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â€" antionts Cure «Came, now, boys,.. said the teacher. ‘"‘Think, when you are all in bed and asleep, what is the black object that comes in the dead of night, crawling along the passage and creeping gradually _ up the "I think, sir, I should leave that entirely to Mrs. Bullion." £‘Oh, that, sitr,‘ answered the pleasant young fellow, ‘"Iâ€"I leave that entirely to you, Mr. Bullion !"‘ The teacher had been giving his class an object lesson on the beetle. When the lesson was over he asked if anyone could give him a descripâ€" tion of the insect. For a few minutes there was siâ€" lence. » stairs EqV dNO EWE !* % woman, aged seventy ? MB P1 9P emlmae es l X& woman, aged seventyâ€"four, who was sentenced to twelve months‘ imprisonment at the London Sesâ€" sions recently for stealing two skirts from a shop in Edgware road, was stated to have spent fortyâ€"two vears in prison. "*AUm! And what is the amount of your income !‘ And what kind of z1 affair is it going to be? Do you want it dope in style, or would rou prefer it to be a quiet show ?" The young man considered for a moment. Then he said : CSp know, sitr." said a little boy *"That‘s my father."‘ S ‘Bhat, replied ihe tackivl young man, "I shall leave entirely To Mamy."" . . _ ‘_ .93 quickly stops coh}l?sf cures colds, heals the throat and lunds. â€" â€" = 25 cents. When the. health is run down from any cause whatever, a tonic is needed. A feeling of weakness, poor appetite, loss of breath after slight exertion, indicates that a comgiete breakdown is near. Someâ€" times theso troubles are due to overwork or worry, or again they may be due to the after effects of fever or some wasting illness. But what ever the cause the trouble should not be neglected, and for the purpose of gaining new health and new strength there is absolutely no better medicine than Dr. Williams‘ Pink Pills, which fill the veins with new, rich blood, which tones and strenigthens every nerve and every organ in the body. Mrs. Rose A. Bmith, Roblin, Man., says: ‘"‘Some years ago I had a severe attack of typhoid fever. When I recovered sufficiently to be able to get about I found that I was not able to gaâ€" ther up my strength. ~ I tried tonic wines and other medicines, but without avail. For months I could hardly go up stairs. and if I took a walk I was always obliged to take & friend with me to help me home again. A doctor had again been called in, but ho said I would grow out of it in time and gave me more medicine, but instead of gaining I kept getting worse, and was at last obliged to take to my bed. One day while lying reading I chanced to come across a cure made by Dr. Williams‘ Pink Pills, and this deâ€" cided me to try them. Before I had taken the pills long I began to feel a decided improvement and my friends also said I was beginning to look like my old self again. From this on the improvement was steady, but I continued to take the Pills for a couple of months, when I felt that the cure was complete. Several years have passed since then and as I have remained in the best of health I am warranted in saying that the cure is permanent, and I freely give this statement for «he benefit it may bring to others.‘"‘ ‘‘Have you fixed up the date for the wedding yet, young man ?‘ _ _ Dr. Williams‘ Pink Pills are sold by all medicine dealers or may be had by mail at 50 cents a box or six boxes for $2.50 from The Dr. Williams‘‘ Medicine â€" Co., Brockâ€" ville, Ont. Said Mr. Bullion to nis inten:dled sonâ€"inâ€"law : A Tonic Such as [z. Williams‘ Pink Pills is Promptly Needed. WHEN HEALTH end for free samiple to Dept. W. E. ienal Drug & Cnemieal Co.. Toronte. FATHERâ€"INâ€"LAW‘S CHANCE. Painless dentistry. Unshrinkable underwear Tasteless Castor oil. Quick detachable tires. Dustless dusters. 7)) MODERN MYTHS SOLVED IS RUN DOWN PRISON How to Do It Thoroughly With Little Trouble. In the first place. swpply yourself with sweeping sheets. How many of you have them ready? A substitute is sometimes supplied by using the soiled shects from the bed for coverâ€" ing the furniture, but that is not exâ€" actly a clean method. 5 Don‘t dose the baby with soothâ€" ing mixtures and narcoticsâ€"they were never krown to help any baby. You might just as well dose the grown up man or woman with opium or cocaineâ€"the result would be the sameâ€"a permanent injury to mind and body. When baby is ill give him a medicine that will cureâ€" a medicine free from injurious drugs. Such a medicine is Baby‘s Own Tablets.. They are baby‘s greatest friend. They never do harmâ€"always good.. Concerning them Mrs. Richard Mulloy, Laviâ€" gan, Sask., writes: Baby‘ s Own Tablets should be in every home where there are small children. We gave them to our baby when he was teéthing and they kept him good natured and healthy.‘" The Tablets are sold by medicine dealers or by mail at 25¢. a box from The Dr. Williams‘ Medicine Co., Brockville, Ont. Should you wish to purchase new sheets buy the coarse unbleached cotton cloth, double width, and bind it with turkey red. Make the sheets big enough to cover the largest piece of furniture you wish to protect in this way. Dress yourself for your work before you begin itâ€"a cotton frock which Ats easily in the waist and sleeves, so that your movements may not be bhampered; easy shoes, a sweeping cap, which will protect the hair enâ€" tirely, and, if you are careful of your hands, a pair of loose, old gloves. It‘s Nature. "I noticed in the store we visited toâ€" day everybody was crowded around the perfumery counter." "That‘s not surprising." "Why not?" "Oughtn‘t perfume naturally to be 1 scenter of attraction?"â€"Baltimore American. Begin your work by carrying from the room ail small objects which you cannot lay on some chair or couch, that can be covered afterward. Dust them before you lay them aside, using a cheesecloth or chamois cloth duster which has been slightly dampâ€" ened. Not So Green. § "Yeou city chaps think yeou are aretty smart, don‘t yeou?" drawled the farm lad. ‘"Ever been to one of our spelling bees?" "Never had the pleasure," responded the eity boarder. "Waal, by heck, yeou‘ve missed a lot. Now our favorite catchword is ice." "Because it is easy to slip on. Ha, ba, hal"â€"Chicago News. lar ? Nexts move,, out of the room all small pieces of furniture which can be taken from the room easily, dustâ€" ing them also before they are banâ€" ished. "Why, that only has three letters. Why should the word ice be so popu:â€" Cover closely with your styeeping sheets all the furniture which canâ€" not be removed, using smaller cloths for draping pictures and other wall ornaments which cannot readily be taken down. Rugs and the like will, of course, have to be taken out. _There are many ugly figures in the bistory of Monaco, even in Roman times. It was near Monaco that Viâ€" tellius won his great victory over Otho. Both of them were peculiarly fine types of Roman decadence. To Viâ€" tellius (as Ethel Colburne Mayne menâ€" tions in ‘"‘The Romance of Monaco‘) gluttony was one of the lesser vices. In the space of four months he spent more than seven millions, reckoning in medern money, upon food and drink. Have ready your damp tea leaves or damp shredded paper for sweepâ€" ing. Never do dry sweeping. The dust flies, no matter what care you exercise. When you use the damp tea leaves it does not have the chance to blow about the room and fill every ?iChiet or crevice which supplies room or it. Sweep from the corners and sides ‘of the room to the centre. Go into every agcess with your broom. _____. \ "Absurd!" said his friend. can‘t be. Let‘s count it !" A Reunion Task. The two old friends met after a sepnaration of ten years. "I declare, you heve kept your youthful looks to a surprising extent," said one. *"*Thank you," said the other man. "You‘ve done pretty well too. You know you expected to be absolutely bald â€"long before this, like your father, instead of which I really beâ€" lieve you have as much hair left as I have, if not more."" + Dollar Telephones. ‘‘We in London think ourselves fortunate in getting the telephone for $20 a year as subscription and 1d. per local call," remarks the Canâ€" adian Gazette, London, Eng. ‘"The people of Port Arthur, Ontario, are rejoicing in a far better service for one dollar per year for private houses and two dollars for stores, and even at these low figures we read the teleâ€" phones yield a profit. Mr. Buxton is about to take over the National Tele phone service. He hid #etter send one of his smart young men to the Lake City to find out how much bet> ter they manage some things in Canada." TiPS ON SWEEPING A ROOM. GIVE BABY A CHANCE. 99 The Perfect Glutton. "MH, We can‘t help liking the man who doesn‘t say what he thinks when his hat blows off and rolls in the mud "But I am so unworthy, darâ€" ling,"‘ he murmured, as he held the dear girlis. hand in mss _‘ _ _ "O George,"" she sighed ; ‘"if you and papa agreed on every other point as you do on that, how happy we could be." Dinerâ€"‘‘Waiter, this knife is blunt, and the steak is like leaâ€" ther.‘" How funny a joke isn‘t when it‘ on you! If any man ever admired his wife that man was Howler. Ard when the Fitzzoodles asked Mrs. Howler to get up and ‘sing, There is a garden in my face,‘"‘ the busband glowed all over with delight and pride. "What?" said his neighbor, who was a little deaf. ‘Don‘t you think my wife has got a fine voice?‘ repeated Howler. "What ? ~ ‘"Don‘t you think my wife‘s got a fine voice?‘ roared Howler. ‘Sorry !‘ returned the neighbor, shaking his head. ‘"‘Can‘t bhear a word you say. That awful woman over there is making such a frightâ€" ful row, singing.‘‘ quick!ywé(vdps coughs, the throat and luegs Red, Weak, Weary, Watery Eyes. Relieved ‘By Murine Eye Remedy. ‘Try Murine For Your Eye Troubles. You Will Like Murine. It Soothes. 50e At Your Druggists. _ Write For Eye Books. Free. Murine Eye Remedy Co., Toronts Little Margieâ€"Do you belong to a brass band, Mrs. Braggs! The Callerâ€"No, dear. What put. that into your head? Little Margic â€" Well, mamma said you were always blowing your . oGwn. horn, so 1 thought you must belong to a brass band. : Gravel, Dropsy and Diabetes are all other Kidney Diseases or are caused by diseased Kidneys. The easy and natural way to cure them is to use Dodd‘s Kidney Pills. They never fail to cure any form of Kidâ€" ney Disease. No matter that she had a face like a hippopotamus, and a voics like an elephant, he sat beaming as she sang, and could not refrain from bending over to his neighbor and whispering : ‘‘Don‘t you think that my wife‘s got a fine voice !‘ Waiterâ€"‘‘Yessir; do nicely for stropping the knife on, sir.‘" It‘s mighty hard being patient patience. Minard‘s Liniment Cures Burns, Etc. "I had pains in my back and across the loins. My stomach would swell, I was constipated and I had sharp cutting pains in my bladder, which made me sure that I was sufâ€" fering from the terrible Gravel. The doctor attended me, but I kept getting worse every day. "‘Others had told me of the great good Dodd‘s Kidney Pills had done them and I determined to try them. Six boxes made a new man of me." Sundridge man suffering from Graâ€" vel, Diabetes and Dropsy finds an Easy and complete Cure. Sundridge, Ont., Oct. 17. â€" (Special).â€"Gravel, Diabetes and Dropsy are a terrible combination for one man toshave. It means that his life is in the gravest danâ€" ger, unless like George Vanhooser, a wellâ€"known resident of this place, he finas the simple and natural cure. Here is the story Mr. Vanâ€" hooser tells, and all his neighbors know every word of it is true : BUT DODD‘s SIDNEY PILLS YANQUISH®» THEM ALL, ¢ "I @ m P via';.».j F 9. & Y ~B Em E& C 3 A 5) 9 if; c & ARHEY %.P WAS UP AGAINST A HARD CGOMBINATION wWHAT HE THOUGHT. PRESENCE OF MIND The days are short, The summer‘s spent; We, too, are caught Without a cent. ISSUE NO. 43â€"10. AFTERMATH. AGREED. cures colds, heals a je m 25 cents. Mr. William Kenty, of Upper Nine Mile River, Hants Co., N.S., says : I suffered terribly from piles, the pain at times being almost unbearable. I was tired of trying various remedies, when L heard of Zamâ€"Buk, and thought as a last reâ€" source I would give this balm a trial. _ After a _ very short trial Zamâ€"Buk effected what several other ointments and medicines had failed to doâ€"a complete cure." Zamâ€"Buk is also a sure cure for skin injuries gnd diseases, eczema, uleers, varicose veins, cuts, burns, bruises, chaps, cold sores, etc. 50c. box all druggists and stores, or post free from Zamâ€"Buk Co., Toâ€" ronto, for price.. Refuse harmful imitations. If a young man doesn‘t get wise when he is courting a girl with a small brother, it isn‘t the small brother‘s fault. Minard‘s Liniment for sale everywhere. Only a woman who has been a spinster for a number of years can fully appreciate a husband. PAINKWJILLER _ is the best, the safest and the surest remedy for cramps, colic and diarrhoca. As a liniment for wounds and sprains it is nnequalled. Avoid substitutes, there is hut one "Painkiller"â€"Perrv Davia‘ â€"25c. and 50¢. IN THE SUBURBS. "‘"Are you going to have a garden next summer?‘ T think_not? «Aremt you going to try and raise anything ?" "Oh, yes ; I‘m trying to raise the mortgage.‘‘ Friction on veins (the hemorrhoid veins) that are swollen, inflamed and gorgedâ€" with blood,; is what causes the terrible pain and stingâ€" ing and smarting of piles., Zamâ€" Buk applied at night will be found to give ease before morning. Mr. Thomas Pearson, of Prince Albert, Sask., writes : ‘ Last summer 1 sufâ€" fered greatly from piles. I started to use Zamâ€"Buk and found it gave me relief, so I continued it and afâ€" ter using three or four boxes I was completely cured ‘"‘¥es, George, I suppose they did." Ae gentleman was put out of paâ€" tience by some blunder of his new groom. i uc "Look here,"‘ he said, in his anâ€" ger, "I won‘t have things done.in this way. . Do you think I‘m a fool ?" Magistrate Sanford, of Weston, King‘s Co.; N.S., says: "I suffered long from itching piles, but Zamâ€" Buk has now cured me." "Ha! hal" CGeorge laughed. ‘"Ha! halt That‘s a good joke!‘‘ He thought his friend was foolâ€" ing him. But when at about eleven o‘clock the next morning the sun darkened and the chickens did go to roost, George was amazed, and somewhat horrified. He sought the astronomer. and said : "How long,â€"sit, did you know about this?"‘ _ said George. â€" "Oh, a long time !‘‘ "Did you know they would go to roost a year ago F‘ i "Yes ; fully 4 year ago. ‘ ‘‘Well, that. beats all!" _ sard George, in an awed voice. ‘"Them chickens wuzzen‘t hatched a year a:go.)) SsSick Keadaches$Sâ€"â€"â€"â€"â€" "I ~know â€"â€"it, the little fellow my fault." ‘"Are you sure it wasn t!?" queriâ€" ed the teacher. "Yes, ma am.._. answeredâ€"Tomâ€" my, "I tried my best to think up x good _ exceuse, â€"but â€"L â€"â€"qust couldn‘t." ‘(George, if you‘ll watch the chickens out at your place toâ€"morâ€" row morning about eleven o‘clock youll see them allâ€"g> to roost.‘ _ "What you told me is true, sir. My chickens went to roost, sitr, just like you said they would." HE WASN‘T TO BLAME. eTommy,"" _ saidâ€"â€" the beacher, "you know very well you have no good excuse for staying away from school yvesterday." ‘Fool, sit V‘ said the groom. ‘‘I can‘t say, sir, I only came here yesterday." & Before a total eclipse of the sun an astronomer remarked to an old laborer whom he knew : Some men make a specialty of beâ€" ing honest when they are wateched by the police. Minard‘s Liniment Relleves Neuralgla. are not caused by anythiug wrong in the head, but by constipation, biliousâ€" ness and indigestion. _ Headache powders or tablets may deaden, but cannot cure them. Dr.. Morse‘s Indian Root Pills do cure sick headâ€" ache in the sensible way by removing the constipation or sick stomach which caused them. â€"_Dr. Morse‘s Indian Root Pills are purely vegeâ€" table, free from any barmful drug, safe and sure. When you feel the headache coming take Dr. Morse‘s ndian Root Pills WHY SUFFER FROM PILES: Zamâ€"Buk Gives Certaix Ease. wWHY HE COULDN‘T SAY. MARVELS OF SCIENCE teacher,"‘ replied "But it wasn‘t Wifleâ€"""D‘ye know you‘re growâ€" ing quite handsome, Hubbiec!‘ Hubbieâ€"‘‘Yes; it‘s a way I have when it gets anywhere near your birthday. ‘ They Spend Practically the Whole of Their Lives In Beds. Just like confirmed invalids, oysters spend their lives in beds. The prinâ€" cipal parts of an oyster are salt water and a handsome stomach. AN IMFOSSIBLE THING to find a plaster equal to "The D. & L." Menthol Plaster, and it is being imitated. Get the genuine. For side aches, backaches, stitches, nothâ€" ing equals it. Made by Davis & Lawrence Every oyster has a motherâ€"ofâ€"pearl lined overcoat with the moss on the outside. But a \Waldorfâ€"Astoria oysâ€" ter gathers no moss. Oysters, as a rule, keep their mouths shut, but when they have been in soâ€" ciety too long they begin to gape. ‘They are fond of playing games, one of their favorites being ringâ€"aroundâ€" aâ€"rosy. In this game they join shells in a cirele on a plate. They live in the ocean in summer and during the winâ€" ter months frequent the principal hoâ€" tels and restaurants, where they bhave reserved seats on cakes of ice speâ€" cially prepared for them. They are rarely met with at huskings or church fairs. Dear Sirs,â€"I can recommend your MINâ€" ARD‘S LINIMENT for Rheumatism and Eprains, as I have used it for both with excellent results. An oyster is a conchologist by naâ€" ture, a bivalve by profession and an appetizer because he cannot help himâ€" self.. There are girl oysters as well as men oysters; but, so far as is known, one is not superior to the other. Oysters vary in size according to their cireumstances and their bringing up. . Some are harder to swallow than others. There is noâ€" particular rule about this. But if at first you don‘t succeed, try, try again. © Johnâ€"â€" ‘Yes‘rm; but he didn‘t ’w““ 2 y ns keep his job long after he got her.‘ |minard‘s Liniment Cures Dzandruf IODINQL 92,°3 Eis LW EME J L. 6 for 55 A Wellâ€"Known NMan. Minard‘s Liniment Co., Limited In June the oysters ought to be as ravre as the days.â€"Thomas L. Masson in Judge‘s Library. WHERE IT WENT. Blobbsâ€"‘‘So he broke off the engagement, ch? Did she take it to heart ?" The National Life Assurance Gompany Head GOffise â€" Toronto The National Life Wants Mn NOÂ¥ Guaranteed to contain no morphine, opium or other poisonous drugs, by the National Drug and Chemical Company of Canada,r Limited, C a s 2 Mon The most highly efficient application for the reduction of Swellings, Goitre, Thick Necek, Glandular Enlargeâ€" ments. Its Positive. ?EE.ES of all kinds, in any and all stages, quickly reâ€" lieved and positively cured. _ â€"Cure your suffering and. live quietly. ‘"Cemmon Sense"" for Piles will do it. $x¢a box, €5 for 6 boxes. Mailed on receipt of price. LYLE Slobbsâ€"""No, to court.‘"‘ The National Life bas openâ€" ings in a number of Ontario town and rural dlstricts for good, live, energetic Insurance Agents. Workers make big money. Our Policies have every mod:â€" ern saving clause for the proâ€" tection of the beneficiary, and to explain them to a prospect is to surely ‘ write him ". Write for information toâ€"day. OYSTERS ARE LAZY. Why let that headache spoil your day‘s work or pleasure? Tal MEDCINE ComraNny, Yours truly, T. B. LAVERS, St. John The Queen City Uil Company, Limited, Taronto. TOCRONTO [NORTY FAMOUSâ€"ENGLISH SONGS, FEFIY }j conts. FKifty Gems Scotbish Sonz, Seventy. five conts. Sixty Gems Irish Song, Seventy â€"fire cents. Words and Music. Ashdown‘s Music Store, 144 Victoria Street, Toronto. ANTEDâ€"SOUTH AERICAN WARRANTS, ‘/V Highest g{rica paid. Write us for infor mation. Fox & Ross, Stock Brokers, Scoth St. Toronto. _ t A__ machines, making u trade at your home, whol emce not mecessary. For Canadian Wholesale Di Ont., Dopt. W. L]mkm Tiin BiRSsERâ€" 1RADKâ€" NEW system"â€"constant practiceâ€"careful instrusâ€" tionâ€"few weeks comp.ete courssâ€"tools free. Graduates carn twelve to eichtoon dollars weakâ€" ly. Write for catalogue. Moler Barber College, 221 Queen Kast, Toronto. Uncle Jerry Peebles was returnâ€" ing from the fumeral of an acâ€" quaintance. .‘ Well, T‘ll . say one thing for old Josh McGimbiet, ‘ he remarked, with an effort to be cheerful, â€" ‘"he â€" limed a "cons: â€"teut life, anybhow. He always tuck ms liquor straight, and in all us 83 years he never drunk his coffee any other way than out of his sasser. â€" C ANSER, Tumors, Lumps, etc. luternal and external, cured without pain by our home treatment. Write us before too late. Dr. Bellman Medical Co., Limited, Collingwood. Ont: amd faded Suits would look better dved. If no agent of ours in your town, write direct to Montreal, Box 15% . British American Dyeing CGo GRNTS CAN MAKE $6 DAILY SELLING A CVOLâ€"PEKK" Granite Cemont. Mends twies in all kinds of Pots and Pans, Graniteware, Iron, ‘Ninware, etc. Mends in two minuteg, Every housekeeper buys. â€" Bost sellet. Over 1008 profits. 1. Nagle, Westmount, Que. StQ ?‘i@@fig g BR.B. J. KENDALL CO. Enosterg Ealls, Vt. Limp .cc\ 4 As Your Qversoats GHNLS, BITHER SEX ARK YOU MAWKâ€" ‘[E\ ing $3 Eer day? If not write inmailiately or our FRER RLA IiORATTg‘. OUTFIT of Holiday Raatem unmemepevand esnt ORILLIA, â€" â€" GnTARIO RAW FURS Ghen buying your Piano insist on havmg an (a Makers of the famous "2 in z" Shoe Polish, ARTIES WANTED Q@TTO §1GEZL"~ Change that limping, useless lorse intfo a sound, healthy horse, willing and cager to do a good day‘s work. Don‘t let a Spavin, Curh, Splint Sprain, Ringbone or any other Lame ness keep your horse in the stable Cure it with j or 5 y BRenrndall‘ s tR 2o $1, a bottleâ€"6 for €5.. Rxcellent for househbold use, Sold by @11 flealers. Ask for free book "A Treatise Ou The Horse" or write us for copy. 55 It cures without leaving a, scar, blemish or white hairsâ€"because it does not blister. Port Kalls, B.C., June I4th 1909 "Have been using your Liniment for years aund find it all that yourepresent. Have not been without it for 10 years." GEORCGE GORDON. w. C. GOFFAT7 If your dealer does not carry ‘‘Black Knight‘" Stove Polish in stock, send us his name and 1oc, and we will send a full size tin by return mail. } is not only the biggest can for the money, but by far the best preparation for polishing stoves, pipes, grates and ironwork. Not a messy liquid or powder, or cake which must be scraped, but a large can of wonderâ€"working paste. Stove Polish THE F. F. DALLEY €0., LIMETED, HAMILTON, ONT. ASK ME WHAT Piano Action Sm beern en en es cessary. For all particulars adtfrtgsa Wholesale Distributing Co., OsMiaA, i7 ARE WORTH Spavin Care (ED to run hand knitt}ng ing up knibted goodx for the whola or spare trme ; oxpantâ€" wvernemin so0 e on cantl â€" ag Nichols Company, Montreal, 31