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PubLi8iiei\»*Lvery Wednesday by - J . V A N S L Y K E , - BDITOJl AND I'HOPRIETOH. • OFFICE IN THE NICHOLS BLOCK,. . Two DoorsNdrthof .Perry & Owen'# Sfcor*i - TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION : •O no year fin advSoce)...... ........-- ?1 5Q It Not Faid with^ 'fjiree Months.:. .,.. 2 08 SuUapriptlonn resei'ven for three or gix oionfths i» ths same proportion. 1 F R E D m A U E R , KATES Of ADVERTISING^: Wo annsunoe Hber&i rates for advertising in the PLAfNDEALaK, and, endeavor to state tljem so plainly ,that, they wjll be readily un­ derstood. They are »s follows: , : . h oo (1 Inch one year 2 Inches one year 8 Inches one year - K Column one year. - X Column one year- Column one year - - 10 Co - 15 Oo . 30 Oo 60 Oo - 100 Oo One ncti means the measurement of one inoh down the column, siagle column width. Yearly advertisers, at the above rates, have the privilege of ohanging as often as they choose, without extra charge. Regular advertisers (meaning those having standing cards) will be entitled to insertion of local notices at the rate of Scents per line each week. All others will be charged 10 cents per line the first week, and 6 corns per line for eaoh subsequent week. Transient advertisements will be charged at the rate of 10 cents pe line, (nonpareil type, same as this is set in) the first issue, and 5 cents per line for subsequent issues. Thus, an inoh advertisement will cost $1.00 for one week, $1.50 for two weeks, #2.00 for three weeks, and so on. The Pt,atndualBB will be liberal in giving editorial notices, hut, as a business rule, it will require a snitable fee from everybody seeking the use of its columns for pecuniary gain. . Pre-Inventory Clearing Sale. If you could anticipate your wants; for three months to come y;, it woe1! pay yoit to meet them all now. DR. CORTHGLL. OCULIST. Home Office, No. 67 Washington fcreet, Chicago. Will make a return visit to McHenry, For One Day Only, ; V Saturday, Feb. 1 st ' Examination fe» §1, except when . glasses are ordered. : . . OFFICE AT RIVERSIDE „ HOTEL BICYCLES OF GREAT COST. BUSINESS CAliDS. FRANK L. SHEPARD, COUNSELLOR AT LAW. Suite 514--30 La Salle St., (Jhicago. C. H. FEGEES, M, D- PHTSlOiAN AND SURGEON, McHenry Ills, Office at Residence. JOS, L. ABT, M. D. itumoN A N rrwufTLsT;' Office in Nichoia Block, over Plaiudeftler Office. McHenry Telephoae No 4. DR. A. E AURINGER, PHYSICIAN AXDSURGEON. Office in the Stroner building, one door west of A. P. Bier's store, West Mo Henry , 111. Residenoe. house formerly occupied Dr. Osborne, All profesalonal ealls promptly at­ tended to, O B HOWE, M. D, PHYSICIAN AND SURGEON. Offi ie and Residence, Hotel Woodstock. Office hours 1 to 2 P. m. daily, calls promptly at­ tended to. Deserving j»or trestea free oi charge at office, including medicine Monday and Friday. F. C. COLBY, D, D. S. DENTIST. Woodstock, 111. Special aten-tion paid to regulating children's teeMi, Parties coming frotn a distance, will do well to give timely notice by mail, Office; Kendal block corner Main street and PublioSq are C. P. BARNES, l TTORNEY, 8oiicitor, and| Counselor, L 'lollections.a specialty. WOODSTOCK, ILLINOIS. KNIGHT &c. BROWN, Attorneys at law. u. s. Express co.'« Building, 8? and 89 Washington St. CHICAGO, ILL. JOHPS P. SMITH, ^tohraaker & .J ewoler McHENRY. ILLINOIS. A FINE stock of Clocks, Watches and Jew elry always on hand. Special attention given to repairing line watches. Give mc JOHN P- SMITH. H. C. MEAD, Jutlice of the Peace and General In­ surance Agent Including Accident and Life Insurance. Office with B. Gilbert, near Depot, West MoUenrt, III. W. P. ST. CLAIR, Justicdpt the Peacela,nd\ Notary Public Leal Estate and Insurance, 'J NDA,II I< A. M. CHURCH, Watchmaker and Jeweler No. 136 State Street, Chicago. BpeeJal attention given to repairing Fine Watehes an i Chronometers. a F' lll Assortment of Goods in his line JOEL H. JOHNSON, WOODSTOCK, ILL. Speotel Agent for the J* orthwestern Mutual Lile Iii»iii*aiioe Oo. llyl Of Milwaukee, Wis. Westerman & Son, HOUSE, SiCN AND CARRIAGE PAINTERS, MoHbnrt, Illinois. We are prepared to do all work in our line on short notice and guartintee satisfaction PAPErtJIANGING A SPECIALTK Prices reasonable and work promptly done. WESTERMAN & SON. McHenry, January 80, 1804. §1.25 ladies' flannel night gowns reduced to . 79c Broken line of the very finest all wool Cloaks, satin lined, sold at $15 to $25.00, take your choice for./. $5.00 S §10 capes,rone left, take it for §5 ftAll Cloaks and Fur Capes at less than the material is worth, jtfcvjuuauij S* , Goods At 19c, 25c, 39c, about one-third - the actual value. Gingham Ivit- chen aprons, two for 25c The ginghams are worth more. 4£) Men's sanitary all wool $1.25 Underwear.... 89c flannelette Remnants. V2%c quality at..... ......... 10 4 heavy gray Blankets 55c pr All linen Towel 5c Wrappers, flannelette and calico, dark color, reduced to about 50c on the dollar to close them. Gentlemen's Handkerchiefs 3c lieady-made pillow-cases, 30 by 45 in 10c $1.25 all wool skirts 75c 35c ladies' fast black fleece lined hose 25c Brokkn line of $1.50 and $1,25 Corsets, your choice for......~...50c Knitting silk, per ball ....5c ^ Watch for our Musl in and.Ui i - $ derwear Sale . c.f.bolEy, jDR FEUTH'S Proirielor of McHenry Brewery,! McHENRY, ILL. Always on Hand with the Bent Beer. A.C. SPUHLING Veterinary Surgeon, McHenry. Makes a specialty CASTRATION. &B~ Office at Hanly's Livery Stable. West McHenry, 111, Next Visit , > Friday. Jan. 24. Woodstock, n.- West Side Livery, FEED AND 8ALE STABLES E. J- HANLY, Prop'r. WEST McHENRY, ILJ*. First, class rigs, with or witliput drivers, furwlstaed at reesenable raten- l artjes tri and from the Lalfos in Easy lipi, prompt connection n\ade with all ijratRs. Our Rigs will be kops in first class sliap and we shall spare no pains to pjeflse our cfl toiuere at all times. Give usfe oeil, E J. HANLY, West MoHenry, 111,, Aug. 15, 1804. c&anca money. Agents Wanted i8T.' ®ko V I T A L Q U E S T I O N S ftF Tlir n A V Political Revolution of Ur I riC. iiM I . 's-2. Crif is of '»3 ami '94 BnttleB for breaa, Ooxbtism. strikes, the Oiietniiioved. Great Labor Issues of tho present and the Future Ta^fl' i.egiilation U'he «Vlver Questions. What "Protection does frjr the Aineflc^jn Worlanen. What Free Trade does for mm. A bo k for the hour- Bverybody wants it, Prb e only #J 50. Sells at sifht. Most liberal terms to agents. Sen t fpr rlrcnlars or send ?0 cents for agent's out fft at once P. W. Zikolkr & Co., B23 Market skr«8*, t, Louis, Miov WANTED SALESMEN, *' GOOD MEN In eaoh Oonity tt We want one or two o take or dors for a choice line of Nussery Stock anj Seed Potatoes, stock and seed guawnteed, Wn can give you steady employment wi.ro good pay. It cost you nothing to give H a trial. State when writing which you prefer to sell. Address. THE H A W K E S KURSERY CO., llmS MILWAUKEE, WIS. Agents Wanted! In every.town in McHenry County, and the Northern part of Illinois, to te- licit Life insurance for the NORTHWESTERN - MUTUAL LIFE INSURANCE CO. OF MILWAUKEE, WIS. The Companv has J75,r(X).O(-0 assets and §15,000,000 surplus: is 38 year3 old and pays larger dividends than any oi l ier l i fe company in thin country. . For information apply to J. H. JOHNSON, Special Agent. Woodstock, 111 Or V. P. HTCIL, District Agent, Rockford, 111. lime JOHN J. BUCH, RESTAURANT • AfT> BOARDING HOUSE Hear tho Iron Bridge, McHenry; Board by tho Day or Week at Reasonable rates, A ITtob Limb oriRow boat? \T mt Lahdihg. • Pare Wine*, Liquors and Choice Cigars always on hand. jWFreahLager Boer oomstantly on dranicht NOTICE. DISPENSARY At the Hotel Woodstock. DR FRUTH, after years of experience has perfpoted tbe most infallible method of cur­ ing Norvous deOillly, decay of body and mind, sel'-distrust, poor memory, weak eyes, stunted develomnent, lack of memory, im­ poverished bioon, low vitality, and all ettoct s of abuses, excesses, improper life, etc., whioli renders marriage unhappy and lite miserable . Specialties --Catarrh, Skin Disea&es, 8ores Pi nples, Scrofula, Biood Taint, Eczema, Can <i«r, Piles, and Diseases of Women \To Guarantee to Forfeij S500 for a case of SEXUAL DISEASE SK.wnadnf£jeE Cure, Question list FREK,: one parsbnai interview solicited. Oousuitation freo DR. D. O. FRUTH, 37 16 Lake Ave ( Chicago! PEERY & 0WEK, Banners- MoHENRY, - - HLLiNOIS This Bank lecetvea deposits, buyt and sells Foreign cmd Domestic, Ex­ change,and does a Stmera! Banking Business We endeavor to do all business en­ trusted io our oare m a manner and upon te:rm entirety satisfactory to ow customers and redpeotfully solicit thr public patronage. MONEY TO LOAN; On Beal Estate and other first o oQ4 86owr%. Special attention givent oo• lteofkm8< ITVfetJR«A.JS[OE] In First 0&g»« Own# atdit vt th* Irowesi J&mies. Tours -ifpei&tutti PERSY & OWE# > PUaLlC. Do You Want W n T , l r 0 A steady payingjob V V Ui Jt\, • with largest house in the west, 20 years established. With our fa­ cilities we can make a good salesman In two weeks from raw material. Nursery stook that is warranted to grow. 25 best varletiea teed potatoes in the world, etc. If you want money write, stating age. L L MAY & CO- r. St. Paul, Mien- Nurserymen, FloristB and Seedsmen. (This house is responsible) All you men and beys that, waht to Sa?e from $2 to $5 on Pauls * Olt SUITS. Don't Bliss this Chance On any kind of ^foods sold in my store, at Chicago's lowest prices, E. LAWLUS. Opposite Riverside (Hotel, McHanry. Dr. Price's Cream Baking Powder - World's F-alr Highest Medal and Diplopia. W A N T E D ! VVf A TVT To sell Canadian grown'Fruit 31 /\ r\^Tree.s, Berry Plants, Roses, Shrubbery Seen'Potatoes, etc , for the largest growers of high gnvde stoek. Seven hundred acres hardy profitable varrietie» that succeed in the coldest climate. No experience requir­ ed and fair treatment guarantees, ^oy one not earning J60 per month and expenses should write to us at once for particulars. Liberal Commissions paid part time men. Apply now and get choice of territory. UIKE..JKROT-HSaS riWiHT. 13niS Stock Exchange Building. Ohicajro FOR CM 7CT Beautiful Half Tone Enerar tbl'/NSravings 2x3 inches, for ft,75, ^ ' Tou < an print hundreds of 8}iou6and8 on any printing press. Send photo amd $1.75 and reoeive the out. Sample ff'ee Addrees Jkffbhson JAckscJH, M5 Dearbofn fireet, Chtoa^«. Unitefl Sta|es_f arClaii Apcy WM- p. COWLIN, Woodstook - - Illinois I •" • prosecutesatyclaesBSand kinds of claims "ast the tlfeited States for ex-Soldisre, - Widows, Dependent Relatives or Heira. iaim m ln Pro,ocullnK old and orftoiaiunioations promptly ansyrered If iffe Stamps are enolosed for reply. WM. M. COWLIN t £ i i b is, Mfcditce Bt.' W«cd£to I)r. Corthell ie the only Oculist who ever vifrtted here having n" glasses to sell, telling': the t^ntfa as to whetner glaas- «B.or ^nedioa]'-fereasttaWt only are needed, free.of charge^ < Never buy ready-made glaaees. • ' •> Having visited Eljfin fvtid Lake,Geneva monthly for the past two years there. is no question as to integrity,*^vhile his medical references make his ability un­ questionable, Next visit Dec. 28 and 24. J. D. LODTZ, Jr. |^erchant Tailor, Barbiau Bros. Block, McHenry. in addition to my Custom Tailoring business 1 have just put in a new and stylish stock of BENTS' FURNISHING GOODS, Consisting of shirts, collars, cuffs, neck­ ties, suspenders, etc., etc., which 1 can and will sell at the lowest figures. Just received, a full lide of Puffs, Society Knots, Joinvilie Scarfs, Full Dress Bows, Of the latest styles and novelties in the market. Also a line line of Colored Dress Shirfs. Call and see them. Good good:* and Low Prices is our motto. New York Firm to Meet a Demand for 81,000 Bicycles. - •> The most prominent New York jew­ elry firm has something new lor wheel­ men in a silver bicycle, which was put on exhibition at their fjtdre a few days ago. The'wheel is the first of the kind ever made. In order to insure strength and durability it was necessary , to. have the supporting rods and spokes of steel. Ml the rest of; the frameis of sterling silver. The handle bar is-of plain sil­ ver, w|th burnished ivory haiidles. The i other silver' parts' are finely, engraved, j by. hand; with repousse etching-of the j Louis"XVI. style. ; The sprocket wheel ' is, of plain stiver. Tlie saddle itseif is ' studded with silver' nails.,. The cost of the mafehihe, as it" stands, is $300. : /v Silver- lantern to go with it will add from $100 to $200 to the price.'. The. completed wheel , weighs about £6 pounds. A member 6r the company said, in explaining the construction of the new bike: "This wheel was built to supply a demand which we know to exist among some of our patrons for a better and moi"e eXpensive wheel than can be had on the market at present. Such a wheel we have tried to make, and I believe that another season will see many of them at the fashionable resorts." i A woman's wheel is being finished in the firm's shops. This wheel will be much more richly ornamented, and its price will be $1,000. A lantern, which is being made to go with it, will be set with precious stones and will cost several hundred dollars. am now making a discount of 10 to 25 per cent on all winter Suitings. Come in aiid we are sure we can 6ave you money. J. D. LODTZ, Jr. McHenry, HI., Dec. 4, THOS. BURKE, fplt Meat Market. Having again taken possession of my Market, in this village, I am now pre­ pared to furnish my old customers and the public generally, with Fresh and Salt Meats. Smoked Meat, Sausage, etc Of the best quality and at Living PricesJ I shall keep constantly on hand Meats of all kinds, and leaving nothing undone to meet the wants of my customers. Vegetables of all kinds in their season. FRESH OYSTES8, By the quart or can. R^rCash paid for Hides, Tallow, Veal, Poultry, etc. A share of the public patronage is re- spectfvlly solicited. THOMAS BUKEtE. McHenry, 111., Oct. 1. 1895. NEW FIRM! MURPHYTHIILLIPS, Howe Block, Water Street, DEALERS IN Choice family Srcctries, Kerosene, Gasoline, Potatoes, Fresh Bread, Tablets, Pencils, new Teas, new Coffees, etc; Bakery Supplies of ail kinds, constantly on hand, always fresh. Canned Goods, and all kinds of Fruits in their season can be found at our store, ISfHot Oyster Stews served on short notice. The finest brand , of Oysters by the can or quart. Call and see us. R&URPHY & PHiLLJPS. McHenry, Dec. 17, 1895. Halt ! Read This ! GUS. CARLSON, At his Harness Shop, near the Red Bridge, has now in stock the finest as- L llJCUt Ui Robes, Blankets ard Whips To be found in McHenry County, I can sell you a Blanket from 75c up to 05- And guaranteed as represented. < If you want to save money oali and see me. Also a fine stook of SINGLE & DOUBLE HARNESS Which will be sold cheaper than the same goods can be bought elsewhere and war­ ranted as represented. REPAIRIING Promptly Attended to. Dp not fa.il to oall at once and get the benefit of our bargains. MoHaary^lVoot^^llrf ON- MATHEMATICS AND ASTRONOMY Two Sciences That Are Closely Related and Necessary to Each Other. Probably in none of the sciences, ap­ plied or pure, is a knowledge of higher mathematics so essential as astron­ omy. Certainly none involves so much mathematical labor. The method of the least squares is one in almost con­ stant use by those engaged in astro­ nomical calculation, and the amount of labor often entailed by "this process is enough to make the head of an ordi­ nary citizen swim even to think of. One of the most extensive least sqxiare Solutions ever made, says the 1M tt^s- burgh Dispatch, hns rocpuMy lip^n pnl lis lied by Prof. Schur, of Goettingen. The heliometric triangulations of the stars in the cluster Praesepe (the Bee­ hive) gave rise to a series of 74 normal equations, involving 74 unknown quan­ tities. The solution of this set of quantities was effected by Prof. Schur in ten weeks by means of the usual Gaussian method of elimination'.' Prof. Schur comes to the conclusion that no other method by successive approxi­ mations is to be (/compared to the Gaussian method, even though it might seem to promise a saving of labor in advance. Prof. Schur mentions as the longest least square solution he has been able to find in astronomical liter­ ature a geodetic adjustment made by Baeyer, in which a set of normal equa­ tions with 68 unknowns was success­ fully solved by the famous computer. Dase, in three months. GAVE THE FISH' A JAG. This Is One Way of lieing Kntprtaining in California. "Did you ever see drunken fish?" in- quired a Sonoma county wine grower. No one would confess that he had seen intoxicated fish, and the silence in­ dicated a predisposition to incredulity, says a writer in the San Francisco Post. "I suppose you axe going to tell us about a drunken, catfish staggering down through the orchard and Catch­ ing a bird?" suggested one. '•'Do you think I am a liar?" demand­ ed the farmer, indignantly, but he was left in ignorance as to the belief of his hearers. "My winery is right on the bank of a little creek. This time of the year the water stands in pools„ and every pool is full of trout., suckers and pike. All of the waste from the winery is thrown into the creek, and that is enough to discolor the water, but the other day a big vat of sour claret burst and nearly all of it ran down into the hole of water just below the winery. In half an hour the pool was crowded with fish floating belly up. I thought they were dead, and "pulled a big pike out, but he wiggled and llopped around just like an old drunk trying to get up without anything to hold on to. One by one they disappeared as they so­ bered up, and when the Water cleared two days afterward there wasn'tadead fish in the pool. They had just been jagged." . One of Maine's Widows. There is now living in Ilartland, Me., at the ripe old age of 75 years, one of Maine's notable widows. This is Mrs. Ellen ' Phillips, relict of George, a brother of Wendell Phillips. Iler hus­ band was a graduate from Harvard col­ lege, a member of the famous class of '28, among his classmates and intimate friends being Dr. 0. W. Holmes and '"iM^nes Freeman Clark. Mrs. Phillips has in her. house several antique relics of great interest and historical value, among them beng a marble top table and drawer which belonged to John Brown, of Harper's Ferry fame, and a copper ewer and sideboard, once the property of -John Phillips, the first mayor of the city of Boston. She tells many an interesting reminiscence of Wendell Phillips, with whom she was intimately acquainted. The Great Jennings Estate. Patriotic citizens of Minnesota who have been Jed to consider themselves heirs to "the great Jennings estate" of England, are still waiting patiently for the enormous shipment of bullion from the Bank of England's vaults, which will soon put our circulation on an im­ movable gold basis. St. Paul has the' craze badly, nearly $150,000 having been collected in that city alone for "costs" j in the last few years. The collection of thjs ..has been in the hands of a regular stock company in Philadelphia, and has proved such a good thing that an­ other company has been formed in Minneapolis as a competitor. A ROOSTER IN EVIDENCE. Brought Into" Court and Placed on the Witness Stand. • . j „ -- In a stealing case which was tried in the county court- at Sylvania, Ga., a, very extraordinary witness was in­ troduced--the first of his. kind that has ever "appeared in our courthouse, says .the Savannah News, This was a dominick rooster." Two negro - boys were prosecuted for stealing chickens irom another negro. The prosecutor proved, that his chickens were missing, and he claimed to have identified ;them in tlie yard ef'the accused. It then developed on the latter to prove their • ownership. One of our brightest young lawyers was conducting the defense, and he very 'ingeniously introduced in evidence the above mentioned domi­ nick rooster, which belonged ' to the .defendants, in order-to show the sim­ ilarity in appearance between his roost- ership and the suspected chickens. This rooster was lord of the barnyard on the place where the two bovs lived, and the disputed chickens were so verv much, like him in color and other ways that no one doubted they' were his lineal descendants. The rooster, when put on the stand, began at once to crow lustily, as if desiring to proclaim the innocence of the accused, and furnished much amusement to the court. After hearing all the evidence in the ease and inspecting the rooster the judge discharged the prisoners and told the prosecutor that, while it was perhaps true he had lost his chickens, yet he was convinced they had become the prey of owls or 'possums. THE GOOD SAMARITAN IN CHINA He Would Ilave "Been Likely to Got Him­ self Into Trouble. One dark evening I was returning home from a call on one of our Eng­ lish neighbors in, Taiyuenfu, writes Prof. C. Af. Cady in Century. When not far from' oUr compound the road crossed an open space of several acres in extent. As I was finding my way along by the dim light of a Chinese lantern, I nearly stumbled over the body of a man who had fuAlen by the way. My first impulse was to take hold of the person and ascertain if help was needed: but, for same-reason- i did not, but hurried home to get aid. Mr. X was still with us, and on hearing my statement said: "Yes, 1 kj>€>w; the man. is dead, and it is fortnrfate that you did not attempt to touch the body. Should we now try to remove it, or even go to it,-we should no doubt be seen, and at once suspicion would attach itself to us, and none could tell the consequences. We might cause a riot before morning." It should be said that this suspicion would not have been because we were foreigners, for a native under sim­ ilar circumstances would likewise have run the risk of being charged with the murder. The Good Saniarita°n would have fared hardly in China-- or most likely would have been sus­ pected of doing the kind deed for some ultimate gain--while the priest and the Levite would have been accounted not hard-hearted, but prudent. ^ THANKFUL MOTHER'S BLESSING Charity's Reward--The Place Where It Is Never Cold. There is an old lady on the West side, a white-haired, benevolent-looking woman,whose GO years of life have been filled with good deeds, says the Chicago Times Herald. She is always doing good, and tlie worthy poor always find in her a friend in need. It was during the first cold snap this winter that she heard a poor widow, an Irishwoman, with four small children, who were in need of clothing to protect them from the cold. The next day, with a large bundle of clothing-, she visited the com­ fortless rooms of this unfortunate fam­ ily. The mother had gone out, but the children were there, and this old lad}-, whose charity work is of the practical sort, proceeded to dress the little ones herself, beginning with the youngest, a mere baby. She was just fastening the last button of the dress of the eldest girl when the door opened and the mother walked in. Shewaschilled through, tired, and discouraged? from her fadure to get work. It took but an instant for her to grasp the situa­ tion, and' when she looked into the kindly face of the benefactress her eyes were filled with tears. "God bless ye, mum, for your kind­ ness to my . little ones," she said, "and may ye never go to a place that is cold " "My good woman," replied the old lady, "perhaps the reason I do this is to avoid going to a place that is hot." How She Spelled It. Everyone knows how to spell "hard water" with three letters, but proba­ bly some readers would be puzzled to spell "yesterday" with six. A Cincin­ nati girl could tell them how, according to the Enquirer. She does not yet go to school, but is taught by her mother at home. The other night her father was1 hearing her spell. One word after another was suc­ cessfully disposed of, and then he said: "Now, Annie, I am going to give you a harc^ one. If you spell it correctly I'll bring you some canity. How do you spell 'yesterday?' " It was a hard one. Annie thought of the candy, and just then her eye caught the calendar hanging against the wall. Then she answered, with a smile of tri- umph: "F-r-i, yester, d-a-y, day, yes­ terday." Water 'Famine in South Africa. The South African newspapers are full of amusing incidents in connection with the Rand water famine. Soda wa­ ter at five.shillings a bottle is in general "use for culinary and washing purposes. The demand for- Florida, bay rum, eau de cologne and othl^r liquids of liko character is un precedehtedly great, and anything that can be pressed into the service of the toilet commands a fancy arice. A mixture of ammonia -'4 and lavender water "is said to yield satisfac­ tory results, and even vaseline and ben­ zine are by no means despised. A FULL DAY'S WORK. What a New England Farmer Accom­ plished. , Lest some, one should think an Aroostook farmer's life. too free and easy, the Park hurst correspondent oi . the Fort ..Fairfield Beacon giv<?s this account of an .average day's Work dur­ ing tie potato-digging season: "I went to bed at 11 p. m. with the conviction that I must get up at,.4 a, m. (Jloc'al - time). Awoke when the clock struck * 2 and dared not go to sleep again fot ' ; fear of sleeping over. Jumped out of bed at 4 o'clock, ran to tlie" barn, dressed. myself as I went, aad'fedjand harnessed four horses;, ran to the house and woke' the old woman (for good reasons farm*. \ ers' vvives often sleep with the hired girl through potato digging); ran to the spring and back twice; greased, this double wagon; mended a check rein; . c, unloaded, four barrels and a basket of potatoes and dumped 16 barrels; 5, woke up the crew; 5:30, breakfast; 5:33, ran to the barn again, got the Jiorses on the wagon and started for the factory; "6, arrived at factory, horses steaming, two acres of teams ahead of me; everybody swearing; 6:30, lit my pipe; 7, gave some o^tha boys a lesson in careless language; 8, lit my pipe again; 9, went into tho boarding house and tried to buzz the ' cook; 10, told a big yarn; 11, stole a bottle of whisky; 12:30, got unloaded, _ . full as a starch factory, and ran the horses all the way home, arriving at 1; had a row with a Frenchman and forgot to eat dinner; 2, chased four Arab peddlers out of the, field, then .1 hauled potatoes to the cellar till 7; 8, had supper, unharnessed and cared for the horses, went to the spring twico more, shoveled- potatoes in cellar till 9:30, got a chance to kiss the hired girl' twice; 10, went to bed happy. --r-1- QUEEN VICTORIA'S BOSS. i She Had One in Mrs. JIussens, House­ keeper at Balmoral. Queen Victoria has just sustained a severe loss by the death of Mrs. Mus- sens, who, from time immemorial, bad been her housekeeper at Balmoral, says the London News. Though unknown* to the public at large, she was an im- portant personage in tlie eyes nf ^x-avy- body connected with the court, as she was one of the few who had the cour­ age to "talk up" to her majesty, and even on occasion to deliberately "boss'* her august mistress. Once when the* queen wanted a certain maid to whom she had taken a fancy detailed to thft care of her own room, Mrs. Mussena remonstrated in the strongest fashion, telling her majesty that, it was quit© out of order, and she really must not spoil the servants by taking undue no­ tice of them. The queen, as usual,.' gave away, and "dear Mrs. Mussers" won the day. She was a typical per-; soiiage of her class, gowned always in black silk, lace-trimmed apron and white cap, with corkscrew curls. She and the queen were excellent friends, and her majesty used to delight in her conversation. She also stood high in; the favor of the royal grandchild-roil* who used to seek her out as s#on as they arrived at the castle. But to the, world at large she was a holy terror,, and with the servants and members of the household she was infinitely! more exacting and imperious than tha queen herself. DID NOT KISS THE BRIDE. Sooner Than Cause a Scene the Constable*. Compromised for a Small Fee., A marriage took place in the office of a justice of the peace in Columbus, O., a few days ago, and, while a most im­ pressive ceremony to the contracting- parties, it had a very humorous side: to the spectators. The couple were evi­ dently from the rural districts, says the Troy Times, and were both seem- . ingly covered with confusion at their having to stand up before the four or five present. After the form had beeni read, the blushing pair standing hand in hand, the magistrate announced in; a serious tone that, as it was the cus­ tom of the constable to kiss the bride, she would prepare herself for the os­ culation. The constable stepped bold-i ly out, and, being a good-looking young! fellow, the young woman seemed not averse to being kissed. All doubts of the propriety of the act were soon, set at rest, for the husky groom stepped before her with an air of determination upon his face that showed it was life and death with him. He gave his hands an imaginary washing and said:i "Squire, this yere lady b'longs to ma now, an' what she did afore I took her - ain't my business, but if this eonstabla is willin', I'll give him $1.50 to call it off." The server of writs signified his* assent and the jealous countryman; paid the amount, which found its way} over the bar of the nearest saloon a few minutes after the newly-married' „ pair departed. A Wise Precaution. The president of a large accident company tells this remarkable story; and locates tlie occurrence in Brooklyn:« . "Some time ago a large policy holder in my company was run .over by a trol­ ley car and his right leg painfully crushed. lie remained conscious after the shock for three minutes, durins , which time he pulled out his watch, and called the attention of the crowd to the fact that it was just 15 minutes to 12 o'clock. His policy expired at) • noon, and his foresight was rewarded by the immediate payment of his week- . ly indemnity without controversy or litigation." - '" i A Diplomatic Tutor. ( . From a French journal comes thi3 little anecdote of a tutor and his royal pupil: The'lesson was m Romaiihistory and the prince was unprepared. come now to the Emperor Caligula. . What do you know about him, prince?** The question was followed-by^a silence that- was becoming awkward, when tt was broken by the diplomatic tutor, "Your highness is right," he said, "per* fectly right. The |esS said about- thi# emperor the better.*' I VOL. 21. NO. 27. "Pledged but to Truth, to Liberty a|»d Law; No Favors Win us and no Fear Shall Awe." M'TIENRY, ILLINOIS* WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 8, 1896.