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Lo®, P Ied There are people who will double up with merriment when they see some one else fall down a flight of steps, and afterward describs it as ‘"the funniest thing they ever saw,‘"" but most nervous patients probably would not laugh at all if ir erder to effect a cure an attempt were made to excite their hilarity by throwing relatives and servants down stairs. Nerve specialists who adopt the laughter cure will have either to practise clowing or keep trained fools to set their patients ‘"in a roar." When one comes to think of it, says the Lady‘s Pictorial, few things make one laugh to this exâ€" tent, and what is one person‘s meat where hilarity is concerned may prove so poisonous to another as to plunge him to the very depths of depression. Miss Keenâ€"Quite true. i’gung‘g-z; men aren‘t balf so fresh after they| al gut martried. § lAf One cannot well sit down and laugh ‘"‘till the tears run down the heeks‘‘ at nothing at all, however ‘nxious to cure a severe attack of neuralgia. Idca All Rightâ€"Trouble is to Get Prescription Filled. It is all very well for a German doctor=to prescribe hearty laughâ€" ter as a remedy for nervous disâ€" eases, but perhaps he will also be good enough to tell us where we are to get the ingredients for his prescription. Mr. Highbrowâ€"It was Michelet, I believe, who observed that "woâ€" man is the salt of a man‘s lift." 'port the opposition to the reformed spelling. The simplifiers will have to reckon with the new line of arâ€" gument, a line that is aggressive rather than apologetic. & _jA'rnothergroh'nd for opposition to aplification in its effect on our classical literature, on our glo= ous, inheritancé +> paetry, drAma, fiction. Chaucer belongs to the few, largely because of his arch‘c spellings. _ Would bhe classics su.â€" fer revision? Publishers would hardly venture to give us Shakesâ€" peare in the revised form. And the alienation of literature from lively speech would be a calamity. The separation of the written lanâ€" guage from that of current use, of the market place and ephemeral publications, would. make neither for culture, democracy nor for furâ€" ther growth of language. For one, Professor Eastman proudly claims that sound theory and the deeper interests of literature and art supâ€" Professopr Max Eastman, in an larticle in The North American Reâ€" view on "Why English Does Not Simplify Her Spelling,"‘ brilliantly states the case against the proposed revolution. Aesthetic judgment, he well says, has been the sovereign power in developing the English tongue, and the "true treasurers" of it "have been and are the knowâ€" ers of its immediate beauty.‘"" Foreign scholars marvel at the wealth, variety and power of our language, but these qualities have their priceâ€"complexity. An inâ€" finite number of combinations, apâ€" parent eccentricities, diversity inl form are essential to linguistic riches, and no artistic people is lever satisfied with a mechanicaliy! perfect instrument. Superfluous or illogical letters may be due to analogies, to real or fancied, conâ€" gruities between words and ideas. ‘‘Buzz"" is better than "buz‘"‘ and ‘‘thumb‘‘ is better than ‘"thum‘‘. to the artist in words, and to take{ away the silent letters is to rob him of pregnant suggestions, as‘so-i ciations, shades of meaning. There are strange words, unique words in} the language, and to force them. into catezories for the sake of regu-‘ larity is to devitalize and disfigure them. _ Whocan think of ghosti stories of literary merit without. the "h" in gshosts ? ‘ _ The carnest and abla simplifiers ¢f our spelling believe that preâ€" jadice alone stands in the way of the complete success of their cause. The sneers and insults that some supercilious people have leveled at them justify to some extent this view, but of course it does rot cover the whole ground. There is an opâ€" position to simplification that is as enlightened and as respectable theoretically as ‘the most scieatific argument for the change. One may be practical, cognizant of historiâ€" :al propriety, appreciative of reâ€" Zimmd economy, and at the same time be utterly averse to simâ€" plification "with an ax ‘‘ THE MERRY HAâ€"HA CURE. CEURRENT TOPICS. ONE RESULT jal to lAfrica,. The majority of the members of the icelandic Parliament are anxiâ€" ous that the ties that bind the isâ€" land to Denmark shall be severed. Italian election returns so far in indicate that the Government has been retained by a large majority. Dinizulu, King of the Zulus, has been sentenced to four years in prison for harboringâ€"rebels. Three hundred and eightâ€"four persons are on trial at Moscow, acâ€" cused of conspiring to loot Russian railroads. A series of avalanches in the Austrian Province of Carinthia have swept away houses in a numâ€" ber of villages, killing ten people. Spain fears that the agreemént between France and Germany reâ€" garding Morocco may be detrimentâ€" Detroit‘s lake passenger fleet will be equipped . with wireless telegraph apparatus when navigaâ€" tion opens. 2e 3. Practically every coal operator in Western Penusylvania has petiâ€" tioned for reciprocity in coal with Canada. President Réosevel@ has received a present of a goldâ€"hilted, jewelled hunting knife, costing $1,250. __ Imports into New York for Febâ€" ruary last show an increase of nearly $19,000,000 over the same month last year. The Canadian waterways treaty was ratified by the United States Senate on Thursday. A Boston man _ has invented a machine for generating electricity from the sun‘s rays. The Pennsylvania Railroad‘s reâ€" port shows a decrease of $7,426,â€" 297 in net earnings for 1908. William H. Tait was sworn in at Washington as President of the United States, on Thursday. Mr. Sceott Dickson, Unionist, carâ€" ried the Central Division of Glasâ€" gow against the Free Trade canâ€" didate by a majority of 2,113. Mr. Birrell, Chief Secretary for Ireland, says President Taft, in his inaugural address, pronounced the doom of the hope for the disarmaâ€" ment of the nations. Mr. George Meredith, the noveâ€" list, says women will yet win the suffrage, though not by militant tactics. Mr. Arthurâ€" Dewar, Solicitorâ€" General for Scotland, was returned as member for South Edinburgh in the British Commons. At the Mining lInstitute meeting at Montreal President Miller statâ€" ed the total mineral production of Canada last year to be $87,323,848. After jumping the track near Hartland, N. B., an engine rolled over three times and landed in the river. The engineer and fireman went down with the engine, but escaped unhurt. __ Sss in Brita,in' exnserioncesd lask waolk the n@®s#iest snowfall since 1881. The Daylightâ€"saving Bill passed the second reading in the \ritish House of Commons on Frid3y. â€".arge quantities of diseased meat from the United States were reâ€" ceived at the port of London. It is rumored at Montreal that the Government will lend_ the Grand Trunk Pacific $10,000,000 to tide them over. Miss Beanlands, a teacher at North Bay, was very badly burned by her clothing taking fire from a spirit lamp on Saturday. add britain John Welch, who was serving a life sentence at Kingston Penitenâ€" tiary for attempting to blow up the Welland Canal, is dead. A special civil service examinaâ€" tion under the new act to fill vaâ€" cancies will be held on the 30th inst. & Manitoba Retail Merchants‘ Asâ€" seciation is applying for power to organize a mutual fire insurance company. A bar of gold was stolen from a dentist‘s offfice at Portage la Prairie, and a_ society woman is implicated. The spring rush of immigration bas already started, and large numâ€" bers of immigrants will arrive at Halifax this week. The C P. R. is plannaing large extensions to the Win\dsor Street Station at Montreal. Two hundred men have been laid off at the l oint St. Charles shops of the Grand Trunk. The mechanical unions of the Canadian Northern Railway have completed their federated organizâ€" ation at Winnipeg. Under the new tobacco act a conviction was registered in Toâ€" ronto against a man who gave his sons cigarettes. . $ bt. Thomas policemen have reâ€" ceived an invrease in pay. 2 A snowfall of eleven feet was reâ€" corded at Quebsoc this winter. GONDENSED NEWS ITEMS Telegraphic Bricfs From Our OwU and QOther Countrics of Recent Events. HAPPENXNINGS FRGM ALL OVEX THE GLOBE. Spanish interests in North UNITED STATES. GREAT BRITAIN GENERAL CLNADA House of John McNeil at Florence, C. B., Gutted. A despatch from Halifax says: The house of John McNeil at Floâ€" rence, C. B., caught firse atâ€" 11 o‘clock on Wedsesday, and two children, a boy and a girl, aged two and three years, respectively, lost their lives. The facher was at work in a pit and the mother went out for a few minutes. When she reâ€" turned she found the house on fire and filled with smoke. The. chilâ€" dren were found in a corner, suf focated and psartially burned. The fire had orisinated in a lounge. The house was gutted Lindsay Constable in Hospital in Sorious Condition. A despatch from Lindsay, Ont., says: At one o‘clock on Thursday morning Constable John Short was beaten most unmercifully by o gang of five men, and as a reâ€" sult is now in Ross Memorial Hosâ€" pital. Foremost among his assailâ€" ants was the notorious Michael Carlin, who has already served terms in Kingston Penitentiary and Sing Sing Prison. The order was given by the officer to move cn, when Carlin, it is alleged, proâ€" ceeded to attack the constable, asâ€" sisted by his pals. The officer had cnly his baton. The men left him, as they thought, in a state of inâ€" sensibility, but he managed to give the alarm. Picked Up on Hamilton Strect With Cardy Stuck in Throat. A despatch from Hamilton, Ont., says: On Wednesday evening, as ar unknown man was walking on Cathcart street, he noticed a little girl on the sidewalk, apparently in great pain. Picking the child up, he saw that she was black in the face and apparently choking to death. Without waiting to enquire who she was he hurried her to the City Hospital, where it was found | that a piece of candy which she ’ha,d been sucking had become lodged in her throat, and that life ‘ was almost extinct. She was hurâ€" ried to the operating room, and an | operation was performed, but in spite of all that the doctors could do for her she died. Later in the evening the child was identified as ‘ Annie Grifin, the twoâ€"yearâ€"old _daughter of Mr. and Mrs. Griffin, 134 Cathcart street. Tenement House Holocaust in New York. A despatch from New York says : Cut off from escape by a burning stairway, ten persons met death early on Wednesday in a fiveâ€"story tenement house at 374 Seventh avenue. The victims, who were all Italians, with the exception of an unideatified Frenchman, ranged in age from eighty years to an infant girl of four. There were about thirty families, mostly Italians, in the tenement house, and policeâ€" men and firemen rescued many of them by ladders, and by stringing them across from windows to neighâ€" boring buildings. _ Several babies were thrown from the windows and caught by firemen who were standâ€" ing on the extension ladders. Found in the Courtâ€"yard of Spanish Palace. A despatch from London says: The Madrid correspondent of the Telegraph says that what was proâ€" bably a spherical bomb, with a lighted fuse, was found at two o‘clock Tuesday afternoon in the courtyard of the Royal Palace. It was later removed to a laboratory, where it was examined. The_bomb exploded a few moments after the examination had ended. The inciâ€" dent created the NMA (fisonisting impression. &8 Ifonso and Queen Victor:a are now at Seville, but exâ€"Queen Christina and other members of the Royal family are living in the palace. The greatest secrecy is maintained regarding the affair. It is understood that some arrests already have been made. The intention of the Government is to enter into a new contract with the Allan Steamship Company for a fifteenâ€"knot service, replacing the present twelveâ€"knot service. The new fast service is designed to meet the increase in trafuc probable upon the ratification of the new Francoâ€"Canadian treaty. Hon. Mr. Brodeur Gives Notice of _ Subsidy Bill. A despatch from Ottawa says: Hon. Mr. Brodeur has given notice ot a _ resolution empowering the Government to enter into a conâ€" tract for a subsidized line of steamâ€" ships between Canada and France. The aggregate amount to be paid is not to exceed two hundred thouâ€" sand dollars per annum, and at least fifteen round voyages must be made during the year, with the subsidy rate of $6,666 per voyage. BADLY BEATEN BY A GANXNG. BOMB FOR ROYAL FAMILY. TWO CHILDEREEN BURNED. TEX LOST THEIR LIVES. STEAMSHIPS TO FRANCE. CHILD CHOKED TO DEATH. Fiorce Blaze in Premises of London Engraving Company. A despatch from London, Ont., says: A fire which started early on Tuesday evening in the premises of the Roberts Engraving Company gutted a part of their plant and the flood of water required to put out the fire, which buraed fierceâ€" ly, did considerable damage to cther floors in the building and some slight damage to the offices of The Free Press next door. Sevâ€" eral cans of acid which exploded made the fire a dargerous one for the firemer. Terrible Work of a Tornado in Arkansas. A despatch from Brinkley, Ark., says: Thirty persons were killed, fifteen to forty were injured, and more than $1,000,000 in property loss was caused by a tornado which swept the city on kMonday night. The business section is in ruins, and nine out of every ten residences were destroyed. As the day proâ€" gressed relief parties found the dead bodies of many negroes unâ€" der the debris. Grard Truak Reduces Car Shkop Staff at Londos. A despatch from Lordon, Ont., says: Filty mea were laid off at the Grand Trunk car shops on Wedâ€" neâ€"day morning. The move is only temporary sccording to Superinâ€" tendent Treleaven and those laid cff were practically all unmarried mea. ! When a champion rifle shot fires \blindfolded at a wedding ring, ora ‘penny held between his wife‘s ‘thumb and finger, or seated back to |her shoots, by means of a mirror, ‘at an apple upon her head or on a fork held in her teeth the danger of using a bullet is obvious. None, of course, is needed ; the explosion is enough, says the London Titâ€" Bits. The apple is already preparâ€" ed, having been cut into pieces and stuck together with an adhesive substance, and a thread with a knot at the end, pulled through it from the "wings‘‘ so that it flies to bits when the gun is fired, is "how it is done." Terrible Death of a Woman With Fractured Leg. > A despatch from Halifax, N. S., says: With a hip broken and anâ€" chored to her bed with a heavy weight, used to keep the broken limb in place, Mrs. Wm.â€"Bell, of Wallace Ridge, was burned to death on Monday. Neighbors had been in the habit of seeing that she was fixed up for the night, and one of them stayed with her, but through ome misunderstanding no one stayed on Monday. Her house is some distance from the neighâ€" bors, and, after the flames were seen, help was some time coming. She was dsad when found. ~In these exhibitions ~tome of the rifle ‘‘experts‘‘ invites gentlemen fv{gm the audience to testify that the EJ M we B O 3 A 2 x 1 ridgl(; shown looks very x gbe\car‘li-v is~a shell of thin wax blackened to resemble a leaden bullst. It would pot hurt a fly. > ns In most instances where a ball or other object has to be broken on a living person‘s head blank cartâ€" ridge is used and the effect proâ€" duced by other means, as so naiveâ€" ly admitted by Mr. Graydon. _ A special wig with a spring concealed in it worked by a wire under the clothes is generally used, the conâ€" federate manipulating the spring simultaneously with the firing of the rifle. As the ball is of extremeâ€" ly thin glass a mere touch suffices to shatter it. Another popular trick is that of snuffing out lighted candles. Half a dozen are placed in front of a screen in which as many small holes are bored, one against each candleâ€" wick. At the moment of firing a confederate behind_ the _ screon sharply blows out each candle with a pair of bellows. This trick was accidentally exposed one evening by a too zealous assistant. The lady in the gallery pulled the trigger but the rifle failed to go off ; the candle, however, went out just the same. A favorite but simple trick is the shooting from some distance at an orange held in a lady‘s hand. Great applause is invariably forthcoming when the bullet drops out on her cutting open the fruit. 1t is insert ed by hand earlier in the evening. Generally the more dangerous a feat appears the more carefully is all danger guarded against. In the ‘William Tell"" act the thread_ is often tied to the assistant‘s foot. When, again, the ash is shot off a cigar which the assistant is smokâ€" ing, a piece of wire is pushed by his tongze through a hollow passage in the cigarâ€"thus thrusting off the ash at the moment of firing. The Wiliam Tell Act and Snuffing Out a Candle. SECRETS OF TRICK SHOOTING. ACID EXPLOBDED IN FIRE. DIED FASTEXED TO BED. THIRTY WEEE KILLED. FIFTY MEN LAID OFF. New York Central Will Buy 5,4860 Tons of Rails. | ‘_A despatch from New York says : The New York Central Railroad announced on Wednesday that iti had arranged to buy 101,000 tons of steel rails for 1909 delivery. This: it the most important contract placed with the steel companies since the rate war began. The order. includes 20,000 tonsâ€"alreauyâ€"delivâ€" ered to the railroad. The remainâ€" ing 81,000 tons will â€" be delivered between now and August 1. The 51,000 tons of the order, the United States Steel Corporation, 42,600 tons; the Algoma Steel Company cf Canada, 5,400 tons, and the. Bethlehem Steel Company, 2,000 tons. Not a Holiday, But DBue Solely to Health Reasons. A despatch from London says : It is officially announced that King Edward‘s forthcoming trip to Biarâ€" ritz is not a holiday, but is due solely to reasons of health, his phyâ€" sicians having in 1908 strongly urgâ€" ed him not to spend March and April in Great Britain. tc see any particular jeopardy in an occasional lapse of virtue â€"in other words, because we expect to Whole Village Was Destroyed Near Jerusalem. A despatch from London says: A ftelegram received here from Smyrna, Asiatic Turkey, on Wedâ€" nesday, says that the village of Masran, near Jerusalem, has been destroyed by an earthquake. One hundred and fifty persons are buried in the ruins. It is an almost incredible old tale. _ But for some presentâ€"day transactions which retell it we might incline to deny its truthâ€" fulness. I knew a man who trafâ€" ficked away his greatness for a morphine needle. The question once lay between a few moments‘ ease from pain and a lifetime of honor, and, like his ancient proâ€" totype in seripture, this modern Esau let go the greater for the less ; sold his birthright of eminence for a mess of Of course we do not really inâ€" tend to give up the greater for the less. I have always fancied that Esau thought he would continue to be his father‘s favorite son. It is because we de not expect an act of business treachery to affect our permanent standing, because we count on being just as good men after a gambliag debt or a season of selfâ€"indulgence ; because we fail Galician â€" Lumberman Killed at Sandidands, Masitoba. A despatch from Winnipeg says : Irvestigation by the police of the circumstances _ surrounding _ the death of a Galician lumberman named Ivan (Czewski, whose body was found near the cordwood camp at Sandilands on Tuesday with his throat cut, shows that the deed was coldblooded murder, with the object of robbery, as the dead man had his winter‘s savings in his posâ€" session. He had a wife who lives on Jarvis avenue, this city. Servia Has Withdrawn Her Deâ€" mand on Austria. A despatch from London says : It was learned conclusively in London on Wednesday that Servia, in actordance with the advice of the powers, has withdrawn her deâ€" mand for territorial compensation ai the hands of Austriaâ€"Hungary. The semiâ€"official news published in Vienna to the contrary is therefore erroneous. _ _The question of the autonomy of Bosnia was not raised in the representations made by the powers at Belgrade. It is believâ€" ed that this decision on the part of Servia foreshadows an carly and peaceful settlement of her difficulâ€" ties with Austriaâ€"Hungary. A birthright for a mess of potâ€" tageâ€"so reads the story. All that it meant to be the eldest born was sacrificed for a bowl of lentils. The savory steam of a present advantâ€" age shut out a vision of future glory. A sucenlent dish looked bigâ€" ger than a farm.â€" Esau was deâ€" feated by an appetite; sold out for a mess of pottage. And Esau said, Behold, I am at the point to die . . .and he sold bis birthright unto Jacob.â€"Geneâ€" gis &xv. 32. A Plain Talk on the Issue of Birth right or Pottage THE SPIRIT OF UNFATMTH KING‘S TRIP TO BIARRITZ. MURDERED FOR MONEY. BIG ORDER FOR "8S00." EARTHQUAKE IN E DOUBTEUL POTTAGE. PEACE IS ASSURKD. 1A ST. United States officials at Ogdensâ€" burg and Watertown claim to have discovered an underground route by which white slaves are importâ€" ed into the United States from Canada. 8 Verseâ€"31. The story of the conâ€" version of Paul is passed cver at s 94 4 E. ts fubs. t9, s Jakige wogin the second division of the Acts.â€"<<c> work of St. Paul. To dwell on that great event here would interrupt the course of the history, and is especially fitting in connsction with the beginning of his careor. THE SUNDAY SCHOOL Lesson XI. Aeneas and Doreas,. Golden Text, Acts 0; 34. 36. There was at Joppa â€" The modern Jaffa,, nine or ten miles rorth of Lydda, the seaport of Jerusalem, having at present eight thousand inhabitants. _ A certain disciple named_ Tabithaâ€"This in Syriac, the common language of the region, means splendor, beauty. Called Doreas (Gazelle), which in the East was a favorite type of beauty. § The spirit of Esau, then, is the spirit of the moment. It is an unâ€" healthy opportunism. It lives not oaly by the day, but for the day. Esau_ constantly exaggerated the value of impulse.. He was the sorb of citizen who would have cheated his creditors out of 75 per cent. and then written a generous check for charity. ‘‘When I want a drink Ltake it," said a friend in _ my hearing. But it doesn‘t take much wit to live ky that law. Surely a man would be a fool to take a drink if he did not want it. But not to take it, though he wants it ever sc muchâ€"that 32. Peter passed throughout all quarters.â€"Peter‘s first home misâ€" sionary work was in connection with John in â€" Samaria (Aets 8). They both returned to Jerusalem preaching in the villages of Saâ€" maria on the way. Now we find Peter again on a gospel tour throughout Palestine, preaching the gospol, and healing the sick, as his credentials, and as illustratâ€" REQUIRES THE WHOLE MAN. as his credentials, and as illustratâ€" ing the spirit and nature of the Gospels; visiting and encorraging and teaching the new churches formed by the persccuted Christiâ€" ans, and keeping them in touch with the apostolic church in Jeruâ€" salem. 37â€"43. The disciples. at Joppa learning of_Peter‘s presence â€"at Lydda, sent for him to come withâ€" out delay, apparently with some hope that the unseen Master would work through his disciple Peber a miracle of restoration such as he himself had wrought during his earthly life. Peter went, and like his Master at Capernaum, (40) pub them all forth. Then he kneeled down and prayed. Then, with asâ€" surance of an answer, he, turning ._. . _ to the body, said, Tabitha, arisC. 41. Gave her his hand, to help her up after she was alive. Jesus took Jairus‘s daughter‘s hand beâ€" fore she was restored. 34. Jesus Chi ttâ€"That is the Mesâ€" sizh. Peter guards against being thought the source of the healing. He draws men not to himself, but to the Saviour, and shows that Jesus is still doing the same kinds of work he did when he was living on earth. So the true preacher or teacher always draws attention not to himself, but to his Lord. eat the pottage and still retain the birtbhright when all is said and done that we repeat the old transâ€" action. â€" No man, however, can have his cake and eat it, too. Noâ€" thing is got excert by the sale of something else. & 2. But the spirit of Esau is, most of all, the spirit of unfaith. _ He sold what he could not see for what he could see. He traded his birthâ€" right because the birthright was a farâ€"off possession. It is so still. Each man must devoutly believe in the worth of an inheritance of honâ€" cr and truth. Only as he comes back from fiesh glimpses of such values is he safe in the presence of Jacob‘s succulent pottage. Such is the office of faithâ€"toâ€"hormâ€"us firm. _ The principle is the same whether for the laying of a cable, the fighting of a battle or the savâ€" ing of one‘s soul. 33. Aeneasâ€"YVery nearly the same name as Virgil‘s hero of Troy. Eight yearsâ€"Showing that the cure was miraculous. Sick of the palsyâ€"Palsy is a cantraction of the word * ‘paralysi=" INTERNATIONAL LESSON, MAR. 14. GECRGE CLARKE PECK.