LAUGH AND '§ LEARN, Greece has 27,000 sailors. Japan will build 14 railways. London has 60,000 telephgnes. A submarines gas stove is new. Kansas City anticipates $1 gas. Caloatta bas a snake laberatery. Russia leads the world in horses. A black fox's akin is werth $1,000. Me Indisns make blankets from bark. Caicage reperts 2,000 saloen failures. Brinsess May has ageld mouss trap." California winss gain faver in Eurepe, Ireland has 2,830,000 acres. ef bog land. American hats cest 300,000,000 a year. Germany has a railway dating from 1836. London theatres empley 12,000 persens. Great Britain makes 900,000 planes year. ee ebject to Japanese immigra- 2. Be!giam has 150,000 saleons and 5,000 Liberia yearly exports 1,000,000 pounds of ogifee. ' The Calcago-New York telephone covers 950 miles. , . Germany sends the States birds anoually. a 2 ee Tas sindbag man's business is best when ho goes on a strike. Lue soulpyor ts generally fishing for fame when ne makes a cast. Great Britain's capital in U. 8. railway® amveants to $500,000,000 Tne unicyols is expected by an inventer te go a mils in 20 seovads, A Seotch farmer has arranged to doali his Werk by an electric motor. Toe army 'worm has oeash the States mors than the Rsvolutionary war. Tho populat planis finds little dfiiculty in reulizing oa bis notes ef hand. No, QOharles Auzas, we haye never heard that yeasd would raise alde whiskers. There is enoagh iron ia ths blood of 48 men te make a 24-peund ploughshare. Neo man isas gosd as he demands the . yoone aan sball be wno arks for his daugh- 100,000 canary s 4 = Alaminium fs to be uscd on the acsoutre- ments of the Gsrman army bo deorease tho weight. ¥ ** Tam golag," ssid the old lady, "to tae e@psra. I want te hssr the new American Belladonna." Profearor A.--Whom do you regard us the grestest lingaist of thoaze? Professor B.--Mra. B. Aapeck of geld, we'giing the millleneth part of a grala may bs easliy seen by the naked oye, It ia eatimated thatiasbh year 1,285,000,- 000 bananas wore consumed in the Ualted Svates alone. Thoinner*than tissaa paper are sheeta of fron that run 4,830 to an inch, recently ' rolleSin Wales, . Since 1840 the world's productlen of meat hasincrsased 57 per cent, thas of grain 420 por cant. A new invention is an atbachment for herae's bridie, by means of which the animal may carry a lamp on its head. An Eaglish woman has employed 35 'psor Irish women since 1885 in making a copy ef an eid piece of Bayeux tapestry. In the produotion of glass jawele Han- gary leada the world. The work ts done almost entirely by the peasant olass.§ '* Always speak well of your neighbor ?" **Talwayado, although I can assure yo abe ie the meanest) woman io creation." Jack--I declare, if Miss Sears isn'b get- ting gray. Jexs--No wander, poor thing ; ahe has had so much trouble to conceal her age. : First Blokey--Did dat swat I give ye in the jaw burt? Second Blokey--What swat? Fires B.--Dat swat. Second B.--Dat's what. ' Toe Actor--I. asy, Janus, what Is the diffsrence batween a bill board and «a board bill? Aotor's Wife--Weil, yeu can't jamp the bill board. Bat ib Didn't Work. --Wiie--John, it was 1 when you came into tha house last night. Husband--And yeu were the ene I came heme te see, darling. --He, at the play, in response to apme bit ef surprising news--You take my breath away. She--So glad! You won't nesd a clove at, the end ef the act, Kasper saya that of clergymen, 42 per cent. reach 70 yeare; of farmora,-40; mer chants, 4g ; eoldiers and clerks, 32 ; lawyers, 29; veachers, 28; physicians, 24. ' There is a fitepreof covering for wal's, . cemposed of asbestos shests, softened by . steaming, embossed by rollers and dried and painted or otherwise decorated. She--Ohb, yes, I quite belleve there's a feel in every family. Don't yon? He-- Weil--er--my opinion's rather biased. Yeu see I'm the only member of our family. 'Directors of physical culture say that heavy dumbbells do mere harm than good, as they strain the heart and'lungs as 'well as the muscles they are suppesed te benefit. -**To's wm very happy Httle family, isn't it?' **Oh, dear, no! He husband is jealeus of her le, apd her poodle is jealous ef her baby, and the baby cries for its father all the time." . Biobbse--Did yeu ever know Hobbes was a tidket of leave man? Slebbs--Yor're joking, Blebbe--No, I'm not, / He used te gfve out the return checks te-the thirsty crowd atj a theatre door. Mamma--Jehnny, tee that'you give Ethel - thelien's share ef. that orange. Johnny-- Yes'm. Ethel--Mamma, he hasn't given meany. Johnny--"Well, that's all Hons den't Sat oranges. . Applicant--Then the employees of this department don't have to pase the Civil examination? Gevernment e¢fficstal --No, indeed. -We require bright, active, intelligent men forour work. . The mest 'noted shob among English Captain Wraditkens hele pre 'Quin, wife e Wy iven. She ht ; Duara has all-growa Magers from the frail shelter of a hewdah. | t la no& exactly nice fer girls to kiss one en a smite and as much astosay: "I've presumptive te the Karl of | killed: six f coated corrective, a regulator, a gen tle lax They're the smallest, the easiest to and the most nafural remedy--no reace tion afterward. Sick Headache, Bilious Headache, Indigestion, Bilious and all stomach and bowel dera: are prevented, relieved and c 'A "compe THE HEAD" py eed Headache ae 5 every trouble caused by Catarrh. Bo is Ca- tarrh itself. @ The Attacks, 'wheels Soe ¥ ane offer $500 for any case which' " they cannot cure. aby betjer do exchang.4 caresses ia public, bat gentlewemen and well-bred giris are clroumspect. "a : The Tenend ot the Secend Fiat (howly}-- I thonght you assured the lacdiord that none of your family played the pians? The Tenant ef the Third Flat--Toey don't play the piano, Why, they're all only beginning to learn now. " Tae Empress of Russia is very fond'ef the Danish black or rye bread, such ad is baked fer the so'diers. Daring Her Majesty's visits te Denmark she eats this kind ef bread every day, and when io Rassia a loaf is sent to Rassia every fifth dey. The impecusicus yeuth row diosth upen the lurcious delicacy ycleps fish ball, and indulgeth not, in gorgeous neckties and mixed drinks, fer verily the ime ap- preacheth when he must forseoth ~ pur- oe ae maiden. : ** Whatdo yeu call that thero eu ride up here on 2" asked the ron ny of the youth who etépped te ged a drink of water wt the well. 'Itisa biggole." ** Seems to me," aaid the old man, ** that I'd drother have a wheelbarrow. Wheel- barrow's something you oan elt dewn in and reat whea you get tired of pushin' the thing." Poamon:trated, Sometimes it costae hudrecs.of dollars te coavinca & man, very often lees is required, but io the cass of Polson's Nerviline, that savereizn remedy for pain, "19. foots the villand supplies enongo Noerviline te con- vinoe every purchaser thas itis the beat, most promp) and certain pain remedy in tbe.world. Nerviline is good for all kinds of pain, plessans te take, aod sure te cure Cramps and-all faternal pains. Ib is also nics Le rub ouside, fur it nas an agreeable ameli, quite uolike so maey eocher prapar- ations, waich are pieitively disagreeable to ase. Try itnow.- Gobo a stere and buy a 10 cent or 25 cent bottle. Pelson's Nerviline, Take no other, AalUngaliaat Man's Complaint. Have you ever roxord when a lady enters' ® crowded car she approaches some soft- looking fellow and stands ic frond of him ? She will never think ef taking held of a strap antil the oar is about te atep. Then she makes a spring a1 a acrsp, bud falls to catch it, And, of course, abe falls all evar her victim, and coatinues to de this until the peor failow gives up all hope of having a comfortable seat, so he.stands up and gives ths yeung lady his seat, and she takes it got youtiis time." Boys, look out for this kind of young f "4 women, Vulgar women and yirls,who don't kmow] chare ens Caristmas gifd for oae fayre | sinh cctaticiaemmmieniiiabiaietsiaianianaa Asthma Sufferers Who have in vain tried every other moans of relte' should try "Schifimann"s Asthma Care." No eattiog for resuiss. Ite action is tmmediats, direcs and cerosia, as a single trial proves. Sond te Ds, R. Sohiffmaan, St. Paa!, Mian, tor a free trial package, bat ask your dragzist first, They bad not med for years. ' Ds you remember," hs asked, "che little sapling we planted togeihsr as bey and girl !" Her eyes softened at the recollection. ** Yes," abe answered, "I remember it well" '* Trad sapling," he continued, dreamily, "must be a strong and svurdy oak now !' The softness all died oud of her eyes and conversatien Te make 1,000 cubic feet of illuminating ae eight pa of coal, hehe tbwe cents, and four gallons of n cos 12 cents, are required, "Ph ; "s The first American tin was made in Can- peoticut, in 1770. Toe laat was made by the newapaper process, at Columbus, O. DR. HOWARDS ELEGTRIC PILLS The latest and Laie 5 inventor of this lase medicines, ' POR MBN, WOMEN AND GHILDEEN, and 8 = Seen mi Vitus' Danse, sis, Ataxy, tism, tioa, Neureletyin fem A ae a ae ee oe _-- T#MONEY-MAKER KNITTING MACHINE THIS 1S GOOB FOR Si EELMAN BRO ; SENDS. s Mire. GEORGETOWN, ONT. anether en the streete er io public places. --_--o i F 3 iS 3 8: ? 1 ie fin : eh ey fl tj An old negre who had butiness ina -- { aS TBs ae wee ee = = {SBUE NO 49 1883. ~ -- | rl E a FEF sbisae: yer's office was asked ff he could sign ™ tiag Labor Aveided. -: pame. ** How is dat, sir 7" Fweddy--What the big mersengah boy **T ask," the lawyer answered, "if you | fellewing yen awound feh ? can write yeur name,?"' OCholiy--He's enn, my chwysanthe- "* Well, no, sab. I nebar writes my name, | mom foh me.--Chicago I jeas dictates it." ( There !s a Ministerial orisis in Franoe.| T)iche'c 17 res lt is said te be an secret that the Dick Ss Liniment cul Cabinet is divided against itself, and the! All Lamenessand Sprains members of Dick & Co., P! O. Box 482, Montreal, regarded it as an outrage Dupuy should demand a vote of confidencs in such a Oabinst. After a very disorderly scene, the Ohamber adjourned, en Saturday until te-day. . f _ \GASH FOR FEATHERS.§ Cut this address out and take it along witb re where you do your Do for ol feathers to the sto thers turkey feathers. i goose fea: ; to 10c 'for hen A FOR CHILDREN TEETHIN Draggtsts. HIN RUP Ps 25 Cents Guarantee, or Chest Shiloh's Poreus great satisfaction, --a5 ' joanves if you want to make mon YOU ARE. Tem Er eet BRIGGS, ments giense mention this gape. ah: ------el V Chronic | Ceughs Persons afflicted witH these or any throat or lung troubles myn resort to that ' Most Excellent Remedy, Scott's" Emulsion of Pure Cod Liver Oil with Hypophosphites of Lime and Soda. No other preparation effects such cures. é Genel peameninte ierare-of subat " muine prepared by tt ' Belleville. oid b all druggiste B0c.and $LO0" Use tt and pay if. 1 dee Atéress, YON MOHL bo. Bote Amerteas syent, Chnchemedl, --FOR SALE--- 25 Farms for $1000 each, IZ $2000 « 7 ee se $3000 ae 4. "_.« gago00 Also some weil situated properties in Chatham, Wallaceburg and Trenton. SEEMS Te SUIT PURCAASERS for particul«rs appiy to JOHN Mccoy Homilies, Ont, .M.Pieree,of WEST BAY CITY MICHICAH MICH. is agent for the cslebrated NE LANDS, in OGEMAW FRM | end ALPEN COUN LEEDS | nest Innd in the States oan be had ax low prices on il terms. VERY an one way paid on the purchases Now is.the time te get a home of PRICES, Woe Bay City, bw, Sells on AGENTS WANTED.' a To handle a quick-selling household article. sight. -Exclusive terri particulars address DOMINION SPEOLALTY Co., 310 King Street East. tory given. For Hamiiton, Ont. COUGH : EASY Eby's Gorman Breast Balsam You cough easy and soon are pured of cough... WHAT .PEOPLE AAY¥Y OF It. LOVERS of the beautiful all want eur " VICTOR COLOR PROCESS" work, New, uniqueand simple. It you want large results from trifling ent- lay, write for particulars. Co., Albany, N. Y. H. G. Braxs & ott J. Hons, Port agin, save Eby's a by lOc. "nk. tod Write medicine he has ever used. quick. no time to lose. 4. . D. F. Smith, Organiser Patrons of Maaufacturing Company, Terente. Industry, has no healta in recommend ¢ : ing Eby's Breast Balsam, . best medicine in existence for coughs and > ara Mr. Chas,.Cameron, U: ---- SSTER inic onl foals Euy's Geom Breast Balsam and re- AGENTS NTED, To eo ear on Eas commends it ° . Bernd, Cake und Farteg Rulees, Carver, and and Gelemes Salsam is an indispensable ty in ~~ his recommends it as a POCKET PENX & Crm, WITH KARE, c. vatuable remedy for hs and Caldas, : sar] Do. Put up in 359. and bottles, Ask ae low Agis.big mowey Terinah Ladies, Mother Green's Tansy Pilis. Ueed Thalmsan Manufacturing 350 Street Balto., Md. 0. 8 A < D es ONT Buy a Watch Gomi Mew Oatalogos. ITS FREE , Write for one to EB. MOWRY & Co. TORONTO Cank. S Ly thousands. Safe, Sure and Always Reli- sie. REFUSE SUBSTITUTES. From all ists or free from obser- yanion, on receipt of $1.00, Sealed particulars 3 cents. LANE MEDICINE Co., MONTREAL, Can | er CARD | etyle 'S > IT BATES THIMALL™ HURE MAM § crihe Cezcsaled 'with every Send 100. for 's denen finest and latest Mame Cards, package NS ae "Manufactured oni ly by AYID MORTON & SONS * HAMILTON,ONT. rus "STOVES AND RANGRS ANITOBA FARMS. NEAR WINNI- peg. Two to five doligrs per acre. . Why pay more? Torrens titles. Send for partie ulars or call.on owncr, F. PROUDFOOT, first door north of Post Office, Winnipeg, Man. juut.ve0 aoe seedy . uy re] for sale by theSamrr Pace CompansyY iv Minuesets. seud for & DurrrTo Rarfteoap jars, They will be sent te you REE. HOPEWELL Cc Laud Cowmissioner, 8t. Paul, Mime, T SOUVEN R" Maps and Circus Maio from ORIGINAL DESIGNS and PATTERNS, | They-are Superb in Finish. and Superior In Quality of Material and Workmanship, - They Excel in Baking Quali- ties and ine Economy -of Fuel, and Convenience. Pm ae eae Seeiete af or w -ina sites, and are therefore te thereguims mente of large or small in any pars -| thé Dominion. ' Every stove warranted. : If you ate in want of a cook stove or bags burner, don't buy until you have seen tas elegant line. "by leading stove. dealers every where, The GURNEY. TILDEN 00 : HAMILTON, ONT