WHITBY FREE PRESS, WEDNESDAY, JANUARY 21, 1976, PAGE 5 On a cold winter night, the life in a big city grinds almost to a halt. People stay inside their homes closer to fire places, wood stoves and oil furnaces. But, life on Yonge Street is seldom affected by weather conditions. Even at fifteen degrees centigrade below zero, Toronto's oldest street is very much'alive. And, after 180 years, Yonge Street is experiencing a new kind of culture, if orie could consider this as a proper term. With the introduction of a new city by-law limiting body rub establishments on and off Yonge Street, one could assume that "Toronto The Good" has made a successful comeback. Not so, judging from what I saw the other night. The short stretch from Dundas to Gerrard Street was bristling with strange activities. More than ever before, the street was filled with young ladies carrying oversized handbags, lady cops Once upon a time there was this with it cool cat see, who stood one day gazing out upon a field of rocks and said to no one in particular, "There's money in them thar rocks!" By now you may have guessed that, while the man is from California, he definitely isn't prospecting for gold but rather he's a fisherman angling for some green stuff in your wallet. By all standards he seems to be rather successful these days because so far he has netted over a million dollars by selling people, of all things, Pet Rocks. As crazy as it sounds to buy a rock as a pet, this joker may have something - besides a newly gained million dollars I mean. Take a puppy for instance. At the pet store they are so cute and lovable you can't resist so out cornes the money and home goes the pooch. Since the pet stores uses papers and advises you to do the same you spread some down for the new pup to do his thing on. Pups are not known for being too fussy and a couple of days later you come home and find out the pup has done his thing on your mail, including magazines, which were lying on the front hall floor. Have you any idea how difficult it is to wash the return copy of a bill so you can mail it back with your payment without fear that the post office might send an investigator around to see you, inquiring as to why you are sending stink bombs through the mail. Of course even the biggest of pet rocks will not wet on your mail or the evening paper before you've read it. Nor will they volunteer to bring your paper in from the front porch but that also means they won't reduce one corner of it to the pulpy mess which can result from a combination of saliva and dog's teeth. patronizing the pin ball alleys, uniformed policerihen cruising up and down Yonge Street and shabbily dressed characters lurking froi nearby restaurants and book stores. As 1 was sitting in a tiny restaurant and enjoying rny cup of coffee, two burly policemen stopped in front of the restaurant. Seconds later, they grabbed two young girls, both suspected streetwalkers. A brief "interview" followed, but there was nothing in the law book stating that a person with an oversized handbag cannot walk freely on Yonge Street-even at a late hour with no visible means of support. As soon as both policemen had left, these two young and innocent ladies picked up two young fellows. They headed to the nearby hotel. Since body rub business has slowed down, maînly because of the new by-law, the world's oldest profession is rapidly moving in and, practically, overshadowing the once popular body rub outlets. The Yonge Street regulars are quick to point out that cops are unable to cope with prostitution in its present form. It's a slick and highly synchronized operation. In order to attract prospective customers, many girls pose as hitch-hikers, street artists, flower girls and out-of-town visitors. The more affluent prostitutes "enploy" young lads for soliciti-ig purposes. Several times I was stopped by young men at various locations asking me rather bluntly, if I wanted to "have And, I can assure you a pet rock will never keep you up half the night with its whining. Birds are pretty good at night but dogs tend to whine and cats have the habit of prowling around and knocking things down such as Mng vases and beer mugs, which have sometimes carelessly been left half full. I'd say about the worst a pet rock will do at night is maybe fall off the shelf or counter and that can't be too bad, unless of course your pet rock happens to weigh in at over 200 lbs. and then you might be disturbed by the sound of splintering floorboards. Remrnember the last time you carelessly left open a cupboard door in the kitchen and your lovable pet chewed a hole in the bottom of a giant box of soap. Or how about the time lovable kitty ripped open a garbage bag and left you, to not only discover it, but clean it up as well. l've noticed that when kitty does something like this she also disappears for a half a day and then you can't even get the satisfaction of giving lier a cuff on the ear for her misadventure. From all the experience I've had with rocks I can assure you that a rock has absolutely no interest in chewing up garbage bags or soap boxes under the counter, or anywhere else for that matter. Since rocks seldom even move around you have to consider them more as thinkers rather than lovers and adventurers. Because they hardly ever mix in with other wild life, you don't have to worry about getting your pet rock over to the -et's for a rabies shot. Nor do you have to worry about needles for distemper, lockjaw, the flu or even scurvy. From what I've seen, rocks don't even get sick. I have seen a few fall apart at the seanis but I have never been sure if that was because the pressure of society got to be too much or if that was just the way rocks have babies. From what 1 gather you can also go away to the cottage skiing or snowmobiling or whatever and leave a pet rock at hone without a babysitter or even having a neighbour look in occasionally. Mind you, on the other side of the coin, since pet rocks seem to be thinkers instead of doers, they will have this tendancy to sit idly by pondering the creation of the galaxy while a couple of thugs calmy go through your house removing everything of value that can be fenced or melted down. The pros and cons of having a pet rock can go on forever and I can honestly say I haven't decided whether to acquire one for myself but if I do I think I'l take mîy chances and get a wild one frorn the gravel pit rather than a dornesticated one for S3.95. My bank manager isn't over- joyed about half the stuff I buy now. I can imagine his reaction to me writing a cheque for a pet rock. SWE'RE THE BEST IN SIGH T THE DPTICAL 866111 1 I 13 KING STREET WEST KAR. A. BLAKOLMER OSHAWAONTARIO ELFI KROHN PHONE 679-1242 DISPENSING OPTIQIANS some fun". When asked how should a go about it, the young chap- informed me: "Just go across lie ytreet to Lady Jane, ask for Michelle and from there on you're on your own". Sure enough, at Lady Jane 1 was introduced to Michelle. She was about 19 years of age and very pretty. Michelle told me that Tuesday was a "slow night" and she'd settle for forty dollars. "I guarantee, you'l have the best time of your life" she told me with a slight giggle in her voice. But, when catoldherI didn't have forty bucks to spend on her, she chastized me: "You men, you all are cheapskates! What's forty bucks today? Why dont you get lost!" I did and I was glad I saved frty bucks. Not all girls ply the world's oldest profession on Yonge Street. t'rstold thaton weekends the business is quite brisk at these locations: Sherbourne and Carleton, College anmd Spadina and Gerrard and Broadview. Of course, one must remember, the geographicallocations often change-without notice. This sort of flexibility is frowned upon by Metro Morality Squad officers. They are very much aware of the growing problen. Informed sources say most prostitutes come to Canada from the aUnited States. But, I suspect, this is only a wild guess. At any rate, watch out Yonge Street; Place Pigalle is ready to move in. Whitby man chosen as Olympie record keeper Ron Alldred, of Whitby, a driver for Town Ambulance Service, will be an official at the summer Olympics at Montreal in July. Mr. Alldred, and three members of an Oshawa family, will be acting as assistant record keepers in the shooting events at the Olympics. Mr. Alldred says he expects to be involved in rifle shooting, free pistol shooting and rapid fire pistol shooting. His job will be checking scores and putting up and taking down targets. Although this may seem a mundane job, Mr. Alldred points out that targets have to be put up in a certain manner, and the Olympics require people with previous shooting match experience to be officials. Mr. Alldred, a director of the Ontario Small Bore Federation, which officiates .22 calibre rifle target shooting in Ontario, was invited to be an Olympics official by Fred Binding, another director of the federation, who is in charge of all officials for the 50-:netre rifle and pistol shooting events at the Olympics. The other three local people taking part with Mr. Alldred are AI Cordy, of Oshawa, President of the Ontario Small Bore Federa- tion, his wife Doreen, and son David. All four are qualified officials for their sport. Mr. Alldred has seven years of experience in small bore rifle target shooting. The officials will be at the Olympic site, housed in special quarters away from the competitors, from July 11 to 24. The competitors will arrive two weeks before the Olympics begin, to practice on the rifle and pistol ranges. Police arrest youths for Dec. 28 break-in Three 16-year-old youths have been arrested by Durhani Regional police and charged with break and enter with intent, in connection with a break-in at one of the Bradley Farm model homes Dec. 28. Charged are Peter Cronin, 309 Palmerston Ave., Daniel Rints, Dundas Street West, and Scott McLellan, 31 Montgomery St.. Brooklin. A 15-year-old boy was also cnargeu in connection with the break-in which resulted in $6,000 damage to the home. Police report a second model home, on Dawson Street in the Lynde Creek subdivision, was broken into last Friday or Saturday, and about SI,000 damage done. No suspects have been arrested. HIS & HER'S HALRSTYLINGI 4 DAY SPECIAL with this coupon FREEshampoo & style: with every haircut Mon -Thurs Business Hours: Monday- Wednesday 9-6 p.m. Thursday & Friday 9-9p.m. Saturday 9-6 p.m. TONY'S HAIRSTYLING Bloir Park Plaza 668 . 5441 Members of the First Whitby Resolute Rangers will be conducting a door-to-door sale of dog licences on behalf of the Town of Whitby during January, February and March. The cost of a 1976 dog licence is Sl 5.00. Dog licences may also be obtained at the Municipal Office, 405 Dundas Street West, Whitby. R.A. CLARINGBOLD, Deputy Treasurer, Town of Whitby.