The following text may have been generated by Optical Character Recognition, with varying degrees of accuracy. Reader beware!

Pree Book Reviews By John Philip Morris For over a year I have been bom- parded through the mail with adver- tisements of Books of Etiquette. Where they got my name as a good prospect I cannot guess, although at that Chicago restaurant where 1 ate frog legs and artichokes and green corn and pie and had three forks left over at the finish, there was a man who insisted upon securing my name and address. This epistolary deluge together with the Tribune's asking brazenly and boldly each day What is Wrong with the Picture and offering a dollar apiece for embarrassing moments at last gave me a behavior inferiority complex of such magnitude that put even soup into the realm of the in- hibited. So the propaganda succeeded, for really none of us are really perfect, etc. So having decided to invest in a Book of Etiquette, I naturally want- ed the best. That, as Macbeth said, was the question. There seemed to be a wide choice. I knew, however, that Lord Chesterfield was out of date and Mrs. Vanderbilt, Mrs. Palmer, Becky Table Manners nor any of the Society Leaders I knew personally seemed to be in the ranks of the au- thors. So I had to choose by publish- ers. Seeing the hall marking words A DORAN BOOK on one volume I did purchase PERFECT BEHAVIOR by Donald Ogden Stewart. Stewart I knew wrote spirit joys (jeu de esprits) for Vanity Fair, that magazine that circulated exclusively among the cultured and the etiquet- ted, and I felt instinctively that Stew- art's book would have atmosphere at least. A Vanity Fairian, Doran and PERFECT BEHAVIOR. Not good nor correct nor satisfactory but abso- lute, superlative, ultimate PERFECT behavior. Judging from the index the book covered a wide range of behaviors. How to behave at a wedding or in a train. Introduction, courtship, mar- riage. How to give at parties and how to act when one is given you. Be- havior covering the whole social field from the cradle to the grave. ach chapter split up into correct sub- heads and every other word in quotes. And all this for a mere pittance. (A pittance at today's exchange rates is just $1.90 in gold, though the publish- er will take a check). I took the booit home, removed all the superfluous clothing that might hinder the thought waves from pene- trating and plunged into etiquette. I read, T memopizedvainiggsted. Then I went forth"to conyuer. And yet--yea verily and yet-- ov IMPORTANCE OF BEING COMFORTABLE + Physical discomfort is contrary to Nature's plan; and if the cause . i$ not removed, the ultimate effect may be anything from a local pain up to a breakdown in physical vigor. Shoes are a particular source of discomfort, because the average human foot is taxed more than any cther part of the body. We walk--some more - than others--but we all do walk and are glad of it. Some walk in intermittent pein. Some chuggle along like a motor with two cylinders not working--because the efficient human foot is hindered and restrained by inhuman shoes. Some walk along briskly, with en- joyment and "pep." These are the ones who wear good shoes like Canti- lever Shoes, with room for the toes, with lines shaped to the natural foot, with flexible shank which fits up snugly and bends with the foot arch. Thus, the arch muscles, being unre- strained, help along and gain strength through exercise. Not only is your foot comfortuble, but in Cantilever Shoes you are fol- lowing the dictates of Fashion in wearing smart looking oxfords with walking heel. On Sale Exclusively on the North Shore by NORTH SHORE BOOTERY 529 DAVIS STREET Phone Ev. 6757 EVANSTON, ILLINOIS To insure proper fitting, we have installed an X-Ray machine in our store. This service to you without charge. Our Cantilever Booklet Sent on Request there must be some discrepancy be- tween the aura of my soul and the impressions recorded by my mind, if you understand what I mean. Per- haps I could put it better by saying that the circle of the instructions could not be resolved into the square of the facts. But It me expiain by giving a con- crete example. Mrs. J. P. M. and I decided to give a Hallowen party ac- cording to the instructions, EXACT- LY according to instructions. What was the result? Three of our guests were murdered bv indignant neigh- bors, one was drowned, seventeen landed in hospitals and if you have ever wondered why it was that the Wilmette Police were called up to Winnetka to help out the local force on the 31st of October last it was to persuade our guests that the party was completely over. Our own per- sonal Doctor's bill was larger than that of the caterer and if the courts ever move more quickly I may yet have to pay some of the million dol- lars in damage suits that have been filed against me. I am so used to at- tending inquests of our late guests that I long to join the morgue in an- other capacity. Besides I must not forget that the government is after me for sending obscene matter through the mails and our invitations were only copied word for word from those in PERFECT BEHAVIOR. We must have a most uncouth govern- ment, There have been many other minor mishaps due to the social cult of Stewart. I endeavored to amuse my wealthy grandmother whom J have cherished for years in a Stewartian fashion. She promptly Jdisinherited me and died before I could show her where it stood in the book. No, PERFECT BEHAVIOR is not a safe Socrates for social seekers but it is like Mr. Stewart's other works, one of the funniest books that was ever written and in it, as in The PARODY OUTLINE OF AMERICAN HISTORY, Mr. Stewart joins humor with a fine understanding and to- gether at times they almost amount to inspiration. John Philip Morris. EC WINNETKA WEEKLY TALK, SATURDAY, JANUARY 27%, 1923 At -- w-- SEE THAT YOUR CHILD Regular youngsters should have good sight. Does your youngster have it? ¥ Poor vision may lead to se- rious trouble later, if not cor- rected now with properly fitted glasses. Don't blame the child if you are in doubt about its eyes. An Examination Will Quickly Tell the Story. Dr.O.H.BERSCH OPTOMETRIST Formerly Mgr. Opt. Dept. C. D. PEACOCK, Inc. 1177 Wilmette Ave. Wilmette, Illinois For Appointment Phone WILMETTE 2766 or Res. WILMETTE 1707 IT'S EASY TO PAY FOR A CHEVROLET OUR WAY Northwestern Motor Co. 619 Davis Street « Evanston EVANSTON'S NEWEST 7 73%). Lg LTT of RNR SALT] NE NW BE A families who want th home atmosphere that a short or long stay. There are attractive Come and enjoy our Sah i 4 A TAG i] BES Vf Library Plaza dn attractive home for individuals or small by the finest hotels but intermingled with a For Reservations telephone Evanston 8000 Orrington Avenue, north of Davis Street, EVANSTON AND FINEST HOTEL VE NR =f Tr rf / IE HE nr 28 = e same service rendered adds to the comfort of terms for long leases. restaurant or cafeteria. The store for Children HOUSE-CLEANING SALE The Coming Week will be eventful at The Store for Chil- dren. We must clean house, just as all thrifty people do. They say old Mr. WINTER may hang around until April this year. Let him; see if we care! Very attractive cold- weather apparel may still be found here, and we are clear- ing out the remainder at such low prices it would be easy to fool winds and storms coming before spring. It is good to see happy young faces glow in the crisp out-of- doors at this time. Just be sure the kiddies are properly dress- ed. Sometimes they are hard on clothes, but you can now get more for your money than at most any other time. Take advantage of this house-clean- ing sale. An assortment of OVER- COATS will be closed out at $4.95 and up. Some very smart DRESSES may be had at about half orig- inal prices. A big Table Full of MISCEL- LANEOUS BARGAINS will be a special attraction. Nothing seasonable is to be carried over. These mid-winter bargains are of decidedly mu- tual advantage. They com- prise many useful articles at sharp reductions. We must prepare for spring. _-------- All Aboard for Kiddie Nook 1160 Wilmette Av. Wilmette 17 ly