PAGE 6, THURSDAY,-JUNE 28, 1973, WHITBY FREE PRESS, BIRD eS EV£ vIew, by 1 Tral By Water Tlîat's the way J always thouglît of swimiiuîg lessous. Staîîdiiîg outside the wroughit iron fence at the Kismeii Pool and watchiîîg the kids takitig lessons it looks like there are others who are goiug thîroughi a trial by water. 1 took my swiiniing lessoiîs in Vancouver by the ocean but I think swimiming Iessoiîs are the saine, nuo nuatter wvhere yotî take theîîî. Sonue of the tinie Uie instructor is a youig rman but just as likehy as not you'l get stuck with a big bully of a girl. 1 always woîîdered whîy they lîated young boys so much. D~o this or don't do that! You feel like you're in the arnîy. Standing ini une for swiininiing lessoiîs is flot the sanie as stanîding ini une just to go swiîîîmiug. Usually there is another chass ahead of you and you cari see the frozeîî bodies huddled on the deck at une corner of the pool. The lectures on how.to do a particular stroke or even stay afloat weren't tou bad if they preceeded the water lesson but most of the bully girls like the students (o get in the water and get good anîd wet and thiinsit out on the deck for a lecture. No matter liow liard 1 tried 1 could iîever stop shaking. 1 would keep a towel liandy and try to get completely dried but 1 stili sat there shaking like a wino after a three day binge. ie prubiem i s that no matter lîow faithfully you try to listeîî to wlhat the instructor is sayiiîg you stili have one thing on your mind .... possible pneuimonia. Another rotten thing about swimming lessons is when the instructor gets'iii the. water anîd gives a demnonstratioîi it looks so easy. The itîstructor would glide effortlessly througli thie water anîd many times would even talk to the class wlîile giving the demoiîstration'. About the only thing 1 ever did well was my imitation of how to keep a 200 pound rock afloat. It wouldn't and 1 couildn'"t. No way could 1 stay afloat. 1 wasjust a skinny runt, in those days anîd 1 figured tlat hiad sometlîiig to do withi it or else 1 beloiîged to the wrong religion. Either way 1 was destiîîed to serve tirne in a submiarine because a floater 1 would iîever be. Artifical respiration was sormething else too. 1 was taughit.the Holger-Neilson rnethod and it required putting the victini iii a face dowiî position and doiïîg ail kinds of crazy tlîings with lus armis and luis lxack. After a couple of good workouts and tryilîg (o save my buddy-victim was better off drowîiing thaîî hie wa,,s to go tlîrougli ail the gyrations necessary to i)rihlg Iiin back to life. l'il bet the Holger-Neilson metlîod gzave the chiropractors a lot of business. Especially if tbey liappenied to get stuck as my victinu wvhen h was Iearning lîow to saive a life froni dro'wlu- ing. Lining up at the pool door waiting for my class time 1 knew it would be anotiier bad day. Wlîen the previous class filed out witlu blue antd clamniy bodies 1 would start shuvering and this was before h had even changed. Ail thuis agony for a Red Cross badge ini swîimming. I know whiy the badge is affiliiated with thic Red Cross .... it's because you'll need tlîeir assistance either during tlie course or after. if by some miracle you survive. men 1 wasn't shivering 1 was moving .y1rmsan legs the wrong waýy. To this day 1 can't do the breast stroke swini but 1 sure do a great dog paddle. 1 figur 'ed what the heck, if it's good enough to keep my dog afloat why won't it work for me? Well it did work for me but the. instructor wasn't at al happy with it. Slue yelled, "what are you, a boy or a dog?" 1 replied, "woof, woof." She retorted, "Quail!, get up on deck!" 1 was, if you'll pardon the pun, in the dog house.... aind 1 stili couldiî't swim properly. Wheîî I took my original swimming lessoiîs in Vancou- ver, the final test was to jump off the end of the dock and swim to shiore. Guess wlîich way I went? Yep, straiglît to the bottom. -l've been there almost ever siîice. It was probably fate tlîat 'l wouind up as, a Scuba instructor for the Canadian Association of Underwater Councils. l'Il be glad to teach you scuba .... just don't ask me to show you lîow to swim. Or worse stili, don't ask rme to swim. Oh, the shamne of it ail. 21 STGREY HIGH-RISE GI YEN APPROVAL Couiîcil gave approval rec- euîtly for Doîîbill Holdings to erect four apartnîent bui- ildings southi of Duuidas St. near Lynde Creek in con- îîection with the Lytnde Creek subdivision. Tliese will be tlîe first buildinîgs ini Wlitby of more tlîan five storey». One of the buildings will be 21 storeys high and the otlier tlîree 20 storeys. 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