4 Friday, July 15, 2016 brooklintowncrier.com Our Brooklin Kids By Leanne Brown Do Children Get Too Many Awards? My daughter recently received a "player of the game" award. She scored six goals in a lacrosse tournament, played extra shifts, and cheered her teammates. She knew it was well deserved. Players, parents and coaches from other teams praised her efforts. As we walked from the field, she said, "Mommy, I earned this!" "You really did!" I said. "How do you feel?" "Amaze!" (Kid-peak for "amazing!") she replied, proudly ad- miring the metal trinket around her neck. A week later, a teammate received the same award. On the way home, she questioned why her teammate had been rewarded. I could see her point. The child hadn't really participated. How do I tell my girl that the other child was being rewarded because "it was her turn," rather than due to a great effort on the field? Giving awards for exceptional performance at season's end is a long-standing tradition. They provide excitement, pride, and celebration. But these days, we give trophies to children for almost anything, including for just showing up. Sometimes, every child gets one, even two. We seem to be afraid children will be hurt by losing so we make everyone "a winner." We hand out awards believing we're raising their self-esteem and motivating them to do better. Are we giving children too many trophies? Awards can motivate Yes, awards can be powerful motivators. As someone who works with employees on motivation, I see daily evidence of this. But too much recognition does not inspire people to succeed. Instead, it can cause them to become complacent. The recognition value becomes diminished. Trophies should be special things bestowed on the truly deserving. Think of Olympic medals. Every event has three and their value is defined, recognizable and symbolic. While all participating Olympic athletes and officials receive participation meals, any athlete will tell you there is no comparison to winning one. A podium finish represents an accomplishment that represents years of training and overcoming setbacks. Like most children over age five, my daughter isn't fooled by all the rewards. Kids are quick to recognize who is the best and who isn't. Those who are outperformed know it and feel cheated when they aren't recognized for their accomplishments. The ones who struggle know when they are receiving something they haven't really earned. Many parents say all kids must be treated the same so that everyone is a winner. But is this really true? There is value to learning how to lose. That's life, after all. Yet as parents we constantly spin losses into victories for our kids, making excuses and every touch of the ball as significant events. Isn't it our "job" to help kids overcome losses and see that they are improving? Achievement is more than just a win or loss. What about learning to congratulate the child or team that achieved success? Recognition from a peer is always the most valuable. Next month, our kids will watch the world's best athletes compete in the summer Olympics. They'll see athletes talk of personal bests and graciously applaud their peers' efforts whether they medal or not. That's real recognition. It's the kind that won't end up in a landfill. Next Issue: Rewarding Our Kids: What do coaches and experts say? Locally owned and operated, The Brooklin Town Crier is a publication of Appletree Graphic Design Inc. and is intended for the residents & businesses of Brooklin and Ashburn, Ontario. We accept advertising in good faith but do not endorse advertisers or advertisements. All submitted editorial material is subject to editing. For Advertising Information Contact: 905-442-9828 mulcahy42@rogers.com "Proud to be a Brooklinite" 35 Dopp Crescent, Brooklin, ON L1M 2E5 Founded in 2000 and published 24 times per year. Editor, Richard Bercuson 613-769-8629 • editorofbtc@gmail.com Circulation 8000 Delivered via Canada Post to every mailbox and to local businesses counter tops. The paper is paid for by the advertisers. Please support them generously. To pick up an extra copy visit a local business. Next Paper: Friday, July 29 , 2016 Deadline: Friday, July 22, 2016 Community Calendar If you have a community not for profit event you would like included in the calendar, please email it to mulcahy42@rogers.com with the subject line "calendar". Mondays through Fridays Community Care Durham delivers hot or frozen meals to Brooklin residents. Meals can be ordered by contacting Karen Andrews at 905-668-6223. Note that volunteers are needed to deliver Meals on Wheels to Brooklin residents. Please call our office at 905-668-6223, extension 223, to find out more. Basic Foot Care Community Care Durham provides basic foot care services by registered foot care nurses on the 1st and 3rd Tuesday of every month at St. Thomas' Anglican Church. Please call 905-668-6223 for more information. Thursday evenings Love to sing! The Brooklin United Church adult choir welcomes new voices to join us. Practices are Thursday evenings 7:30 - 9:00 p.m. You do not need to read music to be part of the choir. Practice CD's are made available. For more information, please call the church office at 905-655-4141 or by email at office@brooklinunited.ca. Tuesdays Brooklin Toastmasters, 7:15 p.m. for Meet & Greet, Meeting from 7:20 to 9:14 p.m. at the Brooklin Community Centre & Library (NEW LOCATION), Priority will be given to Brooklin events. Some editing may occur. Brooklin's Guide to Home Based Businesses To advertise in this feature contact Rhonda at 905-442-9828 Photos by Dianne www.istockphoto.com/search/portfolio/13554221 CLASSIFIEDS Custom Closets & More www.dream-space.ca 905.409.8681. Authorized HomeAdvisor GuitarDrumLessonsRepair patricksguitarstudio.com Experienced Painter - for competitive painting prices call Bryan 905-655-9983 Sarah's Sewing Alterations, Mending, Crafts, Costumes - Call or text: 905 242-4251 blue.dragonfly@rocketmail.com Job Opportunity for a RIBO Licensed Account Manager (Commercial). The ideal candidate is a strong team-player, motivated, and must love their career! View our website for details at http://bit. do/brysoncareers. Bryson Insurance is Great Place to Work Certified and a Top 10 Brokerage in Canada. APARTMENT FOR RENT Large apartment on main street Brooklin above store. Suitable for couple. No children or pets.. patio and parking Available immediately. Contact Peter 905-655-4546WORSHIP DIRECTORY WORSHIP DIRECTORY Burns Presbyterian Church 765 Myrtle Rd West (just 4 minutes north of Brooklin) 10am Worship, Kids Zone Fun & Nursery Care "Discovering God, Sharing God's Love" 905.655.8509 www.Burnschurch.org St. Thomas' Anglican Church 101 Winchester Road East Sunday Services: 8:30 and 10:30 am Sunday School & Nursery Program (10:30am) Wednesday 10:00 a.m. Communion and Healing Service 905-655-3883 www.stthomasbrooklin.ca Brooklin United Church 19 Cassels Rd. E. Sunday Services at 10:30 am Sunday School & Nursery Care www.brooklinunited.ca 905-655-4141 Come catch the Spirit! Renaissance Baptist Church of Brooklin 40 Vipond Road (Just West Of Library) Sunday Worship & Kids Program 10:30 a.m. 905 655 4554 www.brooklinrbc.ca We're here for Brooklin 8 Vipond Road, 2nd floor Boardroom (NW corner). For more information, contact John at 905-683-4439 or jajhj@sympatico.ca or Loran Weston-Smyth at lorn@lornawestonsmyth. com or 416-910-4109. Brooklin Toastmasters provides a supportive and positive environment where members have the opportunity to develop their communication and leadership skills.