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NORTHWEST HERALD Section B Friday, August 30,1W5 Pag* 7 Nation/World \ m • Bureaucracy stymies Chinese boatbrides. A /lovely pet UPI photo Wendy Bradshaw and her father, Ted, of Eure­ ka, Mo., sit witti their pet llama inside the family car. Fernando Llama belongs to Wendy, 14, and lives in Ellisville. Fernando is about 3 f$k/2 feet tall at the shoulders and, with his long ^Shyness most common quirk i among adults ̂By Heather Hatfield ' 14 Scripps Howard News Service WASHINGTON - When Uncle -^'Freddy comes to visit, blasts into .^ the living room and demands a big hug and kiss from the children, Ju- t' lie runs and hides behind the couch. 1 " O h , i s n ' t t h a t c u t e ? " F r e d d y says. "She's a shy one, I guess," ** 'and everybody laughs. f , - : "I would suggest that there is -.'(toothing at all attractive about shy- Hfness," said William Anixter, medi- s.{ cal director at the Roundhouse • » v§quare Psychiatric Center in Alex­ ia andria.Va. * "Anybody who has been shy in t=i their life will say they hate it, they can't stand it, they're afraid of it and embarrassed by it," Annlxter Md at Healthcare Expo '85, a "."health care convention being held he* this week! ' , J ,0,~ 1 •! Shyness, Anixter suggested, is the fx most common problem among ts American adults. In a survey of V46,000 people, 40 percent said they I, .considered themselves shy. Another < 40 percent said they were shy in (heir school days, but had grown out ' of it. About 20 percent said they were not shy, except in certain situations. Shyness varies in severity. Some 'people are afraid to give speeches M while others are afraid to sign their Unname to a guest list in front of U» people. |H.-, Anixter said this "people phobia" ^-$Hild be genetically inherited, could .. .have its roots in adolescence when . .j^eer impressions are so important k dr result from early childhood '.environment. Whatever the cause, the most "harmful consequence is that shy people get misunderstood. Alfred Lord Tennyson wrote: "She wafe shy, and I thought her cold." "That is such a common misper- ception," Anixter said. Shy people are often misinterpret­ ed as being not smart, motivated or ^ ofepared. Teachers overlook them ^because they are not funny, clever . Om- interesting, Anixter said. * Shyness does not have to be per­ manent, however. The first step to £ 'getting over it is to understand the " problem. Most shy people believe * .they are hopeless and tfiey exagger­ ate symptoms: "I'm'fat, I'm ugly, I'm dumb.^.Getting rja of those personal negative perceptions u t comes first. ( 'f The second step is to practice. "Don't take a child to a Cub Scout .. meeting and expect him to make ' ' friends," Anixter said. ^" Having a shy fourth grader play 4H4th younger children will help • build confidence, the key ingredient - >for helping overcome shyness. 3 V - At the Roundhouse Center, An- V (peter puts groups of shy people to- vgether and teaches them how to k jhank, apologize, start a conversa- lion, keep one going and end one -- tilings most people learn when they j *&e young. neck, stands about 5-foot-2 to the top of his head. According to Wendy, "Fernando has been a good pet We've heard that some can be ornery. We've never had any problems." By Bruce Fienberg United Press International HONG KONG -- They came to the teeming harbor six years ago and lived on decaying boats, raising families and helping husbands make livings from the sea. But when the men took jobs ashore, the women were no longer welcome. And earlier this month 14 were sent back to where they came from. The plight of the 14, all. from coastal provinces in China, under­ scored the bureaucratic paradox of Hong Kong's immigration laws. Around 1979, the "boat brides" married Hong Kong fishermen, left China and movbd to the British colo­ ny. They lived -- with tacit govern­ ment approval -- on boats in the polluted waters of Hong Kong's Vic­ toria Harbor. The women joined more than 800 others of similar circumstance. If they were found ashore without gov­ ernment approval, they risked ar­ rest as illegal immigrants. The 14 wives came to the govern­ ment's attention after their hus­ bands gave up fishing and took jobs on land. They applied for housing, but in order to relocate they also had to apply for citizenship. In May, officials turned down the requests of the 14, ordering them back to China to apply for immigration through normal channels. "We changed jobs to spend more time with our families," said Yeung Kwai Sang, one of the husbands. Added another before his wife left: "Our life is simple and diffi­ cult, but peaceful. My family will break apart if my wife leaves." If the 14 had been allowed to re­ main in Hong Kong, it would have meant giving them special treat­ ment. Acting Deputy Director of Immigration John Yeung said there currently are some 80,000 Chinese women married to Hong Kong men who are waiting for one-way exit visas. "The (14) wives would be jump­ ing a considerable line in China," he said. For traditional reasons, it is com­ mon for Hong Kong men to marry women from China, usually from their families' home provinces. For the women, it represents ca chance for a new life... Yeung maintains Hong Kong's immigration policy is to reunite families from China with relatives in Hong Kong. But Father Francis Cumbo, a missionary who acted as spokesman for the 14, disagreed. "It is ridiculous to break up a family which is already united," he said. After several appeals, the women were finally ordered to leave on Aug. 9. Last year, 26,500 Chinese immi­ grated legally to Hong Kong. The colony tightened its immigration policy in 1980 and now routinely deports any illegal Chinese immigrant. But the machinations of immigra­ tion-policy mattered little to the boat brides. Three were sent home with the children they brought with them. Six other children, too young to be left without their mothers, also went along. Twenty-five Hong Kong-born chil­ dren, who consequently have citi­ zenship, were left with their fathers. That has placed new burdens on the men, who spend their days working as coolies ashore. Regina Ip. principal assistant sec­ retary in the government's security department, said officials in touch with Xinhua and "impression" the women would" allowed to return to Hong within several months. <T( "The Chinese authorities said they set a high priority on family reunions," she said. The women%iet with Xinhua offi­ cials prior to agreeing to leave vol­ untarily and, while not given guar­ antees, apparently realized their- best hope for reuniting their fam­ ilies was to return to China for the moment. "We cannot oppose the govern­ ment," said one. Bringing shy people out of their shells is slow, gentle, sensitive 3 <work, Anixter said. If parents can build trust and U bring a child up in a loving environ- i ment, he added, the chances of pre- li Renting shyness are greater. First fast food 15,000 fish-and-diips There -are . .shops in Britain. As one of the original ' Convenience foods, fish and chips are "sapposed to be eaten while out °n the '^street. Englishmen have been relish- ' ing fish and chips for more than 100 years, since the Industrial Revolution ,*ave rise to the first factory workers their need for cheap and quick %. CHECK LOCAL TV LISTING FOR TIME AND STATION THE 1985 MUSCULAR DYSTROPHY ASSOCIATION TELETHON Live from Caesars Palace, Las Vegas Nv V. •.