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K - _?v• . * v.; -,. * •' • -f \'. .if » -** . *% 4- A. . C,. ' jm Jt'PWPPWffPT PRPfi , May 20,1943 ., ' * <"• *%* - 8 <fr*: 'ri:; ^--J .,£ „ -"^1V"»? «.&»!-*£ Humoro ~MfrHKW'MY W AimilTW *-*• * W<1<" ' "*'• **'*" ""V*.. 3* "v ,** «1* ^#«5r#j\< V,4' ,,«• ' ,'J5^^ j£ ;,S: • • V; £ %,**-* J4 ^ *Vj »• t ^ *"• ^ 1 ,' Page Five IS" WH? S'V HV .- J i ^ •- '^' , • SO I HEAR by EARL R. WALSH Wm Fred Beller, the man whom you can jed baseball came between McHenry blame for our weather the past winter ! and Johnsburg last Sunday. % ind spring (he predicted it, didn't ie?), handed us the following: A Dollar-a-Year man came down •from Ottawa to show the local farmers what they needed. He had never on a farm and was shown a cow ith a large udder. Being an efficiency expert, he began asking questions. > "What are those things hanging1 v MownV' he asked. The farmer told him the milk came Ifrom them. "But why does she need four? That . |» a waste effort." „,A. T h e f a r m e r s m i l e d a n d t o o k t h e A^J|0ttawa boy for a walk. "One," he ' ^' ""•Wid, "ia for milk, another for cream, 4 :lhe next is for ice cream, and the "jfourth for buttermilk We are reminded of the time 01' Diz Dean was announcing a gamfe in St.- Louis last summer. Activities suddenly ceased on the diamond and 01' Diz stumbled around for an frgpJ anation to give his radio audience. The great one couldn't come right down the middle with his fast one so curved this explanation over the corner, "Folks, I can'tNtell you why this game is held up, but if you'll just stick your heads out the window you'll find out." We kno# little or iwtlihf about playing cards so will give you this story just as Geoge Bohr told it to us. Ted Winkel held this pinochle hand while playing cards in George's home: * "That's too many," said the Ottawa 11500 spades, double pindchle And 100 1 faan. "Ill issue an order freezing the i aces. Ted picked up the 3-card blind, j cream, ice cream and buttermilk! consisting of the King, Queen and | nine, but had to discard them. In.the | hand dealt to him, he had ten trump, j two Jacks of Diamonds and three j extra aces (Hearts, Diamonds and Clubs). Total meld was 1900. Tojal points added up to 2110. You can take our word for this or we'll g^t a <. faucets, and leave the jnilk one. The . .,")«ow can then concentrate on the one, A®n"*:|give more and eat less. '•V?, 4 "What's that big animal over ^T;J,\-ythere ?" * • 1 ^ "That's a bull," replied the farmer. / "It's the biggast bull in the country. I'll buy him," said the man who signed affidavit from George. Please had spent all his years in the civil j address your comments to "S. I. H." service, "and shoot him. I was told leaving the Capital the more l>ull I could shoot the better." Sign of the times: * Bill Pries put up this *ign & his Central Market this week--"George sold all the meat. Will open again on Thursday." The old saying is "let George do it." Guess he dood it all right! Jim Powers tells of having a nice mess of beans out of his garden. He doesnt say what year's garden. A Negro was sentenced to six months for stealing chickens. He muttered a blasphemous benediction as he left the court only to be called back by the judge and threatened with a longer sentence for contempt of court. "Judge," said the prisoner,, Bowling is now just a memory in McHenry.) No bowling until next fall. Schaefers' closed this week with some pretty fancy pin-bustin*. The Schaefer Rec team won a highscoring match from Elgin Yellow Cab, 2896 to 2747. Hie locals ran up a 1061 total in the third game as Ted Budil hit 259 and Bob Conway posted 241. Bob's series waa 631«ad Tad's 671. Veryf nifty! Well, the Elgin boys weren't loafing. Hulke hit 252 in the second to lead a team total of 1016. Duke Westerman's 222--607 was the shining light. In the mixed doubles, Pete and Fanny Freund again came through with flying colors. Fanny rolled nine I reckon games Sunday afternoon getting bet' you-# misunderstood me. was, 'God am de judge!' AU ah said We liked this observation "Friends this country is not going to hell, it is merely going through hell." , ^ ter as she went along. A 536 series was just a starter. She hit 235--598 with Les Adams. Then came 223--623 with her hubby, for the championship. , - Fanny and Bob Conway placed second. Hank Britz and his wife were Dr. Kreiger, popular resident of third. Bud and Pegg Kraus placed Lily Lake is on the way to? serve Uncle j fourth. Sam. We don't know what commission i*4-- the doctor will rate, but could tip 'Uncle Sam off to the fact that he was rated "A-l" and a regular fellow by those who knew him in these parts. Delphin Klapperich called to say hello. Good looking soldier! Saw John Glosson in town Monday, John looks husky. Seems like army life agrees with most of the 'boys. . - Art Jackson made a nice showing in the state meet for high school students at Peoria last Saturday, finishing in thirteenth place among a field of fifty-nine. y McHenry turns out some classy young golfers each year. Remember way back when they called golf an old man's garnet * ? Ed "Bruce" Nkkelf Is mighty proud of the high school boys who have been taking instructions in the art of handling a rifle. The boys have come through with remarkable exhibitions of skill. We undertand that there is* a new class starting, with members of the McHenry Rifle Club taking an active interest in teaching the boys. It isn't too late to enter. Hand in your entry to either Malcolm Mclntyre or Herb Freund. That's that--till the press wheels roll again. GREAT PEOPLE Life is just what you make ft, As any great sage will relate. If you choose the wrong road you will forfeit, A possible chance to be great. Now, by great, I don't mean worldfamous, For many great people are not, They're the people whose .each little kindness, Helps somebody out of a spot. The names of these people will never, In the books about history appear, But, to those whom they've aided will ever, - 9 Be a light--in the dark--shining clear. FRED GOODSIR. None Gets Away Ground beef seasoned and bft>0ed on toast catches every drop of the flavorful juices, making a good dish. Since one doesn't mention weather too freely in print these days, it might suffice to say that lack of -sunshine caused a postponement of the schedul- Pittsburgh Techide Flat Wall! PAINT Ideal For Painting Over Wall Paper. Covers In One*Coat. NICKELS' Hardware Phone 2 : West McHenry Remember to bi^ War Bonds / r. and Stamps Bat Little Real Action French Somaliland and its *Himpartant city of Djibouti--capital, port and rail terminus--have experienced changing threats but little real action in recent years. Front door for the commerce of Ethiopia, land-locked behind it, the French colony kept its garrisons alert when Italian Invaders overran Ethiopia in 1935. Late in 1939 France stationed warships and additional troops around Djibouti against the growing thr&al jof Italian troops massed on the colony's western border. FINAL ASHY, NAVY "T.o^SS. AROUND THE WORSE STILL I sure was feeling very blue-- ; . • How blue I was nobody knew. An acre plot of land I had Had been foreclosed I felt real b*d. A politician whom I knew Thus cheered me up 'cause I was blue; Said he'. "Why, as a candidate, I often lose a whole blamed state." Cross Stitch "'There! I have sewed up that cut in your arm, but you must come around next week and let me take out the stitches." "Say, doctor, if this sewing was intended, only for : a temporary repair, why didn't you use safely pins?" Be Went. Places: •1 . ' Grumbler--I never can find '|i thing In this house. 1 would certainly like to know where my hat went. Mrs. G.--So would I. You weren't wearing it when you came home last Sight. NOT IN THE CHOIR Physician--Your heart beat is poor; seek some quiet, secluded place, where you can sleep well and where no one will pay any attention to you. Patient--Er-r, doctor, 1 say, how will going to church do? City Smarty The City Maid with mild expletive Said: "That cow is a fraud, as I live; Neither buttermilk nor cream. Nor aught else, it would seem, But plain milk does the animal give." No He Didn't Banks- My dining-room is the hoitest place on earth. I wish I knew what to do to cool it. Hanks--Did you ever take a friend home to dinner when your wife didn't expect him? Transportation Dept. "Did your son learn much about anything in college?" "Oh, yes. He learned to operate an automobile so well that we have put him in charge of one of our big trucks." ' 9 OLD AS HIS TONGUE A recent re-examinatiqn of selectee* rejected at the induction station be» cause of heart br blood vessel defects revealed that- less than 3.7 per cent of the men re-examined were fit to be submitted again for induction, Col. Paul G. Armstrong, Illinois state selective service director, has announced. "Fourteen eminent heart specialists selected by the National Research Council," Colonel Armstrong said, j "were appointed as a special medical advisory board to re-examine selectees already rejected by the induction station medical officers because of heart or blood vessel defects. Under the supervision of Drs. James B. Herrick and Dr. G. H. Fenn, and with the co-1 operation of Lt. Col. E. Mann Hartlett, state medical officer for selective service in Illinois, and the local boards, this expert medical board grave 1,030 : rejectees an especially thorough ex- i amination and found that only thirty-! eight of the rejectees were considered fit enough to be resubmitted for possible induction. "Hie small number of men recommended for reconsideration speaks : highly for the high capabilities and thoroughness of the medical officers at the induction station and should serve as positive assurance to the public that any man rejected because of heart or other defects is actually ! unfit for military or naval service ac- 1 cording to army and navy physical standards. "Many people have remarked that the preliminary examination given by ' the local board doctor is not complete. Selective service regulations require that this preliminary examination be only a simple physical inspection and blood test only limited in scope. The complete and thorough physcal ex- ! amination is done at the U. S. army induction station by medical officers who are highly skilled specialists in interpreting army and navy physical standards. ! Record Production Fats, Oils Expected During *43 Production of fats and oils from domestic materials is expected to total nearly 12 billion pounds in 1943, greatly exceeding all previous records. Requirements for domestic fats and oils also will be larger than ever before, reflecting the loss of imports of coconut, palm, and tung oils from the Far East and th£ large exports of lard and domestic vegetable oils under lend-lease. The United States has shifted recently from the position of net importer to that of net exporter of fats and oils. The per capita supply of food fats and oils for civilian use in 1943 probably will be about as large a^ the average for recent years. But with industrial employment and income increasing, and with retail price ceilings in effect, the quantity demanded may be moderately larg- ; er than the available supply. A considerable reserve exists, however, in | wasted meat fat, much of which could be recovered in the kitchen ! for use in cooking. To provide a strategic reserve ! supply of primary fats and oils, the War Production board recently Issued an order restricting the use of these commodities by major manufacturers to specified percentages of the 1940-41 average use. The manufacture of butter and lard is not affected by the order. The use of fats | in the manufacture of edible prodj ucts for military use and all products for lend-lease also is unrestrict- COURT HOUSE Frank Schuring, Huntley police officer, filed £uit last week in the circuit court against Arthur and Frank Ferris of Huntley and William Hahn, John, Charles and Alice Asmus of Woodstock, asking $25,000 damages under the old dram shop act. It is set up in the complaint that Arthur and Frank, Ferris,, are joint tenants of a building in Huntley which is leased by Arthur from Frank and is operated by Arthur as a tavern known as "Little America." Also set up" Jjolwrp Charles and Alice Asmus own a building in Woodstock which is leased by William Hahn and operated as a tavern known as "Budweiser Cafe." Schuring charges that on May 11, 1941, that Hahn and Arthur Ferris sold liquor to Earl Zimmerman, causing him to become intoxicated, after which he assaulted Schuring in Huntley, causing injuries, including a broken leg. which kept Schuring from his employment for va long period of time and also creating large bills for medical care. As the result, Schuring is asking damages from the defendants in the amount of $25,000. Zimmerman is now in Uncle Sam's army. Some months back he was arrested here for being absent without leave from his company. Charles D. Page, Elgin attorney, filed the suit in behalf of Schuring. New Gaa Books Hailed to , Oar Owners by July 21 Twinly-five million car owners holding A cards and 160,000 motorcyclists will receive new gjl^oline ration books by mail under plans announced by Prentiss M. Brown, director of the Office of Price Administration. Motorists will obtain appliaction forms at filling stations or other convenietnly located places designated by rationing boards beginning about June 22. They will fill out the forms and mail them to their ration boards, and OPA expects all new A books to be majled^ out and in the hands of motorists by July 21, when the old books expire. ROBT. GARDNER NAMED 'r DIRECTOR Robert Gardner of Solon Mills, the new director from BJcHenry county for the Northern Illinois Holsteift Breeding association, was elected vice president of this gi%up at a recent meeting of the directors. Harol# Viall of Downers Grove is president of the association. ' t Mr. Gardner is one of two owner* of Holstein cows which topped the McHenry county D. H. I. A. association for individual production honors. Mr. Gardner's cow*|u^flucqfk 2160 pounda of milk and,J2«0 pound* of fat, ; lrislMttnlfij& TOmp One of fre.resohi of the moist Irish climate is found in the great extent of wet land and bog. WORD ARRIVES FROM PVT. WILLIS WYMAN, PRISONER IN GERMANY •One of the happiest homes in the county is that of the George Wymans in Crystal Lake, for on May 11 they ! were notified that their son, Pvt. j Willis Wyman, missing in Africa since J March 28, was alive and well, even : though a prisoner in Germany. j The Wyman family was first called | by the radio department of the Chi- . cago Tribune and then from a Milwaukee paper to tell them that in a short wave broadcast from Bavaria, German had been picked up in. which the following message from Pvt. Wyman was carried: "Dear Mom: I am a 1 prisoner over here in Germany. They brought me here from Italy. They are treating me fine and am getting food from the Red Cross. Please dont worry about me. Love, Willis." ^ Pvt. Wyman is known in this community, being the fiance of Miss Mabel Knox of Terra Cotta. "You must testify only to what you know; no hearsay evidence.*' "Yes, sir." "What is your age?" "I've only hearsay evident* OQ that point." ed. Factory and warehouse stocks of fats and oils, which have declined in the past two years to less than two billion pounds, are expected to be built up to about three million pounds in the next 10 or IS months. An additional 300 or 400 million pounds of fats probably will be held in reserve for future contingencies in the form of uncrushed soybeans. Private Green, M. D. James C. Green, at 32, is a Fellow of the American College of Surgeons. Before he entered the army he was a practicing surgeon at the North Mississippi Community hospital, in Tupelo, for five years. During that time he estimates he performed about 300 operations. Yet, despite his youth and professional qualifications, and despite the acute shortage of doctors in and out of the service, Green is a private in the Camp Berkeley, Texas, Medical Replacement Training Center -- learning how to make splints and apply tourniquets. He had beon turned down when he applied for a commission at Fourth Service Command headquarter^ in Atlanta. Reason: He has a rase of asthma! In Constant Demand In backward areas of India ft* services of the exorcist are in con* stant demand to drive away the evil spirits. Make the World Shiver "A man who hasn't actually seen an air raid can't begin to conceive its horrors. Some of the air raids we saw around Liverpool were 1 enough to make the rest of the world I shiver!" That's the description of aerial warfare known by Private Walter F. N. Yorston--a Keesler j Field, Miss., airplane mechanic student who already has seen overseas duty in this war. Private Yors- I ton of 139 Pearl street, Cambridge, Mass., served with the Canadian ! army's famous Black Watch High- j landers in England and Scotland for i more than a year before his release 1 to join the U. S. army. Story el Benlfieeaee "Ruth has a good heart." __ "Has she?" ;. "Yes. If her new fall hat dbem't Cost too much and her candy and matinee bills are not too big she's going te buy her mother a patent sweeper, or else a cake mixer." Plenty Echoes "When I visit^Uie Grand Canyon oi thp-y^nfcwstpo&^I realize the insignificance of man. Ever been there?" "Never. You can get the same sensation by going to a woman's club meeting." Topklck's Laundry Intriguing A Medical Replacement Training center, Camp Berkeley, Texas, topkick is busy trying to learn the whereabouts of the young woman in West Texas who received a perfectly good set of "GI" underwear, sox, and handkerchiefs, and other belongings of a soldier, from a Dallas laundry. When he finds her, the sarge will return said young lady's pale blue pajamas. This particular first sergeant, Ross Jones, Co. B, 80th Bn., MRTC, is having difficulty maintaining the demeanor of his rank since his laundry came back. Instead of his belongings he found an intriguing set of light blue pajamas, wisp-like hankies, and other dainty articles definitely not "GI." To date, there aren't any WAACs at Camp Berkeley, either. McLean House In 1891 Capt. M. E. Dunlap of Niagara Falls, N. Y., purchased the McLean house at Appomattox Court House, Va., in which Generals Lee and Grant met to arrange the terms of surrender for Lee's army. He intended to remove it to the Chicago World's fair but changed his plans and contracted with a local builder to raze the house for reerection in the District of Columbia as a war museum. The building was torn down in February, 1893. but Dunlap's plans never materialized and the brick and wood were left in a pile by a roadside. Plans of the McLean house, prepared in 1893, have been acquired by the department of the interior, and the National Park service, after the war, will, reconstruct this historic building on its original site as disclosed archeological investigation. . . Real Kick Visitor--Are you hedtd of jw»r class in school? Billy--Not exactly, but the boy that is at the head of my class in school isn't in my class in footba^. • V. ' " i --» This Is a Pa* "Why do you call that young man •Stag'?" "Because he's a dear with no dough."* Order your Rubber Stamps at The Plain dealer. (ostlvwdK rilTEGG PRODUCTION. Fl* Pi'----- , CouM Pwiltry Mni ljd 1*MM Wlwn TOO Botiofl wet be*kl " pt bo>7 quickly wjth of •oavtoirnt, tested ! IN THI for col da and breathing trouble*. Help* pf»- veot iprad; relieves bvm;iiomj. Worki fran the I nrid* te&mt fwii disorder*. r«ed alooc, or ia severe With VAPO-Si'RAY. SP»AY WITH VAPO-SPRAY Owfctftds of the birds. Rapid in tctioQ, hifh in tntitrptic 1IW bftlABt nine. Oft VAPO-SPRAY v Ltenulsiao NOW, aod be pimi. • Bolger's Drag Store Green Street McHenry .^fEver Present "There is nothing dreadful about old age--except it has no tomorrow." So Then . . . • "Going to the seashore this year?" "I think so, I've told my wife I want to go to the mountains." feit, Commentary The first 40 years of life furnish the text, the remaining 30 the com* mentary.--Schopenhauer. ^ CeDectioa of Gowns The Smithsonian institution has a collection of historic gowns worn by the first ladies of the landvfrom the Washington administrati<3TT"down to the present Roosevelt term. . Geographical Center . *fc* geological survey says W6H the geographical center of North America is located in Pierce county, a few mites west of; Devils a • . v . x , v . . > - Trade In Your Old Battery on a new We have a complete stock o! TIRES, passenger and truck. Bicycle tires and tubes. * You can now have your tires retreaded without an OPA order. Bring them in. TIES AND TUBE VULCANIZING OFFICIAL TIRE INSPECTION STATION MAIN ST., WEST M'HENRY ^ fHONE 294 » TIMELY TIPS « Ask us about *80/20 Collision Insurance for your feftr. It's popular! f Streamline your auto policy with the Medical Endorsement. Rates are low, based on your gmsoUne ration. ^ ^ Have us make a complete analysis of\ all of yottr insurance policies. It has been ^fitable^fOT' tttieri take advantage of this service. it, j • R. WALSH Phone 43 McHenry, Illinois ^WYOWWClWIfSMOe,^ Buy NATtOttAi-s vioer*tics LEMONS ORANGES GRAPEFRUIT GREEN BEANS QUAUIY CALIFORNIA LAItGt 29c 3 0 0 S I Z E • • • • • « * . 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VARIETY CEREAL KeHogg's %oi. 12c DELICIOUS-NUTRITIOUS Cheerioats 7,°!12c BREAKFAST OF CHAMPIONS Wheatio VI He FORT DEARBOR* ^ - „ N7 - Corn Flake* ; „ "£I: 8c NEW PUFFED FLAKES Kix KELLOGG*S , Pep Wheat Flakes %°J10c FIRE KING OVEN GLASS COOKWARE^ 8 PIECE SET Mly WWIi $2 Pttrcfc** at Your NATIONAL FOOD STORE ILLINOIS FLATLEAF SPINACH 21*. 2* FANCY YELLOW DOT ONIONS 3 23« BAKING NEED SAVINGS ALL-PURPOSE HAZEL HVi-i*. Qftc IAG «U ALL-PURPOSi _ Haztl Flwr TAG SI.95 PILLSBURY CAKE FLOUR SRO-SIIHR *££: 25c HAZEL Cake Flaw He VANILLA EXTRACT --• v ^ Dr. Prict't . 14c NATIONAL PANCAKE FLOUR Annt Jtmima 12c National cowl 27c National DCOFFEE JAR 30c Amer. Home Coffoo U! 24c Chase & Sanborn . BAG 30c :v': ••• - ' JUMBO SLICED WHITE LOAF Golden Grain GOLDEN GRAIN S«ler«.. ... .SS 6c rtjftv- ;*«r VICTORY TYPE DOG KIBBLED DO* FOOD Hi-Life DEHYDRATEO DOG FOOD Stronghold 2 SS 15c HOUSEHOLD NEED VALUES RAYON SAFE Supor Suds ACTIVE LATHE* Lux Soap PURE FLOATING Swan Soap PURE HATING Swan Soap BLEACH Fleecy White BLEACH Fleecy White WILBEX* S RJRNITUI No Rub 2 SSI 45c 4CAKES 25c 3CA«S29C 3CAeKdes17C ... 6,^250 Snil 15C POIISH r c r Me . BOTTLE NATIONAL FOOD STORES v.-',.