japan silk handkerchiefs, haild worked initials, 50c. McHenry, 111., Dec. 3d, 1895 JGHS2 P. Watchmaker &' Jeweler MCHENRY, ILLINOIS,, A FINE stock of Clocks, Watches and Jew airy alrrays on hand. Special attention given to repairing fine watohes. Give me a oall. JOHN P- SMITH, v. G„ MEAD, An endless variety to select from at lc, 5c, 10c and up, Best candies at reasonable prices. Justice of (he Peace and General In surance Agtnt Including Accident and Life Insurance OFFICE VTITU B. GILBERT, NEAE DEPOT, WEST MCHENRY, III. W. P. ST. CLAIR, Justia\')f the Peace\and{Notary Public Real Edtate a7id Insurance, UHDA,il l . Agents W anted! NOTICE In every town In McHenry County, and the Northern part of lllinois^to so­ licit Life Insurance for tKe A. Wi. CHURCH, Watohmaker and Jeweler No 126 State Street, Chicago. tpeclaf at tention given to repairing Fine Watehee an Chronometers »S" A Full Asaortment o! Goods in his l ine OUR OVERCOAT STOCK AJM you men and boys want to Is yet reasonably complete, the price is broken. We will aay right uere that we will save you money in the Overcoat line Fur Overcoats, heavy wool Suits, Ivereey Pants, Duck Coats, wool Shirts, Cardigan Jackets, plush Caps, Fur Robes, Plush Robes, Horse Blankets, Felt 3oots, Rubber Overs, Over-shoes, Rubbers, Mittens, Wristlets, etc. ' Green Apples, Dried Fruits, fresh Groceries, Jersey Lily Flour, Buekwheat and Grah in Klour, Con- JVfeal, Your-i for thV Holiday trade, „ . LIFE INSUR A NCE CO. OF MILWAUKEE, WIS. The Company has f75,OOO.OCO assets and ^15,od),000 surplus; iB 3$ years old and Pjiys larger dividends than any other life company in thi« country. For information apply to J. H. JOHNSON, Special Agent. Woodstock, 111 Or V. P. HEI'L, District Agent, Rockford, 111. lime R tT E. LAWLUS. » SEE those handsome Banquet Lamps, at Geo. W. Bealey's. They are beautite. Opposite Riveriide Hottl, MoHtnry, OK SUITS. Don't Miss this Chance On any kind of g'oods sold in my store, at Chicago's lowest pricts, Wcsterman & Son HOUSE, SIGN AND CARRIAGE PAINTERS. M OH HKRT, - - - - - I LLINOIS. We are prepared to do all work in our line on short notice ijnd gru^rtntee satisfaction PAPER HANGING A SPECIALTY. Prices reasonable and Work promptly done. ,. WESTERMAN 4 SOTF. McEenry, Jinnary 80,1804, JOHN J. MILLER, West McHenry,