I Relating to Posh Spice as she tries to be fab and famous in flats That's Life Andy Juniper Guest Contributor 21 | Thursday, March 3, 2016 | OAKVILLE BEAVER | www.insideHALTON.com empathize with Posh's predicament. I feel Posh's pain. Last week, in a news ash so bright it actually trumped all other blinding ashes -- save for Donald Trump's announcement that he hates oxygen, doesn't trust oxygen, and upon becoming president, will build a dome over the U.S. to keep oxygen out of America -- Victoria Beckham announced (and I hope you're sitting down for this, dear readers) that she will no longer wear high heels. The news rocked me to my core. In case you're not in the know, like I'm in the know: Victoria Beckham rose to fame in the 1990s for wearing extremely high-heeled shoes. Oh, and also for being the member of the Spice Girls who was nicknamed Posh. And for going on to become a solo artist, entrepreneur, model, author, fashion designer, mother of four, wife of soccer star David Beckham, ventriloquist, origamist and mime (OK, I may have made up the last three). But mostly for wearing her trademark high-heeled shoes. How attached was Posh to her heels? This is the woman who was pulled over by police on a freeway and, in a subsequent media interview, feigned absolute horror. Not because she'd been stopped by the law, but because... she was caught wearing ats at the time. Personally, I knew this was coming, and not solely because ve years ago she said her doctor was recommending she surrender the stilettos. No, I knew it was coming because it happens to everyone. It's called aging. And it oc- curs in distinct stages. Through our younger years, we suffer for style. We wear clothing that really isn't made to be worn by anyone other than supermodels and mannequins: shoes that don't really t, pants that are too tight and restrictive and don't allow for things like eating. Or breathing. But we do it for fashion. We do it for vanity. The next stage? Our bodies begin to rebel. Our doctors advise us to stop torturing ourselves. And we slowly, reluctantly begin to transition into clothes that are considerably more comfortable. But, Posh, trust me: it doesn't stop there. The next step is either the most liberating, or the end of life as you know it, depending on your point of view. The next step is reached when you nally wear what you want, when you want. When comfort truly becomes king. When you (gasp) no longer care what anyone thinks. I of cially reached this point a while back. Apparently, it wasn't pretty. Late last year, I got this crazy idea that I wasn't going to cut my hair. Ever again. Trouble is, my hair is thick, so it grows wild before it grows long. I looked like Einstein in a windstorm. Further, I quit shaving because I was in my McCartney solo/bearded phase. One day, with wild hair and a scruffy face, I ran over to the mailbox to collect the mail. In my pajamas. And slippers. At 4 p.m. A neighbor saw me and joked: "Ah, I see you've given up." Given up? Wait. Is that yet another stage? I ran home, shaved and booked a hair appointment. Don't give up, Posh. You can sally forth without stylish stilettos, and be (almost) as fabulous and (almost) as famous... in ats. -- Andy Juniper can be contacted at ajjuniper@gmail.com, found on Facebook www.facebook.com, or followed on Twitter at www.twitter.com/thesportjesters. For more news, visit insidehalton.com/oakville-on. `Like' the Oakville Beaver on Facebook. Friday Night's Musical Guests: Freedom Train Hailee Rose Saturday Night's Musical Guests: Looking for direction in a volatile market? Let's talk. Marc Nutford - Financial Advisor 2387 Trafalgar Road, Unit E2, Oakville, ON L6H 6K7 905-844-4043 · www.edwardjones.com Proud supporter of the Oakville Rangers Trip Advisor's highest rated Oakville pub Dundas St. Oak Park Blv vd. Trafalgar Rd 231 Oak Park Blvd, Oakville Oak Park Blvd Chiropody Taunton Rd. The Pipes & Taps 289-863-1155 Hays Blvd (Foot Care & Custom Made Orthotics) Sore Feet/Arch/Heel? Ingrown Toenails? Plantar Warts? Hard to Cut Toenails? Corns/Calluses? Bombay Bhel Restaurant Indian Cuisine Restaurant Call Today 905-257-5628 Sigvaris Compression Stockings & Custom Made Orthotics Diabetic Foot Care & Nail Surgery 10% OFF your next visit. Mon - Thurs expiring Mar 31/16 NEW PATIENTS WELCOME Alia Ali Registered Chiropodist 2525 Hampshire Gate, Oakville, L6H 6C8 www.dundaschiropractic.com Trafalgar & Dundas, Longo's Plaza 905-829-1040 w w w. b o m b a y b h e l r e s t a u r a n t . c o m