Beveridge saluted for compassionate heart -- and ear By Angela Blackburn OAKVILLE BEAVER STAFF 13 · OAKVILLE BEAVER Thursday, July 23, 2009 People love to talk and they love to try to help people. Oakville Distress Centre volunteers are asked to do neither. That's because, often, the best help you can offer is to listen -- and give no advice. That's the word from long-time centre executive director Sandy Beveridge -- and that's exactly what the distress centre does. Its trained volunteers listen. They will offer information and referrals. While Beveridge retired a few years ago, she was recently awarded the first Stella Perkins Memorial Award -- established to honour the centre's late founder in the centre's 35th anniversary year. Perkins, a long-time Oakville resident was a real people person, a gifted speaker, an inspiration to many and Beveridge's mentor and friend. "It was like a lot of things in the community, somebody saw the need for a confidential, call-in line for people in the community," said Beveridge. That person was Perkins. "We're so lucky in this community ...we always have people who see a need and step up to the plate and do Taste over 150 Items of Japanese & Thai Cuisine DINNER for only something about it," said Beveridge. The native of Scotland who moved to Oakville several decades ago, still makes her home here and still volunteers, now that she is retired. Now, Beveridge works with Home Suite Hope. Having been educated and working as an accountant, Beveridge was at home raising her children when Perkins founded the Oakville Distress Centre in the late 1970s. Beveridge, having just moved to Oakville, tried her hand at volunteering to become more attuned to her new community. As the centre grew and the need to apply for funding came about, Beveridge was asked to lend her talents to the job of applying for government grants. Eventually, she was asked if she would officially don the hat of executive director. It's a hat she wore for well over two decades and though she did wear it, she never stopped working on the phone lines either. "I thought I would give it a try and after 25 years, I was still there," said Beveridge. The centre operates with a staff of two, a dedicated board and many volunteers. Though its location is confi- Sandy Beveridge dential, it has called many places around town `home' over the years. It also changed its name from crisis to distress centre. Too many people were found to be under the impression one had to be in crisis or need crisis training to be involved -- and other such centres across Ontario became known as distress centres. The perception of having to be in crisis or having to deal with crisis, have been the biggest drawbacks over time to the centre reaching both people to call for support and volunteers to sign up for the job. In reality, Beveridge said that in her more than two decades with the centre, only half a dozen of those times involved someone who was suicidal. So what does a distress centre volunteer have in their toolkit that makes them right for the job? An abundance of patience and a calm demeanor. "I can't believe I actually received an award for doing something I love so much," said Beveridge, who, despite directing the centre, never took a break from the phone lines. While Beveridge said she loved the people she worked with, she said it was always interesting to see what was happening in the community. Distress calls proved to be a barometer of social trends. "Crisis is self-defined," said Beveridge, noting the same circumstances can be quite different to different people. The centre is there to hear from people with everyday problems. "People can call with everyday problems as they would a friend or family member. Not everyone has a friend or family member," said Beveridge. Or, there's an issue they don't relish sharing with friends or family. There is no time limit applied to calls. "We give people as long as they need," said Beveridge. Seniors are the people least likely to call the centre with a problem. Women and men call in equal proportion, but there is one thing Beveridge recalls as standing out to her. Anger. At some point she said she recognized people were quite angry. However people who call are seeking assistance, so usually, they get past the anger. Beveridge said people often have the solution to their own problem. What they need is a sounding board, someone to whom they can talk and by talking about something, organize their thoughts, gain perspective and discover a solution. Often, the problem with which someone calls the distress centre is the presenting problem, but another issue is at the root of the tension. "There are not a lot of people out there who really listen to you," said Beveridge. "Stella's biggest strength was that she was a wonderful listener because she really was interested in what people had to say," said Beveridge. Beveridge was recognized as a builder and innovator, a listener and someone of compassion, empathy and understanding, in full measure. For more information, visit www.distresscentreoakville.com, email info@distresscentreoakville.com or call 905-849-4559. $ 2499 YS A WE 7 DA ly UNCH K L E $ 15 for on 99 2345 TRAFALGAR RD., OAKVILLE For a Reservation Please Call 905.257.8188 or Visit Our Website at www.spoonandfork.ca