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14 The Independent, Canadian Statesman Weekender, Bowmanville, Saturday, April 23,1994 By Dr. Kathlynn M. Hoch, D.C. Last week's column on osteoporosis osteoporosis leads to obvious questions regarding regarding treatment and therapy. We presented presented a nutritional approach and natural therapy. A question patients always ask - is Estrogen Therapy safe and what are the risks and side effects. effects. Estrogen is a hormone normally produced in a woman's body by the ovaries. When a women reaches menopause her body's production of estrogen declines. Estrogen is commonly commonly prescribed at menopause to treat symptoms such as hot flashes etc. or when a hysterectomy has been done to prevent osteoporosis in older women. There are known risks involved. The National Cancer institute states Handling It by Lloyd Scott y United we stand! Divided we fall! This military-like stance, adopted by many parents in raising their children, children, rests on the belief that they must always be in agreement on how to raise those children, and must always always present a united front to them. This credo of the "united front" holds that if kids see their parents disagreeing disagreeing about kids' homework, eating eating habits, household chores, bedtimes, bedtimes, allowances, dating, parties, use of the family car, etc. etc., the kids will inevitably exploit such disagreements disagreements to their own advantage. "Playing "Playing one parent off against the other," is the way it's usually described. Parents who think along these lines tend to attribute to their children a sinister kind of plotting for advantage. advantage. Hence, the need these parents feel to maintain a united front, to make sure they don't lose any ground to their potential adversaries, the children. children. The more I've thought about this point of view over the years, the more peculiar it seems. It suggests that parents are so intimidated by their children and insecure in the process process of raising kids that they require each other's agreement and support in how they respond to them. This parenting style tends to resemble the policy and decision-making process of a remote board of directors, rather than on-the-job guidance from open and honest parents. The fact is that mothers and fathers fathers may often disagree in the course of handling kids' temper tantrums, tantrums, toilet, training, their health, whether or not a child can have a friend stay overnight, or how best to help a troubled teenager. Mothers and fathers usually do disagree about matters of discipline. Why should they always try to hide these disagreements from their children, particularly if it's behind a false front of unanimity and consistency? consistency? Parents who present too tight a united front of parenting to their kids, parents who are too doctrinaire, are to some degree being dishonest. Parental united front can be a wall between parents and children. It discourages discourages family discussions and by excluding.kids, it erodes mutual trust. Parents who are always "together" possess too great a concentration of power, tending more toward the authoritarian authoritarian than the democratic. Parents who can't allow their hon-. est parental differences of opinion to be seen, at least from time to time, and to be understood by their kids are likely living in fragile marriages. Carried to extremes, united front is a lie, a cover-up of honest differences for the purpose of controlling children children and effectively squelching any dissent. I'm not recommending that it's good for children to witness their parents parents Uncontrolled arguing - about the kids or anything else. That's one extreme extreme end of the continuum. The other other end is the rigid and unyielding alliance alliance between parents, an impenetrable fortress of uncompromising uncompromising rules and expectations that shuts kids out of the parents' lives. How can children learn about their parents as individuals with differing viewpoints, if they contrive fake unanimity unanimity on all controversial issues? However, not all parents' united fronts are as seamlessly united as they may appear. Within any family alliance of two or more members, one member is usually in charge, making sure the others stay united and in line. Whenever I encounter this parenting phenomenon, it becomes becomes quickly apparent just how much the maintenance of the united front in the marriage depends on fear and coercion by one or the other spouse. This is the secret that lies behind the united front, the secret that needs to be exposed. Lloyd Scott is a marriage and family family counsellor in private practice in Oshawa and in the Orono Medical Centre. He welcomes letters from readers. Write him in confidence at this newspaper, The Canadian Statesman, Statesman, P.O. Box 190, Bowmanville, Ont. L1C 3K9. IF IT'S A QUESTION OF MONEY, WE'VE GOT THE ANSWERS "It was like winning the lottery, when that tax refund came in. I knew my money was well invested, and I had that rebate set aside for a much needed vacation. The great thing was it was my money I was getting back. " THANKS TO A MONTHLY INVESTMENT PLAN AND SOUND INVESTMENT ADVICE REGAL CAPITAL PLANNERS LTD. Call Steve Scatterty Financial Advisor, Bowmanville 623-1936 See me at the Bowmanville Home Show April 29, 30 and May 1st , that "prolonged uses of estrogens at the time of menopause increases the risk of breast cancer by 50% after a 5 to 10 year interval. Estrogen use is also linked to increased risk of. cervical cervical cancer. For this reason, if you are taking estrogen I recommend frequent frequent pelvic and breast exams and monthly self exams of the breast. Most women taking estrogen for menopause need not take it longer than 6-12 months. Then, your doctor slowly reduces estrogen therapy until you are off it completely. Therapy resumes resumes only if symptoms return and are severe. In Estrogen therapy for women at high risk for osteoporosis, the benefits benefits then outweigh the considerable risks of taking the drug. Some caution before using the drug if you have a history of blood clot formation, or a family history of breast cancer, diabetes, endometrosis gallbladder disease, heart or circulatory circulatory disease, tell your doctor if you are taking any vitamins or nonprescription nonprescription products. Notify your doctor if you notice any adverse affects. affects. Oil of Evening Primrose is very helpful to. help reduce menopausal symptoms as well as maintaining a healthy cardiovascular system. What would you like to read about in future Optimum Health News? Call us with suggestions at 623-8388. The information in this column is of a general nature. Consult your health care professional for specific health concerns. Dr. Hoch, of the Bowmanville Family Chiropractic Centre, is now in her tenth year of private practice. She has personally attended more than 30,000 patients. She supports and educates her patients to create conditions for Optimum Health, with a focus on lifestyle modification and stress management so each individual individual can work towards achieving Optimum Optimum Health and in turn educate others. others. Over 50 Agencies Gather for Mental Health Awareness Day Over 50 local agencies will provide provide information and education about their respective programs at a "Mental "Mental Health Awareness Day" on Thursday Thursday May 5, 1994 at Five Points Mall, 285 Taunton Rd. E„ Oshawa, from 11:00 a.m. - 8:00 p.m. Some of the agencies represented will include the Canadian Mental Health Association, Whitby Psychiatric Psychiatric Hospital, Oshawa General Hospi tal, Distress Centre Durham, COPE Mental Health Program and more. This event is being co-hosted by the Oshawa/Whitby/Clarington COPE Mental Health Programs and the COPE Committee members. COPE is a program of Durham Region Region Community Care Association. Everyone is welcome and admission admission is free. For further information, call Sharon Cochrane at 434-1693. CANADIAN TIRE JOIN US SATURDAY, APRIL 23RD 10:00 A.M. TO 3:00 P.M. • Meet Bert and Gert. Your children will love the Alert Twins from Stay Alert... Stay Safe. • Receive a FREE booklet. It will help your children recognize potentially unsafe situations. • Talk to a police officer. You and your children will learn important facts about child protection. Stay Alert...Stay Safe is a national charity whose mandate is to give children the skills and confidence to help them stay safe wherever they are. The charity's educational materials are funded by the Canadian Tire Child Protection Program. TOGETHER, WE'RE HELPING KIDS TO BE CAREFUL Cansdian Association ol Chiefs ol Police James Publishing Co. Ltd. FOR MORE INFORMATION, PLEASE CALL: 623-5000 2401 Hwy. 2, Bowmanville