Listowel Banner, 18 Aug 1921, p. 3

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» \ \ f # 5 @. « BUY THE MAXWELL and You'll Not _ ~~ Be Sorry ae ‘ ss “The Maxwell Will Do What Other Cars Won't No purchaser of the improved 1921 model--the big- gest car value on the market to-day--is other than elated) over its performance, which is the admiration of any driver who can appreciate efficiency in a motor. The fact is, the Maxwell will stand up to any reasonable test, and the one principal factor that has had most to do with making this year’s car such a favorite, is the smooth-running, powerful Continental motor, that’s splendid performance makes the driver feel as though there were six cylinders under the hood. Two Maxwell cars from Listowel made the trip last month to Quebec city and beyond, covering upwards of 1800 miles, and neither motor gave a particle of trouble, despite the fact that both cars. were heavily laden and one carried the equivalent of eleven passengers, each more than 140 pounds in weight. The car itself weighs 2100 and the load of the one, which included five passengers, tent, camp beds, suit cases, eats, etc., brought the total weight up to 3650 pounds. And with this load to pull, the engine showed up admirably, falling down at no point and taking most of the big hills on “high.” Though carrying the equivalent of eleven average size, passengers and coming through some real bad roads on the return trip down the Canadian side, the one car, travelling 1834 miles, averaged 22.36 miles to the gallon. The record of the other, carrying four passengers, - tent, equipment and luggage, over good roads to Montreal, was 32 ~ miles to the gallon. The amount of oil used was positively trifling. If you want a car that will give satisfaction, one that is efficient and good enough for anybody, no matter what his means, buy a Max- well, which at the reduced price--$1295--is the best car value on the market today. A Pleasure to Demonstrate M. F. Zurbrigg and F. Bender Maxwell Dealers for Listowel and. Vicinity : To have barred Poland from a direct, It seems strange that after Jeliberarion at the Peace Conf«rence, instead of giving full“control of: mouth of the Vistula river fo Poland, the semi-independent state of the ‘Free City. of Danzig’ was edged ‘in batween the Baltic coast and the Vis- tula basin. a5 the Republic of unham access to the sea was a political mis- take, an astonishing blunder. What has just happened during the recent Bolshevist fnvasion of Po- land, when help could not be extend- ed freely by France and America be- cause of the opposition by the Ger- man Danzig, is but a‘ striking illustration of the fact that in reality Poland has no free to the sea, no direct and uncontrolled communication with the rest of the world. For some time at least the inter- ests of a state with a population of 35,000,000 people, will be systemati- cally hampered by a few of the 160,- 000 Germans of Danzig, of those few who obstinately, in the spirit of im- perialistie Russia, will continue to work as agents of the old regime. In order to understand the full significance of what the German. grip on the port of Danzig means to Po- land, it is necessary to glance at the map. The natural waterways formed by the Vistula and its tributaries drain over three quarters of the total area of the Republic of Poland. The. Vistula is navigable beyond Cracow and in its upper course crosses: the coal flelds of Silesia and Galicia. If the Silesian coal mines and fac- tories have not yet been connected by canals, it is simply due to the politi- cal reasons of the past, due to the fact that the coal fields were divided between the Empires of Russia, of Germany and of Austria.and that the Vistula instead of being a commercial irtery was used as a pvlitical boun- tary line. Toward the east, the northeast ind the west, the tributaries of the Vistula are, and have been for many years, connected with the Niemen, the Warta, the Pripet and the Dnieper. It is possible to reach the Vistula by boat from the Ukraine, from Lith- uania and from Germany, and if the port of Danzig has not attained the importance corresponding to its geo- graphical position it is only because, in the past, the Vistula river was divided by political boundaries and because Russia systematically oppos- ed the economic development of Po- land and would not allow the water- ways to be improved. The San, a tributary of the Vistula, ‘ould in all probability be connected with the upper course of the Dnies- ter; but if not the San, the Bug could certainly be canalized, and since the detailed engineering stu- dies for a canal extending to the Zlota Lipa (a tributary of the Dniester) have long been finished and actual work begun before the war, there will be, in a near future, a waterway connecting the Baltia Sea and the Black Sea, across Poland and Roum@nia. Again a glance at the map helps to realize at once the full signific- ance of such an inland waterway and the far reaching consequences of a German or a foreign Danzig. In many cases the establishment of the new boundary lines has been based exclusively on economic ar 3trategical considerations, as North- ern Bohemia, inhabjted by a compact mass of German-speaking people, that has been incorporated into Czecho-Slovakia. The solution of the Danzig prob- lem, as it has been reached by the Peace Conference, gives, therefore, the impression of having been made in order to establish a foreign control over the commercial relations of Poland. The mouth of the Vistula is the door to Poland. The solution of the Peace Confer- ence leaves unsettled the question of possession of the key to that door. Whale of a Fish Story. At a convivial gathering in con- nection with an angling club a sailor listened attentively while the. mem- bers told of the big fish they might have landed had not their lines given way at the critical moment. The manner in which they recounted their exploits would have brought tears to the eyes of the most hardened story- teller, says Tit-Bits. But a sailor never knows when he is beaten. “Well, mates,’’ he began, “I never did any fresh-water fishing, so I ex- pect you are telling the truth. But { remember on one occasion, having nothing better to do, we cast a line at sea and awaited results. Soon we got a bite, but for the life of us we could not bring in our catch. Then an idea struck us. We fastened the line to the windlass and proceeded -to haul in, when the ‘boat gave a lurch, the line broke, and the monster escaped.” One of the company, with biting Sarcasm, suggested that it must have been a whale. “A whale, be hanged!” replied the sailor; ‘‘we baited with a whale!” “Mono-Love."” Boy—girl—a moon above, Lane—stroll—a little love, Hug—kiss—the dear sweet thing, Promise—vow—a diamond ring. Home—Jetter—a gather of clothes, Window—ladder—down she gees; Lover—auto—away they sped, Minister — sermon — then they’re wed. Station—train—they go into town, Money—house—they settle down; Year—doctor—full of joy, Wail—yelp—a baby boy! Flowers In Sweden. Swedish women of all classes are particularly fond of flowers, and in proportion to its size and popula- tion, Stockholm has more fiower any other European city, eas | islands, f jp east he ante E a 3 eed ~ ~ - as Ee ie . it = ars " a 3 , “BULL! is supposed to be the and a typical instance of “a ludicrous inconsistency ‘or blunder in speech” (as the diction- ary describes a bull”) is afforded by the following: ea Irish farmer, coming home from market, was asked how he had sold his pis) He replied, “Well, I didn’t get as fruch as I expected, but T didn’t expect I would.” Many people without Irish blood in their veins, however, have per- petrated ‘‘bulis.” Members of Par- liament, clergymei .and novelists have all been guilty of “‘inconsisten- cies in speech." The Archbishop of York equalled the “bull” quoted above in a rather more delicate manner when he re marked, “There are signs that peace may come sooner than we expect.” _ Mr. James Sexton, M.P., is credit- ed with the following: ‘“‘When shall the lion of autocracy walk hand in hand with the flood gates of democ- racy?” while Mr. Adamson, the Labor M.P., not long ago besought the Government not “‘to act in such @ way that the mines would millstone round the neck which threatens to engulf us.” . Another M.P. stated in the British House of Commons: “The right hon. gentleman has been laboriously AMragging a red herring across the path, but I beg to tell him, Mr, Speaker, that it has missed fire.” Referring to writers, the following gem appeared in an Irish paper: ‘“‘On last Boxing Day some of the public- houses were closed and some remain- ed open. This year, it seems, the very, reverse is the case.” An amusing “bull” was made by Mr. J. R. Mecredy in a written de- scription of a tour in France. He remarked that “the river which flowed through the town was bone dry." Among noveiists, Mr. W. J. Locke has put one of the best specimens of a “bull’’ on record. In his novel, “Derelicts,” he states, “The old man had gone to Exeter to bury his sis- ter, his only surviving relative.” The witty pointed remark is the opposite of the bull, and may aptly be termed a “‘buli’s-eye."” An enter- taining selection has been coflected by Mr. J. C. Percy in his book “More Bulls and Blunders.” One of the best examples of sting- ing repartee is afforded by a reply given by Jack Towers, a noted char- acter of his day, to the Prince Re- gent. The printe was in Portsmouth, and seeing Towers across the street, shouted out in his royal way, ‘Hal- loe, Towers, I hear you are the greatest blackguard in - Ports- mouth?” Towers replied, with a low bow, “I hope your Royal Highness has not come here to take away my reputation.” Another instance of the repartee of that period is preserved in the famous reply of Wilkes, a politician and editor. Wilkes was whistling “God Save the King," ‘and the Prince of Wales asked him, “How long have you taken to that tune?” “Ever since [ had the honor of your Royal Highness’ acquaintance,’ was the brutal answer. In later days Mr. Black, editor of the Morning Chronicle, was the vic- tim of a stinging rebuke from Lord Melbourne, then Prime Minister. Black had been attacking the Minis- ter in his paper, and, meeting in Pall Mall, the two inquired after each other’s health, Mr. Black explained that he was suffering from a bad cold. “Ah, Mr. Black,’ Melbourne, “you have been lying between damp sheets.” Of Sir John Irwin, a man famous in Georgian days, the following story is told. One day when Sir John was suffering from an attack of gout, his doctor called, to find him crack- “These pipes of Madeira will be the death of you; they are tle cause of all your suffering.”” ‘“‘Weli, then,” responded the victim, “‘all your glass, for now you have found the cause, the sooner we get rid of it the better!” Japanese English. ; Of the eagerness of the Japanese to learn English Mr. DeBurg Daly in “An Irishwoman in China’ gives an amusing account. She says they will pounce on you at railway sta- tions and on steamers and insist.on talking with you in order to prac- tice the new tongue. Sometimes the questions they ask are odd enough. A Japanese clerk accosted a tall, dark missionary in these words: “Sir, or madam, as the case may be, what is your name?’" And Mrs. DeBurgh Daly says she has bei? told that a placard was exhibited Um % lit- tle Japanese house, setting forth tha “English is taught here up to G.’" The house coolie at the hotel sal to her, with a polite bow,, ‘Will you have some hot?" “I discovered that he meant to ask whethet I wished the steam heat to be turned on!” adds the writer. Tercentenary of the Potato. In 1621 the governor of the Ber- mudas sent to the governor of Vir- ginia, two. large cedar chests in which were plants and fruits and vegetables, known to the coral but not to the mainiand. This event will be celebrated next December, for the potato was one of the best contributions. i Distribution of Bible. During its existence of more than a century the Briti and Foreign Bible Society in London has distri- bute approximately 25,000,009. PEE ns eee Sea a yo te tea cop of the Bible printed in moré than 400 languages and dialects, “|... birthright of an Irishman, — ing a bottle of wine. Said the doctor, nme a

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