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by the : largely or ommA and dige in oTNA scarcity. s water, no dis« rnament e would eresting andards | others superflu« ‘rinkets, Hhice wa who by: but ard on York 3 is nmd= ould y to 10 V @ m@ M @ c us er T® 1@ ay 1 A% 1@ L um at It 13 John Bull has a rooted objection to| everything "new fangled." When the* Act was passed requiring owners of | "common stageâ€"carts" to place their‘ names upon their vehicles in letters of | a given size, by a curious oversight no clause was inserted to secure that these names should be legible, and every advantage was taken of the clr-l cumstance to circumvent the new law. A wag of a baker at Guildford, in Surâ€"| rey, scattered his name all over the cart, placing a lotter in each panel.| The most ingenious device, however, was that adopted by an Acton man.| What he was required to put on his cart was "Amos Todd, Acton: a uuce-l .cart." He regrouped the letters lll such wiso that they read: "A most odd act on a stageâ€"cart."â€"Jan., 1884. | "Someone has SUgZO: inventor of the phon Eggs are cheap in the Shetland Isâ€" lands. A young man went there, and after a day‘s walking thought he would like some dinner. They bad nothing but eggs at the house. He said, "Bring A man will carry twoenty soveroigns in his waistcoat pocket, but a woman ndeds a morocco purse as large as one‘s fist, and too heavy to be carried in the pooket, to escort fire shillings, a couple of postage stamps, a recipe tor making curryâ€"powder, and two patâ€" terns of dress goods.â€"Feb, 1882. ;‘3â€" _ â€"nts worth." They brought two dozon and told him the qt_lon would come presently.â€"Aug. bring out a little machine to be atâ€" tached to the door which would say, A fashionable lady witness fainted dead away while giving her testimony, and the doctor who was summoned said it resulted from her corset being too tight. The incid=nt was very proâ€" perly entered upon the minutes of the A young lady said to her lover: "William, how far is it around the world?" "About twenty inches, my darling," replied he, as his arm enâ€" circled her waist.â€"Dec., 1$84. A celebrated dandy was one evening in company with a young lady, and obâ€" serving her kiss her favorite poodle ho advanced and begged the like favor, remarking that she ought to have as much charity for him as she had shown to the dog. "Sir," said the belle, "I never kissed my dog when he was a puppy." The fellow took the hint and went off instanter.â€"June, 1883. R BOY SCOUT cowBovy. When unable to capture a horse that had been on range all summer, an Ontario farmer applied to the Otâ€" tawa District Boy Scout Headquartâ€" ers for a Scout roping expert. The boy was taken out to the farm and promptly succeeded in lassoing the horse. This farmer had seen an exâ€" The Patrol at Lucan will soon be nE fullâ€"fledged Troop, we think. They | have already recruited themselves an | Assistant Scoutmaster, who has startâ€" ed in to acquaint himself with the Tenderfoot and Second Class Tests. Good work, Lucan Lonies! We are glad to hear from Lone Scout Dalton Woodward of Canningâ€" ton to the effect that the Lonies in that place have organized themselves into the "Ow!" Patrol. If they use the wisdom popularly attributed to that wellâ€"known bird, we know that the "Ow!" Patrol will be a success. We wish them lots of fun and good luck., Records at Dominion Headquarters, Ottawa, show that 50,880 Canadian Boy Scouts have taken First Aid Training, and 15,631 have qualified for the Advanced First Aid "Ambulance Man" badge. * The "Hounds" at Milford still conâ€" tinue to do good work, and they keep ':Qn the trail" through thick and thin. We notice that they turned out in fulil force to a Remembrance Day Parade recently, For quite a number of Scouts this training has provem the first step *to a University Degrese in Medicine. The diversified training which the Boy Scout Programme gives to a boy frequently enables him to decide on the career for which he is most fitted. "Lone E" hopes that all the Lone Bcouts of Ontario will have a very MHappy and Prosperous New Year! What will be YOUR New Year Resoâ€" lution for 19327 It you are already a Scout, he hopes that you will re solve to make your Scout Programme full of activity and advancement, and it you are NOT a member of the Boy Scouts Association, he hopes that you will resolve to join the great Worldâ€"Wide Brotherhood of â€"Scouts without delay, In any case, Good Scouting to you allt Jokes of the Past SCOUTS BECOME DOCTORS. "a stay in the proceedings."â€" PATROL NEWS. *ed that it the W_n;!'l ATHE ”,z{% NEâ€"SCOUTS .2 At a cortain theatre not long ago a gontleman asked a lady frieond in front of him if she had any objection to removing her Gainsborough, She had not, and gladly obliged him. ‘The play proved to be a miserable hodgeâ€" podge, and after the first actâ€"t!s gonâ€" tleman satd, "Thank you groamily, but Jawson: "How did your automobile journey turn out " Dawson: "Beautifully! Alithough I ran ovor two pedestrians and three bicycles and knocked two wagons into a ditch, my motor was not at all inâ€" jured, and I arrived just on time."â€" At a recent duel near Vicksburg, the parties discharged their pistols withâ€" out effect, whereupon one of the secâ€" onds interposed, and proposed that the combatants should shake hands. To this the other second objected as unnecéssary. "Their hands," ho said, "have been shaking half an hour."â€" Feb., 1882. A fashionable young lady accidentalâ€" ly dropped one of her false eyebrows in her opera box the other evening, and greatly frightened hor beau, who, on seeing it, thought it was his mousâ€" tache.â€"Dec., 1881. CGentleman (who has stepped upon her dross): "A thousand pardons, madam." Lady (pleasantly): "It‘s3s of no consequence, sir." What she said of him: "Awkward, stupid fellow! My gathers are all torn out and I‘ve got to go home." What he said to himâ€" self: "Confoundedly ridiculous fashion, those trains in the street! Make a man look like a fool, cutting up such capers with them!"â€"January, 1886. A bicyclo dealer has utilized the happy thought of presenting a pair of crutches and a box of court plaster to each purchaser of a bicycle. Hoe is monopolizing the trade.â€"Dec., 1886. Two brave young ladies, whilst alone one evening recently, were reâ€" hearsing how they would dispatch a burglar it one suddenly appeared in the room. One of the heroines was armed with her brother‘: sword, and the other flourished a matchet. In the midst of a rehearsal a "frightful monâ€" ster" in the shape of a mouse ran across the floor, when one of the girls incontinently fainted and the other smashed a $50 mirror in attempting to climb upon the bureau. when the landlord called for the rent, "Come again next month!" it would have a good sale. So it would: and if he wanted a name for it ho might call it the postphonograph.â€"Sept., 1882. If you are not already a Scout and would like to be one, why not write at once to the Lone Scout Departâ€" ment, Boy Scouts Association, â€" 330 Bay Street, Toronto. They wili be glad to send you particulars, Lone Scouting is intended for boys in small towns and villages and on rural routes, where there is no regular Scout Troop. scouTt sTATUES. Two Boy Scout Statues appear over a corner window of the new Governâ€" ment "Confederation Block" at Otâ€" tawa. They commemorate public seryâ€" ico rendored by Scouts, including the location of decoration of the graves of the Fathers of Confederation for the Diamond Jubilee of 1927. Returns which are coming in to Lone Scout Headquarters at Toronto show that these columus are being read with duterest by many> <boys throughout this Province, Application for membership in the Loneâ€"Scouts average one per day. The Camp equipment of a certain Alberta Scout Troop this summer included a cow. She went along to solve the "Safe Milk" problem. We wonder how much competition there was to be the first up in the morning to milk her? We wonder if any Ontario Lone Scouts will be there? When a Winnipeg Scout‘s collie was run over by a fruck and had a leg broken, his young owner improvised splints, used a handkerchiet and necktie for bandages, and carried the dog to a veterinary, where the leg was placed in a cast. We believe that Doggie is well on the road to recovery. ANOTHER WORLD JAMBOREE. Arrangements are being made for some 25,000 Boy Scouts from 45 counâ€" tries to attend the next World Scout Jamboree in Hungary in 1933. The Jamboree will be held at Godollo, the former estate of the late Emporer Francis Joseph I, which has been placed at the disposal of the Scouts by Admiral Horthy, the Regent of Hungary. hibition of Scout Lariat work at the Ottawa Fair. FIRST AID FOR DOGS. Whilst a Lonie‘s First Aid training is not primarily intended for use in animals it works just as well. "LONE E." Los Angeles. â€" Policae were faced with one of the toughest jobs they‘ve had for a long timeâ€"but it wasn‘t any tougher than that of the thieves they were sent out to capture. ‘The crooks had stolen seven pot skunks belonging to R, N. Bawman, and the cops were sent out to locate and bring back the animals. Gas masks were part of the equipment taken along. Although the electric bell is now in vogue in many hotels, its use is not yet allowed to disturb the leisurely habits of the waiters, it wo may judge by the following directions, posted over one of the bells in a house of enâ€" tertainment at a seaside resort; "Push the knob. If you do not get an ansâ€" wer in fifteen of twenty minutes, push it again.‘"â€"Sept., 1883. At a recent dinner party in Paris the host provided a novelty which may, possibly, become a feature of dinner parties in the electric age. _ Beside each plate was a telephone, which was connected with a.distant salon, where a superb orchestra was playing. The guests were thus able, between the courses, to pass the time pleasantly in listening to good music instead of making obvious remarks about the weather.â€"Aug., 1883. won‘t you please replace your Gainsâ€" borough? I prefer the hat." There have been a good many times in a long theatrical experience when a disclaimâ€" ing critic would much "prefer the hat." â€"May, 1882. Bessieâ€""What do you think of higher education*" Bertâ€""It‘s all right, except in the colleges where they let it take up too much time from football pracâ€" tice." One Florida football toam has a young alligator as mascot. Here we soe "RBilly" in the company of a coâ€"ed and cheor leader. Mary Rico of Keeowatin, Minn., and Charles Brown of Battle Ground, Ind., with Sit Thomas Lipton trophy cups awarded at 4â€"H club congress in Chicago as "outstanding girl and boy." TOUVGH JOB Chicago‘s Leading Girl and Boy ‘Gator Mascot | Washington.â€"The goal ofâ€" successâ€" |ful longâ€"distance weather forecasting may be brought nearer through the inâ€" ; vention of a "brass brain" designed to figure changes in the sun‘s heat. "Brass Brain" May Predict Weather That virtue which requires to be ever guarded is scarcely worth the sentinel, The first known specimen ‘of a cross between a moose and an elk was reâ€" cently killed in the Deerlodge National Forest, in Bear Gulch. The animal had a body and horns that were half elk and half moose, and was known by United States forest rangers as "the elk with the funny horns." The city visitor was supercilious and inquisitive. He was wandering about the little country town, noisily and ofâ€" fensively amused at its rustic simâ€" plicity. In the course of his meanderâ€" ings he came upon a native fishing in a stream. The old fellow was gazing intently at an apple which dangled from the end of his line. The city man approached. "I say, old fellow, what aro you doâ€" ing there?" he asked, obviously amused., "Fishin‘," said the native, without looking up. "Well, what‘s the apple for?" "Bait." "Bait? Aren‘t you using a worm " â€" llYes.lD "Well, where is it?" "In the apple." The radiation apparently rises and falls over regular cycles. Dr. Abbot says these cycles seem to be the cause of changes in the weathr. It was invented by Dr. Charles G. Abbot, secretary of the Smithsonian, and calculates and evaluates changes in the amounts of radiation or heat coming to the earth from the sun, on which all life depends. The "Brain" was exhibited for the first time at the annual meeting of the regents of the Smithsonian Instituâ€" tion. Dy Recording Changes in Strength of Sun Rays Half Moose, Half Elk * Tasty Bait "I‘se got daddy," said the child. "Me hugged and kizssed daddy last night." "Willlie! â€" You know that‘s wrong. | You should say: *I hugged and kissed L- a daddy last night"." ere "That‘d be wrong, too," said Willie, $ . ‘That was Friday night." How do you like it now that mummy has gone away for a little whiloe and left you behind?" asked governess of hor charge. "I soe you have a couple of dogs," he remarked, "Have you licenses for them ?" The housewife answered the doorâ€" bell‘s ring. At her heels were two poodles, A policeman stood on the step. + The poodles frisked round the poâ€" liceman, and he patted them. "Nice, friendly little things, aron‘t they?" he said. "Yes. You‘d never think they were mother and dauâ€"â€"" "Oh, no," she replied, "they‘re too young." Throwing further light on the treâ€" mendous losses suffered by the rich, the statistics show that while 611 perâ€" sons had incomes of $1,000,000 or more in 1928, there were ouly 149 in this category in 1930. ‘The Treasury Department defines a millionaire as a person with an income of $50,000 a year, representing at 5 per cent. a capitalization of $1,000,000. And last year, ao heavy were the inroads made by the depression, only a mere 19,688 were left, New York.â€"A decrease of 23,496 in the millionaire list is shown accordâ€" ing to a report issued by the U.S. Treasury Department. In 1928 statisâ€" tics showed 43,184, while after the stock market collapse the number had shrivelled to 38,650. There are more than 1,200 known birds on the North American continâ€" ent. Scientists have now found and recorded the eggs of all of these speâ€" cies. The last to be found were those of the Harris sparrow. ‘That bird is so clever at concealing its nest and eggs that ornithologists were unable to find either despite more than 100 years of searching. Dr. George Sutton, Pittsâ€" burgh ornithologist, however, wouldn‘t give up the search,. He led an expediâ€" tion into the icy wastes on the western shore of Hudson Bay. There some 40 miles north Churchill, Manitoba, he discovered several nests and eggs of the elusive Harris sparrow. Each nest, he reported, contained five tiny eggs smaller than those of the robin. They are pale green in color, with motâ€" tled brown marbling. Most of them were found in small bushes near the ice.â€""Animal Life." "They are convinced that competiâ€" tion in armaments is leading all counâ€" tries to ruin, without bringing them security; that this policy renders furâ€" ther wars inevitable; that wars in the future wil be wars o# indiscriminate destruction of human life; that the governments‘ assurances of peaceful policy will be valueless so long as those measures of disarmament are delayed that should be the first result of the Pact for the Renunciation of War." Millions Signing New Invention May | Owl Laffs For Disarmament Eliminate Explosion Shrictmas The undersigned men and women, irrespective of party, stand for world disarmament. Mammoth Petition Circulat Device Perfected by O. A. C. ing Throughout World | _ Professor May End With less than two months before the Disarmament Conference is due to begin, the league is redoubling its energies throughout the 45 countries in which the petition has been circuâ€" lated. The declaration on disarmaâ€" ment which the friends of peace are asked to sign came into being at a meeting of the Women‘s International League at Prague in August, 1929. It runs as follows: Millionaire Class Shows London.â€"A gigantic disarmament declaration, launched in all fire conâ€" tinents by the Women‘s International League, is gathering momentum as the day for the world conference on this great question approaches. London is supplying 4,000 signatures daily to the document, which is deâ€" signed to provide sufficient head of steam to drive the statesmen of the world forward on the path of peace. Every adult in a village in Montgomâ€" eryshire, Wales, has signed. So has the entire population of several fronâ€" tier villages in France. The leagueâ€"section in Tunis has renâ€" dered the document into Arabic and is hard at work collecting signatures among the natives. India, Japan, Indoâ€" China, among the eastern countries, are parlicipating. In Canada the goal of 500,000 signaâ€" tures appears in sight. A transconâ€" tinental caravan tour which traversed the United States has visited 125 cities in 25 states and collected 125,000 sigâ€" natures. Holland, where the press has circuâ€" lated a slightly different petition, has quickly amassed 2,500,000 signatures. The whole population only numbers 8,000,000. 1,200 Species of Bird Life Habitants of N. America The summons arrived in due time. Big Shrinkage in States Gains Headway want to test your knowledgo of | ®!ncerity geology. Jones, toll me what you "othing, know about alabaster." â€" "Please, Of things sir, ho was the chap who caught the , HALlur® a Forty Thieves!" ... |ivle.. > "I say, old man," he said, "that smells good. Are you going to eat it alone?" The other know Smiffins. "Oh, no," he said, quietly. With spinach and potatoes and things like that," Smiffins was one of those men who like to get something for nothing, and whon he called upon a friend and found that & nice fa‘ chickeon had just been placed on the table, he smiled. Then he sniffed appreciatively, Sydney Bulletin: "The dole will not last long. In effect it means that those who are in work have to mainâ€" tain those who are out of work; and the time <will inevitably come when those who are carrying the burden will tell those who are unemployed to get work and support themselves, Historic Expeditions Two scientific expeditions are, now searching for the fossil bones of strange animals that once lived in Montana and Idaho. The Montana exâ€" pedition is" hunting for the bones of distant ancestors of the camel and rhinoceros that lived there millions of years ago. Under the direction of Dr. Charles W. Gilmore, of the National Museum, this party also has an eye open for the bones of animals that no longer exist, The other expedition, under the direction of N. H. Boss, also of the National Museum, is centering its operations in the Snake River Valâ€" ley of Idaho. There it is seeking the fossil remains of an extinct species of horse believed to be the "missing link" between modern horses and the threeâ€"toed steed of ancient times. 1 The Canadian end of the route has been investigated thoroughly, said Mr. Watkins, bu* the central portion is parâ€" ticularly inaccessible. The east coast of Greenland is mapped only roughly and knowledge of flying weathor and conditions in that region is practicalâ€" ly negligible, From London, the most likely route would lie over Northern Scotland, the Faroe Islands, Iceland and across Greenland about the latitude of the Arctic circle. From that point the route would be over the lower portion of Baffin Island and down the west side of Hudson Bay to Winnipeg. Over the entire route there would be no sea jump longer than 700 miles. Hamilton.â€"After many years of exâ€" perimental work, the professor of phyâ€" sics at the Ontario Agricultural Colâ€" lege, Guelph, has perfected a contriâ€" vance for testing threshing machines which will practically eliminate the danger of fire, providing certain preâ€" cautionary measures are carried out, Fire Marshal Heaton announced durâ€" ing the special Wentworth fire inquiry at Rockton. The fire marshal suggested that it might be advisable for farmers to thresh in the field rather than run the risk of losing their barns, and said that while operations were carried on indoors as a convenience, he doubted if the time and labor saved compenâ€" sated fhe farmer for the risk involved. He thought it a mistake to drive tracâ€" tors into the barns, and expressed the opinion that some other means should be found to haul separators. London.â€"The Arctic route is the most practical air link between Great Britain and North America, according to H. G. Watkins, leader of the British Artic airâ€"route expedition, Winnipeg would be the Canadian terminus of the route, althiugh he declared it would be some time before it could be used comâ€" mercially because of the lack of geoâ€" graphical and meteorological knowâ€" ledge. The mechanical device has been in the possession of officials of the Uniâ€" versity of Toronto for some considerâ€" able time, and has been found to be satisfactory after thorough inspection. Mr. Heaton said that efforts were made to have the product available for the present threshing season Hoe promised that the apparatus would be available early next year, ‘The attachâ€" ment records operations of the separâ€" ator, and .detects defects which might result seriously. Static electricity within the blower was the cause of many Ontario farm fires last year, Fire Marshal Heaton added. Just what caused this pecullar condition he could not say, but the feeling has been expressed that maâ€" chines should be grounded. The oMâ€" cial thought the speed of the mechanâ€" ism within the separator might proâ€" duce thke current, and said that in many places officials had demanded that ground connections be made, reâ€" gardless of whether threshing was done inside the barn or in the fields. Arctic Route Declared & Most Practical Air Link "Now, boys," said the master, "I The Dole in Australia ONTARIO ARcHives TOROoNTO ness, and inability to do or be; in sincerity, unbotioft, He who belioves nothing, who believes only the show of things, is not in relation to noble nature and fact at all.â€"Thomas Car Operation of the shift, says Ray Keller, inventor, is ecasy, The gear lever, moved into position of automatig shift, does away with the use of the clutch, he says. The gear runs in low until the autoâ€" mobile has reached a certain m then shifts automatically to and at thirty miles an hour moves into As the machine slows down the gears are automatically changed. Los Angeles.â€"Development of am automatic gear shift, regulated by the speed of the automobile and eliminatâ€" ing manual operation of the gear sh‘ft lever, is under way here. An ow!l may not be so wise, but at least he knows enouga not to go lumâ€" bering about, when he can‘t see where he‘s going. HMe‘s canoy enough to sit back and keep still. _ After eating fresh onions, beware of saying marveolâ€" ous. The man who can really learn can also forget. As long as womar exists on this sweet earth there will be two vital problems in her lifeâ€" men and permanent waves, Beware of a woman who will tell her honest ageâ€"she‘ll tell anything. The cheap est commodity in this world is advice. That‘s why so many people give it away. Automatic Gear Shift Operated by Car‘s Speed The Season‘s W‘shes Just around the corner From Christmas woek, Comes the New Year, Trying to poek Into Christmas packages, Wanting to find A new sort of wish In a Christmas rhyme., Yet what better greeting Than we are wishing you, Than Ye Olde Time Merrio Christmas And Happy New Year, too! be the happlest season of the year. Christmasâ€"how it has always thrill ed us since childhood! But how about those who have not been so fortunate this year? Let us spend .our Christmas this year in the most unselfish way that we have ever done. If you do not, porâ€" sonally, know some family with whom to share a happy Christmas, make ie quiry among your friends and they will give you the name of some worthy one. â€" There are many really needy families in and about your 4own. ‘This has been a hard year with the poor, In spreading joy amongst the unfor tunate, you are also spreading joy in your own heart. Exception to the Rule ‘Twas tho night before Christmas, and all through the house, not a crea ture was stirring, with the exception ofâ€"â€" When you have summed up all goog wishes expressed by your friends in their greetings to you at this Christ mas season, just remember that our wish is that every one of their wishes will come true. RADIO LOUD SPEAKER, which ennounces, "Christmas Carol, GoG Rest You Merry Gentlemen, Let Nothâ€" ing You Dismay," bro:dca‘ from Sta tion DIN. Not just the holly, not just the pine, Nor flaming of candles, makes Christ mas so fine, But the spirit of Friendship, that reaches afar, To wiSh Merry Christmas, wherever you are. FATHER, who wants to know what happened to the Christmas tree stand when ho put it away last yearâ€"â€" MOTHER, who is trying to answor the telephone and father at the same timeâ€"â€" NORMAN, aged 3, who is calling from the crib and wishing to be inâ€" formed if that noise he hears is Santa Clausâ€"â€" AN EXPRESSMAN, aged 150 by the way he feels, who is «elivering a rockâ€" ing horse at the side doorâ€"â€" AUNT AGNES, who ~as just drop ped the library table drawoer seeking a pencil to sign the receiptâ€"â€" GRANDMA, who can‘t remember what she did with the Bedtime Stories she bought. for Norman‘s stockings and who â€"wanders about like L:dy Mao bethâ€"â€" ANNABELLE, aged 16, who skips endlessly and wants to know if they can‘t unpack the new phonograph to night instead of tomorrow so she cam ask some of the boys in to dance while father trims the sreeâ€" NORA, the maid, who has just dropâ€" ped a plate in * e kitchenâ€" JACK, aged 14, who blows out & fuse while monkeying with the lights for the Christmas tree and throws the whole house in darknessâ€"â€" A DELIVERY MAN, who sounds like a troop of cavairy in the front vesâ€" tibule and who is with dificulty com vinced that he has the wrong houseâ€" To All the Readers of This Column: Thore is but one Again we approach what ought % *#